#mst3k: agent for h.a.r.m.
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mst3k - extreme!
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To this day, I can't cook or eat rice without saying to myself, "EXTREEME RICE!!"
#mst3k#mystery science theater 3000#extreme#rice#extreme rice#agent for h.a.r.m.#life in the 90s#Youtube
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Yeah, the show's own creators/writers being at best apathetic to the Sci-Fi channel's executive mandate to have Season 8 feature a running storyline of sorts is one of those great ironies to me, because on the one hand I do get it; it really is fairly far afield of what the show's actually about, and I rather doubt it played to the strengths or inclinations of anyone working on the show? But on the other hand it's kind of the reason I became a fan of the show in the first place; my first episode was "Giant Spider Invasion", which features an "Invasion of the Bodysnatchers" parody story-line, and while I very much loved the actual movie-watching segments, it was those host segments with the storyline specifically that made me really want to come back for more. Something about the specific combination of these characters, this setting, with an actual Story just sort of resonated with me, and I rather suspect it's precisely because it felt so out of place from what you might otherwise expect.
We of the Intergalactic Tribunal, bound by neither space nor time, find your atrocities typical of humankind.
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MST3K's most wanted
I've been organizing my Mystery Science Theater 3000 collection, so I've become preoccupied with the handful of episodes that are not easily available, and the reasons why. In case in anyone else is interested, I thought I'd share what I've learned.
For our purposes we'll be focusing on the ten seasons that aired on cable, from 1989 to 1999. With the post-2017 episodes, it's trivial to purchase them on home video or streaming. And the pre-cable stuff, from KTMA, is widely available as bootleg footage, which is probably about as good as you're ever going to get. But the episodes from the cable era have been notoriously difficult to re-release, and require special attention.
Of the 176 MST3K episodes that aired on cable, 166 have been released on home video, and 145 are available for streaming/download on the Gizmoplex. As someone who's been trying to collect the whole series since the 1990s, I think that's pretty impressive. But there are 40 episodes that have been particularly tricky. Let's take a look, won't you?
Currently available on the Gizmoplex, but never on home video (1):
913 - Quest of the Delta Knights
As I understand it, nobody was sure who owned the rights to this movie, or how to contact them, for years. The situation has only recently been cleared up, perhaps too late for a DVD release.
Currently available on the Gizmoplex, but out of print on home video (8):
203 - Jungle Goddess
317 - Viking Women and the Sea Serpent
319 - War of the Colossal Beast
510 - The Painted Hills
619 - Red Zone Cuba
806 - The Undead
808 - The She-Creature
912 - The Screaming Skull
It looks like all of these went out of print due to being on a set where a different episode's rights expired. Theoretically Shout Factory could re-release any of them in a "Lost and Found" set, but that may not be cost-effective as people move away from collecting physical media.
Currently available on home video and MST3K's official YouTube, but not on the Gizmoplex (1):
615 - Kitten with a Whip (Vol. 25 DVD, 2012)
Kitten is one of the Universal movies that could only be licensed for physical media. And yet, it's the only one I can find on the official YouTube channel. Beats me why that is.
Currently available on home video, but not on the Gizmoplex (16):
401 - Space Travelers (Vol. 32 DVD, 2015)
522 - Teen-Age Crime Wave (Vol. 33 DVD, 2015)
524 - 12 to the Moon (Vol. 35 DVD, 2016)
601 - Girls Town (Vol. 39 DVD, 2017)
605 - Colossus and the Headhunters (Vol. 38 DVD, 2017)
614 - San Francisco International (Vol. 32 DVD, 2015)
704 - The Incredible Melting Man (Vol. 36 DVD, 2016)
801 - Revenge of the Creature (Vol. 25 DVD, 2012)
802 - The Leech Woman (25th Anniversary Edition DVD, 2013)
803 - The Mole People (Vol. 26 DVD, 2013)
804 - The Deadly Mantis (Vol. 27 DVD, 2013)
805 - The Thing That Couldn't Die (Vol. 29 DVD, 2013)
814 - Riding With Death (Vol. 36 DVD, 2016)
815 - Agent for H.A.R.M (Vol. 33 DVD, 2015)
901 - The Projected Man (Vol. 30 DVD, 2014)
1013 - Diabolik (Vol. 39 DVD, 2017)
I was able to find the DVD sets listed above on Shout Factory's website. As far as I know, they'll remain in print for the foreseeable future, but there's no way to know how long that will last.
The general pattern with these episodes is that the movies are owned by major studios that would only license them for physical media. Columbia owns Teen-Age Crime Wave and 12 to the Moon. MGM owns Girls Town and The Incredible Melting Man. Paramount owns Diabolik. But the big player here is Universal, which controls the rights to Space Travelers, San Francisco International, Revenge of the Creature, Leech Woman, Mole People, Deadly Mantis, Thing That Couldn't Die, Riding With Death, Agent for H.A.R.M., and Projected Man.
The odd man out here is Colossus and the Headhunters; I can't find any info on who owns the rights to this film, which may be part of the problem.
The real hard cases, the stickiest of wickets, are below...
Released on home video, but now out of print (5):
212 - Godzilla vs. Megalon (Vol. 10 DVD, 2006)
309 - The Amazing Colossal Man (VHS, 1996)
910 - The Final Sacrifice (Vol. 17 DVD, 2010)
1001 - Soultaker (Vol. 14 DVD, 2009)
1012 - Squirm (Turkey Day Collection DVD, 2014)
Megalon and Colossal Man were both recalled when rights issues came up after they were released. Oops. These were produced by Rhino, back before Shout Factory took over.
The Final Sacrifice is particularly tough to find, even unofficially, because director Tjardus Greidanus is very aggressive about tracking down download links. I always figured someone was similarly possessive of Soultaker, since it's clearly a passion project, but that's purely my speculation.
The Turkey Day DVD set is still available on Amazon at a reasonable price, so Squirm is still relatively accessible for now.
Never released on home video or streaming (9):
201 - Rocketship X-M
213 - Godzilla vs. the Sea Monster
311 - It Conquered the World
416 - Fire Maidens of Outer Space
418 - Attack of the the Eye Creatures
807 - Terror from the Year 5000
809 - I was a Teenage Werewolf
905 - The Deadly Bees
906 - The Space Children
In 2017, Shout released its final (?) MST3K DVD collection, which included Satellite Dishes, a compilation of host segments from episodes that "may never get a legitimate release." This included the nine listed above, as well as The Amazing Colossal Man and Quest for the Delta Knights. Of course, Delta Knights eventually got a digital-only release, which is cause for a glimmer of hope. But the others are probably tougher nuts to crack.
Wade Williams owned the rights to Rocketship X-M and had a particular sentimental attachment to the film. His death in 2023 may make it easier to negotiate with his estate, but I wouldn't count on that being a swift process.
Godzilla vs. Megalon and Godzilla vs. The Sea Monster are part of a prestigious franchise, and it's remarkable MST3K got away with riffing on Godzilla movies in the first place. I get the impression that Japanese culture doesn't particularly appreciate the sort of mockery MST3K is known for, so the rights to these two movies may be a long, long shot. Then again I used to think there was no hope of for the Gamera episodes too.
Fire Maidens, Deadly Bees, and Space Children are owned by Olive Films, and currently licensed to Paramount. It's possible a deal can be made later on, but not until the current arrangement expires.
The major bugbear for MST3K fandom is Susan Hart, the widow of American International Pictures co-founder James Nicholson. One way or another the AIP catalog was split up and Hart laid claim to several of their films, including Amazing Colossal Man, It Conquered the World, Eye Creatures, Terror from the Year 5000, and Teenage Werewolf. Hart's price for licensing her movies is very high, and it seems Shout has given up negotiating with her. I suppose the situation could change when she passes away, but I'd feel rather silly hoping for an old woman to die just so I can pay 8 bucks to watch robots laugh at a werewolf movie.
In conclusion, I've already purchased all the movies available on the Gizmoplex (I got most of them in a Kickstarter reward package), and the 31 that aren't available there can be obtained by, ahem, other means. So it's a great time to be an MST3K fan, and I'm still amazed how easy it is to watch the show nowadays.
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Thank you for tagging me @swoljarjar
Favorite Color: Royal blue, emerald green, golden yellow, crimson & scarlet
Currently reading: more like currently writing amirite? srsly
Last song: Hold My Hand, Hold My Heart by the Chantrellines
Last movie: last month, Lord of the Rings trilogy
Last series: I drew a blank on this until I remembered I had MST3K "Agent for H.A.R.M." on in the background while I did some needlework earlier this week
Current Craving: I'm good right now, thanks
Tea or coffee: coffee in the morning, decaf iced tea in the afternoon
Currently working on: I got the lemon curd made, the meringues are in the oven, the lemon cake will be up next, I just finished 2 more Christmas ornaments for 2024 and I'm on track to make the last 3 (of 12) today, which'll be nice, then play some Fallout 76 and also I'm writing in between all of these things
No pressure tags: @bokatan @bleumanouche @the-lastcall @galaxycunt @gayafsatan @darkfire1177@happyhappysparkle @throwbackjoe @fuzzyizmit
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Seeing Crow with legs is the most horrifying ever.
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Crow T. Robot: “You know, women can multi-task while they’re making love.”
Mike Nelson (mumbling disgruntledly): “I know that.”
Crow turns and stares at Mike.
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Today's read: The Comic Galaxy of Mystery Science Theater 3000. Today's episode: Agent from H.A.R.M. Very excited to dig into this analysis of each season. MST3K + academia = 💖💖💖 #book #bookstagram #bookstagrammer #ilovebooks #mysterysciencetheater3000 #mst3k #academia #drinks #floral #mikenelson #joelrobinson #tomservo #crowtrobot #gypsy #cambot
#gypsy#bookstagrammer#book#mst3k#tomservo#bookstagram#mikenelson#joelrobinson#crowtrobot#ilovebooks#mysterysciencetheater3000#floral#cambot#drinks#academia
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"Well, they're out of fumar, now what do we do?" #MST3K Season 8 Episode 15: Agent for H.A.R.M. #MyNameIsPrince (at Hopkins, Minnesota)
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