#not now daddy kitten's getting vored

[terroreigns]

@distortedkilling asked the Troupe:

"Herba." Ah, hell. She was ignoring him again. That was fine, of course. He had the time. Holding his arms out to his sides, Mahito silently airplaned his way over to catch up to the plant woman. Not enough to walk side by side, just enough to lurk behind her as he so often enjoyed. Mismatched eyes raked over her form from behind with enough intensity for her to likely know he was staring. Contemplating. Figuring out his angle for how to bother her (beyond just existing).

Hands clasped behind his back. "Herba." He called her name again, nearing a whine at this point as he did a little wiggle that was reminiscent of Oscha's habit. When that didn't work he grew all the more restless and with an abrupt motion, unclasped his hands and brought them together in front of himself in a loud clap.

"Herba!" No, he wasn't intending to stop. Even as they passed by where Anarchy sat atop their throne, Mahito followed her past the open door like a petulant child. "Herbaaaaaaaa--" He called with indignation at her silent treatment. Yet there was a sly grin upon his face, knowing she did not have the patience to keep this up.

The curse even so much as appearing from the woodwork was enough to tense the Verdanian's muscles, fists clenched theatrically and thorns out like a kitten's claws. All that was missing was a hiss as the scientist moved at an accelerated pace, not daring to look behind her. Don't feed it attention, she thought, biting a painted lip.

When it came to Herba, she was well aware how deeply painful a lack of attention could be, meaning she was set to inflict just that. If Anarchy was going to ignore her just to play with the fleshy wretchling, well, then she was going to ignore Mahito in turn.

A foolproof plan, surely. (And not at all a tall order for a naturalborn yapper.) Shivers traveled down her trunk at her name being called - defiled by that ugly voice of his. Just... don't acknowledge him - it - whatever. With a scowl and a furrowed brow, Herba took a sharp left, turning towards the main walkway. A devious plan already hatching in her mind, spring returned to her step as she headed straight towards the Troupemaster's chamber.

CLAP!

She jumped. Satisfaction from the cursed spirit was all but palpable in the air, but she was not about to let Mahito keep one up over her. She deliberately slowed down in front of the entrance to the throneroom. Notice her, dammit. The God of Joy spared a glance. Herba smiled.

...The God of Joy then proceeded to ignore her and wave at Mahito, which pissed her off even further, if such a deed was still possible.

But oh, it was. And Herba's rage knew no dam save for her own ill-fated hubris.

"I'm going to murderize you." The woman grumbled, quiet enough only for herself to hear.

Accelerating again - a near-sprint which was sure to entice the predatory spirit - Herba slipped into one of the back tents, before abruptly stopping. A vermilion eye glimmered in the dark, sharp and stark against the deep shade of the chamber.

"Now you've gone and done it! You've made me maaad, so I hope you enjoy it while you still can! Hydrangea! Come to momma!"

Hydra - what?

A giant, three-headed plant beast extended its girthy necks from the black void of the ceiling, wasting no time in trying to swallow Mahito whole.

Meanwhile, Herba herself was already skittering off for fear of her dear life.

[keroseneinhalers]

5 and 1 AWOOGA 😍😍😩🙏🙌💖

okay five is done and one will be posted with the poor anon that encouraged me here u go:

dream (no longer a catboy!!) hugger his beautiful husband the onceler. he was so happy. he had just kicked gogy out for trying to get them involved in a multilevel marketing scheme. it was hard losing such a long time friend but it was worth it to preserve his marriage. as a recovering sugar daddy, learning to keep his wallet closed was the most important step in his rehabilitation (just last week he only gave gogy $5000!!! nature is healing!!! good job girlboss!!!).

now he could focus on his marriage with his beloved capitalist egirl dilf one percenter husband. hed drifted off a while ago, dreaming of that time he was a worm and got eaten (which was just a dream. canonically. vore isn’t real if it’s a dream. the more u know!) but he was roused by a loud noise in the other room. he yawned, doin the classic hero reaches over to find their lover missing nd panics scene. holy shit drem u just lost another eboy. drem was panicking now. where was his love bug? his sugar pie? his gummy bundle? his wittle money kitten?

getting up and stepping over sapnaps air mattress (homewreckers don’t get beds! try and steal my man again slut!) he made his way towards the living room, rubbing his eyes as he stepped into the brightly lit room.

“babe? what’s going on? you woke me up.”

no answer.

panicking, dream looked around. the living room was a MESS. shit was everywhere. it was like sharknado but with household items.

“Oncie? Honey? sugar bear?!” dreamie was panicking now, what if the eco mafia (the lorax got tired of being peaceful hes a based girlboss now) had kidnapped oncie after they burned down the amazon rainforest together. grabbing his glock, dream prepared to do what he had to do. for oncie.

As he hurried around the mess, trying to find his custom kevlar vest (neon green is an expensive color) he saw a note tapped to the front door.

the handwriting was familiar. too familiar.

stepping closer, dream tore the note of the door, fuming. had they made his husband write his own ransom? fucked up if true.

deer baby cakes.

i know u and and my dummy thicc ass just got back together, but i have to do this. george says if i sign on now i get an extra tote back. besides it’s not a pyramid scheme it’s multi level marketing and once you get to diamond blue gold tier III you get a free airplane ticket to brazil! you know i love brazil!

see u laterz honey bumpkins!!

— ur sugar pie, oncie

Sapnap, who had followed him into the room, judged patted his shoulder solemnly.

“The gogy got him. he’s strong. he’ll come back.”

dream just sobbed into his spare stack of 100 dollar bills. fucking gogy and his multi level marketing scheme.

[rynn-png]

Some more CW: cursing,sexual themes and mentions of mental illness

P.S: green

197:just do not

198:token mentally stable friend

199:he didn’t get mesmerized by ass he’s gay (/j)

200:HIS NAMES KAI HES TRANS

201:who hurt you? Olive oil

202: This whole generation is fucked so why don’t we get fucked in style

203:anyways I wanna die 😜 (this ones so cringe sorry)

204:I’m sorry you might have broken your arm and your mum won’t be back in two hours so here’s a moaning fish emoji to cheer you up

205:I would throw my baby at you

206: She looks possessed in a cute way

207: I am immune to the mortal desire to simp

208: I headcannon him as an alcoholic

209: do you like cults?

210:may they rest in hell

211:I am going to throw water bottles at you

212: I want to throw that child out the window (boo, tomato,tomato,)

213: Stfu :]

214: Wait who’s the pussy fart and who’s the pussy fart in the relationship

215: *elegantly fans out fan*

216: His hair?fuck no.his face?I’ve seen pickles that look more handsome

217: Wait who’s the kitten now?

218:wow you must either life a sad life or have a fucked sleep schedule or in my case both

219: Why has everyone labeled me as a manipulative bitch cus of the month I was born in

220:shit up your jar of roasted cashews

221: ✨ Milfs ✨

222: twosday didn’t land on a Wednesday for me and now I’m sick🥰😍😍😘😘😘😘

223: my kidneys are not slaying fucking help

224: THE AROS AND ACES WILL TAKE THE ROMOS AND PENETRATED HOLOS AND MAKE IT PLATONIC

225: You’re a cool kind of bitch he’s a bitchy bitch so don’t worry

226:Sans x Garfield 4life

227: I just wheezed…..am i a Weezer

228: you chihuahua ass bitch

229: well fuck me in Spanish and call me daddy duo

300: *angry hon’s* -17:14

153: *remastered* nyehehe body dysphoria my arch nemesis

301: Omfg I should make a y/n x Weezer fic

302: Honestly tired of writing in English google translate will be your new friend

303: Hopefully i’ll have Velcro balls soon

304: Allo people scare me

305: *slides in and trips platonically* hey B]

306: YAY ITS THE GAY MF’S

307: poppy stinky alert 🥺🥺🥺

308: phantom penis my beloved

309: cannibalism I love it 👍

310: I COULD HAVE SENT SHREK VORE

311: TW: homosexuality

312: L-L-L-Llyodie poo 🥺🥺🥺

313: FUCKING DAHR MAN IN MY DREAM IS NOT LUCKY

314: I would tell you the most colourful of curses that a pride parade would look dull

315: sans has no reproductive organs,no skin,no dick,no balls and definitely no bitches

316:I bet it tastes like blue

317: Brain queer-both confused and gay

318:thanks I can hit people better with this

319: gay trashcans :00

320: Omfg am i really questioning the meaning of life over material girl being a dead meme

321: nothing is timeless the only mercy we have is the blissful release of death….damn I turned emo

322: LMFAOOOO HEADBANGING RN

323:shit on my eyes baba grill

324: Kurac, definition: A DICK A COCK A MANHOOD A ROD A CUM SHOT THE PEE AIMER A MEMBER A TARGET HITTER A SPERM DELIVERY

325: now you do as I say or *spits lemon threateningly*

326: I fucked genders mother

327:KEEP THE GAY COMING

328: GOD BALLS_HAVER YET HAD NO BALLS

These would be amazing shit posts on their own

Here’s more things I said @seabunnythatlikeshorror

Tw mentions of suicide (yes I cope with humour why do you ask?)

135:tumblr is like the NYC of apps

136:love the homocidal vibes

137:you are not queer unless you used Tumblr at least once

138:sorry was laughing at my dumb ass sister

139:thanks me I knew I made a good decision to hate you

140:I haven’t eaten this good since the last day of school party

141:you’re the main character and take that as an insult

142:I’m abt remake the bible with ATLA characters

143:sleep tight don’t survive the night

144:he looks like he’s abt to say “I’m a big boy and big boys don’t cry”

145:can I freestyle about suicide?

146:can we not mention Bruce Wayne’s Emo and I’m 37 and this is deep phase thank you

147:my asexuality said no

148:if my Pinterest page doesn’t turn out like that I will commit arson

149:I don’t understand jack shit and I don’t want to

150: No, just gonna feel bad for your older self having to deal with that while trying to sleep at 1 am

151: Gonna go pray what ever the fuck that was away

*101:you know I have the pain tolerance of a youngest sibling

*108:im about to do something called a “fuck you move”

152:finally geometry has a good use

153:nyehehe body dysmorphia my arch nemesis

154:if she cuts me with that voice it would be smooth like butter

155:so you’re a simp (unlike most of these I said that irl)

156: You might be less mentally ill but at least I’m older

157:I want to gag him and not the Doja Cat way

158:she’s adorable being crushed flat

159:and you didn’t even say “bad night”

160:I hope my hamster poops on you

161:it’s like thanos

162:I deep throated a camera

163:I accidentally spat on my own face

164: I just realized something, full on Mental instability is imaging your fav characters in a music vid instead of yourself

165:your honour…they’re gay

166:don’t think you’re hot shit when you aren’t even a shit

167:damn he be rocking that my chemical romance fit tho

168:am I a furry?

169:where can I find mascara that stays after death

170:I trust him cus he screams and I kin that

171:it’s hard being a main character okay

172: eyyy * i-need-therapy-finger-guns*

173: ✨ arson✨

174:and gulag is gulag

175:Tito president of Yugoslavia my beloved

176:you made one mistake there, it’s thinking I understood anything (said that to my math teacher)

177:it’s a minion flute want me to play something on it?

178:its too early anytime for everything

179:but who’s gonna be the poop?

180: But they’re cute and traumatized

181:not attracted you mentally unstable sicko’s

182:I’m an ok sign away from killing myself

183:her existing is some sort of phobic

184:just be careful gaslighting girlbossing and gatekeeping

185: okay lover mustard’s

186:this could be an album cover in a bad way

187:he’s my fav gender

188:I found a telatubbies fic at one am again

189:not in an among us way

190:don’t ask if I have a life

191:you yawn in German

192:MY SLINKY DOESNT SLINK

193:what does support even do in rpg games? Be a therapist friend

194: What deserved that reaction the Sam and max vore or the Freddy x chucky cheese

195: another day another gay

196:why *do* birds sing so gay