#my sleep paralysis demon is a fish

[jangmi-latte]

what the fuck

[midnightskraptor]

I had no idea that this is what the recreation actually looks like because for the whole time I've been going off of this thing

i hope i never ever ever see this image while im high or it will also straight up kill me. it would make me so scared my skeleton would run away And id be a boneless scared heap on the ground

[doudouo]

Izana Kurokawa joining the fish eye angle trend

this is what my sleep paralysis demon looks like

[illustr-ace]

I gave up on this halfway through because backgrounds are my sleep paralysis demon, but I drew my fish husband

[stars-on-my-bedroom-ceiling]

masterlist of my moots and their tags!!

for some reason tumblr won't let me link the part 2, so check the reblogs if you want a real list

okay so i have a bunch of moots and not all of them have tags yet, so if you want to be added to the list, ask me please or just put an emoji you like and your preferred internet name in the replies and i will get to it :3

okay anyways

@lifegoalsofafish #fish 🐟

@mister-dirty-hands #crow 🖤

@i-live-life1313 #eli 💚

@bloophasarrived #mari 🐿

@liggy-not-potter #liggy 👹

@starcrossedmoony #peppa 🦕

@definitionoffuckup #star 💫

@wistfulenchantress #witch 🎧

@good-oldfashioned-lover-girl #evie 💙

@margaret-the-duck #maggie 🦆

@totalcharliespringsimp #charlie 👁

@figuring-it-out-slowly #mars ⚘

@dandelionflowery #dandelion 🌿

@random-bi-kid #petra 💜 or #asher 💜

@ashippingpotato #potato 🥔

@gildy-locks #gildy 🐥

@anglptera #ang 🦖

@cazzythefrogking #caz 🐸

@examishbookwyrm #bookwyrm 🐛

@random-doctor-on-the-internet #ash 🗡

@discoveredreality #ari 🗨

@biblically-accurate-chaos #bean ⚔

@blakat014 #kat 🕸

@rhystheaudhddaydreamer #rhys 🐺

@vizzly-sama #vizzly 🐁

@asclexe #cameron 🐱

@im-ur-sleep-paralysis-demon #demon ☻

@daydream-of-a-wallflower #kat 🍊

@aristos--achaion #void 🕳

@vintagetee13 #aimee 🌼

@childofposiden71 #kriss 💅

@cressthebest #cress 🌸

@idk-what-to-put-here-123 #ruby ❤

@sapphos-queer-kid #marie ✏

@aesthetic-writer18 #raine ✒

@njjisquiet8 #nj ⭐

@irisandthegayestpotatoes #iris 🍃

@jasonsbricky #elliot 🏳️‍🌈

@moonage-nightterrors #el 👀

@tequilaqueen #bea 🦋

@old-lady-habits #aspen 🏵

@buttercup-in-wonderland #buttercup 🌾

@midnights-dragon #tristen 🐉

@scatteredraysofhope #aditi 🦉

@themortalityofundyingstars #chase ✨

@garden-of-runar #ru 🥀

@theoneandonlypjofanatic #jia 🧡

@fairies-in-a-forest #dove 🕊

@dontknowanythingohwell #violet 🌌

this made me realize just how many moots i have lol

this will be updated once a month or so

so if you don't see yourself here, wait a couple weeks. if you still don't see yourself, tell me! you can drop into my askbox with your preferred name and an emoji :)

[benson-thecopy]

Listen guys I know we all love Sehnsucht but genuinely I’d like some more appreciation for my girl LIFAD. It’s literally the same, but instead of submitting you turn around and you hit life in the knees with a crowbar.

It’s draping yourself in furs and silks and covering yourself in fake blood from spirit halloween and weird mysterious black goo to go to a family gathering. Its cleaning your hands on your grandma’s filet crochet. Its throwing yourself on the table and demanding to be sacrificed. It’s whipping and naenaeing. It’s being someone’s sleep paralysis demon. It’s catching fish and watching them die in your hands before gently putting them back in the water. It’s brown noise and loud noise and medieval miniatures and rainstorms and funerals and looking vaguely 3D modeled. It’s knowing that, after all of the pain, there will be gentleness, but that won’t stop you from baring your teeth and snarling. It’s the ikea Djungleskog peluche. It’s about being the halfway point between the slender man and the windingo. It’s about watching shitty eighties porn while you’re cooking.

Do all that and then we’ll talk.

[missszena]

Ever since I discovered the existence of Steel Armor Diablos from that one collab event in MH Explore I have been lead down a rabbit hole of the one person I know who watches Full Metal Alchemist trying to explain why there's a baby in the armor and why they're throwing him at the horrors

I have never been more kerfuzzled in my life by a silly looking Diablos variant

Would still prefer this over the Higanjima fish people those things are like sleep paralysis demons

[jammechanics]

Jam Mechanics Episode 7 baybeeee

Episode 7 finds Matt and Bug writing some 4-chord pop songs and talking hedgehogs, Aliens, and Dr. Who. Bug disappoints Reginald Kenneth Dwight in a big way.

Jam Mechanics is a podcast hosted by Matt (The Narcissist Cookbook) and Bug (Bug Hunter) where we challenge each other to write a song demo from scratch every episode.

If you'd like downloadable files for this episode (and the demos we showed off), ⁠⁠you can go to our Bandcamp: website: https://www.jammechanics.com/ to pay-what-you-want to support us!

Our Music:⁠⁠ The Narcissist Cookbook⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Bug Hunter

-- SPOILERS FOR THIS EPISODE BELOW --

BUG'S SONG Matt's Challenge: BNE SZN (piano only!!) Title: Season Your Beanie Lyrics: I’ll eat my hat if you make it I’m not mad I’m just candid and someone just had to say it there’s no path where you’re headed and you can act all offended I’m a realist and I feel its best you never pretended that there’s a chance in a million you can be handsome or brilliant but you’ll crash like all the others so you can call me the villain one day we’ll look back and laugh, I’ll get a pat on the back but if you make it with your music I will eat my hat

Would like a salad on the side? we can sub it out for fries? We got a dad hat meal plan for 10.99 you can order a fedora that you’ll just adore we got a chef hat special, call it hat du jour Cuz I’ve got 30 milion reasons that can prove you wrong and 200 fans in london singing every damn song I’m rubbin salt in the wounds, just admit you’re defeated you can season your beanie, but you still gotta eat it

you’d eat your hat if I made it so I snapback with a menu when you throw all that shade if you took a bite of brim and didn’t like how it tasted you should’ve sampled the plastic long before you beret-ed

and hey, yeah, maybe you’re right a bit more often than not but you could choose to say nothing, it has no sticker or cost rubbin salt in the wounds to admit you’re defeated you can season your beanie but you still gotta eat it you can season your beanie but you still gotta eat it you can season your beanie but you still gotta eat it

MATT'S SONG Bug's Challenge: Cthulu (Radio-Friendly) Title: Get Deep Fried Lyrics: let's stay in bed all day we'll get away from here tomorrow if the monsters allow what did people ever talk about the television doesn't work right now sit with me beneath the nothing where the stars all used to be before they all went out

they're in the hallway at our door they're in the walls they're in the floor looks like it's all gonna end right as we begin

who called this son of a bitch half mile tall, man looks like a fish the deep one will swallow us all he can swallow my balls who spoke the summoning rite who's up for fresh calimari tonight the deep one? eat my ass more like get deep fried am i right

hentai tentacles gonna kick him right in the genitals he's gonna be like "this is terrible" i'm gonna be like "you look edible" elder god from the ocean floor I bet you wish you could sleep some more i'm your paralysis demon got hooked and you can't stop screamin

they're in the hallway at our door they're in the walls they're in the floor looks like their party's gonna end right as it begins

[g-a-r-o]

You wanna know what kinda shit I'm on? I'm on 15 parts Vicodin, 5 parts agent orange, 2 parts Krispy Kreme donuts ground up in a blender. 50 gallon batch size. I down that shit after every rep. I will fuck you up. I will fuck you down. I will fuck you north, south, east, west, and every other inconceivable secret cardinal direction. I will fuck you into Mordor. I will fuck you into MOUNT DOOM. I AM MOUNT DOOM. Ops call me MOUNT DOOM, because I'm MOTHERFUCKING MOUNT DOOM. The Aztecs built Tenochtitlan when they saw me on a cactus holding your bitch in my beak. I dap up Jesus on the daily. I've fucked Vishnu's butthole. Zeus is a real one. Allah is my op. The state of Utah could never be as huge as me. My circle is fifteen carbon copies of Judas smoking dried out rolled up algae from Leonard Nimoy's pool filtration system. Leonard Nimoy is my op. I would never smoke his algae but my real ones know I'm him. Week-long bender in New Jersey got me looking like Thom Yorke on a normal day. Sloppy toppy afterward, call that the Radio Head. The I-95 was not ready for my grind. That highway got adopted like a fish gets sucked up an intake valve. I'm smoking gnomes. Cheefing fuckin forest creatures like the fire that killed Bambi's mom. I can walk on water. I can swim in the ground. I know the Statue of Liberty very intimately. I have done unfathomable things to the Eifel Tower. I drink Gatorade and I don't even know what the fuck is in that shit. Author of the Kama Sutra self-defenestrated after he heard what I did to his mom. I'm a sex demon from sexy hell. Invented cunnilingus. Gunnifringus too, but it was so fire that the ops had to take me down. Hat man tryna get me off bennys because he knows he can't even fuck with me. I down 1200 mg, he's gotta take twice as much just to get away from me. Sleep paralysis demons couldn't even after they heard my flow. Worst mistake they ever made was forgetting to freeze my jaw. Second worst mistake they ever made was forgetting to freeze my dick. They never made a third mistake. THAT'S the type a shit I'm on

[thelatexshapeshifter]

Just roughing out some Eldritch oc's i haven't ever done anything with they just kinda live in my head rent free.

Ell'crasshs (Ellie) is a eldritch creativity muse and has a living suit type of anatomy (lovely girl but will linger and "back seat art" )

Nickoto, think angler fish but a femboy instead of a light (horny bitch) also only emotes through the lure/ bait and will just stand in the background like a sleep paralysis demon, basically crippling social anxiety with the main body extroverted as fuck while puppeting the bait

[enarmor]

Sleep offers little respite against the pains of the waking world. You drift off, and always you feel as though you are being scrutinized, but when you drift back into consciousness, the feeling fades, not unlike the coming and going of the tide.

One restless night, you are at last approached by The Watcher.

"You have a decision to make."

A feast materializes before you. You can smell it, can nearly taste it, you can feel the warmth and care put into every bite.

You already know, whatever the decision ahead, you can only choose one.

There is something you can't do without.

O Knight, with such love and candor in your spirit,

Will you starve, or will you succumb to a heartless world?

It’s rather lonely to converse with your sleep paralysis demon, isn’t it?

But as Sain blinks, rubs the back of his neck with his hand and more importantly moves, he realizes this is no dream. It’s the dual edge of the crescent moon–gleaming white and stygian black. He could cloak himself in the splendor or fall into the pit in his own stomach. Quite the poetic fork in his road, he thinks. His eyes flare to life with excitement.

“Might I ask you something first?”

His gauntlet slides off his hand as he waits for a reply. He gets none. Fingers reach for food–grazing off a fowl’s bone and the flaky flesh of some fish–before silence is taken to mean ‘yes’.

One day, that habit will land him in trouble.

“You haven’t brought any to-go boxes, have you?” The air of their conversation flies like a harp’s song before slapping the Watcher in the face. Sain's question is asked in a high note, with a gentle turn of his head–as if he had even considered this a choice. “Because a feast is hardly complete without friends! There are a few I’d like to share this with.”

No response, again. This time, he chooses to interpret differently. “…No? Ah, what a shame,” the beast is poked on the nose, and Sain offers a parting shot before turning to leave, “I’ll take my chances on my own, then.”

[leffee]

your daily or more like weekly or whatever lps dump because I need to talk about it like it's 2014, mostly screencaps edition

I just love how done Vinnie looks here lol look at him, he looks like he's about to "Okay, Esteban danger danger danger listen here, you little shit-." Oop. Season 1 Vinnie was pretty sarcastic and done with everyone, and I miss him

I... don't remember why I took this screencap actually, probably just thought that Vinnie looked funny, like what he doing

I just love love everyone's expressions here especially Vinnie's and Zoe looks like she just witnessed true horror

A similiar one but from a different episode and also - the expressions are priceless, look at them.

Now those two birds eye view of the pets and it's absolutely terryfying each time. Vinnie looks nightmarish but so does Penny Ling and basically everyone whose eyes are visible.

"Littlest pet shop - we don't sell pets we cater to them 🤨?" I don't think so, who put Olive in this tiny aquarium? Girl can barely turn in there. Also kinda weird that she's here now (this is 2nd episode) and out of her shell but then in the same season they bring her back and hide her. Theen again I'm pretty sure no one really remembered that when watching it, so yeah. Still, they do sell pets 🗣🗣 at least in 1st season, there was also an episode when they were selling a turtle, a snake, and a fish. Liars liars

Bro- the look Vinnie is giving Sunil is just *cries from happiness* why is he so precious?? Why is he so smol. Obsessions obsessions. Also look at Zoe just happily walking like :]

My man is catching lamps

Sleep paralysis demon Zoe version

And last but not least

low quality blythe

[commonguttersnipe]

Smash or Pass: Monty Python's "The Meaning of Life" character edition*

At last, the finale SorP post has arrived! (Now that you've watched the final movie in the Monty Python quadrilogy.)

*(This time though, Smash or Pass the MoL characters but in order of the chapters from the film):

Introduction

Part 1: The Miracle of Birth

The Miracle of Birth Part 2: The Third World

(Bonus chapter that is a deleted scene) The Adventures of Martin Luther

Part 2: Growth and Learning

Part 3: Fighting Each Other

The Middle of the Film

Find the Fish

Part 4: Middle Age

Part 5: Live Organ Transplants

Part 6: The Autumn Years

Part 6 B: The Meaning of Life

Part 7: Death

The End of the Film

Yay! I can finally do this!

The fish- Pass (I’m not fucking a fish, let alone six)

The doctors- Pass (they treat that woman so badly. Brownie points for being progressive towards gender though)

Yorkshire Man- SMASH (there’s a reason he has so many kids…)

Protestant Man- Pass (he’s a twat.)

Teacher- Smash (I’m sorry. I apologise with tears.)

Teacher’s wife- Smash (she’s hot.)

The Officer- Smash (if he’s nice enough to receive gifts, he’s nice enough for me)

Army RSM- Smash (I know something I’d rather be doing than drill practice…)

British Empire Officers- Pass (look, I love a man in uniform. Not too keen on them if they are uptight racists)

Tiger Suit Boys- Smash (I could take them both... Not in a fight)

Middle Of The Film Announcer- Smash (Michael in drag? Yes please!)

Find The Fish- Pass (all three of them are my sleep paralysis demons. They scare me. I never want to see them ever again.)

American Couple- Smash (I’m actually very invested in a dungeon themed restaurant. Get on it, Disney)

Mrs Brown- Smash (I think she’s quite pretty)

Galaxy Song Man- SMASH (sing to me about my insignificance! PLEASE!)

Musician- Smash (sure, he sings about his penis but hey! At least he sings.)

Mr Creosote- Pass (*Vietnam flashbacks*)

Waiter- Smash (I also go on long spiels that end up nowhere.)

Death- Smash (something about his voice, y’know)

Condemned Man- Pass (most sexist way to die, if I may say so)

Dinner Party- Smash (why are they all so hot? Angela, if you’re free on Friday, I'm free on Friday.)

Heaven Singer- Smash (I feel like I'm mainly attracted to the people who sing in this film...)

I did it!!

[spidercookie18]

If you're in kahoots with my sleep paralysis demon, here's a few things that scare the balls off me.

Teeth ("too many teeth in a mouth" kind of teeth, and medical diagrams)

Those weird creepypasta eyes

The ocean (or any body of water with fish in it)

(^thalassophobia, basically the vast from magnus archives)

"Not" things (not dogs, not deer, not people)

Needles/scissors (but not knives)

Trypophobia (although who doesn't get the creeps from that stuff)

[prototypesteve]

And if we run away, it’s because some of us are both aromantic AND legit terrified of coelacanths because we got lost in an aquarium as a kid and ran into an embalmed one in a tank in an otherwise pitch black room, and it was like seeing sleep paralysis demon in the flesh.

It’s never you. It’s always aromanticism or embalmed coelacanths.

I’m just in the laundry room, with all the lights on in the house, playing Hello Kitty Island Adventure on my phone, waiting for the fish-terror to fade, so my jaw will unlock and I can explain that some of us don’t feel anything past friendship, because the fish thing is gonna be even harder to explain than an obscure LGBTQIA orientation.

Honestly, you don't need dating advice save for "just be yourself". If a guy isn't seduced by your extensive lecture about coealacanths, or a girl isn't impressed by you gaming the McDonald's systems to finesse yourself 30 free chicken nuggets, you're on a date with the wrong person. Not a bad person, but one that isn't the right match for you, and the way you want to live.

First dates are for showing someone "hey this is the kind of life I like to be living", them doing the same, until you find someone who clicks and you both think "fuck yeah I want to live like this." Whether that's sitting in a café judging joggers, or casually committing small crime for shits and giggles.

[skill7spark04]

Insane Skribbl.io

on the internet there's this free browser based party game called skribbl.io.

this is a list of words I add to the game to fuck with my friends. there s brainrot, inside jokes, Fandom, and general insanity in here... put it here so you too, can torment your friends! (it's better if you throw in a few normal ones as well.) Sayo-nara, Natsuri, Sayonika, Deez Nuts, Ligma, Spider, a goat driving a car, sleep paralysis demons, realistic human heart, a tuna fish sandwich, shadow wizard money gang, nuclear bomb, among us, hangman, landmine, taco bell, 3 pristine human skulls, sans undertale, our-tube, you-tube, bing-chilling, man im dead, racoon, insane, mirror, the moon isnt real, the earth is flat, birds are drones, godsomeonepleasehelpme, how the fuck do I draw this, what,  demon time, prop hunt, the mexican beer virus, Rick Astley, do not pick this word, tarantula on a keyboard, your IP address, the worst country in the world, microtransactions, hell, Sayoris best friend, depression, the voices in my head, crazy, mario, sand guardian, shotgun, is that a bullet, wheel of fortune, lag, veronika, rubber room with rats, minecraft youtuber, the actual end of the universe, what the fuck, fortnite battlepass among us, trollface, tree, Hey It’s me Goku, Monika.ai, bottled water, monkey, the color black, the trolley problem, Nuke Radio