#no i wasn't a nun but yes i was abandonded by family and hurt by those i trusted

[pawacelsus]

ALL MY VESTAL LOVING RAMBLES UNDER THE READ MORE--

So. Junia. The Vestal. The dedicated healer, the “noob trap,” the nun terrified of her own thoughts.

not of murder or something like that, oh no. Alas, she was simply horny.

Honestly, while this blog is very clearly PD themed, I gotta say that Junia holds a special place in my heart. Perhaps my favorite character in the entire game. She’s simply interesting.

Something I like to note is comparing her lines to Reynauld. Both devout followers of the faith, there are some interesting differences: Junia talks more about her own suffering, whereas Reynauld does not.

A few examples of this can be seen in her masochistic lines, shown below:

“ You shall suffer as I have! “ “ The Mother Superior would be right to impose ten lashings instead...  “ “ In my life, suffering has been a potent motivator...  “ “  Why does everyone hate me? Even the mother superior...  “

I could quite easily pick 100 lines that show this clearly, but these few feel like they get the point across. She also seems to compare her life as a nun to slavery, which is another thing to mention.

She quite clearly hates her old life, and she was most likely forced into it. There aren’t many lines that seem to show this, but the there are several I find the most clear, when she is irrational:

“ Mother - Father! Too late! The convent has taken me... “ “ Mother! MOTHER! “

A scared little girl, begging for her parents.

Most of the others at least had some choice. Audrey didn’t need to continue to rob graves after her debts were supposedly paid. Reynauld did not need to stay away from his family. But Junia... There was no choice for her. It was decided for her, at a supposedly young age.

And we can tell her time was not exactly the nicest. Again, looking to irrational, we find many examples of how she truly feels:

“ Please! Be kind to me, Sisters! “ “ It was a beautiful hymn, sung by the pigs of St. Martha's. “ (Note: this line seems a bit more ambiguous, but seeing as she refers to the others of the order as “pigs,” I say it counts) “ That Sister Abigail... always a cheat. “ “ Hah! Even the pigs of St. Martha's can carry that tune! “

She clearly does not hold those memories fondly. When irrational, like most other heroes, between her mumbling and whispering, there are very clear things. 

And compared to the other heroes, Junia cries and screams a considerable amount. She is mentioned as crying three times, but she screams around 4. This does not seem like a lot, but I could not find many other mentions of heroes crying or screaming (screaming being a line that ended in an exclamation point and included either all capitals, or words that would be best emphasized as screaming. In general, she’s quite loud, so it’s all up to interpretation!)

But there are a few lines of Junia’s that stick out far more than the others, at least to me.

“ But I am only a child. How can you ask that of me... How.. “ “ I am no hero! Just a little girl in a woman's garb! “ “ I will not fear martyrdom. I will not! “

Whether she is young or not does not matter. Junia sees herself as a young woman, a child. I assume she is no older than thirty, with twenty-five seeming the logical higher end of her age. And if she is but a child, then her line of not fearing martyrdom feels even more off. What is is it they asked of her when she was only a child? Were the duties too much? Was it lashes with a switch? Or was it something darker, something far more awful?

Junia is... afraid. When I compare her to another one of my favorite heroes, the plague doctor, I find many, many differences. When Paracelsus is afraid, she attempts to remain logical. She does not cry, she does not scream, she falls silent and tries to find the best solution. Junia, on the other hand, simply begs for mercy.

Another note I wish to make, is during the final boss. Spoiler warning here, for any who is still unaware but wishes to remain spoiler free. 

While Reynauld, a warrior for the Light, does not fear the Heart of Darkness, Junia does. While this may simply be Reynauld being so hardened by his time in the crusades that he can steel himself against the terror, Junia cannot. And yet, they are both described as warriors. Junia cannot handle the sight, while Reynauld can.

I shall end this one for now with a final list of my own beliefs.

- Junia is young. If she has to be an adult, then she is no older than twenty-five. She is young, and it shows. - Junia had experienced some sort of traumatic experience while a member of the Covenant, perhaps multiple. It was something no child should ever experience, especially against (assuming) their will. - (I have to thank @goddammit-bio​ for this one, as it was a potential idea I completely missed despite dealing with an anxiety disorder myself) Junia may suffer from an anxiety disorder, dealing with it by journaling and fidgeting 

In the end, however, I want to say that one of the most wonderful parts of darkest dungeon is the fact that any and all heroes are unique in story. The goal Red Hook went for was to have you, the player, write a story for your own heroes. This is how I interpreted Junia, shaped by my own experiences and understanding of traumatic childhood experiences. If that’s not how you see her, then by all means, that’s perfectly fine! This is simply the way she comes off for me, after looking at her dialogue for quite some time. Every way of looking at her is valid, and technically correct. Unless Red Hook comes out to say “this is how she is supposed to be interpreted,” then there is no right or wrong way.