#not putting in main tags bc. Yknow heavy stuff

[surveillance-0011]

Got any angst-y HCs?

Oh hell yeah man. Plenty. I’ll start with the less sad ones and put the outright triggering ones below the read more

At times Val (my nickname for the timpanist) feels that he’s the least important or most overshadowed of the three, and worries about being replaceable or nothing special. I wouldn’t call him unremarkable but he probably would, seeing himself as just another guy living a normal life (note: He Is Not.). That and the other two are just… total characters who do get more attention at times so he just. Silently watches from the sidelines and hopes that someone’s rooting for him, too.

The other two rlly don’t help him feel less inadequate either. He hasn’t told either of them about this mild but possibly growing insecurity but the other two are very good at unintentionally making people feel bad. The Cellist is so stubborn and set on their vision that they can push other people away or talk down to them a little. And the DJ can’t participate in any conversation without teasing or outright insulting someone. So Val generally feels unappreciated and like the other two think he’s stupid or something.

There’s been a couple occasions where they contemplate if this whole thing is worth it but in the end their role means a lot to others and even themselves. Cellist wanted to express their emotions and make a point. The Timpanist wanted to inspire others. The DJ wanted an audience of people who wouldn’t tell them what they’re doing is stupid, that they should just give up… and all three have gotten what they wanted.

That isn’t to say it’s without its troubles and just how healthy and worth it all this really is debatable bc they’ve been pretty damn mean to each other and there’s a lot of stress…

But it’s not like they’re the source of all that for each other. Their role is very important so the stakes are pretty high, not to mention just how stressful it is when Grizzco is working to steal everything from you… it’s been hard for all three of them

Val has lost brothers and friends to Grizzco’s employees. He puts on a brave face but it hurts. He’s mainly just pushed himself to work harder, to really help the cause and distract him from his own grief. To make him feel less guilty for playing from the sidelines. To stop feeling like it should have been him, up against the inkfish who don’t play fair. Who ride on explosive inflatables and crustacean shaped tanks. Who would shoot the Mothership out of the sky, if they could. Who use their fancy weapons to mow down all they see…

The Cellist, too, has lost acquaintances and even some closer friends. He’s only been fortunate from his absence and distance from others. That doesn’t make it easier. Times are tough. If it were just him, maybe he could bear it better, but he knows damn well it’s affecting the other two and that he can’t do anything to protect them. It’s… horrible. Debilitating, demoralizing. He cannot hide it, but he can’t really talk about it. He doesn’t want to burden the other two, they’re so young, they shouldn’t have to see him like this… Like the drummer, in the end all that can be done is to make more music, play the best they can. If anything, though, he does it because he feels in this world he may be running out of time. That, and it is really just his one true outlet…

The DJ hasn’t really yet, but the strain isn’t relieved. They know that whenever they go out there, they or someone they care about could die. Of course, salmonids do not really fear death, but they’re young and honestly, no bravery in the face of this disaster changes the fact that Grizzco’s disregard for the cycle of life is dangerous and terrifying. The distress from seeing what they’ve seen and just knowing the risk of doing what they do has led to anxiety. Panic attacks, they had one of their first mid performance. They’re happening more often. They’re not sleeping well. They’re agitated, restless, and maybe they flame, that spark they had, it’s going out…

I will say that I think late 2019-21 were probably the worst years for the DJ and maybe the band as a whole but I’m gonna wait and see what info we get from the official Twitter next to figure out how they’ve changed and whatnot. However I’d like to believe in current time they’re on the upswing even as things are dire.

Speaking of the DJ: major parental issue haver here. Their dad is out of their life and they’ve been trying to steer clear of their mother for a couple years now. She wasn’t necessarily cruel but they fought a lot bc she wasn’t the most supportive and it got to a point where DJ just said “Fuck it I’m leaving” and went out to pursue their epic high school (or college?? Still iffy on my age hc for em) dropout music career

The mom wants back in though so now they’re contemplating whether it’s worth it to try and reconnect. The other two have advised them to at least try (Val bc he’s very family oriented and can’t imagine someone not wanting their family in their life and the Cellist bc it’s better to at least tie up any loose ends so they can both get on with their lives)

They also have a sister who they have a very-up-and-down relationship with. They do both like bonding over hating their dad and not knowing what to do about their mom tho.

Not rlly angst?? But Val dated said sister at some point and it… uh. It was something for sure.

More distressing hcs below cut. TW for sh and talk of suicide, and also hypothetical character death situations

I’ve said this before I think but the Cellist is nd + mentally ill and has struggled a lot with this. A lot of it comes and goes in waves, but he’s doing ��relatively well? The band isn’t always good for his mental health but it’s also been a great outlet for a lot of his emotions and inner turmoil

They’ve struggled with… a lot of things. Insecurity, isolation, anxiety etc etc etc… and their stubbornness mostly bc music has really been their only consistent way of communication and coping, and what they mean to say few their music is a deeply personal mission that they do not want to be hijacked by someone else.

And yes, they’ve struggled with self harm and suicidal thoughts, the latter of which have lead to a couple of attempts of varying severity. Mainly when they were younger, from their older teens to their 30s, but the thoughts and urges have never really left completely. They’ve been clean from deliberate self harm (unfortunately meltdowns still bring unintentional sh) for quite some time, though.

They’ve told the other two about some of their struggles but never about the self harm and attempts.

And yes, that one off thing I said abt the DJ telling the cellist to off himself one time… that wasn’t a hypothetical that did end up happening at one point. The DJ was unaware of all of this (not like that makes it an ok thing to say) and basically blurted it out, something he doesn’t mean but didn’t think would hurt too bad…

It did. He’s not sure if he’s ever seen him so hurt before.

It’s probably the closest the band has gotten to breaking up, it took months for them to reconcile . The DJ is still surprised that the Cellist forgave them. Doesn’t matter if they weren’t thinking, who says that and gets away with it?

The Cellist is still a little upset with them because of how personal the subject is and whatnot but in the end the music and making sure this stupid fucking kid end up with a good head on their shoulders (and the actual stupid fucking kid in question) means a lot to him sooo he’s not gonna stop participating in the best thing that’s ever happened to him bc some people are brain poisoned from the internet.

The band would probably break up for good if any of them died, since they see each other as irreplaceable. That and they’d be torn bc as much as they argue and kind of hate each other they’re friends in their own fucked up fishy way and have grown to care deeply for one another.

I’m under the impression that they do not really battle since they’re the band and not necessarily soldiers but they might… idk how salmonid army works :) but that means most likely of one were to die it would be in the crossfire of the Salmon Run, if not something like illness or an accident

If the Cellist were to die the other two would be crushed and the band would most definitely not go on. I don’t think it’d hit them right away they’d be shocked and act like it never happened. Until it finally clicks. Then both of them would really not know what to do with themselves. They both really look up to him in the end and see him as a mentor or whatnot. At least they’d have each other as a shoulder to cry on but it’d be hard.

Unless he killed himself. If that were the case I think the other two would probably blame themselves or each other and not want to see the other

If the Timpanist died the DJ would fare the worst. Obviously both would be devastated but Val and DJ are closer bc of their age and Val not taking what they say as personally and also just being the closest thing they had to like. A good trustworthy friend. Once again they’d try to be there for one another but I could the the DJ withdrawing more in their grief. I could also see the Cellist seeing the loss as a failure on their behalf, not keeping him safe, not being able to make it better for him. At least the both of them could know Val was brave. Whatever takes him out, he’s not gonna go gently into the night, I’ll tell you what.

If the DJ died I think that’d be worst case scenario for the mental-emotional fallout. They’re too young to go, never even saw much combat time if any, barely lived. And they’d be scared. So scared. Wounded or sick they’d cling on, fight as hard as they could, to the bitter end. And it would just destroy the other two. Val loses his best friend, and the Cellist loses this kid that he cared a lot about. Like with Val, if DJ were to die he’d blame himself, and more so in this situation. Everything is a reminder, and every reminder hurts like hell… maybe the cellist would even take the DJ up on that old, stupid offer they made…

[preycodedd]

about + byf + dni

THIS IS THE MAIN BLOG FOR OUR SYSTEM. WE WILL LIKELY HAVE SIDEBLOGS FOR SPECIFIC ALTERS TO POST THEIR OWN FREAK STUFF. WE'LL LINK ONES BELOW IF THE SPECIFIC ALTER IS COMFORTABLE SHARING. DNI: -(BODILY) MINORS -PRO-CONTACT HARMFUL PARAS -BASIC DNI (t3rfs, n4z1s, all the -ists and -phobics, yknow!) -SYSCOURSE (we will NOT be sharing much info about our stances, but anyone is free to interact and we will simply block if we're uncomfortable. we are traumagenic personally, but syscourse just stresses us out a bit. so like. don't bring that stuff here) ---- regarding our dni, we will block freely and as much as we want. we know dnis aren't super helpful, but we might as well put it here anyways. we know how to regulate our online experience, you should regulate yours too. block us if you don't like our posts or stances. BYF: -we will post about a lot of heavy k!nkz possibly including but not limited to: cnc, cannibalism, somno, age gap, extreme violence, _cest, etcccc. just be warned man!! everything we put here is safe sane and consensual or completely fantasy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! also we'll prolly post animalistic stuff. we enjoy knots okay. MAYBE some objectum posting but we might use a sideblog for that. we'll likely tag stuff that is intense! -we're cool with anyone over 18+ sending asks or dming us :3 -if youre worried abt following bc we dont post abt smthn that ur super into, try it anyways! we'll jus block if we're v uncomfy but we do not have much limit or uncomfort wise and don't judge if you're into smthn we're not. ABOUT: -u can call us prey for now!!! preysys or whatever works too. -we are bodily 22, alters of differing ages will be posting here or on their own blogs tho! we have some Old Mfs -collectively we are comfortable with he/it/they pronouns. we love neos and will likely post using them sometimes B) -we are taken, by a WONDERFUL AND LOVING PSYS!!!!<333 we're also VERY poly, queer, and luv to snatch up labels tht feel comfortable for us. most of us r cool with "bi with a masc lean" tho -fictive heavy with a low split tolerance so if u hate fictives this aint the place to be bro -nonhuman, objectum, furry, freak all around -we will sexualize systemhood n u can't stop us

we'll add more as we deem fit but we're blurry rn and i cant add more - ALL WRITTEN BY .. I WILL CALL MYSELF ROCK FOR NOW. ALL WRITTEN BY ROCK AND THE REST OF THE SYS WILL HATE ME FOR IT (edited by red. i hate this)