#now i'm like 😭 every day i look forward to waking up bc i'm happy and i have ppl who love me and i wanna see them again and i wanna spend

[chrisbangs]

i finished thesis, won an award, and have graduated.. hello 👋🥸

[causenessus]

GOOD MORNING 🗣️🗣️ i know its like 6 something am but we're gonna ignore that bc i physically cannot fall back asleep (curse insomnia)!! make sure you eat enough today and drink water! idk when you're gonna answer this ask but im assuming at nighttime like usual so dont forget to take your meds 🙂‍↕️

omg recently ive been having matcha a concerning amount like i went to an asian store like a WEEK ago and now like every day im making something with it... it's probably fine though?? i wasnt even a big matcha enthusiast before but i remembered seeing a post from you and literally all it said was matcha break and i was like "hm! that sounds pretty good tbh now i want matcha." so here i am, after buying matcha. addiction isn't pretty/j

ANYWAY when i was trying to fall asleep i randomly remembered when u put up a shelf and accidentally messed up a tag on your post about it😭 i think it said something like "if you're rintarou suna i don't care" and when i read it i was like oo that's not! and then u reblogged it with the correction BUT APPARENTLY IM THE EXCEPTION ‼️ i think we got married under that post LMAOAOAO so i remembered all of that when i was trying to fall asleep and then i js started laughing it was so stupid omg,, pushed back my sleeping like 15 minutes but it was worth it bc it was funny

SO ITS MY FIRST DAY BACK TO SCHOOL TODAY OH MY GOSH 😨 itll probably fine im just dramatic but theres sm people i do NOT wanna see. like keep them far away from me or ill flip my shit type of not wanna see 🥰 so thats always fun yk! we're in this together now ness 🙂‍↕️

HAVE A GOOD DAY!! <333

HELLO HELLO SAV!!! i'm sorry for how long it took me to answer your ask </33 PLEASE MAKE SURE TO EAT AND DRINK AND TAKE YOUR MEDS AS WELL!! THANK YOU SO MUCH LOVE <3

matcha addictions are really not pretty LMAO for my wallet or anything else but honestly i love it!! and i'm so happy to have converted you!!! they're super super good i actually love that their bitter and honestly i will drink any matcha no matter if it's sweet or unsweetened 😭😭 my addiction is so bad that i even drink like two a day usually but at least....it's energizing...!!!!! so i hope you're enjoying your matchas <33

AND LMAO THE WAY I BURST OUT LAUGHING ABOUT THAT STORY YOU WERE REMEMBERING 😭😭😭 I'M GLAD TO HAVE MADE YOU LAUGH BC THAT WAS NOT A PRETTY MOMENT WE DEF GOT MARRIED UNDER THAT POST!! <33333 but i went back to like read my post twirling my hairs like "omg i love suna so much 🥰" and then reread the post like "OMG HOLD ON WAIT I SAID I DIDN'T CARE ABOUT HIM </3" but he knows i meant well 😔😔 and i corrected it in the end!!

AND I TOTALLY GET IT YOU'RE NOT DRAMATIC AT ALL!! THAT'S HOW I FEEL LIKE 24/7 LIKE YES I'VE BEEN BACK IN SCHOOL FOR A WEEK and still everyday i wake up like "man i am not looking forward to seeing these people today" like they never get better </3 in fact, they get worse 💀 I HOPE YOU HAD A GREAT DAY!!! AND LUCKILY IT'S FRIDAY SO I HOPE YOU HAVE A GOOD WEEKEND AS WELL!! AND GET TO REST A LITTLE BEFORE THIS NEXT WEEK STARTS </3

[kpophubb]

Hi lovely ☀ I'm so happy to hear from you, this week I was literally checking your Tumblr five times per day with my tags. I miss you so much and this week I also needed you so much, but it's okay💛 I'm so sad that you are sick😿😿 I thought you recovered but you mentioned that you don't feel good and I'm just so sad about this(((

Honestly this week I have my period, and I have to take 💊 every single day because it's just so painful 😔so I think we could have some sick party together😹

I had an exam last week which I failed, but I was so confident but I failed and my manager was so stressful and is pressuring me so much😮‍💨🤕🥴

How were your weekends? Today is Sunday and I just don't feel anything ...tomorrow I have to start work again and it's not tomorrow even it's like in 6 hours(((

Today I talked to my grandma and the second time during this 10 months and she's not doing good and mental health is bad she's pretty messed up 😣😭I'm watching this one movie now and it just reminds me of some Horrors that have been through and how lucky I am to actually Escape. ironically the movie is called No Escape. The movie is so well done tho 😭😭💔😢🥺

I Never thought these things would ever happen to me.. or would ever happen in my reality 😔😔I am just so shocked that this happened and they're still consequences and I just don't want to be a part of this you know❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹💔 I wish all of this was just a nightmare and I wake up tomorrow and everything is like before

I actually wanted to send you a short message just wish you could have happy Monday and better week 😭😢🥺🥺🥺💛💛

Stay strong baby I am just so thankful that you exist thank you for all the love you give me💛

Thank you for hyunnies gifs and quotes 🤗💗 I miss you so badly

You probably have no idea and will never understand the way you helped me during this sickness period of my life😔❤️‍🩹💗 thank you so much for saving your hyunnie lixie. Please get well soon

🐁

Hi hi hi my love 🥺🤍 tumblr has been mean to me with my other asks since they crash when I make em too long (?) and can��t be edited later so here we go!😭 keeping it short but ilysm 💗 and value every little bit u say ~

First of all don’t worry about me, I’m doing better now altho I skipped my medication yesterday bc I thought I got better but apparently it made my sickness worse and took away my good night’s sleep 💔 but anyway I’m mentally active now..how are you feeling baby?:( is your period pain GONE?? I’m so sorry for being ia I’m here now promise ☀️💛🫂

The movie seems so strong..and really pain invoking and lesson learning is it on Netflix? If so, I’d love to watch while trying to understand you..

Aah it’s getting hectic for you I can say :( no sleep and so much work 😭 but I really hope smh u get a break soon and can rest as much as you need anonie. <3

I can understand about the whole nightmare part. Altho I have not been in such an intense situation like you (that’s why I give it to u always that you’re super strong bc you are my love) but I have had super dark times too and I can relate to that part where I’d be terrified and cry myself to sleep everyday and beg whatever deity was listening to make it better tomorrow and make it all vanish..but everyday I woke up and nothing changed and that made me feel devastated and made me feel like I was better off gone 💔

but I sincerely hope like me a time comes in your life where everyday would feel as good as a dream where you keep wishing you never wake up from the happiness..💖 the things of the past will never really leave u and even tho the shackles are gone someday and you’re free to walk forward, the scary marks will still be there to your feet. But look baby, slowly you’re healing even if it’s at a micro pace, getting a job, connecting w your family member (grandma) and slowly getting up even tho the suffocating feeling still haunts u, it’s slowly leading to a betterment. Like this, I’m sure you will walk towards light, love and happiness soon. Just faith it till u make it okay??

exams Are shitty..and it’s so disappointing to fail after giving your best it’s like realising your best never amounted to anything but hey love remember what I told u? “Human beings are filled w crazy potential even if you feel like u gave your best today you could still wake up tomorrow and try harder.” So keep your chin high, take a deep breath and try hard again. 💘 every success comes with ten failures, remember that.

and lastly I’ll always be here to save u and pull you up just like lixie does for hyunjin. It’s a promise, not a fancy statement. And I keep my words always. I love you sm and I couldn’t add the last quote bc that post isn’t working anymore but it was..

“The world doesn’t matter. YOU matter. 💛☀️..”♡♡

[senbons]

Thoughts on the state of our nation?

i have thoughts and they're not good or happy ones.

under the cut i copied a long text i send to one of my friends from law school earlier this morning. but it's not about the state of our country as much as how I personally am feeling about our country. i worked in politics for one summer and would consider myself very well-informed, but i'm not a political analyst, so know on the outset i am just an american citizen, not a pundit and not an analyst

i sent this text today while in line for coffee:

Yesterday and today I keep waking up multiple times throughout the night and every time I genuinely do have a second before I remember the election. And then I remember it and I feel the crushing weight of what has happened and the fear of what is going to happen. There is a genuine second though where I don't remember it. And then it's like having to learn it all over again. It's so horrifying. It's so much worse for me than 2016 -- and at that time I didn't think anything could be worse. I feel like I'm floundering and I don't know what to do. But all those placations of just keep waking up and keep going and keep fighting are meaningless -- I don't know how I can keep going.

I don't mean those as vague suicide ideations😭 but I do mean them seriously. I just feel like there was NOTHING she could've done. I'm seeing a lot of rhetoric about how she didn't reach out to working class voters or how the Democratic Party abandoned them, and that's so not true. It's not! I listened to all of her speeches, I listened to her schedule every day and saw all the people she was reaching out towards and meeting and she was doing absolutely all of those things. She was giving clarifying policy. She had reasons for changing her stances that made sense and were articulated. When people say she should've had more developed policy etc, they're wrong. None of the things I've seen people say make any sense to me, except that those who didn't vote for her only did so based on racism, misogyny, and misinformation. It might've been subconscious, but it was bigotry nonetheless.

I think why I'm struggling so much too is that because I don't think she did anything WRONG. and I don't see the way forward for the party. I don't see WHAT they can do differently, which is what makes it so scary and makes me feel so untethered. All of those articles about "where to now" and "how we lost" and "how we should approach 28" just feel completely made up to me rn -- like they're just people who have no idea why something happened trying to make justification for it without evidence or proof of that. Like when a girl gets cheated on and then is trying to justify what she did wrong instead of recognizing that it's just him. He's the one who's an asshole. It's just HIM.

OK, sorry for my long rambling. I could be totally wrong, and I am not a political analyst, but this is what I'm feeling right now, and it is completely unmoored and depressed. Thank you for listening! Feel free to ignore 😂😂😭😭😭😭😭😭

----

^that was the initial text i sent and i keep going back to it because it says (with more detail) what i've been trying to express to everyone for two days.

after the sanders' letter came out, i disagreed with it. bernie underperformed kamala in vermont. it's not about progressivism or policy. Biden was the most pro-labor president since fdr. He flooded the working class with funding. Yeah voters were not aware or informed of these policies bc messaging consistently gets stuck. But, more importantly, they only get misinformation and… idk? Don’t care enough to learn more? Because when you look at ALL the blind policy polling – ALL OF IT – kamala’s platform always got majority majority support by HUGE margins in every blind poll.

and in the end where i can't stop struggling is -- look, separate from the policy or political consequences or legal or constitutional issues or anything about that... listen to him speak. what he says. the way he talks about people. the way he talks to people. that is where is can't handle anything and feel like an udderless ship drifting into oblivion without a way forward: because people can listen to that and... want it. they want it.

she was a great candidate. she did every single thing correctly. it was misinformation and bigotry

ALL I can say is the ONLY thing I think the democratic part could have done differently is run a white man

[bluesandboos]

HI THAT ANON WAS ME i have no idea why i sent it on anon actually 😭

I LOVE the long posts so this will probably be long as well <3 waking up to muchachos sounds like the best thing ever omg DONT APOLOGIZE FOR YOUR SCREAMING I WAS DOING THE SAME AT HOME OMG i kept seeing videos of people at those screens, i cant imagine what it was like to actually be there 😭 the baby in front of you sleeping through the whole thing 😭❤️

i have no memories period of di maria's goal i was literally floating my way through that match and i will NEVER sit through it fully again (except certain parts obv)

that song's this one! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YTnRlJTusME it's prob my favorite tbh it's just so catchy!!

I literally don't remember that save either, everyone was talking about it afterwards but my hands were literally still shaking from the match in general, i saw it on instagram. i don't even remember most of the shootout but SOMOS TODOS MONTIEL I DIDNT EVEN KNOW WHAT IT MEANT AND IT STILL GAVE ME CHILLS THE FIRST TIME I HEARD IT

going to gardens and getting only honking sounds about right and a very specific, but no less valid vibe of its own 👍 literally every time i see pictures or videos of the celebrations, even now, i am in actual awe over the amount of people that turned out and celebrated (obviously lol) before the parade even and even more during it!! someone told me the dibu burger is actually super good, im genuinely dying to try it it looks great 😭 that image is so funny though, argentina won the wc and people are lining up to buy the dibu's burger as they should!! the store owners were either worried about crowds or they shut down to go celebrate themselves lbr 💀

the newspaper!!! gloria eterna thats beautiful stuff!!!! and the goat chips omg, pls dont apologize i am loving the visual aspect of this i've been watching celebration videos non-stop bc i watched so many after they won that its all my instagram recommendations show me anymore. https://mobile.twitter.com/PLF_2008/status/1606926273833467905 this is my favorite <3

i'm so glad you had fun it seems like such a surreal experience and thank you so much for these answers and videos!!!!❤️

OMG HI HI HI thank you for enjoying my rambles <3333 it was so nice to go through it all again, ugh i miss it so much

the baby was built different. i KNOW he's gonna hear it when he gets older about how he fell asleep during the 2022 wc final when argentina became campion del mundo. literally the greatest match of all time and he knocked.

di maria's goal, once i re-watched the highlights and actually registered what was happening, is literally the sexiest thing i've ever seen. the loss of possession, the build up, the quick passes. A TEAM GOAL FR. but whenever i re-watch highlights i can only watch argentina's goals. i have to fast-forward through the penalties that france gets and mbappe's goal; it upsets me too much lmao

also after di maria's goal, people were chanting his name and the camera's were showing how he was crying after he scored and i was just so happy for him <333 also afterwards, I read this article (https://www.theplayerstribune.com/articles/angel-di-maria-argentina-english) and it just made me even more happy that he got a goal in a wc final + won the wc.

ole ole ola is a BANGER omg argentines only coming up with bangers confirmed ty for the link :))

i ended up getting a dibu burger at the airport!!! 10/10 would eat again, my man dibu only comes out with quality content, on and off the pitch.

ppl were wasted af lmao one drunk man came up to my dad (who does not speak a lick of spanish) and was literally in tears trying to hug him and my dad was just like "sir, it's okay, you won, it's okay" (in english, mind you)

for real though, i legit think about how lucky i was to be there and experience it all every single day. and i get a nice reminder every day because my social media is ALSO ALL FOOTBALL now. my tiktok for you page still shows me edits ("the little boy from rosario" lives rent free in my head) and i obviously have to watch every time. although i can't re-watch the 120' minute save because it literally gives me anxiety that it's going to go in this time (even though it's literally over).

that tweet omg :))) im just so happy not only for the players but for the PEOPLE, the way that they loved that team and suffered through all the finals and losses. no one else deserved it more. i love seeing the abuelas dancing in the street and the songs about them- makes me so happy :)

it was so surreal. top memory of life. thank you again for asking and sitting through my rambles and content dump <3

[muertawrites]

I don’t even know if your requests are open or closed,, so if they’re closed you can just ignore this☹️

So,, hear me out — it was present day, 2022, and Eddie and Y/n’s grandchild(ren) find photos of Eddie and Y/n in the 80’s, and Eddie and Y/n’s child, their mom, catches them looking at their parents photos, and when Eddie and Y/n find out about this, they offer to show their grandchild(ren) more photos.

I need some Eddie fluff,, sO😭 YEAHHH. anyway,, have a great day/night ily/p — 🦔 (call me hedgehog anon😁bc i love hedgehogs fr)

i am screaming. i am crying. i am puking up blood at how unbearably ADORABLE THIS REQUEST IS how dare you make me face my romanticism and sentimentality

i'm going to write this as just a headcanon bc if i think about it too hard i might actually shatter my own heart. i'm also gonna tweak the family setup a lil bit.

so like

let's talk about eddie in his 50s

that man's a silver fox. kept his long hair and totally metal wardrobe. aged to perfection. still a massive ball of unchecked chaotic good. owns a music shop and rides a motorcycle.

and of course he's still head over heels in love with you. every day he wakes up next to you and is like "that's my person. the most beautiful person in the entire world. i am so lucky <3". like he still gets butterflies around you. you've been married for 20 years but he still writes you notes like "will you go out with me yes or no"

and hey let's talk about that marriage!

it was not planned

you were perfectly happy living in a domestic partnership and not getting the law involved

until you both royally fucked up and he got you pregnant

and this poor man was terrified when you found out. not because he didn't think he could be a dad, but because he was afraid you were gonna leave him. you told him you didn't want kids and he went and did the big dumb and didn't use a condom. but he reminded you repeatedly that it was your body and he didn't care what you did, he would still love you and support you and be there through all of it.

but you actually decided... hey. if i'm gonna have a baby, eddie's the only baby daddy i could ever want. so you told him you wanted to be a family.

and he immediately proposed.

so fast forward to today. it's 2022, and your now full-grown baby is headed off to college. she's nervous as hell. so you pull out the shoebox full of photos of you and eddie when you were her age to help reassure her.

the first ones are just goofy ones, back from before you and eddie started dating. pictures from the road trip you guys took when he drove you to college, standing in front of his van packed with your stuff. pictures from parties you went to together, drunkenly laughing with plastic cups in hand. polaroids and letters you sent back and forth to each other, unable to talk about anything more than how much you miss each other.

the next ones you show her are of your pregnancy and her birth. eddie kissing your growing bump. standing with his arms wrapped around you in front of the house you bought. sleeping in a chair in the hospital with a bundle of blankets in his arms, thick tufts of black hair peeking out the top. uncles dustin and steve huddled around her, staring at her with massive grins on their faces. wayne sitting with her at his kitchen table, eddie at his side and both smiling adoringly down at her.

then there are the ones from her childhood, the ones she remembers. sitting on eddie's lap while he teaches her guitar. getting carried on his shoulders at her first metallica concert. giggling at the funny voices and faces he made while reading to her. asleep in the back seat of his van, curled up with the stuffed dragon she's had since she was a baby.

eddie making devil horns with her to celebrate her spelling bee win.

you braiding her unruly curls for her middle school graduation.

you and eddie hugging her in a sandwich on the night of junior prom, forcing her date to take the photo (not pictured is the very long, very menacing lecture eddie gave the poor boy, even though he was just taking her as a friend. it worked though - he got her home an hour before curfew.)

"... you didn't want a kid, right?" she asks. "how did... how did you do it?"

you sigh, pulling her in close.

"it was terrifying," you admit. "but... i had your dad. we had each other. and we had everyone else in the family with us, too. none of it has ever been easy, but it's all been so much better because we're surrounded by people who love us, and we love you more than anything. and that's what you've got to focus on. the good things will make you strong enough to kick the bad things in the teeth."

"hey, that's not how i taught her to fight," eddie chimes as he enters the room. "kicking teeth is too difficult. you gotta go for an uppercut, jam the fucker's nose into his skull."

he grins and flops down onto the couch beside her, kissing her forehead.

"ready to head out, padawan?"

she nods.

"yeah. i'm actually... i'm really excited!"

as you watch her bound into the back seat of eddie's jeeep, he wraps his arms around your shoulders, hugging you tightly and pressing your back to his chest.

"we made a pretty cool little human," he muses.

"yeah," you agree. "yeah, we really did."