#not like. the trials n shit that's def very self-sacrificing and sam of him

[good-things-do-happen-dean]

don’t mind me, just having a full on breakdown about 2x03 bloodlust vs 8x09 citizen fang. (made EVEN WORSE by ty olsson being one of the vamps in 2x03. like, eli is very different from benny, but still.)

in bloodlust, dean is adamant about wiping out the nest. he’s getting this all or nothing good vs evil, human vs supernatural idea from gordon (because he’s looking for a father figure in the wake of john’s death) and he’s absolutely CONVINCED that vamp=evil=must die. there’s no gray area here. which i kind of get (even though dean is definitely wrong about this) because at this point? they’re young. they don’t know any trustworthy supernatural beings. (they don’t know many trustworthy humans.) they’re fresh off john’s death, who also had gordon’s mindset (going so far as to ORDER HIS CHILD TO SHOOT HIM because he was possessed. and yes, azazel definitely was evil=must die, but still.)

but sam doesn’t buy this. this nest is peaceful. they drink cow blood and it’s disgusting, but they don’t kill humans. sam and dean could and should leave them alone. what harm are they doing? even though he doesn’t really even know them! early sam (and late sam too, idk wtf happened in the middle, see more below) is so much about hope and redemption and kindness.

AND YET. in citizen fang, this is COMPLETELY REVERSED. but WORSE.

dean knows benny! dean trusts benny with his life! (as well he should after purgatory and falling in love). benny is being framed by that other vamp who’s the one actually killing people and dean believes him.

everything is shades of gray by s8. they know supernatural creatures. they BOTH work with them (ALL THE TIME at this point. i mean, come on?? crowley?? CAS???? see more below). they KNOW supernatural=evil=must die IS NOT TRUE (sam should especially know this after demon blood!!! seriously wtf!!!).

and look, benny is bamf but at this point, cas is at full angel power and about a million times more dangerous. i mean good lord (and y’all know i love cas with my whole entire being and soul), he literally just smote unknown numbers of angels and whole mess of humans when he was “god” like. a year ago. but sam trusts him anyway! he’s so glad to have cas back, even though he’s acting weird(er than usual).

but benny?? absolutely not. vamp=evil=must die. (also this happens wayyyy too soon after sam kills dean’s daughter for me. which i’m pretty sure happens as a retaliation because dean killed that girl that ate the brains that sam knew when he was younger, but still. this is the Bad Codependency ShitTM i was talking about yesterday. the brothers can only have each other or friends that they kinda co-parent, e.g., charlie and kevin)

i simply don’t understand. now, it’s been a hot minute since i’ve seen citizen fang, and i get very intense about my benny, but i’m upset!!!!!! about these two episodes in particular!!!!!!

dean is obviously in the wrong in 2x03 (i’m still in the middle of it, but as i recall, he does figure this out and try to rectify it) and sam is obviously in the wrong in 8x09 (and again, it’s been a long ass time, but he does eventually chill out about benny). but i’m just??? ??????   ????????????? why did they do this exact premise again but reversed and also one million times worse because benny. did they?? forget???

look, idk exactly what i’m trying to say with this mess.

probably: something something i love benny something something, something something sam hating benny is so ooc i don’t understand why they did that something something.

hold please, i’m about to go on a very long rant about benny