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girldragongizzard · 4 months ago

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Chapter 6: Holes

Getting back into my apartment is actually not all that hard, since it has a big hole in it.

The silly part to me is that I have to take the stairs down to the ground floor, open the front door to the building, and then go outside just to see it. And then, in order to get the altitude to fly to it, I have to treat one of the streets as a runway and do a couple of loops when I clear the lowest buildings. I want to be able to slowly glide in to land in the hole, with as much control as possible, so I want to start higher than it.

Still easy enough, just tedious.

The traffic is light enough today that I can do this. I might have to try climbing during rush hour.

And there’s tape and a sheet of plastic across the hole, but I don’t care about that.

I do note that the businesses that are directly below my apartment are closed for the day, with that sidewalk cordoned off for safety. But my coffee shop is still open.

I do really want people to know that this is all Whitman’s fault.

But tearing through the plastic and yellow tape to enter my apartment does give me a tiny little taste of what it must have felt like for Whitman to crash through a brick fucking wall.

I want to argue with the physics of that feat, but I can breathe fire, and we’re both physically dragons. There are things at work here that were not taught about in high school or college science classes. Or any classes at all, I imagine. None that I took.

My skeletal structure alone is something that biologists will want to study intently at some point. If I let them.

My apartment is even more of a wreck than it was when I left it. The landlord and anybody else that they let in had apparently cleared a pathway to the hole by just shoving debris to the side, piling it on my belongings without any care. They didn’t touch or ransack anything else, but this obvious disregard for a bunch of things I was probably going to have to discard anyway still feels like as much of a violation of my space as the damage done by Whitman.

I hate it.

And I spend a few seconds hating it some more before I crawl to the bathroom.

I’ll spare you a description of what I have to do in the bathroom to use the toilet, though. It’s undignified and you’re probably imagining it just fine anyway.

Suffice it to say, while I can fit in there, I can never get a full view of myself in the mirror. I have to use dark shop windows on the street for that, and I’m pretty eager to get a selfie somehow, or get somebody to do a whole set of boudoir photos of me. That would be both funny and really cool to look at. Especially if my boudoir is my living room in its current state.

Anyway, despite all the damage, I’m starting to feel a lot more relaxed now that I’m in my own place. And while I’m still on the toilet, I find myself singing and practicing noises again.

I even keep it up when I go to eat the rest of what’s in my fridge.

One of the really cool things about my new anatomy is that I can breathe and make noises while my mouth and throat are full of a quarter pound of deli ham.

I’ve found I literally can’t eat as often as a human does. Because of how my hunger and digestion works, I have to gorge myself every couple of days if I’m active, it seems. But, I very clearly eat more than a typical person, and that worries me. I can’t exactly afford it.

Also, what does it mean in terms of my future development as a dragon?

If I manage to keep eating this much, is it because my body just needs this many calories to do what it does? Or am I growing?

And thinking about that then raises the question of what my expected lifespan is now, if I don’t get eaten by someone like Whitman.

I just really don’t know. There’s no precedent for any of this, and no experts. Just a bunch of myths that seem reasonably accurate so far because they describe such a broad swath of possibilities that you could make the case that a white tailed hare is a kind of dragon if you wanted to.

And on that note, once I’m done eating, I crawl over to the hole in my apartment and lie down there with my foreclaws and snout poking out into the outer world to rest and start digesting my food. And I fall quiet for a bit.

I actually kind of like this, and wonder if I could convince the landlords to let me keep it. I’m not really serious about the thought, because I still agree with Rhoda that I should move somewhere more secure and less potentially harmful to any neighbors I might have. I like living downtown, and this hole in the wall apartment would be perfect for me now. But if I’m going to be occasionally attracting challengers like yesterday, it’s just not safe or practical.

I do wonder, though, when I move how am I going to move all of my stuff?

Besides Rhoda, Chapman, and the baristas of my coffee shop, I don’t really have a group of friends who I could call on to help me move. And, on my SSI, I can’t afford a moving company.

I could try to crowdfund a few hundred dollars for a move, but then I’ve got to be careful it doesn’t go over the $2,000 limit for SSI qualification. But if I move into a care, at least I won’t need rent and utilities, and all I’ll need to worry about is food, phone, and… healthcare?

Who am I going to go to for healthcare?

A vet, probably. Shit. That’s not covered by Medicare.

This line of thought is just full of so many depressing realizations and –

Hey! There’s another dragon!

There’s another dragon flying across the bay, and it’s not Whitman!

Before I can stop myself, I’m rumbling. The rubble and dust on either side of me vibrates, and particles dance right off the edge of the hole in the wall and fall to the sidewalk below.

I lift my head to track their flight path, and feel this sneeze-like urge to squawk and rattle at them. It’s so hard to hold it back, and I might be revising some of my thoughts on instincts. But, dammit, I’m holding it in.

Since midday yesterday, my life has just been this non-stop sequence of mini-disasters, and I don’t need another one right now. Couldn’t that dragon just fuck off? I need them to go away so fast. They need to get out of my eyesight. It’s way too early in the morning for this shit.

Maybe if I go down to the coffee shop and hang out there I won’t need to see this kind of thing.

Fuck ‘em.

“rrrrrRRRRRRAWOWAAAK!!! NOKNOKNOKNOKNOK!!!!”

Shit.

And here comes another –

“GRAAAAK NOKNOKNOK!!!”

And I’m relieved just like I’d sneezed.

A cry comes back that sounds so canned, so much like a famous scream, I decide to name that dragon Wilhelm.

But they keep flying, and even seem to veer away from me. My movement focused eyesight does a great job of catching that subtly. And honestly, it’s critical when doing things like flying right into a wooded park, like I did yesterday.

I feel myself relaxing, but then I see some people on the street pointing up at me. My head twitches to put them in the center of my sight.

They wave cheerfully.

Cool.

I feel kind of proud, so I let myself puff up my chest. It’s not as impressive as it would be if I had feathers to fluff or a dewlap to inflate as well, but I don’t really care.

My emotions are just so strong today, and now that I’ve fought off two dragons, or scared them away, it’s hard not to feel possessive of my space and confident that I can keep it just fine. I’m still telling myself I eventually need to move. But I’m no longer ruminating on how or when to do it.

So I find myself sitting here for some time before I consider doing something else. I don’t really know how much time passes.

I watch some birds fly by. Some crows. A bunch of seagulls. And the seagulls look like something I might be able to catch and eat.

And then there’s a knock at my door.

At first, I’m startled and think of the police. But then I remember that I left Rhoda’s apartment without mentioning where I was going or leaving a note. Because, mostly, I didn’t have a good way of doing either without waking her up.

But after I get myself to the door to answer it, I remember that it’s locked and I look forlornly at the lock switch on the knob.

I can manage the deadbolt, but I can’t manage that little thing.

I make the classic ringtone noise loudly enough I think it can be heard through the door, then wander back to the hole. That should let her know that I’m in here, at least. And confuse anybody else that it might be. And if the door remains locked, maybe she’ll figure out how I got in.

I hear the doorknob rattle just a little, and then nothing.

I’m hopeful.

In the meantime, I don’t see any other dragons flying about, and I’m thinking I might be ready to visit the rest of my territory, such as it is.

And before too long, Rhoda walks out to the empty parking space just below my apartment and waves up at me.

I do a short chirp of the ring tone, and launch myself from the hole, gliding out to land in the parking lot across the street, landing in a row between the cars. It’s pretty easy to turn and walk toward Rhoda from there.

“Has anyone told you that you’re loud as fuck, Meg?” Rhoda asks once we’re in reasonable earshot of each other.

I lift my head and give her the smuggest cat smile.

I can’t help it, I’m feeling proud of how loud I am today. It’s saved me from another fight, the way I’m seeing it at the moment. Please don’t tell me otherwise.

“I don’t suppose you’ve read or heard the news yet,” she says.

I turn my head.

“Well, you and that other one definitely are not the only dragons that are out now,” she reports. “It’s a worldwide phenomenon, and most people are taking it in stride. The anchors I listened to were reporting it like it’s the latest step forward in civil rights or something, or a fashion trend. But, oh, there are some people who are just mad as hell about it!”

I grunt and stomp a foot.

“Let’s go get coffee and I’ll fill you in,” she suggests, so we do that.

It’s the Kims behind the counter today. Or Kim and Kimberly. And they’re delighted to see me, if a bit grumpy about the sudden construction site next door. Then, as Rhoda is placing our orders and insisting on paying for them, Kim thinks to ask if it was my apartment that exploded.

I look at Rhoda.

Rhoda explains, “We were cleaning up Meg’s apartment when –”

“Oh!” Kim exclaims, looking at me. “Your name is Meg now? Cool! I love it!”

I cat smile, full of giddy feelings at recognition, and Rhoda smiles up at me, too.

Then she continues, “We were tiding up and Meg was telling me about meeting Chapman, when another dragon attacked and broke right through that brick wall to challenge Meg. It was a whole mess.”

“People’ve been saying that,” Kimberly says.

“Yeah, but they didn’t say it was her apartment,” Kim looks back and points at me with her thumb.

Kimberly shrugs, “I just kinda figured.”

Kim turns back to Rhoda, brow furrowed, and asks, “You weren’t hurt, were you?”

“Ha!” Rhoda barks a laugh. “I’m going to need some extra heavy counseling from the police visit later that night, but no. No, I’m fine.”

“Ugh! I wish cops would just fuck off forever,” Kimberly huffs, and then takes the order slip from Kim and turns to start making drinks.

I was just going to go for a big cup of drip, but Rhoda has ordered me another mocha.

“It sucks you’re going to have to move,” Kim says to me. “Or, is the landlord going to give you a temporary lodging while they fix your place? Aren’t they legally required to?” She squints back to Kimberly.

“This is all new territory,” Rhoda says. Then she turns to me and says, “I’m sorry. I’m going to say what I think is the truth.”

I bow my head in acknowledgement. But I don’t really want to. I’m trying to think of ways I can stay in my apartment, even and including fully draconic methods for making sure it’s known I’m not leaving. But, I know I’m going to have to.

Rhoda turns to the Kims and explains, “If a dragon can break through a brick wall like that, and fights like that are at all likely, none of them can be staying in buildings with humans. It’s just not going to work out well for anyone. Even if the management agree to keep Meg in the building, she’s going to want a place that’s more secure. Like a cave. For her own sake.”

I bow my head again.

“Oh, that sucks. But I guess that makes sense,” Kim says.

“It’s hard,” Rhoda says. “The news says that statistically there could be anywhere from fifty to a hundred dragons in our own city alone. And I can’t believe there are that many suitable caves in the county. Though, I wouldn’t know.”

Eyes wide, both Kims say, “That’s a lot!”

“Jinx!” Kimberly says.

“Eh,” Kim responds. Then repeats, “That’s a lot.”

“Just zero point one percent of the human population, if that,” Rhoda says. “But, yes. A lot. Dragons take up a lot of space.” She glances at me. “Even if they can fit in a one bedroom apartment without scratching the walls too badly.”

I make a knocking sound as quietly as I can.

Eventually, Kimblerly finished our drinks and takes them both to my favorite table, which is up front near the counter. And we continue our conversation, mostly with me listening and slurping up my drink. And Rhoda fills us all in on what she’s been learning.

And I’m thinking I wish Chapman would show up, because sie is probably just swimming in all of this, and would love to hypeshare about it. Sie’d probably grill Rhoda for what she heard, too. And we’d all end up even more well informed.

But Rhoda is on it as anyone can be, and it turns out that there’s still just not that much known about what’s going on.

People are wondering, though. They may not be all that surprised by the appearance of a dragon, or the discovery that a loved one is a dragon. But everyone is wondering what’s going on. Including other dragons. There were a couple that were using AAC like me that got interviewed, and they expressed their confusion as well.

And, of course, there are some people who are up in arms about it all, too. About the same people you’d expect of any big social change, or emergence of a minority group. White supremacists, mostly, really. Terfs, Evangelicals, conservative Catholics, Militia groups, Trumpists, Fundamentalists. There’s a really strong religious contingent, and mostly Christian in nature, who are objecting to the presence of identifiable dragons in the world. And some are citing it as a sign of the end times or something. I expect there are other religions that have sects and denominations that are raising concerns or preparing to be militant about it, but being in the U.S. and English speaking, we’re not hearing much about it yet.

With the looming election, it makes my blood run colder than it already is. And I remember I’m also trans.

My life was already complicated and in danger because of my disabilities. But now I’m the new hot target for political debate, and I haven’t exactly been able to lie low locally in the past day. And my shape, size, and territorial instincts aren’t going to make it easy, either.

I have a moment wondering if, since people seem to recognize the dragons they’ve known since before the change, how this will all play with intersectional oppression. But I’m not really sure of my own ability to assess that, besides to conclude it will be complicated. I know that, in my case, I didn’t have a lot of resources before, with not much to lose, but not much to draw upon, either. And, also, I’ve traded in a couple of disabilities for a whole new one.

And thinking of that, I realize there are a few things I want to say to the Kims, so I nudge Rhoda with my nose and then point my snout at her purse.

She understands and pushes her phone across the table to me, after opening up the AAC app for me.

I hold up my claw and flex it, and then proceed to knuckle out a few simple sentences.

“My name Meghan the Dragon,” I say. “Meg OK. Cute. She and her.”

Both the Kims smile in response to that, and Kimberly says, “Well, you’re cute!”

“I see two dragons,” I continue. “I name: Whitman, Wilhelm. Whitman ass. Wilhelm smart.”

Rhoda chuckles, and says, “Oh, so that one that attacked was Whitman?”

“Yes.”

“And I haven’t seen Wilhelm yet?”

“If smart. Won’t.”

“Ah,” she says. “Is that why you were making so much noise this morning?”

“Yes.”

“Speaking of noises,” Kimberly says, “I hear you can imitate the door chime.”

I hold up a crooked claw in the best sign for one moment I can make, then knuckle out, “How fifty dragons eat?”

Everyone stares at me. I hear the rest of the cafe go silent.

“How hundred?” I ask. “What cost? What eat?”

Then I see some fortuitous movement outside the window and let my head track the flight of a seagull passing by, then look back at the Kims and tilt my head.

“Oh, shit,” Kim says.

In agreement, I make the door chime sound.

“Don’t do that during business hours, please. Or at all.”

#writeblr #dragon #original fiction #serial fiction #transformation #transgender

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sburbian-sage · 2 months ago

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You know, you get all these people who talk about the funny and silly things they do in their sessions and the weird things they find but

I feel like you dont get enough people that talk about how utterly horrifying it is to live like this

To be eternally stuck in a body thats never yours and be forced through death over and over and over

I should be turning 65 this year or at least close, copious amounts of time travel make it impossible to keep accurate track. Ive gone through dozens and dozens of sessions, learned things, forgotten most, ive loved and lived and died, and fought and fought and fought because in sburb you can never stop fighting not even for a moment

Ive turned entire sessions into fragmented code and ripped open holes into the deepest of voids and me and my coplayers jump in every time, new friends, new beings, new lives

Ive waded through the gene code slop of cancerous frogs and come out the other side more construct and grist than flesh only to wake up eternally 13

Ive killed at least a dozen coplayers, either because they were pkers or for the safety of my other coplayers

Ive been transitioning in every session for nearly 30 years only to finish the game and wake up 13 in the wrong body over and over

Sburb is hell, or as close as we can get

But its also so, so, beautiful

Watching skaia break the horizon on prospit and sink below on derse, hundreds of lands never cease to be beautiful in their own ways, fog on broken buildings and mist in endless pines, oceans of anything imaginable sloshing on candy cane beaches and sand made of broken screens

The birth of a Genesis Frog is continuously one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen, the sheer majesty of a being that contains a universe, of such internal scale that it boggles the mind

Sburb is so many many things but above all it is a game of creation and survival, its a world drunk on its own pure space, pure volume. Where the laws of physics don't exist and space is a suggestion and time less than a guidebook, its imagination in its purest most distilled form

Its my home, and the only thing ive ever known

I was originally going to be really mean and point out that "nobody talks about how badly SBURB sucks" because everyone already knows it. Every bad thing you described, 20 people are experiencing *right now*, in this very moment. It's kind of like walking into the Room Full of Spikes That Stab You In The Eyes, seeing that everyone is telling stories to take their mind off of things, and then asking why they don't acknowledge how painful the spikes are. But this kind of turned into a sappy vent post. Which I also don't like, but I'll allow it this one time.

Sorry to hear about the transitioning thing, by the way. I'm fairly certain that SBURB should be scanning your brain and generating Dream Self and God Tier bodies congruent with whatever's in there. Either this is a very bad and persistent bug you've kept running into, or you're genderquirked in a different way. Every time I've seen discussions on this topic, it's always centered binary trans people. Maybe the nonbinaries are better at dealing with it, or turned into oysters and can't type or something.

I am glad to hear about everything else though. Fight on!

#sburb #replay value au #wrong gender bug

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saint-hymn · 3 months ago

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Actually please do go on about what guns everyone would have/use 👀

ANON DONT ENABLE MY CRINGEEE NOOO

as a disclaimer i'm working off knowledge off the top of my head so they wont be like 100% accurate but then who else in the dsmp fandom is as insane as i am. also i'm only doing characters i'm a bit confident about because if the silent majority considers me mischaracterizing and genuinely cringe i will explode into shrapnel

also, this is excluding firearms that don't shoot bullets, because giving c!wil an RPG-7 is 1. too funny 2. actually accurate 3. he would have it in game given the chance but it's far less poetic

i'll probably add more as i get more confident pinning down each character's quirks, stay tuned

with that said,

c!Wilbur

as an alternative to "literally everything that launches explosives, honestly, have you seen the man?" and "he just throws a mortar round around for fun" a shotgun.

more specifically, a Winchester Model 97 -- famed for it's ability to literally "slamfire" or fire as fast as you can pump it. it's loud; every shot is a point made, 9 fuck-yous launched at 396 meters per second. it's a cloud of metal punching you in the face up close and personally. 5 rounds in the tube and 1 in the chamber, though, the proceeding violence is brief and explosive; don't throw away even a single shot

its solidly made, takes a beating, and most importantly: it's dangerous if you're not more than careful with it

c!Tommy

toms gets a DMR — a Designated Marksman Rifle, or "we just took this assault rifle (that's made for close- and medium-range combat) and put high hopes into it (be something for medium-long range combat, too short for proper sniper rifles and too long for regular assault rifles)

most of the time there aren't any big accurization modifications to it. you just slap a longer barrel and a scope on it. it's trying to fill some pretty large shoes better fit for a proper battle rifle. always needs to be something bigger than itself

specifically it's a DMR'd AR-10; reliable enough, could take a beating, well-known, well-rounded, and well-loved.

i have a headcanon that it'd have a piece of green cloth around its handguard for a better grip. its from tubbo.

c!Quackity

oh you've been waiting for this

that is a Colt Peacemaker (officially the Single Action Army) and it can be chambered in (fit) a lot of different calibers (bullet size) but i'm picking .45 ACP

it's engraved, of course it is. pearl grip. a status symbol and a symbol of power, more than anything

twice as loud and twice as shiny as god's own. every trigger pulled and crack is a sharp punctuation. precise, pinpoint bad day for whatever is on the wrong end of it. a true classic!

very much well loved honestly you ask someone to draw an old timey revolver and they'd probably draw the peacemaker's silly little hump (or a variation of Smith and Wesson's stuff, i don't judge)

Schlatt would probably have something like this. Quackity probably wrenched it off his dead body and re-engraved it to spit on the man one last time

#anonhymns #first of all i apologize for my sheer cringe i promise i just like guns and not what entails it like. the military industrial complex #if anything in this post is inaccurate feel free to reach out #honestly feel free to add to this if anyone has an idea about what kind of gun would fit who i'll expand off of it #fun fact: the germans tried to get the winchester model 97 classified as a war crime because of how crazy effective it was #dms are wide open #hymns sermons #hymnhums

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libraryofbaxobab · 4 months ago

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August 20, 2024:

This is so fucking funny.

I read this because of Dan Olson's description of it in his marvelous video "The Future Is A Dead Mall" and I was curious about how the original Metaverse was actually conceptualized.

This strikes me as a very intelligent author said "How can I write the dumbest book possible?" This should not imply that the book is bad! Just like, the Cool Guy mode was turned up to 11 and everything was so awful and gritty and dystopian that it became silly. I laughed out loud. I read introductory paragraphs to my friends. I live-reacted on Snapchat because this story is HILARIOUS and it is played one hundred percent straight. Every character takes themselves soooooo seriously riding around on their little high-tech skateboards through openly racist anarcho-capitalist neighborhoods, spouting barely-comprehensible yet extremely-plausible futuristic skater slang. Masterpiece of hilarity, no notes.

What I will offer a note on, is the weird second half gets wayyy into religious mysticism? Really took me out of it. I didn't care about whatever central mystery the characters were researching. I wanted more big dumb car chases, more "hacker" shit (in this world, "hacker" just refers to... anyone who can code), more pointless Mafia side-quests, more strikingly accurate depictions of today's technology dreamed up all the way back in 1992. In short, I wanted to see more of this world.

Weirdly enough, we didn't even spend a lot of time in The Metaverse™️ for this book being the thing that named the concept. It made it even funnier for me that this story's outside world more closely resembled our real life failed "Metaverses" in that everything was compartmentalized, financialized to the extreme, and governed only by corporations; meanwhile the Original Metaverse was a fantasy of a walkable city with public transportation and no cars. Incredibly insightful social commentary.

I had an absolute blast reading this, and even my friends howled when I read them selected passages in my best Cool Guy voice.

8.5/10 #WhatsKenyaReading

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frozenjokes · 11 months ago

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A Meeting Of Three Future Pirates (i enjoyed this little scene and wanted to draw a little thing)

in which Scar refuses to tell Mumbo his name, and Grian is determined to get an answer

Ao3 Link for the fic!

***

Luckily, the day passed without incident. That is, until Mumbo turned around and Grian was gone.

Gone and already halfway across the docks towards Pirate- for goodness sakes, what did Mumbo expect! Why had he described him so accurately? Not that it was difficult to pick Pirate out in a crowd, he stood out just as much as Mumbo did- augh! And now, here Mumbo was with an armful of cleaning supplies, bumbling while Grian was making a beeline towards a bad decision.

“Hello there, sir! Might I have a moment of your time?” Grian spoke before Mumbo could, and Pirate, quick as ever, wasted no time before turning around.

“Well hello there! What might a mysterious cloaked figure such as yourself be looking for?” The salesman lilt was in full display, Pirate facing Grian with open arms. Grian turned briefly back to Mumbo with a quick wink. Oh god. Mumbo dropped what he was carrying and hurried forward, but stopped in a strangled breath as he opened his mouth. He couldn’t call either of their names; he didn’t even know Pirate’s, but Grian’s was just as bad to yell on a crowded dock. Mumbo didn’t get to make a decision before Grian continued.

“A name, if you have one,” Grian smirked, and Mumbo couldn’t see his face, but he knew Grian was smirking, “See, I’m here on behalf of Mumbo Jumbo, we’re acquaintances-“

“His last name is Jumbo?”

“Yes, it’s very silly-”

“I don’t think so! Well, I do think so a little bit, but in a good way! It’s kind of whimsical, yeah? You guys are friends? Ah, that makes sense. He gets so worked up about the name thing it’s- oh! There he is behind you! Hello Mum-”

“Shut it!” Grian pointed hard at Pirate’s face, so aggressively, his hood nearly came off, but other than a quiet ‘oh, okay,’ Pirate didn’t look discouraged at all. Quite the contrary actually, which could only be an awful sign- “I’m here for your name, and if you don’t tell me, I’m gonna tell you what he’s called you.”

“Gri- G- Please don’t do that!” Mumbo tried, but only Pirate paid him any mind, smiling and waving in a fashion that made his heart beat a little faster.

Pirate laughed, clearly irritating Grian, though he didn’t give any indication that he noticed, only looking back at him brightly, “Funny coincidence! I was actually wondering about that! I’ve tried asking, I’ve even offered to guess, but Mumbo doesn’t have the same appreciation for games that I do. Just between you and I though, secretly, I think he likes guessing-”

Mumbo bristled, unable to help himself, “I do not like guessing!” but even Pirate ignored him this time, Grian holding all of his attention.

“I wouldn’t be so sure you want to know.”

“Oh believe me, I do! Not much phases me, I’ll tell you that much. Go ahead and hit me!” Pirate was clearly not prepared for Grian to take that literally, but Mumbo winced as he said it, knowing full well Grian could never help himself, and sure enough, his fist landed squarely in Pirate’s gut before Mumbo could even say a word of warning. Pirate gasped, folding over, but Grian jumped back like he’d been stung, eyes wide under his cloak.

“PIRATE!! PIRATE!! HELP!!”

If Grian had any talent at all, it was pointing and screaming. The dock erupted, sailors and fishermen and everyone else having returned from their trips for the evening, all spurred into action by the shrill (and if Mumbo was being honest, quite feminine sounding) scream. Mumbo, only a close distance away by now, ran forward in an attempt to help, but despite being stronger than most people tended to assume, he was no match against the beefy, adrenaline filled sailors with everything to lose.

#hermitcraft #boatemghostsau #gtws #goodtimeswithscar #he doesn’t have any scars yet :)#grian #mumbo jumbo #pirates smp #hermitcraft fic #hermitcraft au #hermitshipping #redscape #mumscar

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multific · 1 year ago

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One Week

Kai Anderson x DarkWitch!Reader

Summary: Crystal balls, a black cat and candles... this place couldn't be more stereotypical.

Kai once again found himself scrolling the web instead of sleeping.

Looking for anything interesting or something that could help his plan.

An ad did catch his eye, fortune telling.

'Fortune telling, 100% accurate or your money back.'

He scoffed at the obvious scam before continuing his search.

About five minutes later, the same ad popped up.

Now he wasn't too surprised, ads are a pain in the ass but as he tried to click to close it, he opened it instead.

And from then on, he wasn't even sure what he was doing. The next thing he knew, he had an email confirmation coming through for the appointment he booked.

Kai was honestly shocked with himself, he could be doing better things and yet, he stood in front of a black door. But then he thought, many people believed in these things. So, he could use it to his advantage to manipulate.

He knocked once before the door opened.

His eyes locked with yours.

"Hi, Andrew right?" and he then remembered he put a fake name in, he simply nodded and you guided him inside.

Crystal balls, a black cat and candles... this place couldn't be more stereotypical even if you tried.

He let out a long sigh.

"So, which one are you?"

"Sorry?" he turned to look at you sitting at the small table in the middle of the room.

"The sceptic or the hopeful?" you asked as he took a seat. "Ah, sceptic. Alright, what would you like to know?"

"The future." he simply said as he looked at your crystal ball.

"You are a smart man. Very smart indeed, I bet you came here to laugh at me and figure out my 'scam'. But your first mistake was putting in a fake name." Kai just watched you, did you break into his email? His computer?

No.

"You plan on ruling the world but your little group is not going to be enough. You will go to prison and then a girl will shoot you, dead. The great leader... gone."

"How can you know that? You are just a scammer who prays on vulnerable people."

"Oh, how ironic isn't it? You will fail. Alone, you will, but if you want, I can help."

"How?"

"I already brought the Apocalypse to the world a while ago, but Michael died and... you don't need to know that. It's enough if you know that I possess powers and I'm looking for a new partner to cause mayhem with."

"Why should I believe you? For all I know you can be a cop." he leaned forward, elbows resting on the table.

You smiled Kai felt a shiver as all candles went out in the room, it was now completely dark. Then when everything came back, you sat with a book in front of you.

"You might not be the Anti-Christ, but you will do." he was confused. "Men are easy creatures, they can be led by their cock. You are much the same, but you are also smart. I like smart because when your inevitable end comes, you will try and blame it all on me, you would stab me behind my back. I love the thrill of betrayal. I tried getting your attention but you are so blind." you looked down at the book and Kai looked around the room.

"Alright, where is the camera?"

"In the bedroom, if you want to get kinky, you could film it." you said not even looking at him.

"Very funny. So you say that no matter what, I would die."

"Yes, however, you can die a loser who never achieved his goal or you can die a leader."

"And how would you be able to help me?" you smiled as you looked at him.

"I can easily confuse and manipulate people. I can make them do things they don't want to."

"Then why won't you rule the world?"

"Alone? What's the fun in that? I will tell you how it will go. You accept my offer, but not now. No, you will go home and do your research. You will find out more about me, about the people I killed. Then you will think about it, you will think for two days and then come back here. Exactly one week from now, you will knock on that door to accept my offer to be your partner. Why? Because I want to see this world burn. You will come in here, tell me your silly conditions including a little thing where you make me promise I won't let anyone kill you. Then you will take me to the previously mentioned bed because I do need proof that I will have a great time with you."

Kai was speechless, a rather rare occasion.

You smiled at him before turning back to your book.

"Who are you?"

"My name is Y/N. Previously known as Y/N Langdon, Michael Langdon's wife, but in this timeline, I never even met him so... I'm only Y/N but I'm open on becoming Y/N Anderson."

"You are crazy."

"Indeed. Crazy, insane, manipulative, dangerous, a murderer, delusional, cunning, smart and powerful." Kai looked at you, well, what he could see above the table.

"You are perfect." he said out loud but he didn't mean to.

You only smiled.

"You are just as perfect for me, you will see. I'm loyal and I can be kind." You stood up and went towards the front door, Kai followed you, he only now noticed you truly, your beautiful curves, your scent and just how smooth your skin looked, truly divine.

You opened the front door and looked at him.

"See you after a week. Let me just say this, you will doubt me, question my intentions, but why would I try to harm you? I could have killed you in your home many times or at the gym. I am just like any other girl. I just want to have fun." you smiled as he left, and you closed the door behind him. Now, the wait begins.

---

Now you were cursing yourself, you didn't need this many crystal balls... but the site you ordered from had a sale and you couldn't say no.

They were completely useless anyway, just a nice way to decorate your home with.

It also didn't help that the house you 'bought' was not the biggest.

You wanted a big house, somewhere you can fit your stuff. Stuff you certainly didn't steal...

You took a look in your closet, trying to find something to wear, you wanted to head out and get some rich guy to buy you dinner.

Just as you put on your favourite dress, you headed for the door, taking one last glance at yourself in the mirror as you opened the door.

You almost ran into him, he was raising his hand to knock just as you opened it.

"Oh, Kai." you turned back, looking at the clock on your wall. He was right on time, you just kept yourself too busy to notice that the week was already gone.

"I came as you said I would, I made my decision... as you said I would and I have conditions, but you already knew that, so, let's get inside I'll tell you my rules and then we can fuck."

"How romantic."

"You want romance?" he was genuinely surprised.

"Flowers, chocolate and all that."

"I'm not the kind of guy."

You smirked, "You will be." you said before you let him into your house.

Exactly like how you did a week ago.

Taglist: @fleursirvart @greenarrowhead @thisismysecrethappyplace @sincerelyfan @theoneanna @aestheticsandmarvel @rororo06 @castellandiangelo @destynelseclipsa @spilledinkindumpster @capsiclesdoll @puknow @alwayshave-faith @alex12948 @lxdyred @imagines-by-a-typical-fangirl @anonymoussherlockandmarvelgeek @praline357 @trshngyn @avengers-r-us @violet-19999 @top1bbgloak @manduse @jacalineiscomingforyou @mandoloriancookie @noname2246

~Masterlist~

ˇAO3ˇ

DO NOT STEAL, REPOST OR TRANSLATE ANY OF MY WORKS

#Kai Anderson x Reader #kai anderson x you #Kai Anderson x #Kai Anderson x y/n #Kai Anderson x yn #kai anderson #american horror story #american horror story fanfic #american horror story fanfiction #american horror story imagine #american horror story imagines #american horror story cult #evan peters characters #x reader

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rosalind-hawkins · 1 month ago

Note

🐧🕊️🦤🐦 (SFW) and 🦅 for the meme?

Thank you for the asks! I pulled from a lot of different WIPs for this one! And y'all are welcome to send in more asks if you're curious!

🦅 an angsty quote (something PAINFUL!! ouch ouch ouch!)

I've teased this fic several times before, but I honestly have no idea if I'm ever actually going to finish it? But I have so much written for it that I love, and I love every part of the concept, so maybe one day I will, and y'all can just overlook the two characters that are visiting from other franchises. 👉👈

~~~~~

“Don’t think for a moment, Pegasus, that I’ve forgotten a single second that I spent on your island.” Grey eyes flashed with anger as he turned on KaibaCorp’s long-standing business partner.

“That’s all in the past now, dear boy,” Pegasus dismissed with a wave of his hand. If he was trying to calm him down, it wasn’t working.

“All in the past? You stole my soul,” Mokuba growled, an old anger rising to the surface and finding an outlet for the first time. “You stole my brother’s soul. You turned him against the only people who could have helped him.”

“That was–”

“You kept me in a dungeon.”

“I wouldn’t have had to if you had stayed in the tower.” His calm response, so utterly remorseless, sent chills down a few spines.

“You wanted to sacrifice us. And if that wasn’t bad enough, you were trying to take over everything my brother had worked to achieve.”

🐧 a funny quote (silly! laughs! jokes! puns!)

Y'all, stop asking for funnies, I'm starting to run out... (from a deleted scene)

~~~~~

“Seto, I need some advice.”

Blue eyes blinked at him from behind a pair of wireframe glasses, and Ryou was surprised. He’d never seen Seto wear glasses before.

He removed them quickly—was he embarrassed about them?—and moved his chair to the side, leaning over a little to see his friend better around the computer monitors.

“I need to finish this first. It should only be a few minutes. Can it wait?”

“Yeah, that’s fine.”

Ryou nodded and wandered over to the couch pushed up against the wall to Seto’s left. At first he perched on the edge, but after a couple of minutes he relaxed a bit and sat more comfortably.

“You wear glasses now?”

“They’re just to protect my eyes. I spend a lot of time in front of computers.”

“They look good on you.”

"You don't have to say that."

"I'm serious." Ryou smiled thinly. "They make you look less intimidating."

"Then I probably shouldn't wear them at work."

Ryou laughed.

🐦 a romantic quote (can be sweet or sad or sexy, or just your favorite interaction between them!)

Looking for a "romantic" bit made me feel dumb lol. I was like, "Damn, do I even write romance???" I just couldn't find anything! 😅

~~~~~

"You know," Duke said with a slight smile, "That sounds exactly like the kind of thing Ryou says when he's trying to explain you to me."

"He explains me to you?" Kaiba looked confused and critical, unsure of what Duke meant and unsure if he liked it.

"Maybe the more accurate description is that he explains his perception of you to me. He sees you as a very complicated person."

"That's not inaccurate."

"Don't smirk at me," Duke teased. "Being complicated isn't something to be proud of."

Instead of replying, Seto kissed him, soft and simple.

So this was the kiss that Ryou told him about. Maybe he kissed this way when he felt vulnerable. It was worth asking about later.

"Thank you for trusting me."

🕊️ a sweet quote (something sweet, fluffy! maybe it's cute or funny banter! or sappy wedding vows!)

Some Kaibro affection. Joey is a golden retriever weredog in this fic, "Puppy Love."

~~~~~

Seto rolled his eyes.

“Seriously, Seto, what harm is he going to do?” Mokuba crouched down on the floor next to his dog and put an arm around his shoulders. Joey's ears perked up. “Just look at his sweet face! How can you say no to him when he's so adorable?”

“The same way I learned to say no to you,” Seto retorted.

Mokuba hugged Joey close and teased, “Did you hear that, Joey? He just called us adorable!”

🦤 a quote you had to delete :( (but still wanna share!)

I have SO MANY OF THESE! Y'all are welcome to send in as many dodo birds as you want! (this one does not get any explanation)

~~~~~

"His existence is anger and pain, punctuated by outbursts of violence. Doesn't that sound like someone you know?"

Ryou sputtered, momentarily speechless with anger.

"How dare you compare Seto to the Spirit of the Millennium Ring?!"

“I didn’t say a word about Kaiba,” Marik snapped back. “You filled that in on your own.”

Astonished and horrified, Ryou’s jaw dropped. He slowly closed his mouth and swallowed hard, tears pricking at his eyes.

“Don’t call him Kaiba,” he finally whispered, then whirled around and reached for the door handle.

#answered ask #kira-quartz #my writing #ryou bakura #marik ishtar #seto kaiba #mokuba kaiba #maximillion pegasus #duke devlin #Mumbleshipping

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tiredtriedfailures · 2 years ago

Text

The recurring dynamic between Dong Eun and Yeo Jeong where she expects him to behave, think in a certain way, stemming from her misjudgement of his character and he clears it up in a way that surprises her and she has to take a step back to reevaluate him and every time it brings them closer. It happens in only one direction, i'm guessing because Dong Eun is a closed off person with cynical views set down for everyone and isn't able to judge him accurately as he keeps breaking her expectations and because Yeo Jeong is a very observant and socially intelligent person with dead-on analyses of people he meets, he has a look in his eyes even as she does the simplest things, he reads her well enough not to be surprised at her actions in the same way.

So first is the time when they first met and had their Go sessions, while leaving him she makes some cruel remarks about how easy his life must have been, how he could never understand her that she won't even attempt to explain herself to him, which she later finds out, happened at the most difficult and turbulent time of his life (his father's murder still very fresh) when he himself clears it up after they meet again at the train. He asserts he only seemed like an untroubled, kind, person thanks to her and their lessons together was something grounding for him in the hardest time of his life, incredibly well played as he isn't even telling her she hurt him with her words, he is thanking her for being there, making her understand herself that the way she talked to him was wrong and then thinking she should speak to him again and apologize.

Second is more lighthearted and kinda funny, while he is aware the erectile dysfunction pill is just an excuse to talk to each other a part of him insists that she wouldn't need an excuse for it, so it could be real, and he shows petty jealousy at that possibility, first telling her she deserves better, someone who doesn't need the help and that it's concerning, and then, when it looks like he's done with his little rant that's pretty polite and proper considering the topic, he slides in this comment about how wondered what other health problems this guy could have and that he wished there wasn't an inch of him that was healthy, ending with an overly sweet demeanor of someone trying to downplay their emotions and intentions. Nothing too big. Just a little surprising for Dong Eun he would so easily wish bad for someone for so little.

Third is important because after opening up to him her entire story, he tells her she will lose herself with them if she goes through with this (she doesn't know in that moment that this is the very battle he is giving himself and not just an empty cliche spat out randomly), earning a bitter laugh and Dong Eun feels compelled to drive home the point that one with such perfect life and personality, dignity, wouldn't get the lack of autonomy and dignity she feels, it isn't a choice to her anymore, she strips and whatever moving parts he had in his mind settle into place and just after being told off for being a perfect, example person, he tells her not only will he aid her in every way, he will kill anyone for her. And while she can't know just how much of it he means in that moment it's still much more than what she expected from him, cleanly separating him from Ha Do Yeong. Do Yeong, as someone who simply didn't experience anything similar, can't find it within himself to muster more than the cliches, he can only approach her situation, her life, her mind and soul baring to him as a thought experiment, a debate about human morality and the ideal way to handle a dilemma, not the gut wrenching identifying of himself in her that Yeo Jeong feels, he has inherent understanding of her.

Fourth is again, silly, she takes a jab at him saying he can't look at/like her scars but she accepted them long ago, a combination of expecting disgust and pity whenever she reveals them to anyone and expecting that reaction from him, but then he tells her, no actually, he is mad she went to see Ha Do Yeong in pretty, revealing clothes. He isn't disgusted, he is possessive and full of desire at the sight of her. Her extremely covering/ modest wardrobe has him barking at the slightest skin reveal god help him. Dong Eun was wrong again about him.

#WHY DO I WRITE LIKE THIS ITS SO ANNOYING TO READ #mypost #the glory #moon dong eun #joo yeo jung #joo yeojeong #ha do yeong #character analysis #i want to write sooo bad about them but my sentences are endless and annoying and pretentious for some reason I JUST CANT GET MEANING ACROS #ugh

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jakesuit0 · 1 year ago

Text

Still Review

“Still” is pretty overlooked, with it coming only a few episodes after the amazing feat that is “Hitman”. While “Still” isn’t nearly as funny (but still has a lot of great jokes), or even as good, it’s more committed to Ice King, Finn, and Jake interaction. Ice King freezes Finn and Jake, forcing unadulterated silly interactions between the three. Ice King wanting to be Finn and Jake’s friend is a pretty consistent goal of his from here on out, after being briefly surfaced in episodes like “What Have You Done?”.

Ice King’s been spying on Finn and Jake (as seen in “The Eyes”) enough to make some pretty accurate observations, like Finn’s favorite food being meatloaf, which is a consistent character trait. Ice King notes that Jake is afraid of real emotion, something expanded on in “Cloudy”. Finn goes into the astral plane to try to summon an astral beast. I assume this ability ties to his past life as a catalyst comet making him more in touch with spirituality, with his heightened senses from being frozen helping Finn to access it. This leaves the rest of the episode to explore Jake and Ice King’s relationship on their own. This is unique to this episode, as there’s unfortunately no episodes dedicated to just the two of them. Ice King dresses up as Finn, making for a fairly creepy outfit. He definitely dresses up as Finn sometimes when he’s alone in the Ice Kingdom. I’m sure he has fantasies of being Finn. Jake is having none of it. He’s easily irritated by Ice King, more so than Finn. In addition to just seeing him as a creepy weirdo, Jake still isn’t totally past Ice King’s murderous streak in the season one era, as he reminds him of earlier in the episode.

It’s always a treat seeing Ice King’s artistic side, and I love him going into detail of the meaning behind close up shots of penguins. The idea of Ice King as a professional photographer is just really funny. The exchange between Ice King and Jake about crushes is probably their funniest interaction in the series, with Ice King acting like a 13 year old at a sleepover. Ice King and Jake are both romantics, but both have wildly different perspectives on dating. Ice King views romance like a child, calling women “girls��, and thinking Jake’s feelings for Lady Rainicorn are a big secret. I also love Ice King acting like his “crush” on Bubblegum is a big revelation.

By the morning, Jake wants to rip Ice King’s fucking throat out. Ice King saying he’s gonna “put his foot in it” (referring to the omelet), which is a very quotable Ice King line. Jake looks so uncomfortable when Ice King tells Jake that he’ll be inside of him (need I comment more on how that sounds?). Finn wakes up, but accidentally summons butterflies, due to his past life as one. Even Jake is able to manipulate the butterflies due to his enhanced brain sense. The butterflies smack Ice King with the steel sword Finn got in “Morituri Te Salutamus”. Ice King accidentally uses the freezing potion on the three of them, ending the episode very similarly to “Hitman”, with an unresolved ending. This episode could have even picked up on the end of “Hitman”, with Finn and Jake instead being frozen in ice. Maybe BMO will save them. Speaking of BMO, where the fuck is he in this episode? Missed opportunity to have some Gunter and BMO interaction, something I’ve always wanted to see. Gunter added a lot of funny moments throughout this episode, and he finally gets to smash the unfreezing potion at the end. Ending on Gunter dancing is a pretty inspired choice.

“Still” is a pretty funny bottle episode (that also features bottles) and is funnier than anything done with the Ice King roommate arc in season 5

Grade: A-

#adventure time #finn and jake #jake the dog #finn the human #ice king #gunter #still

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reptil-enjoyer · 9 months ago

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Had this funny idea where Merasmus cursed a random Scout to become a beast and thst turns onto your dragon/scout(?? Sona. Pretty sure that's not what happened

Anyways, likeee your character fits the tf2 universe in wone way? Or it's just wacky silly fun?

Close enough with the Merasmus idea!

The general idea of it is that my guy was at first just another guy that Merasmus dragged along during Halloween, using him as just a mini boss compared agaisnt HHH, Monoculus or Merasmus himself; in a way closer to the skeleton king in terms of health and functionality (bothering you lol)

But due to not being very useful compared to the others, and the fact that the guy (Draco) was getting tired from getting killed over again and again, he was kinda 'fired'

This part mostly depends on how im feeling on what type of tf2 thing im inserting him in but, generally speaking he gets picked up for study and capture by either the red or blu team.

Not sure what happens but, something bad enough to break the chains he has during an event, on where he risks his life (due to not being on respawn like the rest) to protect scout someone on the team

He loses one horn during this, but proves his loyalty to the team enough to give him free reign around the base

Draco isnt present during combat due to the fact that it would be unfair, so he mostly keeps to the base and surroundings

Also, i do have my other guy, Jesse (kinsona) than in his tf2 accurate appearance he pretty much looks like a cursed Scout! His sillyness

#remd ask #el pendejo ese (oc tag)#self ship #friend tag #❤️🐊

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serenaberngraves · 2 years ago

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this or that? tag game

I wasn’t tagged but I’m tagging along with @rownanisntwriting who left the floor open :) You can read their answers here!

historical or futuristic

The fantasy genre has been so dominated by Tolkien that I basically default to historical settings. It requires a lot of googling since I’m not the kind of person that really cares about history, oddly enough. I try to balance being somewhat accurate and hoping the reader is more invested in the events than the setting :’)

I think another part of it is that I don’t feel very confident in my ability to design futuristic technologies; whenever I try, I end up trying to draw my own blueprints and getting lost in the sauce. I find it more comfortable to rely on stuff that has already existed so I can focus on my blorbos

the opening or closing chapter

Oh my GOD how I love beginnings! I get to seduce the reader and oh how I like to play coy.

Closing chapters are wonderful in their own right, but it’s a goodbye. I poured my heart and soul into this piece and I never want it to end. Sometimes I actually cry

light & fluffy or dark & gritty

As much as I try to surround myself with nice, pleasant things, all of my work has to include a heavy dose of grit and strife to get that sweet, sweet payoff of relief.

Yes, I’m that guy who puts their blorbos in situations just for the narrative

animal companion or found family

You really made me choose.

It’s in my DNA to create a cast of characters that complement each other. There’s something so compelling about someone feeling like a black sheep, and then meeting people that show them love in a way they’ve never felt before. And that’s probably an insight about me but we won’t talk about that

horror or romance

Well I’m currently writing a romance…

Both genres can have a similar structure of suspenseful buildup. I just prefer the release of a romance climax hehe to a horror one. I feel that I can be far more self-indulgent, too >:}

hard magic system or soft magic system

There need to be rules

I often feel like soft magic systems are a copout but don’t take personally bc I know they have their place it’s just my silly little opinion

standalone or series

Whenever I start a standalone it always turns into something more whether I like it or not. I’m either too attached to the world or the characters — or both — to let them rest. I have to keep poking around in there…

one project at a time or always juggling 2+

Bruh I have so many. But I’m only actively working on one at a time.

one award winner or one bestseller

Awards don’t mean anything to me.

I’d much rather my work reach a wide audience that enjoys my story <3 also awards can’t buy me a new couch

fantasy or sci-fi

DRAGONS AND WEREWOLVES AND VAMPIRES AND HIPPOGRIFFS AND MAGIC ALL DAY BABYYYYYY

character description or setting description

I’m trying to be better, but describing people has always been tough for me. “He’s tall with blond hair and has the correct amount of limbs. Also he’s wearing clothes.”

Whereas describing a setting I find it much easier to delve right into the mood.

Realistically the two aren’t so different — something in my mind just blanks when I’m trying to tell you what a person look like. I think part of me wants the reader’s imagination to fill in the blanks; your image of the villain based on his demeanour, dialogue, and actions is the most compelling version.

first draft or final draft

Again — I have a hard time with goodbyes!

The first draft is filled with emotion: frustration, enthusiasm, novelty, disappointment, desperation, epiphany! The roller coaster is not an easy one to ride, but dear god it makes me feel alive

love triangle in everything or no romantic arcs

…I love a love triangle, but in everything? No, there are too many ideas and concepts to explore than has nothing to do with romance.

But I mean, it would be funny to insert a love triangle in every work. It would be a running gag. It doesn’t have to be the main characters — make it some tertiary characters. If I had a following, I would go feral waiting for my readers to guess who would be in the triangle this time

constant sandstorm or rainstorm

I think a constant rainstorm would be kind of dreary in a setting but having to think about how crusty a sandstorm is would make my skin itch. I couldn’t possibly endure

We’re at the end! I also don’t have anyone in mind to tag, so if you’re up for it tag me in your responses! :)

#misc #this or that #tag game #writeblr

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izabellwit · 2 years ago

Note

🤡😈🎢✨🎶🍦💖🎯👀✅💔

im sorry im sending so many of these feel free to ignore some if you already got em <3

these answers got kinda long so dhjfgj under the readmore it goes!!

🤡What's a line, scene, or exchange you've written that made you laugh?

Hunter manages to shove all the junk into one corner and make the start of a fairly presentable bed in the other corner by the time the human re-arrives in the Boiling Isles and throws open his door hard enough to smack it against the wall.

“You took my advice!” shouts the human, at the top of her lungs.

“Hiiiiii,” says Hunter, hands over his ears. The human takes a deep breath. Hunter closes the door in her face. “Byeeee.”

(From this fic!!)

There's a lot of lines I've written over the years that make me laugh, but Hunter and Luz as a funny sibling duo…. Every time I reread this fic I giggle at this scene.

😈 Has there been a point in a story where you did something just to be playfully mean to your readers?

OH ABSOLUTELY there's a few lil ones… I think the one I do most often is namedrop other fandoms/charcters? This happens a lot in my KH fics. Like I'll have a TWEWY reference or character show up for like one second and then never again. Just for funsies and also flavor and also bc I love twewy.

Sometimes I will also set up scenes specifically to make readers think the worse happened/some guy died or whatever and then it gets revealed its something funny instead. I do that a lot too djhsfgkj

🎢Which of your fics would you call your wildest ride?

LABYRINTHS OF THE HEART. I love all I've written but nothing will ever come close to Labyrinths. It was freshmen year of college and stuff was happening irl and that fic just. Went places. I had so much fun with it.

✨Give you and your writing a compliment. Go on now. You know you deserve it. 😉

AAAA. UM. Oh god. Uhhhh I think I do pretty well with characterization / character voice? Also a lot of my fics I write for me and im always very happy with them… they are exactly what I wanted to read. Does that count??

🎶Do you listen to music while you write? What song have you been playing on loop lately?

YEAH. For certain fics I'll make a whole playlist, even! As for a song on loop.... this one! Inkpot Gods by the Amazing Devil never leaves my brain haha

🍦What's the sweetest fic you've created so far?

Ohhh gosh. Okay so its either Klee meeting the knights of Favonius or Hyakkimaru and Dororo comedy fic hjdfgkjgh

💖What made you start writing?

Oooo I gotta think about this one... hmmm, I think, I've always been a daydreamer and as a kid I used to be annoyed I couldn't "reread" my daydreams like I could my favorite books?? so I decided I just had to write them down eventually I think jhdfkgj

Of course in my mind before i could write down my ideas I had to actually get GOOD at writing (kid brain. My logic is silly, write whatever and whenever u want, u do not need "skill" to get started but ANYWAY) that's also how I started writing fic, for writing practice!! And now years later I'm still at it haha

🎯Have any of your readers accurately guessed major plot points? Care to share which?

Oooooh, a lot of readers in Labyrinths guessed the final plot point, which is that Varian will become the moondrop… most of my fics don't tend to have major twists though, I think…? There's one other fic I've written that has a HUGEE twist, but it hasn't been revealed yet and no one's guessed it yet, so ;)

👀 Tell me about an up and coming wip please!

i have a player and xehanort on the island fic in the works (exploring his possible childhood, character study and legacies kinda thing), and its still veeeeeery rough draft (like. basically still just notes) but I do have this exchange!!!

-do you think they’ll like me?

-who?

-the friends from my dreams. I’m not— do you think they’ll like me anyway?

-of course.

-but how do you know? What if they don’t? What if— what if I go out there and no one—

-he stops. He doesn’t know where he was going with that.

-silence. And then his teacher leans forward, and holds him close. I love you, they say. I love you very much.

-that isn’t what I asked.

-but it's my answer. They press a hand to his head. You’ll understand, one day.

✅ What's something that appears in your fics over and over and over again, even if you don't mean to?

The above exhange: "i love you / that isn't what I asked / but it is my answer" has actually shown up in a few fics! It's a common theme I guess u could say... its a conversation that means something to me and I think it is changed slightly by the context of every story, so I keep bringing it in jhdfgkj

Other things that crop up a lot....Found family for sure! Uhhh the phrase "rolling the thought like candy on [their] tongue" shows up a lot without my meaning it too djhfgjkh

Oh!!! Honey!! Honey shows up a lot. I think honey is fantastic. Did u know it lasts forever? Also it has great medical properties--Anyway I think you get the idea haha

💔 Is there a fic of yours that broke your heart?

https://archiveofourown.org/works/27801085/chapters/68061658 hehe

Anyway. The woods whispering fic may be completed but I think about the fucked up found family relationships in that fic 24/7. The moment i posted the last chapter i had to stare at a wall for a bit haha

#ask game #THIS WAS SOOOO FUN THANK YOUUUUU #oh i havent done these in forever this was so fun dsfgh

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tranquilspot · 1 year ago

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John: Read Colonel Sassacre's text.

Long post ahead! TW/CW: unabashed sexism, misogyny, racism, call to murder as a 'joke', aged like milk content

Block of text n°2. Get ready to get the old timey dictionary, cause I sure will do a loooot of research.

Before reading the text itself, let's analyze the picture. There's Mark Twain (Colonel Sassacre in this universe) in the middle with a silly magician hat on top and an engraved sun. On his left and right, surprisingly two versions of The Fool arcana.

The Fool represents new beginnings, freedom, innocence, a free spirit. Pretty accurate for John. There's also several clowns: entertainment, playfulness, tricks, but also mockery, illusion, humiliation. I'm saying this because it's relevant. We'll see it much later, during different points in the story. On the bottom, two masks, both smiling. One a demon, perhaps the Devil itself. Which is also a major arcana: obsession, dependency, powerlessness, limitations when it's upright. In reversed it's independence, revelation, reclaiming power, reclaiming control. Very interesting. Let's keep it in mind for later. I have no idea for the other mask, it would be easier if I knew the origin of the 'borrowed' pictures that constitutes this montage. At last, two writing tools that could represent freedom of speech, creation and imagination. The word colonel was added on one of them.

Welp, that's enough dilly dallying on the image, let's dig right into the text now. *grumble mumble I have to manually write it grumble mumble*

Hell's bells, we are having a mighty sporting time of it!

"Hell's bells" is to express anger, surprise or irritation. I'll bet it's surprise here. let's see the rest of the sentence. I haven't find a direct explanation for 'sporting time' but I suppose it means 'dynamic good moment'?

Hold fast, my intrepid fellow pranksmiths! We've merely nicked the mahogany of our japing chests.

Pranksmiths is such a cool term :D So if I understood correctly, this means: "Hold on my fellow pranksters! We've barely scratch the surface."

If I may direct the incisive ogle of your beagle puss to the wriggling regency of rubber bugs […]

Wait wait wait so many new words here!

A sharp eye, okay, of our joke glasses (the one with the funny nose and mustache), and hey! First time seeing 'wriggling', that's mostly used in troll culture. Sassacre was married to the baroness, not sure how much he knew about trolls but I don't think the use of 'wriggling' is a coincidence here. Betty Crocker was already mentioned too. There's miiight be a small chance that this peculiar plot element existed early in the story. 'Regency' is to govern, hmm 'wriggling regency of rubber bugs'. See it's not trivial! Bugs, insects that govern. Sneaky early foreshadowing~

[…] plastic parasite, squirming serpents, pliable pests […]

:0 I know it's common repulsive animals, but look closely. We have bugs, immediately followed by parasite (opinion on his wife perhaps?), followed by a snake (Lord English), and 'pests' are aften rodents. Not sure where does the last one fall in the metaphor. Reading too much into it? Maybe, maybe not.

[…] and every such order and phyla of creepy crawlies!

I'm curious to see what 'order' means in this context. Perhaps 'and such things'? Also phyla! Hello brand new word. Oooh I see, like two branches of the same group of things. Junction! And creepy crawlies! I literally on the picture but i forgor. It's self explanatory, crawling little bugs. This confirm, or at least solidify, my theory on Colonel Sassacre's book to be a parody, autobiographic, but now hinting at what we are to expect from this comic, in terms of plot points and characters (trolls, a tyran parasitic sovereign, snake species..)

Land sakes alive, we are cooking with petrol now!

'Goddamn, now we're talking!' We're half-way through the introduction, of the book I mean! Can't wait to reach the end of Act 1, which is only a part of the 'tutorial'.

In further exhibits we shall dwell on artifice useful to your exploits.

Alright, not very complicated to understand.

Is your pappy's rod and reel handy?

What? *long search* Oooohhh like a fishing rod and thread. I thought that was an innuendo *sweat* I mean it isn't above Hussie to not do it. 'Handy' here means in your hand, or near it.

What about a bit of iron cord; it shouldn't prove elusive.

Are we talking about cord made of iron, or the cord of a iron, the appliance? If it isn't rare to find it I'd say the latter.

Bring those writhing rascals to life, […]

Uuuuuuuhhhhh..

and set the nerves of some old maid to the wreck of Hesperus!

Okay what the fuck old man!! Not only it is misogynist but you take delight in scaring to death a poor woman that didn't ask for it? Bring them to life.. what the heck does that entails? Wait it's rubber bugs and such, so you're not electro-stimuling them, how does cord + rubber work? Whatever, what's more interesting is the mention of another entity, Hesperus. One we never hear about either in the story nor the community itself. It's a titan, embodying the evening. Right between Hemera, the day, and Nyx, the night.

However here it is not about the god itself, but rather a poem, the Wreck of Hesperus. It's the short story of a skipper who board a ship with his daughter and didn't listen the warning about a hurricane. Long story short, the ship crashes and sink, dude dies and the corpse of the girl is found still mangled to the remains of the ship. That's horrifying. What the fuck, it went from 'let's have a jolly time with plastic toys' to 'what if we made scream a maid like a terrified girl on a sinking ship, sounds like fun!'. He really wants to scares a woman to death.

Do you have a bothersome aunt who never seems troubled to find ways with your sunny afternoons? A broad, splintery fence— a bucket of white wash, perhaps?

Sir this is a crime, he's calling for violence and murder. That's a feminicide happening soon! What the fuck, how in HELL is this book not censured, or BANNED?! This is 2009, doesn't someone check books before publishing them?

By gum you'll fix her wagon!

I'll fix your face, time shenanigans be damned! What is it with dudes fixating on other people's ass?!

Also, whitewash is a mixture, and "covering up a scandal" too. Smells like subconscious slip of his wrongdoings~

God this is tedious and awful to read. Almost there!

And what of that tawny gent who puts his lackadaisical lean near the sarsaparilla font?

It feels like a lot of made up words. I mean yeah words don't come from trees or the 'Great Book of All Words and Those Yet to Come', but I can't imagine people using them on a daily basis.

Ok, 'lackadaisical' is showing little effort or enthusiasm, 'sarsaparilla' is either a climbing plant (east asia) or a drink based of said plant. Between the sarsaparilla and the mahogany, him knowing such foreign flora gives me rich traveling dude and colonialism vibes.

You'll have that listless octoroon find the spring in his step just yet!

That's a lot of stuff that I don't understand, but I do know that an octoroon is mixed (ethnicities). "The word octoroon signifies a person of one-eighth African ancestry." according to Wikipedia. Gonna add racism to the old man bingo. Listless means lethargic. As in 'lazy african pests'. Yep it's racist alright. When does it takes place anyway? 1910/20-ish?

Alright lemme think and recontextualize all of it, I suck remembering events and dates so I need time. My grand-grandmother was born in 1912, year and day of the Titanic sinking I think.

The expression "sakes alive" was popular in 1930~1950, and its earliest use was 1860. So I kinda narrow it down.

After a good while I found this screenshot I took in 2019, couldn't find user pepple :/and princeofhope haven't posted anything since 2014. I couldn't even find the original post. But yeah, by relying on this graph it does make sense. [I wish I could properly credit pepple, if they're still there] —>

#homestuck #act 1 #homestuck reread #reread blog #colonel sassacre's book #the fool #old timey vernacular #racism #sexism #misogyny #bigoted old man #call to murder #problematic book #re-contextualizing

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rottenbrainstuff · 2 years ago

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I am half way through Jojo part five! The main bad guy has FINALLY showed up! Lmao.

I bought the blu rays so I’m watching it on those now, rather than the fansub I grabbed earlier. I really am not a huge fan of the newest viz releases. I don’t like their “new and improved” subtitles. Translations of things are going to be on a sliding scale ranging from a completely accurate translation, to something that is more accessible to the target audience, and I know that where you think a translation should fall on that scale is going to be a matter of personal preference. Me, I very much prefer more accurate translations, and especially now that I can understand a little Japanese, I get really annoyed when I know that what I’m hearing doesn’t match what the words are saying. I feel like the dub is the place for creative interpretation. If I’m watching it with the Japanese audio it means I want to know what the Japanese version is like, and I want accurate subtitles.

Similarly, I get really really irritated with all the name localizations and I don’t really understand why. I mean. It really doesn’t make any difference to the story if the thing is being called Moody Blues or if it’s being called Moody Jazz. Right?

I guess it’s just… first of all like I said, you can HEAR with your DAMNED EARS what they’re actually saying, and it’s silly to have that disconnect with the subtitles and be taken out of your suspension of disbelief for a second and you’re reminded oh right, because of whatever stupid copyright negotiation or lack thereof, they’re not allowed to translate the name that I can HEAR THEM SAYING ANYWAYS. Like, for the dub do whatever you want. Localize the names however you need to. (I really dislike the part five dub btw, more than I dislike the dubs for previous parts. The part four dub was actually pretty good) Change it how you need to. For the close captioning of the dub, caption what they’re saying. Sure.

But I don’t want to read subtitles that are supposed to be a translation of the audio and be reminded constantly that it’s not an accurate translation. It’s fucking irritating.

Second, I feel like it removes one of the interesting little quirks of the show. The manga artist puts so much of his weird little interests into everything, he is a huge music fan so he names characters after famous bands and songs. It has nothing to do with the plot, it has nothing to do with anything, but it’s part of the charm of the thing. So it’s irritating having it taken out. And in such a stupid, clumsy way. L’il Bomber? L’il Bomber???!!???

For the actual part five itself though… it’s not my favourite, but I think I’m learning to like it in its own way, more than I thought it would. The plot makes the least amount of sense of all the other parts, and that’s saying a lot for a show that’s about punching bad guys with ghosts in increasingly complicated ways… Abbacchio is still my favourite even though he’s not in it much. Doppio should be showing up soon here so I’m looking forward to that.

One thing I really like: it looks like every once in a while, they got a bigger budget for certain eps, and suddenly there will be a scene with some really nicely drawn keys (key frames). It’s quite nice! I wish the other parts were given the same treatment occasionally.

Nice! I love it. Anything that gets away from the very homogenous look that it otherwise has. For some reason it reminds me of Kouta Hirano’s Hellsing faces.

Everyone talks about King Crimson being confusing but like man I’m confused enough just by Gold Experience, none of these stands make any sense to me anymore, I miss the days when it was just really buff ghosts punching each other to death. I don’t really care that I don’t get it. Mista gets shot an awful lot for a dude who has bullets for a stand. (It’d be like Ghiacchio getting frostbite… it’s funny) The bad guys continue to be gross and nothing in this show makes sense and that’s how I like it.

#jojo's bizarre adventure #golden wind #anime #nerdery

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