#my cousin used to live in southern CA with her bio dad for high school and used to have a boyfriend

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Rachel Berry | December 18 | 24 | San Francisco, CA | Vocalist for Divine Influence | Fiona Hudson

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♫ I’ve had enough, this is my prayer ♫

Rachel’s story began with Hiram and LeRoy Berry. After years of partnership and being as close to married as they could legally be, the two men decided to have a baby. After sorting through hundreds of surrogate options, they found a woman who matched their IQ, beauty, and talent standards. After some clever use of a turkey baster (that they promptly threw out), they had a baby on the way. That following December they got the best Hanukkah/Christmas gift possible when they took their baby girl Rachel home.

Home, for reference, was actually San Francisco, California. It was Hayes Valley to be exact, AKA one of the districts of San Francisco with those houses they showed in the Full House theme song (by the way, Rachel would quickly point out those houses are not nearly as big as the show seemed to believe). She was raised in a Jewish home...but they still sort of celebrated Christmas and weren’t super religious or anything. 

Rachel also grew up pursuing various activities. Her parents encouraged her to do whatever she could, so she did music, gymnastics, dancing, horseback riding, everything. And it seemed to be wherever she went, she ran into Kitty Wilde. Kitty was a tiny blonde girl who Rachel didn’t like at first; Kitty was just as rude and opinionated as Rachel could be, and in a lot of their classes, she was sometimes as talented. Maybe even more so when it came to gymnastics and horseback riding. But the two soon became friends, best friends, and they constantly talked on the phone, online, or at each other’s houses. The only disappointing thing was that Kitty didn’t go to her school, since Kitty’s parents sent her to some fancy, religious private school.

And without Kitty at school, Rachel didn’t do so hot. Not grades wise, obviously, because she was a straight A student, but she didn’t fit in well with her classmates. Between her never-ending chatter about everything from musical theater to how her dads had made her, to the animals on her sweaters and high knee-socks, Rachel was, well, a freak. It was a harsh reality for a girl who had been raised by two men who constantly showered her with praise. Even the theater oriented kids seemed to barely stand her at times.

And, as much as she loved her dads, it really made her long for a mom. Her dads would tell her to just ignore the bullies, which she already did, but it didn’t make her feel any better. Rachel was stubborn and strong and never bended to the will of her bullies and never would, but she wanted someone to tell her it would be okay and hug her. And while her fathers did that from time to time, it never seemed to help. Maybe a mom’s hug would be better, right? Even Kitty’s mom did that well, and Rachel was always nervous about it.

By the time she entered high school, she had started to ask about her mom more frequently. Her dads never gave up much information at first, but they finally relented during her freshman year after her fifteenth birthday. They got her in contact with Shelby Corcoran, the woman who gave birth to her. 

Shelby, it turned out, ran a show choir in the East Bay. The two of them met up a few times and talked about musical theater and their lives and their dreams. It seemed to be going great. But Rachel, who had always wanted a mom, didn’t really need one anymore, at least not as much as she had thought. And Shelby, who had always wanted to be a mom, needed to be one, and not in the way Rachel needed one. It was too late for them to have the relationship they had both wanted. So Shelby started to look into adoption and the two decided to stay in contact, but Rachel knew they’d never have the relationship she had craved for years, and it really did crush her.

Before she could tailspin too much about it, Kitty told her some major news; at a sleepover at another girl’s house, she had been molested by the girl’s older brother. Rachel turned all of her own internal crisis energy into helping Kitty through hers. She was as attentive as possible, and when Kitty declared she was switching to Rachel’s school, Rachel was excited to have her best friend at her side. It really made all the mother stuff seem so unimportant.

Kitty, as rude and blunt as she could be, made Rachel update her wardrobe before the school year started. Once school started, Kitty was immediately popular and she brought Rachel up the ranks with her, and Rachel made Kitty do some of the school musicals along with cheerleading and the dance team. School was much more enjoyable for the both of them. They were already best friends, but they truly became each other’s rocks during those last three years. So while Rachel was leaning towards UCLA anyways, knowing that Kitty wanted to go to USC (University of Southern California) helped make that decision a lot easier. The two of them would move down to LA together and start a new life as adults.

♫ That I die livin’ just as free as my hair ♫

Originally Kitty and Rachel moved into a place a girl named Tanya had advertised on craigslist, but after their freshman year, Tanya moved out and they needed a new roommate. They advertised on craigslist in return and, after interviewing some applicants, they finally settled on Samantha “Sam” Evans. While Sam had only just gotten a job at Target, she was actually nice and seemed interested in the other girls’ lives, unlike their previous roommate who mainly hid in her room with her boyfriend all night. The fact that Sam had a bundle of money for first and last month’s rent also helped their decision.

So Sam moved in and easily blended in with Rachel’s tap practicing and Kitty’s Sunday church services. In fact, Sam and Kitty really hit it off with that whole church thing, which sort of hurt. See, for so long it had been just Kitty and Rachel, so seeing someone get really close stung. And Rachel was gone so often for school and voice lessons and practices that she didn’t see her best friend enough as is. Add in the fact that Rachel was Jewish and wouldn’t feel comfortable joining them at church and you had a whole bag of insecurities.

But, being the person Rachel is, she never talked about it. How did you tell your best friend that seeing them befriend someone else hurt without sounding like a crazy, obsessive stalker? Rachel figured that if she just became closer with Sam, the insecure feelings would start to fade.

So the whole band idea was kind of perfect. She got to know Sam better, especially since they wrote the bulk of their songs together. Rachel started to finally feel comfortable in her house again, and she found herself looking forward to band practice almost as much as some of her musical theater rehearsals. Sometimes she even looked forward to it more.

The three of them first went with the name Rsk, because of their initials. They got a few gigs with that name, but after some time, Sam suggested Divine Influence, and the name seemed to fit much better. 

Eventually Rachel and Kitty’s senior year started. Between band practices and gigs and getting ready for her senior showcase, Rachel was constantly busy and almost never rested. Still, it was work she loved, so she couldn’t complain, even if she was exhausted. She actually felt like she needed a break after she graduated. And, to be honest, she wasn’t ready to break up the band just yet. So Rachel auditioned for local productions and worked on songs with Sam and Kitty, slowly starting to get more gigs and polishing their work.

Finally, after months of pleading from Rachel, Kitty called her cousin, Quinn Fabray, and Quinn talked to Sabrina Smythe who landed them an audition. That led to a contract, which all three of them signed.

Once the contract was signed, Divine Influence worked endlessly on their songs, trying to improve old works and create even better songs. In the last few weeks, they met up with The Sirens a few times and got to know each other, and even got one of the members to feature on and help write a track. Okay, technically they had met once when they performed in California and Kitty got Sam and Rachel backstage passes, but it was nice to talk to them as colleagues instead of fans. Rachel was honestly honored when she was asked to perform on one of their tracks.

Their debut album, From Afar, hit shelves in January, and was a pretty big success. They performed on talk shows and in a few events around the country before they got to announce that they were joining The Sirens on their world tour.

And all of that was already amazing, but the deal got even sweeter. After bringing up her musical theater background enough and even posting some of her old clips from myspace, she got the attention of some big theater names. After a live audition, she was offered one of her dream roles, Eponine in Les Miserables. The show is scheduled to start after the tour, of course, but Rachel is obviously excited.

However, it’s bringing up some issues she knows she has to face. Does she want to keep doing the band when the run is done? What if she gets offered the chance to play the lead in West Side Story or, even better, Funny Girl? She loves her band and her bandmates so much, but musical theater was her first dream. For all she knows she won’t love it as much as being in Divine Influence, but what if she loves it more? Can she disappoint her fans? And, even more importantly, can she disappoint her best friends?

So while the show is a dream come true, it’s been making Rachel more anxious, and in some cruel twist of fate, Rachel’s finally experiencing actual stage fright. Along with that, she’s been dealing with awful anxiety issues and even panic attacks. She started seeing a therapist, something only Sabrina and Quinn know about, but Rachel doesn’t want to worry her bandmates over something she thinks is so stupid. What does she have to be anxious about?

It’s not like she could mess up on tour so badly that she’d ruin the lives of her best friends forever and get her Broadway debut cancelled...right?

♫ I’ve had enough, I’m not a freak ♫

Kitty Wilde: While Rachel and Kitty might seem like an odd match to some, the two are truly the best of friends. They’re basically sisters, since Kitty’s parents love Rachel and Rachel’s parents love Kitty. Ever since they were kids, they’ve been inseparable, and after what happened to Kitty, they became even closer. Rachel’s always been worried about her since and has stayed by her side and helped her get to therapy appointments and everything, all of which inspired Kitty to go into psychology in college. That’s why she knows Kitty would understand the whole anxiety problem, but Kitty is dealing with her own problems with accepting her sexuality and all. Rachel doesn’t want to stress her out any further, especially since she’s worried that Kitty might be angry about the Broadway thing. But, hey, at least Rachel’s one of the few people who can tease Kitty about her obvious crush on a certain lead singer of The Sirens.

Sam Evans: When Sam moved in and got along so well with Kitty, Rachel was a bit upset. She hates admitting it, but since she was gone so much, it seemed like she never got to see Kitty and it felt like Sam was replacing her. they had inside jokes and their Sunday church visits and Bible discussion together, so it was a lot. Once they started the band and Rachel got to know Sam more, the two easily became close friends and bonded. Now Sam is second only to Kitty in Rachel’s book, and she’s also proven to be an amazing songwriting partner. Because they’re so close, Rachel can tell that something’s going on between her and Sabrina, but she knows that asking her won’t provide any answers. Instead, she’ll just have to keep an eye on those two.

Quinn Fabray: Seeing as Rachel grew up close to Kitty and Kitty also grew up close to Quinn, Rachel has known Quinn for quite some time. Quinn was always so beautiful and intelligent and had this confidence that Rachel always admired; she was her idol. So when Quinn of all people found her in a bathroom stall hyperventilating from a panic attack, Rachel thought she was going to die from embarrassment. But much to her surprise, Quinn sat down next to her and started working on her breathing. Once her breathing leveled, Quinn even got her to laugh. When Rachel admitted it wasn’t her first panic attack of the week, Quinn immediately got her help with her therapist that she arranged private meetings with via Sabrina. Now the two keep talking more and more, and Rachel finds herself looking forward to seeing Quinn, but this time, it’s not from idolizing her. This time, they’re kind of on equal footing, and Rachel really likes that.

Sabrina Smythe: Okay, Rachel was happy enough with Sabrina for getting her band their recording contract and the touring gig with The Sirens. Her gratefulness grew, however, when Quinn took her to see Sabrina about getting her into therapy. Sabrina, who was often sarcastic and snarky, immediately took the matter seriously and got Rachel an appointment. While Rachel knows a lot of it was to make sure she didn’t ruin the tour, she knows Sabrina also genuinely cares about her wellbeing whenever she schedules private sessions. She’s also grateful that Sabrina hasn’t told her band mates, either, since she doesn’t want to worry them about it. However, as thankful as she is, Rachel can’t help noticing that there’s something odd going on between her and Sam, and her gratefulness isn’t enough to make her ignore it completely.

Marley Rose: While Rachel was honored to work with The Sirens, she was a bit nervous as well. She didn’t know them that well, and she wasn’t sure how nice they’d be, especially Marley, who she worked with the most in the recording studio. Marley, however, turned out to be nicer than Rachel ever imagined. She was so sweet and humble and she gave Rachel compliments that she honestly needed to hear at the time. Even now, Marley still always seems there and asking how she feels and genuinely seems to mean it. She gives her compliments and helps lift her mood. And, hey, seeing as her best friend definitely has some feelings for Marley, maybe Rachel can help push the two of them together. Playing matchmaker can’t be that dangerous, right?

Norah Puckerman: Out of luck more than most anything else, Norah happened to be around their recording booth as Kitty and Rachel were ironing out the song “Turn the Lights Down Low”. She offered some advice and, before Rachel knew it, they were writing the song together and making it better than before. Norah agreed to help record it (and, of course, Sabrina worked out the details for what that would entail). The two had a lot of fun flirting in the song and in the booth, though Rachel’s really not into her that way, and she’s pretty sure Norah doesn’t feel that way about her, either. Norah just likes to flirt. And it’s something that’s fun to do. It’s also nice to have someone on tour who’s Jewish as well, especially after dealing with years of Sam and Kitty bonding over Christianity.

Jackie Puckerman: Rachel met Jackie on set of their music video for “Hey Beautiful Angel”. Right from the get go, Rachel was sure to be nice and polite with her, and that turned out to be a good thing, since now they’re on tour together. It’s also good because Kitty was not so nice to her. Things have seemed to calm down there, though, which is good for Rachel’s anxiety. Having the additional backup is nice as well, and Rachel has been giving Jackie a ton of tips to make sure she’s holding up. Jackie seems grateful for the tips and has been nothing but nice to her.

Fiona Hudson: Rachel didn’t talk to Fiona at much, just because with her own anxiety, talking to new people was very difficult for her. However, when she noticed her and Kat and Kitty not getting along, she sort of wanted to befriend her - yes, partly because she wanted to apologize for Kitty’s behavior and partly because having someone else have a complicated relationship with Kat was nice. Not that she fed into that or anything, but whatever. Anyways, now that Fiona is playing the drums for The Sirens, she’s been trying to get some stage fright tips from Rachel which is truly the most ironic and awful thing to happen to her. She has always been great about giving advise whether people want it or not. Now she’s lost as what to say to her ever.

Katrina Hummel: Rachel’s feeling anxious these days, that much is obvious. Between hiding her therapy from her bandmates and Kitty having to add practices with the Sirens for playing for them on tour, she hasn’t seen as much of her best friend as usual. And while she got used to Sam being her best friend’s new buddy, she’s not quite sure she’ll get over the fad of #KittyKat -- of course fans seem to actually ship them, too, which is also really weird. Anyways, Rachel knows she’s being this insecure brat about the whole thing, since she also knows that Kitty could use an out and proud gay woman to help her through her sexuality issues. It just always sucks when your best friend have a million inside jokes with someone else. Rachel knows she should talk to Kitty about it and actually try to befriend Kat. From what she knows they have a lot in common in terms of a love of musical theater -- though Rachel thinks it’s good that Kat didn’t pursue that since she doesn’t have a strong enough voice for it. What? She’s just being honest.

Blair Anderson: Rachel met Blair after the younger girl started at UCLA. They didn’t interact much since Rachel was, of course, always the lead in the shows and Blair was often just in the chorus, but Rachel always offered her advice and was obviously very nice. There’s something nice about having one of her old back-up singers back, but Blair’s certainly improved. Like, a lot. And her voice is sticking out a bit from Jackie’s because of that, and so maybe Rachel’s reminding her to blend. What? She just wants the tour to sound great. That’s all. It’s not that she thinks “Blam” or whatever is awful, either, she just thinks Sam already has good enough friends in her band and with like Norah and Fiona - and, okay, why is no one hardcore shipping her with a band or tourmate? - and Blair doesn’t need a solo in the encore, because the fans are there for the bands, not her, that’s all. It’s not like she has this fear of Blair taking over or anything. Of course not. That would be ridiculous.

♫ I just keep fightin' to stay cool on the streets ♫

Are you nervous about performing for all those crowds?

[answer here]

Do you ever wonder what it would be like if you grew up with your mom around?

[answer here]

JBI asks: If you could have any role in a movie adaptation of a musical, which one would you pick?

[answer here]