#moiraine’s going through it I want to give her a hug :(((

[everywaythatmatters]

Wheel of time season two is so fun so far oh my god the actors are absolutely killing it!!!! I adore Dónal Finn’s Mat and the weaves look amazing and Rand wearing the red coat and literally everything about Egwene and Elayne and Nynaeve is just sooooo good

[suckerforcate]

Left Behind

Pairing: Moiraine Sedai/Reader

Word Count: 2020

Warning: implied sexual activity

Summary: Moiraine left for the Dragon Reborn without saying goodbye or an explanation. Three years later she's back in the Tower.

A/n: I know it's been a long time since I've posted, but a lot happened. In Uni and my personal life, so I didn't have too much time. I'm sorry. I hope you like it. Request: @lovequinnin (I hope its kind of like you wanted it <3)

■----------------------------------------■

You rounded a corner in the Tower and suddenly stood right in front of Lan. For a dreadful second you just stared at him before slowly walking backwards around the corner and fleeing.

If Lan was here, Moiraine wasn't far.

Everything inside of you screamed to go to her. To ask how she'd been, hug her, kiss her. But she had hurt you once, and you didn't want her to do it again. Even after three years, it still hurt. Every day. Every moment. You wouldn't be able to live through that a second time. It would break you, completely and irrevocably. So you just kept your distance.

Which was harder than it sounded. The Tower was big, but not that big. And being a part of the brown Ajah, sitting in the library all day definitely didn't help, when Moiraine needed something from the Library every day.

The first day it was inconvenient, but it wasn't unusual. Everyone needed to go to the library sometimes. The encounter was awkward but bearable. She left as fast as she had come. You barely looked at her, politely but coldly giving her the book she needed. Politely but coldly asking if she needed anything else. And politely but coldly saying goodbye, turning around and going back to work.

The second day it was simply annoying. You dreaded seeing her more often just because she needed a book. You didn't really look up, but just the way she walked, her voice, her presence was enough to make your heart ache.

The fifth day you started to get suspicious. She had come every day for the past five days and everyday it seemed as if she needed a different book. All on topics, that weren't related in any way. It was unusual for Moiraine, she was organised, structured. It didn't fit her way of working.

On the morning of the seventh day you decided to talk to her about it. It was absolutely silly. This game made you go crazy. It was like she wanted to see you hurt. But on this day, for the first time in a week, she didn't come.

Not in the morning, not in the afternoon and not in the evening. It was already dark outside when you left the library, you had stretched your work, secretly hoping she would still come. But she hadn't, and that nearly hurt more than seeing her.

You strolled through the tower absent-mindedly, thinking about Moiraine. You were fighting with yourself. Your heart longed to see her, your brain screamed at you to stay away. To protect yourself, protect your heart.

Apparently the wheel decided to make that decision for you.

As you strolled down the corridor, on your way back to your room, you bumped into someone. You looked up and started an apology, that immediately got stuck in your throat as you saw the face of the person you had run into. It was Moiraine. Of course it was, who else would it be?

You stuttered out a few words, more like sounds, before taking a step back, as you suddenly realised how close you were. You pulled yourself together and straightened up a bit. You dared to look at her, but avoided her eyes. You knew that her eyes would always break you.

"Moiraine." You simply said, voice steady even though you felt your hands tremble slightly.

You saw the corners of her lips rise slightly, her eyes searching for yours.

"(Y/n)." She said softly. You could hear a hint of hope in her voice, a hint of...longing?

"Can I help you?" Your voice was icier than you had intended, but you couldn't pull back anymore. Her smile faded and her shoulders sank just a little bit. Gently she sighed.

"Please, can we talk?" She asked you, voice steady as always. Like it didn’t mean anything to her, at all. You stared at her, speechless. Her voice was steady, so steady she had nearly fooled you. But, just nearly. You sensed how desperate, how helpless she was. Even though she had no right to be. She had no right to be hurt, when she had been the one who had hurt you.

Your mouth opened and closed, your eyes widened a little. You couldn't find the words. So you grabed her arm and pulled her a few metres down the corridor, opened the door of your room and pulled her inside. Thinking about it now, she had probably went to your room earlier, hadn't found you and had just been leaving when you had bumped into her.

"You want to talk? Ok, let's talk." You said, voice filled with rage. Rage that you desperately hoped would hide your pain, would shove your tears down. It was a thin line between rage and hurt.

"(Y/n)..." She started but you harshly cut her off.

"No, you have no right to talk right now. Even coming to the library every single day is just outrageous. You just left. Three years ago, you left. You were just gone one day and never said a word. No letter, no message, no explanation." The words burst out of you, they'd been hidden inside of you for so long. All the hurt, the confusion and the anger just spilled out of you.

You could see the surprise on Moiraine's face, she steped back a little and tried to say something, but you just rambled on. Giving her no room for answers and explanations.

"You left me behind, like all those times together meant nothing to you. Like I meant nothing to you." You abruptly stopped talking as you saw Moiraine's eyes getting wet, her cheeks redden slightly, and her whole body slightly collapsed in on itself.

You wanted to go on, wanted to shout at her, wanted to make her feel everything she had made you feel. But your stupid heart betrayed you, it still beat for her. No words left your mouth. You simply stood there, like you were petrified. After a second you moved again, took a few steps back and sank into a chair.

You rest your head on your hands and looked down, trying hard to keep the tears down. In vain. Just a few slipped out and rolled down your cheeks, but you didn't let Moiraine see them.

You heard her getting closer, slowly, carefully. She stopped, and sighed. As she started to talk, her voice was soft like honey and strong. But it was wavering a bit, just a tiny bit. But you noticed. You'd always notice.

"I'm sorry. I had to leave, it was for your own safety. I couldn't say anything, the Amyrlin Seat forbid me to-..." you cut her off again, though not nearly as harshly as before.

"Since when do you listen to the Amyrlin Seat?" It sounded bitter, but teary.

"Since it meant protecting you." She said. It's raw, full of emotion. Different to what she usually sounds like, and it made you look up. As if to check, if it's still Moiraine who's talking. But it was.

You sighed, the exhaustion of the day and the tears stronger than your rage. For the first time in three years you thought, that maybe she really hadn't meant to hurt you. That maybe she never stopped loving you.

Your voice is quiet, thin as you speak. It's wavering and doesn't sound like your voice. Even to you, it's foreign. You looked down again, not having enough strength to look at her while talking.

"I didn't need your protection. I needed your love. When you left, you took a part of me with you. A part of me I never got back." Your eyes were glued to the floor and a tear falls to the ground. You felt her before you saw her.

She had kneeled down in front of you and gently grabbed your chin between her fingers to lift your head. You tried to turn away, to not lock eyes with her, but her grip was strong. It held you in place, it forced you to look at her.

You saw hurt, pain, regret but most importantly love. Love, like you hadn't seen in three years. Her hand wandered to your cheek and cupped it, softly stroking your skin, wiping a few tears away.

"(Y/n)" she quietly breathed your name. Her name on your lips had always sounded like a promise. Until she broke that promise.

"I'm so sorry for the way I hurt you. It's never what I wanted. Lan had said I shouldn't...but I couldn't risk it. Couldn't risk your safety." The words sounded sincere, like the truth. It sounded, which almost hurt the most, a lot like something Moiraine would do. She had always estimated the value of love far too low. Even if it was her own love, maybe especially when it was her own love.

"Don't you think that should have been my decision?" You asked sadly, smiling bitterly, nearly accusing. She sighed, closing her eyes for a moment. When she opened them, there was determination in them, strength.

"I knew that you would have wanted to come with us. But that wasn't possibly, I couldn't have forgiven myself if... If you'd been hurt." You tilted your head to the side a little, like a curious puppy. Didn't she know? That you would have died for her. You blinked a few times, trying to find fitting words.

"I would have," you replied softly, "I love you."

The tense surprised you both. Of course, you knew that you still loved her, you just hadn't meant to admit that. But she looked at you like she had expected you to hate her. To never feel anything good for her again. Didn't she know? That you'd always love her.

No one dared to say anything, as if it would break the spell. As if it would catapult you back to reality, like this was a dream. You felt her hand still on your cheek, warm and tingling. She doesn't acknowledge it, but she doesn't move it away either.

"Still?" She asked with a thin voice, not much louder than a whisper. Didn't she know?

"Of course. Nothing you could do would ever make me stop loving you."  You saw a tear slowly roll down her cheek. She sucked it up and looked away, fighting against the tears. She slightly shook her head in denial.

"I do. I'll always love you, Moiraine." You gently directed her face back to look at you and dry her tear. Your thumb softly stroked over her lips and slightly parted them. Moiraine's eyes closed and she breathed in shakily.

Slowly, carefully you leaned forward and captured her lips in a kiss. It's a soft kiss, short and careful. It's a question. And Moiraine answerd.

She pressed against your lips, more desperately than you, it nearly felt guilty. Like she wanted to apologise, make up for lost time. Show you, that she cared. That she loved and longed.

You're a little startled by her kiss, but soon you pulled her closer, held her and forgave her. You started taking of her clothes, stood up and draged her to the bed. It was messy, hastily and chaotic. But it was all you needed. Her. By your side.

"I'll come with you." You breathed out quietly against her hair. You were intertwined, under the sheets, arm in arm.

"No, you don't even know where I'm going or what I'm doing." She protested, her voice almost sounded desperate. Desperate to protect you, to keep you safe.

"You won't leave me here again. I'm coming with you." Your voice is steady, calm. You knew you would win the argument, you usually did.

"It's dangerous."

"I don't care. If you'd asked, I would have come with you three years ago." The blunt truth hung in the air. She hadn't left you a choice back then, she had decided for you. You wouldn't let her do that again, and she knew it.

"I'm sorry. We lost so much time together." She whispered softly, and you pulled her closer into your embrace. You placed a soft kiss on her head.

"We'll make up for it."

[butterflydm]

More WoT s2 thoughts based on the new pics

The last time I really speculated on anything WoT S2 was ten months ago, so it's very exciting to have new thoughts! So, thoughts based on the new pictures:

The first photo contains a lot of exciting new information: Ishy openly working with the Seanchan! In the book, this was represented as more of a metaphysical tie (as Rand fought against Ishamael in the sky, his battle mimicked the fight going on against the Seanchan on the ground) but Ishy being an ally or aligned with the Seanchan right away is very intriguing (and it makes me wonder: are we sure that Semirhage was one of the figurines represented by the prayer statuettes? Maybe Ishamael is taking over her storyline and we actually are going to get Mesaana in the White Tower; or it could be that the reins on the Seanchan get handed over to Semirhage in future seasons).

I love the Seanchan Look so much. The Teal/Rust color combination works really well for them and their look is just so unlike any of the other looks we've seen in the show. I love how Ishy's collar feels like it's evoking the same ribbed vibes as the Suroth's shoulder-gear. And we have a good look at a Voice here, potentially (since she has no long nails to indicate that she's of the Blood) -- not Alwhin, since she was chosen as Suroth's Voice post-Falme, iirc.

Loial being dressed up behind them is also very intriguing, and I wonder if he's going to be one of the ways that we'll find out more details about how Seanchan culture works through Loial's potential conversations with Suroth. There's so much information in this first still! Very exciting!

The Lan photo doesn't really give us any new information but he Looks Great. <3

The Moiraine photo has some neat things going on: Cairhienin fashion! Implied confirmation that Moiraine & Lan will be with Rand in Cairhien specifically (so my guess is that Verin will be introduced in Perrin's plotline and travel along with him). I love the belt, and we have the high collar for Cairhienin modesty, and the kesiera. It's also a Great Look.

My guesses for Egwene & Nynaeve is that they are both at the White Tower -- Egwene is doing some novice chores while Nynaeve is stripping down (maybe only to her shift and not all the way?) for the test to become Accepted.

The Mat photo is the same view that I think we got of him in the teaser trailer but he looks so sad! I want to give him hugs!

The Rand one is fun because it looks like he's already done his Cairhieinin arc, because that is a very fancy white collar that he has on underneath that cloak. So I think this is him entering Falme (I feel like the background also tracks for that).

Perrin with Aviendha and... I think the guy in the background is Masema? Aviendha is veiled and ready for a fight but Perrin does NOT look ready for a fight at all. Is this also Falme? This isn't when Loial was taken, because I think we saw that moment in the teaser trailer and it looked like it was out in a more rural-ish area, though that might be an angle issue.

People we did not get any hints of: no Elayne! I want my girl! But we also didn't get any hints of Padan Fain, which is intriguing. No Alanna or Min or Siuan this time.

But very exciting! September 1st! So excited to finally have a date!

[satashiiwrites]

Wheel of Time Season 1 thoughts

Just trying to get a few thoughts down… with the caveat that I’m like a tenth of the way through a re-listen of the Eye of the World and it’s been more than a decade since i last read the book so my memory of exact events in the books is.. eh… kinda patchy to non-existent in parts.  Putting beneath a cut for spoilers.

Rand—I disagree with those that find him bland.  If anything, knowing what he’s in for later assuming they follow the books, I just want to hug him the first time he shows up with that fuzzy sweater that I wanna steal because it looks so warm and cozy… yeah.  I think they were spot on with their casting. Josha is perfect and vulnerable and I can totally believe him as Rand. His chemistry with Egwene is believable and he makes it work.  His chemistry with both Perrin and Mat is also fantastic.  Best line is “If I wanted a man I could do better.”  I just lost it at that line the first time.  

Ugh that sweater.  You’re such a softie in it and I want to cuddle you Rand.  The story is not going to be kind to you going forward.  You just wanna raise sheep and have a family.  The world is not kind to those called dragon. 

Mat—Matrim my beloved.  Mat has been my favorite of the entire series since before I graduated high school. Barney Harris nailed him perfectly in ways I didn’t expect.  I’m sad that he had to be recast but I’ll give the new guy some time to try and fill Barney’s shoes because that’s going to be a difficult task.  I would say there is some obvious clunky-ness going on in the last few episodes because of this casting problem and when I saw Perrin sitting so close to the horn I just about had a conniption fit until I realized he wasn’t going to touch the darned thing.

Anyways.  I hope they do not lean too hard into the possibility of Mat being a Darkfriend next season as that strikes me as completely against his character arc but we’ll see.  Amazon please don’t make him pull an Edmond. I am very very curious how things are going for him since Moiraine set the red Ajah on him. 

I’m just going to be sitting in my corner waving my tiny Cauthor flag until we get the second season.  I never shipped them until the tv series but whoo boy do I do now.

Perrin—of the three main boys I have to admit he’s never been my favorite in the books. Which is odd since he’s got the whole wolf thing going on he should be exactly my type of character (It’s probably because I’m just that big of a mat fan and Faile… yeah jealousy isn’t my favorite character trait). I will say that I think the actor (Marcus Rutherford) is pretty good but he’s just not completely hit his stride with Perrin yet for me. His scenes with the Travelers and Egwene are fantastic as were the first episode in the Two Rivers but the wolf scenes with the Children of the Light and the final episode were just a tad off somehow to me.  

That being said I think a lot of setup is being done and he was doing a lot of heavy lifting at times.  I’m still kinda shrugging on the whole love triangle setup with Egwene tho. Also kinda shrugging about the whole wife storyline which I think everyone agrees was a bad case of fridging.

Egwene—Confession time.  I don’t like most of the women that RJ wrote.  I just don’t.  I was at a stage in my life where women being described as stubborn and calling men woolheads just wasn’t… I don’t wanna tug on my braid and stamp my feet. That being said this isn’t that Egwene or Nynaeve (who we’ll get to shortly). Madeleine Madden has believable chemistry with both Rand and Perrin but I actually think it’s better with Perrin.  This love triangle is just… hilarious to me. I think her storyline changes have added more organic-ness to her story arc as well as made her a more sympathetic character than her book counterpart and more humane.  I stand by my opinion that RJ had some weirdness when it came to writing female characters but I think the tv series has smoothed some of that out and given them… i can’t find the right word… life?  Normalacy?  I’m not sure here.  Either way I’d say that the tv series is an improvement in Egwene’s character and her story arc over my memory of the books. 

The way we’re introduced to Egwene in the tv series is fantastic and really sets a different tone.  I loved this part of the first episode.  

Nynaeve—I’ve always been on the neutral side of her character in the books to slightly disliked in the earlier ones but then she got with Lan and I rethought a few things. I do think she much improved as time went on but I’d also argue that the tv series has softened her edges a lot compared to how she was originally written (again may be my faulty memory as it’s been a while). Zoe Robins is fantastic as an actress and I think she’s improved upon the character. 

I am sad that I feel like her romance with Lan is being pushed to develop faster. Zoe has great chemistry with the rest of the cast and it shows in her performance.  Her stubbornness is pure Nynaeve and is perfect. 

I’m not sure what to think about the whole burning in the last episode—I’ll probably still be chewing on it by the time season 2 comes around and we find out how she’s doing and if it affected her ability to channel. 

Moiraine—what is there to say?  Rosamund Pike has been possessed by Moiraine Damodred’s spirit or is it the other way around?  She is at the peak of her art and the vulnerability and fear in the penultimate episode was fantastic. Moiraine will always be one of my favorite fictional characters and Rosamund blew it out of the park. Her scenes in the last episode, the penultimate, or any time she was with Siuan was just chef’s kiss perfect.  I cannot imagine another actress as Moiraine. 

The changes made to show more of the politics of the White Tower and to get away from Rand’s POV in the book are fine in my opinion and add depth to the show. You have someone as good as Rosamund you should use her to give your story the teeth it needs to have emotional payoff.  And payoff it does.  Her relationship with Siuan is handled beautifully and that mention of Elaida and how she learned to channel at will… i got goosebumps. 

A thousand kudos to Rosamund Pike.  She should get all the acting awards. Her refusal to let Rand go down into the eye alone was beautiful. 

Lan:  Ah my favorite warder and king of a lost kingdom.  I don’t remember Malkier being mentioned so early in the booksbut I’m fine with the show stuffing as much lore as they can into every minute.  The WOT books were almost 4.5 million words and there’s only so much screen time. 

I have resisted the urge to use a certain bathtime gif here….but I feel like he got the most clothing optional shots of all the characters in season one. 

As I said above… I’m not perfectly happy with how rushed the development of his relationship with Nynaeve is/feels but I do think the actors have great chemistry.  Daniel Henney is not exactly how I pictured Lan back when I was reading the books but now he is Lan to me.  He has great subtlety and understated intensity that works for Lan as a character.  His platonic relationship with Moiraine is beautifully portrayed. 

I’m not going to go into all the other casting decisions but in general I’d say they were altogether A++. I did not have one casting choice that I hated or didn’t think worked.  Fal Dara was fantastic and I loved the small cultural touches as was Siuan’s childhood sendoff to the Tower. The confrontation at the end at the Eye was marvelously acted and I cannot wait to see more of Lews, Ishamael or the other Forsaken. I loved the brief show of how advanced the technology was before the breaking and I know some people are probably losing their shit over it (hey it worked here vs it was a disaster in Shannara). 

Changes I’m neutral about: Skipping Camelyn and the entire road journey except for a few chosen bits was obviously a time decision—I get it and I’m okay with it but I’m curious how Elayne, Gawayn and Galahad are all going to be introduced (please don’t make Mat encounter them by himself).   But this also means we haven’t met Elaida yet. 

I also know there’s a lot of changes that had to be made because of Mat’s actor… which I suppose I’m going to give them time to work this out in season 2.  I’m giving them the benefit of the doubt but again I really really don’t want to see Mat having a complete darkfriend arc. Let’s lean into the way that Rand is defending him and the fears that he might be able to channel—which I don’t think the show has ruled out for him.   This could be a very interesting thing to explore.

I’m also very curious as to where Rand is going.  The show seemed to imply that he’s headed towards the Aiel Waste…. Which okay. I’m going to read the entire series if i can before next season (because I’m also impatient about remembering what happens next). I’m not against the changes necessarily but instead find them interesting.  

To summarize: I think that for an adaptation of such a huge book series that spans 14 books and millions of words we’re doing a fantastic job.  The actors are all well cast and the show runners obviously love their story. There’s going to always be a few rough things or stuff that unexpectedly has to be worked around but so far we’re on the right track.  I’d recommend the series to anyone who enjoys long form storytelling and fantasy.

[zahri-melitor]

New Spring

Or I guess its other name is “Moiraine is extremely put upon and narrative causality comes for Lan”. Or “two young adults determinedly run away from being royalty”.

Yeah I jumped over here as the allure of the prequel was too big, I’ll be back with The Shadow Rising next.

1. Moiraine buying herself a horse the first second she’s allowed? I’m cackling. Purehearted horse girl.

2. “[Moiraine] had never thought she would dare give an Aes Sedai answer to the Amyrlin Seat.” Oh sweet innocent young Moiraine, you’re just getting practice in.

3. Also yes I noticed this is the Quite Gay Book as I have been promised.

4. Quite a LOT of bed sharing going on there, Siuan and Moiraine. And that dressing scene afterwards can easily be read as you weren’t wearing anything while sleeping.

5. Siuan telling Elayne and Egwene “corporal punishment then I’ll make you Accepted” is amusingly echoed in the “mice in Elaida’s bed” incident when Siuan and Moiraine became Aes Sedai but I cannot figure out what the repeat means. The strongest Aes Sedai get themselves into the most trouble?

5. Automatically my favourite book in the series so far as it has a dress shop scene and the politics of clothing. There are few types of scene I love more than a woman, with a dressmaker/seamstress, shopping and feeling pretty as they do so.

6. Moiraine being like “I give in, dress me however you want” ahahaha there speaks a noble used to court dress and not getting to have choices.

7. Rand: tossing invites into the fireplace with no understanding of what he’s communicating. Moiraine: tossing invites into the fireplace fully cognisant of the danger as YOU CAN’T MAKE ME SUN QUEEN, DO WHAT I WANT.

8. Moiraine: yes these dresses look hot on Siuan, confirmed, argument and money well spent.

9. Jordan you keep having women fold their arms UNDER their boobs and please, that’s not comfortable, that’s basically hugging your sides for comfort, why must dude writers be so bad at this.

10. “Her bed remained an ocean of froth that made Siuan giggle with delight”. Uh huh. Sea metaphor seen and noted in this (among other things).

11. “Wearing this dress and embarrassing myself is penance” ok yes go on and keep telling on yourself like that.

12. Moiraine: I am an adult! Making adult decisions! I can look after myself! Cadsuane: you are tiny babby, please make sure this baby has supervision she could hurt herself.

13. Lan and Moiraine! Trying to out stubborn each other! Two stiff necked, dramatic, petty, arrogant nobles who stand on their dignity. The combined power that will aggravate everyone else in the future directed specifically at making the other miserable.

14. Moiraine: we can take them on Lan: it’s four v fifty. We can’t Moiraine: just watch me Lan: no really it’s not going to work. We’ll just chase them off Moiraine (sulkily, 48 hours later): I could have taken them

15. Moiraine being shocked Siuan would seduce a MAN for information, wow is she ever queer the poor baby

16. I’m enjoying how the last third of this book is basically the set up for a romance except Lan and Moiraine just get bonded instead then spend 20 years spying together.

Ok, that one was just FUN. Both Young!Moiraine and Young!Lan are absolute idiots but hey everyone has to start somewhere. And yes, as I was informed, it is indeed QUITE GAY and Jordan has some obvious kinks showing. (The book kept going “and now we all get naked for this ritual” and I’m side-eyeing him going “you sound like Gardner”)

Theory: Lan and Moiraine don’t need to speak to each other much as they spent the entire first few years of their relationship just channeling all their frustration, anger and rage through the bond at the other rather than swearing as they were undercover so often, and they got so good at reading the other that when they finally worked out how to work in tandem they just kept silently emoting at each other. Like clearly. These two never sat down and talked through their problems out loud.

[xdragonsofavaloria]

The Deal Not Taken-Drabble

“Kassandros…Kassandros…”

The Black Dragon King stopped working as soon as he heard that familiar sing-song voice. That familiar power…could feel her fingertips trailing along his shoulderblades…with just a simple flicker of his power, he pushed her away from him, only to hear her dark laughter in the air before it changed into a beautiful woman, with silver hair that fell to her shoulders, and that air of darkness and madness all rolled into one. “Misericordia…” Kassandros growled the moment her true form appeared.

Wearing a black deep v dress with golden patterns on the bodice that matched the color of her eyes, Misericordia Everbleed, Queen of the Dark Lands, gave the Dragon a smile that almost matched with her cold beauty. “Kassandros…my darling. How long has it been since we’ve been in the same room?” she asked in a soft voice. She walked back over to the desk and stood next to him. “How long has it been since you felt…” her hand touched the ridge of his shoulder and slowly dipped down to his neck, placing her lips on it, “the touch of a woman, hm?”

The question made him rub his forehead. “Why are you here, woman?” he asked with a growl again, turning to face her. “Haven’t you done enough to me?”

“You know what I want,” she purred. “I want you to be mine. Make me Queen. I will warm your cold bed-“

“Stop it.” He whispered. “Don’t speak of things that won’t come true. I will never-“

“Mate again?” Misericordia said, pulling back from him and walked back around the desk. “Or fuck again, which one is it? I always thought your beauty could bring most of the women to the yard…but then, all you care about lately is your kingdom, your daughter and that little brat she calls a son. How old is he know? Five, six? Still hanging on to mother dearest?”

He hated it that she knew about Cassie’s son, a bright, six year old boy that always hung around him or his cousin, Simba, and was growing each and every day. And Simba, the once happy boy had now grown into a teenager-and he was good with both magic and bows and arrows, his dragon form as black as his and his grandfathers. It would be a shame since Phoenix wouldn’t be able to shift into a dragon himself, since he was sadly a human. But he would be a crown prince-it had been a long time since Avaloria had a crown prince-and Simba would take Alektryon’s title and would be a prince.

“You never answered my question,” Kassandros asked. “Why are you here?”

“To make a deal.”

A deal…that doesn’t sound good. “And…what’s this deal?” he asked slowly.

Misericordia thought about it, tapping her chin. She smiled gleefully before she spoke again. “Your daughter shall marry my son, then she won’t be lonely anymore. The boy can have a father, finally, and you-“

“No. Hell no.”

“Excuse me?” Misericordia thought she didn’t hear him right. Was he refusing her? “What did you just say?”

“I said…no.” Did he really think that he’ll give up his only daughter to the bastard that pretended to be her guard, only to betray her? “I’m not giving my daughter up to your son. If I could, I could kill him again so he won’t be around her ever again.” At those words, his eyes turned a flaming orange color, the sign of the ancient black dragon.

That only made Misericordia recoil back from fear-the only time she was scared of him. “You will say yes to me, Kassandros,” she snarled, the dark tendrils of her magic starting to surround her. “You won’t resist me soon. I know you will.”

“Get out of here, Misericoridia,” he snarled to the Dark Queen. “Come here again, and I’m going to kill you.”

The only thing she did was laugh as she left Earlington Castle, leaving Kassandros to lean back in his seat, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath.

Dinner had come around, and everyone was in the huge dining hall, eating and talking about their day. Kassandros had been quiet the whole meal, not speaking to anything until he felt a tug on his arm. Turning, he looked into the brown human eyes of his only human grandson, Phoenix. “Yes, dii grandson?”

“Grandpa sad,” Phoenix said, holding out his dinner roll. “Present for…for grandpa.”

A smile broke out at the dinner roll in his tiny hands. The thought of Phoenix being Chase’s stepson would be horrible for the sweet, kind boy, who was getting bigger and brighter each day. He would never know the sweet, kind life he knows now since Cassie brought him home and raised her herself, having a nursemaid assigned to him and also being a good mother as much as she could. How she balanced being a mother and a Queen at the same time worried the old dragon for a moment, but then as she figured it out, having sleepless nights when he was sick with him, and would come around and be with him each time.

Taking the roll, he hugged his grandson before looking around sneakily and passed him his part of the apple pie. “Don’t tell monah, hm?” Kassandros said with a smile and a wink, and Phoenix nodded, going back to his seat and started to eat the cake. Alektryron looked over to Phoenix with his two plates of apple pie, grinning.

“What?” Phoenix asked between bites. “Uncle want pie?”

“Uncle doesn’t want pie,” Alek answered with a chuckle, taking a sip of his ale. “Just that…Grandpa did the same to me and your monah when we were younglings. And Uncle may have done the same to your cousin when he was little.”

That made Simba snap his head towards his father. “I’m sorry-you did what?” he asked. At only fifteen years old, Simba was already a really good hunter and magic user, preferring his bows and arrows. Only a couple years ago he shifted into his black dragon form to take out a couple demons, but never again, only for emergencies. But ever since then, Simba became the leader of the rangers-at the young age of fifteen!-and had learned how to use the sword and the ax as well. But when he was little, he was always running around with his cat Jinx and always climbing things. “I don’t remember you giving me a-“ before he could finish that statement, his mouth was covered by Alek’s big hand, shushing him.

Cassie looked up at the four of them, confused. “Um…is everything…” she asked, watching her nephew try and bite down on Alek’s hand, and her father and son hiding secret smiles on their faces. She chuckled, though a part of her wished that she had someone to share it with for the rest of her life. She was quite happy, but after all the councilors begged and pleaded with her to mate, to find a King, Cassie just couldn’t do it. No one, she thought, will love her as much as Sam did. And now that he wasn’t here, Cassie felt like she couldn’t move on.

“Everything’s otay!” Phoenix told her, removing his mouth to give her a smile before going back to his pies. That made her chuckle as she turned back to her father-and saw that small, sad look on his face. A worried look flashed across the Queen’s face as she looked at him, but then sighed and nodded, having a feeling that they’ll talk about it later.

~

“She..she wanted me to marry…” Cassie blanched after listening to Kassandros relay the whole conversation he had with Misericordia. The thought of the evil fae Chase even being her husband-and even touching her-made her skin crawl. “I’m not marrying him. I’m not even ready to marry! Father-tell me that you refused this…this horrible proposal!”

He nodded. “I did,” Kassandros told her. “I couldn’t picture him being the father of Phoenix, you know that.”

“Oh gods…” Shakily, she placed a hand on her lips. Just the thought of Phoenix actually calling that…that fae…”No.”

“But…Cassie. You know I love you, and I want you to be happy…” he started, though knowing that rushing her wasn’t going to help anyone. “How long will it be since Sam passed?” he asked slowly.

Silence filled the room at the question. He hadn’t dared ask the question because he didn’t know how she would react. Angry? Upset? He didn’t know that he was holding his breath when she said, “A hundred years.”

A hundred years.

She’d been morning Sam for nearly a hundred years, and had not once felt anything else for nearly all the men that had come to the castle and ask for her hand? When Phoenix came into her life, she tossed it away, just so she can be a mother, and had turned her head from the many men that wanted to court her. He had a feeling that she never healed from missing her Sam, and the thought of marriage…downright frightens her. “I’ll never rush you into marriage, you know that,” he told her softly. “But one day, Cassie…you’ll find it again. The same feelings you felt for Sam will come back to you once you find love again.”

She shook her head. “No it won’t,” she muttered. No one will call her his depraved dragoness anymore-no one will hold her like he did. No one will make her feel that way anymore. She’ll be as old as her father and never know a touch of a man ever again. “I’ll ever feel that way again. Even if you tell me a thousand times.”

Kassandros sighed as he got up and gently kissed his strong daughter on the cheek. “You say that now,” he told her as he started to leave her office, “But one day, my girl, you’ll fall in love again. That spark will come back to you. Love doesn’t go away because someone died.” And yet, with those words, he knew they were true. What she was experiencing is what he and Alek went through when their loves passed on-shutting down the emotion of love so they won’t feel it again, until they find the love of their lives.

Cassie waited till her father left, and stared into the fire. Tears came to her eyes as she shook her head. “I will never fall in love…ever again.” She whispered, turning away and called on Moiraine so she could go to bed.

[veliseraptor]

so it turns out that I have a lot of thoughts about a memory of light and I’m about halfway through so here, have the first half of lise’s thoughts: a memory of light edition

the entire scene with the council on the Merrilor Fields was so my jam, I love council scenes okay, and watching Amyrlin Egwene and Dragon Rand square off was fabulous. 

also with bonus ending up yelling “woolhead” at each other in a room full of royalty. you can take the kid out of the Two Rivers

BITCHES MOIRAINE’S BACK

I mean she was back last book but now she’s really back, and like. possibly the best part was Nynaeve giving Moiraine a hug because, you know, reasons

the bit where the Great Trees grow and it’s...pretty clearly Rand’s doing made me think “and Rand, he makes the flowers grow” to the tune of “A Little Fall of Rain” so there’s that

Elan Moridin and Rand still have the gayest ages-spanning rivalmance in all of Wheel of Time, I’m just saying

a little annoyed about how the Black Tower plot got taken over by what I rather uncharitably think of as “Brandon Sanderson’s OC”, we don’t get any Taim or Logain POV but we get this dude? smdh

the Mat POV chapters (the change in his narration/character) are still grating on me, but I’m so endeared by Mat/Tuon as a pairing that I’m almost willing to forget it.

also I just love Tuon so much. hanging out in the garden in the middle of the night, just practicing her hand to hand combat maneuvers, yeah girl

Rand and Tuon meeting, take two! and this time it goes so much better.

also omg Rand and Mat meeting each other for the first time in eleven books and ribbing each other and just being. oh, boys. I do have to say I like the way in the last few books that things are coming full circle - characters coming back to their roots. it’s very thematically appropriate.

surprise Demandred! surprise Sharan channelers! I guess the groundwork for that was laid earlier but...eh. also I am a little uncomfortable with the ~exotic~ description of the Sharans, particularly given that a number of them are described as dark skinned. which...at least they aren’t the only dark skinned people in this series? but still.

Gawyn being like “da fuq” about finding out that Rand and Galad are half brothers

which, also like, what I would not give to see a conversation between Rand and Galad, it would be so awkward. into it

Gawyn sitting in the dark playing with his Bloodknives. you are an idiot Gawyn, I’m sorry but it is true

I feel like this book and the last book could have been compressed at least a little. like, the epic scope of the Last Battle is very much conveyed, but I’m not here for descriptions of battles, I’m here for interpersonal drama. but that may be just me

zen Rand is making me smile. zen Rand giving away all of his possessions in preparation for his death is making me cry.

I do enjoy all the people like “Rand look maybe you should put possibly a little more thought into the possibility of being alive”

Min joining the Seanchan club is just one more thing that makes me wish, so hard, for that teased post-series Mat and Tuon thing that will never, ever happen (and I mean I wouldn’t want it to without Jordan writing it but still) because Min hanging with Seanchan royalty and going toe to toe with Tuon is yes, thanks

other thing about Rand that is more general than just this book (but comes up very firmly with the Dragon’s Peace) is his determination to leave a positive legacy. it started much earlier, most notably with the school in Cairhien, but he has this deep desire to leave something good behind in spite of everything telling him that he’s going to Break Everything and

oh, Rand. you’re a good kid at heart. a total fucking mess but a good kid.