#my art's been complete shit lately but ehhhh it is what it is I guess

[itshirohi]

Tiger Niko Tiger Niko Tiger Niko Tiger Niko- I ran out of ideas on what to draw. Also take this stupid edit I made. As always I put too much effort into this shit lol

[greeblingyaoza]

I might get shit for this, but I’m going to express my opinion here anyways. In regards to headcanons involving Ling’s sexuality/gender identity. This gets kind of long, and is also me analyzing why I feel a certain way about these things and whether I should think differently... Also some of my feelings/opinions may be problematic. 

I dislike headcanons for Ling being gay (as in 100% gay, ONLY interested in guys), a trans-woman, and even a trans-man. 

Before I go on, I will say that I’m not saying people shouldn’t have these headcanons. Have whatever headcanons you like. However, I’m only expressing my personal opinions on them, and I have nothing against someone who has these headcanons. 

My reason for disliking gay Ling headcanons: If Ling was gay, that would destroy the Lingfan ship, one of few ships I genuinely care about. It also destroys my self-ship with him, since I’m a heterosexual girl who has a huge crush on him. I know he’s not real, and I don’t own him, and can never be with him anyways, so him being gay would really change nothing for me. It would just mean I couldn’t self-ship with him without erasing his sexuality, so I’d likely have to force myself to get over him. 

Reason for disliking trans-girl Ling headcanons: Again, I’m a straight girl with a crush on him, so it doesn’t work for me at all. Also, I don’t exactly get the point of the headcanon because he obviously considers himself male, so hc-ing him as a trans-male would make more sense. I get people like to project onto their favorite charactesr, so if someone is a trans-girl, they want their favorite male characters to be trans-girls as well. But I feel like it would make more sense to headcanon the already female characters as trans women. 

Reason for disliking trans-male Ling headcanons: Okay, this is what I might really get shit for. I’ll be honest. I’m not sure if I’d be willing to date a trans-guy. Well, if I’d be willing to date ANYONE to even begin with (I’m only interested in fictional characters) I feel like I probably have a preference for cis guys. I know that’s considered transphobic. Because this implies I wouldn’t see him as a man. I do consider trans people as the gender they identify as. Let me get that straight. But I’m not sure if I could date someone trans due to anatomical reasons. I know that’s probably awful. I don’t know if this makes me a bad person or not. I like to think that it’s okay to have preferences as long as you aren’t shaming people for not fitting their preferences. Like....I rarely ever shave my legs. I realize a lot of guys don’t like that. I think they’re allowed to have a preference for shaven legs...but I would take issue if they put me down for not shaving my legs. I know that’s not the same as gender identity, but, that’s just how I feel about it. I’ll just say it, I prefer cis Ling. Also while I don’t consider fictional characters confirmed straight until proven otherwise, in my mind, I think of characters as cis unless proven otherwise by the creator. I never have trans headcanons. But this is also because I’m a cis person who doesn’t need representation. 

Would Ling being any of these above things be good rep? Yeah, sure. However, if I had the choice between...Ling becomes canonically gay and trans and people are happy for the representation, OR Ling is cishet and I get to continue shipping myself with him and shipping him with a girl, I’d choose for him to be cishet. Because I’m a selfish person. 

The headcanons I’m cool with for Ling is...straight Ling, bi/pan Ling, asexual Ling, cis Ling...that’s about it. Because those would still work with what I personally want. 

Non-binary Ling? Eh....it’s okay I guess. Aromantic Ling? Ehhhh...I’m not really aro or ace (though I may be demisexual at the most, because other than someone I feel very strongly for, I’m kind of put off by sex and sexual things)....but I’m definitely not aromantic so...wouldn’t really work for me. 

I’m cool with bi Ling because I 100% ship him with Lan Fan and I casually ship him with Greed on the side, but I’m not as serious about it. But that’s it. And if I ship him with Greed, I prefer him to have feelings for Lan Fan as well. Like I can’t see Lingfan not being a thing, but this is also because I’m suuuppper biased. 

And there’s on more thing...Poly Ling. I have mixed feelings on that. I don’t believe I’m polyamorous. I’ve never been in a relationship in my life, but I definitely would prefer a relationship between me and the one person I love, and I wouldn’t be comfy with them dating other people if they ended up being poly. However, I currently have romantic feelings for both Greed and Ling. Normally my feelings only focus on one character at a time, so this situation is a bit unusual. I feel like if they were real, I’d be willing to try to be in a relationship with them both, as long as they were cool with it, and I’d even be okay if they were together as well. I also can enjoy LingGreedFan as an ot3 even though poly ships aren’t really my thing. However, bring anyone else into the mix? Nope. Can’t do it. However, would this relationship work if they weren’t poly? Would me wanting to be with both of them make me poly? 

Thing is I could also see Greed being polyamorous. I mean we see him with two women at one point in the manga. I could do some reaching and say that maybe he was filling the lonely void in his heart with multiple sexual partners just like he was with other things, such as money and desire for world domination, and that post-Greed-admitting-to-only-wanting-friends would be totally willing to settle for a monogamous relationship with the right person. But of course, let’s say he was real...I would never be able to handle a relationship with him or Ling if they wanted to date other people as well. If they wouldn’t be happy in a monogamous relationship, I’d just let them go. Same with anyone I would happen to have feelings for. Some people may say it’s abusive/toxic to not let your poly partner date other people if they want to...so best thing to do would be to not date a poly person myself. 

I think the thing about the poly headcanons is that I still have this idea ingrained into me that monogamous relationships >>> everything else. I grew up with the idea is that it’s taboo and wanting to be with a lot of people or sleep with a lot of people is inherently bad. Which I know is wrong...poly relationships can be just as valid. And if people want to sleep with a lot of people, that’s not a crime as long as it’s consensual and honest. I guess I just can’t relate, so it makes it harder for me to be completely open to it. 

Also I do tend to ship mostly het ships. Which may be bad? Idk. But I think the reason for that is that I usually don’t give two hecks about a ship unless it 1) involves a character I have a crush on and 2) involves another character with the previous character that I can project onto and imagine myself in the place of. And since I’m a heterosexual girl...well...naturally my preferred ships end up being het. 

Also, this is the same reason that leads to me feeling uncomfortable about Edl/ing. But why is it that I’m okay with greed x ling but not Ling x Ed? I think the reason is...I have a crush on both Ling and Greed, so I can get behind it. Ed...I don’t have any attraction to, nor can I self-project onto him, so it doesn’t work at all. It makes me kind of sad, because that ship is getting so popular lately (probably more popular than Lingfan, which makes me feel...somewhat salty...I mean just the number of new edl/ing posts on the daily compared to the lower number of lingfan seems to show that edl/ing is more popular now. (sometimes I worry that it’s because people think Lingfan is bad/problematic/unhealthy and shouldn’t be shipped :/ ) I mean a lot of people are just sick of het stuff, so maybe that’s why so few people seem to care about my otp anymore...I guess that’s valid. Again, can’t relate. Sometimes it makes me sad. Sometimes I try to force myself to like the ship. Sometimes I see art that’s objectively good and cute and I would have shared it...had it been Lingfan instead. I feel bad about not sharing it. I feel hateful. Sometimes I get angry whenever I see the ship. OR people talking about how great it is...and how “canon” it is, like I just don’t see it. If someone wants to try to convince me why it’s good, they can. I’m open to hearing other opinions, but I just prefer them as friends only. 

I know that’s so immature. I really dislike all these headcanons and that one ship because it gets in the way of MY ship and MY romantic feelings. Which is stupid because...none of these headcanons, mine nor theirs, are canon. Lingfan isn’t canon, no matter the implications. Greed x Ling...not canon. The ship I can’t get into...also not canon, therefore it’s not really threatening me at all??

Okay so, if anyone wants to give my constructive criticism on this and say that some of my feelings here are problematic and harmful to others, you can. I’m willing to have civil discussions on the matter. 

Also another thing, is I realize I’m probably unhealthily obsessed with my fictional crushes, and I need to seek professional help for it, along with my many other issues. It’s not healthy that I feel so saddened by a ship involving my fictional crush that I feel like it invalidates all my feelings and headcanons and essentially ruins my whole day, and leads me to not be able to focus on anything else. 

Sometimes I HATE having romantic feelings at all, because this is how I get, with every single character I fall for, every single time.