#ngl this one i feel isn't that strong. sometimes you get those chapters

[vulpixisananimal]

"Can you see it from there!!"

(You were all taking a break from walking, it had been a very long day, but! With a bit of luck! You could sleep somewhere that wasn't in a tent! That's why Siffrin, wait, not Siffrin, was up in a tree, having climbed it before anyone even asked.)

"Patience, 'Bella" (Nille replied. She had been comparably fine with the travels.)

"O-oh, right."

(Oh Mirabelle, you should really be used to this by now. You had traveled for what, a whole year before this? You should be used to the long walks and dusty roads.)

(Mal Du Pays jumped off the branch they were hanging from and hopped to the ground with a huff. It tapped its eyes with its fingers and nodded. "I saw it.")

"W-well, if that's the case then we should get going!" (You say, excited. Finally, a nice bed!)

"Hmmmmm, how far away is it though?" (Nille asks.)

(There's a delay before Mal replies, it sighs. It makes two fists and pulls them apart, then makes an x with its arms. "It's far, we should rest.")

"O-oh. . ." (You say, disapointed, b-but, that was ok! One more night out here would be fine!) "You'll be ok with that?"

(It looked at you, nodded, then walked off.)

"pleasant. . ." (Nille said sarcastically, then sighed.) "No, I shouldn't say that."

"I-it's fine, w-we'll get used to it." (You had to admit, Siffrins mental health situation was. . . Complicated. Their memory only got worse, and Mal wasn't exactly easy to work with. Although, it was a small miracle everyone knew sign language already. Either from House of Change classes, defender lessons, looking out for neighbors, or just by Being Odile.)

(You'll get used to it. You and Nille head back to where everyone was resting up to relay the news.)

(Boniface was looking for cool rocks, Odile had found a place to sit in the shade and read, and Ramos and Isabeau where chatting about something. Mal had already disappeared, probably into the woods to be alone.)

"We'll make it there tomorrow, it looks like!" (You say, finding a place to put down your pack.) "S-sorry."

"No need to apolagize, Mira!" (Isabeau says, cheerfuly.) "There's no problem with one more night in the woods!"

"Bugs, Isa, that's the problem." (Ramos replies, crossing their arms) "It's bugs."

(Isabeau grinned.) "What, is it bugging y-"

"BAD!"

"HAHA!!"

(You giggle. Ramos was. . . Interesting. Still not sure what to make of them. No time to worry about that now, though. Time to get ready for a long night. Oh and you were REALLY looking forward to a nice bed too.)

(You perk your head up. What was that?)

"You ok, 'Bell?" (Bonnie asks, they had a pile of rocks in their arms.)

"Huh?" (You turn to them.) "O-oh! Yes just, did you hear anything just now?

"Wha?" (Bonnie squinted at you.) "Bird? You mean the birds?"

"N-no! Like, someone? I think?"

"Nuh uh." (They shook their head.) "It wasn't those two?" (Bonnie gestured to Ramos and Isabeau.)

"N-no! It wasn't them either!"

"Hehe, was it an imaginary friend?"

"No!!!" (You huff. Bonnie finally relents, going to help Nille set up a fire pit for dinner. You go back to setting up your own tent.)

(. . . There it was again. You ignore it.)

(. . .)

(Aaaaaand again?)

(. . . . . . . . . .)

(Ok that's it. You stand up, and start walking to the woods.) "I-I'll be right back!"

"Don't get lost!" (Isa calls back.)

(R-right. . .)

(You couldn't quite place that sound. It sounded like. . . A cry for help, a wail, and someone saying hello all at once. It was weird. You carefuly walked through the wood, trying not to get your dress caught on branches and such.)

(It was getting so dark, the canopy above you got thicker and thicker, blotting out the evening sky. It was amazing, honestly, seeing how the world itself was changed by nothing but trees.)

(The sounds got louder.)

"Hellloooooo?" (You call out. No response.)

(Could someone be in trouble? Or hurt??? Maybe they've been trapped in these woods for weeks! O-or, or maybe it was that stranger again! What was it's name. . ?)

(You walk a little bit more, stopping at a tree for a moment. What a thick forest. You're so glad there was a road, it would be so much slower trying to go through this thicket. Maybe if you stay here for a minute you can find-)

(What's that smell?)

(You sniff the air, there was a weird smell. Wait, was it mint??? No, no it wasn't mint, it was so overwhelming all of a sudden! Why so fast!! It's-)

(Your heart skips a beat. You look up.)

(Sugar!)

(You jump away from the sadness as it crashes down on where you were standing. You draw your sword, thank Change you didn't leave it behind!! Oh no, what do you do!! C-c'mon Mirabelle!! You've fought a lot of sadness' before!! J-just, just take a second and. . .)

"HELP!!! SADNESS!!!" (You yell. Please hurry, friends!!)

(The sadness looks at you, as if it's staring into your soul, before screaming.)

(You wince at the sound, but grip your sword! You strike, yelling as you lash out at the sadness with your weapon. The strike leaves a gash, but nothing more.)

(The sadness tilts its head at you, and screams again, bringing a claw down on you. You block it with your sword.)

"A-ANYONE!!!!"

(You hear someone reply, but it was too far away. Just, j-just a little bit more, Mira! You throw up a hand! Artsy Silent Burst!!!)

(It glances off the sadness, barely doing anything.)

(The sadness growls angrilly, before clapping its hands together and screaming. You wince again, what the Change was that?!? You ready yourself again and-)

(Just then, a blur of white sprints past you, it was Mal!! It brandished its dagger and sliced and stabbed at the sadness again and again and again!!)

(Only for each blow to be deflected. Mal du Pays jumped back, for the first time you see it shocked.)

"I-It. . . It didn't do anything?!?" (You craft your spell to make your friend stronger!) "Is anyone else-"

"HERE!! I'M HERE!!!" (Running past you before you could stop them, Ramos dashed at the Sadness with their tonfas and struck out. This time it actually connected! it didn't do much but it connected!!)

"Careful!!" (You run up to Ramos.) "where's everyone else!!"

"Catching up!" (Ramos clenched and unclenched their hand.) "I hit it's weakness and still did blinding nothing."

"It's real strong, be careful!!"

(Mal was circling around the Sadness, it attacked with a fist and dagger, this time making contact with the sadness, it screamed.)

(It looked at Mal, it had hatred in it's eyes.)

(Mal Du Pays was frozen in time.)

"NO!!!!"

"W-WHAT THE?!?!?"

(Your heart dropped. No, no no no no. That's, that's not possible!! You beat the king!! You unfroze the country! You fixed everything!! But you never learned how to unfreeze people!!! You, you couldn't fix this!!!)

"That's, that's, that's-" (Ramos looked petrified seeing Mals frozen stare. R-right, they where probably frozen too back before you beat the King.)

(Wait!! You did have something!! You clap your hands.) "T-this'll stop you being frozen, b-but. . ."

". . ." (Ramos looked between you and the sadness, that confidence they came into the battle with quickly fading.) "I-I, I might have an idea."

"Is it a good one?"

"N-no way, but. Oh crab it!!" (Ramos gritted their teeth and charged forward, with a yell they struck the sadness on the head with their rock/scissors sign.)

(There's a moment where both stop. You smell a little bit of mint- mind craft?!?)

(Ramos had refrained from developing their mind craft, the most they ever did was Odile asking to see some of it. They knew it left a bad taste in Siffrin's mouth, so. . .)

"OW OW OW OW OW OW-" (Ramos collapses back, clutching their head, as the sadness wails clutching it's own head in turn.)

"MIRABELLE!! RAMOS!!" (That was Isabeau! You turn, he, Nille, Bonnie, and a bit further behind, Odile, where running up to join in. Isa gasped seeing Mal.) "WH- WHAT HAPPENED?!?!?"

W-woah!!" (Nille brandished her hammer, standing between you and the sadness.)

"GET OUTTA HERE!! STUPID!! GRABBING SADNESS!!!" (Bonnie stood next to their sister, yelling all kind of things at the strong sadness.)

"C-careful!! It froze Mal in time!!" (You yell, getting up.) "I-if we beat it then maybe we'll, w-we-"

(The sadness. . . Ran away?)

"Uh. . ."

"What???"

"Gems. . ."

"YEAH!!! KEEP RUNNING!!!"

(You breathe in, and out.)

(Mirabelle is now level 47. . . And learned the skill "Lovely Moving Cure!")

(Ramos is now level 21.)

(You feel dizzy, and sick, Oh Change what just happened!?!? Y-you, Change, oh you- YOU NEED TO UNFREEZE MAL!!!)

"M-mira!!" (Isabeau was already by your frozen friend as you got over there.) "C-can you, fix? It?"

"I-I, I think I can! If, if I just, do this. . ." (You take a breath, and hold out your hands. Please unfreeze please unfreeze please unfreeze. . .)

(Your friend gasps and collapses to their knees, they're coughing and shaking.)

"Oh thank Change that worked!!" (You kneel down next to them, Isabeau joining you.) "A-are you alright?!? Do you need a heal?!??"

"W-where. . ." (They shook their head. Not Mal?) "Uh, what, where, am I? What. . ."

"Easy, easy. Who's around right now?" (Isabeau asked softly.)

(They look up at you, then at Isabeau, then back at the ground.) "Uh, Siffrin, i-it's just me, what, uh. . ."

"I-I, I got attacked by a sadness a-and, and screamed for help and Mal came from nowhere to help but, b-but got frozen in time and I was, I-If, if you. . ." (You're hyperventilating. If you, if you hadn't figured out how to unfreeze them, then, then, t-then--)

"Relax, 'Bella." (Nille came over and knelt down next to you.) "Take a breath, you saved the day again, held your own too against that thing!"

"I-I, I guess so. . ." (You breathe in, and out. Just like Sif does. You were already calming down.)

"What was that sadness?" (Odile sat down by a tree, clearly winded from running here.) "It looked similar to sadness near the house of change, rather than. . ."

(Ramos looked away.)

"Maaaaybe it's lost?" (Said Sif, he leaned back onto Isabeau.) "Or it's a fan."

"Some fanclub." (Isabeau sighed, gently patting Siffrins head.) "It's still around though, isn't it?"

"It smelled really bad." (Bonnie adds.) "Stinking of sugar, toooo much sugar."

"You? Saying it's too much sugar?" (Nille jokes.) "Can't be possible."

"HEY!!!"

(You all laugh. Even if it was scary, you all get a chance to laugh. What a great family you have.)

". . . I, hate to be the one to say it," (Odile stands up.) "We cannot sleep here tonight."

"Good point."

"Agreed."

"I-if we hurry, we should make it before it gets dark."

"Fingers crossed. . ."

(It was going to be a long walk.)

[blasphemecel]

ngl still being a kaiser fan after 261 is lame

Omg this ask got me so tight when I got to it I had to hop on mylaptop to type my essay

Ok this is a little Personal and some of yall aren gonna fuck with me after this but it's ok . Kaiser is a character I identify with because he's a good portrayal of someone with NPD so WE WILL GET INTO IT!

So like that being said. What do you mean 'Still liking Kaiser after the leaks is lame' like genuinely what do you mean. I just woke up but are you guys like SURPRISED by this. I liked him when he was introduced and this is what he was acting like. There have been A HUNDRED more chapters of him acting the same way past introduction. And now he's still acting like it. I understand if you just hate him right off the bat that makes sense but this doesn't really. Even if you're one of those people who just liked him for the backstory reveal because you have a I Can Treat You Better hero complex re:abuse victims that behavior WAS shown EVEN IN 260. "I hit the ball but it doesn't hit back" - the author has a very specific way of writing and this was VERY much intentional

Also like I understand there might be an initial shock when reading such words. Like it's Unpleasant it's Ugly. But also it boils down to a State of mind which personally I've observed as common among victims of severe trauma. "These people are born 'humans'. Different from me, they were born 'wanted humans'." = I hate people who weren't hurt the same way I was because I am jealous and bitter, I'm so jealous and bitter it feels good to me to make others feel like shit. And I'm not trying to get on some Hurt People Hurt People bullshit because that shit is annoying and apologia but what I'm trying to say is that sometimes Trauma makes you unpleasant and ugly and erratic and I appreciate that Kaneshiro actually wrote it out. Also like that feeling by itself isn't inherently evil. I think it's a very natural response! In this case Kaiser goes too far not by experiencing this emotion but by acting on it.

So now with THAT out of the way too, I think we need to sit down and think more into the Ness situation. So first he says, "I can't accept kindness because all I know is malice. If anything I think malice makes life easier." Then he goes to say he is specifically looking for someone to make a "dog to his malice" and reads a psychology book to achieve that. Like first of all I'm sorry but that is so comically evil it's hilarious to me. He read a textbook to be a more efficient male manipulator. But anyway the way I understand that isn't a deep underlying evil within him but a need for control. I think he believes everyone will hurt and disorient him unless he feels like he's Controlling them. From an abusive household the only relationship dynamic he knows is person of authority - inferior party. His only friend is Ness and the only person he feels safe around being Ness is because of he tells himself Ness is his "dog" and therefore won't ever raise a hand to him. And that's because he thinks anyone who isn't his dog/under his control will do exactly that.

And so... If we go from there, from the parallel we understand Kaiser didn't see his meeting with Ness the same way Ness sees it. However, that doesn't mean Kaiser's view is the objective truth. I think they're both UNRELIABLE and EMOTIONALLY UNSTABLE. So what that means is that Ness sees his time together with Kaiser through a more glorified lens, while Kaiser denies himself thinking of Ness as a companion because that puts him in a vulnerable spot, so to maintain his feeling of being in control he exerts distance and tells himself Heh we aren't actually friends because he doesn't even know that one time I giggled at him in the showers I was actually just manipulating him all along because I am sooo evil and untouchable 😏. Like do we actually take this perception at face value here because to me it just seems like a Scared and Cowardly person trying to act out his idea of a strong person because the ONLY other time he's been in any meaningful proximity to someone he got beat up and degraded.

With that I also think Kaiser is very much narcissist posturing. He'slying to himself to make himself seem invulnerable and self-aggrandizing himself through his malice (I think pretending we are 100% evil and irredeemable makes a lot of us feel safe because it seems inhuman and people are easily hurt so you don't Ever want to be a multidimensional person with layered personality traits). Because like if you think about it without the emotional reaction of "I hope Ness kills you you stupid whore" that we all have... He actually isn't doing anything that big. Like in his head he's like Heh I'm soooo Patrick Bateman I have all the control 😏 but all he did was like find a guy to play football with.

Like he's trying to say to himself that he's all that. Sure he does insult Ness and that's not good! But he didn't pull off some Complicated deeply horrific scheme. I do not believe Kaiser has an objective view of himself. It really takes away the power from all of that when you realize what he's doing is just Very Pathetic and Paranoid and Intimacy Averse. "I can't have normal friends let me get this guy in on my master servant roleplay and I'll act like he's not enjoying it too because it'll make me feel more powerful" Men will do anything but go to counseling

Addendum: This is also not Kaiser. Now I don't know what kind of person Kaiser is but considering I read it as him suffering from NPD/a disordered personality that means he doesn't have a "real" identity most of the time, this is a shell we're seeing. He just has a mask maybe there's something underneath maybe there isn't and he's empty inside, but the point is he is the kind of character who has a specific way they want to portray themselves and will lie to both themselves and the audience to achieve it. Yes I believe that includes the I'm a male manipulator evilest person alive 😏 shtick too (I think the actual truth is probably somewhere in the middle of his and Ness's view. Most likely they're both incorrect).

Notice how Barou and Rin overcame things? That is because they have a real ego. Kaiser doesn't have a "real ego"/sense of self right now, all he has is his selfish act. I believe that is intentional because I think the Blue Lock mangaka shows a good grasp and understanding of psychology. The development is pointing towards him actually getting one during this match we'll see. Hey he might even change and grow as a person if that happens but I wouldn't get too overly optimistic!

Also we need to understand that we only see these people playing football we don't know what the fuck he's like outside of that. I currently don't have any reason to believe he's anything beyond rude and insufferable when like talking to people who aren't his football rivals and in Blue Lock on principle I believe everyone is at least 30% a better more bearable person off the field.

And to finish off my demented rant some of yall are fucking HYPOCRITICAL. So when Isagi takes joy in ruining people's dreams it's fine but when Kaiser does it he needs to kill himself? Let's be very serious.

TL;DR Kaiser's behavior makes total sense, his 261 characterization falls in line with everything we've seen of him before so there's no need for shock, and he looked good being dysfunctional and messed up too

[biffhofosho]

I sent an ask before my ramblings over chapter 10, but I think tumblr ate it, so I'll write again a few things I wanted to tell you, like in general.

The expression in Spanish is "meterse en la boca del lobo" and it means to go in into the wolf's mouth, to put yourself on purpose directly into unnecessary danger and boy does Ambrosia like to do that.

A d funny you mention you used to be an English teacher, I guess I can see that in your writing, as a linguist I absolutely adore words. It fascinates me how something as simple as combining them into sentences serves as a way to convey a feeling so accurately that you have no option but to feel it in your stomach. funny enough that's what I find in your writing, it's in the phrases you use,your choice of words... they just give me the thrills, they just resonate so deeply in me, so thanks for that!

I am also a multi Stan, I even have bias in groups that I really don't listen to. Lol, however I love my monstas the most and only them I would allow to pass me around like ragdoll.

Wonho's description in chapter 11 was enough to make me wanna desperately read his part on the story...

What you finish the story I'd love to hear more about it. Like behind the scenes or what inspired you to write it, more on the lore or whatever you wanna share with us.

Anyways hope you get this ask and I'll write soon another message about 5he recent chapter.

Have a lovely night/day

I've heard tumblr can eat asks! >:( Thanks for sending again! I enjoy our discourse. ;)

Wow, the Spanish phrase is really lovely, isn't it? Rolls off the tongue beautifully.

Wait, you're a linguist? As a profession or by hobby? I took a couple linguistics classes in college--I had a dual major in English and German. I LOVE language. Can't get enough of them. I also took Japanese, sign language, and Irish Gaelic (of all things--not that I can speak any of that anymore).

Um, that's some pretty high praise of my writing, so thank you! o.O Word choice is very important to me. Sometimes I labor over a single word for hours because I know the right word is out there, and I just can't grab it. My bestie, who's a bit of a thesaurus, knows she's on call 24/7 to help on just such occasions. ;)

I'll listen to basically any group. My mp3 player (because, yes, I'm old school and like my music on one device) is absolutely stuffed with random groups, but only a few over the years have wowed me with their chemistry, and none so much as MX. I'm too old to enjoy boy groups anymore outside of a good bop, so I only get attached to those that I find with real maturity and masculinity. Monsta X is nothing but men--strong, confident, fearsome men--so, yeah, ragdoll it is. :) Right there with ya, babe.

Ngl, I was pretty proud of how Wonho's description came out. It felt very him, but also ngl, that's the way I feel about how his chapter came out. I really feel like the muse has lived it. Lucky bitch. It's coming in just a couple more chapters, sorry!

LOL, wow, I never expected for anyone to care about the behind-the-scenes except my best friend, for whom I wrote it. :) I'd be happy to share some deets in the future.

I hope to have the next chapter up tonight, but I have some custom content to craft for it that may derail that plan. If not tonight, tomorrow then! Have a great night, too!