#not the worst essay I've ever written somehow

[sophiethewitch1]

hey sophie! ive been listening to the www playlist a lot lately and was wondering if you could bust out ur playlist thesis? however much ur cool with sharing!! would love to hear your thoughts hehe. also, are there any bonus tracks we can listen to from the big og playlist?

i want you to know that for this entire post I was doing this

absolutely constantly. raving maniac mode. under the cut so i don't make everyone hate me for all the bullshit im about to spout and like some cough cough future hints. No actual spoilers but like... vibes and things that are obvious. Me telling you there will be yandere things in the yandere story, shock horror. These songs are the trailers/animatics in my head so uh. It's kind of hard to explain them without that (which is why I literally CAN NOT) for a couple of them lol. Oh!!!! And I've also got some other songs that really should've made the playlist but I just didn't add for some reason. Laziness or whatever. One's literally called birthday party. I uh. Don't think I need to explain that one.

But also I just like, whatever who cares if some of the songs on there aren't ones I 100% associate w what we want so here's the full playlist live your dreams. Most of them I associate at least a moderate bit. BUt under here is the fucking essay I've somehow written lmao I lost my mind somewhere along the way.

WHAT YOU GONNA DO??? By Bastille and Graham Coxon is first on the playlist for a reason. It's sort of like, similar to the rocking feeling of what being cramped on the subway was like to me? And it's a song that's pretty obvious with the lyric comparisons. The 'you' in the title IS you! What are you gonna do? You have us (Gotham, the world, the batfam) listening, so what are you gonna do with it? And it matches readers future response quite well I think. And it feels like something that a superhero would have in the background, which certainly helps.

Keep You Mine by NOTD and Shy Martin was actually just one of those songs you were listening to on loop at the time you were doing a thing, and then became intrinsically linked to that thing, but it still represent WWW quite well! It matches more so the later acts of the story, where you and the boys will have some issues staying together with eachother. But it's still poppy and romantic in tone!! Because you guys and your relationship, despite everything that'll happen, you want to keep each other y'know? And reader's like possessive and jealous in a cutesy way to offset how absolutely psycho bonkers the guys will end up being... But I also feel this too matches the superhero vibes? Somehow? The fight on of it... You must keep fighting, for each other!

Tinfoil Hat by Dolo Tonight is like,,, about the frustration of being a Gotham resident I suppose (or anyone living in late stage capitalism with a mental illness) but especially you! Since you totally fucking got ripped from one universe to another and um, i don't know if you've noticed this yet but... there seems to be some issues with readers idols??? Seeing as you love the waynes but hate the bats. Please duck under the comically large chekov's gun and come this way. Also because reader for a little bit does geniunely think she's crazy and need to go to the psychiatrist but obviously thinks that is the worst idea ever because the gotham mental health system is really just prison. and it's a prison with her nemesis. not the place to be.

Live, Learn, Die by Lavin is pretty obvious too, but in a much sadder tone. Reader as a character has at this point come to a conclusion that I'm sure many of us do in their lifetime (I know I have at least) which is that... things suck, and then you die. She doesn't want to die, but she doesn't really particularly actually want to live, she's just so damn focused on survival she's never actually even had the time to realise that. This other version of her who didn't have 24/7 adrenaline running in her body was obviously significantly worse off and seemed... off. If everyone you love is dead, is surviving for them even worth it anymore? She's still learning, so maybe she'll learn something different this time...?

Next song is a spoiler so skipping it <3! Lmfao interpret this however you'd like

Thelma + Louise By Bastille is a song about a scene that I am so damn eager to get to which unfortunately is in act fucking 3 which is my favourite but like. Suffering I am suffering :) Anyways I can't tell you too much about it because of but I will say that it's a road trip between you, Dick and Jason! It's very fun and absolutely no complex feelings are involved whatsoever. You meet Lucy the giant elephant (actual roadside attraction in new jersey lmfao). This song is Dick Grayson coded in like... mostly sunny vibes. Like the warmth the song gives, that's how you make him feel.

Temper Temper by LimeCordiale is a song that is about... you and Jason... and his poor poor habit of enabling you. 'Me and my girlfriend that I let do whatever she wants to me because shes hot' core. Bruce sees the two of you in the landing and gets immediate d10 psychic damage it's impressive. Anyways if anyone ever angers you (which I'm sure they never ever ever will :)) he's probably going to be there to back you up, because 'you know that that's what I like'. That video of you punching George is private time material frankly.

Next song is ALSO a spoiler which um. cough. 😳 let's not look too deep at this one actually folks

Werewolf By Quinn XCII. Ah yes, the yan in the yandere story. This one is ALSO about Jason but this is the most Jason coded song. I will say that this also features in the story at some point (you, Molly, Dick, Jason and some very poor suffering grunts). It's the lyrics. I've always said Jason is a loyal dog and I stand by it till the day I die. He also feels like a feral animal that constantly kind of wants to swallow you whole which is romantic I think <3 <4 But geniunely put that thing on a leash for the betterment of mankind. I mean you make them all feel like starving monsters Jason's the only one who has any self awareness unfortunately, which is why this is HIS song. Also because he'd be a werewolf, case close your honour. Dick'd be a vampire it's LITERALLY canon. WHat was I talking about

Ghosts by The 1975 got on here because I heard the first line and went 'hA!' because it really do just be 'You... You always seem to get what you want.' and also the "You seem to get better" is fuckin. IT'S SO GOOD MAN! That's EXACTLY what the guys are thinking when the next few chapters start coming around which. Really were supposed to be out by now whoopsie but yknow like. Anyways you ARE gonna start working on things!!! You're gonna talk to Molly!! You're gonna get more flowers!!!!! God damn it, you're gonna get what you want!!!!!!!!!!!!! (at least this first bit oop)

Next two are spoilers again, but this time you absolutely won't be able to guess because they're both animatic inside my own brain so take that! And I mean you REALLY won't be able to guess they're great scenes can't wait for you to see em. I can't wait either tbh why am I writing these stupid filler scenes lmao. why can't i skip to the end of my 200k enemies to lovers slowburn just to write the final chapter (did this to herself)

Together We're Screwed By Robotaki and Nevve is a song I've loved for ageeessssss bro because there is (to me at least) nothing more romantic than being a terrible horrible unredeemable person with the one you love. Hand in unlovable hand baby! That's like... the fic I guess, together the five of you are screwed. And it just matches that same earlier mentioned vibe of like... poppy kinda techno-y kinda superhero-y kinda loser-y. Listen to me, listen to me... This fic is about many things and I'll say it again and again and everytime it's true in a different way and this time it's true in this way. This fic is about being about being a loser and bad at everything and still managing to get what you want. Actually that might be what this fic is actually actually centrally about. 'We're both a mess, we just can't get it right. Together we're screwed. I'm looking at you, I'm looking at you~' like, be a mess!

And now we're at the exciting new

Birthday Party by AJR is like the equivalent of what would be a canon event for this au. Your birthday HAS to happen and it HAS to suck ass and all your family HAS to die on this day for some reason or another.. Some people told me when they had their birthday they thought of my fic and I was like damn bro who hurt you? /jk but really reader's birthday is kind of a reflection of... you know, everyone has at least one of those sucky as birthdays. And you've gotta paste on a brave face and pretend you don't want to cry and that it's all not too much and that for some reason you're disappointed and that the trudging march of time scares the shit out of you and that you haven't achieved anything this year and- You know? 'And that's just how it is.'

Okay I've run out of videos I can add but there are only two songs left so!! Ima finish this anyways.

Inertia by AJR is a song where again the lyrics speak for itself. Before you woke up in a slightly different world where everything was just slightly different, your life was stagnant. You were stuck, absolutely. Despite trying to break out of poverty, out of your circumstances, fortune simply wouldn't smile on you. And again, that other you seemed to reflect that stagnancy. She wasn't going anywhere either. In my head I see the two of you dancing like marionettes alone on your stages alone, unable to fight against the strings pulling at you. It's only till you start dancing with eachother, till the strings start tangling that you start getting any freedom. That you're able to start getting anywhere. Maybe being set off course was the best thing that could happen to both of you?

Something Just Like This by The Chainsmokers and Coldplay is a song that both me and my mum love, and also one very fitting to the superhero theme! And it's how ALL the guys feel about you!! You're really just a civilian, you're not that important in the grand scheme of things... But why do you like them? It's for such stupid reasons. It's because of the way Damian reads romance novels and Jason never properly tapes his nuckles and Dick has a stupid bleeding heart so he keeps taking too many hours at the Bludhaven pet rescue and Tim always fucking sends you the new york wordle, connections, crossword and spelling bee first thing in the morning and then asks if you want any help when he knows you want to do it on your own and- Every single moment of you is done with such love and sincerity and heart and they can't help but fall in love again and again and again. 'I want something just like this' is a phrase they'll say to you and you'll say to them too.

[thlayli-ra]

Which 5 fics you've written are your favorites or most proud of?

Ooh! Thank you Anon for slipping into my askbox with a lovely little question. Must admit, this was hard! I'm proud of most of my fics so whittling it down to just five was tricky but here goes;

1. Flint and Steel - I feel like this is the best writing I've ever done. I wrote it back when I had bags of time to edit and re-read what I'd written previously so it's a better coherent story. I love the world-building, the imagery, the harsh but beautiful love story. This is probably still my best work to date and I really hope to finish the series one day and do it justice!

2. Would You Offer Your Throat To The Wolf - This one just feels... special to me. It's the most brutal, graphic and depressing fic that I've written and my first foray into pure horror but was very liberating to write. It also felt like something of an event at the time - I'd been building up towards it here on Tumblr so when I finally posted it, it kinda had its own little following. It's also a fic that has prompted so many incredible comments and feedback from readers, many of which said it inspired their own writing and that is just so cool to me!

3. When We're Alone - Of all my fics, this is probably my own little personal favourite (and one of my least popular 😂). It's a silly, little Underpunk fluff piece set in the Valetverse AU. I just loved writing a hopelessly un-domesticated Punk trying (and failing miserably) to nurse Taker back to health while he was injured. I usually write Punk as very intense and moody so having him in more of a comedy role was a lot of fun (although he's still very moody!)

4. The Moon Rises Red Tonight - My other unloved little baby! It's a close second for my personal favourite fic. It's utter self-indulgence - I wanted all four of my faves to fuck! That's it! That's the premise! But, because it's me, and I'm god-awful at writing smut, it somehow turned into a porn with plot fic, focusing in on politics, corruption, and trauma, whilst also being rather light-hearted and wholesome. And filthy too! It's a weird bag! I adore the au, I adore all the flawed characters and their self-discovery throughout and I want to draw and write more for it in the future.

5. The Chain - Sometimes, a moment sticks in your head and magic happens. That Smackdown where Drew carried a bloody Punk to the ramp and dumped his carcass for all of his hometown to see was....... [local dogs start barking]. I had to write something for it! Originally it was going to be another headcanon essay talking about a motif I'd used in several fics of Punk and AJ being connected by a chain with hooks embedded in their chests when it dawned on my to actually write a fic about it, resulting in this twisted soulmate au. To me, it's a perfect little fic, a beautiful gemstone in my collection and I'm very proud of it.

[Honourary Mention - Yes, I'm cheating here but I couldn't not mention my most popular fic The Valets of WWE. Despite it easily being my worst in terms of writing prowess, it's a huge personal achievement for me. It had a massive cast and was heavily influenced by reader requests and input so I had to think on my feet for every chapter and change things up on the fly sometimes. I also had to write for characters I didn't know very well during an era that I admittedly didn't really watch (no, I'd never seen any Legacy or Social Outcasts footage until writing this fic!!!) so that was a bit nerve-wracking. But despite the challenges, I managed to create this huge, intricate soap opera, that had so many interlinking storylines and plot threads, that had characters bouncing off each other constantly and even if it reads more like a script than narrative, I'm still very proud of it and I always look forward to returning to the valetverse for more!]

[sadia342]

Being extremely honest ... we automatically create disconnection.But ... maybe it's better ...  by romanian author Adrian Dumitru

Truth be told ... i was never so honest with the people from my life.

And ... it's not that i am a liar.

No ...

I have moments when i am liar too ... but not all the time.

I .... actually ... can't be honest enough cause ... i am too diplomatic.

I don't want to ... hurt them.

So ... i shut up.

Or ... simply say ... beautiful lies.

Ignoring the obviously truth.

I do that by such a long time ... that i believe .... that nothing will ever change.

I'll just continue ... to lie.

I could be honest ... and tell what i think ... but most probably ... i don't do it cause i know that means .... i'll come into a point when i'll just disconnect from those persons.

So ... i just endure all related to the relationship ... believing is the best.

Yes ... i avoid the truth.

I avoid saying what i really feel and think ... cause I'll automatically induce ... the end.

And .... I don't want it.

If i'll start practicing honesty ... i'll just cut all my connections ... with most of the people from my life.

So ....am i a liar?!

Why i run away of honesty?!

Why ... i am so afraid to reveal my real thoughts ... feelings or emotions?!

Just to not lose these people?!

But what is actually the price of remaining connected to them?!

And ... stay in lie.

Well ...

Somehow ... i am losing myself.

... doing this by such a long, long time ... being too afraid of remaining alone on the stage of life.

Fortunately .... more i am meditating ... i feel much and much stronger ... that i am actually afraid of losing all those connections ... cause i'll remain alone with myself.

And ... it will be hard.

Much too difficult.

Maybe ... worst will be ... that continuing to be honest ... forgetting about all the lies i've used till now ... i'll clearly see the emptiness from my soul.

That ... will hurt me a lot.

And ... i balance between continuing pretending i don't see the truth ... using all the time lots of funny lies ... just to not disconnect from all those souls which are around me.

Cause ... being alone ... me with myself ... will be too difficult.

Much ... too difficult.

Download the book ”DISCONNECTING

... seen as un amazing trick for a beautiful life

philosophical & spiritual essays” written by the romanian writer Adrian Gabriel Dumitru for FREE.

Amazon - https://www.amazon.com/DISCONNECTING-seen-amazing-trick-beautiful-ebook/dp/B0DFQJXZ3D/ref=sr_1_56?crid=O5DE3OIIBU3Y&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.emLw8DTnC4rP5P-HI0y4LYxDBZTAtRsy5p1BMmAZifKJ-4TJ2A5fZ7CbowvnJwqRYlVeuSUF9tsFCifBvmpz0-KOGcBVn1hgrguACzoGiSHyGVvnLMyVYAjWaHmlIYYpd3lW6US2QlkDpue65kwNUGNTwtYkqi8My2T-Nplkx-s.fYKCaEcFDuj-92N0YhwQl9P4uqtdAPvszxEC-U81lOc&dib_tag=se&keywords=adrian+gabriel+dumitru&qid=1726480317&s=books&sprefix=adrian+gabriel+dumitru%2Cstripbooks-intl-ship%2C195&sr=1-56

Google Books - https://play.google.com/store/books/details/Adrian_Gabriel_Dumitru_DISCONNECTING_seen_as_un_am?id=RaQbEQAAQBAJ&hl=en

Apple Books - https://books.apple.com/ro/book/disconnecting/id6657977255

or www.adriangabrieldumitru.com

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/adriangabriel.dumitru?utm_source=ig_web_button_share_sheet&igsh=ZDNlZDc0MzIxNw==

Facebook -

Linkedin -https://www.linkedin.com/in/adrian-gabriel-dumitru-7b456a281?utm_source=share&utm_campaign=share_via&utm_content=profile&utm_medium=ios_app

[grandhotelabyss]

Thoughts on Anaïs Nin?

I've only read Delta of Venus and therefore have nothing to add to the capsule review I posted last year, which I will reproduce here:

In an essay on John Updike’s Rabbit Redux, I surmised as follows: “as [William] Deresiewicz writes, ‘Updike stood between the old and new Victorianisms’—between, that is, the hegemony of Christian sexual morality and the hegemony of progressive sexual morality, when sex was briefly available for amoral examination.” In these crisply and beautifully narrated stories, written as pornography-for-hire by a literary collector, Nin writes in the same moment and gives voice, moreover, to female desire, whereas John Updike, as befits his somehow tumescent name, gave voice to male (though both authors write from male and female perspectives). But she fulfills this supposedly progressive mandate before progressive hegemony, even as she writes after Christian hegemony. This means that we find in these stories wholly unembarrassed portraits, in Nin’s precise and evocative prose, not only of female sexual satisfaction and homosexuality male and female and even intersex erotica, but also of pedophilia, bestiality, racial fetishism, and rape fantasies, reminding us that desire, like literature, makes no moral or political guarantees.

I love the lyrical clarity of those tales. I tried The House of Incest and found it unreadable. The two worst 20th-century styles are the strenuously "masculine" minimalism (Hemingway at his worst and all his worst imitators) and the strenuously "feminine" lyricism (Woolf at her worst and all her worst imitators), and that novella struck me as very much the latter, whereas the prose in Delta of Venus perfectly balances these impulses. I'm admittedly not a fan of Sade or Bataille, but it might be the best literary pornography qua literature I've ever read.

[jemandtherobots]

books read in 2023, part 1 of 2

thought i might as well do a post like this for the first half of the year bcos a) i've read a lot so this post will be long and b) i already have to go back like "i have no memory of this place book" with half of these.

Andy Weir - The Martian

No memory of why I wanted to start the year with this but I guess it falls in the category of "cosy read" for me so.

Jean Kearns Miller (ed.) - Women From Another Planet? (finnish translation)

Found my way to the mental health shelf of the local library and picked up some autism books instead of whatever it was I was actually looking for; this was an interesting read of essays and conversations between autistic women.

Puhu hereille (finnish)

This is an anthology of poems and short prose written by people on the autism spectrum and I 100% recommend it, I'm a little sorry it's hidden away in non-fiction and not shelved as poetry or whatever, but I'm very happy I found it.

Henry Fry - First Time for Everything

On one hand it's giving girlboss but make it a gay man, on the other hand this is such a good exploration of internalised homophobia and queer community dynamics and all that good stuff so I can forgive the girlboss vibes.

Catherynne M Valente - Space Opera

I nearly gave up on this so many times. Look, I love Eurovision, I love space, I very thoroughly enjoyed reading Douglas Adams as a teenager, so this should have been perfect for me. Unfortunately it was an unreadable mess and I hated every second I spent reading it.

Stephanie Julian - Hard Lines & Goal Lines

It must be hard writing romance because you need some sort of reason the characters can't be together and happy right from the start, like you need a plot, but whatever's getting in their way needs to also be something they can overcome by the end of the book. So sometimes that obstacle ends up being basically nothing, as it is in this book.

Emma Puikkonen - Lupaus (finnish)

Really enjoyed reading this one, but it was also a confusing reading experience for me as someone with eco-anxiety and no parental instinct, because I still found myself relating more to the parenting stuff than the eco-anxiety stuff. Anyway would absolutely recommend.

Sanni Purhonen - Jos vain muuttuisin toiseksi (finnish)

This is a poetry collection about disability which I actually passed on before because the blurb on the back cover does this zero justice. Publishers: get your shit together 2k23. Everyone who speaks finnish: read this.

Erik J Brown - All That's Left in the World

Okay I fuckin love disaster fiction. This ticked all my boxes: disaster survival, gay, included a map.

Marian Keyes - Again, Rachel

I am a Marian Keyes girlie and I also read Rachel's Holiday years and years ago (fun fact: my copy of Rachel's Holiday has a cover with a woman holding a drink on it and quotes about what a fun light read it is which, uh, well), and so I obviously needed to know if my blorbo was okay. The worst part of this book was a few days after I finished it, someone close to me went into a treatment centre for addiction and when I visited them it took so much willpower not to be like "oh I recently read a book about that".

Andy Weir - Project Hail Mary

Thought I might read another Andy Weir to see if the rest of his stuff was as good; it was alright, but I am not the target audience Andy Weir is writing to and that's fine. In my notes, I wrote that this book felt like "Arrival for men" and I stand by it.

Lily Lindon - Double Booked

The first I ever heard about this was someone saying "despite the concept it is not biphobic" like yeah okay fair, but also this book feels like the dictionary definition of gay and somehow homophobic? I think a "woman discovers she's queer, gets sucked into a specific community of toxic queer stereotypes and finally learns to accept herself and her bisexuality" story would be really great if any of the characters were the slightest bit sympathetic. Unfortunately the stereotypes are never really interrogated in any way, there's never a "oh actually there's more to being queer than this one specific club/scene" moment, and everyone's just kind of a dick lol. The main character never really puts in the work, so her ending feels unearned.

Kait Nolan - Our Kind of Love

Gonna be honest, typing this into the list I fully could not remember what this book was but then I remembered, it was the one with a content warning at the start for cursing and pre-marital sex, which is a fair enough warning but not one I recall seeing before. It's a sweet book, I liked it, but some of the characters were pretty one-dimensional.

Becky Chambers - A Psalm for the Wild-Built

This was lovely but also felt really unsatisfying somehow? Anyway I will read anything Becky Chambers writes, so.

Pauliina Haasjoki - Himmeä sininen piste (finnish)

Essays on climate change, the environment, etc. I came away from this book with a lot of thoughts and with a long list of books and movies to get my hands on.

Ali Hazelwood - Love on the Brain

Okay I fucking loved this one actually, this was even better than The Love Hypothesis. Sorry not sorry. Two notes though: 1) apparently the two main characters had a height difference of 40 cm and as someone who once dated a guy maybe 30 cm taller than me, I have to say the logistics of the kissing are not as simple as this book makes it seem, and 2) I don't like Ali Hazelwood's sex scenes at all rip.

Xiran Jay Zhao - Iron Widow

!!!!!!!!!

Alexandria Bellefleur - Written in the Stars

When will I escape the fucking Harry Potter references, if this wasn't a library book I would have set fire to it. That said, the rest of it was really nice, we love a little F/F fake dating opposites attract romance moment, although I can't speak to the quality of the sex scenes bcos I was reading this on the train sitting next to my mum so I kind of skipped those.

Miira Luhtavaara - Pinnallisuus (finnish)

Idk this had some fun visual stuff but mostly this was just like. Words. Apparently this is an award-winning poet but maybe I'm not cultured enough bcos I cannot understand why.

Jennette McCurdy - I'm Glad My Mom Died

The internet's been buzzing about this so much I had to read it despite barely knowing who Jennette McCurdy is; this was really good but also I felt so voyeuristic reading it like "noo I don't need to know this stuff about a complete stranger, why am I reading this" as if she didn't write it herself in a book for people to read.

Christina Sweeney-Baird - The End of Men

Based on the reviews etc that I read, I think that a lot of people (including the author) approached this book from a non-speculative-fiction background. I came to this book having read a) a bunch of disaster, incl. pandemic fiction and b) The Female Man by Joanna Russ and Ammonite by Nicola Griffith. So I understand that this was groundbreaking to some people, but to me it was a bit of a let-down. Obviously not every book has to add something new to its genre, but with feminist sci-fi I think I'd expect some awareness of genre, at least.

Also. If you don't know anything about genetics and infectious diseases, it's okay to not go into detail about them. I don't mind the idea of a vague nebulous disease that only kills men (as a plot device in fiction, I mean, I'm not buzzed about the idea in real life), I can suspend my disbelief. I stop being able to suspend disbelief when an author writes something this incredibly wrong.

Louisa M Alcott - Little Women

I watched the 90's adaptation recently bcos my man (John Neville) is in it so I figured I ought to read the book someday - I mean, I read some of it as a kid but I don't think I ever finished it - and honestly, I think child me was right bcos this book really isn't all that great.

Trish Milburn - A Cowboy's Kiss

I go on bookbub to look at my deals, I see the word "cowboy" and black out and the next thing I know that shit is in my google play library. ANYWAY. A librarian named Anna gets in an accident, and has to be looked after by a sexy doctor who is also a cowboy?? Sign me the fuck up.

Fiona MacArthur - Lacey

This was a pretty dull book and also loses so many points for the love interest being a cop, but you don't look a free ebook in the mouth.

Rachael Bloome - The Truth in Tiramisu

Another pretty meh romance.

Kerttu Kotakorpi - Suomen luonto 2100 (finnish)

A little prediction into what Finland might be like in the year 2100 as far as climate and weather go - an interesting read, for sure, if a bit depressing (:

Sari Elfving - Saattaja

Well. I liked the concept (1939, biology student doesn't get to go along on a research trip to find a butterfly she's interested in, war breaks out and she fakes nurse credentials to go serve in the war so she can see the butterfly), and I thought it was well-written, but I also just mostly did not like this book.

Martha Wells - All Systems Red (finnish translation)

I hate reading translations but sometimes needs must - this was sooo good oh my god. I need to read this entire series right now immediately thank you.

Lempi Nyyssönen - Taskukellon aikaa (finnish)

Was at grandma's, picked up one of the few poetry books she has, turns out this was written by her former neighbour. Not the most interesting poetry I've ever read tbh but also not the worst.

CJ Carmichael - Melt My Heart, Cowboy

A pretty good book about the friendship between Rosie, a writer/chocolate shop worker dealing with a big life change, and Sara Maria, a young autistic woman recovering from a breakdown and trying to find her own place in life without being defined by her family. Oh except it's actually a romance between Rosie and Brant, Sara Maria's brother and the cowboy of the title. It's just that he's the least interesting character in the book, and a bit of a dick, and even Rosie is like "why do I like this guy, he's a dick to his sister and he kind of sucks" sooo.

This book gets bonus points for Rosie finding out Sara Maria is autistic and her reaction being, and I quote, "like the Sheldon character on Big Bang Theory?"

Sangu Mandanna - The Very Secret Society of Irregular Witches

This was mostly Really Good except remember that thing I wrote before about having to write obstacles to romance that are exactly the right size? The obstacle in this one should have been too big, actually, holy shit.

Carina Taylor - Tuesdays Like That

This book has really fantastic dialogue. The rest of it isn't that great.

Holly Smale - The Cassandra Complex

I'm putting spoilers here bcos I would have wanted them myself: I was so distracted reading this bcos first a side character made some comment about Cassandra, the main character, being on the spectrum, I was like "oh is she autistic?" (yes) and when I figured she probably was my next question was "does she know she's autistic?" (no.)

I did enjoy the book though, would recommend.

Note: I have left three books off this list bcos some things are between me and God (or, as it happens, between me and Google Play Books which now knows too much about me). Anyway see you in six months for part two! :)

[insanityessays]

Sorry Shakespeare, Beetlejuice is better

Or: I aggressively compare things that could be tangentially related to my homework, but instead I'm just over-analyzing things to the point where I'm more or less rambling like an insane person.

You know what happens when you try to analyze Shakespeare’s Richard III while you’re hyper fixating on Beetlejuice (the musical, the musical, the musical)?

Well, if you’re anything like me, you end up drawing way too many plot comparisons and end up working on an analysis that you could never turn in for class credit because the analysis you came up with reads more like a conspiracy theory or a discussion than an actual essay.

So, despite the fact you have an actual essay to write, you need to get all of the thoughts you have in your brain down onto paper, then throw that paper into the void. On the plus side, because this isn’t a fancy-shmancy class essay, you get to write it the best way possible: really casually, with bad jokes, and not properly citing in MLA formatting because even though citation formatting makes sense it’s kind of a pain in the ass to complete. I also put in swear words because I can. This nonsense took me multiple hours to write. I do not regret a thing.

While I was reading Richard the Third, I realized that Richard is a lot like Beetlejuice. And then that sent me on a train of thought that led me to drawing more and more comparisons between the two. So here’s my very hastily written comparison between Shakespeare’s Richard III and Beetlejuice (the musical, the musical, the musical).

So there’s one really big similarity between the two characters that we can see from really early on in the play:

Everyone fucking hates them

To be fair, in both cases it’s understandable that these characters receive a lot of hate from every other character on stage. Lady Anne hates Richard because he murdered her husband and her son. Understandable. 

Beetlejuice didn’t do that (allegedly). The moment Barbra and Adam meet him, they’re just really creeped out. Beetlejuice hasn’t actually killed anyone (that we know of). He just really wants to.

“Oh, Babs, I would LOVE that. Nothing would give me more pleasure than to kill those people downstairs.” (I.v)

Both Richard and Beetlejuice then proceed to make a bunch of sex jokes.

This early in the story,  Richard is probably the more hateable of the two. That’s saying something, seeing as he’s up against a literal demon.

Richard is just a figurative demon (unless you’re interpreting the script in a really weird way, which then… good for you). 

Which is probably why the insults towards Richard are quite a bit more… intense… 

“Thou elvish-mark'd, abortive, rooting hog!

Thou that wast seal'd in thy nativity

The slave of nature and the son of hell!” (I.iii)

Meanwhile the worst that Beetlejuice has been called is a “needy pervert”. 

Okay, so maybe it’s not that fair to analyze the two of them side by side like this, mostly because Richard is way more despicable, and everyone hates him quite a bit more.

But I stand by my point- they’re kind of similar.

Richard’s opening soliloquy has him basically telling the audience “hey guys, I’m the really evil villain of the show. My intentions are to be very evil. Also no one loves me.” 

“And therefore, since I cannot prove a lover,

To entertain these fair well-spoken days,

I am determined to prove a villain

And hate the idle pleasures of these days.”

Which has a very similar feel to the DC version of the Invisible reprise.

“I WANT THE SAME THINGS AS YOU

TO BE SEEN THROUGH THE EYES OF LOVE

AND ALSO TO KILL LOTS OF PEOPLE

AND BASICALLY FUCK SHIT UP”

Those are basically the same if you ignore the differences. 

Both characters are demonic figures that can and will murder multiple people, both are quite evil, and both have a lot of soliloquies despite being a villainous character.

The key difference is their motivation.

It is very theater of a character to explicitly state their motivations to the audience (either through speech or song). That’s because understanding a character’s motivations is what drives the plot forward in basically any story. Just look at disney:

“I want adventure in the great wide somewhere”

“I wanna be where the people are”

“I wanna be like you”

Beetlejuice has motivations to be loved. He wants to interact with people, he wants to find friends, he wants to stop being ignored. The obstacle to this is that he’s an insecure guy who is also literally invisible for half of the show. Which is sad. It’s relatable to the audience. I relate to “wants love, bad at people” on a very personal level. If you look at the entire musical in that way, the whole thing makes sense.

Now let’s talk Richard III. What is his motivation? 

Without interpreting the character too much, there really isn’t much of a motivation there. He’s just evil for the sake of being evil. It isn’t really for love- in some ways he already has that. He gets a wife, his brother likes him, the children trust him, he has friends.

This is what really dampens the character of Richard III. I can’t relate to “I want murder” on a personal level. Arguably he’s motivated by fear for the second half of the play- he doesn’t want to lose what he has. But having half a play with no motivation for a main character? That’s stupid.

I’m sure that there are going to be people who are like, “he’s motivated by power” but to be honest, I’ve never really understood that. Power is a flimsy motivation. I want to dig deeper than that: why does this person want power? For Richard, there’s not much to go off of. The audience or the actors can interpret his interests, but there’s nothing (as far as I can tell) in the script itself to suggest his actions are fueled by anything.

So moving on in the story, both characters (kind of) get what they want at some point in the story. Richard is crowned king. Beetlejuice becomes alive.

When Richard becomes king, it’s a story of paranoia eating at him until he dies. Fun times.

When Beetlejuice becomes alive, he sort of ends up learning that he didn’t get what he wanted- for a reason. The things he thought he wanted weren’t what he actually wanted.

Sticking with the core motivation of “love” with Beetlejuice, it’s easy to see where each bit of his logic comes from. Mostly because he tells the audience exactly what he’s doing and why.

“Alone. Again. You know what it feels like

to get everything you thought you ever wanted, but still feel like no one

will every love you? This guy knows what I’m talking about, I gotta get

out of here! I need to really live, really connect! Everyone can see me

now, but if I were alive, I could get out of the house, meet my kind of

people. You know, socially liberal, but fiscally conservative. And there

is a way. All I have to do is convince Lydia to marry me.”

Essentially, he wants friends, so he needs to become alive. 

However, his plan to become alive involves tricking people and harming others- which is what leads to his death.

Which is where the redemption arc comes in. He realizes that you can’t make friends through murder. He stands up for the people he cares about, they kind of forgive him, then he leaves.

There’s a moment like that in Richard III.

Kind of.

“I shall despair. There is no creature loves me;

And if I die, no soul shall pity me:

Nay, wherefore should they, since that I myself

Find in myself no pity to myself?”

It’s the moment when he comes to a conclusion- no one likes him because he murdered a lot of people. The next act, he dies.

Isn’t that the most unsatisfying ending? He realizes that his actions were bad, and falls into this field of self hatred, then just kind of dies unceremoniously. It would probably have a greater effect if he hadn’t proclaimed himself a villain at the beginning of the play. He starts thinking himself a loathed villain, he ends thinking himself a loathed villain. 

Arguably, you could say that the play exists as Richard telling the story of his death, meaning that all of the soliloquies at the beginning of the play were made with the knowledge of what happens at the end of the play, and he comments on his existence as a villain in a form of regret for his actions. 

…Which might be how the audience is meant to interpret the play, as made more obvious by staging and acting choices.

I think I accidentally made myself interpret the play completely differently by accident?

But if that’s true, then Richard’s character is extremely weak for the beginning of the play. Without “evil” he has no motivation. With that, everything just becomes a very passive experience. If we have no idea why someone is doing something, there isn’t much drama to it.

I mean, you could argue that villains don’t need a reason to be evil. If we read Richard as the antagonist of the story then it’s a bit more acceptable that there isn’t much motivation.

That’s kind of the case with Juno in Beetlejuice. We don’t get the chance to explore her character very much, and she mostly serves as a final obstacle to defeat at the end of the story. In this way, Beetlejuice isn’t the main villain- even if he does evil things. 

So despite the fact that Richard has a ton of time on stage, and most of the choices are coming from him, and he speaks to the audience a lot, and his story is the one we follow; if we read Richard as an antagonist, the lack of a motivation makes sense.

But then I ask you who exactly is the protagonist of Richard III?

Well, maybe it doesn’t have one. It’s a weird play that focuses on a character who doesn’t have reasons for their choices- things just kind of happen. 

That’s a way to tell a story I suppose. While a lot of good stories are character-driven, it’s technically possible to write one without an active main character. Forcing Richard into that role makes the story not work very well, so why read the play that way? 

Maybe Richard III doesn’t need a main character that makes choices. Is that a terrible way to write a story? Yes.

Even if that is the case, Beetlejuice is still a better story. Because the actions of the characters actually make sense. There’s a part of Richard III that I haven’t covered yet.

Going all the way back to act 1, scene 2; Lady Anne insults Richard due to the fact that he killed her husband and her son. He ends up somehow convvincing her that even though he did murder people, it’s completely fine because he’s in love with her. Thus, the worst part of the play: SHE FALLS FOR HIM.

To begin, she gets mad at him for the whole murder thing. Richard claims he did not murder them, she calls him out on his bullshit. Then he makes a bunch of sex jokes. 

So Richard changes his tactic- he decides to claim that She’s technically at fault for the murder of her husband and son, due to the fact that he only murdered them so he could get close to her romantically. She spits at him, wishes him dead. So he hands her a knife and tells her to stab him. Lady Anne is not willing to do that. He gives her a ring. He pretends to want to repent, she leaves not as angry at him.

Which is the most infuriating scene in the entire play. Somehow, she ends up not wishing to murder him. Richard brags about it in a later soliloquy. 

“To take her in her heart's extremest hate,

With curses in her mouth, tears in her eyes,

The bleeding witness of her hatred by;

Having God, her conscience, and these bars

against me,

And I nothing to back my suit at all,

But the plain devil and dissembling looks,

And yet to win her, all the world to nothing!”

I’m 90% sure we are supposed to believe Richard during this soliloquy. Somehow, she fell for him in that scene.

Which is stupid. 

Why does she do that? Is it a trick? Unlike the end of Beetlejuice, where pretending to go along with the marriage plan led to his death, there seemingly aren’t consequences to this. It doesn’t lead to anything major happening to him.

On top of that, later she basically states that she did indeed end up falling for him:

“Within so small a time my woman’s heart Grossly grew captive to his honey words” 

Ugh, tell me this was written by a man without telling me this was written by a man.

Why on earth would she fall for the man that murdered her husband. It makes no sense.

Unlike Richard, Beetlejuice never receives actual romantic interest. He’s tricked into believing he is, and then gets killed. This makes sense, as he has threatened to kill (and has killed, in the DC version) people at this point. It would not make sense to fall in love with a person if they murder your family. This should be obvious, but apparently not to Shakespeare. 

Yes, I’m well aware that there are other themes in both shows. Beetlejuice is also about dealing with grief and moving on in life, Richard the Third is also about lying to people and trust. But when comparing the two similar characters and plot points, Beetlejuice (the musical, the musical, the musical) is much better at showing characters, making sense, and having a much more satisfying ending.

There’s also a giant snake.

[murderballadeer]

this is maybe the worst paper i've ever written even counting the one where i spent half of it just explaining the narrative of the guadalupan event in excruciating detail bc i had to make wordcount and my hamlet essay where i just strung together disjointed insights from lecture notes and added some purple prose here and there and somehow got a 95 bc the professor told us we could just use our lecture notes and not cite them and her lectures were mostly tangents anyway so she would read the essays and go wow good insight and it was her insight and then if you got creative with the wording she would be like wow great writing

[nikosasaki]

🦫 + Nico! (for the question dump part 3 ask btw!)

somehow nico is really developed despite the fact that I've barely written anything for her lol, wild;

their worst enemy.

john fucking walker because he sucks but in my rewrite he sucks arguably even more tbh,, she's literally never wanted to kill anyone as badly as she wants to kill him

their saddest moment.

it's the moment she chooses to betray karli, it's really upsetting for both of them but nico takes it the hardest bc she just really,, cannot stand by what karli is doing anymore despite caring about her so much

their first love.

god nico falls in love six times an hour basically, but the first person she ever said 'I love you' to was a boy from turkey that she went to college with,, he was very smart and handsome and they broke up very amicably and sometimes nico still misses his companionship, not in a romantic way but they just fit together very well

their happy place.

her home in france! it's a really nice countryside cottage and it's the only place she's ever managed to really feel at peace

do they believe in ghosts or not?

nah lol, she doesn't believe in anything she can't see

their favourite snack.

not nico secretly being a health freak but she loves snacking on small fruits and veggies lol, mainly cherry tomatoes and blueberries

their go-to method for letting off steam.

murder? no but like, nico is actual a really good communicator so she'll often try to talk about things when she has pent up feelings but otherwise,, violence

their type in a partner.

strong people,,, big beefy strong people (but generally she's attracted to kind-hearted people and intelligence lol)

if they have a lucky object.

she has her lucky pen!! she wrote all of her college tests and essays with it and it's one of those superstition things where she refuses to write or sign important stuff with any other pen

their star sign.

my baby is an aries ♈

send me 🦫 + and oc and I'll answer these random questions!

[gretavanfleetposts]

Hi there! Can I request a ship, please?

I'm 5'11" with shoulder-length reddish-brown hair and blue/grey eyes. I'm mid-size, a little more on the chubbier side, with stretchmarks pretty much everywhere (hips, thighs, arms, stomach) which is something I'm rather insecure about. But, I'm slowly learning to love myself, and I'm actually enjoying the trip? From self-hatred to self-love? (Greta Van Fleet low-key has a little bit to do with it, because the way women are written about in their lyrics? Low-key motivating lol.)

Anyway, moving on. I have an intense love of true-crime (those documentaries on Netflix? I've watched just about all of them. And I watch them before bed, because they somehow relax me??) I read alot, and I like to collect little things like ribbons and buttons, despite being a few months shy of twenty. I also really like pressing flowers.

I like to go on random walks, I just put my headphones in and leave my house, then see where I end up. My music taste is all over the place; Motley Crue, Elvis, Doris Day, Hozier, Whitney Houston, The Beatles, Greta Van Fleet (of course), Elton John, The Lumineers. Basically, whatever comes on the radio or in a shopping centre, I'll probably listen to and enjoy.

I have an eight year-old golden labrador named Gypsy (she's technically the family dog.) My dream for when I have my own place is to have a big German Shepherd named Ares after the Greek God of War (because I'm super into Greek mythology lol.)

The first time I heard The Rain Song, I cried. The thunder at the end really just brought it home for me. I just really fucking love the rain.

My favourite season is Winter, I love being cold?? It just gives me an excuse to curl up under a chunky blanket with a cup of coffee and just stare out the window or read or listen to music.

A few random things about me:

- I've always wanted to learn how to swing dance, but there's no opportunities for me to learn where I live (which sucks)

- I once studied (and wrote three essays for) the connections between Greek and Roman gods/goddesses for, like, fun?

- I really, really long-ass drives (I'm talking four hours+) just because I can listen to music and not have to think about anything except getting where I'm going

My ideal date would be... Honestly, just spending the night in, doing some self-care (face masks with any of the boys would definitely be fun), sitting on the back porch, huddled up next to one another, just talking about anything and everything. My love language is touch, so like, being able to feel that the other person is really there with me, that they're real and not just some form of imagination, is really important to me because I sometimes freak out and am unable to differentiate between reality and imagination sometimes?

My favourite song at the minute is probably Dancing In The Street by David Bowie & Mick Jagger OR Nobody by Hozier. And my favourite movie is Good Morning, Vietnam starring Robin Williams.

I'm extremely introverted, have been all my life, to the point that (now that I've graduated) I have no friends. And I'm honestly, surprisingly, incredibly fine with that? Like, I used to think being alone was the worst thing that could happen to me, but now that I've started taking better care of myself and not bothering with what others think of me, I'm enjoying living alot more than I ever have?

My room is kinda chaotic, there's posters everyhwere, nothing really matches, frangipani or jasmine incense is just about always burning, there's three bookshelves, two guitars, and a ukulele. And yet, it's really clean, despite the amount of stuff I own?

I think I've carried on enough, now haha. I hope this is the sort of thing you were asking for.

Anyway, have an awesome day!

Hey sweet thing!!! ❤: First of all i loved this request! You seem like such a sweet and beautiful person! I love that you are learning to love yourself, i'm also on that journey, it's a hard one but worth it! Stretch marks are just a reminder that you're always growing and changing and moving into new seasons of life which is how it's supposed to be! Proud of you! You sound like such an intelligent person, mythology is so interesting and it's so so cool that your hobbies keep your mind sharp! You definitely have a friend in this blog and this fandom!!

Ship: Danny ⚡

Because: I think Danny would definitely match your energy really well and frankly I feel like he would be one of the only ones that could sit still on long road trips haha. I think that you and Danny would share the same sentiment for interior design! I feel like he would love that look with all the posters and instruments everywhere, im sure he will add some plants as he definitely gives plant dad vibes. He is one to pick up on your little quirks, and find it absolutely adorable. He'll bring you various flowers from the places he's visited for you to press. I think you two would be the quiet couple that everyone thinks is adorable!

Scenario:

Your birthday was coming up

Daniel was very excited

He kept asking you what you wanted

You said nothing big, just to be with him and your loved ones

"hmmmm" he'd say, "okay, nothing big, i promise"

The morning of, you woke up to the smell of pancakes and coffee wafting in to your bedroom from the kitchen

You smiled into your pillow

Spoiling you already

You pulled the covers back and sat up

Fresh flowers in a vase were placed on your bedside table with a card gingerly leaned against it

"Happy Birthday my love" was scrawled on it

You hugged the note to your chest

Teary eyed already and it was only 10am

You made your way downstairs

A shirtless Daniel was turned away from you, spatula in hand

The table was spread with your favourite fruit, various pancake toppings, bacon, eggs, coffee, and more flowers for the center of the table

You quickly snapped a picture of this moment before he noticed you were downstairs

You didn't want to forget this

You walked up behind him and snaked your arms around his torso

"BABE! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" He'd say excitedly

You laughed and thanked him

He lead you to your chair and you sat down in front of this breakfast feast

You both took your time eating, talking, laughing

Once you were full you thanked him with a kiss, you told him this was the best birthday ever

He looked at you confused, "Um it's only just started"

He told you to get dressed for a day out, that was the only hint he gave

You slipped on a cute sundress and sandals

He told you how beautiful you looked before walking you to the car

The drive was short

A close city park with many benches and lots of grass

He took your hand after helping you out of the passenger seat

Soon you saw the familiar faces of your 3 best friends sitting on a large sprawled out blanket

Your face beamed

"Happy birthday!!!!!" They screamed

Danny turned to you

"I have one last surprise"

Josh turned and picked up a cardboard box, placing it at your feet

"You said nothing big so"

You bent down to open it

To your utter surprise, a small, energetic bundle of fur leaped out into your arms

You were shocked, a German Shephard, just the one you've always wanted

"Meet Ares" Danny said, bending down to pet your new puppy

You were speechless

You grabbed your boyfriend's face and planted a kiss on his lips

You couldn't be happier

The five of you spent the rest of the day playing with Ares until the sun started to set

You wouldn't want to spend your birthday any other way

Thank you for the support! I hope you liked it!

-🌙

ships are closed!

[knee-breeches]

So I've noticed how much you love James Madison (I do too!) and was wondering if you had any opinions on a biography of him and Dolley. It's by a man named Bruce Chadwick and I'd love to get it but I've heard mixed things about accuracy. Could you possibly clear things up so I know whether or not it's a good read? If not that's fine. Would you know of any good recommendations? Thank you!!!

I have read many essays and biographies about James Madison, and that book, beyond a shadow of a doubt, is the worst I’ve ever read.

Here are excerpts of a review I wrote on it back when I first finished it:

...with dense composition on every page and repetitive analyses from time to time, it often felt as though the author wanted to bolster the wealth of information between James and Dolley Madison by inserting filler to increase the page count. Either the editor was in a hurry or dead, because the entire novel was laced with intermittent grammatical and spelling errors (how many times Chadiwck flipped between spelling it "Dolley" and "Dolly" was incalculable); not to make like Chadwick and repeat my complaint of repetition.

  The author's elucidations of certain details occasionally had me questioning his credibility...  one of the first that comes to mind is the mention, of some point, of James Madison returning to Montpelier while his father "was in his eighties"...James Madison, Sr., died when he was seventy-eight years old. Another section of the book talked at length about James Madison's insistence on federal subsidization of roads and canals when every other biographer would claim to the contrary that Madison, hidebound, refused to allocate the federal government with power to fund any sort of internal improvement except for postage. Toward the end, there was mention of slave Sukey inquiring of Madison what the matter was when the latter couldn't swallow, while it was actually a niece of Madison's that had asked this question; while some of these errs are trivial details, it's a wonder that a writer who desires to capture the lives of two very important historical and political figures in American history would somehow manage to be so unthorough as to make mistakes that casual studiers of history would not. Another thing, Chadwick kept saying that Madison's eyes were hazel; I myself have heard conflicting records of his eye color (although his portraits usually show a dull blue or grey) but Chadwick didn't show any cognizance of this conflict, which ordinarily I wouldn't have batted an eyelash at, except he also included a contemporary description from Edward Coles who had described Madison's eyes as blue. It's not that tiny detail itself so much that bothers me, but more that it's a representation of the inconsistencies and misinformation found for the entire duration of the book. [Like?  Did Chadwick write the entirety of his own book?]

 I also dwelled for a long time on how I disliked what, at the time, I thought was Chadwick’s mishandling of the issue of slavery as it pertained to Madison and his involvement (or lack thereof), but that’s more arbitrary and controversial, and because it’s been a while and my views have changed, I won’t go into it here.  Just know that, regardless of how you feel about slavery and how the Founders dealt with it, it was analyzed with laughable lack of eloquence or examples/substantiation in this book.  But then again, everything is.

Looking back on it, I think there are some things in there that Chadwick threw in on assumption or things that he just made up.  I remember there was one part where he talked about how Madison and Dolley used to argue about her turbans, but I have never before or since seen or heard anything from another source mentioning this, and it would surprise me if somebody as blatantly unthorough as Chadwick accumulated historical details that a myriad of other biographers missed.  I’m not saying new information doesn’t pop up and that I know everything there is to know, but it’s an example of how dubious any of Chadwick’s information is because so much of what he says is either wrong or not backed by anything at all.

Anyway, there are some decent-ish things about the book.  It had one of the better accounts on the War of 1812 that I’ve come by in a Madison biography (his biographers always breeze over it for some reason), and has a good plethora of more minute physical descriptions, which is something I personally like in historical nonfiction.  But the things that are bad about it--redundancy, pacing, spelling, grammar, inaccuracy--aren’t made up for by the couple of okay aspects.

Over all, it’s just a carelessly-written book.  It’s impossible to cite because there are so many silly mistakes and unabashed non-facts that a casual reader could never know what’s true and what’s not.  I would never recommend this to (anybody, but especially) a person who’s not already very well-acquainted with the Madisons because they’ll walk away with a wealth of misinformation and contradictions.

If you’re interested in a decent piece on James and Dolley jointly, I recommend Mr. and Mrs. Madison’s War by Hugh Howard.   It’s obviously focused more on the War of 1812 than a thorough recount on the subjects’ lives and relationship, but there is still great content to that end, plus a better look into the War that the Madisons played such a huge role in, which, again, most Madison biographers tend to overlook.  

So yeah, please don’t buy the book.  Unless you’re specifically looking for an example of a piss-poor biography.

[bascojinn]

Would you mind if I used your post about Luna's design as reference for my essay? I've written a quick draft about it even before reading your post. Okay, we have Tifa, Lightning, and Prompto who somehow had undergone facial redesign (wut?) for reasons, but Luna is the worst. I guess Luna is the most inconsistent character I've ever seen, facial-wise and personality-wise. Btw, I also want to thank Sai for this. I thought I was the only who noticed the problem.

Of course,  you can use my post. Also, I have post about redesigns from Versus XIII to XV. Every character was changed during development process a lot.