#no but seriously i'm like entering the stage where we go “wait my family was abusive to me and mistreated me as a child?”

[ottogatto]

CPTSD Workbook + The Loving Parent Guidebook -- let's go treat all that shit mfs

[misguidedasgardian]

The Winter Sun (24)

24. SnowStorm

MASTERLIST

Summary: An unknown ray of hope

Pairing: Cregan Stark x Fem!Targaryen Reader 

Warnings: Cursing, medieval and asoiaf customs, AGE GAP, Cregan is 12 years OLDER than reader), arranged marriage, war, and all that comes with it, implied forced imprisonment, and implied non-con, pregnancy, angst, might miss some warnings

+18, MINORS DNI

Wordcount: 3 k

Notes: I don't know what is gotten inside of me, I'm inspired hehehe, remember that the timing on this has been paced by x3 haha

Nobody talked to you, nobody told you anything, but you could tell something was wrong, very, very wrong.

People seemed nervous and skittish, Aemond was gone for most part of the day, and night, he left you alone, and you took the opportunity to relax in your bed

You were grieving, but it was so hard, you had no process, no nothing, Cregan was far away, and suddenly he was dead, but you couldn’t process it, you couldn’t even think about it

A single tear fell down your eye as you touched your belly

Was it Cregan’s? or was it Aemond’s?

You couldn’t possibly know

Yes you had bled, but the maester said it was common having a little spotting in early stages of pregnancy… but still… you were showing up quite early if you were to believe it was Aemond’s 

But you couldn’t help but wonder…

You guessed you had to wait until it was born.

You hoped it was a girl but… if it was Cregan’s you doubted Aemond was going to let you keep it, you could only pray that he would take the time to take it to Winterfell where she or he could be safe… but if it was his…

You cried louder

Once you stopped crying and were laying on your bed, Aemond entered the room

“I have news”, he said, his voice sounded strangled, you sat on the bed and looked at him wide-eyed

“What?”, you asked

“I will take you out of here”, he said, like it was good news, perhaps they were

“Are we going to King’s Landing?”, you asked, your voice plain

“No, I’m taking you to your home in the Vale”, that really surprised you

“What?”, you asked, not believing him

“I’m already making the arrangements”, he said, he was serious, but not like always, he did not have that superiority demeanor that always accompanied him

“And King’s Landing?”

“No”, he answered sharply, he wouldn’t tell you anything, a war had broken outside these walls and you didn’t even know what was happening, but one thing soothed you… If Aemond was here, he was not in the field, possibly killing members of your family.

The love of your life and father to your babies might be dead, but at least, at least, with your personal sacrifice, you could help your family in gathering and preparing, distracting the man with the biggest dragon in the world

it was a consolation

But not knowing what was going on outside those wretched walls did make you feel uneasy, the fact that Aemond was here the entire time made you believe that rather things were going terribly well with the Greens, or he was out of it completely

Aemond after looking deep into your face, prepared to leave

“What happened?”, you asked him, and then he looked at you, his eye then fell to your belly

“You are with my child, this is a terrible and dark place, you need to be in a more nicer place, if we want the child and you to thrive”, he said so seriously, like he was talking about a political arrangement 

You wanted to remind him that it was Cregan’s baby, but you stopped yourself, one because you didn’t want him to… “get rid of it” as he threatened you he would do, and two, you weren’t even sure.

“When?”, you asked

“Tomorrow”, he said shortly, and then he abandoned your room.

You were almost blinded when you took a step outside, having seen the sunlight directly in months. You almost had forgotten what the clear, pure air smelt like, being trapped in that hellish room. Some days you thought you had lost your mind.

But here you were

You should be happy that you are going back to your own home, some place you had the advantage in, but then… the advantage for what exactly?

Trying to kill him again?

That would backfire terribly

Trying to escape?

And where would you go? back to Winterfell? your loved ones would pay the price of your actions, you knew it.

And if it was Aemond’s baby?

You whimpered when you realized… there was no way out of this, of him…

Vhagar roared in front of you both to prove it, in a greeting, and she made you tremble. Aemond grabbed your hand and led you towards her, your own dragon wasn’t even in sight, Aemond helped you up the ropes first and then he followed you closely.

Under normal circumstances you would be on the other side of the castle away from this wretched beast, but you didn’t want to fight, you didn’t want to upset him. 

You accommodate yourself in the saddle, and Aemond arranged the leather straps around your thighs carefully and then he chained himself to the saddle, you felt him at your back his hand surrounded you to take the reins 

You didn’t miss his fingers ghosting over your belly.

Vhagar was heavy and slow and yet, she took flight easily. Soon you were in the skies, the last time you had done so, was when you surrender yourself to Aemond

You leaned back, your body fully pressed against Aemond, trying to push up your own body was making you have a cramp, and you didn’t have the strength to endure one, not right now.

Aemond smiled, he took to the skies, with you in his arms, your body leaning completely on his, his baby in your belly, he felt like the King of the world, and how could he not?

“When I’m in the skies… it feels that this is where I belong”, he whispered in your ear, “specially with you in my arms”

And the funny thing is, you also felt the same when you were in the skies.

“This is why they say Targaryen are closest to gods than to men”, you said back, wanting to avoid the subject

The flight was longer than you had expected, Vhagar being slow. Or perhaps it was the company that made it dreadfully tiring

You were glad the wind made it difficult to sustain a conversation.

You wondered how Aemond knew exactly where your home was, but you tried not to dwell on it too much, for your own peace of mind.

Vhagar landed heavily on the ground, right in front of it. It was just like you remembered, from four years ago when you escaped the Red Keep when… When Aemond tried to pressure you into giving him your maidenhead

People started coming out of the castle, to your surprise, they didn’t even seem surprised to see Vhagar there, they had been expecting you… although… The people, your own people, seemed scared to see you, you remembered some of them, specially from when you escaped the Red Keep and spend here a couple of months, but they even dare to look at you

Perhaps this what Aemond had meant when he said “he had already made the arrangements”, meaning terrorize the servants of the castle out of their loyalty to you

The Vale was loyal to Rhaenyra, he surely needed to make sure nobody was going to open their mouths about you being here.

“It is quite beautiful”, Aemond said, placing his hands on your hips, encouraging you to enter your childhood home, where your father had raised you with his kindness and his love. You were sad it had to be tainted by Aemond, and what he was going to keep doing to you

You entered your home slowly, drinking everything in, you had missed it, it had huge windows and wide, colorful, sunlit rooms. It wasn’t as big as the seven great castles, but… it was a castle nonetheless 

He walked the halls as he knew them, perhaps he had been here in your absence, and that made you even more scared, about how deranged Aemond was

You wanted to go towards your room, but Aemond continued down the corridor towards what it was your father’s old room

“Aemond”, you called, “that is…”

“The master bedroom of this castle I took”, he said, opening the double doors, signaling for you to enter behind him.

You weren’t fazed to enter the room, your father’s things had been taken away years ago, and.. you don't quite remember it from your childhood when he was alive.

The room had huge windows, a balcony, a huge bed freshly made, you could tell, a table with chairs in one corner, and nightstands on each side of the huge bed with a wood canopy. 

“I could get accustomed to this”, Aemond said, you didn’t look at his face, but you could picture perfectly his smug face, “you, and me, reigning our small castle, with an army of silver haired children”, you sighed, already tired of his fantasy, you walked towards the windows and looked over at the sea and the risks of the Vale. You placed your hand on the window, longing for freedom, even though you wouldn’t know what to do with it.

Cregan was gone.

You felt the bed move behind you, and you turned around to see Aemond sitting on the edge of the bed. He taped the mattress by his side

“I want to feel you”, he moaned, and you only walked towards him, surrendering yourself to him, so broken to even fight him on this

What you didn’t know is that the greatest army the North has ever seen, had been gathering, marching from every corner to the coldest realm, already recuperated from the Winter, and ready to eliminate any threat to the reign of Rhaenyra Targaryen.

The Northerner Army met in Caitlin’s Vale, all around the castle of the same name.

Nobody knew who was going to lead said army. They had been called by Lord Roderik, to avenge their Lord, and they had all answered to the call.

For avenging Lord Cregan Stark. 

Cregan 

The huge camp was a sight to behold, each house of the North, the great one and the smaller ones, all of them had come.

And as their leaders met in the middle, to discuss strategy and where they were going to meet the Knights of the Vale, the remains of the Winter Wolves marched into the camp, leading them, as a hooded figure.

Every soldier made way for the huge stallion that led the main leaders of the small army, as they bowed their heads, they didn’t know who it was, but the bare figure demanded respect 

The leaders of the Great army both payed attention to the group approaching, and it was only when they were in front of them, that Cregan removed his hood, revealing himself to the camp amongst gasps and cheers

“CREGAN CREGAN CREGAN!”, they started chanting for their Lord 

“They embushed us!”, he shouted, “they burnt us! and yet… we are here!”, he said, to everyone’s cheers, “Aemond Targaryen, the Kinslayer, has taken my wife, the Lady of Winterfell, his brother the usurper, has taken our Queen’s throne!”, he said and he heard them booing, “For our burnt fathers and brothers, for your lady of winterfell, for the justice for the traitors, WE MARCH!”

With those words the army was fired up to march south, to kill every Green that stands in their way, to recuperate you

Cregan joined the leaders in the main tent.

“This time, we will not be alone”, he said firmly, “Daemon Targaryen and his dragon will meet us in the Crossroads Inn, he said, pointing to a map, but we, before that, we will join the Knights of the Vale, right about there as well”

“And the Rogue Prince will take care of the dragon?”, asked Lord Cerwyn

“That is what is expected, yes”, said Cregan.

“Is the Lady (Y/N) going to be in Harrenhal?”, asked another

“Our job is to take the castle, the real battle will be after we take Harrenhal and march souther still

“This is the greatest army the Seven Kingdoms has ever seen!”, said Lord Roderik, “it is impossible that we are going to march undetected through the Riverlands”

“In that case, the Baratheons and the Royal army of traitors will be there to meet us”, said Cregan, “and that will work to our advantage, it will save us a trip, we end half of the Green forces in one attack, they will have no chance against us”

The determination of their lord inspired all the men, this time, they will not fail

And so they started the slow march, as their number tripled the one of the last time, the pace was three times slower. 

Cregan wanted them to know, he wanted all his enemies in one place, to kill them all at once. You were the only thing on his mind. 

This was going to take him months, much to his dismay, but he knew his Queen held the Capital, he knew his son and his home was safe, and he knew you were alive, that monster might take you, but he wouldn’t harm you or he would have learnt about it by now.

You were waiting for him, he knew it

It was all that kept him sane, the thought of you, waiting for him. 

It was in moments like this he wished he could fly, just like you, he wished to be strong just like you, his beautiful wife, mother of his child.

He wondered if you thought he was dead, he really didn’t hope so, although he knew the Kinslayer would have told you. He wondered if you were pregnant with his baby, he was sure you were when he left you in Winterfell, he had learnt to know you and your beautiful body.

He sighed as he saw his army march from over a hill

The only thing he wanted to do was to have you by his side, cuddling you, and his son on his chest, your pregnant belly pressed against him. 

Soon, he thought 

Aemond looked at you, you yourself were looking at the window, touching your big belly, he could not tell if what he felt in his chest was something good or something bad, it was a crippling feeling, a burn so intense he believed it could burn him whole. 

He had to leave you for a few weeks, having to go to the battlefield, but his return was swiftly. His brother, the King, was missing, his mother was captured, his grandfather executed, and his other brother…

They said he died on his successful campaign as his burning tent fell on top of him, others say he was murdered in his nightshirt by a myrnise. 

Anyways, they were losing this war

The only front that was winning was the seafront on the East, and the Lannister Army on the West, this was not lost yet, but his sister, was also a prisoner of Rhaenyra, he was scared of what they might do to her after the murder of his nephew, 

And rumors had reached them that a huge Northerner army was marching from the North, he was longing to face them on the battlefield, to burn that wretched country once and for all. 

He did not feared them, for they had no one to lead them, the last remaining Stark couldn’t even talk, it was a baby in a crib 

Which led him back to…

“When I fantasized about being with you, I have never picture this”, he said bitterly, you turned to look at him, seriousness in your eyes

“You didn’t expect to kill my husband?, threatened my infant son? rape me? go figure”, you asked, you had become more bold as your pregnancy progressed, Aemond said it was because of the dragon inside of you, he had never been rough with you, he has been rather patient.

“I said you were mine and I was going to do anything to prove it”, of course it was your fault, perhaps if you had accepted the marriage with him in the first place, nothing would have ever happened, maybe Cregan would still be alive, “but there is no point on dwelling of what might have been”, he said, his voice plain.

It was hard to know what was going on inside his head, really

“I want to know what is happening”, you said firmly, looking back at him

“What do you mean?”, he asked

“What is going on with the war that broke out when you killed Lucerys?”, you asked firmly, he chuckled darkly

“What would you know about the intricacies of war?”, he mocked

“Is my family dead?”, you asked firmly

“If it was, do you think we would be hiding here?”, he asked

“Perhaps they all are, your brother regions on his usurped throne”, you bit back. He looked at you, analyzing your face, really wondering if he should tell you about what was going on

Perhaps if you knew Rhaenyra sat the Iron Throne, you would be persuaded to try to get away from him, perhaps you would try to escape him, knowing the blacks were winning

“i don’t know where your cunt of a cousin is, but my brother sits the Iron Throne”, he said bitterly, and you lost your attention off of him and back to look outside the window

He didn’t know if you did that because you didn’t believe him, or rather, if you did and you believed everything was lost, that you were irrevocably his

“I arranged for a short ceremony”, he said then, you turned to face him once more, frowning

“A short ceremony for what?”, you asked, angrily

“We are to be wed”, he said

“No”, you whined

“Yes”, he said firmly, your eyes filled with tears

“NO!”, you screamed, “why?”, you cried, accusing him

“You are a widow, and you are carrying my child, there is no discussion”, and his heart broke when he saw the utter despair and hate in your eyes who looked so much like his own. 

more notes: is the baby Cregan's? Or Aemond's? what do you think?

taglist:

@severewobblerlightdragon @missusnora @stargaryenx @poppyreader @chainsawsangel @court-jester-stuff @batprincess1013 @eddiepicker 

@lyannesworld @arujee @kamisunshine @​​mss-nthng @partypoison00 @grimistangel @elleclairez @may-machin @prettykinkysoul @justagurlwithships @champomiel 

@laura-naruto-fan1998 @zoleea-exultant @devotedlythoughtfulanchor @zoleea-exultant @llleon666 @dark-night-sky-99 @bitchigoteverythingissues @harrypotteranna23-blog

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[its-leethee]

Some context for starters: This is my first time watching Steven Universe.

Just like with Lego Monkie Kid (another excellent show I highly recommend), I'm watching the episodes ahead of my kids and then re-watching it with them. We just finished our watch of season 2.

I've been on the internet long enough to have heard a lot about Steven Universe, so I know vaguely how it ends, and specifically why it ended.

And ugh. Goodness. This show is outstanding. Why do people hate on it? (Yeah. Yeah. I know why.... But seriously. Why.)

Anyways. I just had to take a minute and gush a bit about 2x06 "The Test." I adore how it shows us Steven's growing maturity and strength and reveals about the gem's vulnerability and love for him.

The episode opens with the gems playing a board game with Steven. To the surprise and disappointment of none of the gems, Steven wins. Hm.... put a pin in that for later.

When Steven goes looking for their next activity, he discovers the sea shrine statuette. This memento of his first disastrous mission prompts him to express remorse that his forgetfulness compromised that mission. In their rush to reassure Steven, the gems let slip that his failure didn't even matter: the mission was staged as a test for him. Steven is still devasted that he let them down, and he pleads for a final chance to prove himself.

The gems reluctantly agree to give him another test. They make a big show of fussing over Steven and warning him about how difficult and dangerous this test is going to be.

Steven confidently enters the gauntlet they've prepared, but before he makes it through to the end, he discovers that the gems rigged this test, too. (remember the board game earlier? Bet that they let him win) Steven's angry, indignant, and hurt. Didn't they believe in him? Didn't they respect his abilities at all?

i just love how many emotions we're shown in this short stretch

But he overhears the gems' anguished conversation:

"We have to give him another success. He can't lose his confidence like that again," worries Pearl.

"We're bad at this," admits Amethyst.

"We don't know what he needs," mourns Garnet.

The gems have such high expectations for Steven, but they're not as afraid of Steven failing as they are of themselves failing him.

Steven's expression changes; he makes a decision, and walks straight through the gauntlet.

that face. that's determination

Steven resolutely marches up to the waiting gems, hands fisted, head down, and falls to his hands and knees in front of them. "I can't believe you guys. That was so--" and here is the moment where his demeanor completely changes, "--insane!"

Steven makes a big show of fussing over them and showering them with gratitude and affirmations. He gives them their confidence back. "This was just what I needed," he says.

Steven has realized that the adults he looks up to and relies on... are just as insecure and fallible as he is.

It's an important step forward on his journey to adulthood.

We're so proud of you too, Steven. You da man.

aw i love this family hug so much

[sorryimananti-romantic]

Mist | Choi San | Chapter 2

Pairing: Choi San x OC (Seohyun)

Genre: supernatural (ghost), romance, high school

Trigger Warnings: paranormal, death mentions, violence

Words: 7.2k

Disclaimer: I do not own anything except my original character and the story. I do not own any gifs or pictures used.

Full story on Wattpad (don’t spoil here if you read there too)

chapter directory

-----------

A few paranormally uneventful days passed. Seohyun hadn't exactly opened up to the group of boys that she was now able to call friends, but she was slowly getting there. It was hard not to smile when one of them cracked a silly joke, and harder not to laugh when they had a battle of wits.

She was slowly getting used to her new school. She was past the stage of being a new kid and the students in her class had stopped giving her those looks. She was unnoticed, and she loved it.

Today, like every other morning, Seohyun got ready for school, tying her hair in a half ponytail, peeking out of the window to check if she should wear her glasses or cap today. She had to hide her eyes somehow, they always betrayed her. She didn't want anyone to think she liked to stare into the space. But then she shrugged and tossed her glasses in the bag, wearing her cap as she went to the kitchen.

Her mother was a very busy woman and she liked to spend almost all her day in her office. She was rarely home even if she had a day off anyway. So Seohyun just made herself some coffee, munching on some cookies as she waited for the coffee to become cool enough to drink.

"I still don't get why you let the housemaid go," Jiwoo popped out of nowhere and twirled around the kitchen.

"Well, I didn't entirely let her 'go'. She still comes by on the weekends, you already know that."

"But still! What's wrong with having food everyday?" Jiwoo pushed her dark red hair back as she tsk-ed at Seohyun.

"For one, I wanted to learn to cook, and the food she made was always too much for just me. I always had to throw it out or give it to someone before it went bad. Mom's never home to eat anyway."

"I actually hate your mom, no offence," Jiwoo looked at her and Seohyun shook her head, "I mean, what kind of a mother is she?"

"A woman married to her work with an abnormal child, I kind of understand why she's like this," Seohyun muttered.

"Nah, you're not abnormal. You're gifted. And you don't appreciate it enough."

"No offence, unnie, but ghosts are the company I'd rather not have," Seohyun rinsed her cup and placed it on the rack, taking her school bag and locking the door.

"What's wrong with me?" Jiwoo asked.

"You're one of the better ones, but only because you had temporary amnesia before you died and you still don't know who exactly you are and why you're a ghost!" Seohyun snorted at the weirdness of all this.

"You think I'd ever be able to recall? Or just be stuck with you forever?" Jiwoo asked.

"I'd rather you try to move around and find out who you are instead of making me look like I talk to myself."

"Ah, you pain me, child. It's all because you have new friends now and don't care about me anymore. Right, catto?"

The black cat, which Seohyun hadn't noticed earlier, meowed in response.

"And, here comes the pretty one," Jiwoo grinned and Seohyun looked in her direction to find San coming their way.

"Pretty one? Seriously?" Seohyun shook her head.

"I mean, they're all pretty, but I like this kid more-"

"Hey," San gave her a smile as he meowed to the cat, who gladly jumped in San's arm when he put them forward.

"This little-" Seohyun stopped, and San laughed. "She never comes when I ask!"

"She likes me more, it seems," San rubbed her forehead and she purred, and they walked in comfortable silence to school the rest of the way.

They almost reached the gates of the school but something Seohyun saw from the corner of her eye made her stop in her tracks.

It was a ghost, yet it was something else. It wasn't someone who had died recently for sure. The man, the ghost if you could call it that, was bitter.

"You okay?" San asked, looking in the direction Seohyun was looking in. To him, it seemed she was looking at a wall.

"Yeah, I-I'm okay. Why don't you go ahead? I'll be right back. I should take her too," Seohyun picked the cat from San's hand, "We don't want her roaming around the school and getting scared, do we now?"

San raised a suspicious brow at her, but nodded as he reluctantly went in.

The man tried approaching Seohyun first, but she motioned him to follow her and went to the backside of the school, where surely there would be very few people walking by at this time.

"State your business," Seohyun said, and the man actually looked taken aback, if his eyes could display some emotion.

Truth be told, Seohyun was always scared dealing with men ghosts and older ghosts in general. Since ghosts could touch her, they were as much of a threat to her as humans. And these old ghosts, the ones with skin that looked grey, almost as if the ghost had started decomposing too, were usually not in their right mind.

"I have waited decades to find the mediator," the man's eyes gleamed rather wickedly.

"Mediator?" Seohyun asked. A rather fancy term for someone who could see the dead. "And why did you have to wait decades?"

"Let's say the mediator supposed to sort my death out met with rather... unfortunate circumstances," the man cleared his throat but his voice was still hoarse as he said, "You have to come with me."

"Well, if you waited decades, can you wait a few more hours? I have school, and please do NOT disturb me during my class," Seohyun made sure her tone was polite as she said this, but the man grunted. Before he could try anything, she muttered an awkward bye and walked swiftly to the gates, letting the cat go. She didn't realize she'd been holding the cat for comfort.

San, who had just witnessed Seohyun talking to thin air from the other side of the road, sighed loudly as he walked slowly to the gates.

San hadn't meant to follow her, but he turned around after a few steps of walking to the building, hoping to offer to come along with her, but when he saw her stop in the middle of the road and look as if she was actually talking to someone, he paused. He knew he shouldn't, but he watched her. And he did not know what to make of it.

Was Seohyun crazy? Didn't look like it. If she was, she did a damn good job at hiding it. When San finally reached class, he saw Seohyun chatting with Jongho. Perfectly normal. Or was she?

San said nothing as he sat in his spot, but he felt her tap his shoulder. He turned around and she asked, "I thought you went to class, where were you roaming around?"

San stared at her light brown orbs, coming out of the trance when she blinked. "I just wanted to walk around a bit."

He saw her frown but then she nodded and went back to chatting with Jongho. San turned back in his seat, and throughout the classes, he kept wondering if that was the reason why she covered her face or eyes.

When school ended, Seohyun said she had to go somewhere and said bye. San made an excuse too and started to follow her. He was going to see for himself, what she was gonna do.

San knew it was impolite to do this. And he knew if she found out, she'd really be angry with him, maybe never talk to him again. This was supposed to be her secret for sure. She would probably never tell any one of them. He wasn't even sure what it was.

Seohyun led him to an abandoned warehouse, and he heard her say, "Why bring me here?"

She paused for a few second, looking around as if for help, and San ducked quickly behind the boxes before she could see her. He couldn't hear her now, but he did get bits about how it was creepy of 'him' to bring her to this place without warning her, and he didn't miss how she kept looking behind her, as if she was waiting for someone to appear or just didn't want to keep doing this.

Who was this 'him'? Her imaginary friend? A ghost? San shook his head, and got on his feet when he noticed her go inside the warehouse.

San crept up behind them, and couldn't believe what he saw.

The locked door somehow unlocked, somehow the chains fell and the door magically opened wide in front of her, without Seohyun having even moved a finger.

What was happening?

Seohyun was asked to come in the warehouse and she couldn't ignore the roaring of her gut that told her something was going to go really, really wrong. She had such a strong feeling some years ago too, and she had barely gotten away from her life then.

All her nerves screamed at her to run, anywhere, just not go in. Where was Jiwoo when she needed her? Seohyun was kind of furious how she was never there for her.

Seohyun watched the old man walk in, looking around, and before she entered, she turned her head once hoping she would see Jiwoo-

Instead, she felt her heart sink as she saw none other than San, attempting to hide as their eyes met.

"Come in now, don't keep me waiting," the man grumbled, and Seohyun shouted an okay to him before she looked at San, hoping to warn him with her eyes as she put a finger to her mouth, telling him not to make a sound and motioning him to stay where he was.

Seohyun went inside, her heart slamming against her chest. This wasn't supposed to happen. San must think she's crazy or worse. Her mind made a mental list of how many ways this could go wrong.

"I used to think mediators ran in the family. But the one who was supposed to help me, he did not have any offspring. I spent so many years in ignorance, not knowing that it was completely random. Just like god picking up a needle in the haystack."

"Cut to the chase. What do you want with me and why bring me here?"

"I have forgotten why I died. And I want to move on. But I can't because I don't remember why I am still here. Someone told me there were various other ways to move on... Let's say I had to try."

As soon as Seohyun saw the growing smirk on the man, she knew it was time to run the hell away. But several bottles came flying at her, and she barely dodged them as they crashed on the wall next to her.

"You don't have to do this! It's wrong! I help dead people move on, there must be a way other than stupid violence-"

But the man waved another hand and now the boxes came flying at her. She was grabbed by the arm and pulled against someone, and she sighed in both relief and horror as she saw it was San.

"Are you stupid! You'll get hurt!" She yelled at him. He just took her hand and ran towards the shelves, hoping to hide from whatever it was that sent flying objects in the air. He almost dragged her until he was sure he was quite away from whatever it was.

"What the hell is happening?" San asked through his teeth.

"Why did you even follow me? Are you stupid?"

"Who is it?" San's grip on her wrist tightened as his eyes searched around.

"It's a ghost, San. Do you believe me?" Seohyun asked, waiting for a snide remark.

"From what I've seen? Sure," San muttered, and Seohyun wasn't sure if he was being sarcastic.

"He's near. Let's move," Seohyun said, and this time, she grabbed San's hand as she led him through the various shelves that lined the warehouse, glad they weren't empty.

A blast shocked them, making them jump in the air as they realized the shelves were collapsing one by one.

"Shit, shit, shit!" Seohyun ran, San matching her pace and she ran her eyes around, finally finding a place to hide. It was a narrow passage between huge containers. Seohyun looked at her options. The man was blocking the entrance so now they could just hide and pray for help or... die. If that's the worst that was to come.

Seohyun dragged San with her to the narrow passage, both of them barely fitting in the small dark place. Now they were side to side but San's body was still half out, so Seohyun pulled him closer, until he was almost in front of him. Since the passage was so narrow and short, there wasn't much gap between them.

San was a bundle of nerves and all, his heart beating wildly. "What's going on-"

"Shh," Seohyun whispered, putting a hand on his mouth to shut him up, "I'll explain everything later, I promise."

San nodded, taking off her hand from his mouth but not leaving it. Seohyun was too busy concentrating on where the man was to notice it. He saw her wince, and she looked at San with apologetic eyes.

"If something happens to us, I'm sorry, San. I'll do my best to save you. The man-the ghost is after me. I don't know why," Seohyun sighed, and San squeezed her hand assuringly.

"I'm with you. Nothing will happen," he whispered, thinking he must sound stupid to say that. But it must have given her some sort of assurance. She put her head on San's chest, sighing again.

The two of them heard the sounds of things getting destroyed alright, Seohyun hearing the man as well, and Seohyun almost cried in relief as she heard Jiwoo whisper her name.

"I can teleport you, but what about him-"

"Either we both go, or we both stay," Seohyun said firmly. She wasn't going to leave him alone.

"Go where?" San asked. Seohyun told him her friend was here and she could help.

Jiwoo looked at Seohyun and a slow grin appeared on her face. "There is something I could try..."

"What?" Seohyun narrowed her eyes at Jiwoo.

"What if I teleport you, but you're still holding San? Would he come with us?"

"I don't know, unnie..." Seohyun trailed, but an idea stuck to her. "It's the same as when I have something with me right? A bag, a cap, something. But that's objects. What about actual humans?"

"Remember when we accidentally teleported our cat once? It was holding on to you and you had forgotten. What if this works?"

Seohyun bit her lip. It was worth a try. "If it doesn't work, promise me we'll come back to San right then."

"But your body can't handle too many teleportations-"

"Promise me," Seohyun insisted, and Jiwoo rolled her eyes as she nodded. "Hurry up, he's closer."

"San, listen to me carefully," Seohyun said. "You know what teleportation is, right?"

San wanted to ask her if now was really the time, but he said yes- from the movies, and she continued, "I'm gonna attempt to teleport you along with me. My friend is gonna do that. You have to trust me."

"No way," San muttered, sighing deeply.

"Yes, you were stupid and brave enough to follow me, so yes, we are teleporting. I've done it before, but I've never teleported someone... normal with me, so this might not work. So if I disappear, and you're here all alone, I promise you, San, that I'll be back within a minute, okay?"

"How am I supposed to make sense of all you're saying?" San's eyes were helpless.

"Just... trust me. I won't leave you alone. I promise. Now, I have to, er, hold you, so she can teleport us. Gotta make sure I take you with me..."

Seohyun heard Jiwoo snicker, and she passed her a death glare. San, tempted to roll his eyes, held her hands.

"I'm afraid I'll have to hold you tighter. You see, when we teleport, we tend to lose what we're not holding tightly..."

"Oh..." San left her hands, and Seohyun muttered 'here goes nothing' as she wrapped her arms around San's waist, surprised that it was so small.

"Hold me tightly, and no matter what, do not let me go, you understand?"

"Yes ma'am," San said as he bent down to place his chin on her shoulder and bring her closer. "This okay?"

"Yes," Seohyun realized she was holding her breath, so she said, "Take a deep breath, San."

San did so, and Jiwoo smirked a little, watching two scared children hug each other. She came forward, holding Seohyun only, and did her magic.

San felt his stomach twist and turn, saw a million colourful stars, almost got nauseous but his only comfort was Seohyun so he held her tighter and shut his eyes. He didn't open them again until he landed on hard ground, his back aching with the impact.

He opened his eyes and saw... nothing.

He wasn't sure if he was blind or not, but he looked down and saw Seohyun half on top of him, attempting to get up, and he realized he had his vision all right.

"Where the hell," Seohyun got up, "are we?"

"I guess your body could only attempt a half trip," Jiwoo said, and San instantly turned at the voice, making eye contact with the red haired girl.

"That's the ghost friend that teleported us?" San asked Seohyun.

"You can see her!?" Seohyun asked, and San looked at Jiwoo.

"I wasn't supposed to see her, was I?" He raised his brow, and Seohyun looked at Jiwoo.

"Hey, kid, nice to officially meet you," Jiwoo said, holding out a hand to him so he could stand up. San tried to take it, but his hand passed through Jiwoo's hand, and he gasped.

"I guess you can only see then," Seohyun bit her lip as she looked around. "Is this where ghosts come when they... move on?"

"That's where I come when I'm not on planet Earth," Jiwoo said, "It's like another plane, you could say, another dimension overlapping ours, except this one is for ghosts."

"What now? Should we try again?" Seohyun asked, coughing a bit.

"You should take a breather first. Your body can't handle it," Jiwoo nodded at her and Seohyun sat down on the ground, putting her head over her knees as she brought them closer, shivering a little. Jiwoo was right, something was happening to her. Like a cold coming to her.

"Is she okay?" San asked Jiwoo, and she shrugged. San ran his fingers through his hair as he looked around, finding no source of light that illuminated the area around them.

So Seohyun wasn't crazy. Somehow, though it made no sense, she could see ghosts, she could touch them. San looked at Jiwoo and opened his mouth to ask something, but then thought against it. Now was not the time.

"I know you have a lot of questions," Jiwoo commented, "Let's try to get out of here first before we have the talk."

"Has she... ever brought someone here?" San asked.

"This is the first time she came here too," Jiwoo said, "Usually when a ghost teleports her, it's quick and efficient. Much like you see in movies or books."

"We should get out of this place quick. I don't want him to come find us here," Seohyun said, getting up.

"Are you sure you're okay? Can you make it back?" Jiwoo asked.

"I have to," Seohyun said.

Jiwoo nodded, and Seohyun looked at San for permission. San came forward and they both held each other tight as Jiwoo attempted to teleport them again.

This time, they landed on soft grass, but the impact with which they did sent them rolling a bit. San's breath was knocked out of him and he coughed loudly, gasping for breath. As soon as he recovered, he looked for Seohyun-

Seohyun was bent rather awkwardly, and it looked like she wasn't moving. San and Jiwoo both rushed to her, straightening her body. Jiwoo checked if she was breathing.

"She is breathing. She must have collapsed from being tired, don't worry, it's happened before too," Jiwoo assured him.

San sighed, looking up at the sky, wondering what he had gotten himself into. He looked around, finding the place familiar.

"Is this... the park near our school?" San asked Jiwoo.

"Yes, I tried to teleport us as close to Seohyun's home as possible, but looks like we could only make it till here."

"What if someone had seen us appear out of thin air?"

Jiwoo laughed. "They'd probably run for their lives. You'd be aliens."

San smiled a little at that. That's exactly what he would have thought if he had seen Seohyun.

"So are you... Seohyun's friend?" San finally asked.

"You could say that. I'm older than her so she always calls me unnie, but I keep telling her to call me Jiwoo."

"Then I'll call you noona," San smiled, making Jiwoo grin.

"She helps ghosts move on. When someone dies and they have unfinished business that they just can't leave behind, they sometimes choose to become ghosts until they get done with that. Seohyun helps them do that."

"That must be hard..." San wondered if it was always as bad as this time.

"It is, but what happened today is not a common occurrence. The man she saw today, he's been dead for a good while and has forgotten his purpose here. I once heard the other ghosts talk about him too. Ghosts like that, you have to avoid them. They're bitter, and usually mean Seohyun harm."

"So now... I can see you, does that mean I'll be able to see other ghosts too?"

"You'll find out soon," Jiwoo said.

Seohyun woke up with a gasp, her eyes wide. Jiwoo helped her sit up, and Seohyun muttered 'water'. San quickly opened Seohyun's bag and fished out her bottle, which she drank hungrily from, some water spilling down her chin as well.

"Slow down, kid," Jiwoo patted her back. Seohyun emptied the whole bottle, wiping her chin, then felt something run down her nose.

"Nosebleed. Do you have tissues?" Jiwoo asked and Seohyun shrugged, looking upwards and holding her nose. Jiwoo searched through her bag but San took out a handkerchief from his pocket and handed it to Seohyun.

"Does this usually happen?" San asked.

"No... it's the first time," Jiwoo admitted. Seohyun nodded too. "When we accidentally teleported the cat with her, she became dehydrated, but that was it."

Seohyun wiped her nose, looking at Jiwoo and she gave her a thumbs up.

"I shouldn't have followed you..." San shook his head, "It's because of me that-"

"You shouldn't have, but I'm kind of glad you did. Jiwoo is unreliable as a ghost friend and who knows what would have happened to me if you were not there? I could have died," Seohyun said nonchalantly.

"HEY!" Jiwoo smacked her arm but Seohyun ignored her.

"But look at you-" San was cut by Seohyun putting her hand up and saying, "I need food, and I mean NOW."

A few minutes later, they were watching Seohyun hungrily gulp down noodles and fried chicken. San had stopped eating midway just to watch her eat with a speed he hadn't ever seen before.

"Are you sure you're even chewing?" He asked, and Seohyun glared at him.

"The food is not going anywhere, Seohyun, slow down," Jiwoo laughed, "seeing you eat like this is making me wish I could eat too."

"Okay, mom," Seohyun said, finally slowing down. They ate the rest of the food silently, then Seohyun decided she'd like some coffee. They decided to walk her home as she sipped on her coffee and answered San's questions.

"Have you ever told anyone?" San asked first.

"Never. My mom only knows because she's, well, my mom and it's weird when a little kid sees stuff nobody else does."

"And what has she done about this?" San wasn't sure if he should have asked this.

Seohyun sighed, "She tried to 'help' me, but then she decided avoiding me was the best way. So now she's married to her work."

"And your dad?"

"He's never been here in the first place."

"Oh..." San faltered, but saw Seohyun shrug. "You can ask me anything, San. You deserve an explanation. Don't hesitate."

"Why can you see ghosts?"

"I don't know that either," Seohyun smiled as she looked at the sky. "Born this way?"

"Would you have ever told us?" San asked. Seohyun stopped walking at that, and faced him.

"To be honest, I've never made friends, San, because of this reason. That someone would find out. They'd never believe me, they'd think I'm crazy. So I don't know if I would have told you guys, ever," Seohyun paused, "But you found out, and you witnessed everything. What do you think?"

San scratched his neck. "I think you're right. I don't think any of us would have believed you. We'd have dismissed it as a joke. But now that I did see everything... It's different now. I hope you understand that."

"You sure you don't want to, I don't know, ever talk to me and all?"

San smiled. "You think I'd abandon my friend just like that?"

Seohyun couldn't help but stare at San, his sharp eyes that grew warmer every time he smiled, how they slightly curved.

"I want you to know that if it was anyone of us, and they had seen what I had seen, they would have never abandoned you. We don't take our friendships lightly."

"That's... good to hear," Seohyun finally smiled. "Do you think they'd believe us if we tell them?"

"They'd need some convincing, but yes, they would. Do you want to tell them?"

"Not yet," Seohyun said, "When the time is right."

San nodded, and squeezed her hand. "If you're ever in danger, you tell me, okay? If you need anyone, or anything, you tell me, got it? You don't have to face this alone anymore."

Seohyun almost cried right there, but she held it back, squeezing his hand back and nodding. They walked a few minutes until she finally reached home.

"Thank you, San. For everything." Seohyun smiled at him, and this time it was a true smile. San was actually taken aback. It felt like she had truly smiled for the first time, unfiltered.

"Anytime," San managed to say, and watched her go in. He took a deep breath, trying to shake off the image of Seohyun smiling, but found himself smiling too.

Meanwhile, Seohyun collapsed as soon as she entered, and she allowed herself to cry, both happy and sad tears, happy that someone finally understood her, and sad that it hadn't happen earlier. Jiwoo sat down with her, silently rubbing her back.

----------------

Seohyun almost slept in the next day, only woken up for school when Jiwoo threw her off the bed for 'sleeping like a sloth'. She couldn't exactly blame her. Seohyun had been so tired that after crying her heart out, she'd only had the energy to change before she collapsed on her bed and slept without moving an inch.

"My whole body hurts like I did some major workout," Seohyun mumbled as she tried running towards school, but gave up. She'd just walk.

"I don't recall you having such after effects after a teleportation," Jiwoo wondered.

"When it's just me, I'm only drained a bit. Like running. But even when I took the cat accidentally, my head hurt a lot. This time it was a whole human."

"Maybe because they aren't meant to be there," Jiwoo shrugged, meowing at the cat who appeared out of nowhere as usual. "Sometimes I think you might have transferred this teleportation thing to your cat too."

"Except 'I' can't teleport. You ghosts can," Seohyun corrected. She'd be lying if she said she hadn't tried teleporting herself home from school. How cool would that have been?

Jiwoo picked the cat and quickly passed it to Seohyun so no one would witness a flying cat. Seohyun draped her over her shoulder so Jiwoo could play with her. As they were walking, they saw San standing in a corner. He waved, then joined them.

"Hi noona," he said, and Jiwoo tried poking San but her hand went through him.

"I guess you can still only see," Jiwoo shook her head, continuing to pet the cat.

"You can touch the cat? And she sees you?" San asked, curiously watching them.

"Ever since we accidentally teleported her, I can touch her. But I'm pretty sure she could see me before too. All cats can, I think."

"Interesting..."

"Were you... waiting for us or something?" Seohyun finally asked.

"I was. I couldn't sleep last night, truth be told. I kept thinking about what happened. In fact, I'm surprised I didn't freak out..."

"I'm more surprised about that," Seohyun admitted.

"Meanwhile Seohyun here slept as soon as she reached home and I had to wake her up for school too," Jiwoo flipped her hair dramatically. Seohyun scoffed at that.

"You must be very tired... Are you okay?" San asked.

Seohyun nodded, and before she could say something they heard someone calling their names. It was Wooyoung and Yeosang. They joined them, Wooyoung putting his arm over San's shoulder as he said, "You're early today. You usually come in last minute."

"I woke up early today," San said casually, his eyes darting towards Seohyun unconsciously. Yeosang noticed that, trying to stop the smile creeping on his mouth as he looked between Seohyun and San. Seohyun gave him a warning glare, one she made sure was strong enough.

As they waited for class to start, Seohyun was resting her head on the desk. She couldn't quite believe the fact that someone now knew who she was, and was not disgusted or freaked out by her. She couldn't stop wondering what the future would be like, what if this group of boys would really get her to warm up to them, and how they would react if they found out.

San turned around in his seat, a frown growing on his face as he noticed how tired she looked. "Are you sure you're okay?"

"Just very, very tired," Seohyun sighed, lifting her head.

"What if the ghost-man comes here?" San asked.

"Oh. I'd totally forgotten about him..." Seohyun bit her lip, "Well, he knows better not to make a scene in front of people, so chances are he won't."

"Chances? That ghost was dangerous!" San hissed, "What if he does come here?"

"Jiwoo must be out on watch. She'd warn me." Seohyun said, and San looked a little relieved at that. "It's not like the ghost can hurt you, so don't worry."

San rolled his eyes. "I'm worried about you, stupid."

"Oh," Seohyun paused. "You don't have to. I'll be fine."

San tsk-ed at her, turning back in his seat. Seohyun stared at the back of his head. Yunho dragged his seat towards Seohyun as he said, "You both are getting along rather well."

"Well," Seohyun slumped back in her seat, "he keeps talking."

Yunho laughed at that, "He's been thinking of names for your cat too."

"I won't approve if I don't like it. He knows that, right?"

"I'll give a good name, don't worry," San turned back in his seat, having overheard the conversation.

"I don't have much expectations from you, to be honest," Seohyun said casually, tucking her hair behind her ear, "I think Jongho there could give a much better name. He looks like he actually uses his brain."

Yunho and San looked at each other and giggled at that. Her observation was true. Jongho was infamously known as the 'only braincell' of the group. Yunho told her that, which actually made her smile.

"See? I know how to spot the smart ones."

"Who do you think is the most dumb one out of us?" San asked, attempting to make puppy eyes so she won't pick him. Seohyun looked at each one of them slowly, then said, "I haven't talked to you all much, but Wooyoung looks like he doesn't really like to use his brain."

The pair of them laughed so loud at that, catching the rest of the boys' attention as Seohyun tried to shut them up. But they were in tears, slapping their thighs as they laughed.

"Can the both of you stop? San you're second dumbest, just so you know."

That just made them laugh harder. The boys slowly came to them, muttering how they wanted to know what was 'so funny that they were howling'.

"She thinks the smartest one of us is Jongho, and the dumbest is Wooyoung," Yunho finally explained.

Wooyoung was laughing at first until he realized and yelled "HEY!" Jongho giggled, looking satisfied.

"Your brain processing is just a bit slow, that's all. No offence," Seohyun muttered.

"I mean, she's not wrong..." Hongjoong made an impressed face.

"Where do I stand?" Mingi asked, "I'm the second smartest right?"

"From below, yes," Seohyun said, making them all laugh. They all insisted that she rank them, and then they'd tell her if she was right about this.

"I don't actually think you're dumb, okay? This is just a joke, don't take it seriously-"

"I know, we all know," Wooyoung assured her, smiling warmly, "carry on."

"...Okay," Seohyun hesitated a bit then started, "Hongjoong is smartest obviously but Jongho is quite smart too? He seems more mature. Then Yeosang or Seonghwa, San somewhere in the middle depending on how awake he is, not sure about Yunho, but Mingi and Wooyoung... well they're pretty close. Because they don't like using their brains..."

"Most of it is accurate," Hongjoong agreed, "Yunho is more lucky than smart."

"Ah.. must be nice to be god's favourite," Seohyun scoffed. "But hey, I like Mingi and Wooyoung. They make you all laugh. That's more important."

Mingi and Wooyoung clapped at that, finally approving.

------------

It was finally after school, when San insisted on accompanying her to her home so she would get there 'safe', that they encountered the old ghost right outside her house.

"Get behind me" San protectively pushed Seohyun behind her.

"I appreciate the gesture, San, but this won't work. Use your brain."

"Oh... Right," San scratched his head and Jiwoo, who had also been with them the entire time, stepped forward.

"We can talk this out like civil human beings and ghosts. Then you can decide if you really want to kill Seohyun."

"NOONA!" San shouted in disbelief but she dismissed him with a wave of her hand.

"Very touching, all this, but I agree, we can have a normal conversation," the old man said.

"How long have you been a ghost exactly?"

"So long that I have forgotten my purpose, girl," the ghost snickered. "I heard from some older ghosts that killing the mediator by our own hands would make us move on."

Seohyun saw San and Jiwoo both tense. "And you thought you'd check?"

The old man nodded. "The mediator before you... Some other ghost killed him. It was some sort of revenge. He was supposed to help me."

"I could help some other way, because killing me doesn't really sound like a solution to me... Like, think about it. It doesn't make sense."

"Are you sure you aren't saying that because you don't want to die yet?" The old man smirked.

"Oh please," Seohyun faked swagger, "If I had an option, I'd kill me too." San shook his head at her.

"Very well. I'll hear you out."

Seohyun explained that she knew an old shaman who helped ghosts with no purpose to move on. It took some convincing and death threats to Seohyun, but she finally made him realize that it might be his one and only option now, and that he should just 'stop being a pain and move the hell on'.

"If it turns out to be a scam, I promise I'll come for you, whether it helps me move on or not."

"Please do," Seohyun replied nonchalantly. The ghost signaled to Jiwoo and they disappeared.

San turned to see that Seohyun was now leaning against the wall, wiping sweat from her forehead as she sighed in relief. "Nice acting."

Seohyun looked at him once before drinking from her water bottle. She had noticed the disapproval in his voice. She stared at him when she was done, and he stared back for a good few seconds before he finally sighed loudly.

"How can you be so... stupid at times like these?"

"How was that stupid? I talked to him and poured sense into him. And it worked. I don't see the problem."

"Does your life mean nothing to you?" San asked.

"San, chill, it was just acting-"

"Those ghosts can touch you!" San was louder this time, making Seohyun flinch a little, "They can hurt you like any other human, hell, they can hurt you in worse ways than that! How can you be so relaxed when gambling with your life?!"

Seohyun watched as San ran a hand through his hair frustratingly, clearly holding himself back. His whole body was tense, his jaw was set and he was not having any of it.

"Are you done?" Seohyun asked, making sure it came out soft. San shook his head.

"I've been seeing ghosts my entire life. My mom took me to all sorts of people for help. You think I don't know how dangerous it is? I learned from the worst. And I'm old enough and experienced enough to know how to handle rogue ghosts like these. Trust me on that."

"I know you are, Seohyun," San admitted, "I just hate it when you talk about your life like it means nothing. Like you'd have no problem if something happened."

"Let's just say I haven't had something I'd like to live for yet," Seohyun said.

San locked eyes with her. "I'll make it change now."

"What?"

"There's so much to life. I know you haven't had the best life, but you have people you can rely on now. And I'll make sure you'll have something to live for."

"What do you live for?" Seohyun asked, curious.

San smiled. "My parents, my grandparents, my friends. And myself."

"Doesn't it... get too much? Living for all of them... must be hard. And boring."

"What's hard and boring is when I had nothing to live for," San said, "When life became repetitive, and I didn't really love anyone, including myself. But now... I have something to look forward to. And no matter if it gets hard, I'll have people to lean on. So ask yourself this, Seohyun. Is it hard living like me or is it hard living like you?"

San knew his words had crossed her, so he locked eyes with her for a second longer before he waved and left for home, leaving Seohyun wondering if she really had wasted all her life repelling people, and if it really had been a wise decision.

prev - next

[xonepeacelovex]

baby, i'm bad news

bad news

Seo Changbin

Getting in a relationship with him will only end in one way, heartbreak. There are many things you’ve prepared yourself when you started dating Changbin. The first one was the public not accepting your relationship especially you are a non-celebrity. Until now your relationship with him is a secret except for your family and his members. 

The second thing was his schedule. Something you both don't have a control over. It was never really a problem for you at first. What do you expect? He’s an artist. His job is to perform around the world. You also strongly believe that is his purpose in life, to write music and share it in which he is doing a good job.

Seo Changbin

Your family adores him even though you are not quite sure for your brother and father. They are both not vocal on hating him but they are both protective for the rare moments Changbin comes over to your house. 

Whenever that happens, your mother will make sure to cook something special. “Eat up Changbin. Don't be shy.”, saying it with motherly smile. Cooking a feast for your boyfriend that sometimes made you question who is really her own child. You are convince that she adores Changbin more than you. Eager for you and Changbin to get married. Slipping the topic of marriage during the sumptuous dinner. In which, every time, you whined at her to stop while Changbin laughs at how cute you are. 

Your father though, he is a quiet man but whenever Changbin takes you home. He always makes sure your bedroom door is open, suspicious of you two. Volunteering to bring the fruits your mother prepared for Changbin so he can enter your bedroom. Lingering eyes on Changbin before exiting your bedroom, making Changbin nervous. You’ll always laugh at Changbin, teasing him. 

You are always the unattractive sibling compared to your siblings. You were never worried about relationships, more focused on achieving your goals. Being the second child, you thrive on the things where your older sister aren’t good which are academics and arts. While your younger brother, is also a heartthrob and you know he broke too much hearts in this lifetime. Always joking he’ll probably suffer in his next lifetime. 

For that reason, your sister didn’t take the news of you dating the Seo Changbin seriously until one day when he took you home. “I thought you are joking.”, in which you just rolled your eyes. From then on, whenever Changbin comes over, she’ll ask him if he has any friends to introduce to her. 

On the other hand, your younger brother is still convincing you to break up with him. “He’ll end up breaking your heart.”, he said to you after you bid goodbye to Changbin one time. “And why?”, you asked irritated at him, entering your house. “Because...”, thinking the reasons Changbin is a bad news. When he can't think of any reasons or more like he can’t say the reasons, you left him there, entering your bedroom. You sigh, plopping down on your bed. Seriously, this family.

Changbin: I have a good time with your family. 

You smile while reading his text message.

You: I thought they scared you enough to break up with me.

Changbin: Don’t say that. I’ll never break up with you.

You: I’ll screenshot this to use against you when the time comes. 

Changbin: You’ll never use that though. 

You: Your way too good with words. 

Changbin: I’ll be flying for the world tour tomorrow night. I miss you already.

You: I miss you too. 

Seo Changbin

The man you are watching from afar. The way he performs on the stage, you can feel his love for this job. You are indeed right when you said to him that the stage is his home. He shines more when he’s performing with Stray Kids. You can’t help but to tear up as you watch him. He is only going up from now on. You feel kinda bad for yourself. You are still indecisive if being a doctor is really your purpose for this life. That night, as you watch your boyfriend performs, you kinda wish you’ve realised your dream sooner. 

When the concert ends, you excitedly went to the backstage, eager to congratulate him and the boys of their successful concert. Your clammy hands holding the bouquet of flowers, you waited for him at the sidelines. He’s extremely busy taking photos with the guests that you waited for hours. 

He was ready to go home when he was informed that you are waiting for him by their manager. You can’t blame their manager because you knew concert is a lot hectic than any other events, thinking that probably he forgot to tell Changbin. With a head hanging low, ready to go home, you left the bouquet at the bench. When he arrived at the bench where you are waiting, he saw a bouquet of his favourite flowers. He immediately looked at his dead phone. Frustrated that he can't call you either. 

With a heavy heart, he went home to pack again, this time for the US tour. 

Seo Changbin

Calling. Your phone lights up with his name on the screen. All the sadness you felt earlier disappeared immediately after seeing his name. You answered it with a happy but groggy tone, “Hey.”. “Hi. Did I wake you up?”, he asked you, worry in his voice. “I’m about to sleep but that’s okay.”, you answered him honestly. “Sorry.”, disappointment can be heard on his voice that it made your stomach churned. Smiling even though he can’t see you, you understand him. “It’s fine. Congratulations for the successful concert. My boyfriend looks cool on stage.” you joked to lighten up the mood.

When he said that the word ‘Sorry’ for the first time you knew it will never be his last one. Changbin knew that also.

Seo Changbin

The inevitable happened too soon. 

The first thing he did when the plane landed on Korea was to call you. After months of not seeing each other, you feel happy and excited. A few minutes of talking over the phone because of time difference is no longer a problem. You have many things to tell him. The first one will be, you are finally decided to take the path of medicine. The months he is in abroad you are busying yourself with studying for the entrance exam of a prestigious medicine school. Today, you received an email that you passed the exam. You wanted Changbin to be the first one to hear the good news. 

You both agreed to meet in the cafe you first met. 

Changbin was sitting quietly, looking outside the cafe. The table doesn't have any drinks on it. You knew that moment that this supposed date will be last the one. 

“I think we should stop before it gets deep.”, he said calmly as he can, confirming your intuition. “I don't want to break your heart.”, looking at your eyes, a glint of sadness in his eyes. “I’m no good for you. Baby, I’m bad news.”

Seo Changbin

The last thing you prepared yourself when you started dating Changbin was the break up. Though you entered this relationship hoping that Changbin will be the first and last, the one you’ll marry someday, your end game. Holding on his words that the situation you are both facing right now will never happen. Now that those words crossed your mind, he never promised anything. Those words you thought were never a promise to begin with. Lucky him. You can’t hold it against him. He knew from the start he can’t keep a promise. 

After collecting your thoughts, you nodded at him. Finally, ready to say something. “But you know what Changbin?”, you asked him a rhetorical question. “I’ve prepared myself for this heart break right from the start because I’ve realized sooner that heart breaks are part of loving you.”. Swallowing the lump forming in your throat, “Thank you though for being a part of my life, Seo Changbin.”, standing up and leaving the cafe before the tears leave your eyes.

 Copyright © 2020 xonepeacelovex All rights reserved.

[laprincesaelena]

EOA Ship Appreciation Week Day 5: Meeting/Farewell

a/n: hi guys! thank you all so much for the positive feedback on my day 4 poem, i’m so glad everyone liked it!! as i said, i know every ship wasn’t included, i ended up having enough time to only do the ones that were requested! but, i’d definitely consider making a part 2, so if your ship wasn’t included this time, it may be another time..

anyways, on to day 5! you may notice i included both prompts here instead of just one..you’ll find out why ;) this story is inspired by an au @procrastinateland (s/o for the beautiful art once again!!!) i came up with together, based on the sound of music! but, this fic in particular doesn’t have much to do with the musical you probably know. my obsession besides elena this summer was researching the lives of the real von trapps who inspired the movie and musical, and through it, i found the adorable love story of the parents of the seven children (georg and agathe, maria wasn’t in the picture yet!) that i knew would be so sweet for gabelena. so that’s what this fic is inspired by! quick historical note, the events that this fic portrays happened in real life in 1910 and 1922, but the years have been switched to 1912 and 1930 for the au, since we decided to place our au closer to the movie’s timeline than the real story. also hi please talk to me about the von trapps i’ve been driving my gf crazy with my useless knowledge lmaooo

and that’s about it! hope you all enjoy this, and let me know what you think!

fic is below the cut!

February 10th, 1912

Lieutenant Gabriel Núñez was amazed as he entered the venue of tonight's celebratory ball, Villa Castillo. He had never been inside a home so grand before, he almost felt as if he didn't deserve to be there. But, regardless, he was invited to attend, along with all of his friends from the navy. He couldn't wait to get away from the structure and seriousness of the military for a night, and to just have fun.

This was the first ball Gabe had been invited to since he became a lieutenant, or ever for that matter, and he was loving it. It was hosted by the Castillo Flores family, a rich family whose inventions had earned them quite the fortune over the past century. As more guests began to make their arrivals, Gabe and his friends hung around together, mingling with other guests or testing out a drink or two. Then, the ball was to officially begin with a musical performance by the hosts.

Now, Gabe wasn't much of a believer of love at first sight, but with one glance, his mind was instantly changed. Standing beside her mother and grandparents, ready to perform their opening song, stood the most beautiful girl he had ever seen, and Gabe knew he was in love. Sure, he knew he had no chance with her, as he was just a lieutenant from a humble family of bakers. She was the daughter of a rich family, and most likely the heir to their fortunes. But, there was no harm in trying, right? He knew that at some point tonight, he just had to talk to this beautiful girl.

Elena Castillo Flores, however, was different. She wholeheartedly believed in chance of falling in love at first sight, but she never thought it would happen to her. She had grown up around these balls, her family had been hosting them for as long as she could remember. And being 17, she had met plenty of men who hoped to marry into her family's fortune, but none of them seemed quite right. That was, until she was about to perform with her family.

She looked out into the crowd, and caught the eye of a handsome naval officer. She smiled softly in his direction, but didn't have time to do anything else, before she picked up her guitar, and began to perform alongside her mother and grandparents.

Gabe couldn't help but keep his eye on this girl the entire time she performed. She was a beautiful singer and guitarist, and Gabe loved hearing every word she sang, and each note she strummed. Before he could snap out of his romantic trance, the performance had ended. Gabe looked up to the stage to see if he could approach the girl, but she her family had left the stage, and were out of sight. So, it was back to just talking with his friends for now. Maybe a good laugh or two could keep his mind off of this girl. In between their backgrounds and the chances that she would choose him out of many much more qualified suitors, Gabe had a feeling this crush was bound to end in disappointment. 

Eventually, Gabe stepped away to go and get his mind off things, but as he was walking, he accidentally bumped into someone. He was about to apologize, but when the person he had bumped into turned to look at him, he realized who he had bumped into: the host's daughter.

Finding his voice again, he said, "I-I'm so sorry for bumping into you, I should have been watching where I was going."

Every once in a while, as she sang and played her guitar, Elena would look out at the man she had seen earlier. He was quite handsome, and she couldn't help but notice the way he smiled at her. But, once the performance was over, she wasn't going to go looking for him. She knew it'd probably be hard to find him in such a big group. Besides, he was probably going to turn out to be like any other man she'd met, and would only take interest in the prospect of inheriting her family's money. So, she carried on with her night, accepting that she'd probably never see him again. That was, until someone bumped into her. When she looked at the person she bumped into, she couldn't help but freeze, it was the lieutenant she had seen earlier. He was the one to speak first, which snapped her back into reality.

“Oh no, no, it's okay! You're fine!" she assured him.

"Oh, alright" Gabe said. He mentally hit himself for not saying more than he did, but whenever he looked at her, he was at a loss for words. He could at least introduce himself, he thought, but every time he did, the words would be at the edge of his tongue, and he'd end up saying nothing. But, he was determined not to blow the only chance he'd ever have with her, so, he gathered up his courage to speak to her once again.

Elena too, would be so, so close to saying something, even just introducing herself, but before the words could come out, she'd freeze. She so desperately wanted to get to know him better, and she knew the only way to do so was to just say something. But, luckily for her, he said something first.

"This has been a wonderful ball so far." Gabe finally said.

"Oh, well, thank you.." Elena replied with a smile. "I'm glad you're enjoying it so far."

"I am" Gabe said, returning the smile. Finally, he decided, he was actually going to introduce himself. "I'm Lieutenant Gabriel Núñez," he said. "but you can call me Gabe."

Elena quietly sighed with relief, she was glad he introduced himself first, it gave her the confidence to do the same. "I'm Elena Castillo Flores," she introduced. "but you can just call me Elena."

"It's very nice to meet you, miss Elena," Gabe replied, with a bow of his head to her.

"It's very nice to meet you too, lieutenant," Elena responded. "Oh, I mean Gabe, it's nice to meet you too, Gabe." she added, and shook her head at herself. Hopefully she didn't blow her chance with him right then and there.

Gabe smiled and laughed softly, he couldn't help but fall deeper in love with the girl the longer he talked to her. He had managed to find her, talk to her, and introduce himself, but there was one more step with her he wanted to take.

"I hope this isn't too soon, but would you like to dance?" he asked.

Elena's face now lit up with a smile, it most certainly wasn't too soon, she was so excited he asked her to dance with him! She nodded, and held out her hand to him. "I would love to dance," she said.

Gabe took her hand with a smile, and lead her to the center of the ballroom. With one of his hands tightly in the grasp of hers, his other hand wrapped around her waist, the two began their first dance.

As the pair glided effortlessly across the floor, Elena still couldn't believe that this was happening. How did she ever get so lucky? But, she also knew that there was a possibility that he might have happened to only attend this ball, and she may never see him again. She truly hoped this wasn't the case, she wanted to get to know him better and spend more time with him, because she knew for a fact she was falling in love.

Gabe could barely believe this was happening either. This beautiful girl had really said agreed to dance with him, and now they were actually dancing? Gabe truly hoped that he wasn't dreaming, for he never wanted to wake up. He wanted this dance to last forever, so he would never have to say goodbye to Elena, and go back to living his life without her in it. There was hardly a chance he would see her again after the ball ended, but he kept a glimmer of hope that tonight was not their final encounter.

Elena wasn't paying attention to anything else around her, for all that mattered to her now was that she was actually dancing with Gabe! She planned to dance with him for the entire night, if it meant she'd be able to spend as much time as possible with him. She knew that once the ball ended, there was a high possibility of her never seeing him again. So, she was going to make sure to spend as much time with him as she possibly could, while she had the opportunity.

After a couple of hours of guests talking, eating, drinking, and dancing the night away, the ballroom began to empty out a bit. Elena brought Gabe outside to a balcony, so she'd be able to talk with him and get to know him better without any sort of distraction.

"So, being a lieutenant, I'm assuming you're in the military, the... navy, correct?" she asked him, to start some conversation.

"Yes," Gabe answered. "I joined as soon as I was able, I've always wanted to be a part of the navy. My parents, especially my father, aren't too happy I chose this path instead of joining their baking business, but this is what I really wanted to do."

"Oh, your parents have a baking business?" Elena asked him. "Not too much of a baker, are you?" she joked.

"No," Gabe replied. "and I'm not much of an olaball player either, to the dismay of my father."

"It certainly seems as if your father isn't too thrilled with your life choices... but do you love what you do?" Elena asked.

"Yes, I do." Gabe responded with a smile. "Besides, if I hadn't made the decision to go against his wishes and join the navy, I probably wouldn't be talking to you right now."

Elena smiled as she felt her cheeks warm up at his sweet response. She was so, so glad that Gabe decided to follow his own path in life instead of listening to his father, because if he didn't, they may have never met.

"Well, I guess you're right," she said. "and I'm glad that you're doing something that you love, that's what should really matter."

Gabe nodded in agreement. "What's your family like?" he asked.

"Well, there's me, my mother, my younger sister, my grandparents," Elena answered. "we're all pretty close, and we love to make music together."

"I can tell, you and your family sounded amazing tonight," Gabe said. "and not to be biased, but I think I liked your singing the most."

Elena smiled, and put a hand to her cheek, she was definitely blushing now. "Thank you," she said. "but I wouldn't say I'm the best of them, they're all very talented.."

"I would," Gabe responded, and reached down to take her hand in his own.

"Well, thank you.." Elena replied, holding Gabe's hand tightly back. "and I may be biased, but I'd say you're my favorite lieutenant, because I totally know all the others." she said.

Elena laughed nervously for a moment after that attempt at flirting. 'what was that, Elena?' she asked herself.

"Thank you," Gabe said with a smile.

"You're welcome," Elena responded, a similar smile never leaving her face.

"So, what do you like to do other than make music?" Gabe asked her.

"I love just getting out with my family most times, of course. We'll go on hikes, go sailing, go to one of our vacation homes or visit someone else in our family's home, we're always somewhere or doing something." Elena told him. "How about you?" she asked.

"I like fencing," Gabe replied. "We sometimes have competitions between my friends and I, and not to brag, but I usually win."

"I'm sure you do," Elena responded, definitely believing him. "and I'd love to learn to fence sometime, it actually looks pretty fun!"

"Well, I'd be happy to teach you," Gabe offered. "I'm sure it'd be considered "unladylike," but if it was just us, it wouldn't really matter."

"What my mother and grandparents don't know won't kill them," Elena replied with a wink. "I'd love for you to teach me sometime!"

"I'd be more than happy to teach you," Gabe responded.

"And hopefully you can sometime," Elena said, before sighing as she remembered the reason why she was so hesitant to find him in the first place. The chances of the two reuniting were slim to none. "I hope we see each other again..."

"Me too..." Gabe replied, looking down with a sigh as well. "Maybe we could write to each other? To keep in contact?" he suggested.

"I'd love that." Elena said, smiling once again at the thought of it. "We definitely should."

Gabe smiled. "Alright," he said. "I'll give you my address."

"And I'll give you mine as well, which is right here, but I'll still write it down so you'll always have it" Elena said.

"Thank you," Gabe replied. "I look forward to writing to you, and seeing you again, Miss Elena."

"And I look forward to writing and seeing you again as well, Lieutenant Núñez." Elena responded with a smile.

Gabe laughed a bit and rolled his eyes, but still smiled. "Please, you can just call me Gabe," he said.

"And you can just call me Elena," Elena insisted. "No 'miss' necessary"

"Alright then, Elena it is." Gabe said, smiling over at her.

"And Gabe it is." Elena replied, sharing the same, loving smile.

At that moment, the both of them knew that they had met the love of their life. Though they'd have a difficult road ahead, in between having to communicate with letters for a while or with Gabe often traveling with the navy, they were determined to make it work. Gabe was not going to let his beautiful Elena go, and Elena knew that tonight she had met the man she was going to marry. They were going to spend the rest of their lives together, no matter what.

September 3rd, 1930

On Christmas night of 1929, Gabe and Elena's oldest daughter began to feel unwell. It was simply strep throat, they were told, she should recover in a matter of days. But, by the time eleven year old Catalina had recovered, five of her seven siblings had fallen ill as well. The sudden illness turned out not to be a simple case of strep throat, but the highly contagious scarlet fever, which was currently spreading through the city.

Of course, Elena was always there to care for her children, even if she was risking contracting the illness herself. For the next few weeks, she was constantly visiting her children and checking in on them, while still trying to stay healthy herself. But, when her youngest daughter, Martina, who wasn't even a year old yet, came down with a severe case, Elena had no choice but to step in and care for her, twenty four-seven.

By the end of January, Elena's caring and motherly nature had led her to catching scarlet fever herself. In children, the illness tended to be fairly mild, but in adults, it could often leave behind serious side effects. Gabe knew this, and insisted that his wife take the time to rest in order to recover. But, Elena insisted that her children came first, wanting to be there for each and every one of them as they recovered.

But, even when all seven children were happy and healthy once again, Elena's symptoms had not subsided. Now, she could rest and recover with a sound mind, knowing that her children would be alright without her for a couple of days. Those couple of days turned into weeks, those weeks into months, and by the end of August, Elena still had a long road to recovery. She was now bound to a wheelchair, she would have to learn to walk all over again due to the toll the illness had taken on her body. She still tried to spend as much time as possible with her children, and be the happy, loving, and healthy mamí they had always known. But, deep down, she knew if scarlet fever had already taken so much from her, it could continue to do so.

Over the next week, Elena's condition quickly deteriorated, and it seemed as if only a miracle could heal her. Gabe had visited his wife each and every day for the duration of her sickness, but for the past day or two, he hadn't left her side at all. He knew that at any time, her condition could take a turn for the absolute worst, and he didn't want to take the chance of not having a chance to say goodbye. While Gabe tried his best to stay somewhat positive, and hope that his wife would miraculously recover, he knew Elena's time left was short.

Gabe's eyes were heavy as he sat at his wife's bedside, having stayed awake the entire night with her. He held Elena's hand tightly in his, even though Elena barely had the strength left to hold his. It broke his heart to see his wife in this condition, he would do absolutely anything to bring back the bright light of his life that was Elena.

Gabe's heart would sink as he noticed his wife's breathing become labored. He had been mentally preparing himself for the worst, just in case, but he knew that no matter how much he had prepared, he would never be ready if that moment arrived. He felt the slightest bit of relief when he noticed Elena slowly turn her head to look over at him, using all of her strength to do so.

"Elena.." he began to say, even saying her name brought tears to his eyes. But before he could say anything else, his wife managed to speak up.

"Gabe.." she said, her voice in a whisper. "Please..tell our children how much I love them.."

"Elena, no..no, don't talk like that.." Gabe said to her. Though he was trying to preserve his wife's positivity, he was also in denial about all this.

"Tell each and every one of them..each and every day..how much I love them.." Elena said. "And that I'll always be with them.."

Gabe held Elena's hand tight as he fought to hold back his tears, but even then, a tear or two would manage to fall down his cheek. He looked over at his wife, he still thought she was the most beautiful woman in the world, even with a scarlet red rash covering her cheeks, and her hair sticking to her fevered forehead. If it were possible, he would do anything to end all of her pain and suffering, but he knew that at this point, there was only one option for that.

Trying to clear his mind of these thoughts, Gabe nodded. "Of course I will.. I promise.." he said.

Elena smiled as best as she could, but to Gabe, it was the brightest smile he had seen out of her in a while. "Thank you.." she said. "A-and I love you..so, so much.."

"I love you too.." Gabe replied, and leaned down to kiss his wife. Thankfully, Elena was no longer contagious, but even if she was, Gabe would take that chance if it meant kissing his beloved Elena one last time.

Then, it looked as if Elena were about to speak, but she was unable to get any word out. Finally, a moment later, she managed to say, "And.."

Gabe patiently waited as his wife struggled to say a second word. He would wait for as long as it took her, he'd take any opportunity to hear the voice he loved so much.

"I'm..a-always.." Elena said, now needing to take multiple labored breaths between each word. Though it was a struggle, Elena managed to complete her sentence.

"I'm always with you.."

A moment later, after months and months of fighting to recover, Elena's body gave in, and her eyes slowly closed.

Gabe could feel his wife's grip on his hand loosen, and his heart immediately dropped. This couldn't be happening. He couldn't lose her.

"Elena? Elena! Elena, no! Mi amor, please!" Gabe desperately cried, hoping that his wife's beautiful brown eyes would open again. But no matter how many times he called her name, they remained peacefully closed, as her body grew paler.

Now, Gabe's denial began to truly set in. He lightly shook her, he held her hand tight, he kissed her forehead, her cheeks, her lips, all in an effort to wake her, even though deep down, he knew that his efforts were in vain. Finally, it all became too much for him, and Gabe just broke down. he couldn't picture his life without Elena, he never thought everything would end this way.

He thought of his wife, she had so much more to live for. she was a loving wife, a caring mother, his best friend. Then he pictured their seven children, who would now be growing up without their mother. He thought of their identical twins, though they were already quite different, they shared a similarity, devotion to their family. Catalina and Carolina absolutely adored their mother, and looked up to her, along with being her best friends. He thought of Luis, their oldest son, he was a mamí's boy. He loved cuddling up with his mother and listen to her play guitar, he wanted to learn from her one day. He thought of their youngest son, Marcelo, their bundle of energy, who sometimes even Elena couldn't keep up with. He thought of Luciana and Adelina, aged only five and two, who would be too little to understand why their mamí had suddenly disappeared. And finally, he thought of Martina, their baby girl who would grow up without a mother. She would never get know her mamí, or even remember her. In fact, he didn't know if any of their younger children would be able to remember their mother.

Gabe found himself growing a bit dizzy, since this all seemed like he was living a nightmare. His hands shook as he held Elena's tightly in his own, and his vision was blurred from his tears.

As his final moments with Elena played over and over in his head, he was reminded of his wife's dying wish. To remind each and every one of their children each and every day how much their mamí loves them. If Elena could see him now, she'd hate to see him this distraught. She'd encourage him to keep his head up and stay strong, but how could he ever move on in life without his Elena? His children. He knew he needed to stay strong and carry on for them. Though, of course, carrying on could take weeks, months, or even years, Elena would want him to be happy. But most of all, she'd want her children to be happy and loved as well.

So, then and there, Gabe dedicated himself to fulfilling Elena's wish. For the rest of his life, he would make sure his children are happy, healthy, and loved, just as Elena would do. Though it would be difficult to carry on without her, the Núñez Castillos still had each other, and that's what matters most.

[supertransural]

Beyond the Mat, sort of meta?

Ok so for some personal context, I’ve been rewatching all of Supernatural and i have the firm intention to keep the show on repeat on my computer/tv until i’ve fully binged it 15 times (never fear, I am already perfectly aware of how bad a decision this is). I wrote this post with a frantic need to get all the thoughts out, but it happened to be 3am at the time, and I realized I had to make gifs and upload them which was obviously too much work for a sleep deprived brain. I put it off until the next day, but ended up procrastinating and now it's been sitting in my drafts for 3 months and I thought hey this is a good time to finish it up (it could be argued that i'm polishing up this thing at 5am and this doesn't seem to be an issue for my will to get this done this time around, although I am heavily caffeinated so maybe that has something to do with it, go figure).

Anyways that’s besides the point. At the time I had just gotten to 11x15, Beyond the Mat. I’ve seen people write a lot about how parallels between Sam and Dean’s love lives/interests are part of the subtext about Dean’s bisexuality. I’ve also read people's works about how Gunner is pretty obviously one of Dean’s youth celebrity crushes. But (and I might just be a bit blind or haven’t looked hard enough) I haven’t seen a lot about the parallel between Sam/Rio and Dean/Gunner.

So let's get down to business, shall we?

The scene I will be focusing on starts out with Dean utterly star struck, sort of mumbling awkwardly his reasoning for coming up to Gunner (x) (x). Interestingly enough, Sam does the exact same thing with Rio (x) (x), while Dean is in the other corner clasping Gunner's hand for way too long and way too tight, and giving him the “i’ve loved you ever since i met you” look (x) (x).

Now since Sam’s crush is strictly heterosexual and we all know Sam’s interest in women, he outright says it to Rio (this is, after all, the CW) (x) (x). Dean on the other hand doesn’t verbalize it in so many words (the CW), but cmon... That fluster when Gunner winks at him later on?? (x) (let's not forget the little leg pat (x) that is probably still etched in Dean's memory amongst the 20 best things that ever happened to him, behind the previously-mentioned-wink and the Cartwright Twins) Or his reaction to Gunner patting his arm, "ok ok don't panic, it's not like your childhood crush just touched you oh wait". And Literally His Unwavering Smile The Whole Way Through. Jacting choices, people, Jacting choices (x).

Sam saves himself by steering the conversation towards a type of "where are they now?" interview, and Rio follows his not-so-subtle attempt, with a heavily implied tint of nostalgia for the good old days (x). Dean pulls a very similar stunt, mentioning something about his and Gunner's past (x) (x). Rio and Gunner's faces in those clips resemble each other quite a great deal: the emotion is the same, regret.

I really love that parallel because it’s really just “in your face”. You see Dean getting all flustered, at that point you could still say “hey i love [insert celebrity] and i don’t have a crush on them, but i’d probably still react that way around them”. (First of all, if I were you, I'd go on a journey of soul searching because hello, it’s ok to have crushes on celebrities you wish you didn’t, we’ve all been 12 and we’ve all seen Twilight and we’re all ashamed, and second of all, would you really and I mean really react that same way?) But then, enters Sam and his old crush, from the same field, basically the same time period, the same place and roughly the same "community". And it’s an unapologetic crush, not just a “hhhahaha i loved your uh.... your work.... as a uh kid haha.....”. Nonono. He says it, he tells her that he “used” (i’m not sure it’s completely gone, just like Dean) to have a crush on her. And then boom, parallel.

The way the two interact with both “celebrities” isn’t that different, if anything, Sam is less awkward around Rio than Dean is with Gunner. I’m betting the reason why is that since Sam’s crush is a woman, he has 1: talked about it openly before with his family (a poster of your crush on your wall is a good way to do that) and 2: talked to other crushes like her before. Dean, for obvious reasons, has not. Not a man, maybe some girlfriends, but he was never open (specifically not to John) about a potential crush he had on the big wrestler man in the ring, because he’s supposed to be this manly manly ladies man. He’s much more awkward because he hasn’t had much of an opportunity to talk to his crushes that might have been men, so the entire ordeal is wayyy more foreign to him. And he was also just a fan, so the whole “oh my god oh my god” of the crush is added to the already existing “oh my god oh my god” of his inner (and outer let's not kid ourselves) fanboy self.

Dean’s reaction is incidentally very similar to the one he has in the Fat Spa in 9x13, The Purge, with the character called Larry, Maritza’s husband. Dean’s awkward, goes too far, slightly flustered, and he’s pretty clearly not thrown off because of Maritza in that interview room, his gaze is mostly going from Sam to Larry then back to Sam. He lightly brushes over Maritza but barely looks at her (x) (x).

I’d also like to point out that when Gunner enters the stage, there’s a hint at a bi flag created by the light show, blink and you'll miss it (x). But then again that could just be the fact that those lights look pretty together and I'm completely insane. I’m not going to push that one too far, but since Gunner winks at Dean after that, which as I said before, makes Dean look adorably happy and flustered..... Take that as you will.

There's a thousand other scenes relevant to Dean being very blatantly bi-coded in Beyond the Mat (seriously, it's almost as obvious as the siren episode) but I really just wanted to focus on the parallel this time. I might go even more in depth on that episode (or do it bit by bit) if I ever find the will to make more gifs and string intelligible words together to create coherent sentences, and give off the impression of a sane mind. Might even throw in some The Purge meta for fun. Yes my definition of fun is quite warped.

[babieyangyang10]

violent ends (chapter 2)

(chapter 2)

series masterlist

genre: hunger games!au

pairing: huang renjun x oc, na jaemin x oc

warnings: language, violent deaths, fighting, angst, fluff, + possible nsfw.

A/N: please keep in mind that events/ideas from the original hunger games franchise have been purposefully altered! thanks.

previous | next

"In the event of the uprising, each of the twelve districts must offer one boy and one girl tribute to participate in the Hunger Games, and must strictly be the ages of 12 through 18. The contestants will be put into an outdoor arena where they must survive all types of danger and fight to the death, or leave it up to nature. The last tribute standing wins. It is both a time for repentance and a time for thanks." explained the Mayor of my district. I honestly wouldn't be surprised if he uses the same speech every year. Even after my seven years of attending reapings, the anticipation for them to actually announce the names never gets easier.

I know I'm not the only one. The girls standing around me either look like they're seconds away from throwing up their last meal or simply about to explode from excitement.

"In the past seventy-three Hunger Games, we have had numerous victors representing the great district two. The victor representing district two, who will now mentor the tributes is here today." The mayor teasingly paused, "He needs no introduction, please give a warm welcome for Lee Taeyong!"

I felt my body go cold, almost as if I were seeing a ghost. There he was, my older brother, standing on the stage. He was adorned in expensive clothes from the Capitol. Standing tall, his striking features could easily be intimidating. However, his expression was relaxed and pleased; taking in the love and admiration from the crowd. Just by looking at him, anyone could tell he was made for this.

They loved him.

"Now, please welcome to the podium, the Capitol representative for our district, Kim Doyoung." The Mayor stepped off to stand beside Taeyong. In his place, stood a man with royal blue hair and an outrageously yellow suit. He smiled brightly, despite receiving piercing silence from the crowd.

  He spoke cheerfully in the microphone, "Happy Hunger Games! And may the odds be ever in your favor! Due to an overwhelming amount of volunteers in the past games, your leaders have collectively decided to choose their tributes, according to who best represents the district as a whole."

He grabs a card from the pockets of his suit. Leaning into the microphone, he explains, "Here, I have the names of your male and female tributes." He pauses, carefully glancing over the text in his hands.

    "Huang Renjun and Lee Athena."

I let out the air held captive in my lungs. The heads in front of me have turned around to observe. Unable to hide amongst the crowd any longer, Taeyong was staring at me. I struggled trying to read his expression, which was blank. I felt my chest sink to the floor, heavily. Shouldn't he be excited for me?

Suddenly, I felt a sharp tug on my arm.

"You might want to start moving. Seriously, you're looking pretty stupid right now. "

I turn to my left to see Renjun frowning at me, who has stepped out of the boy's side and into the middle aisle. Coming to my senses, I follow him as the Peacekeepers escort us to the stage.

"Here we are! Our tributes from district two." Doyoung announces in between Renjun and I.

  I hear a deep, familiar voice from behind me muttering a quiet, "Smile."

   Automatically, I change my shocked expression to a brighter one. Meanwhile, I  scan the cheering crowd's faces; taking in the mixed looks of joy, pity, and even jealousy.

"Well, aren't you two going to shake hands?" inquired Doyoung, stepping backwards.

   Turning to look at Renjun, I see the look of hesitation in his face. Internally grimacing, I offer my trembling hand. He softly sighs before giving a bone-crushing handshake.

"Happy Hunger Games and may the odds be ever in your favor." speaks a gleaming Doyoung to the crowd. I feel Taeyong  place his hand on my back, pushing me towards a set of doors. Once opened by the Peacekeepers, Doyoung, Taeyong, Renjun, and I enter the Justice Building. A Peacekeeper instructs me to wait in a room and closes the door behind me.

It’s relieving and oddly comforting to finally be alone. My chest no longer feels the heavy fluttering it did before. However, I can’t decide if I’m still shaking from the adrenaline or perhaps nerves. By the time the door reopens, I have gathered my thoughts. My mother and father appear in front of me. My father has a stoic and firm expression on his face, while my mother is energetically clinging to his arm.

“You have three minutes.” announces the Peacekeeper, before closing the door. My mom engulfs me in an gigantic hug. I awkwardly freeze, not really accustomed to displays of affection. However, she pays to mind to this and cheerily states, “I’m so excited for you. I know you are going to do great!”

My father grabs my shoulders and sternly councils me, “Listen to everything Taeyong tells you. Be smart and remember everything you’ve learned until this point. Don’t let your guard down, no matter how much you think you can trust someone. At the end of the day, you can only trust your own judgement.”

I nodded, my heart glowing with pride. I finally achieved the reward I’ve been working for this whole time. Getting to see the surprise in their eyes, knowing they never saw my masked potential. How did the black sheep of our family manage to pull off this?

“Time.” announces the Peacekeeper. My mom pulls me in for another hug. After she releases me, my father shockingly gives me a subtle nod before leaving with my mother.

After a short and silent car ride, accompanied by Doyoung and Renjun. We were ushered into a train, avoiding a swarm of eager reporters. At the main cart, Doyoung is sitting across from Renjun and I. The small table contains various foods and deserts intended for our pleasure.

Doyoung attempts to break the awkward silence, “We’re currently going 200 miles and you barely even feel a thing. I think that’s just one of the good things about this opport-“

“Where is Taeyong?” I interrupted, not really listening.

Doyoung let’s out a puff of air before standing up, “I think he’s in one of the other carts. I’ll go find him.” Once he leaves, Renjun harshly states, “Thank God, that man talks too much.”

I let out a hum of agreement, taking a sip from my teacup.

He starts, “I must say, you really surprised me. With your low scores, I really thought there was no way you’d be picked. Then, I told myself, the only reason is because of that brother of hers.”

I grabbed a knife from the table and shoved him down onto the couch. My legs were wrapped around his waist, hands pressing the knife into his throat. His eyes were wide, while his lips were slightly parted in shock.

“You really can’t go five seconds without talking the same old shit, huh? Didn’t even see this coming, you dumb little fuck.” I taunt him.

“You look pretty good on top of me like this.” He says, lips curling up into an evil smile. Before I could respond, I hear the sound of voices and look up. Renjun takes this opportunity to shove me off him, onto the floor. I quickly push myself up onto my hands and knees. Then, Doyoung and Taeyong came barging in through the door.

“Is everything okay? I heard some noises!” asked a frantic Doyoung.

Renjun answers innocently with, “We’re fine. She just dropped her knife on the floor.” I returned the knife to the table and went to my spot on the couch. As Taeyong and Doyoung sit down on the other side of the table, I subtly send an evil glare towards Renjun.

Taeyong glances over the two of us, “You two know almost everything there is about weapons and survival. There really is nothing I can teach you that you don’t already know. However, one of the things the two of you are going to have to focus on is making people love you. Keep in mind, you are going to be on a reality television show. People will watch and provide whatever you need, as long as you are of interest to them. If you want to get technical, the more you boost the ratings, the higher the probability is that you are to be kept around. You do this by playing a character. Rather it be a villain or a hero, it’s your choice. For example, you could be the pure and innocent type or an object of desire for the opposite sex. I hope you really take your time to decide what fits you best.”

“Taeyong, have you heard anything about the other tributes? Anything we should concern ourselves with?” I curiously asked.

He nodded his head, “District 1 has Lee Jeno and Lee Donghyuck. Both also trained since they were kids. Top of their schools in everything. Also, District 4 has Na Jaemin. Like his mentor, Finnick Odair, he specializes in spearing. I wouldn’t be surprised if he ends up playing the same womanizer-character as him as well. Be careful, any of them could really be either the greatest threat to your game or the reason you end up winning the whole thing.”

[thedailyimagines]

Imagine working at Freddy’s Pizzeria, and telling your dad something is wrong. (Part One)

Description: The reader just got a new job at Freddy Fazbear’s. He thinks something is up and is proven right on the first night. Maybe his dad can help? This is the family business...

.

So I’ve never played FNAF, but from one reddit thread I gathered that it takes place in Utah. Please let me know if this is wrong!

~~~~~~~~

Another day, another motel in Nowhere, Utah. Y/n was starting to wonder if his dad and uncle actually knew what they were doing or if they were just taking a break from their case. They had already been here three days.

“So...when are we leaving?” Dean didn’t look up from the newspaper he was reading.

“Sam said the guy we’re talking with could need us for about another week. Maybe two.” Groaning, y/n flopped back onto the motel bed. He was so bored!

“Can I help?”

“No. Too dangerous and I can’t be worried about you getting hurt while working.” Y/n started to pick at one of the threads on the comforter.

“Sam will be there, he can keep an eye on me too.” Dean finally looked up from his newspaper.

“Y/n. I understand you want to help but I need to know your safe. That means sitting out on this one, okay?”

“Fine. But I’m helping next time.” Dean smiled and nodded in agreement.

“Alright.”

<—>

Help Wanted: Nightguard; Details inside.

That was the sign that greeted y/n when he went on a food run. The pizzeria looked run down, but hopefully looks were deceiving; otherwise it was burgers again.

“Whatever. Anything is better than burgers again.” Y/n opened the door of the pizzeria and was greeted to possibly the saddest place he’d ever seen. The restaurant looked empty and outdated, and the animal robots—animatronics, y/n told himself—on the stage were...actually kinda creepy.

“Hi! Welcome to Freddy Fazbear’s Pizzeria, how can I help you?” A cheerful voice broke through the silent restaurant, and y/n found himself faced with a waitress probably just older than himself.

“Yeah. You guys are open, right? I didn’t walk in when you were about to close?”

“We’re still open!” Y/n nodded and almost took a step back from the waitress. She was almost scary perky.

“Okay, cool. I didn’t want to walk in at the last minute. Do you have a menu I could look at?”

“Yep, here you go!” Glancing at the menu, the majority of it seemed to be character themed pizzas. Y/n decided to make conversation as he looked for something the three Winchesters would all like.

“I saw your ad about the night guard position on the door—” Y/n was cut off before he could finish.

“Oh, are you going to apply? Here, let me get my manager!” Before y/n was able to ask for more details, the overly perky waitress had gone into a back room. She returned with a balding man who was smiling widely.

“Good afternoon! So, you’re interested in the night guard job?” Y/n shook his head.

“I was actually just curious. And looking for someplace to grab lunch.” The manager’s face fell.

“Oh, my bad. I thought you were hoping to apply for the position.”

“I mean, what exactly are the details? I might know someone who could apply.” He really didn’t, but y/n felt sorta bad for getting the older man excited for nothing.

“Well, it’s a temporary position. Five nights, and all you have to do is stay in the security office.” Temporary? Maybe y/n could do this job and get some spare cash. He could use some new tires for his bike...

“That’s it?” The manager nodded.

“Yep! It does have a low pay, but we are going out of business soon and don’t have the funds to pay much more than $200.”

“I see. Could I apply?” Placing his chin in his hand, the manager looked y/n up and down.

“It depends. How old are you?”

“I’m eighteen years old.” A lie, but y/n highly doubted the man would hire a sixteen year old. He looked old enough to be eighteen (at least, Sam said he did).

“Alright. And do you have any serious health problems or conditions?” That wasn’t something y/n was expecting. Wasn’t there paperwork for this kind of thing?

“Uh...no?” The manager grinned widely. It was a bit unsettling.

“Great! Can you start tomorrow?” Y/n’s eyes widened. Was this even legal?

“Wait, seriously? That’s it?”

“Yep! And don’t worry about buying a uniform, we’ll provide you with a shirt.”

“Alright then. What time do I come in?” The manger went back to his office, returning with a shirt and a sheet of paper.

“Just be here before twelve AM. Your shift ends at six. This paper has all the details and my number in case of emergency.” Y/n took the shirt and paper from the manager.

“Got it. And one more thing?” The manager raised an eyebrow.

“Yes?”

“Can I order a large cheese pizza?”

<—>

“That was possibly the grossest pizza I’ve ever eaten.” Dean pushes his plate away, one slice still left on it. Y/n took another bite of his and grimaced, wondering how exactly you screwed up a pizza this bad.

“Don’t blame me, I didn’t make it.” Sam set his plate down, all the cheese gone on his slice after it slid off.

“Where did you get it? So we know to avoid that place.”

“Place called Freddy Fazbear’s. Also I kinda-sorta-maybe got a temporary job there.” Dean choked on his soda and Sam had a surprised look on his face.

“Wait, what?” Y/n put his hands up defensively.

“So this place needed a night guard for like five nights and I figured since we’re going to be here for a while, it wouldn’t hurt!” Dean shook his head and turned to his son.

“Y/n—” Y/n interrupted before his father could finish speaking.

“Dad, it’s only five nights in a building that was empty in the middle of the day. It’s probably just as empty at night.” Dean rubbed the back of his neck.

“I’m not sure it’s a good idea...” Y/n rolled his eyes and took a drink of his soda.

“Seriously. It’s six hours of watching a restaurant in the middle of the night. What could possibly happen?”

<—>

Y/n parked his bike outside the pizzeria and chained it to the bike rack. Even at night the place was creepy, possibly creepier. Making sure he had the keys he received earlier, y/n headed inside.

It was eerily quiet without the music playing from the speakers. The animatronics were on the stage, and y/n couldn’t help but shudder as he walked by them.

“Creepy as hell, but entertaining to kids.” Y/n snorted, walking quickly away from the stage. He soon found the security office. From a quick look around, it appeared that all y/n would have were the cameras.

“Right. Let’s see...I guess I’ll just sit and play on my phone?” At that exact moment, the office phone rang. Y/n picked it up to hear the tone for a prerecorded message.

"Hello, hello? Uh, I wanted to record a message for you to help you get settled in on your first night. Um, I actually worked in that office before you. I'm finishing up my last week now, as a matter of fact. So, I know it can be a bit overwhelming, but I'm here to tell you there's nothing to worry about. Uh, you'll do fine. So, let's just focus on getting you through your first week. Okay? Thinking it was just a welcoming message, y/n began poking around the small office while the message played on. There really wasn’t much in there, and the doors had weird buttons near them.

“...So, you could imagine how having your head forcefully pressed inside one of those could cause a bit of discomfort...and death. Uh, the only parts of you that would likely see the light of day again would be your eyeballs and teeth when they pop out the front of the mask, heh.”

“Wait, what?” Before y/n could entirely process what the phone guy said, he accidentally knocked the phone down and unplugged it from the wall. Y/n scrambled to plug it back in but the message was already gone. “Shit!”

Slumping down in the chair, y/n ran a hand through his hair. Why would he possibly be at risk of dying? It was only a night guard job! That was when he spotted the note on the desk.

“Seriously, what the hell is up with this place?” Y/n decided to take a look at the cameras. Yep, there were all the animatronics—where was the rabbit? Flipping through each camera, y/n kept an eye open for the rabbit until—

“There! Wait, that’s down the hall. Is it coming here?” Y/n quickly jumped out of his chair and ran to the door, hitting the button to shut it. Not a second later the rabbit was outside, trying to get in.

It didn’t stop after the rabbit left. The whole night, each animatronic kept trying to get inside the office. At one point, three animatronics

At 5:57, y/n lost power.

“It’s fine. There’s only three minutes left.”

5:58. Two minutes. The fox animatronic entered the office, and lunged towards y/n. He ducked out of the way and bit back a scream at the hook cutting deep into his shoulder.

The fox turned around for a second go, and—

—it straightened, turned, and left the office, leaving behind a very confused y/n. As soon as the manager arrived, y/n booked it back to the motel he, his father and his uncle were staying at.

<—>

“Hey, did you see where I left my keys?” Y/n didn’t pay attention, too focused on his research to notice Dean talking to him.

“Y/n?” Y/n glanced up at his father, one eyebrow raised.

“What?”

“Did you hear what I said?” Y/n shook his head.

“Sorry, I was busy. What’s up?”

“My keys, do you know where they are?” Y/n pretended to be deep in thought for a moment.

“Uhh...your pocket?” Dean rolled his eyes.

“Very funny. What’s got you so occupied?” Y/n turned his laptop around to face Dean, a search for ‘Freddy’s pizzeria’ displayed on the screen.

“The animatronics at the place I’m working tried to kill me last night. Also I should probably look into getting a tetanus shot.” Sam peeked out from the bathroom door with a confused expression.

“What?” Y/n pulled the collar of his shirt to the side, revealing a bloody bandage to his father and uncle. Dean’s eyes widened in shock.

“What the hell happened to you?!?!”

“I told you, a robot pirate fox with a hook tried to kill me!”

~~~~~~~~

I don’t own the above gif, all credit goes to the owner.

[justinsdaysinthedark]

Post #8 - So long, friend

Sunday August 4th: Today marks 3 weeks I've been in hospital and day 5 of my 16 day chemotherapy treatment. Before I left to head in here on the 14th of July, I joked with Courtney's dad, John that I'd beat his record for time in hospital (3 consecutive weeks) not thinking it would actually happen. Alas, when I wake up tomorrow morning, I'll own that title; one I'd definitely prefer not to have! Here I was thinking I'd be in here for a few days. I suppose in retrospect my breakdown in the middle of Coles 21 days ago was for good reason!

As mentioned earlier, I had my fifth day of chemotherapy today and everything has gone smoother than I thought. I had an incredibly difficult two days on Thursday and Friday (days two and three) with nausea, headaches, incredibly tired and just generally not feeling myself. A lot of this I put down to a couple of bad nights sleep and the chemo finally hitting my body and doing its thing. Saturday and today (days four and five) have fortunately been the total opposite, which is great for me! I've had more energy, less nauseas and just generally felt myself (as well as I can, I suppose!)

I know some of you are wondering what it's like to get chemotherapy...and that's a valid question. Let me preface my answer by reminding everybody that it affects different individuals in different ways. How I react to this chemotherapy plan won't be how anybody else does. I guarantee that! Essentially, it's just like having a fluid drip with a few warning labels on the packet. Some I've felt average during them or a few hours afterwards whereas others I haven't exactly noticed a difference. It's important to keep in mind that chemotherapy isn't the drug itself, it's a word used to cover a wide range of drugs which when used a certain way should assist with treatment of cancer. Much like the word 'car' doesn't distinguish what sort of car one owns - there's a big difference between a '92 Camry and a '19 Jag!

The next two days are 'rest days' for me, which I'm absolutely ecstatic about! Two days without chemo will be a great chance for my body to relax and recover from five days of being pumped with various chemicals.

Day 10 is when things pick up again volume wise and from them until the finish, I'll basically be on a drip 24/7 and constantly have to be monitored - totally different to these first five days.

How have I been going mentally? It's up and down like the hillsides in Tasmania! For the most part, I'm great and remaining as positive as one can be in such circumstances. My support network has been so incredible in coming into see me, calling and checking up on me. I may not have had to use them as much as I thought I would, but it's so reassuring to know so many people are there for me when I do need them. My eye has shown some seriously significant improvements since Friday, which is helping to confirm the fact that maybe this stuff is doing something. This morning I woke up and regained the ability overnight to look up and down with my left eye and I'm just waiting for the morning I wake up and my eyesight is back to normal with both eyes! I'm also just about back to normal with my ability to chew which has opened up the food options for me.

On the other side, I have the daily thought of 'why me? Why does this have to happen to me right now?' Unfortunately, this thought is only human nature and one I have to allow to enter and flow by. Nobody is 100% positive and by allowing this thought to come and go, it strangely makes the situation easier to accept. I'm at a stage where I'm really starting to miss the simple things in life. Little things like sleeping in a completely dark room with no noise, having a shower with a consistent temperature and being able to make up my own food decisions on a daily basis. There's so many other things however it's these three things I'm most looking forward to when I go home!

Last Friday morning was pretty tough for me as well. Adam, my roommate opposite me (not to be confused with Dr. Adam) got the all clear to go home. We'd spent roughly fifteen days together and had developed quite a bond and friendship. Adam had lymphoma, similar to me and was a couple of days ahead of me with his chemo treatment. To have somebody there to talk to, bounce ideas off and ask questions on what to expect is exactly what I needed over the most difficult times I had in here. It made early morning blood tests during breakfast and late nights after both of our families left that whole lot easier. Not having that somebody here anymore has made the past few days a little harder but nothing I won't get through. I know he'll read this to kill time at home so I hope you don't mind me writing this, Adam!

Adam actually sent me a photo a few days after he left with him and his son both smiling and that gave me strength and hope that I'd eventually get out of here and be in the same position! I honestly can't wait for that day! In all seriousness, a big thank you needs to go to this man for keeping me sane in the time we spent together. Whilst a brief fifteen days, we're in this journey together and we will both get through it.

I honestly don't have much planned for the week ahead so I can't guarantee when my next blog post will be. I'm expecting the results of a test that was sent off last Monday sometime this week. This should definitively tell me what type of lymphoma I have. My fingers and toes are crossed it's not Burkitt's as this will change my treatment program for the remaining cycles. I'm not holding my breath these will come through early in the week - I'm more banking on answers before Friday. I'm really looking forward to resting over the next two days before we get into the serious back-half of my 16 day treatment.

That's it from me tonight. I'm off to watch Day four of The Ashes and no doubt will be asleep before midnight! Enjoy your week and cherish moments spent with friends and family. You don't know when they'll be your last.

Much love,

Juzz xx

[manunkinda]

So, I wrote the first chapter for a RK1K (Markus x Connor) fic. I’m not happy with it at all, but oh well. To be fair, it is my first DBH fic and I tend to have some troubles writing the first chapter for anything, It’s an AU. It’s called Dirty Blues.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/20101882/chapters/47616835

Chapter One: Smoke And Vinyls

Shit!”

Markus stepped down hard on the gas, his hands gripping the wheel until his knuckles turned white. He was late. His bandmates, mainly North, were going to be pissed at him being late to the venue. Hell, he was pissed at himself. He didn't care if he was speeding on the highway, he just needed to get to his goddamn location.

He knew that sirens were going to tail him. He pulled over with a frustrated groan. He rolled down his window, watching the officer approach from the side mirror.

"Sir?" Markus was suddenly confronted with soft, brown doe-eyes. "You're aware that you were going 62 in a 40 mile zone, right?"

"Uh, yes..." He replied, trying to be as patient as possible given the situation.

The officer pursed his lips, as if he was thinking about something. "Why were you in a rush?"

"Gig."

"May I check your trunk?"

The driver nodded, tapping his fingers against the wheel. He glanced at the mirror as the officer opened the trunk, discovering a guitar case. He opened the case and inspected it for a minute before closing the case. He then closed the trunk and walked back to Markus.

"Nice guitar. Sorry, the department have been pulling over cars with Red Ice stashed away."

"It's fine. I understand."

"So, where's this gig?" The officer asked, thumbs hooked in his belt.

"Magic Stick. It starts at eight-thirty. My band's a regular there."

"Ah, okay." The man unhooked his thumbs and pulled out a notepad and pen. "What's your name?"

"Markus Manfred." He told him.

"You're a lucky man, Markus. I'm deciding not to give you a ticket. However, if you speed again, ticket. Got it?"

Markus smiled slightly and watched as he wrote his name and license plate number on paper. "Got it."

"Great." He put the pad and pen away. "I might see your band at the Magic Stick tonight."

"You don't strike me as someone who enjoys rock music."

“I’m full of surprises,” the officer grinned. “See you there?”

Markus could feel his face heat up, and he nodded in return. “Yeah, see you there.”

The nameless officer got back into his police cruiser and Markus started his car, integrating with the others on the highway.

The hard case felt heavy in his hands as he entered the venue. His bandmates were already setting up.

Simon lifted his head up from tuning his guitar, spotting his friend. "Guys, Markus is here."

North rushed out from backstage, holding her bass. “Where the fuck have you been?!" She demanded loudly, clearly angry.

"Cool down, I was pulled over on the highway. No big deal. I'm sorry." Markus countered, walking towards the stage.

"No big deal?" She looked at Simon and Josh, who seemed to be neutral. They knew that not agreeing with North would make this even messier, but Markus had a point.

"Yeah, seriously. Calm down, save the energy for the show." He got onto the platform and went backstage to take his guitar out. As he stepped back onto the stage with his instrument, North threatened to hit him with her bass guitar.

After doing the sound check, the band waited backstage and had a couple of drinks. Markus eyed the clock.

Eight-thirty.

It was time.

Markus found himself in the light in front of the mic, his friends also on stage. He was previously nervous, but all his fright had disinagrated away. "For the returning folks, welcome back. For first-timers, we're Jericho." He glanced at his bandmates to see if they were ready. "Josh, hit it."

The familiar harsh kick of the drums invaded his ears, and the rest of the band joined in, including him. North's bass could be felt from the speakers, and Simon's lead work added little intricacies. His voice was introduced to the wall of sound as they all played their part, yet remained in synch.

Pause.

And the sound shattered silence once again.

The show had ended and people were leaving. Markus was chatting with his friends, discussing tonight and joking around as they got ready to leave. While Carl was doing okay, he wished he was here, and he knew that Carl wanted to come; but he would be able to tell him all about tonight when he got home. He turned when he heard his name.

It was the officer from earlier. He almost didn't recognize him out of uniform.

"Oh hey," he smiled. He didn’t see him in the small crowd, but he suspected that he must’ve been hanging out in the back of the room. "Like the performance?"

The man ran his fingers through his hair, beaming. "Yeah, it was fun. You guys did a good job."

"Who's this, Markus?" Josh asked. Simon and North were curious as well, trying to figure out who the hell this stranger, who seemed to know their lead singer, was.

"This is... Uh..." Markus snapped his fingers a couple times. "I don't think you've ever told me your name."

"Connor." The doe-eyed man responded, straightening his jacket.

"This is Connor. He's the officer who pulled me over for speeding today."

North glanced at Connor, then Markus, then Connor again. Her expression could only be described as mischievous, a playful smirk tugging on her lips. “You know, Markus... You did tell me that you were pulled over today, but you never told me the cop was cute.”

Markus bit the inside of his cheek and Connor cleared his throat quietly as his friends laughed.

“Anyway, it’s nice to meet you, Connor.” Josh said. “Glad you enjoyed the show.”

“Yeah, we gotta pack and get home. We all have work or class.” Simon added, wrapping up some cords that were in his hands. “Hope to see you around more though.”

"Markus, you should take Connor to our grub hub for dinner." North suggested.

Markus shrugged. "I mean, it's up to him. Do you want to go eat?"

Connor looked hesitant. "Uh, sure? I was thinking you could come over and we could order takeout instead."

"We can do that." Markus agreed, ignoring North's teasing look. "Just let me put my stuff away and then we can go."

Connor nodded and waited near the door. “I can text you the address.” He told Markus as the other man neared the entrance with his guitar case.

“Sounds good. I’ll just put this in the trunk. I'll see you guys later.” Markus told his friends. He gave Connor his number and went to his car, putting away his things. His phone dinged, and he glanced at the screen to see an address.

Markus parked in the driveway of the small, one-floor home. He stopped the vehicle and got out, closing the car door afterwards.

The yard was relatively clean, although it was desperate for a cut. The grass was not quite long, but was getting there. He figured that he was too busy with his job to mow his lawn.

The musician approached the door, climbing up the steps. He pressed the doorbell, and after a couple of seconds, the door opened to reveal Connor who invited him in.

The first thing that Markus noticed were the shelves of vinyls, CDs, and cassettes that were on display in the living room.

Damn.

The second thing he noticed was that there were no pictures of Connor’s family as far as he could tell. The atmosphere of this home was a whole different vibe compared to the large, colorful mansion that he and Carl lived in.

“So, any ideas?”

Markus was forced out of observation. “I’m sorry, what?”

“Takeout.” Connor repeated. “Any ideas?”

“Uh, not sure. Just pick whatever.”

The host nodded and took out his phone. “Thai then?”

“Sure. Vegetable Pad Thai please.”

Markus’ mismatched eyes travelled to Connor’s left arm as Connor dialed a number and turned away, his back facing him. Crimson roses, cerulean plumerias, and wicked thorns adorned his entire limb from the shoulder to his wrist.

He was in awe at the complexity of the ink.

Connor ended the call and turned back around. “You know, you can take off your jacket and make yourself comfortable.”

“Oh, okay. Thanks.” He quickly took off his jacket and hung it up on the coat hanger. “Your sleeve tattoo is beautiful, by the way.”

He swore he saw Connor blush. “Uh, thanks. It was just inspired by a family friend’s garden.” Connor slipped his phone back into his pocket. “The food should be here pretty soon. Want anything to drink? I’ve got beer in the fridge.”

“A beer’s fine.” He sat down on the sofa as Connor went into the kitchen, coming back out with two beer bottles, one in each hand. He handed one to Markus and sat down.

The food arrived, and the two men dug in, chatting as they ate. After finishing and cleaning up, Connor decided to put a record on. “You know Bambara?”

Markus leaned back on the sofa. “No, actually. Never heard of them.”

“It’s a good band to get stoned to.” Connor said, rather casually.

Everyone had vices, regardless of their lifestyle. Still, he hadn’t taken Connor for a smoker. Usually, Markus was able to read a person correctly, but Connor was an exception. He would be lying if he said that the man wasn’t intriguing. “You smoke weed?”

“A little.” He replied, guiding the needle to the vinyl and turning up the volume. “For anxiety. As long as it doesn’t interfere with work, I’ll be fine.”

Markus watched as Connor opened a drawer on one of the end tables and took out a small sandwich bag and lighter, sitting back down. The music was already playing.

Connor noticed Markus watching and looked at him, opening the bag. “Want a joint?” He asked the taller man.

Markus shook his head. He personally didn’t like to smoke, but he knew people who did. He wasn’t unfamiliar. “Nah, thanks though. I’ll just stick to beer.”

Connor nodded and rolled up a joint before lighting it.

Neon glowing in the night,

Red words: Red Tide,

Shining in your eyes.

Smoke twirled in the air, the smell of burning paper and pungent leaves invading the room.

A gunshot cracked,

And streaming blood fanned out around its kicking feet.

Dead eyes staring,

Dead eyes staring.

Two bottles multiplied into four, and then eight.

“No one really leaves,”

Jimmy says through a cloud of smoke.

”Where would he go anyway?”

The sun is up and the birds are pecking

Pecking at something lying in the dirt.

Markus was sitting on the floor, lying against the sofa as he listened. Connor was draped on the sofa on his back, his legs hanging over the arm of the furniture. His red eyes stared straight at the blank ceiling, like there was something up there, or perhaps a mural. He noticed the sparse speckles of small moles, or maybe they were freckles, that were scattered across Connor’s face, neck, and hands.

Let’s make something huge and full of rust,

Rebar ‘round my handsome bust.

Broken glass like jagged flowers,

Climbing up a twisting tower.

Markus lost track of the time, zoning out and drunker than he intended to be. How the hell was he going to get home? Carl was going to lecture him on being responsible; he just knew it. The coffee table was almost covered in bottles and Connor was tired.

The town kids smoke meth and drink

Behind the scrap metal heap.

The guesthouse lies hidden...

He would figure something out.

[realityisoverrated-fic]

Hi!! I just came here to tell you how thankful I'm for your Infinity Love series. I've never thought that I would like the Smoaking Billionaires ship as much as I do now. I lost count of how many times I read and reread some of the parts. I love everything, from their relationship to all the kids (I LO-VE Nate). May I ask for a prompt? Have one, or more than one, of the boys dealing with one, or more than one, of the girls periods pain and humour hormonal changes?

Thank you! I’m thrilled to hear that you love to reread this series. I appreciate you taking a chance on reading Smoaking Billionaires, I know it isn’t for everyone. I’m glad you love this family as much as I do. Nate is pretty irresistible.

I actually found a draft of something I started and never finished about Becca getting her first  period. I’ll include what I have, it might be little rough from lack of editing. You have inspired me to go back and finish it. I hope you enjoy.

On Becoming A Woman

When Felicity was pregnant with Bobby, she would lie awake at night with Oliver and Tommy to discuss their parenting fears. The conversations would frequently turn to puberty, sex, and teenaged rebellion. Felicity established a rule during one of their late-night sessions.

“If it has a penis, I’m out. The sex talk is all you,” she informed them as Oliver rubbed her feet. “Straight sex. Gay sex. You guys have it covered.”

“What if it doesn’t have a penis?” Tommy asked. “Do you get to have the sex talk?”

Felicity’s brow furrowed as she considered Tommy’s words. After a few moments, she shook her head, “No, I think all of us should. I think if we’re having a daughter, she should have her dads encouraging sex positivity.”Oliver stopped rubbing her feet, “You don’t want our son to have sex positivity from his mom.”

Felicity laughed, “Our son will be your son – I think sex positivity is hard wired into both of your y chromosomes.”

“I don’t know, that doesn’t feel like gender or parenting equality,” Tommy said seriously.

“I’m okay with having the sex talk with our son, if I don’t have to have the period talk with our daughter,” Oliver offered.

“Since when are you squeamish about periods?” Felicity pressed her toes into Oliver’s shoulders.

“I’m not squeamish.” He shrugged, “I wouldn’t know what to say. How would I demonstrate tampon use?”

“You don’t start with a tampon. You start with a pad,” Tommy said casually, returning his attention to the latest requests from their contractor.Oliver sat up, “How do you know that?”

“Thea,” Tommy said. “I was here, your mom was away on QC business. I figured it out.”

Felicity held her arms up, and Oliver helped her into a sitting position. “Do we need to get Thea therapy – I know it’s been more than a decade, but how much did you traumatize her?” she teased.

“I didn’t traumatize her,” Tommy said defensively. “I crowd sourced the information. I knew a lot of women, I asked for advice, I got a lot back. I used what I thought sounded like would work with Thea.”

Felicity leaned over and kissed his cheek, “You’re a good big brother.”

Oliver felt a little jealous listening to Tommy. He’d missed so much the five years he’d been away. In his absence his sister had gone from a little girl to a young woman, but he’d never given much thought to what that entailed. Tommy got to be there for Thea for a lot of the milestones that made her the woman she was today.

“How did Donna react when you got your period?” Tommy asked.

Felicity rolled her eyes, “She treated it like it was the most important thing in the world. I was absolutely mortified. I just wanted her to give me a pad and never mention it again, but she was – my mom. She bought me flowers, she took me for a blow out, and my first mani-pedi. After she took me out to eat at the Bellagio. She probably spent three days salary on our dinner.” She smiled softly, “She made me feel special.”

“That’s a nice story,” Oliver said quietly. “Did you do something with Thea?” he asked Tommy.

“First, our sister paid zero attention in her biology class,” Tommy said with exasperation. “She knew what a period was, but she didn’t understand the mechanics behind it. I had to explain all of that to her. I went out and bought her pads and a heating pad. I let her stay home from school. We watched movies and ate ice cream all day. I let her paint my toenails hot pink. She practiced eyeshadow techniques on me. We had a fun day.” Tommy laughed, “For a good six months, any time I asked her to do something, she’d tell me, in her most impressive Moira impersonation, Thomas, I’m a woman now. You can’t boss me around.”

Tommy’s story made Oliver smile. Thea had never been overly studious before the Gambit sank. He could imagine her paying just enough attention to pass whatever test they had in health class. He could also imagine Tommy, who always got straight A’s in science and could’ve been a doctor if he hadn’t let Malcolm psych him out of it, delivering a lesson on reproduction and menstruation while trying to keep them both from dying of embarrassment. The rest of it, he didn’t need to imagine because it was still typical Tommy and Thea behavior. Thea regularly painted Tommy’s toes when they watched movies together.

Oliver sat up on his knees and leaned over his husband. He kissed his cheek.

“You are a very good brother. Thank you for telling me that story.”

“You’re welcome,” Tommy kissed Oliver back.

Oliver sat back and grinned at Felicity, “That settles it. If it’s a girl, Tommy gets to have the period talk.”

Felicity laid back down and put her feet in Oliver’s lap. “Sounds like a plan to me.”

“Fine with me,” Tommy said. “When we’re old, we’ll see who our daughter puts in a home or keeps close to her side, you two or me.”

“Who are you kidding?” Felicity teased. “You would miss us way too much if we went to a home without you.”

Tommy didn’t answer, he just grinned, and went back to answering the contractor’s questions about their renovations.

It was almost eighteen years later when Oliver walked into his bathroom to find Becca on her knees rummaging through Felicity’s cabinet. “Can I help you find something?” he asked.Startled, Becca squeaked and jumped, hitting her head on the underside of the counter.

Oliver was instantly on his knees by her side, his hand searching for a bump on the top of her head, “Are you okay?”

Becca nodded, but her eyes were wet. Oliver looked into the cabinet to determine what she was looking for when he spotted what she’d been after. “Did you need a box of your mom’s pads?”

Becca’s cheeks flamed dark red. She nodded without making eye contact.Oliver reached into the cabinet and pulled out several boxes. He put back the boxes that said tampons and panty liners. He held out the box of sanitary napkins. Becca remained frozen at his side. He was almost one hundred percent certain that this was Becca’s first period. Felicity would’ve told them if their daughter had reached this milestone. Oliver sat down on the floor, his back to the cabinet, and lifted his arm.

Becca immediately crawled into his side, placed her head on his chest, and began to cry. “I don’t want to grow up.”

Oliver cradled Becca’s head and let her cry as he made soothing noises. When she stopped crying, he wrapped her in his arms and held her tight. “I’m sorry your mom isn’t here. I know she’d want to be here to share this with you. When she got her period, your Grandma Donna made a big day of it. I know she’s going to want to tell you all about it herself and she’s going to want to make a big deal of this for you too.”

“Why?” Becca asked with a mixture of horror and embarrassment. “It’s gross and embarrassing.”

“It’s not gross and it shouldn’t be embarrassing. Your body is changing because you’re becoming a woman. You’re entering a new stage of life where you become something new and exciting, like a butterfly.”

Becca laughed and rubbed her sleeve beneath her nose, “Did you come up with the butterfly thing on your own or is that borrowed from a Grandma Donna story?”

Oliver laughed, “Give your dad a break. I’ve never been very good with words and I’m trying to tell you how much I love you and how excited I am that you’re becoming a woman. You’re growing up and you’re going to do great things. You’re going to go to school and find something that you’re passionate enough to study. You’re going to fall in love – probably more than a few times.  You might decide to get married, or not. You might decide to become a mom, or not, but everything is out there waiting for you.”

Becca smiled at him.

“How was that?” he asked nervously.

“Much better than the butterfly,” she grinned. “Boy did Bobby luck out. He didn’t have to get the butterfly – period talk.”

Oliver laughed and kissed the top of his daughter’s head. He wasn’t going to tell her that when Bobby started having wet dreams, he’d been subjected to the sex talk by both his dads. Her big brother would probably tell her he wished for the butterfly talk. “Bobby didn’t have the butterfly talk, but he did get the sex talk from your dad and me when he was around your age. Maybe it’s time we gave you the sex talk too.”

Becca’s eyes went wide with alarm, “I’m fourteen, daddy. I’m not having sex.”

“Glad to hear it, but the perfect time for you to hear the sex talk is when you’re not having sex and you’re still willing to listen to your dad and me.”

“You’re just going to tell me not to have sex,” Becca said with a roll of her eyes.

“Consider the sex talk had.”

“No, your dad and I would never tell you not to have sex. Under the right circumstances, sex is a lot of fun and feels fantastic. We just want you to have all the facts you need to be safe and make the best choices.” He handed her the box, “Go get changed. Put on something that isn’t sweats or jeans. Your dad and I are going to take you out to dinner to celebrate. Just the three of us.”

“Celebrate getting my period?” she asked standing up.

“We’re going to celebrate having you for a daughter, and I’m going to wager the new pair of ballet shoes you want that your dad is going to say something way stranger than my butterfly comment.”

Becca shook Oliver’s hand, “That’s a sucker’s bet. Da always says something way more embarrassing than you. It’s his superpower.”