#now I'll go to sleep bc it's 1am

[inkedinshadows]

First requested fic coming on February 1st! I just finished it and as usual I got a bit carried away... three prompts (literally just one sentence each) and I somehow wrote 2.3k words

[kelbunny]

Hi sir, you know your son probably wouldn't have died if you didn't put so many sheer drops all over your castle. I'm just saying.

Also, rude. And Denam is terrifying to fight. Never again please.

(Now my team is slightly different after this bc I had to restart the battle bc I was getting my butt kicked)

I laughed harder than I probably should have when everyone started facing the direction the voice was coming from, regardless of if they were an ally or doppelganger lol.

And despite how rough that fight was, everyone made it out alive. Barely.

You can't hecking do this to me asdfghjkl

Catuia I miss you sm aaaaghhh

He has a crown! At least until he is shot and killed rip, if I'm understanding everything correctly

😌😎

No dying allowed here thank you very much

You don't say lol.

[cryo-and-condescension]

"Hm, how about a cafe or restaurant, my dear?"

Janus had no such restraint, gently nipping at Rook's jaw.

[Rook stumbled into Janus's bedroom, a pained look in his eyes as he sucked in sharp breaths] Monsieur les engelures, are you in here?

[He limped inside, his injury then becoming apparent. His left leg is tangled up in an unfamiliar type of thorn, blood dripping from several small cuts in his skin. While it doesn't look bad on the outside, it's doing something to his nerves. It feels all numb and it's making him dizzy]

@rookonthehunt

"Wh- Rook?" Janus rushed over in moments, holding Rook's face in his hands for a moment before kneeling to examine the wounds.

"What the fuck happened." The half-fae growls, the sound low and entirely unlike the Janus that Rook was used to.

[studentinpursuitofclouds]

Headcanons about the svd and sve Bachelor(ette)s discovering the farmer will always sleep until the next day 6am on the dot no matter what?

Bc finding out your spouse will is both capable of sleeping from 1am to 6am and 7am to next day 6am and passing out in the mountains to 6am must be real fun to find out.

If that hasn't been done yet please and maybe thank you <3

Agree, a situation where your spouse can't be woken up before 6am is pretty funny and a good source for a funny headcanon (or even angst). Which, by the way, while writing it gave me another funny thought (maybe I'll write it in the future) - what if we switch roles? Because all bachelors/ettes go to bed at exactly 10 p.m., and you can't get them up again until the next day...

"Hey, Elliott, do you want to watch a movie or do something... more interesting?~"

"Of course, my love, we can-"

*10:00 p.m.*

"Zzzzzzz...."

"....Seriously, Elliott? Elliott?"

Oh well, I got distracted.... 😅 Anyway, thanj you so much for the ask, dear anon! ❤️

_________________________________________

Stardew Valley:

Harvey:

Harvey is already often at the doctor's mode every time he catches his spouse with serious wounds after their adventures, and now there's a new cause for concern. In addition to the fact that Farmer will not wake up before 6 a.m. under any circumstances (which is already a cause for concern, because what if they are somewhere far away, in forest for example?), the fact that because of this peculiarity Harvey's spouse will suffer from either sleep deprivation or oversleeping. And in both cases it has a negative impact on health. That's why the doctor will remind Farmer to go to bed on time and not to overload themself with farm work.

Shane:

Shane didn't pay attention to Farmer's habit at first, because either Shane couldn't get up that early (okay from 7 a.m., but 6 a.m.? Nah...) or he left Farmer to sleep further if he got up earlier than them, because they worked hard and they needed rest, and he went to make breakfast/feed the chickens. Although the moment when his spouse lay down on the couch to take a nap at noon and woke up with 6am the next day already, Shane freaked out, because holy shit he already thought they were sick or worse. Does this have some kind of bad effect on Farmer's health? No? If it's ok, Shane will get used to not being able to wake his spouse up before 6 in the morning pretty quickly.

Elliott:

Farmer got up from the bed and headed toward the kitchen, waiting for their husband Elliott by the coffee machine. But the kitchen was empty, which was odd, since Elliott didn't usually start the morning without cappuccino. Just when they were about to assume where the writer was going, their ginger spouse kicked the door and ran into the house... with Harvey and Maru? "This way, doctor, hurry! Farmer's not feeling well, they won't wake up and they need help right away- Oh..." False alarm... But honestly, Harvey will confirm Elliott's concern: it's really weird that Farmer is in no way awake to all of Elliott's futile attempts. The writer and Farmer will listen to a couple of doctor's advice and get a prescription for some medication. Elliott will make sure his dear spouse goes to bed early so they don't get sleep deprivation and its attendant problems.

Sam:

"Babe. Babe. Baaaaaaabe. Are you awake? Hon. Babe-" Sam had been shaking Farmer for probably ten minutes, but to the musician's surprise, his spouse was sleeping the dead sleep. Which made him a little worried, because.... They don't wake up at all, and- Oh! Farmer mumbled something in their sleep, so at least they're okay. "Babe. Wake up, please. Babe. Baaaaabe-" Though such a deep sleep was still stressing Sammy out a little bit. After half an hour, Farmer stopped making any sounds at all, but as soon as the six a.m. alarm clock went off, Farmer abruptly opened his eyes. "Good morning, Sammy~" "I thought you were dead." "Wha...?" Well, Farmer would agree with their spouse - If the roles were reversed, they'd be worried too.

Alex:

Tired, Farmer wrapped themself in a blanket on the couch and fell asleep at 4:00 p.m. Alex, who found them in such a position, left the kiss and went to prepare dinner for two. The food was ready, and the athlete went to wake up his spouse. Woke him up for about ten minutes, no effect. From that he started calling Harvey in a panic, and when Farmer was taken away, he was sitting not far from the emergency room where Farmer was lying. He refused to go home, and while the doctor spent the whole night trying to wake Farmer up and wanted to call Zuzu hospital, Farmer got up at six in the morning sharp. Yoba, Alex cried and hugged the confused Farmer, who did not understand why the spouse was sobbing, why Harvey was lying unconscious and how they ended up in the clinic.

Sebastian:

Though outwardly Sebastian was calm, his heart was beating quite fast from worry. He was a bit nervous, for he had never before encountered a heavy sleeper like Farmer. Sebby could easily be wakened by a rustle, but his love did not care at all about external sounds, even if a meteorite fell, they would not wake up. But at least they breathe and sniffle, that's good. He looked at his spouse for a long time, until he had fallen asleep himself, and now Farmer was looking at his slightly asleep husband. "Did you not sleep well, Sebby?" "....You could say that." He would ask Farmer to consult a doctor about it, because it... wasn't exactly normal.

Penny:

Penny's first encounter with such a peculiarity of her spouse did not go very smoothly, to say the least, as she stood crying by the bedside, vainly waking up Farmer and thinking that they had died or fallen into a coma. Imagine Farmer's face who woke up at exactly six in the morning from a sweet dream, and instead of their wife's warm smile and the smell of fresh coffee saw a sobbing Penny with the phone in her hands, calling Harvey for help. The conversation will be awkward, and Penny will rightly be angry, because she should be warned about this, but quickly adjusts to such a strange Farmer's habit. Though she'll still periodically check to see if they're breathing, just to reassure that everything's okay.

Abigail:

Abigail used to think that her Farmer was just a very deep sleeper, as she usually didn't take long attempts to wake up her spouse, leaving them to dream further, and went to do her own thing without Farmer's help. But the violet-haired girl began to notice this sort of thing more often. On one such night, she decided to test her little theory - Abby lightly shaked them, tickled them, tried to call to them (loudly), even put ice on their hand/leg/stomach - to no avail, they lay still like log, and only sniffled quietly. "You really are a deep sleeper until 6:00 a.m., like wow!" Abby shared her thoughts the next morning with Farmer, and she sounded more like admiration than concern.

Maru:

When the rooster crowed at exactly six in the morning, Farmer stretched sweetly and turned around to where Maru should be lying. Only instead of a sleeping wife or an empty seat (when she gets up early and makes breakfast), Maru was looking directly at her spouse, with notepad and pen in hand. "Hey darling, did you sleep well?" "Did you sleep well?" Judging by the heavy sigh and bags across Maru's eyes, apparently not. The young inventor noticed this strange pattern and decided to test her theory. They do indeed always get up at 6am, no matter what time they went to bed. It's very interesting! ...Although she admits that it was kinda strange to watch Farmer like that, and plus she was getting sleep deprived.

Haley:

Well, Haley hadn't noticed it at first, for at least she'd adapted to farm life, but getting up at six in the morning, seriously? People are still in bed at that time. But later, she caught this unusual phenomenon when Farmer lay down to rest for a couple hours at noon, but slept through all the plans they and their beloved wife wanted to make for the evening. Haley herself sleeps about 10 hours a night, but 18? And her spouse was impossible to wake up with anything. Nothing works, at all. The next morning she'll be a little passive-aggressive that the promised date got derailed, but she'll also be concerned because somehow this is kinda weird. Maybe they should see a doctor.

Emily:

"Thank Yoba! I was already afraid you wouldn't wake up!" The first words Farmer heard after waking up caused them to rise abruptly and look around their surroundings. Hmm, strange, they're not in a clinic, nor are they on the first level of the Mines. They're fine, and only a sad and worried Emily was standing around. "I heard some sort of scratching outside the front door and I wanted you to check, but there was no way to wake you up, and I was starting to get scared-" Oops... Farmer forgot to mention that they don't get up until after 6am, and there's no way to wake them up. Yeah, it's a weird peculiarity, but that's the way it is. At least with Farmer it's okay, so Emily relaxed a bit. But Farmer themself is worried: if they don't get up before 6 am, how to help their wife if someone, Yoba forbid, gets into the house...?

Leah:

In the first time this happened, Leah naturally freaked out when Farmer didn't wake up after a long sleep/consciousness in the Mines (just tired and collapsed from exhaustion, not wounds). And then it happened again. And again. And again, and again, and again. Until, annoyed by Farmer's disregard for their own health, the artist picked up a sculpted hammer and threatened it at the Farmer's face. "You know, I understand you have this thing with sleep, but that doesn't mean you need make it worse. Dear spouse, go to bed on time, or else..." Farmer did not want to know what would happened after "or else...", so they listened to their strict but caring wife and started to go to bed on time. And at home, not in Mines/Skull Cavern (...in most cases).

Stardew Valley Expanded:

Magnus Rasmodius:

Magnus would at first think that some kind of curse (from his ex-wife) had been cast on his spouse, or that his own spell, which he usually casts on Farmer for protection, had given strange side effects. But after checking, he found nothing life-threatening - Farmer is always up at six in the morning no matter what, and the effects of magic are nowhere to be found. Unusual, but Farmer themself are quite an unusual person, as is Rasmodius himself. There will, of course, be worries in case Magnus' beloved spouse inadvertently falls asleep or passes out in a dangerous place, but it's nothing that enchanted artifacts or spells can't solve.

Victor:

Perhaps Victor would not have been so frightened by the first encounter with such a peculiarity of his spouse, if it had not been for a series of previous events. Victor didn't know that Farmer didn't get up until 6:00 a.m. His spouse had returned from their adventure complaining that they had bumped their head a little when falling from a height. No serious wounds, and Farmer checked with the doctor, ok. Farmer was still complaining of a headache, and decided to take a half hour nap, ok. Victor wakes Farmer after two hours of sleep, for dinner. They don't wake up. The spaghetti lover's first thought is that the head injury turned out to be much more serious... Which is why Victor immediately sounds the alarm and calls Harvey. The next morning Farmer wakes up as if nothing had happened ("Wait, is that clinic?"), but Victor insists that more tests must be done. He's worried, alright?

Lance:

Hmm, pretty unusual, and... Lance is getting a little worried about this information. His spouse is telling him in direct text that if they fall asleep or pass out, they will not, under any circumstances, wake up before 6am the next morning. And if Farmer for some reason decides to spend the night in a tent near a place swarming with monsters or wild beasts, or collapses from exhaustion in the same forest or other, not too safe place... The pink-haired adventurer knows that his beloved Farmer can take care of themself, but will still either recommend going on adventures with him (or Marlon), or find a solution to this problem in magic (instant travel artifacts if Farmer starts to fall asleep/lose consciousness, or something like that).

Sophia:

Sophia's first assumption when she couldn't wake her spouse was that they had fallen into a coma, and in a fit of panic, she tearfully began calling Dr. Harvey, Maru, Gus - anyone who could help Farmer in any way. Those who arrived had already brought a stretcher to lay Farmer down and take them to the clinic, but as soon as it hit 6 a.m., they quietly opened their eyes.... and were stunned by the change of scenery. Why are they on a stretcher? Gus, Harvey? What's goin- Sophia, why are you crying? The pink-haired girl will insist on visiting Harvey to see if her spouse is okay. Yes, the habit is strange, but it doesn't affect Farmer's health, except that it is necessary to go to bed on time and preferably at home (at least in the Pelican Town where there are people). Sophia checks them before they go to bed anyway to make sure everything is okay. That incident scared her terribly.

Claire:

"Dear, don't you think this is a little strange? Do you always get up at this hour?" Claire asked the question casually, since although her spouse was fine and had no health complaints/sleep problems, such a strange coincidence couldn't help but go unnoticed by her. If Farmer replied that they woke up like this, at six a.m. sharp, precisely after they moved to Stardew Valley, Claire would be a little concerned. Maybe.... Farmer should watch their sleep schedule and lighten the adventures duties? She's just being caring and wants to make sure they're okay and it's not detrimental to their health.

Scarlett:

Scarlett noticed that Farmer got up at a certain time, although at first her theory was a bit wrong. She thought that her dearest spouse wakes up only after the rooster call only, which usually crowed closer to 6 am. So Scarlett decided to test her little theory by letting Copper (their rooster) into the bedroom at half past six in the morning. The proud bird immediately started his wake up song, but Farmer was deed asleep. But when the clock had already struck exactly six, they got out of bed. "Good morning, dear- Why is our rooster in the bedroom?" "Oh, we just testing a theory." Kinda strange, but if Farmer's health wasn't threatened by this, Scarlett would be relatively calm.

Olivia:

Olivia didn't just call a local doctor and his assistant - the former Joja accountant started calling all the professional doctors she knew from Zuzu city, worryingly describing the symptoms and the condition of her spouse who was still asleep. Farmer woke up yesterday, went to couch for an hour nap at 11am and still hasn't woken up! Olivia is in a panic, and while Harvey tries to sort out Farmer's condition, she runs back and forth with her phone. Waking up already in the room, Farmer will be in complete shock, to say the least, to see a whole bunch of doctors examining them. Olivia's spouse is fine, but they're both definitely not leaving the clinic until the doctors' verdict. And if Farmer had warned her about this 'peculiarity'...

[savventeen]

you say the stupidest (sweetest) things

pairing: seungkwan x gn!reader rating: 16+ (for swearing) wc: 4.5k prompt: seungkwan + "things you said at 1am" summary: you say stupid shit on the best of days, so when seungkwan comes over when you're having a bad bout of insomnia, the last thing he expects to hear from you is an accidental love confession warnings: insomnia, mental health issues, dissociation mention tags: fluff, friends to lovers, first kiss, reader is a little unhinged but who isn't tbh, they're also highkey allergic to genuine expressions of love/affection but they're working on it, banter, stimming, wrestling like children to try and work through emotions, reader is some flavor of lgbt+ (they make an "i've never done anything straight in my life" joke), reader's pov is dramatic bc they're dramatic oops a/n: this is for @dokyeomin as a part of my emergency commissions (check out the post here) and this was only supposed to be 1k but it 100% got away from me... i hope you still enjoy the fluff and all of the attached nonsense <3

From: Y/n 🔪 [11:47pm]

yo kwannie if i impulsively decide to go to the 24h convenience store how harshly do u think they'll jusdge me for buying every flavor of gummy candy available *judge i wanna see if i can melt them down into one Ultimate Gummy u know for Science

Seungkwan pauses brushing his teeth and stares down at your messages.

To be fair, it's probably not the strangest thing you've ever texted him. He's known you since your second year of college, after all, so he has about half a decade of experience with all of your various y/n-isms under his belt now.

Which is how he knows to trust his gut when it tells him that this probably isn't your usual brand of nonsense.

He spits the toothpaste into the sink and dials your number. You answer on the second ring.

“Before you say anything,” you start, “I was only half-serious about the gummies thing. Like, it's a fun idea, you know? In theory. But in actuality? I do not want to deal with the mess that it would create. Or the smells. Well, the smells might actually be pretty good depending on—“

“Uh-huh,” he interrupts dryly. “Y/n, when's the last time you slept?”

The beat of silence that follows is enough to confirm his suspicions, and the hesitant “Um” that follows is just the icing on the cake, really.

He sighs. “The fact that you have to think about it says enough.”

“I don’t need to think about it,” you argue petulantly. “I just… don’t wanna tell you.”

“Y/n...” he groans, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Look, I know, I'm sorry.” And you do sound a little bit sorry, at least. “I'm just. Having an episode. Don't worry about it.”

His shoulders droop as the words sink in. “Episodes” are what you've taken to calling your intermittent bouts of serious insomnia.

Generally speaking, you sleep about as well as the average twenty-something with a caffeine addiction. But every few months or so, it's like your brain completely forgets how to shut off and you end up staying awake for 40+ hours straight.

“Well,” he says, putting his toothbrush away and going back to his bedroom. “You know that ship has sailed, right? You know I'm gonna worry about it.”

Your deep sigh crackles over the line. “Yeah, I know.”

“So. Where're we at this time?”

He mentally braces himself. The two of you have done this enough times now that he knows that you know there's no point in trying to lie or beat around the bush.

“Uhhhhhhh, I'll be hitting the 46-hour mark in about 20 minutes.”

“Aish.”

The fact that you can say that so casually makes his heart hurt. He knows that whenever he doesn't get enough sleep, he makes sure everyone knows it and thus babies him accordingly. But you've always been so intent on hiding anything and everything you struggle with. It's taken years for him to bully himself past the walls you keep hidden behind shit-eating grins and an over-willingness to help.

“Okay,” he says, moving to the dresser to grab an extra set of clothes. “I'll be over in an hour.”

“Wait. What?”

“You heard me.” He tosses the clothes onto his bed before going to grab one of his duffle bags, firmly asserting, “You've got an hour to mentally prepare yourself for my arrival.”

“Honey, you've got a big storm comin',” you quote at him without hesitating.

“You sure do,” he assures with a snort. “Better get ready to feel the wrath of my friendship.”

“Why do you have to love so aggressively?”

He rolls his eyes while he throws his clothes into the duffle bag with one hand. “Because it's the only way you'll accept it, idiot.”

“No, it isn't.”

Your pout is so audible through the phone that Seungkwan has to stop and glance at the screen in disbelief.

“Y/n. Y/n L/n. Do not stand there and lie to my face like that.”

“I'm not lying!”

“Not—” He gesticulates wildly with one hand like he's going Can you believe this shit? to an invisible TV audience. “Okay, tell me this: what did you do the last time I sincerely monologued at you about how much you mean to me as a friend, hmm? No bits, no bullshit, just me telling you how much I love you and how amazing you are.”

A beat. “I'll hang up on you, Kwannie, don't test me.”

He barely resists the urge to shove his face into the bedspread and scream. “You're literally proving my point right now!”

“Kwannieeee,” you whine, because you know he's right.

“Also, because I'm never letting you live it down, I will remind you exactly what you did."

You say his name again, but it's muffled, and he assumes it's because you're hiding your face in shame.

“I gave you a sincere, heartfelt speech about how much your friendship has changed my life for the better and made me become a better person—” he ignores your wordless pterodactyl screech, “—and how do you respond? By staring at me like a deer caught in the headlights, slowly raising your arms to give me double finger guns, winking, and then slowly backing out of the room like an awkward mannequin!”

“...”

“Well?” He puts his free hand on his hip. “Do you have anything to say for yourself?”

“… I’ve changed a lot since then.”

Seungkwan rolls his eyes before moving to continue packing his overnight bag. “It was literally three months ago.”

“Yeah, and? Doesn't change the fact that I've changed,” you assert.

“Into even more of a nuisance? Yes, you're absolutely right.” He smiles when he hears you scoff playfully.

“Listen here, Boo Seungkwan. You know that well-rested Y/n is ready to throw down with you at a moment's notice. What do you think sleep-deprived, zero-impulse-control Y/n is going to do the second you get to their front door?”

“Stop referring to themself in the third person, hopefully,” he mutters, finally zipping up his bag and heading to the door. “And then after that, they're going to let me bully them into resting.”

“Hmm. The council has heard your proposal, briefly pondered it, and deemed it “unnecessary” on the basis of: they're a bad bitch that can't be stopped by neither time nor physics nor any god of your choosing.”

Seungkwan scoffs as he puts the call on speaker and sits to put on his sneakers. “Well, “the council” can go fuck right off.”

“What if the council would like to fuck right on?”

Pausing in the middle of tying his laces, he blinks down at his phone. “I'm— what?”

“Okay, real talk, what do you think it would mean in this case? Like, would this be like a 'hop on' versus 'hop off' situation? Or more like an 'I'm down for this' versus 'I'm up for this' kinda situation? Because it would have very different outcomes depending.”

Seungkwan decides that this is a debate better left for another time. “I think it means that I'm going to be at your house soon and that if you're not in your pajamas with hot Sleepy Time tea and the series Planet Earth ready to go, there will be consequences.”

“Booooooo, you whore.”

He finishes tying his laces and jabs his finger at the phone. “Consequences, Y/n.”

“Ugh, fine.”

“See you soon, love you, bye.” He hangs up before you can get another word in, but doesn't move from his seated position in the entryway.

Slowly, he takes a deep breath in and lets it out, taking a moment to lean back on his hands while he stares at the back of his front door. Specifically, at the large collage of sticky notes and pictures and doodles that have taken up residence there.

A few of the notes are ones he's gotten from other members of your shared friend group over the years (the one from Chan that reads "if u eat my rice i'll eat ur kneecaps xoxo" hangs proudly in the center, right next to a picture of him sleeping that Seungkwan managed to capture from an extremely unflattering angle). But most of them are from you.

Dumb puns, meme references, bullshit animal facts you made up just to get him to laugh… almost all of them are stupid in that extremely charming way that only you somehow manage to pull off.

But the one he's staring at now is almost completely hidden by other notes and pictures that have been added to the collage. It's a pale blue, the ink starting to fade a bit with time — the first note you ever gave him, back when you two were just people who happened to sit next to each other in an astronomy class.

Even though most of it is hidden, he doesn't need to be able to see all the tiny words you crammed into the small space to already know exactly what it says.

how do u make a space party? u planet :P u looked sad today, hope this makes u feel a little better also if this is 2 forward feel free 2 pretend i don't exist. or punt me in2 the sun idk u'd be doing me a favor tbh

He'd almost skipped class that day because of how bad he'd been feeling, but he'd decided to try and push through. And before that day, neither of you had interacted with more than a polite greeting and the occasional question about the homework.

But then you'd passed him that note, and he'd passed one back that said “that's dumb. but thank you” with a smiley face, and you'd passed another one back that said “do u think lizard people have ever been to space?” and the rest, they say, is history.

Seungkwan shakes his head with a sigh before standing up and grabbing his bag and his keys, striding determinedly out the door. He's got a best friend to take care of.

Seungkwan should be at your place soon, and you're not quite sure what to do in the meantime.

You have your laptop hooked up to the monitor in the living room with Planet Earth queued up, you have the kettle filled with water and ready to go on the stove, and you have mugs and teabags ready on the counter next to it.

The Required Tasks™️ have been completed as much as possible without the arrival of your best friend, and now all that's left to do is wait.

Which, normally, you're not the worst at. You're excellent at entertaining yourself, actually, mostly because there's always something to think about. Whether it be about cute dogs that you've seen over the past week (I wonder if the pomeranian down the street will let me pet him next time), potential plot twists for the new fantasy drama you're a little bit obsessed with (what if Gregothy was cursed the whole time???), or generic ponderings of the human existence as a whole (do souls have the metaphysical equivalent of a fingerprint?), you're pretty much always thinking about something.

Which is totally fine and dandy and cool or whatever when you have the ability to, you know, shut it off. For example, when you need to do something simple and necessary like, oh I don't know, go the fuck to sleep.

You also hate when that manic mental energy somehow translates into kinetic energy as well. It makes you feel like a hamster in a cage, watching yourself running and running and running on that stupid wheel until you exhaust yourself.

Tonight's metaphorical wheel: stimming like wild in the kitchen. Flapping, rocking, (gently) slapping, making weird and fun mouth sounds, the whole shebang.

And again, normally stimming is fun. Stimming is great. But stimming because you feel like if you don't stop moving you're going to literally vibrate out of your skin is, to put it lightly, Not It.

It takes you about ten minutes to work out all of the energy until you no longer feel like your blood was replaced with pop rocks.

With a groan, you lower yourself to the kitchen floor and lay down face first. Because despite how exhausted you feel in every possible way, there's still something like an itch in your conscious, a fucking pea underneath the miles of mattresses that refuse to let you just. Fucking. Sleep.

Your pity party must've lasted longer than you realized (or, more likely, you dissociated for a hot second there) because suddenly someone's knocking at your door at the same time you get a text from Seungkwan.

And you know it's a text from Seungkwan specifically because you got Vernon to help you change your notification settings so that whenever Seungkwan texts you, the "i love you.. bitch" sound clip plays instead of a normal text tone.

For a fraction of a second, you contemplate slowly inching your way to the door like an uncoordinated caterpillar, but you swat the thought aside like you’re swatting a gnat and you awkwardly roll to your feet and make your way to your front door.

Without hesitating, you unlock the door, swinging it open with a flourish and sticking a finger right in Seungkwan's face before he can utter a single syllable, forcing him to cross his eyes.

You open your mouth wide like you're going to say something, pause for a moment, then tap your pointed finger to his nose with a quiet "boop."

He blinks, expression turning deadpan, and sighs. "I should have expected this, honestly."

“Yep!”

You let him into your apartment, and he makes himself right at home, mildly bitching at you as he goes to get the tea ready, and something within you shifts.

The inside of your head is still a bit of a dumpster fire, unfortunately, but inside your chest... something clicks into place that you're not sure that you're ready to name. Whatever it is, though, it's soft and warm and kinda feels like your heart is being hugged.

Smiling to yourself, you follow him into the kitchen.

💤 💤 💤 💤 💤

It was pretty much straight to “business” after that, and it only takes Seungkwan one cup of tea and two episodes listening to David Attenborough's dulcet narrations for him to knock right out, leaning heavily against your shoulder on the couch.

Which means it's now the perfect time to sit there and Admire Your Bro™️.

It's rare to see him so still, you think. He's an active guy, in pretty much every sense of the word, and you always feel a little honored when you get to be witness to his quiet, vulnerable moments like this one.

He looks so serene, face smoothed out and painted in soft twirling shades of blue from the screen of the monitor, though you can't see too much of it from this angle. Mostly you just see his cheeks and stupidly adorable button nose.

And you've seen the same thing a million times before — in all kinds of states and expressions — and despite how much you've tried to ignore it, each and every time you've caught yourself noticing just how cute Seungkwan is, it's caused that thing in your heart to scrunch up, full of the L-word feeling that you've kept unnamed for what feels like forever now.

Except, maybe that thing in your heart is tired of scrunching up. Maybe it's decided that it's tired of forever.

Maybe that thing has finally decided to burrow itself out of the walls you've built up because you find yourself finally allowing yourself to think, Holy shit, I think I'm in love with you.

You don't realize that Seungkwan has completely stilled against you, but you certainly notice when he suddenly throws himself forward so he can turn around and stare at you incredulously. Only he overshoots a little bit and ends up falling off the couch with a squawk and a dramatic flail.

"Oh my god, Kwannie are you okay?!"

He stares at you from where he fell, wide-eyed like you've grown a second head or like the time you'd tried to convince him that birds weren't real and actually just a government conspiracy.

"Am— am I okay? No??"

Now it's your turn to move off of the couch, coming down to his level to see if maybe he hurt himself when he fell. "Fuck, okay, did you hit something? Do you need an icepack?"

Seungkwan being Not Okay is maybe one of the worst things that could ever happen in the entire universe and you're trying not to panic as you reach out to check for injuries.

"No, no, stop—" he bats away at your hands and you stop in your motions, now kneeling in front of him. "I'm not hurt!"

Your brain does the cartoonish screech thing as it comes to a halt, and you furrow your brows. "But.. you just said you're not okay?"

"I'm not!" His eyes are still wide in shock, but he also looks confused and maybe a little bit like he's about to cry?

Oh no. If he cries and it's somehow your fault (because it has to somehow be your fault) you think the world might actually end.

"Okay, uh. I am— confused,” you start, sure you must look as lost as you feel. “But, um, what can I do to help?"

He swallows, and a part of you realizes that he's looking at you with an expression you've never seen before. "Did you mean it?"

Knowing that it's significant but not yet knowing why, you maintain eye contact. "Mean what?"

"What you just said."

You blink. "...that I'm confused?"

He shakes his head. "No, before that."

You have a hard time remembering what you just said when you're not sleep-deprived and worried you've just somehow accidentally caused irreparable emotional damage to your best friend. "Uh... when I asked if you were okay?"

"No, fuck," and it's a shock for some reason, hearing him cuss right now. You hear him say much worse things all the time, but you think it might be the way he said it — with a kind of desperate vulnerability that you're not sure you've ever heard from him before.

That thing in your chest twinges and you think maybe you're the one who's gonna start crying.

He says your name like a plea, and then he's on his knees right in front of where you're kneeling on the floor, reaching forward to cup your face in his palms. "You said— Y/n, you said "holy shit I think I'm in love with you.””

Oh.

You're pretty sure your heart falls right out of your ass and bounces across the rug, judging from the way it comes to a dead stop. You blink at him. Full of new and sinking kind of dread, you whisper, "...I said that out loud?"

He laughs, but it's tinged with incredulity and sounds a little too close to a sob for comfort. "Yes! You did!"

And wait, no, your heart is still stuck in your chest, because you can feel it start pounding against your ribcage in double, triple, quadruple time. He must see the fear in your expression, because suddenly his eyes are narrowed in a determined scowl and he growls, "Oh no you don't."

Then you find yourself going down with a yelp as Seungkwan octopuses himself around you, trapping you within the confines of his surprisingly strong arms and legs as he basically tackles you to the floor.

You try and wiggle away even as you know it's useless, and he grits, "Y/n dammit, answer my question."

"Why were you even awake?” You deflect, getting an arm free and trying to give him a wedgie. “You were supposed to be asleep!"

"I was supposed to be asleep?!” He screeches, easily evading your reach and poking your ribs to get you to reflexively pull back your arm. “You're the one who hasn't slept in literal days! And stop avoiding my question!"

"No!" He has you trapped once again, and you resort to licking his arm.

"Oh my god!"

He muffles his scream into your shoulder, long and frustrated, and then he just... goes limp. He loosens his hold and just lets his full body weight kinda crush the parts of you he's ended up lying on and just... lays there.

This is your chance, you know — to wiggle free and escape and run away from your feelings just like you always have.

But, for some reason, you don't — that scrunched-up thing in your chest holds you back. You stay there, lying beneath Seungkwan on the floor of your living room at one-something in the morning, and the two of you just breathe.

"It's okay, you know," he murmurs after a moment, so quiet you barely hear him over David Attenborough still narrating softly in the background. "If you didn't mean it. It's okay."

Holy shit, I think I'm in love with you.

And you realize how easy it would be to play it off, to blame it on the sleep deprivation, the way you blurted it out like that — to say (to lie) you meant it completely platonically, like the way you propose to Mingyu at least once a month when he cooks you all dinner.

And you also realize, quite shockingly, that despite how a part of you still desperately wants to run away, the larger part of you wants to stay. Doesn't want to run. Doesn't want to lie anymore.

You swallow heavily, briefly close your eyes, and take in a deep breath. "And if I did? Mean it?"

This time, you do notice when Seungkwan goes still. Slowly, he lifts his head so he can look you in the eyes.

When he doesn't say anything, just continues to look at you with an unreadable expression, you try to continue.

"Would you— would that— would it be okay? If I meant it? When I— when I said that I'm in love with you? Is— because um, like you said, it's okay if it's not, and uh—"

Your nervous rambling comes to a stop when he once again cups your face, but it's gentler than before, closer to a caress. The whole time you'd been talking he'd been slowly sitting up, and now he's on his knees next to where you're still lying down on the floor, looking down at you like all the hope in the world is somewhere to be found in your expression.

"Y/n." he says your name like it's something precious, and you feel the absurd urge to burst into tears. "It would be very okay." His thumbs make gentle arcs across your cheeks. "And just to be clear: you mean it in a non-platonic sense, right?” He chews on his lip. “Hopefully, in a very much romantic sense?"

Staring at him staring at you, eyes bright with hope and a little bit of wonder... you can only imagine you must be looking at him the same way. Your chest feels like it's full of helium but also like something warm and gooey is sloshing around in there. And all that hope and wonder and holy shit is this actually happening? is causing your tongue to stick to the roof of your mouth, and all you're able to get past your lips is a breathless, "Hopefully?"

"Oh my god," he groans in frustration, but it's light and airy and makes you think of amusement park rides and fairy lights and how you want to annoy the shit out of this man for the rest of his life, if he'll let you. He's shaking his head, smiling, beaming, and he asks, "Why can you never give me any kind of a straight answer, huh?"

"Because it's my life's purpose to be the bane of your existence until the day we die," you say, reaching up to hold his face too. "Also because I've never done anything straight ever in my life."

And then your body is moving before your brain can think it though, dragging him down until you can press your lips to his and finally, finally know what it's like to kiss Boo Seungkwan.

He makes a little noise of surprise, one that you can feel buzz against your lips before he melts into you. And oh, any thoughts you might have had are forcefully ejected from your brain because all you can focus on are his lips pressed to yours, the way they move slowly, gently, turning this chaste kiss into the most scorching experience of your life. His nose bumps against yours and the heat of his warm breath sends tingles throughout your body, and his hands, fuck, his hands are still holding you gently but also with a firmness that feels like he doesn't want to let you go.

And then he's pulling away, and you whine at him because this may be the cruelest thing he's ever done to you ever in your entire life. "Noooooo, why'd you stop?"

"Because, as much as I'd love to continue to make out with you on your floor while an old British man narrates about life on the Serengeti—” he mercifully ignores the way you choke on your spit at the way he talks about making out with you so nonchalantly "—it's past someone's bedtime."

Your mouth drops open in offended shock. Was he actually going to put you to bed like a child? Like you both hadn't just declared your romantic love for each other? "Are you fucking serious?"

He just stands up and crosses his arms, looking down at you with a single raised eyebrow. You take the part of you that finds it annoyingly attractive and promptly smother it, crossing your own arms from your position on the floor.

"I'm not a baby," you definitely don't pout.

"Hmmm...” And then the bastard fucking pouts at you. “But you're my baby."

You blink at him.

"Welp, that was nice while it lasted,” you grunt, rolling to your feet, “but I suddenly need to relocate to Antarctica and become a penguin herder.”

He pulls you into his arms with a laugh, and you let him, burying your face in the crook of his shoulder.

“You know,” he starts after he's held you for a few moments. “This isn't how I ever imagined how us confessing to each other would go.”

You snort.

“But also,” he continues, “it feels very 'us' doesn't it?”

"Yeah,” you murmur, not bothering to lift your head from his shoulder.

“Mmm, is someone finally sleepy?” he teases, starting to waddle you both towards your bedroom. “Did all the emotions finally wear you out?”

Instead of nodding, you lightly kick him in the shin and the sappy part of your brain that is currently in charge of everything thinks that his indignant squawk is one of your most favorite sounds.

The sappy part of your brain is right, of course, and when you wake up in your bed 15 hours later and accidentally smack him in the face, the urge to run is a little bit smaller than it was before. And the way he flushes bright red after you sleepily kiss him on the cheek is an image you're going to cherish until the day you die.

[asterrrific]

lee chan x reader

Idk what to title this

Dino x reader (ft. 95z)

Warnings: none, just loads of fluff

unedited so i apologize for any grammatical errors or whatever. i made this bc a sudden idea came to me🥹

---

It was around 1am when y/n felt herself sway in her seat.

Books, answersheets, pens, sticky notes, her laptop, and a variety of snacks to keep her awake but failed were scattered at desk. It was the last week of the first semester and she's trying to rush all of her academic backlogs.

Such is the life of a senior student leader with other commitments. Always the last to catch up with academic requirements and classes because of her duties.

She shook herself awake, forcing her hand to continue writing. Her eyes were drooping, but she persevered.

"Get it together, y/n. One last chapter THEN you can go to bed." she willed herself.

But she's been staying up for weeks now. Dark circles are more than evident under her eyes. She's lost weight as well, and she's been easily stressed nowadays.

So it was hard to battle sleep.

"Bub?" came a familiar voice. Normally, she'd get excited and awake whenever she hears the endearment, but tonight, she's a dead man.

Chan cups her cheeks gently, stilling her from swaying in her seat as she battled sleep. His eyes strayed to her paper, words not evident, but random squiggles she perhaps thought were answers.

"Baby, you're not even writing answers anymore." He chuckles lightly as he takes away the pen from her hand. Y/n tries to grab it back... weakly.

"No, I can make it... I'm almost thereeee." she whines, eyes half closed, trying to reach for her pen. Chan keeps one hand on her cheek while the other puts the pen away.

"Y/N Baby, it's been three weeks. You've been busy since the start of the month. Your body is probably hating you right now. Let me take care of you please?" Chan gently prods, almost whispering.

Y/n and Chan's friends have all been concerned about her state. She's NEVER had decent sleep since the start of the month, BARELY eats her meals and snacks on time, and RARELY goes out with them.

It worried them so much that even Chan excuses himself from practices earlier than the rest now so he could monitor y/n.

"But I need all these. I wanted all these." she counters.

"I know, bub, and I appreciate that and I'm so so proud of you... but what's the whole point of achieving all these if you're gonna lose yourself in the process, hmm?"

At this, y/n's eyes flutter open, now aware of where this is going.

She knows damn well that he's right. But she just can't help but panic sometimes, knowing that the rest of her classmates have already submitted theirs and she's probably the last one left, although she's been given a grace period.

"Let's go to bed, please? It's already Sunday. We can sleep in. You can get some rest, and I'll be with you since we won't have practice. We can do anything you want except these academics. Please, baby? Have time for yourself too?" Chan barters. He tries his best at making puppy eyes at y/n, hoping his aegyo would work on her like it does with his hyungs.

Y/n sighs as she leans her forehead on Chan's. He closes his eyes and nuzzles his nose gently on to hers, then giving it a small kiss later.

"Whatchu think, bub? Like my proposal?"

"Fine, you win. But only because I'm so so drained now. How do you do it, Channie? How do you get things done and not get guilty and tired at all?" she asks, eyes closed.

"Who told you I don't get tired and guilty? I do. I just don't show it that much." He admits.

"Why though?"

"Because I don't want to worry any of you guys."

Y/N looks at Chan, his eyes on hers, his hands finding their way back to her cheek.

"I've learned to handle myself earlier on because of the nature of my career. And the hyungs helped me a lot too. If you'll allow me, I can help you work that out as well. Because I love you and I am concerned and I want to take care of you the way you derserve to." he lovingly explains.

Y/n smiles sleepily, allowing her whole body to lose its tension. She drops forward to surrender to Chan, who giggles on the floor as he catches her.

"There's my baby girl." he coos, as he sits up, caressing her hair carefully. She snuggles closer to him.

"Oh my God, I've been craving this for a whole week. I really DO deserve this." she exclaims, making Chan laugh lovingly.

He adjusts to carry her towards their shared bedroom in y/n's apartment. Gently, he lays her down before climbing in after her. Y/n immediately attaches herself to him the minute he settles in.

Chan lets y/n lay her head on his chest. He showers her head with little kisses while he rubbed random shapes on her back, lulling her to sleep.

"We'll talk more in the morning bubs. Get some rest, hmm?" Chan says, grabbing a blanket to tuck them both in.

"Mmkay..." y/n sleepily agrees.

Chan was about to close his eyes when his phone rings. A call.

"Hello-?"

"WHERE'S THE UPDATE, CHILD? IT'S BEEN TEN MINUTES. ARE YOU HOME YET?" comes Seungcheol's prodding voice. Apparently, because of his worry for Y/N, Chan forgot to update his hyungs who were still probably hanging out together after practice.

"Sorry, hyung." Chan fumbles, as he sets the call on video, showing y/n on his chest, hoping it'd serve as an explanation.

"You got us worried here you know? How can we have ber when- Oh my God, am I seeing this correctly?" asks the older male.

Chan chuckles as he brings the phone back to his face.

"Yep. She almost fell from her seat when I came in. That's why I wasn't able to call. Sorry."

"No, it's okay. What's important is she's getting rest now goddamn... she's hard to take care of sometimes. Proud of you for being patient with her, Lee Chan." Seungcheol salutes from the other side.

"Did I hear right?" Comes Jeonghan's voice as he and Joshua comes into the picture. The three eldest are like real brothers to Chan and even y/n. They worry for them like real siblings would, that's why Chan can always go home earlier than the rest, so he can care for y/n too.

And when y/n is with them, they surround her protectively, along with the other members especially when they're out, since fans can get really pushy sometimes.

"Finally, she's getting sleep. I hope tomorrow we can go out too." Joshua sighs.

"Nope. I promised her we can sleep in and we'll do whatever we want- except those freaking acads."

"Then maybe we could go there instead? We'd bring snacks for her and whatever else she needs. Tell her in the morn-"

Joshua and the other boys stop when they all saw y/n stir in her sleep. Chan immediately caressed her hair to lull her back.

"Channie?" she blinks, trying to lift herself away from him. The boys on the screen signal him to end the call and just message instead but y/n sees them.

"Oh..." she starts as her eyes adjust to the screen.

"Heyyy, y/n! We were just checking in. Go back to sleep." Seungcheol smiles.

Still really tired and sleep drunk, y/n hums. Chan smiles as he helps her lie back down.

"We'll message tomorrow Chan. Get some sleep too. It's been a long day." Seungcheol orders, his leadership shining through the older brother figure that Chan sees in him.

Chan does a salute as the call ends. He puts the phone on dnd on the bed side table and snuggles lower to cuddle with y/n, already going deeper in her sleep.

---

The next morning, Chan wakes up first. Y/N is no longer on him, but is still asleep soundly next to his chest. Her arms wrapped around his middle while her legs tangled with his. He blinks as rays of light sneaks through the blinds, and smiles as his eyes start to focus on the sleeping beauty next to him.

Gently, he carefully carressed her face, using his finger to trace out her freckles that he loved.

Y/n hums and stirs, and Chan freezes for a second. Slowly like a cat basking in daylight, she stretches, hitting Chan's chin on the process.

This was enough to wake her up.

"Oh gosh, I'm so sorry Channie." she goes, caressing the spot she just hit.

Chan laughs it off as he catches her hands, kissing them both gently.

"It's good morning first before that, my love." He says, pulling her close and settling his lips to the top of her head. With a contented sigh, he inhales her scent like his morning coffee.

"Good morning, bub." she giggles. It was music to his ears.

"Good morning, bub. How was your sleep?" He asks, brushing her hair away from her face and tucking strays behind her ear.

"It was good. Really good. I think I dreamed of the oppas..."

Chan laughs loudly at this, his laugh tickling y/n's ears. God, how she loved his laugh.

"It wasn't a dream, my love. They called last night and you saw them." he explains, pinching her cheeks softly then booping her nose.

He was overflowing with love for her so early in the morning, and he couldn't stop himself. Especially now that y/n has finally gotten some rest that she so much deserved.

"Oh they did? So they're coming over?"

"Uh huh. Later in the afternoon."

Y/n reaches over to Chan's side, where her phone was also placed. He gently holds on to her waist as she lifted herself on top of him.

"It's 9am..." she announces.

"Wanna have breakfast? Or brunch?"

"Uhm... I still kinda wanna sleep more." she admits sheepishly as she sinks back to her place besides Chan.

"Then let's sleep more."

"How about the guys?" she worries. "We might oversleep. How are we gonna prepare?"

"Well, I could tell them to come for dinner instead so we could still have more time to sleep and prepare after. What do you think, bub?" he asks, pulling her close.

Y/n takes her time to answer, and stays silent. It fooled Chan into thinking she fell back to sleep.

He was about to snuggle closer and go back to sleep when suddenly, y/n jerks up, her head hitting the same spot on Chan's chin she already hit earlier.

"Owwwww" they both say in unison.

"I'm so so so sorry bubby." She frantically says, laughing. "I was going to try to kiss you!" she worries.

"Double that then." he teases her, tending to his aching chin.

Y/n caresses the spot, then kisses it. She then locks eyes with Chan.

"You can hit my chin one million times and I'd still be head over heels for you after." he whispers.

"I'll kiss all your pain away a million times more then." she whispers back.

"Why are you whispering?"

"Because you just did. Why ARE we whispering?" she giggles. Chan sighs.

Gently, he grabs her face in his hands, and softly lands a kiss to her forehead.

He stayed there for a bit, savoring the moment. Y/n closes her eyes and runs her hands on Chan's arms, enjoying the vulnerability and sweetness of the moment.

"I love you-" they say in unison again, after Chan breaks off. They laugh again.

This time, it was y/n's turn.

As they giggled at their antics, she pulled Chan by the collar of his shirt, and gently crashed her lips on his. It took him by surprise, but he quickly adjusts, burrying his hands into her hair and softly playing with them as he returned the kiss.

"God, I love you." He speaks first as they broke it off to catch their breaths. He peppers her face with little kisses, making her smile.

"I love you..." she replies, kissing the top of his nose in return. Chan pulls her back to his chest. His heartbeat drumming loudly, lulling her back to sleep after all the fluff.

"Go back to sleep, my love. We've got a lot of time." he tells her. Y/n nods, loving every moment of her rest. Her deadlines flying out of her thoughts.

---------------------

a/n: guyyyyys it's been so long since i last wrote something here😭 uni has been so stressful lately. Maybe that's why I wrote this in this light and theme. I badly need a Dino in my life too.

Anyways, I want to write more😭 someone give me prompts or something.

And as always, if you loved this as much as I loved writing it, please leave a comment or reblog so other people would see my works too🥹👉🏻👈🏻🤍

lot's of love,

aster🫡

[zmwrites]

Tag: Questions From Sleepy

AKA, @sleepyowlwrites Wants Me To Answer These Questions to Satisfy Her Curiosity, and I Am Obliging

1. What is your ideal setting for focusing on your writing?

Hahahahahaha. There is no magic formula, unfortunately. But I tend to write best late at night when I'm too tired to critique myself, but not so exhausted that my words stop making sense. For many years that was 1am-5am, but now that I have to wake up at 7:30am every day, I do what I can on my phone between 11pm and 1am.

2. What is your favourite genre to write?

Fantasy! It is very rare I'll write something without some sort of magic, because I have been born into a world where I cannot cast fireball and I refuse to inflict the same misery on my characters. Also with fantasy, I can fudge the details on politics, geography, and... everything else related to world building. That way I can write instead of researching forever.

3. Do you prefer to write on paper or digitally?

Digitally. When I was younger I wrote on paper, and had binders and notebooks full of writing, but now I find typing is easier. I wrote most of Remnants on my iPad (which has since died, RIP), actually. I do most of my writing on my phone now that my iPad is gone. For some reason, writing on my laptop feels like too much pressure and I can't get much done.

4. It’s the middle of the night and you suddenly wake up with an idea, what do you do?

If I think it has potential, I'll either write it down in a Google Doc on my phone, or text it to my friend Nat. Usually I just roll over and go back to sleep, though. Middle of the night ideas are never as shiny as they first appear.

5. Who is your favourite person to write about?

Women who seem to be full of rage but are actually full of grief. There have been many iterations across many WIPs, I don't foresee the type disappearing from my work.

6. Do you like making your own characters or do you write about real people?

I make my own characters. I can't even write fanfic bc I can never get the characterization right, never mind trying to capture a real person.

7. Have you ever written a book or story with more than 15 chapter or 100K words?

Yes. Remnants is 153K words, and Indigo Wars Book 1 is currently sitting at 139.5K words after several rounds of editing solely focused on making it shorter. I am a chronic overwriter, so in my eyes, the people who tell an entire story in under 100K words are the real wizards.

8. How often do you get ideas?

It depends! Sometimes I won't get a new idea for months on end, and will just chip away at my existing projects, and other times I'll have four new WIP ideas in a day. Most don't go anywhere and return to the creative compost pile, but they're always fun to play with.

9. Do you ever get an idea that you really like but can’t seem to ever finish?

Most of them. But that's okay, they're still percolating. They'll get there when they're ready.

10. What is your least favourite plot?

I think almost any plot can be done well if the author loves it enough, but I'm not generally a fan of anything that ends with a woman who explicitly said she didn't want children getting a "marriage and a baby" ending. I don't think enough women are allowed to be happy without children in fiction. As someone who's always told "oh you'll change your mind" when I tell people I don't want kids, it's very annoying.

[onelastorm]

oh my god... I don't normally post about my pulls here but *grabs you all by your shoulders* It's my favorite leona card. and I was so sad and about to give up bc I thought there was no way I could manage to reach 100 pulls before the day ended. BUT BEHOLD: 30 MINS BEFORE HIS BANNER ENDS, I MADE IT. AND I ACTUALLY GOT HIM JEKAKXNKSKS

plus, it feels extra special bc today (in my timezone it's already Dec 11th) is my 1st anniversary w Leona... and I was sad because I don't have time to plan anything, but I guess HE DID HAVE TIME TO PLAN A SURPRISE FOR ME. this feels predestined... I feel so happy... it's like he saw my efforts, my love for him... and decided to grant me this wish 🥹

now I'll go to sleep bc it's 1am here + my hands fucking HURT from playing twistunes for 3 hours straight to farm gems for this mf. I love you Leona. Thank you so much for this. It may seem silly for some but it genuinely brings me the most happiness I've felt in a while.

Happy first anniversary together, Leona <3

[whispers-of-lilith]

Thank you Howl!!! Coming from you, the embodiment of perfection, I'm going to cry 🥹 [every time you post a picture I have to refrain from keyboard smashing bc you're glorious]

I tell myself almost daily that I read too much & I need sleep. Hell, I'll go lay in bed rn at 1am & somehow end up 12 fanfics deep, only to realize it's now 4am...

A celebrity too??? I think I may be going through my not so great after childhood acting phase, but I'm happy you're still supporting me [think the kid from Home Alone who's name I can't spell] & I'll rise from the ashes [probably] to be the celebrity you see me as!

Thank you for being so wonderful by just being you 🩶

What color am I to you? ❀

[purehoneybees]

ty and raven for the ship thingy <3

♡ Send me a ship and I’ll tell you

Who accidentally pushes a door instead of pulling/vice versa

that's a tyson move for sure lol

Who doodles little hearts all over the desk with their initials inside them

raven does thiss and tyson loves it too. i wouldn't be surprised if he uses one of her doodles as an album cover for a single he produces abt her

Who starts the tickle fights

raven does and it's bc tyson is super ticklish 

Who starts the pillow fights

tyson does, as retaliation against the tickle fights lol

Who falls asleep last, watching the other with a small affectionate smile

i think raven falls asleep last bc tyson will sleep thru anything

Who mistakes salt for sugar

both tbh lol but mainly tyson

Who lets the microwave play the loud beeping sound at 1am in the morning

i think i'll go w raven? but bc she knows it wouldn't wake tyson up lol

Who comes up with cheesy pick up lines

tysonn lol easily

Who rearranges the bookshelf in alphabetical order

raven! but tyson helps :)

Who licks the spoon when they’re baking brownies

raven!

Who buys candles for dinners even though there’s no special occasion

this is raven for sure lol tyson actually loves candles and will adore any scent she brings to him

Who draws little tattoos on the other with a pen

raven! and tyson probably has a couple real tattoos that she designed

Who comes home with a new souvenir magnet every time they go on vacation

tyson does this! but he won't admit that he's sentimental

Who convinces the other to fill out those couple surveys in the back of magazines

i think tyson bc he thinks she loves them lol he doesn't actually know if she does, but they've done so many now that he has committed to doing all of the ones he sees

[trashcanwithsprinkles]

ahhhhhhhh

AHHHHH

the new chapter made me want to cry....... okay, maybe it's partly because of my state of mind which is partly my fault But. that doesn't change that so

(sequence of events: stressing about today yesterday -> idiot who didn't sleep until 5am because of being an idiot [me: i'll fix my sleep habits and sleep earlier. no more 1am bedtime. also me: *finally sleeps at 5am instead* me: no that wasn't supposed to happen, why- something is clearly wrong with this picture-] -> super busy morning. slightly stressful afternoon. thankfully didn't feel tired the whole day [how] though?? small mercies, small mercies -> finally get time to relax now that it's the evening and- *sees new chapter* oh my word the Happy Time is here *immediately drops all other thoughts and actions to Read*)

that was very emotional and. and also. i am an emotional person im a very simple person i feel Feels so hard when it comes to things such as this. (10/10 in every way and thank you- that could've been any day but it was a wonderful thing to come back to after being stressed and finally getting a chance to calm down a bit) so :D

so again always thank you for the wonderful fic stuff <3 i swear i owe so much in terms of mood and productivity to your and your fics rn and i wholly appreciate it. i will be getting strength from these fics for- idk, probably years to come???? once i latch on i refuse to let go. its the least i can do

now if you'll excuse me i now have to get back to using all my braincells on trying to do art things bc it will never feel like enough unless i do as much as is physically or probably more in this case, mentally possible. im also currently playing the fun guessing game of which of these will be my last anon before i finish these things and Yell. it is impossible for me to guess but i try to guess it anyway (funny how at first i was like mayyybe i can summon the courage to send one, maybe two anons. do art stuff. gently nudge it over here when it's done- and then somehow just started coming in here regularly in the meanwhile)

here let me give you a flower to somewhat make up for the rambly rambly shenanigans of myself when it comes to writing these 🌼 may you be having a good very nice lovely day :]

i'm glad last chapter was able to bring you comfort

[sir--crow]

this!!!

I'm so happy this came on my timeline bc it's a thought I've had for a LONG time

thoughts and storytime under the cut

so I'm autistic, disabled, and have ADHD. socially I've always been the odd one out or the 'loner' back in highschool due to the fact that my social skills really sucked. but like this post said, it was about being accepted. even though some did, there was still that distance between myself and them that felt so tangible that I could never escape the insecurities of being in that friendship.

some things were SO easy for them in high school. they were able to go out after school and hangout with friends. they were able to party, to experiment, and skip classes. I couldn't. and it wasn't that I didn't want to, but that I physically couldn't do it or else I would have a meltdown. I didn't know I was autistic back then, but then and now I have my routines that I stick to. I plan my week, and hate adding things to my plans because I don't want to disrupt my routine.

my main thoughts when someone invites out were "if I go to this play, then I'll be home at 11pm. that means that I won't be able to have my downtime, I won't be able to do my homework, hobbies, or shower. I won't be able to hangout with my mom, and I won't be able to fall asleep until 1am most likely. that next morning I wake up at 6, so that means I'll get 5 hours of sleep, if that, meaning that tomorrow I won't be able to function well." so ultimately it doesn't happen.

now that I'm in college I find that it's a little easier to be social, but I still have my routine. the main thing that's changed is the acceptance part. I've accepted who I am and know that I like my life. I accept that others might not like me, or want to put up with my anxiety and structure. that's fine. but looking back I see now how much that insecurity impacted my life.

it's why I can't watch shows about high school because I can't relate to them at all. I see clips of them, like right now heartbreak high is all over my feed, and I think it looks great! I think one of the characters quinni (?) is cool and one scene I saw made my heart hurt because I did relate to them. but I don't think I can watch that show as a whole. at least not yet. it's not about the show, it's about me. I just feel a little sad seeing that social life and feeling as though I didn't experience what I should've, and I might've had the opportunity to experience it if I was different.

but I'm me, and slowly but surely I'm growing more confident in being me. maybe one day soon I'll binge these shows with my mom and have fun, but for now I'll stick to my comfort ones.

to wrap this up: this post hit me, and I just wanted to express my experience of being an undiagnosed autistic teen in highschool. I struggled. but now I'm in a way better place, and even though socially I still struggle, it's made me feel better seeing others that are like me :)

being disabled has an affect on the social life that not many people are willing to discuss . the reality is, being disabled means missing out on a lot. the queer bar you think everyone should go to isnt accessible. nobody in your towns high school was willing to talk to the only kid with down syndrome there. not all autistic people were accepted enough to be social in the first place, much less doing drugs and having sex.

there are so many experiences to miss out on

[fantasticcloudcreation]

I'm high so I'm just gonna ramble for a second

I'm back at my mom's house, it's chaotic bc the carpet is getting replaced so everything I own besides what I keep in the van with me is now in the living room; I need to get my own place. Carpet should be done by end of day tmro so I can resettle all my shit but even then I'm feeling unsettled, my mom is micromanaging everything which is valid bc it is her house and I'm technically a guest here but it's also my high school bedroom so I'm still thinking of it as "mine" even though I officially moved out like, somewhere between 2014-2018.

I want my own place but I don't want to spend money on it if I'll only be there for a couple weeks here and there throughout the year; at the same time this job is kinda exhausting and it would be nice to not have it be my only source of income, like it's fun but would be nice to have flexibility and not feel like I Have to take every gig and do a great job and rise up in the industry career etc ; I also like being able to visit my family as much as I do, even though I feel unsettled whenever I'm at one of their houses bc it's not "my house" and I really desperately want a house of my own one day, but I want to own the land and build a whole cool situation, and I feel conflicted about spending money on things that are like, adjacent to this dream but not quite reaching the mark, you know what I mean? So just kinda juggling that around. Alternatively, the idea of a camper trailer/mobile art studio... Just figuring out what I want to do/manifest this year. Really leaning towards this mobile art studio thing but again, money... Fuck money bro. Like I gotta start figuring out ways to make more money without working so hard/much. Low-key want to start playing the lottery just bc like, someone's gotta win it haha but idk how to do it.

I have 3 vapes that are all low on juice but they've been saying that for a couple days and I keep hitting them and they're still tasting fine. On the fence if I'm gonna get another one once they die or if this is it and I'm quitting. Like I love vaping but I also hate everything about it, you know? At least cigs are organic and they make you go outside for 10+ minutes to smoke them lol.

My elbow hurts and I don't know why. Sooo many bruises on my legs it's hilarious, I keep forgetting to take before + after pics of my legs on gigs bc they get so bruised. Also the sock/boot tan lines, not as bad as normal bc I wore long pants for some of the days but the rest of the time it was hot and humid, my legs needed air. My muscles are feeling really strong and firm which is nice though. Could be better, of course, but still better than it used to be. (Kinda feeling like, I want to be strong and skinny but I also don't want to look like, super buff? Like I just want a nice casual muscle tone while weighing 103lbs and still being able to lift 80lbs like it's nothing. Is that too much to ask for??) Like I feel fat rn but it's probably just water weight and I just need to eat better and hydrate this week...

It's 1am and the carpet guys are coming back at like 8am which means I can't sleep in all day like I want/need to. Feeling existentially tired and stressed about Christmas gifts and unsettled being at my mom's house, I want a cigarette and a blunt and a mug of hot tea + whiskey and I want to go sit out in the cold in the woods by a river by myself for a week at least; also noticing that in the background of this vision is the little camper trailer that I've been dreaming about, and I think that's a good sign like I always feel like I don't know what I want but then I catch myself daydreaming about something else but having certain situations and objects, you know? Like I'm thinking about how I want to go look at waterfalls and rocks covered in moss and trees with bare limbs and grey skies and dead leaves blowing in the wind and birds causing overhead, and it's just cold enough to wear a hat scarf gloves jacket but not so cold that it's uncomfortable; and meanwhile in the background of all this I have a cozy little trailer to hang out and make tea and make crafts and be cozy.

And whenever I do get to the point where I can buy my own land I can just park there until I can build all the houses and buildings?? So realistically this is not an adjacent move, this is step one towards the larger goal... Vs if I tried to find a house to rent somewhere, it's just throwing away money towards something that will never be mine... Like yeah it'll be a challenge learning how to drive a trailer and all the processes that come with it, I would probably need a different vehicle to tow it but maybe I can start with the van and see how that goes, depends on weight and everything;

Ok stop overthinking this and go to bed haha. Life is good. Things are working out. I love my job and I love my hobbies and if I sell my products I can write off all the expenses on my taxes 😎

Dm me if you read this entire post and you want to follow me on instagram haha

[slimschance]

Sunday - 26/05/24

9:00am

feeling full so i might just not eat till dinner/tomorrow 👍 my dad questioned me on why i don't want breakfast though ermm

anyway! my uncles finally replied so i might just be doing the ≈12k step walk . 1 issue, my nans off to hospital tomorrow so we're all visiting her, but the times might run over

just sat on my arse currently, watching memeulous. fun

12:14am(?)

just broke my "fast", it was only meant to be till 1am but my greedy arse broke it at 12 with 3 peanut M&M's... the fast was what, 18.5 hours? people who skip breakfast and have early dinners do that daily, thats nothing. fuck that

anyway, am watching hollyoaks, dave is in a beyond fucked situation

6:42pm

just ate chinese, i feel both full and guilty 👍 though i felt faint at one point earlier so at least im eating,, but still. the food was lush but i didn't get to enjoy it cos i was so worried about the cals since the foodsplace doesn't say em, then, the cals seemed low for takeaway so i added some oil to my tracker

anyway, no walk today as there was a storm, we'll do it tomorrow, and i visited my nan. familys so important for me so i'm glad i could make it. i watched a bit of lorax since that was on TV, apparently it's ≈11 years old now? yikes

still... no exercise is terrible ffs. glad i'll have the home to myself most daytime so i can do as much exercise as i need!

now i'm in bed chewing gum, i should exercise but my mind keeps telling me no because i just ate and the springs in my bed are both noisy and painful to my hands and back. when family's home i can only exercise on my bed. anyway, i don't think i'm gonna eat anymore today, i really shouldn't, so here's the log

although i didn't set any goals today, i did go way under my cals! (limit 650, capped at 715) i partly think it's bc i didn't have a strict number and rather just the thought to "keep it low", but skipping breakfast helped times ten for sure, i think i might do that every day this week holiday + then every other day each week - excluding exams, since i need the food then.

oh! some good news, all my so...? spray just arrived, and i just opened my sylvanian family toy from earlier in the week, so i'll show my fave perfume-body mist combo and my cute sylvanian x

look at her arms bro, shes so funny so i love her

for some reason the quality's dodge, my bad! i actually think its the shitty lighting but nevermind.

anyway

SO...? Pink Grapefruit body mist and Calvin Klein (ck) IN2U match so nicely, i found this out accidentally when using my (then) new favourite grapefruit spray with mum's perfume. i knew my juicy couture daily perfume didn't match the grapefruit spray so i'd be wasting the JC if i used it. so after a few days of stealing mum's i realised IN2U matched so nicely! i continued to use it and continued to notice it matching well, few days on i decide to search the scent profile, and it has grapefruit in it! thats why they paired well. so since, thats one of my go to combos.

also, if i ever want to smell pure edible, i use coconut body butter, vanilla oil on my blazer collar, either vanilla or coconut body mist, and a perfume with vanilla. makes me wanna bite into myself but also makes me soo sweaty legged if i apply too much butter, i need to use some sort of applicator i'm just lazy 😅 might just buy a coconut body milk instead and skip the hassle of the oily layer left with body butter

11:54pm

i've been scrolling online forums and making character diets for a few hours now. gonna sleep

[bluberimufim]

Happy Storyteller Saturday!

I’m taking this opportunity to catch up with my writeblr friends. What are you working on right now? What stage is your WIP in? How is it going? What are your plans for the future?

Basically, take this as an excuse to ramble about your writing.

Hi. This has been in the inbox for a month. Sorry.

It's still Saturday tho (she says at 1AM on a Sunday)!

I'm currently working on the WIP I did for NaNo, "Devourer of Souls". I didn't finish it then and I was left with just the very last arc unwritten. It's a 1st draft.

Recently, I had some major writer's block due to the story no longer aligning with the outline, what with Asha and Dora's existence, Seth's newfound grumpiness, and the complete overhaul of Theo's mental state. I've been having a Time (haha get it bc the main villain is the Goddess of Time ok I'll shut up now).

Anyway, I got over that writer's block yesterday (it was on Friday but the weekday doesn't change until I go to sleep, I have decided). And now it makes much more sense in-universe! And makes Theo suffer a whole lot more!!

I'm shaking with excitement at writing the final war arc but I must stop myself. I must fine-tune the outline first so I'm not flying blind. because I've done that with the Asha and Dora arc and it sucked (not the arc, just the anxiety).

Plans for the future? "Devourer of Souls" book 2. I'm gonna do them both together for maximum cohesion and work momentum. Then I'll print it out in a gigantic tome the thickness of a brick and edit! Can't wait to carry that one around in my backpack every day...

Oh, and also drawing. I'm on break so I finally have time for that.

[foggyscholar]

studied until like 21:00, took a 3h nap, it's nearly 1am and i'm abt to start studying again. 9 hours left until the exam - and then i'll go right to physio

microbio feels doable even though i'm lowkey abt to start revising the viruses now bc. bacteria took that long. literally 200 pages worth of notes that's all like - high-yield, need to know basis. sketcy micro save me, save me sketchy micro. and peach red bull.

i wonder if it's like - whether exams that you can spend 100+ hours studying for and still not feel nearly done, if that's normal outside of medschool lmao

well anyway. the sleep-deprivation is worse than ever, i have completely stopped tracking my caffeine consumption, but i Did eat an actual meal yesterday. one singular win on that front.

genuinely not sure how i'm going to manage these exams. microbio is tmrw and 8 days of intense study, i have Almost covered bacteria (i also have to know viruses, fungi and protozoa lol) - started studying at midnight today after like. a 2h nap, it's currently 8:30 and i intend to study until like. 5am. and i do genuinely think i'll manage to pass this thing, i mean. it is mostly Revision to be fair, i've done well on tests so far. but then, because of this, because i had to push my microbio date, i've had no time to study for the physiology exam, and that is also on the entire year's worth of content, that is also an entire textbook. i mean. i will study the whole day after i'm done w the microbio exam, then sleep maybe 3h, then start studying again, pull an all-nighter, and maybe, Maybe that'll be enough?? but there's entire topics that are v weak for me rn. and then i have 5 days to study for biochem which i'm the most confident in passing. it is also on the entire year's worth of information, also an entire textbook, but i've studied for that the most consistently throughout the semester, my notes are really good (unlike. well. physiology.)

if i do fail physiology then the retake is on the 26th and i am like. 95% sure i'd pass that, but i would have to cancel several commitments in late june that i really really don't want to miss out on. also every day of this lifestyle is like,, well. it's going to put me in the hospital one way or another lmao