#my solution to kaeya's desire for family is just to give him a better sibling
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gold-rhine · 1 year ago
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In an ideal universe where your wish fulfillment came true... any particular characters (including npcs) you'd like Kaeya to interact with when he gets there?
by wish fulfillment i assume you mean "kaeya moves to sumeru". to proper answer, i need to explain my pet crack theory which is Kaeya and Candace are related. buckle up babes
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ok, so, we know chlothar is one of kaeya's ancestors. look at this pasty ugly dude. he did NOT produce the hottest man in the game by in-breeding with other pasty khaenriah nobles from same bloodlines. and we know it had to be same bloodline or kid gets hilichurled.
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where are kaeya's hot genetics are coming from??? the darker skin?? blue eyes, dark blue hair?? like they could've at least give him the same brown skin tone to match, but no. and genshin matches relatives OBSESSIVELY. hot genetics HAVE to come from somewhere.
sumeru is near khaenriah. deshret's civilization is connected to khaenriah in canon, we know for a fact some of the survivors became part of khaenriah. deshret's civilization was also highly advanced AND fucked with the abyss. it's all not crack, thats just stating canon facts. so like it doesn't seem to me as a stretch to guess that the khaenriah's noble bloodline originated from Deshret. like, a lot of ppl connected to the desert have rhombs in their pupils, which we know is the main visible sign of this bloodline. like, thats not precisely khaenriah diamonds, but its fucking close, ok?
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and Candace is canonically a direct descendent of Deshret himself. Brown skin - check, blue eye color - check, dark midnight blue hair - check, hotness - hell yeah check.
if you catch my drift, i think khaenriah's main noble bloodline, the one that is not hilichurled, hailed from deshret. their only choice to get a normal, non-cursed kid was to find the descendants of the same bloodline who did not leave desert for khaenriah and so were not cursed, and it's Candace's family. booom babyy
so in ideal world, Candace and Kaeya realize they're distant cousins bc she's like Alberich? My aunt married some shady dude named Alberich, was that your dad? like all kaeya always wanted was to belong, and here he finally will have family that is not trying to use him OR repressed anger issue catholics. and nahida let even scara to redeem after he tried to murder her. kaeya could finally come clean and just live as himself.
and he would be so needed too, like the desert ppl are in turmoil process of integrating with sumeru, criminals are overrunning aaru village. and who keeps treasure hoarders in mond in check with nothing but three dumb sergeants and a smile? kaeya would sort that shit out in a month. seriously, i had to go to liyue to farm treasure hoarders, there are no roaming mobs of them in mond. kaeya would also be the best liason to akademiya, growing up with nobility and being used to political games as mond's spymaster.
after this premise, there is literally not a single character in sumeru it would not be fun to see kaeya interacting with. he and dehya are immediately besties, they met on a shopping trip where candace was helping him choose his new skin outfit, and this same evening drunk dehya is princess carrying him out of tavern. he can amplify cyno's horrible puns into a weapon of mass destruction and tighnari can't even hate him, bc he also made ppl stop eating poisonous mushrooms by spreading rumors that if you eat too much of them, their spores will grow inside of and mindcontrol you. its absolute bullshit, but it worked, goddamit. kaeya could solve kaveh and alhaitham's communication problems in one evening at a bar, but he wouldn't, bc he's a little shit and he thinks its entertaining to watch and he's curious how long its gonna take them by themselves, but he would give them trollish little nudges. also, in nilou's tropue he would finally have a proper bohemian scene to exercise his flair for dramatics and inspire several epic poems by being a heartbreaker.
tldr little desert village has neither rich nobility nor grand destiny he's supposed to fulfill, but it has ppl who will accept and appreciate him, and i think realizing that he doesn't have to choose between a coinflip of bad and awful and learning to live for himself instead is one of kaeya's arcs best possible resolutions
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