#nanaisbeingemohours'🪨 | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

3vergr3en · 2 months ago

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ᴺᴼᵂ ᴾᴸᴬᵞᴵᴺᴳ : Secret Love Song

You never thought you could handle the pressure of dating an idol.

You've read the stories. How celebrities lost their years-earned career because all they did was love a person. You knew about the crazy fans that could rain hell if things went sideways in the slightest. And it terrified you with the thought that your boyfriend could be at the receiving end.

You knew that dating Jaeyun was going to be a challenge.

You were to be a couple that couldn’t be seen in broad daylight. That couldn’t be seen sharing a romantic dinner. Or can't even hold eye contact for anything longer than 5 seconds. That’s how careful you guys had to be.

But he reassured you that everything would be fine. That he would love you regardless of what happens. And what did you do? You believed him. You trusted him.

Now, loving your boyfriend was as easy as breathing. It was something that you didn’t think you could ever feel. It was liberating. It.. it felt so right. Like every piece of him just fits perfectly. Cause you loved him. And you swore that you would love him till your dying day. You tell yourself that he feels the same because he promised. He has to feel the same… right?

"I love you." "Let's break up."

Oh.

Everything flew by like a blur, too fast to process what was happening.

He's leaving.

He's leaving you.

“Jake, wait!” You cry out, voice faltering as your hands grasp onto the hem of his sleeve, frantically grabbing up his arm to keep him from walking any further. You held onto him as much as you could, because you feared that if you let him go, he would walk right out that door and never look back. And what’s scary is that he might really do that.

“Don’t do this, y/n.” He mumbled.

His voice… When did it turn so cold? What happened? Why wasn’t there any trace of love behind his voice? Where did the soft-spoken voice that you loved so dearly go? The voice that could pull you out of the darkest days. He spoke to you like you were a stranger. Like you meant nothing to him. And in that moment, you swear you can hear your heart cracking.

He couldn’t even look at you. Why can’t he? It’s the least he could do for you right now.

“What?” you utter in pure disbelief. You were borderline baffled at what he had just said.

“No, you’re the one who’s doing this!" You emphasize by jabbing your finger into his chest.

And another tug at his sleeve finally makes him look back at you.

You hoped for tears in his eyes. A pained look on his face. Or just anything to show an ounce of that he really cared.

But all you saw was a blank stare.

You felt your heart sink, and right then, you realized he no longer cared.

It was over.

You let him go.

You could only watch him as he opened the door of your shared apartment and walked out. He walked out sparing no words. No goodbyes. Nothing. He left as if he was never there.

You watched as his figure grew distant until he was out of your peripheral view. You remembered the memories, the moments, the joy that you shared. You remembered the feeling of love that you had for him. You remembered it all, and it hurt. So bad. Heavy sobs wreaked havoc on your body as you felt the emptiness that his absence left.

His POV:

I can’t keep hearing her voice call my name out like that. I can’t be here for another minute. I can’t.

‘You’re a fucking coward’ I know. ‘You didn’t keep your promise’ You don’t think I know that? All of the guilt I’m feeling… it’s gnawing at me. ‘How could you hurt the only woman you’ve ever truly loved?’ Stop. Don’t do this... ‘She doesn’t deserve this’ I said–

“Don’t do this, y/n.”

Wait, no, I didn't mean that– I–

He doesn’t need to look at you to know what you're feeling. God. He knows you like the back of his hand. He can just feel your heart breaking. And it was because of him. The one person you let into your heart, who you deeply trusted with everything and anything, and he was the reason why you were currently falling apart in front of him.

He’s fighting everything that is screaming at him to go and embrace you in his arms. To apologize for what he’s doing to you. To tell you that this is not your fault. To tell you that.. he loves you too. He always has. Words can't accumulate how much he loves you. He needs you like the air he breathes-- god, he needs you more than he needs himself, he needs you more than anything. And he wants to tell you,

But he can’t.

And it's agonizing.

He’d rather have all of his fans hate him. Sending him hateful messages, and so many demeaning words because he knows that it could never add up to the pain he's giving you.

He wants to be selfish. He wants to love you in broad daylight. To take you out for romantic dinners in public. To hold you and kiss you for more than 5 seconds. But he simply can’t.

He looks back at you and wishes he didn’t because it made everything so much harder. He takes in the sight before him. Your eyes were bloodshot and puffy with tears pouring out, causing your mascara to stain your reddened cheeks. Your hair was disheveled and frizzy in contrast to your normal hair which was soft whenever he played with it. You looked so tired. So.. out of it. And he wants to beat himself up for making you feel like that. This sight of you was his greatest fear. It was enough for his chest to churn, feeling like his own heart was about to implode.

But he somehow managed to keep a stone, cold face.

But right then, for a split second, he ignored what everyone said and his hand twitched just a little bit enough for him to almost reach out and hold your hand and–

You let go.

No. Why did you let go?

Wait. But isn’t this what he wanted?

Why is he hesitating?

Is this truly what he wanted?

But he can’t think for himself. Not when he’s held accountable for his other members, and for his own sake and future.

So he does the unforgivable and walks past you. Bidding no goodbyes. Not even a last look behind his shoulder. Just nothing. He left as if he was never there.

#nanaisbeingemohours'🪨#jake sim #enhypen jake #angst with a sad ending #angst #enhypen angst #jaeyun x reader #sim jaeyun #jake enhypen #enhypen imagines #enhypen x reader #enhypen scenarios #enhypen #enhypen jake sim #should i make a part 2?

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