#next to everyone is a disaster in this
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Mathieu van der Poel in Glentress, Scotland, during the 2023 UCI World Championships
#i mean yeah obviously it sucks that he crashed during the mtb xc race#but uhhh the little cheek+chin grazes are extremely hot#mathieu van der poel#merry christmas everyone!#really hope he doesn't have as many high profile mtb disasters next year 🙏#hopefully those ramps will be clearly marked in paris
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thinking about black sails and "everyone needs a partner", and how throughout the show the only one without a consistent long term partner is billy
#black sails#billy bones#there's gates in s1 (who then is murdered)#and then billy spends the next three seasons trying to find a partner and always losing#he loses silver to flint#he loses ben and the others to silver#even signing up with woodes rogers ends in disaster#and at the end he's all alone again#if flint's story in 208 was true#then billy spends all that time looking for a (somewhat) stable family dynamic to replace the one he lost as a child#only to be disappointed at every turn bc everyone he chooses is way more fucked up than him#it just makes me sad okay
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Tagged by @soyouwinagain to post 6 photos from my camera roll in the past week, thank you comrade, I was hoping someone would tag me 🫡🫡 except then I had to go back a couple weeks otherwise all six photos would have been my dog at a cocktail garden.
Ivan Fedotov and Erik Johnson at Flyers training camp, Fedotov in full Russian saint mode; a flower outside of an Indian restaurant; Yankees outfielders running away from each other and I'm so mad I only got them running back to position bc they were being SO cute while a reliever was warming up; Keats at the aforementioned cocktail garden, he was sweatin'; giant rotting boat outside of Ikea; boxes containing all of my earthly possessions.
#having a good day 😭 went to rittenhouse to hang with sierra while they did work then went to a flyers rally and got free stuff#heroically refrained from asking flyers reporters about danny briere's plan for eetu mäkiniemi during the q&a#took the bus all by myself!!!! an actualy achievement lol i'm so scared of buses and i was so worried i would end up in like delaware#but i did not i ended up at my house#so now i feel much more confident about taking the bus..exposure therapy LMAO#went to a pizza place near me i have not been too and it FUCKS#my new favorite thing to do rn is if i can eat anything on the menu and its super slow in the restaurant is to ask#what the cashier or server recommends. way better than if i were just panicking and ordered cheese pizza#i need to start unpacking my art supplies and bathe my dog but overall...VERY good day so far#if the padres and the phillies pull through we'll be in good shape#OH!!!! AND EVERYONE BEING SO SO BRAVE FOR TEAM LIFT FEST!!!#ME N MAX ARE SOOOO PROUD OF EVERYONE AND I'M SOOOO EXCITED TO SEE WHAT THE NEXT TWO WEEKS BRINGS!!!!#i've been having some frustrations with myself bc there was a lot of stuff i should have scaled down and didn't#and my ethos running this w max is way different than fth but none of the sign up materials reflect that#which i'm frustrated with myself for not thinking through more carefully and conscientiously#even tho going into this we knew so much of the fest was going to be us throwing puddy at the wall and seeing what sticks#but i have been frustrated with myself for not thinking through how materials like the sign up form don't reflect the like spirit of how we#wanted to run it#so it's really nice to see that people are being really brave and getting excited for each other and getting excited for what's#being offered#i'm sooooo excited!!!!!!!!!#ok i'm done lol i have to finish this soda and face the disaster that is how i packed my art supplies#when i can do art again. know.#fresno oilers.txt
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also i love how when i mentioned the conference thing today one guy was like "so is pelin famous in turkey?" PLEASE WDYMMMM 😭😭
#im literally just a guy who has a bachelors degree and decided to do something way out of my league#and they actually let me do it. woaw#and i feel like i will be out of place 😵💫 and my only choice is doing it online truly i hope it wont be a disaster#i actually wish i had the chance to do it in person but also i would probably kill myself over it u know#also loooove how everyone was rlly interested in the topic and asked questions and stuff#hope they dont ask insane questions tomorrow tho like 😭😭 please im just a guy w a bachelor's degree idek what im doing here#like the next panel my LITERAL PROFESSOR with an academic career and a phd and everything else will be presenting#LIKE WHAT AM I DOING HERE HOW DID YALL LET ME INNNN 😭 i dont know anything 😭#🗒#anyway yeah . it's cool im okay. ysah
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haunted once more by a dumb character idea
#tma guy. anatomy student turned archives assistant (sent as the most unsubtle spy possible on nikolas orders. elias finds it all very--#--funny adn their constant misery in the eyes sanctum is a sweet boon) who slowly tears themself apart under such a restrictive existence#the best they can get while still having to have a Singular Identity for the time is subtle appearance changes (eyes colors--#--changing. minute tweaks to features. a new nail length / polish each day. the most drastic they can get Appearance wise is--#--hair bc wigs exist as an explanation for why theyre walking in the building w a buzzcut one day and braids the next) and lying constantly#--abt their life outside of the job (a constantly rotating cast of characters who Never have the same characteristics as the last time--#--they mentioned them. a husband a boyfriend two daughters a mother a cousin from out of town a brother who moved to america etc etc). at--#--one point (after sasha gets Not Them-ed ? lot of tension between the two strangers bc of the assistants non-interference stance--#--that had the not them stuck in the table just a bit longer) they have a complete breakdown in front of martin bc of the stress and--#--babble abt how every single member of their family expects too much and has left them for dead and how they want to go HOME#tim runs into them at the club one night while theyre playing the part of a COMPLETELY different person and it is a very strange--#--time. a stranger wearing a party city mask of your coworker#the tma timeline has faded a bit from my head but i like the idea of them somehow weaseling their way into survival even after the--#--not them is entombed by leitner. they signed the contract so they cannot abandon ship the circus has stopped responding to their--#--messages and elias makes a point to swing by and just Watch them regularly while the archives fights to not collapse in on itself#like the name jane for them. jane doe and Also a cute bit of name sharing w jane pretniss lol#a little less certain abt this but also like the idea that when the pressure is REALLY bad but b4 the not them disaster the assistant--#--would ask the rest of the archives staff to call them by a different name w no explanation just to be able to shake off the fetter of--#--a Set Name for a day. its a different name every time and the running theory w everyone is that it is either a trans thing or a very--#--convoluted joke. the second time they do this sasha ends up getting them a label maker + two of those 'HELLO MY NAME IS' name--#--tags. one for 'jane' and one for any different name they choose that day. a genuine + caring gesture that absolutely devastates the--#--assistant because now they are BRANDED with a name
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A friend and I discussed stuff and. Lotsa thoughts down here
#disney titans#i think the part that really fucks me up is just#how similar some of this was to my childhood. imagine having to do your schoolwork in a closet in the front administrative office.#because you were too much for the teachers. imagine knowing everyone around you thinks youre bad#and you don't know WHY they think it. but they think it so loud you start to think it too.#and the next thing you know that anger and pain is being turned against them like a sword and shield and it doesnt protect you.#it only makes everyone angrier. it reinforces their beliefs and you don't know how to make them see.#and the fact the titans are metaphors for natural disasters. they're inevitable. they're not evil or malicious. they simply represent thing#is it a crime to have a purpose? even if it's not pretty?#even if it hurts?#the olympians thought so. and now. they kind of think so too.
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I feel like the weight of the last week is finally hitting me and I maybe need to sleep for 48 hours but I just drank a ton of caffiene so I guess I'm gonna read instead.
#maybe next time I go thru a natural disaster bandaging my emotions with memes is not the way#the problem is that when people around me are panicking my natural response is to be calm#its not so much a 'mom friend' function as a 'someone's gotta lead and everyone else is falling apart so I guess its gotta be me' function#so anyway the last week I have been holding myself and my neighbors together and now its friday and I am alone and its all kinda hitting#im emotionally fine I'm just EXHAUSTED#and I'm trying not to focus on the 'what ifs' but i could have lost my house#i could have lost my car#i almost did#tbh I probably could have died last saturday in the chaos of the disaster#and everyone was panicking so much that I am only just now getting to process#ANYWAY HAHA#sorry to get personal#tags on my blog are my journal sorry#personal#prolly gonna delete this later after a hot nap#but I gotta burn off the caffiene first
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the astrology girlies were right things DID have a big change after the new moon. everything was really sucks before but now my one reserved book is available but i want to try and get more writing done while im still hyperfixated but i need to finish reading the first book before the second book i reserved becomes available (and i need to finish the last chapter of the second books prequel before THAT) and also my house is a disaster bc of aforementioned hyperfixation
#genuinely havent been hyperfixated in years this is insaaaane#like physically hyperfixated. sorry but i think everyone needs to stop throwing the word around so often#boy if youre not ignoring basic needs for 5+ hours at a time you're not hyperfixated. to me. its just an activity.#anyway ok i need to unfuck my house how embarrassing the kitchen is a disaster from ONE day of doing nothing#then writing bc its been really fun to just be able to write after sooo long + im definitely definitely gonna lose steam in like. two days#itll be so over for another three years but thats ok#THEN ILIAD TIMEEEEEE 🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊#ok i need to batch cook some fucking food so i dont starve the next few days christ alive
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i wish more people understood the concept of activism burnout and compassion fatigue. you do like genuinely have to pick your battles, and that usually means something local that you can make a real difference with. if you get overwhelmed with every problem nothing is going to change.
#i have friends in organizations similar to DWB and the like. and when there are disasters they are sent overseas to go help.#whereas my focus remains here because i cant handle more disaster relief tbh and thats. thats okay.#i still take part in programs for queer rights in local politics and providing aid to those without permanent residence#i get that like. its frustrating to hear people not talking ab whatever Your thing is#but they also have Their things#absolutely fucking no one on this website has ever spoken about the rising houseless and opioid problems in new hampshire. but i still help#headspace hotel is right. if you hear about every disaster and think you have a personal responsibility to do something for all of them.#youre going to lose hope so so so fast bc it feels like the world is unfixable#but its not. its just only fixed a little bit at a time. on a very individual level.#everyone talks ab activism and caring but theyd make more change by googling ''charities in my area''#unrebloggable for now bc im mostly just venting tbh#fortunately this is pretty much only an issue online so i know when i do my next thing itll feel like the world is okay again.#until then this is a worrying rise and im really worried that younger people will think activism is useless#or worse that if you see someone not talking ab a specific issue youll assume they dont care at all#when theres just nothing they can do.
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Me looking at one of my fave next gen uf dynamics: what if i made it fucked up
#abi speaks#the specific thing that spawned this post is. almost def not happening but like#the steady loss of everyone you've ever loved relying more and more on someone as everyone else dies around you#combined with grief and pain that you simply cannot afford to heal from in this disastrous world#and someone who can glamour themselves. who you trust and know deeply even if it's not like that#and just pretending for a few minutes that they're someone else entirely#uf next gen is jsut fucking traumatized af tbh but :) fun!#the funny thing when i say next gen at leastin this context is that it's really the next generation of a whole#not just warrens bc i've been slowly sketching out those family lines#and dont worry theyre all their own disasters too#(yes i am looking at my girl alicia marks and our fave lesbian noir p.i. robin montana)
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god im so done with this rigged shitshow
#they literally took on K I D S …AGAIN!#but now the kids haven’t even had the right experience or enough skill progression to really thrive in the idol industry#like I actually can’t believe they’d throw away an ace card like chanelle at the drop of a hat!#and sorry but the judges and their biased backsides can fuck off fr#THEYRE the reason this is happening#chanelle had more than enough votes from everyone but them iM SO MAD#and jihyun :((#my girls were two of the most well rounded and versatile participants on the show and they just OUTED them like they were nothing?#not to mention all the international clout they got just by featuring chanelle#I hate this so much I hate it here I’m so done#just watch r u next lose half of its fanbase now..gonna lose SOOO many viewers#people just ain’t gonna bother cause it’s honestly a shitshow ..like debuting a 15 year old with only a month of training? PLEASE#there have literally been people training for years on that show who are far better than [redacted]#debut line gonna be a disaster from the get go I’m afraid#i can’t even be happy that yuna yongseo jiwoo and minju got to the finals#god this sucks#r u next
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Little comic bit part 1!!
This takes place a week or so before the main plot of this story btw. Just for reference. So anything else I’ve posted? Keep in mind it’s wayyyy later. Also there are some hidden details here if you wanna look for them :3
Part 2
#my art#the next part should come in a few days btw#comic#Sunlight and Ashes#artwork#digital art#lineless art#lineless comic#oc#original story#Andi#Arin#also everyone look at my epic background skills#they’ve improved!#not perfect but a whole lot better#original characters#original comic#art#artists on tumblr#man I love these two disaster siblings#they’re relationship is super messy at this point fbemrndjhd#comic series#guys I’m so cool#a family visit
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idk what to do because normally being on tumblr and seeing everyone’s thoughts and memes eases the post eurovision depression but this year was so disappointing… i feel like it’ll just make me sad all over every time i think about it you know, even if we’re all commiserating it’ll just be a reminder
#eurovision#here’s to next year ig#sweden being insufferable about hosting even if it’s petra who i love#lots more bland pop songs because that wins apparently#everyone singing in english#what a disaster i don’t understand what happened#i know my taste isn’t the general eurovision public’s taste i was expecting to be disappointed but not THIS disappointed#there is nothing about the shows that i can remember fondly#i didn’t think the songs were that weak i really liked most of them#but the show was such a let down i was way happier about this year before the actual performances#eurovision season was good but eurovision itself not so much😔
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i had a couple tasks i was putting off for legit like a week that were very scary and loud and i got them done omgg
#im. so scared of literally nothing literally 5 minute ass tasks which not completing could severely alter the course of my next few months#it's soooo hard being so sexy and nd haha guess that just makes me better than everyone else (<- life is forever teetering on the brink of#disaster due to inability to perform tasks that are technically easy and doable for me but for some reason are Off Limits all the time)
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oh my god my family is so fucking toxic I can't wait to get back to my apartment
#ofc my mom and I fall back into our old pattern of me being her emotional support that she can't get from the rest of them#she's not going to get anything from my dad who watches tv#her weird immature daughter#or her mentally ill daughter#I'm the only one who can give her empathy and distract her#I love her but everyone's toxic#praying that christmas isn't a disaster#hell I told her next year we shouldn't even bother
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Too cute!
I used this to create a picture of a certain couple I've been thinking about a lot lately. Here we see Dimitrius enjoying Ceres' stubborn attempt at understanding the whole mortal romance thing.
Long time no see! I made another picrew for my friends, please enjoy :)
#picrew#How a Thief Stole the Devil's Heart#yes hello I present to you my bisexual disaster couple#been working on their story for a while#I hope to share it with everyone sometime in the next 30 years...
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