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lovelyladyabsinthewrites · 4 months ago

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From the Ashes Pt.51

Pairing(s): Pairing(s): Rhaegar Targaryen x Lannister!Reader, one-sided!Jaime Lannister x Lannister!Reader, Jaime Lannister x Cersei Lannister

Warnings: slow burn fic, changing povs, Jaime POV, Cersei POV, just to let everyone know we're officially caught up with the story :), because of work and school I don't know when part 52 will be posted, but I'll definitely be working on it on my free time so bare with me!

Words: 7152

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18 Part 19 Part 20 Part 21

Part 22 Part 23 Part 24 Part 25 Part 26 Part 27 Part 28 Part 29 Part 30 Part 31 Part 32 Part 33 Part 34 Part 35 Part 36 Part 37 Part 38 Part 39 Part 40 Part 41 Part 42 Part 43 Part 44

Part 45 Part 46 Part 47 Part 48 Part 49 Part 50

“I’m sorry.” (Y/n) apologized to Jaime for the hundredth time.

“Again, I appreciate your apology. Don’t worry about it.” Jaime hummed while finishing off the bandage that wrapped around his forearm. “It’s not the first or last time. That’s just something you’re going to have to accept if you want to keep swordfighting.”

His sister frowned in response. Yes, she still desired to learn. The moment (y/n) recovered from being poisoned, she begged Jaime to become her instructor. There was no one more suited. Jaime was exceptional, nearing to supernatural, with a blade. He’d already made a name for himself in all of the Seven Kingdoms.

“You didn’t even flinch. Are you not scared of getting hurt?” She inquired.

Jaime took in the sight that was his sister. Sickness had sharply thinned her face but after a few months in Essos she appeared better than ever. Her cheeks had regained their fullness and even started getting freckles from her exposure to the harsh Essos sun. That day, (y/n) had even braided her long, blonde hair. Where previously it had nearly been a dull brown, again the sun picked out bright blonde highlights that had been hiding. Now there was a shimmer to her locks whenever the sun caught it in the right angle. (y/n) was more lovely than the day she returned to King's Landing to become Rhaegar's bride. In front of him was the smiling girl he wanted to protect with his life.

"No. I'm not scared of getting hurt. It's an occupational hazard that must be embraced. Scars like this will ultimately heal." He lifts up his arm as a demonstration. "I've had a lot worse than this scrape."

Her fingers gingerly brush against the bandage that had been tightly secured around the wound. "But it hurts though, doesn't it?"

Such a feather light touch warmed his arm. Not even Cersei had ever treated him so gently. (y/n) was made of pure kindness. In all honesty, Jaime hadn't wanted to teach her initially. He wanted his sister to maintain her sweetness. Fighting would definitely introduce her to a different side of not just life but herself. He didn't want her light to diminish which it certainly would after she killed someone for the first time.

"It does. In a fight though you can't focus on the pain. Instead you utilize it. It helps to ground you to reality and for me it fuels me to hurt my enemy like they have hurt me." Jaime attempts to explain. "Pain reminds me that I'm alive and what I'm fighting for."

Jaime cocked his head towards her. “What do you want to fight for, (y/n)?”

Her hand ran from the material of his bandage to his hand and she smiled up at him with tenderness. “Well for starters, I want to be able to protect myself so I’m not relying on you to defend me.”

“I don’t mind.”

She rolled her eyes. “You may not but I do. There might come a day where I won’t have you by my side.”

A part of him broke when she confided in him what she feared deep down inside.

She continued. “And I also want to be able to protect you too. I want to be able to have your back if you need protecting too.” Bashfully (y/n) cast her eyes to her smaller hand holding Jaime’s. “I know that you are an amazing swordsman and I may never become as good as you. But I want to try.”

Gods how he desired to embrace her, to lavish her coveted lips with a kiss. No one had ever said that they wanted to protect him. It was so endearing and had Jaime’s heart thudding loudly that it was all he could hear.

He didn’t fall into his want though.

Jaime merely smiles back at her and grips his fingers tighter against her’s. “You’ll get there, I’m sure. Because I’m going to help you.” ***

A hushed, urgent voice softly tugs at his conscious before Jaime opened his eyes. His room was still bathed in moonlight blue. Next to him, Tyrion is fearfully grabbing onto his arm. They would be leaving for Storm’s End in a couple of days. Excited for another sea voyage, Tyrion had already packed and set his bags in Jaime’s room. He’d also been feeling lonely since (y/n) left for the Shadowlands and found comfort sleeping next to his brother.

“Jaime. Jaime, something is going on outside.” Tyrion whispered, his face turned toward the door to his quarters.

Straining his ears, Jaime could hear what his young brother was talking about. Faintly muffled screams could be heard. Instantly kicking off his covers and leaping onto his feet, he grabbed his sword and the crescent shaped blade issued by the Fiery Hands.

“Stay in here and be quiet.”

“But-“

Jaime shoots him a silencing look that had Tyrion swallowing back whatever protest he was going to give.

“Get your sword and hide.”

Obediently Tyrion scampered from the bed to gather his sword. In an impressively fluid motion, Tyrion drops to the ground and rolls under the bed.

Satisfied and with a nod, Jaime leaves his room and follows the ever growing screams and pounding of many feet. Doors in the hallway he was running down were opening in response and occupants were also going to investigate.

Dread consumed him when he realized where it was coming from. He didn’t want it to be true.

A large crowd was gathered outside of Nuahlin’s room. The priestesses that were there had tears in their eyes and hands clasped over their mouths. Members of the guard and high ranking priests were already at the heart of it. At first Jaime didn’t recognize the person that was holding onto the corpse of Nuahlin. Without the headdress, he didn’t notice Ajda as he propped up Nuhalin’s body in his arms.

Undeniable sorrow made the old man’s bottom lip tremble as he spoke in Valyrian. Someone had mentioned to Jaime previously that Ajda and Nuahlin had grown up together and were extremely close. This was a piercing blow to the tyene (high ranking red priest). The broken expression on his face told Jaime that maybe the two were more than friends.

“Has someone alerted the High Priest?”

”Who would have done this?”

“This is damnable!”

Members of the Hand were getting into business of blocking entrance to thee corridor and ushering unnecessary individuals out. Yophiel was seen kneeling next to Ajda, a comforting hand on the old man's shoulder. Sirvart was on his other side whispering words of consolation to him.

“Ser Jaime.” A grave expression so foreign on Iyan’s face made the Tyroshi’s eyes darken. “I need you to go to the barracks and alert the others. Those who were on guard are already here. The others need to be on patrol around the temple and assure it’s secure.”

Nodding, he promptly makes his way through the temple and out to the back. Across the training grounds was the Fiery Hand barracks. Jaime had previously slept there before (y/n) left. Then he took up a room in the temple to keep a closer eye on Tyrion.

The sentries that were posted outside were accompanied by the orange glow from mounted torches in front of the barrack doors. Instantly, they straighten their form at the sight of Jaime. “We heard the noise. What’s going on?”

“Nuahlin has been murdered. We need the guards to secure the temple.” Jaime relayed the task.

Everyone acted quickly; no one took the death of Nuahlin lightly. There would be consequences to the murder of such a good man. Jaime assisted with whatever order he was given by Yophiel or Iyan who was acting as second in command. The High Priest and other tyene were investigating Nuahlin’s room for any clues as to what exactly may have happened.

Jaime made a point to check in on Tyrion and tell him what had transpired. Like many others, Tyrion was sad and couldn’t understand who in the temple could be the culprit.

Not until the peak of sunrise did Jaime finally make it down to the prison cells to verify a suspicion that was gnawing away at him. Since Dritan’s last incident with Ajda and Ninthalor, he’d been locked up below the temple. Jaime tried to dissuade himself from suspecting Dritan, but how could he not? Time and time again, Dritan proved to be a problem. He was like a rabid dog, foaming at the mouth and attempting to bite any one who got too close.

There he was though. Sitting on the dirt floor, he reminded Jaime of the red-headed darkin. Inniros had been in the same situation as Dritan not too long ago.

Dritan watched him carefully, his dark eyes glinting against the sconces that offered the only light in the rudimentary dungeon. The Hands outside of the jail doors had already told him Dritan had not moved. Warned him about Dritan's foul temper.

The hate that radiated from Dritan's gaze could have burned the flesh off of the most devout of R'hllors' followers. Jaime still had no faith in this god or any god for that matter. Even if this Lord of Light had happened to raise his sister up on a pedestal as some sort of savior.

Neither speak, looks enough spoke of their resentment toward one another. Jaime pivots back on his heel and returned to the surface. He couldn’t have done it, he was locked behind bars. Not to mention that there were always two guards that stood outside of the cellar doors.

Nagging at him was the steely conviction that it was the fallen Fiery Hand. He couldn't explain how, but Jaime had an inkling that Dritan played a part in Nuahlin's murder. It was possible for him to be working with other like minded soldiers who had shot (y/n) dirty looks for her decision to let Inniros walk free among them. Why Nuahlin though? If they really wanted to hurt (y/n) and the temple, they should have gone after the High Priest and whatever clergy members they could find. This killing offered potential guilty parties nothing. Nuahlin was an old man with chronic pain in his joints. There was no honor in killing someone like him.

Dritan was not a man of honor though. All that Jaime had viewed of him was disdain toward authority and contempt for everyone else. Those who were paired with him during drills always groaned knowing that Dritan possessed no restraint. Jaime himself had an unpleasant experience while sparing with him that resulted in Jaime obtaining a bruised nose (thank the gods it did not break) and in Dritan sporting a bloody, swollen lip. Dirty tricks were popular in Dritan's skills.

By the afternoon, there was still no information on any suspects in the temple but no one was allowed to enter or leave. Since he had been up all night and early morning, Jaime was attempting to catch a few minutes of sleep in the barracks before going out again to offer any help.

The High Priest was understandably outraged at this heinous crime. Ninthalor and the other tyene were ordered to investigate and had Fiery Hands guarding the hallway where Nuahlin's room was located in. This incident was taking seriously yet the tracks of the murderer have suspiciously disappeared or rather there were never any. Whoever it was made sure to be quick and leave no trail. There was one possibility that was narrowed down: someone from the temple's residence had to be the murderer. No one would have been able to get in, not with the guards that had already been out. The assailant had to be already in the temple.

No one was training that day so outside was relatively quiet except for the rustled leaves in the trees as they swayed to the wind's will. A peaceful place to get away.

Had there not been voicing trying, but failing, at keeping quiet outside.

"You saw nothing."

The second voice, the one that woke Jaime up, growled and the wall of the barracks shook as someone was slammed into it from the outside. Jaime slowly got out of the cot and hides under the closest window to hear better. "I know what I saw. What were you up to, Tejas?"

He hears the scuffling of feet, as if one person were shoving away the other.

Jaime felt like he recognized that name but couldn't remember. There were many people in the Fiery Hand that Jaime hadn't been introduced to yet. Mainly the younger members he paid no special interest to. The other voice though, Jaime definitely knew to be Mirac. There was no way for him to mistake anyone else. Mirac had fought in the infamous fighting pits of Slaver's Bay. The flesh of his eyelid was deformed, fusing partially to his bottom eyelid. His bald head was covered with a cluster of scars.

“Piss off.” The younger of the voices hissed before heavy footsteps became faint.

Jaime chances a glimpse from the window and peered down at Mirac. Just as fast as he had peered over, Jaime was already dashing to the entrance door of the barracks to catch the former slave. “Mirac!”

Rich, brown eyes flick over to Jaime and he immediately bristled.

Jaime slowed down to put Mirac at ease before saying “Tell me everything you saw.”

The Red Dahlia was greeted by Astapor's grotesque version of a golden harpy. It's arms were that of leather bat wings spread out in hostility. A scorpion tail curves around the statue's eagle-like feet as it watches the pirate ship slowly entire the gates of one of the infamous ports of Slaver's Bay.

Cersei doesn't take her eyes off of the the glimmering thing. Her nose wrinkled in disgust that was not simply due to the harpy, but also the smell of the city itself. The stench of poverty and slaves mingled with the stink of human waste.

Phiobe has her wide brimmed hat on to stave off the brutality of the sun and her black coat thrown over her like the heat did little to bother her. Her lips, painted in a dark red are curved downward. Cersei had heard the pirate captain complaining of how this stop would derail them from their initial schedule. She was one who delighted in punctuality. Instead her searing gaze drilled into the many peaks of Astapor's pyramids.

Not even the crew was happy to be there. Especially Ferid who had been raised and trained in the worst parts of Astapor. While the Red Dahlia's crew was still considered wealthy in the city, they could not revel in spending any of it. Everyone had their hearts set on the extravagant Yi Ti markets and brothels. There was even an infamous street in the foreign kingdom that was entirely made out of jade bricks. Nothing worthwhile would be purchased in Astapor aside from paying workers to mend the parts of the ship that had been damaged by their previous battle at sea.

"Bricks and blood built Astapor, and bricks and blood her people." Burly Dardan said in a near prophetic tone. He shook his head and scoffed. "More like piss and blood from the smell of it."

Cersei couldn't agree more, although she would never verbally agree with such a brute.

"We won't be here for long." Phiobe consoled. She didn't like the prospect of staying for too long any more than that of her shipmates. "Just be thankful nothing important was damaged. Otherwise we might be here for months."

Everyone cringed in unison at that scenario.

They were welcome to stay on the ship with her while the work was being done. A captain never felt right when they were too far from their ship and Phiobe wanted to make sure no one screwed up their job on her precious vessel.

When the Red Dahlia finally came to a complete stop in the harbor, many of the crew decided to stay on board while others (although grumbling about it) got off to seek at least some higher form of comfort other than their flimsy cot in the ship. Nothing would be able to compare to the beds available to all of them in Yi Ti though.

Carmine eyes flash over to Cersei as Phiobe now addresses her glorified prisoner. "You will be coming with me. I have business to attend to while Ferid and Dardan deal with the ship maintenance."

An indignant flame licked inside of Cersei, loathing how Phiobe toted her around like a glorified pet.

Amused, Phiobe arched a finely sculpted brow at the disdain evident on Cersei’s face as she was unable to hide her disgust.

There was nothing she could do in her current situation. In all regards, she was Phiobe’s prisoner.

Like any obedient pet, Cersei grudgingly followed her down the ladder that was let loose off the side of the ship so that passengers could disembark on the stable wood of the Astapor docks. But there was no way Phiobe would let her captive walk off freely. The streets are crowded and Cersei could easily hide herself among the throng. Before she could come up with a plan, Phiobe has her fingers latched onto her wrist and wrenches her closer to the captain's side. One of her sailors hands her what looks to be an iron collar. Dread filled her when a chain leash dangles freely.

Cersei lets out a snarl. Already her body is attempting to escape. Phiobe tuts but isn't phased by the young lady's reaction. She knew Cersei would be spitting at the prospect of being pulled around like some sort of domesticated animal. She watches Cersei's face closely as she leans in to clamp the collar around her pale throat. A sharp click told her that the collar was now locked in. Green eyes glare at Phiobe and she could hear Cersei's thoughts of fiery revenge. Silently, she challenges her with an arching of her eyebrow. Right now Cersei had absolutely no power and it didn't look like that would change anytime soon. Phiobe expected Cersei to put up a good fight the entire sea voyage, even now she welcomes Cersei's antagony.

Testing the chain leash, Phiobe gives it a short tug that causes her prisoner to jerk forward. She chuckles a little bit, especially at the expression of absolute loathing that his heating up Cersei's face. "Come along. The faster we get this done, the faster we can go back to the ship. Trust me, you don't want to stay out here in the city longer than necessary. This is nothing like Lys." Her tone grew gruff as she finishes off. Just by the port, Cersei could already tell Phiobe was telling the truth. She recoils at the stench of the city and the filth that hung like a shroud upon it's people. For every perfumed and brightly dressed master, there were a dozen of those who were chained and tattooed. Cersei hates how in some aspect they were alike. Phiobe pulls against her own chain and collar in degradation.

It made her sick.

Right then, she was no better than the common trash of the city.

"If you didn't fight me I wouldn't have to resort to tugging so hard, my lady." Phiobe says as she notices Cersei's obvious disgust. It was annoying how often the Red Dahlia seemed to read her mind. Hated even more that the authority she had reminds her so much of her father Tywin.

The heat didn't take long to make Cersei sweat like a hog and drained of energy to walk further. Not really her fault that her limbs had grown weak from so long in the ship. Most days she wasn't allowed out on the deck unless Phiobe supervised her every move. The eyes on her more many, not like at Casterly Rock where she could travel far before coming upon a guard that would deny her entry.

After that mishap with (y/n) and the cellar lion dens, she'd been forbidden access. Bitterly she remembered how she'd been denied many times to Jaime's wing of the castle. Even after Joanna died, the order held true. Much to both of their disappointments.

A pang strikes her chest remembering Jaime. No, she didn't want to soften her resolve. He'd made his choice. His affections lay with. . .

It ate her up inside. She didn't want to linger on it. But. . . She always thought Jaime was solely her's. Since birth they were together. Belonged with one another. Jaime was absolutely perfect. The only one fit to be with her. Maybe once upon a time she could imagine herself with Rhaegar. Even tasted what being his bride would be like. (y/n) stole all of that. Ripped it from Cersei and hoarded the both of them. Just like she had done with their mother. She despised how Joanna had obviously favored (y/n), that sullen slip of a girl that had screamed bloody murder in the lion's cage.

They hadn't been enough for her though.

She just had to take Jaime.

When her mind began to wander, she was actually grateful for bumping into someone in the slightly congested streets of the downtown area.

In front of her Phiobe walked with an air of complete authority. Even if she was a beautiful specimen, no one tried anything stupid on her. She strut through the streets like she owned them. Her sword bouncing against her wide hips that sway hypnotically. There were stares of envy shot her way most certainly as she did have on fine articles of clothes and rings of gold fitting her fingers. Not a brave soul in the streets even tried to reach out to try and pickpocket from her. Cersei had never heard of the Red Dahlia before her capture but in Essos everyone knew her. Feared her presence and the sight of the red sails on her ship. Maybe if it wasn't for the fact that Phiobe was pulling her along, Cersei might have a sense of immunity since neither she was bothered by the street urchin who gawked at her beautiful, long blonde hair and sharp green eyes. Humiliation deadened what sense of propriety she may have wield.

A few times Cersei gagged at the smells that coiled around her in the streets. She wondered when they would arrive to wherever Phiobe was dragging her too. The captain didn't slow her pace and continued at the same speed in which she had started their journey with. Phiobe didn't break a sweat in the heat of Astapor unlike Cersei who had sweat pouring out of her. One would assume that due to her long and thick black hair, Phiobe would be dying in such weather. Much like the rest of her personality, Phiobe was unbothered nor showed signs of discomfort. She did have a scowl on her face as she watched her step, making sure not to step in mud or even worse shit. Cersei caught her muttering something under her breath before casting a scrutinizing glance to the sole of her boot. The leather wrapped around her calf shined. This was the only irritation that flickered across Phiobe's face. At least Cersei knew for sure that this place was as unpleasant for the pirate captain as it was for the captive.

After about a good fifteen minutes of heat and stink, Cersei finally had enough. "Are we there yet?" She goes to angrily swipe at her bangs that had fallen over her face and stuck to her sweaty cheeks. She knew she sounded huffy.

Phiobe pauses for a moment, regarding her disinclined companion. She took in the pink cheeks and the shine of sweat running down her neck and to the front of her bodice. Thanks to her large brim hat, she didn't have to squint from the sun unlike Cersei. "We're almost there, but if you stop me one more time it'll take much longer."

"Where are we even going?" She couldn't resist digging her heels in resistance as Phiobe continued with a yank of the leash. Tired, hot and hungry made her tempers even worse if that was possible. On top of that, the iron collar around her neck trapped in a lot of warmth and chaffed at her skin. Internally she was thinking of every possible way to get out of her restraints to strangle Phiobe.

"I have to lighten our load. The loot we got from the ship that attacked us, while not being of particular value, can help pay for the expenses of repairing the ship. I know someone who is always willing to take items off of my hands for a generous price. Plus we'll be able to relax in his abode which is much nicer than any part of this hellhole."

There's doubt that any part of this city could be nice.

"But you didn't bring anything with you to sell." Cersei points out. The only thing Phiobe had on her person was her sword, large sack of coins, and chain leash.

"He'll send someone out to retrieve it." informs Phiobe.

Just as Phiobe had said that, Cersei catches the outline of a white and yellow building, a great contrast compared to the city's red brick establishments. The street leading up to the palazzo is utterly empty except for multiple guards that stood watch under the blistering sun. The master's palazzo is a symbol of opulence and power in a city plagued by poverty and despair. Trash was absent and Cersei finally felt like she could gulp down fresh air. Despite the grandeur of the master's residence, the stark contrast between his opulent palace and the squalid streets filled with suffering citizens serves as a reminder of the inequality and harsh realities of life in Astapor. The sentries wore helmets which immediately pointed them out as Unsullied. While they don't move an inch, their eyes watch the two closely as they enter the quiet courtyard. Six more guards stood vigil at the steps of the palazzo, their weapons drawn at the ready.

One of them is about to lift an arm to stop Phiobe from putting her foot on the first step before being pulled aside by another Unsullied guard. "Greetings, Red Dahlia."

Phiobe's red lips curl into her casual smile. "Slopspider." She greets him. The crude name has Cersei staring at Phoibe with intrigue. That couldn't possibly be his name. Even if things were different in Essos, no mother would happily name their child 'Slopspider'. Then again, she wasn't knowledgeable about the customs of the Unsullied slaves.

Ignoring the question on Cersei's face, Phiobe continues speaking with this Slopspider. "Is Master Vogeo Irnel in right now?"

The Unsullied known as Slopspider nods and gestures to the grand front door with his head. Another guard who was closer to the double doors opens them so Cersei and Phiobe could go inside. Change in climate was alarming. Inside the stone palazzo was relatively cooler than outside. Not by much but enough for Cersei to cool down. The entrance hall exudes an air of luxury that was missing from the rest of the city. Phiobe even takes off her hat and hands it to a servant Cersei hadn't noticed prior who stood off to the side of the door silently. The slave keeps her face turned downward as she takes the captain's hat and bows. From a brief moment, Cersei catches the hesitant dark gaze of the slave girl. Like many of the enslaved, a tattoo is emblozened on her cheek of a key. When she notices Cersei looking at her too, her eyes dart back to the floor.

Smooth, polished marble floors spread out before them, reflecting the warm glow of ornate brass lanterns that hang from the high ceilings. The walls are adorned with intricate carvings, depicting ancient scenes of triumph and conquest, paying homage to the city's rich and brutal history. A series of tall, slender columns rise like ancient sentinels, supporting the elegant arches that decorate the hall. Each column is meticulously sculpted with the fine details of mythical creatures and warriors, a testament to the master's taste for artistry and grandeur.

At the far end of the entrance hall, a magnificent grand staircase ascends dramatically, drawing the eye upwards to the master's private quarters. That's where Phiobe led her. Each step she took produced a resounding click from her boot's heels.

"I've been coming here for years." Phiobe informs Cersei as they travel through the quiet halls. Every so often, Cersei spotted an Unsullied guard, tucked away around a corner or in an alcove to catch intruders by surprise. "If you can help it, keep your mouth shut in front of Vogeo. He'll already proposition me a price for you once he sees you. Even more if he finds out that you talk back."

"He likes a challenge too?" Cersei remembered Phiobe mention something about her Yi Ti prince liking women who were a challenge.

Phiobe laughs. "Oh no. He'll smack you right across the face for that insolence and get joy from it too. His hand is not as kind as mine or Heiu's. If you act the same with him as you do with me, he'll have you tied to the stretcher and whipped thoroughly. And I'll probably let him." She shrugs at that last comment with a sly smirk. "If only to teach you a lesson."

She keeps her glare pointed to Phiobe's back as she stops in front of another set of large doors. The Unsullied station there pull open the latch.

The master, whom Phiobe called Vogeo Irnel, sat at his massive desk with a mess of parchment strewn all over the surface. A man with leather like skin and head adorned with a crown of thinning hair. He was definitely much older than her own father and though not excessively fat, he possessed a noticeable belly that proudly displayed his status and wealth. His attire was composed of luxurious silks that drape over his ample form. Beady eyes are sharp and calculating but crinkle with genuine delight when he sees Phiobe front and center.

"Phiobe!! What a pleasure to see you!" He exclaims, with his mouth wide open there was a shimmer of gold teeth replacing ones that were long gone. Pushing himself out of his seat, he hobbles over to the much taller figure of Phiobe who is smiling at the stout man. "You should have sent word you would be visiting. I would have put together a splendid feast for you."

"Unfortunately this isn't a casual drop by. I'm on my way to Yi Ti but was attacked by another pirate ship. Took some damage, but not too bad." She sighs as Vogeo all but ignores Cersei since Phiobe drops her leash to the floor. If she wanted to flee, it would prove difficult as the place was surrounded by Unsullied at every corner. Not even Cersei was that cocky in her ability to charm people. Especially those who no longer had what drove males to answer her every whim. "I've come to sell what I was able to pilfer from the offending ship."

Vogeo nods enthusiastically, setting the captain down into one of the spare chairs that were available in his office. When he goes round to take back his seat, that's when his beady eyes finally notice Cersei standing awkwardly. "And who is this?"

"A gift to one of Yi Ti's many princes. I picked her up while traveling along the coast of Westeros."

Suddenly his eyes weren't so beady anymore as they round. "Really? I'm surprised you ventured that far. While Westerosi fleets can ever boast of their power, there's still the islands of the Iron Islands to contend with."

Phiobe reclines against the chair. "If you haven't heard, Westeros is in the middle of a civil war. A pirate ship is the least of their worries."

So she knew of the political climate of the Seven Kingdoms.

Vogeo grimly nods while keeping his focus on Cersei. "Yes. . . I have heard. They call the Targaryen king mad."

For once, Cersei manages to keep her mouth shut; tongue clenched between her teeth. While her spirit fought to obey orders from Phiobe, she did not care to be whipped. She'd seen it done to many people. That was something that actually made Cersei queasy. She could never stand to see a whip snap against someone's bare back. The crack of it and the immediate line of blood that followed.

"Apparently so. This one was on her way to Dorne. Apparently she was to marry Prince Oberyn Martell." The way she says it is so casual opposed to the violence that happened in her capture. "We didn't get much from her ship, but she's prize enough. I figure what I can sell you will make up for the price I have to pay for the damage."

While his gaze had ventured back to Phiobe, it starts to wander once again over to Cersei who stood rod straight and fixed her narrowed eyes to the balding master in front of her. Her skin crawled at his attention, less than flattering instead of taking it as a compliment. Not from this man who reeked of perfumes and sweat.

Phiobe brings his attention back as she retrieves a rolled up sheet of paper from the inside of her jacket. She places on top of the already packed desk. Vogeo hums and takes the roll, opening it to glance over all the items listed. "I think I can give you a good price. Are you sure you want to wait to unburden yourself of the qeldlie riña?"

Cersei feels herself bristle at the suggestion that the Red Dahlia sell her to this man. A part of her worries that if this man gave the captain too high of a price, she might very well accept it and hand her over.

While she can't see her face, she can hear the smile in Phiobe's voice. "I'm sure. Prince Heiu has been looking for someone like her to add to his harem. Plus it's been many years since I've paid him a visit."

Vogeo reluctantly returns his gaze back to the Red Dahlia, letting Cersei breathe in an air of relief. At least she would not have to yield to anyone any time soon. This stop in Astapor only prolonged her inevitable fate in Yi Ti. But it would give her plenty of time to think of what she wanted to do when she got there. The hunger for vengeance was a raging pit in her. Only the fact that Yi Ti was in the same continent as Volantis soothed her. While she hadn't seen it, Phiobe said that on the way to Astapor, they had actually passed by Volantis much to her chagrin. Had she known, maybe she would have thrown herself overboard and try to swim to shore. But there were creatures who dwelled in the deep waters. Ugly things that had rows of sharp teeth for tearing apart flesh. Knowing she'd just passed by where (y/n) and Jaime were ate her away. So close. So damn close.

Captain and master spoke to each other for quite some time after that. Drinks were brought to his office, even one for Cersei. He'd even called in a few Unsullied to pick up the items from the Red Dahlia along with a stamp of his sigil and Phiobe's signature. She instructs them to give it to Dardan.

Master Vogeo raises a bushy eyebrow. "Is Blacklouse not in your service anymore?"

"He goes by Ferid now." She tells him nonchalantly but Cersei detects a bit of a protective tone in her words. "He doesn't like being reminded of what he used to be. Best for him not to interact with other Unsullied. Bad enough he had to return here."

Playing around with the new name, Vogeo makes a bit of a sour face. "You give him autonomy?"

There's a brief moment of stunted silence as Cersei watches Phiobe's shoulders square off. "Ferid paid off his debt. He's a free man. I'm happy enough that he chose to stay on my crew."

That amuses him and makes his belly rumble as he chuckles. Valyrian leaves his mouth, words Cersei was uncertain of. Like any highborn lady, her father had her learning languages at a young age. All Lannister siblings learned Valyrian. Cersei never bothered continuing with her lessons once Rhaegar's bride was chosen. She'd thought it would have given her an upper hand had Rhaegar chosen her. She could have easily blend into the Targaryen Court. It never came to pass.

Whatever he said must have not been to Phiobe's liking. Vogeo's face falters, the smug smile that had been plastered on his shiny face drops. It makes him mumble a quick apology but seems to have clammed up. Her expression must have been a terrifying one if it was enough to strike fear on this man's face. Never ceasing to amaze Cersei how much power Phiobe wields, envy nips at her. How was it in this world controlled by men that someone with such feminine beauty like Phiobe was able to pave a way for her own success. What sacrifices were necessary to get to her level? If Cersei had to sell her soul to the Stranger, she would happily pay the price. Anything to be like her. Phiobe didn't let what was between her legs get in her way.

Eventually, farewells are made and Phiobe stands to pick up the discarded leash. Well enough for Cersei since she'd been standing for the entire time and her feet were growing weary. And while the inside of the palazzo was slightly cooler than the outside, there was still a nice sheen of sweat building up on her top lip and beading at her hairline. He'd already handed over bills of sale that would be good to cash in anywhere in Essos. She tucks them away, secure near her breast as she bids good day to one of Astapor's most rich slave masters.

The walk back was just as quiet. Above in the sky, the sun was making it's slow descent past the horizon. Even the heat had let up if only a bit. Before, Cersei hadn't bothered to learn anything about Phiobe besides the fact that she was ruthless as she was beautiful. She seemed complicated, unfathomable to even imagine what kind of environment she'd grown up in in order for her to become what she was. While she had taken no captives during the fight with the other pirate ship, Phiobe had dragged the captain back onto her own ship and beheaded him swiftly. She'd cut through his neck like butter, so easy and without flinching as his blood sprayed from veins and arteries that were severed. Oh how Cersei wanted that power. That ability to bask in being covered in blood and gore. She'd need to be like that in order to survive in Yi Ti according to Phiobe as the other courtesans in Prince Heiu's harem. Poison and assassins were the norm. But if Cersei had learned anything from trying to kill her own sister, she'd need to take things into her own hands and wield an actual blade.

To admit it out loud though, especially to Phiobe of all people, was more than embarrassing for Cersei. She'd have to acknowledge her own weakness and shortcomings. That was something she was loathe to do.

Only when the two of them were back on the ship, familiar grounds, did Cersei stop Phiobe from leaving her quarters. Phiobe arches an eyebrow, her scarlet eyes questioning at her captive who dare grab on to her arm in such a manner. Her tongue lay heavy in her mouth for what she was about to say. "You. . . You command so much authority."

She's amused by this. "I do."

Her face burned. "How?"

Phiobe takes a step back to examine all of Cersei. Her eyelashes are so long and dark that once more Cersei feels immense envy toward this creature. "Why do you want to know?"

"I'm going to need to be like you if I ever want to kill my sister."

"You want power" Phiobe's eyes are near glowing as she looks down at a breathless and flustered Cersei "and control of your life."

In that strange and confusing moment, Cersei actually craves to be touched by her. "Yes." Gods did she want the power that she possessed. Be her, consume her so that they became a terrible force and destroyed all those who got in her way. With the way Phiobe was looking at her stirred something up in Cersei. She'd been able to charm her way into almost anything with her charm and looks. Maybe, just maybe she could do the same with Phiobe. Never one for delaying her desires, Cersei goes in to kiss Phiobe but is instantly put at arm's length; opposed to the previously intimate hold she'd been in.

Much to her added horror was the fact that the Red Dahlia was laughing. "Oh no, my lady. You wouldn't survive my appetite."

Her cheeks burn furiously. She'd never felt this sting of rejection since Rhaegar chose (y/n) as his bride.

Phiobe shakes her head as her laughter died down. She takes pity on the bright red face of Cersei. "But, I will help you."

That did manage to be a soothing balm. "Why?" Even though she'd admitted her deepest desire, Cersei was still confused why Phiobe had let her live let alone would be willing to help her out with such a daunting task.

She raises her eyebrow once more in question. "Because you just asked me."

"No, why are you doing any of this?" The Red Dahlia was difficult to understand let alone read and this frustrated Cersei to no end. In Westeros she'd been exceptional at reading the faces of people.

Phiobe had been close to the door that led to the captain's quarters. She steps away from her previous path to stalk around Cersei in an appraising manner before going to her desk to sit upon the ledge. "Perhaps I'm simply an agent of chaos. Or maybe even I'm a sucker for a pretty face." Neither pacified nor answered Cersei's question. But that was the nature of the Red Dahlia. A mystery, a puzzle that Cersei could spend the rest of her life trying to solve yet not get anywhere. "We'll start tomorrow since it's unlikely the ship will be ready anytime soon."

"Start what?"

"Your training of course. Astapor is the perfect place to learn how to master cruelty."

Author's Note: like i put in the warnings, this chapter does mean we're officially caught up here on Tumblr and it will take me a while to get part 52 out. and just to clarify, cersei having a girl crush on phiobe was inspired from the books where she has a fling with taena Merryweather. This also means cersei's parts are going to be darker and will involve torture. reader's povs will also be getting darker too.

Taglist:

@boywivlove

@esposadomd

@domoron

@yentroucnagol

@enchantingcupcakecollectionfan

@bregarc

#reader insert #reader insert fanfiction #game of thrones fanfiction #game of thrones fanfic #asoiaf fanfiction #game of thrones #asoiaf fanfic #asoiaf fandom #game of thrones x reader #game of thrones reader insert #asoiaf reader insert #asoiaf fic #a song of ice and fire x you #a song of ice and fire x reader #a song of ice and fire fanfic #a song of ice and fire fanfiction

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karasbroken · 5 months ago

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I've been back on the Unfamiliar Idioms bandwagon, I even started this post three weeks ago, and just didn't get it done. Luckily I'd left myself more of the next chapter of Bite the Dust than I'd thought, so once I opened the file, I wasn't starting from scratch. Isn't that the best feeling?

I've been thinking about getting John and Aeryn down onto a planet again. I think I want to set up a situation where he realizes how differently she thinks, that she barely cares about things like exploration and has little sense of things like aesthetic beauty.

There's just vast swaths of human experience that she can't relate to. She's utilitarian, and defensively active and productive, with an extremely limited idea of what there is to do in life other than train, serve, and occasionally blow off steam in prescribed ways. Having hobbies, just traveling for the fun of seeing new things, enjoying a sunset are all alien. And I think that's going to be more off-putting to both of them than whatever weird issues they're having figuring out how to hook up....

But anyway, here's a bunch of nonsense about John trying to talk Aeryn into detouring to visit a planet just for fun. They're in his module, using the Earth engines to burn off his rocket fuel, when he spots an interesting inhabited world she doesn't want to bother with.

Aeryn heard him sigh, and go silent again, and she thought he'd given up. But a micron later his hands intruded, sliding up her sides and along the backs of her arms, to squeeze just below the elbow on each side. "What are you doing?" Aeryn double-checked that she hadn't missed some errant indicator or other problem he was trying to correct. Then she realized that he was using his gentle grip to subtly tug the hamman-side control, altering their trajectory toward the planet. "Stop that," she snapped, stiffening her arms to prevent the manipulation. He slipped his hands up to her shoulders instead, turning his grip on the perpetually tight muscles there.

"We're already here. And we don't have to meet Moya for arns," he coaxed.

John had a tralk's knack with his hands, curse him. "There's no reason to change our plans, and Moya won't wait if we get in trouble." That was a lie, though, and her resolve to both refuse to land and avoid further entanglement with this human was melting faster than the knot his fingers had discovered.

“Come on, this is your last chance to show me that a big bad Peacekeeper pilot can handle atmospheric flight in my barbaric module with its chemical-fuel engine and lack of omni-directional thrusters. It’s going to be field-force manipulation and plasma propulsers from here on out.” His breath warmed the back of her neck, as he murmured faux seductively into her ear. “You ever landed a craft that couldn’t brake or hover?”

Taunting her was a cheap trick, and pretending to seduce her was worse. But frell it, it might be working. There really wasn't any reason to rush across the system, Moya had no timeline or destination. And suddenly, taking a trip down to the surface sounded exciting. She’d landed gliders and other craft without engines in both simulation and battle, but only for stealth purposes, or to practice emergency procedures for engine loss, and always in ships far more sophisticated and automated than the module.

Flying a rudimentary craft with forward propulsion alone into a deep well would be a unique challenge. No, hardly a challenge, if Crichton could do it, but a new experience at least. Doing a gravity landing in an unfamiliar craft was a risk, of course, but if necessary, John could take over most of the controls from the gunner's seat, and talk her through the rest. Plus they had the backup of the newly hetch-capable Leviathan drives, if something went wrong.

“You know how the others get when we have a delay," she said, feeling the tug of temptation, "especially for anything having to do with your module.” It was undeserved, in Aeryn’s opinion, but the rest of the crew had yet to grasp that John was quite talented for a tech and there might yet be some value in the wormholes he was intent on chasing with the thing.

"That sounds like a yes," he murmured into her ear with a smugness that would have instantly changed her mind if she wasn't distracted by the warmth of his palms she could feel even through the decom suit and the way his thumbs were sinking into the band of muscles on either side of her spine.

She tried to shrug away his hands, the module wobbling slightly under her unsteady steering, but he continued his assault. "I'm considering it. But only if we at least pick up some of their famous food cubes." They'd gone truly hungry only once since she arrived on Moya, but that had been enough to make Aeryn reflexively resupply at any opportunity.

“Deal!" he said, immediately letting go of her and sitting back again. "Who knows what else they might have. We could really use a few decks of cards. And I could look for vitamins, too, or at least see what they have for medical supplies. A bottle of azs-prihn that doesn't put me right to sleep would be nice. Do you have any money on you, or something we could trade?”

Aeryn didn't let herself miss his touch, focusing on how irritating he was being instead. The human was almost as bad as the Hynerian when it came to shopping, but she'd invited that, she supposed. “I have currency with me, but I didn't bring anything to barter with unless you want to trade this junk heap to their local archaeological foundation.”

"You said they were primitive, it might be the most advanced technology they've ever seen!"

"Not that backward. Rigel mentioned a space port where traders can land. They don't have any orbiting stations, though, and minimal satellites. Not even an orbital defense system."

"Well that's probably good for us, since the module doesn't have weapons. Satellites, though… Alien satellites! Can we find one? I'd love to see that." His enthusiasm for the most mundane of details was aggravating.

Aeryn craned her head around to peek at what she could through the small module window, but even at max ocular range she didn't spot anything. "Which of these controls activates sensors?"

"Sensors? The module has some basic sensors that track gravity, outside heat, radiation." He leaned an arm over her shoulder, pointing out the dials and small displays as he named them. "But nothing like what you probably mean. I can't find objects in space unless I'm about to run into them." He pulled his arm back, but rested his hand on her shoulder, still crowded close as if he could see more by being ten denches closer to the canopy.

Flying through space with minimal ability to identify objects in close planetary orbit? Humans were foolhardy, but they were brave.

That hand squeezed again suddenly. "Wait, why did you bring your money if you weren't planning to visit a commerce station?" he asked.

“I never leave anything valuable behind on Moya.” It was just common sense. Between Rigel's habit of appropriating whatever he could get his slimy paws on, and the fact that they'd already been stranded off-ship more than once without any resources, Aeryn had made a habit of filling her pockets and pouches with essentials before any outing.

"I'm going to make you an honorary boy scout," he said, whatever that meant. "That's great. We can stretch our legs, take a look around, find out why the oceans are purple, then hit the space port and bring home something nice for dinner."

"We don't even know if we can breathe down there, or if it's safe," Aeryn reminded him before John got too excited.

"But if it is… Moya's still resting, right? Just taking a cruise through this sector? We can use the hetch drive on the way back, and catch up. As long as we don't stay more than a few hours, no one will even notice we were gone."

"D'Argo was already upset about us going out in the module, especially after what happened the last time we left Moya."

“That wasn't our fault," he protested. "Besides, after almost dying in the cold of space, we deserve a little time on a nice warm planet. And if D'Argo doesn't like it, he can bite me!”

Aeryn assumed that meant something offensive but it was an amusing enough image that she couldn't help turning around enough to look at John's mouth.

“What!” he asked after a microt, still annoyed.

“For a species with such unimpressive dentition, you have a surprising number of sayings involving biting.”

“What?”

“Bite the bullet, bite the dust, bed bughs bite, bite me,” Aeryn enumerated.

“Oh that! Yeah, I guess we do. There's lots more, too. His barq is worse than his bite, bite your tongue, bite your head off, biting off more than you can chew…”

“I get the idea Crichton,” she tried to cut him off.

“Bite me in the eema, won't bite, have a bite, bite the hand that feeds you…”

Aeryn sighed and opened a channel to Pilot. If the module couldn't locate orbiting debris, it certainly didn’t have the necessary scanning arrays needed to determine if the planet had breathable air, let alone the gravity, atmospheric density, and geographic survey they’d need if they were actually going to set down on the ground. Preferably avoiding populated areas. Perhaps Leviathan-tech sensors should be Crichton’s next addition to his junk bucket. “Pilot, can you send me whatever information Moya can provide about the fourth planet in our current system?”

#farscape #aeryn sun #john crichton #wip wednesday #fanfiction

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stillalive19567 · 3 months ago

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Just this once | JenLisa | Chapter 13

My pulse races. I know I can't leave them there. But getting to them with gunfire raining down on me? This might just be the dumbest—and most dangerous—thing I've ever done.

Still, I can't let them die here.

"Alright," I whisper to myself, wiping the sweat off my palms. "Here goes nothing."

Panic surges through me as I spot the small, blinking device under the truck. A bomb. Five minutes.

"Shit!" I mutter under my breath. There are at least thirty people chained inside—kids, women, everyone. My mind races, adrenaline flooding my veins. How the hell am I supposed to get them out, disarm a bomb, and dodge gunfire?

I grab my phone again, fumbling to call Rosé. She picks up after two rings. "Jen, what's happening?"

"There's a fucking bomb under the truck!" I hiss, my heart hammering. "Five minutes—those people are chained to the damn truck!"

"Are you serious?" Rosé breathes sharply, and I hear her curse. "Okay, listen. You need to get those chains off and get them out. I'll be there as fast as I can."

I peek out from behind the tree. The gunmen are still spraying bullets everywhere, completely unconcerned about the lives inside the truck. My chest tightens with fear, but I force it down.

"How am I supposed to do that in five minutes, Rosé? And with these assholes shooting at me?"

Her voice is strained. "Do you see anything you can use? Tools, keys—anything?"

I scan the area, heart racing. Then I see it—one of the gunmen dropped a pair of bolt cutters beside his body after the explosion knocked him down. They're lying in the open, just a few meters from the truck. But getting to them means running straight through the gunfire.

Rosé's voice pulls me back. "Jen, if you don't get them out, they're all dead."

"I know," I whisper, teeth clenched. "I know."

I tighten my grip on the phone. "I'll have to make a run for it."

"Be smart. Don't get yourself killed."

"Yeah, thanks for the pep talk," I mutter, ending the call.

I take a deep breath, heart pounding in my throat. No time to think—just move.

Gunfire still fills the air, but I can't wait any longer. I sprint from behind the tree, keeping low, zig-zagging toward the bolt cutters. Bullets whip past me, and the ground explodes with dust and debris, but I don't stop.

Almost there...

I lunge, grabbing the bolt cutters. A bullet grazes my arm, but I grit my teeth through the searing pain and scramble to my feet, clutching the tool.

I dive toward the truck, sliding underneath. The bomb's timer now reads 3:47.

I take a second to steady my breathing, then crawl to the chains binding the people.

"I'm getting you out," I whisper to the terrified group. "Just hang tight."

The first link snaps with a loud clang.

One chain down—so many more to go. The timer keeps ticking...

Panic grips me as I cut through the last few chains, freeing as many people as I can. But there are still 13 people left, and the timer is ticking down mercilessly—50 seconds left. My breathing turns ragged as I scan the truck, searching for anyone else I can reach in time.

Then, at the far end of the container, I spot a girl huddled in a corner, small and trembling. Something about her feels eerily familiar.

I crawl toward her, my heart pounding. "Hey," I whisper, trying not to frighten her. "What's your name?"

The girl looks up at me, her eyes wide and filled with fear. She mumbles softly, "Ella."

The name hits me like a punch to the gut. Lisa's sister. Holy shit.

"Shit—Ella!" I gasp, panic surging through me. My hands fumble as I reach for her chains, but these are different—thicker, more complex.

20 seconds. My hands tremble, fighting against the clock.

I frantically try to wedge the bolt cutters into the lock, but it's no use. "Come on, come on..." I mutter, teeth clenched.

Ella's tiny voice trembles. "Please... don't leave me."

"I won't," I whisper fiercely, though fear claws at my throat. 15 seconds. My fingers burn as I yank at the metal, desperately trying to snap it.

I try every angle, every ounce of strength I have left. But the chains refuse to break.

With only 10 seconds left, my hands are a blur as I yank and twist the chains, cursing under my breath. My heart hammers in my chest, and sweat drips down my face.

5 seconds.

Then, with a sharp snap, the chain finally breaks.

"Got you!" I whisper breathlessly. I scoop Ella into my arms, her small body trembling as I sprint toward the exit. The timer hits zero.

The deafening explosion tears through the night, the shockwave slamming into me like a truck. I stumble forward, shielding Ella with my body as the blast throws us both into the dirt. Heat scorches my back, and debris rains down around us.

Before I can catch my breath, bullets start flying again.

"Shit!" I hiss, gritting my teeth as pain sears through my side—a bullet tears into me, sharp and unforgiving. I don't stop. I pull Ella closer to my chest, keeping her tucked safely under me as we hit the ground behind a fallen tree.

The sound of gunfire is relentless, but all I care about is keeping Ella safe. She clings to me, her little hands trembling against my shirt.

I press my back against the tree, panting through the pain. Blood seeps from the wound, warm and sticky, but I can't think about that now.

"Are you okay?" I whisper to Ella, brushing her hair away from her face.

She nods, though she's shaking uncontrollably.

"Stay with me, okay?" I say, trying to sound calm, even though I can feel myself getting dizzy.

Just hold on, I tell myself. Rosé's on her way.

The world tilts as the pain in my side grows worse. Three bullets. Each burn feels hotter, sharper, more unbearable than the last. My head spins, and my breaths come shallow. The explosion wrecked my body, leaving my ribs aching and skin singed. I clutch Ella tightly, refusing to let go, even as my strength fades.

The gunfire slows, distant shouts filling the air. Through my blurred vision, cars screech to a halt in front of us, kicking up dust and gravel.

Then, I see it. A familiar car.

Lisa's car.

Relief and confusion crash over me at once, making my head swim even more. What the hell is she doing here?

The car door slams, and I hear the pounding of boots against the ground. Through my fading vision, I catch a glimpse of her—Lisa, storming toward me, eyes blazing with fury.

"Jennie!" she shouts, her voice cutting through the chaos like a knife. Her expression shifts the moment she sees the state I'm in—bloody, barely conscious, and shielding a terrified child.

She kneels beside me in a flash, her hands gripping my face. "Stay with me. Don't you dare pass out on me."

I try to speak, but it's hard to focus. My lips part, but all I manage is a faint, "You took your time..."

Lisa's jaw tightens. "You idiot." She pulls Ella closer, making sure the little girl is safe, before glancing over her shoulder.

I watch through half-lidded eyes as more men—Lisa's people, maybe—rush in, guns drawn, scattering the attackers.

Lisa returns her focus to me, her hands now pressed against my wounds, trying to stop the bleeding. Her touch is both rough and gentle, filled with urgency. "You're going to be fine. Just stay awake, Jennie."

I give her a weak, lopsided smirk. "Didn't know... you cared."

Lisa glares, but her voice softens. "Shut up. You're not dying on me."

Lisa pulls Ella into a tight hug, burying her face in the little girl's hair. Her entire body trembles as she clutches her sister like she's afraid to let go. I blink slowly, trying to stay conscious, but it's hard to ignore the sharp pain radiating through my body.

Then I see it—tears glistening in Lisa's eyes, trailing silently down her face. It's the first time I've ever seen her cry. The cold, arrogant Lisa, always so controlled and untouchable, crumbling right in front of me.

"Ella..." she whispers, her voice breaking. "I thought I lost you."

The sight stirs something strange in my chest, cutting through the pain momentarily. It's raw, unguarded, and so unlike her. For a moment, she's not the mafia boss or the enemy I've known. She's just a sister who almost lost someone she loves.

I exhale slowly, my vision dimming at the edges. "Lisa..." I mumble, barely audible. "You... okay?"

She quickly wipes at her tears with one hand, her usual mask slipping back on. But her voice stays soft, cracking at the edges. "I will be... if you stay alive."

Her words hit harder than any bullet could. As my eyelids grow heavier, I manage a weak, teasing smile. "Guess... I have to, then."

Lisa looks down at me, something unreadable flickering in her gaze. "Damn right, you do."

Lisa suddenly pulls me into her arms, hugging me so tightly it feels like she's squeezing the life out of me. I can barely breathe, but I don't have the heart—or the energy—to push her away.

Her voice trembles as she mumbles against my shoulder, "Thank you, thank you, thank you."

The warmth of her embrace is overwhelming, almost desperate, as if she's holding onto me for dear life. It's not the cold and calculating Lisa I'm used to—it's someone vulnerable, someone scared.

I wince from the pain in my wounds, but I let her hold me. For a moment, we're just two people caught in a storm of chaos, clinging to whatever peace we can find in each other.

Her arms tighten even more, and I groan weakly, "Lisa... you're... crushing me."

She loosens her grip slightly but doesn't let go. "Don't care," she whispers, her voice thick with emotion. "You saved Ella. You saved her, and... I don't know how to thank you enough."

I try to smirk, though it comes out more like a grimace. "You could start... by not squeezing me to death."

Lisa gives a shaky laugh, a sound so rare from her that it almost catches me off guard. But she doesn't pull away. And for once, I don't mind.

Lisa finally pulls back, just enough to look at me. Her hands cup my face, her eyes scanning every inch as if she's trying to make sure I'm really here, really alive. The tears in her eyes make her look different—softer, more human.

"You're bleeding," she says, her voice strained. "We need to get you help, now."

"I'll live," I mutter, though the pain is spreading through my body like wildfire. My legs feel like jelly, and my vision starts to blur.

Lisa shakes her head fiercely. "Don't be stupid." She glances over her shoulder and yells at someone behind her, "Get the med kit, now!"

Ella clings to her side, looking up at me with wide, tear-filled eyes. "Is she going to be okay?" she whispers.

Lisa's jaw tightens. "She has to be."

I manage a weak smile at Ella. "I'm tougher than I look, kid."

But as soon as the words leave my mouth, my knees give out, and I collapse. Lisa catches me before I hit the ground, her arms steady around me.

"Stay with me," she whispers urgently, her breath warm against my ear. "Don't you dare pass out on me."

"I'm fine," I slur, but the darkness is closing in fast.

The last thing I feel is Lisa pressing her forehead against mine, her grip unyielding, as if she can keep me tethered to reality.

And then everything goes black.

When I come to, the world is hazy, and the sterile scent of antiseptic stings my nose. I blink slowly, trying to adjust to the dim lighting. A sharp ache radiates through my body, and I realize I'm lying on a bed, hooked up to IVs.

I hear a chair scrape against the floor, and Lisa is immediately by my side, her eyes red and tired, as if she hasn't slept in days.

"Finally," she breathes, brushing a stray hair from my face. "I thought you were going to be out forever."

"Where...?" My voice is dry and raspy.

"Safe house," Lisa says quietly. "The doctor came earlier. You were lucky."

I scoff weakly. "Lucky? I got shot three times."

Lisa leans back, her expression unreadable. "Yeah, and you saved Ella. That's all that matters."

The memory of the explosion and gunfire hits me all at once. "Ella... where is she?"

"She's fine," Lisa reassures me, her voice softer now. "She's sleeping in the next room. Kept asking for you, though."

I close my eyes for a moment, relief washing over me. "Good."

There's a long pause, and when I open my eyes again, Lisa is still sitting there, watching me carefully.

"You were an idiot," she mutters, her voice thick with emotion. "You could've died."

"I didn't have much of a choice, did I?" I whisper, trying to keep my tone light despite the weight of her words.

Lisa's jaw clenches, and she leans closer, her gaze burning into mine. "You're not allowed to die on me, you hear me?"

Her words catch me off guard, and for a second, I see the walls she usually keeps up crumble just a bit.

I raise an eyebrow, smirking through the pain. "Didn't know you cared so much."

Lisa rolls her eyes, but there's no malice in it. "Shut up."

Despite everything—the bullets, the explosion, and the chaos—there's a strange comfort in the way she stays close, as if daring me to leave her side again.

#blackpink lisa #blackpink rosé #blackpink jisoo #fanfic #blackpink #jenlisa #gxg #jennie #mafia

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casspurrjoybell-19 · 1 year ago

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Does it Matter? - Chapter 39 - Part 1

*Warning: Adult Content*

Dara had been drifting in and out of sleep since Maric had knocked on the door, so he was a little more prepared to be awake when another knock came about an hour later.

Brayan stepped into the room, a tray of food in one hand and a lantern held up in the other.

"Time to eat."

Bug was still deep in sleep, so Dara shook his shoulder gently until he woke.

"Bug. Wake up. Food."

Brayden set the tray and the lantern down on a small table and went to light the fireplace.

"Mathers said you should both be fine with solids at this point but there's some soup there as well. He doesn't think Bug is severely underweight enough for eating too much to put him at actual risk but will likely throw up if he overdoes it so make sure he moderates himself."

Bug sat up and self consciously combed his hair back into order with his fingers.

"Would you like to stay and eat with us, Sir?"

"I've already eaten," Brayan said as he stood up from the now burning fire.

As soon as Brayan had left the room, Bug flopped down and let out a long sigh.

"I feel he does not like me as much as I like him."

"I can't comment on comparative degrees but I think he cares for you."

"Hmm. Sometimes I feel like he does and then he pushes me away again."

"Perhaps he's simply trying to be professional?"

Bug made a face.

"I don't want professional. I want him."

"I know."

"It wouldn't be illegal for him to be with me now. That was the reason he gave for turning me down last time. Do you think if I offered myself to him again, he would accept?"

Dara hesitated.

"That was also the reason he gave me for turning you down when he told me about it, though I'm not sure that was truly the only reason he abstained. You're fragile, Bug. He would hurt you."

"I have scarring. There'll always be pain. I'm willing to suffer it in the moment if he'll hold me in his arms afterwards."

"That's not how things should be, Bug."

"It's the only way they can be for me now."

Dara placed a hand on his shoulder.

"No, Bug. Listen... I can fix the scarring. I think I can, anyway but if I do that for you, I want you to promise me that you won't let him hurt you. That if he does something that scares you or causes you pain, you will tell him and ask him to stop."

"You would do that for me?"

"I will, if you make me that promise."

Bug sat up, his head nodding rapidly.

"I will. I promise."

"Do you swear it?" Dara asked, switching into Eulan.

Bug nodded again, more solemnly this time.

"I swear it."

"Well, okay then," Dara said.

"There's a slab of butter Brayan brought up with dinner that we could make do with, if you don't mind. I could ask for something more suitable but..."

"Do you think the prince might disapprove of you doing this for me if he found out?"

"I don't know," Dara admitted.

"He owns me but I don't think either of us wants that to dictate how we conduct ourselves. Technically I shouldn't be offering to do this for you at all. I should be asking him if I may."

Bug dropped his gaze.

"I wouldn't want to get you in trouble with him."

"No, it's not like that and like I said, we don't want it to be like that. I'm not trying to go behind his back in doing this but I do have to be a bit discrete because well, It reflects poorly on him if others see me disregarding his authority."

"I think I understand."

"Good," Dara said as he got up to get the butter.

He tapped his chin as he considered Bug and the bed.

"I think face down with a cushion under your stomach would be the best for access while hopefully making you feel a bit less exposed. We can do it whichever way you'd like, though."

"No, that's fine," Bug murmured.

Dara brought the plate with the slab of butter on it over to the bed and sat down as Bug started taking off his pants.

"This will take some time, unfortunately. Scar tissue is, difficult. If it gets to be too much, let me know. I have my own issues with things like this and Maric did this to me, for other reasons, of course before he realised and it was not a fun situation for either of us. So I understand."

"I think I'll be okay."

"But if you aren't..."

Bug nodded.

"I'll make the same promise to you about this as you had me make for Brayan. I'll say something."

"I appreciate it," Dara said.

"I'm happy to do this for you but harming someone in that way is abhorrent to me."

"Should I...?" Bug asked, slipping his thumb under the band of the thin shorts he had been wearing under his pants.

"Yes, let's give this a go."

As Bug took off his shorts and got into position, face down with a pillow under his stomach, Dara greased his fingers up as best he could with the butter.

He would have to be careful and very, very gentle.

This hadn't felt great when Maric had done it to him and that was without scar tissue making things more uncomfortable.

Dara took a deep breath in, let it out as a slow sigh and leant forward.

"Try to relax."

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stucknthemiddleff · 1 year ago

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Ultimatum 1.11

Stuck N The Middle

April•

Calen

Watching every move that Erin made, she swiftly snapped her fingers for the little Ana girl to do something. Walking away with attitude she went to the far wall of the warehouse and I took in more of the huge building. My headache continuously throbbed through my head, being able to feel myself passing out. Then someone abruptly grabbed me up, barely standing to my feet, I shook out of my sluggishness. It was Charlie again, he man handled my body like it was a piece of paper sitting me down in a chair across from Erin.

Erin cleared her throat with a chuckle staring at me, "Now now Calen, don't want to go falling asleep could have a concussion."

Scrunching my eyebrows at her, I took a deep breath, "You think killing me is going to make her run back to you, then you're not as smart as you seem to look."

Erin smiled at me with an evil grin, "I'm not going to kill you, who ever said I was going to do that?"

"Then I ask again, why the fuck am I here?" I growled, seeing in my peripheral that Charlie gripped his gun.

"I'm not going to hurt you Calen, you're going to hurt her." She told me plainly, "Simple."

"You're fucking crazy." I muttered at her, she laughed shortly. Of course she would want to put her through more heartache, she never deserved Dana.

"I've been called that once or twice." She shrugged at me as I stared her down with the most evil glare I could give.

"I'm assuming, Dana doesn't know about your little fake mafia you got here, and just how much of a bad influence you are." I snorted, not faze at all by her whack ass set up she had here. Erin smirked at me, then looked over at her over sized football linebacker standing five feet away from me.

"Charlie." She spoke and next thing I knew his fist landed with the side of my ribcage, I coughed out in a groan lifting my head to the ceiling. Fuck.

"I do the talking and you listen, or your head isn't the only thing that's going to be under discomfort." She told me, as I breathed hard closing my eyes briefly. Slouching in my chair, my whole left side slowly became numb. Charlie stood closer sitting me back up in my previous position.

Taking in my silence she started, "Calen I get it, fully and really I do. Dana is a beautiful woman, who took advantage of you to get back at me for hurting her. It was unintentional though. The only reason you know her is because of me. Had I not sacrificed what I did, you wouldn't have the time of day with her."

"No instead of you woman or manning up, whatever the fuck you are. You took the easy way out, and lost." I seethed at her and she looked back to Charlie again. Once again, he struck my left side with much more force. My inside burned instantly, making me feel like I was about to throw up.

I winced in pain, with a swift groan, "Fuck!

Knowing if I took another strike from him, he might fracture something, and I couldn't have that as my body jerked a little in response to the impact it was taking. In the background I could hear a little girlish laugh, that was probably enjoying the show, Ana.

"You done?" She asked me, my breathing labored I looked up at her with a grimace as she sat up in her chair, "Good."

"Calen I know all about you, now you can sit over there and act like you're a goody goody guy that owns businesses and have a clean past. But I know about you more than you know about me, I promise." She told me, and I wondered what she did know.

"Like?" I shook my head.

"Well, you're a blood, and so is your brother Cooper. Right?" She asked me, I couldn't deny that it didn't shock me, "Going on about four years now?"

"So." I shrugged and she smiled, "You think Dana is going to just up and leave me because of that?"

"Dana lost a special friend a long time ago to gang relations, so I'm sure it could but I'm not betting on that." She blinked at me, "Like I said I know a lot about my enemy, always do research on them."

My gang relations wasn't as deep as it used to be, it was my past, in reality this bitch didn't have anything on me.

"Your father and mother that live in Puerto Rico that help with drug cartel international relations, can be gone like that in an instant Calen. Oh, and Cari, Cooper is right here." She told me, boiling my blood. Puzzled I didn't know she would dig that deep into the secrets of the Rodriguez family history. Yes Cassie wasn't my biological mother, but that didn't stop her from letting me in at only the age fifteen about the connections she had. The only reason my father started a family with Cassie is because she wasn't deep into the drug trade, only an advisor but all that could change if this bitch in front of me did something threatening.

Erin smiled mockingly in finally getting my attention, "Besides, you should be able to take losing the rest of your family, since you took losing your birth mother so well by killing her."

"If, you...hurt my family Erin, I will kill you." I acidly responded to her and my ribs took two more impacts my breathing became hitched, I groaned grinding my teeth together.

"I'm not playing here about what's mine." Erin stood bending down to look at me, "And you will feel how it felt when I made that sacrifice to get to spend my final days with her, so that you know the real reason why you are fucking here."

I raised my head to look in her dark grey eyes, "Fuck, you, she doesn't want you anymore you bitch and nothing you do will change it."

I could feel Charlie coming to give me more of his medicine I closed my eyes bracing to fall out the chair, but there was nothing. I opened my eyes to see Erin halting him with her hand, "I said I wasn't going to kill him Chuck, chill."

Breathing deeply I stared back at her with hatred, knowing her not killing me now would be a mistake on her part.

"You have two, only two options Calen." She spoke softer to me, "Break up with her, hell go back to Virginia for all I care or I break your family, what's left of it to nothing."

"You're letting me go?" I asked her and she smiled.

"Told you I wasn't going to kill you, but if you go to the police or try anything. People you care about are going to die. I'll be watching don't forget." She snarled staring into my eyes before standing back up. Looking down at me she slid her eyes to Charlie. With another impact to my head, again I was out cold.

Waking to the sound of my phone vibrating I realized I was sitting in the drivers side of my car, parked in the garage of my condominium building. Somewhere inside me I had hoped that was all a dream of what I witnessed, but the throbbing ache of my left side let me down. That and the back of my head pounded constantly making me feel like I just got out the ring with Floyd Mayweather I leaned it on my headrest. Picking up my vibrating phone, I looked at the time to see it was eight-thirty. I had a missed call from Cooper, and only one from Dana. But she texted me twice asking where I was, making me clench my teeth together. So many thoughts running through my mind, I knew my only goal right now was keeping people I cared about safe. Realizing to not take Erin's threats idly.

Clenching my left fist I dropped my phone in my lap with my right punching the steering wheel in front of me it honked, "Fuck!"

As the left side of my body felt like fire on my skin, I climbed out my car gripping it tightly. I chirped the car limping to the elevator, feeling the back of my head. Making it inside my condo, I stripped of my shirt realizing it was ripped and my jeans sliding out my timbs. In only my boxers I trailed my eyes over my body knowing it bruised easily, my whole left side was purplish blue on my ribcage. If Chuck really wanted to break my ribs he would have without hesitation, and I figured Erin had him not touch my face to keep our meeting in private. I was grateful for it, knowing if my face matched my body and Cooper saw it, I wouldn't have time to plan how to take Erin out for good. Going in my cabinet under the sink I took three large Ibuprofen pills, deciding to get in the shower and think of what my next move was.

Limping out the shower not bothering to dry off I walked into my bedroom where my phone was, it started ringing as I felt the back of my head, looking at my hand. It was bleeding so I used a towel placing it on the bruise. The ibuprofen working fast, with every minute my aches started to fade. Picking up my phone, Dana's name flashed across the screen and I knew I couldn't keep ignoring her.

Taking a deep breath I answered, "Hey baby."

"Hey, your meeting sure as hell went over didn't it?" She asked with a chuckle, her voice, accent just bringing me back to life, I just wanted to hold her so bad.

I chuckled dryly, wincing a little, "Yeah it did, I'm so sorry, forgive me."

"I do, just come over right now, I'm cooking chicken and shrimp alfredo babe." She told me, my stomach automatically responded, even though I wasn't hungry just full of the yearning for revenge.

"Really, sounds delicious Dae." I took another deep breath laying down on my comforter slowly. Last thing I needed was Dana seeing me like this, she wouldn't let it go once seeing the shape I was in.

"Yeah, so when are you getting here busy man?" She pushed making me close my eyes, hurting more in lying to her, but there was no other choice.

"Dana, I have a huge meeting tomorrow and need to get some rest, I'm really exhausted." I told her opening my eyes I looked out my high ceiling windows. The line was quiet at first, and then someone was talking in the background.

"Yeah, he's on the phone Coop, said he's tired." Dana spoke, I bit my bottom lip.

Breathing deeply I moved my head a little on my bed to get comfortable, I didn't hear any irritation in her voice.

"It's okay Calen, you really didn't get much sleep messing around with me last night." She laughed understandably, and that was one of the reasons right there why I fell in love with her.

"Yeah, I know." I lowly chuckled again, wanting nothing more than to taste her food for the first time. But not like this, not like this.

"Get some rest okay? See you tomorrow." She told me, "I'll keep you a plate."

"That would be great, I'll um, be over around three, okay?" I said and she spoke with a uh huh.

"I love you Calen." She spoke into the phone, and I couldn't even say it back just hung up the phone. Sadness filled me as I laid there butt naked, eventually knowing my ass wasn't going to sleep no time soon. Knowing what I would have to do tomorrow, I did a small smile hoping she would forgive me after everything was going so good.

Opening my eyes, it was daylight as sun covered my body realizing I eventually knocked out from getting only two hours of sleep. Trying to sit up too fast I yelled out in pain with my ribcage being more sore than it was last night. Breathing hard I laid back down closing my eyes, my chest rose up and down. Rolling over to my right side slowly I grabbed my phone seeing it was five minutes to eleven. Had a little time to get my shit together until I made it to Dana's apartment. Grabbing the ibuprofen pills I took five out the bottle and made my way to the bathroom slowly. Bending over on the sink I took the pills swallowing the water out the tap.

Groaning I stood back up grossed out at how my skin covering my ribs looked in the mirror, "Fucking bitch."

My phone rung again, I picked it up, "Yeah?"

"Nigga open the damn elevator." Cooper ordered alerting me, I needed to put on some clothes.

"Hold up a minute nigga." I grumbled going back to my room, quickly as my body would let me, I went to my closet grabbing the first shirt and joggers I could find. Fixing up my walking, I opened the pad lock and Cooper stood there looking behind me.

"Bro you got a bitch in here or something?" He asked, I could only laugh at his dumb ass.

"Coop no man, why you ask?" I shook my head leaning against the wall as he walked in my condo.

"Because your ass always up under Dana now man, she really feeling you too, been through a lot. So you better not be fuckin' it up." He advised me, and I chuckled at my little brother trying to school me.

"Man I been working." I told him, walking slowly behind as he went and sat on my couch. He started analyzing me as I came and sat on the armchair of the opposite couch he sat on.

"Yeah, alright." He mumbled. So far so good.

"Why you ain't at work anyways?" I asked him.

"It's my day off, thought we could go hoop or some shit." He told me, and I was in no shape to do that.

"Nah man, I just been trying to relax you know. Back to back meetings and shit. Maybe later on this week." I replied and he nodded at me, standing up he randomly pushed me, my left side numb barely I winced.

"Yo the fuck you doing Coop?" I asked him in a sneer, my side throbbed deeply but I sucked it up.

"No what the fuck is wrong with you? You never turn down hooping over some meetings and ain't your ass supposed to be on vacation?" He asked me stepping closer.

"Nothing man, I'm just not in the mood. Alright." I warned staring at him, walking away to my kitchen. I definitely couldn't hold off holding back this limp much longer, I needed to sit. One more push from Cooper and my cover would be blown. Getting some orange juice out the refrigerator, I looked back at Cooper, his attention was on his phone.

"I guess I'll just bounce then," He declared as I looked away getting a cup to pour some juice.

"Yeah." I breathed not realizing he had walked around to where I stood and lifted my shirt. His light green and hazel eyes enlarged in the sight he seen.

"Cooper what the fuck!" I yelled, knowing he wouldn't quit. Shit.

"No, what the fuck happened to you. Who did this?!" He yelled, "Mataré a quien haya hecho esto! I'm not fucking playing Who?!"

"Cooper calm down." I warned him, continuing to pour my juice. He took a deep breath.

"Just give me the fucking word." He breathed as I took a sip of my OJ.

"I only need one thing from you," I spoke looking over at his serious expression, ready to kill for me, "Watch over our sister and Dana, understand?"

"Calen tell me what the fuck-"

"Coop, listen to me," I cut him off, "Stay on alert, that's all I can say right now."

"Okay, but just let me know soon, what the fuck is going on?" He asked walking closer to me embracing me in a hug, I winced again and Cooper felt it. Grabbing him back I closed my eyes, knowing I wouldn't be able to hide shit from him.

"Deal. I will contact you soon." I mumbled, knowing it wouldn't be that hard to keep him on low key alert for now. The last thing I needed was for him to sacrifice himself for me. Only thing that needed to be sacrificed right now was, what started all this in the first place. I hated it.

Taking a Percocet before I left my condo, I felt it start to kick in as I turned down Dana's street. My eyes got a little heavy as I parked on the curb, it was thundering as the sky started to turn a dark grey. In a thin black hoodie and grey sweats, scully on my head, I walked across the street as it started to pour outside. Taking a deep breath I walked up to the front door unlocking the door, I walked inside the apartment. It was dark and quiet as I looked around the first floor. I heard a door upstairs open and a second later saw Dana at the top of the stairs with a big smile on her face, this shit was not going to be anywhere near easy. The perk I took, would help at least some of the pain I was about to inflict on myself.

Dana

Standing there in his sweat suit he still looked like my knight in shining armor, I skipped down the stairs making my way to him. Gently I closed my arms around him feeling his muscles under his clothing.

Wrapping his arms around me, he held me close like he didn't want to let go. It made me smile harder in feeling his warmth all around me again. Dropping his arms, he rubbed back up mines with his warm hands. I looked up into his eyes, seeing a weird look in them.

"Everything alright?" I asked him, and he looked away disconnecting our eyes letting my arms go.

Taking a deep breath he stood back leaning against the door, "Cari here?"

"No, she's over Bryson's, why what's wrong?" I asked him walking away going to the kitchen. I wanted to give him his promised plate of food and had asked Cari to go over Bryson's spot so I could get some time alone with Calen. Opening the fridge I waited but got nothing, not even a peep out of Calen. Popping his food in the microwave, I looked back before turning it on, seeing he was leaning over the kitchen counter looking away from me.

"Calen, what is wrong I ask again." I declared making him look up at me. Standing up straight he placed his hands in the pouch of the front of his hoodie.

"I don't see this working out between us Dana." He finally spoke looking into my eyes, I noticed now that his eyes looked heavy, like he was high or something.

Shaking my head, I did a small laugh looking at him like he had three heads, "What?"

"I can't do the drama between you and your ex anymore, I thought I could but I can't." He shrugged his broad shoulders looking away from me down at the counter in front of him.

"Calen." I breathed, my heart began to race, "I broke up with her I swear!"

"You say what you say Dana, but I didn't sign up for this, besides I'm going back to VA tomorrow." He admitted, shattering me completely.

"So you don't trust me, is that it?" I asked feeling my voice cracking, as hard as I didn't want to cry in front of him, he was the one that stitched me together and was the one slowly tearing me apart again.

"No, I don't, you were right about all of this to be honest, I'm just sorry I let it get this far." He mumbled shaking his head, he rubbed up against his covered head.

"You don't love me? Anymore?" I asked him and he looked into my eyes, blinking quickly.

"No, I never did, I just thought I did." He breathed with no emotion, my heart felt like it would burst out my chest as the tears continued to stream down my face.

Sniffling I shook my head, "You don't mean that, bullshit!"

Walking around the island I walked up to him beating his chest softly, "You love me, I know you do, you do!"

"No." He stepped away from me dodging my hands hurt in his eyes, "I'm leaving okay?"

"Calen, please don't do this to me, don't please!" I screamed following as he started to walk back to the front door, "What happened to not letting go huh?!"

Stopping his feet he turned back to look at me, I pulled his necklace out from under my shirt, "Why?"

"Goodbye Dana." He muttered opening the front door, and Cari stood there with a confused look on her face.

Calen froze seeing his sister standing there, he tried walking around her but she stopped him in seeing me breakdown.

"What the fuck did you do Calen?" She asked him,

"Dana why are you crying?"

"Por qué?" She yelled at him.

"Cari, move now." He ordered at her and she stepped out the way watching him walk off for five seconds, before coming into the house dropping the bags in her hands to comfort me.

I cried lowly, "Something is wrong Cari! Something is wrong!"

Thanks For Reading!😍

#chris brown #ella mai #first love #writer #eroticromance #love triangle #love #lovers #millionarelifestyle #millionaire #jasmine sanders #atlanta #black women #black tumblr

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forestfragments · 1 year ago

Text

A Lost Letter

I feel like there are universes lodged within my chest cavity. They are alive, pulsating and breathing like

a hidden sparrow

a crumbling of the old kind

a darkness that has teeth.

My mind is caught in an endless labyrinth of paths leading across the entire expanse of time. Memories come and go like the tides. Sometimes they bring the warmth of another age and they feed me spoonfuls of something that tastes like the sweetness of the first flower in spring. But sometimes they carry knives, in all shapes and sizes, and carve every lost moment into my bones and it burns and burns and burns.

How do you hold the knowledge that you can never return?

How do you embrace all the decisions that you cannot understand anymore?

The unspoken confessions?

The moments where you could have reached for someone but hesitated for reasons that are not tangible anymore?

It's a strange sensation to never recognize the person you were yesterday, a few months ago, a year ago. Why did she say all these words and in that manner? Where did she get them from? What was happening to her?

More painful still to wish you could go back and change it all. A deep longing that seeps through all the fibers. A profoundly human experience, I suppose. But what do I know about the human experience?

What I mean to say is:

these are the only hands I have.

These are the only hands I have and it is breaking my heart.

I find myself dreaming about another universe where my body is a different one, where the pain is not a cage I'm building around myself. A universe where I can let go of all the layers and layers of hurt and twisted emotions that are somehow obscuring the stars of my skin.

I want to be brave and I want to carry the sword as if it truly belonged to me. I want to be the kind of being who gives others back the lost threads of their stories.

Perhaps I could have brought the sun to someone who needed it. I wanted so desperately to turn this into a fairytale, to rip my heart out and hand it to you so that you can feel how it was revived by you and how I saw entire realms inside your words. And I don't know where I went wrong, but it slipped from my fingers and it all fell into shadows somehow. We were not in this other universe, we were in this one and here I'm still fragile and haunted and my voice doesn't always follow me, and even though I tried so hard to grow into a steady oak, it was not what was needed. It seemed as though it was only alive in dreams and stories, the place where it all began, but it fell apart upon touching the fabric of this reality. I wish it didn't, I truly do, and I'm sorry for my part in it and for the wounds I caused. If I had the ink, I would rewrite it into another tale, I would spin a web of dreams where we can hold each other how we were meant to. None of these words can turn it around, of course, and here is where the memories carrying their knives come in again. A part of me will forever wish it had been different. A part of me will always belong to our story. But I cannot change it, I cannot change it even though my dreams refuse to believe it. They are still holding on and I don't know yet how I can teach them to open their fists.

And so, the only thing I can do now is to take my own hands as they are and to hold them gently instead of tearing them off. Because where would that lead me? Eternally drowning in long-gone questions as I've always been doing? I have to drag myself out of this eclipse even though I'm nothing but a screaming, scratching, wailing creature these days. I have to grab myself by the shoulders and say,

"Listen, I know I cannot withstand this. I know I want to let myself tumble into the abyss. But I cannot allow it, not yet. There is still a heartbeat singing in me and there are still riddles to unravel. There is still the faint promise of days drenched in light. They belonged to me once, and perhaps they might belong to me again. Even though the pain envelops me right now, I can learn to shed it fragment by fragment. I may not see it right now, but I must believe in it anyway because I have no other choice. I owe it to the child that still rests deep within the oceans of my mind. She was not made for this world, but she still deserves to experience always yet another sunrise."

So I will have to stumble onwards, always onwards. I have no way of knowing how far I will make it and the universes within me are always growing heavier.

I hope amongst them is one where I see you not only in my dreams, where magic has found us and we fly amidst crows and run with the foxes in bodies that feel true to our souls. I hope you have all the love you deserve there and I hope it can untangle the roots of pain you carry. I hope you find it in this universe as well. I hope you are protected by an ever-glowing moon and a canopy of autumn leaves.

I keep it all within me, in the garden I told you about. Perhaps we can meet there, some day, in another dimension, when it has all transformed again.

I will leave the gate open, just in case.

#poetry #poets on tumblr #writers on tumblr #writing #emotions #heartbreak #love letters

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sunshine-vine · 7 months ago

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Fine, I'll do it myself. Here's a sneak peek jeje...

(Inspired by a handful of random corridos as well as @aransmind Cowboy!Suguru who lives in my head rent-free)

Enjoy!

____

Cowgirls Don't Cry

This old mission has served many a purpose, or so Suguru’s been told. It was built as an outpost, grew into a settlement, became a sanctuary and whatever else was needed from it, if the tales are to be believed. One thing’s certain though: This is a place of war.

Too many times these blackened stone walls have been razed under the burning desert sun. Taken, burned, taken again, ransacked and plundered, adopted, pillaged, forgotten… flung from oil-greased hands to ones painted in blood, left destitute and crawling with snakes. Now, it's fallen into Suguru's care, but once upon a while ago, it was a church.

Suguru approaches the cathedral doors in the quiet of the night, boots silent against the powder-fine dust below. The man never wears rattling silver spurs; don't need ‘em or their sharp pageantry to do his work. A man of his word don't have to kick his horse nor his calvary to get what he wants from ‘em. When Suguru says “run”, they do, and he don't have to raise his voice.

The towering wooden doors to the inner corridor creak open with the whine of hinges carrying far too heavy a load.

And there she is, right where he knew she'd be: knelt in front of a mass of melting wax. Flames from a whole mess of candles twist and blow with her breath, making her shadow out to be a monster when it's only itty-bitty Shoko sitting down there. Life’s tricky that way, ain't it?

She doesn't look up as he saunters forth, not even as he stops a few paces away to admire her beauty one last time. Here in the candlelight, she might be made of silk and fire. What a petty outlaw ever did to deserve a treasure this fine is far beyond his recollection, but while he's here, he may as well thank his lucky stars.

He steps forward once again, closing the distance. His wild rose doesn't flinch the slightest bit as his calloused fingers trace beneath her auburn hair.

“Come on outside with me now, precious. You're gonna catch a chill breathin’ all this smoke-air.”

“I'm fixin’ to, Sugu. Let me pray my penance now, ya hear?”

He chuckles, nuzzling close against her neck. As she turns to sigh at him, he catches his own reflection in those deep brown eyes, so worn and weathered. For a moment, the smoke grows thicker, the flickering flames more somber, his voice deeper as he catches her lip and says:

“Then, say a prayer for me.”

With a wince dug deep from her soul, she throws her arms around him as if to hold him to this Earth.

“God will keep us free.”

He holds her closer, kissing the top of her hair. One last moment to memorize the sweet aroma and her feel against his lips. Then, a close murmur in the dark:

“Shoko… This is my last fight. If they take me back to Texas, they won't take me back alive.”

The wheezing puff up from her ribs couldn't credibly be called a laugh – more a testament to his audacity than anything – but then, she tried.

“Don't let ‘em take ya.”

He nods – a little lie to keep the peace. Wouldn't do to die come morning and have Shoko angry with him.

___

Moon blankets the Juarez mountains in a shining pool of blue. Below, two lovers shunned and damned lay waiting on the rocks.

“What’re ya gonna do when they hang me, Sho?”

He asks unto the stars. She stretches, contemplating to the sky.

“Move out to Tijuana, I s’pose.”

He coughs a laugh, making a puff of mist with his breath in the chill desert air.

“Tijuana ain't your kinda town. Ain't no gold, and there ain't nobody like me.”

She sighs, filling up the night with white regrets.

“There’ll never be another man like you, Sugu honey. Ain't never been and won't be since.”

“Never?”

“Not ever.”

-----

If I make a whole story out of this, would y'all read it? 👀 📖

Someone wanna write me an Outlaw! Suguru x Sheriff! Gojo?

#geto suguru #shoko my beloved #jjk shoko #jjk suguru #cowboy #western #sunshinevine wrote it #would you read this?#would you read it?#outlaw suguru #sheriff gojo #jjk #writers on tumblr #my fic #fic rec #self promo #sugushoko

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spiderrrling · 3 years ago

Text

Everything I never told you

summary - your best friend eddie tells you something he really wishes he would have told you sooner | 900 words

warnings - so much angst, reader is in the hospital after taking eddies place in season 4

a/n - sad about ruining your hand? channel it into angst, im genuinely so sorry but i think it's some of my best writing in a bit

"Hey there Trouble," his fingers grazed over your cheek, and he swears he can see the slightest twitch in your eye, hope he wishes won't be empty. Falling down in the chair next to you, normally he would be afraid to wake you from your sleep, a fear quickly subsided.

"you know I'm not really sure how I'm supposed to even start talk to you like this," Eddies voice quivered as his hand latched onto yours tighter than before, his burning hot skin against your ice cold, a touch he used to be so familiar with now turned into something grotesque, ugly even.

"you're here, physically I can see you, I can touch you," he squeezed your hand at that comment, "but you, the you that I know isn't here, I can't see that little glint in your eye as you come up with our next prank, I can't hear your laugh as I make the same lame joke for the millionth time, the you that completes me isn't here," his voice shakes again, whatever sliver of control he had mustered up slipped away from the moment he saw you.

"and you know what, I can't help but blame myself for it, it's my fault, I should have stopped you I should have done something, I should have-" his voice breaks, the hand that isn't holding yours covers his mouth in an attempt to conceal the pain slipping through his mask.

He's shoulding himself again, a common occurrence for someone in this state, everything he knew he should have said. The things that slip through the cracks waiting for the perfect moment before re appearing. But there is no such thing as a perfect moment is there?

It's just the lie we tell ourselves when we are too afraid to say what we really want to say.

But if there ever was a perfect moment, Eddie was sure it couldn't be this.

Lidded eyes, pillows of prisine white bandages slowly turning pink, fanned out hair over threadbare hospital sheets.

Nothing can be heard, other than your deep machine made breaths mixing with his panicked shallow ones.

"I'm sorry I haven't been here, another thing I should have done. "But seeing you- seeing you here means it's real, it means nightmares I could not even dare to dream now stand at my doorstep taking the form of you."

His fingers lace with yours, your grip weak and feeble in his. He probably couldn't remember all the times you held hands, but he knew the feeling of your limp hand in his would haunt him for years to come.

"Lots of people have been though, you would laugh if you knew how many bouquets of flowers that line this room, or the amount of stuffed animals," he takes a second to look around the room before continuing "You're so loved, so loved, no one more than me."

"I wasn't sure what to bring you, you'd hate flowers, make a comment about how they'd wilt before you even got a chance to see them. But it wont shock you to know, Wayne figured it out in the end," he paused, using his free hand to pull something from his bag and placing it in a free spot on the table beside you.

A mug.

Blue with flowers.

The one Wayne bought for you after he realized he considered you family.

It was perfect.

"Yeah it's pretty damn good don't you think, beats all the teddy bears bought at the gift shop if you ask me," he was still holding your hand, terrified of letting you go because he didn't know if he would be able to grab a hold of you again only to be met with no response.

"It's my fault-" he repeats again, "it's my fault you're-" dying, he wants to say it, the word stays deathly silent but they might as well be the loudest thing in the room.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry for all I did, for all I didn't do, for everything I never told you, for all of it I'm so sorry,"

Did you even know what was happening? He had no choice but to believe you did.

"It's ok if you can't fight anymore, it's ok to rest, I just need you to know the last thing I should have done, I should have told you I love you,"

"Not like I do every day, I am in love with you and that is all that I need you to know. The way you never give up on me, the way you talk to Wayne, the way you make me feel when you look at me as if I'm the only other person you share this world with, I'm in love with all of it." Tears had long ago formed in his eyes while he struggled to choke out the words he wishes for you to know.

"I won't bother you for long, I'll let you rest now," Eddie stood up, pressing his lips to your forehead, letting himself linger for more than he should.

"I love you," he whisperes softly against your skin, before finally dropping your hand back into the tussled bedsheets beneath.

thank you for reading <3 comments and reblogs are very appreciated!!

#eddie munson #stanger things #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson x fem!reader #eddie munson x female reader #eddie munson fanfiction #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson angst #eddie munson drabble #eddie munson blurb #eddie munson best friend

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blueicequeen19 · 3 years ago

Note

Hi! Can I request a darkish rafe x pogue reader where they're on the ship at the end of season two and reader basically sacrifices herself and distracts rafe and offers to stay on the ship with him so the others can escape? Thank you 😊

Distraction

"I'll stay. I'll distract Rafe, you find Sarah and get to the lifeboat." I push my cousin towards the door, giving him no opportunity to argue. John B opens his mouth to protest but we quickly hear footsteps so I give him another push, pleading with my eyes for him not to push this. He nods before climbing up the ladder and disappearing. I take a deep breath, pushing thoughts of JJ out of my mind as I walk in the direction of the footsteps instead of away.

I round the corner the same time Rafe does and his face darkens. I turn to run but he catches me around the waist, hauling me through the first door he finds. It appears to be someone's cabin.

"Where's John B?" Rafe demands, shoving me down on the chair.

"I don't know!" I shout and Rafe grips my face harshly.

"You're lying. Where did he go?" Rafe growls and I shake my head, my cheeks hurting from his grasp.

"It doesn't matter, Rafe. You won. You got the cross and the gold." Rafe shakes his head before releasing his hold on me.

"I'm going to kill all your friends. Starting with John B then JJ." Rafe moves to the door and I jump to my feet, catching his arm.

"Rafe, wait." I press my body against his, his eyes slowly taking me in. I slide my hand up his chest, feeling all the defined muscle beneath his shirt before letting my hand graze over the bulge in his shorts. He places his hand over mine, making me squeeze his length while not tearing his gaze away from mine.

"You're trying to distract me." Rafe snarls and I shake my head, stroking him through his shorts.

"No. I want you, Rafe. I've always wanted you." I swallow the lump in my throat, popping the button on his pants and he lets out a breath. JJ pops in my head but I push it away. I had to buy them time.

"Are your Pogues not fucking you right?" Rafe's voice is gruff as I slip my hand in his boxers, finding his impressive length and stroking him root to tip. My hands threatened to shake but I forced myself to push through.

"No one is fucking me right." I flirt and Rafe licks his lips, looking down to see my hand moving in his pants.

"Take it out and get on your knees, Pogue." I slowly do as he says, his cock bobbing in my face as I look up at him. "Such a pretty mouth. Open it." Rafe grips my chin and I obey, feeling the heat from his flesh against my lips. I suck the tip while stroking his shaft, his fingers tangling in my hair. Rafe pushed further and further into my throat until I was gagging but he gave me no room to breathe. I dig my nails into his thighs but he doesn't seem phased as he starts to fuck my face. Tears fill my eyes, my scalp burning from his hands while saliva runs down my chin.

"If you're going to offer yourself up to distract me, I might as well get my money's worth." I gag again just as Rafe shoves himself further down my throat, spewing his hot cum like a faucet. I can't stop gagging even though I'm forced to swallow him down. Rafe groans loud and long before hauling me to my feet and forcing me over the arm of the couch by the door. I'm light headed from the lack of oxygen as he yanks my shorts down my legs. He cups my pussy, rubbing me hard and fast until I'm a whimpering mess, my slick running down my thighs. I hated that I was enjoying this.

"Look how wet you are, you little Pogue bitch. You want this. If only JJ could see you now." I open my mouth to protest when he slams into me, my body collapsing. Rafe keeps a firm grip on my hips, fucking me hard. The couch moves and slams against the wall with each powerful thrust.

"Fuck, Rafe." I cry, stroking my clit as a powerful orgasm hits me all too suddenly.

"I'm going to fucking ruin you. You'll be running back to me for more. That fucking prick won't be able to satisfy you like I do."

"Shut up, Rafe." I snap, anger mixing with desire in my gut. Rafe yanks me upright by my hair, his hand tightly over my throat as his hips slap against my ass. I can’t breathe as my eyes start to roll back.

"You bought them time but I'm still going to kill them. And when I'm done with your pussy, I'll kill you too. Killing is nature."

#smutwarning #rafecameron #rafe cameron smut #dark!fic #dark!rafe cameron #tw dark content #outer banks smut #outer banks x reader #rafe x you

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sleepywriter00 · 1 year ago

Text

Thanks for the tag @kaylinalexanderbooks!!

My words: habit, presence, hate, owe

Your words: conceptual, burning, tease, dread

Habit

From My Knight in Leather (Ever's POV)

"Geeze Bri! Be careful! I'd hate for the godmother of my child to die before they are even born… " I hinted, waiting for my words to fully register in her brain to get her reaction to the decision I had previously made while I was in the shower. As soon as I sat next to her on the bed- being mindful of the food surrounding it- I was pulled into her tight and loving embrace.

Happy tears streamed down her face as she pulled away, keeping her hands on my shoulder as her crystal blue eyes looked deep into my icy silvery gray ones. Probably trying to see if I'm being serious. When she couldn't find a shred of doubt in my stare, her smile widened even more -if that were even possible- as she continuously thanked me over and over again until I got annoyed and shoved a cookie into her mouth to shut her up. " You don't need to thank me, Brianna. You're like a sister to me and I know that you are going to be an amazing aunt and godmother to mine and Enzo's child. " She only nodded, munching happily on the chocolaty goodness mirroring the sincere smile that rested on my face, before a small frown replaced it, seemingly in thought. "How and when are you planning on telling Enzo? " Bri questioned, her right eyebrow lifting in curiosity. Sighing I looked down at my lap playing with my fingers, trying to distract myself from the growing panic settling in my chest. "I don't know how… But I am going to tell him tonight while we are on our date. I just hope that he doesn't reject us… " my hands subconsciously started to rub my lower stomach. I don't have a noticeable baby bump quite yet, but rubbing small circles over that area brings me comfort and I have no doubt that it will become a habit pretty soon. I'm okay with that though. The sooner the better was Bri's only response, but her grip on my hand showed that she was here for me no matter what the outcome of this date might be. And that's all I needed.

Presence

From My Knight in Leather (Ever's POV)

"Are you guys sure it's okay that I'm here?... I don't want you guys to feel uncomfortable, I mean this is your place so if me being here makes you guys uncomfortable then I–" A hand covering my mouth stopped me from rambling my concerns ever further. In shock, I looked to see Jade giving me a stern glare that sent a shiver down my spine in fear. "Ever, listen to me 'cause I'm only going to say this once, " her icy glare turned into a soft and sincere smile as her hand moved from my mouth to my hand giving it a light squeeze. " You are more than welcome to stay here. You have gone through a lot in just one day and need to rest… And we are not uncomfortable with your presence, we've just never had anyone other than Jake stay over and that's only when he's had too much to drink." I couldn't help but imagine what a drunk Jake must be like. He seems like the type who is very clingy when intoxicated and honestly that's adorable.

Hate

From My Knight in Leather (Ever's POV)

What the actual hell is happening? Why is he acting like we're still together?.... Oooh! I get it! Yeah no that's not happening! Not today, Satan! Not to-day! "Get your greasy eyebrows the fuck away from me Enzo! We're not together anymore! " I made sure to yell as loud as I could, just so I could draw attention. And it worked, I noticed a bunch of people had started to gather around us, and usually it would freak me out because I hate large crowds. But I'm not gonna let him use me so that his 'reputation' as the "perfect boyfriend" would stay intact. It's not happening!

Owe

From My Knight in Leather (Ever's POV)

"We need to call the cops. " Adrian said, sitting down next to me as he looked the note over with a scowl on his face. "Are you sure it was him you saw?" he asked, turning to me with a concerned yet fierce look in his eyes. I nodded, clearing the bile that made its way up my throat "this note only confirms it, he's the only one that I know who writes his 'S' sharp like a Z… " I confirmed, pointing at the words written on the paper. "Mom's on the phone with an old friend who's a cop, that I guess owes her a favor– he said that he and his partner are on their way… " Jake walked out of the kitchen, handing me one of the two cups of hot chocolate in his hands. "Thanks Jake… " I smiled softly, bringing the steaming chocolatey goodness to my lips. He made it just how I like it, piping hot with a bit of cinnamon sprinkled over the quickly melting whipped cream. "Where's mine? " Adrian asked when he saw Jake bringing the other cup in his hands to his own lips, a playful smirk on his lips. "You're a big boy you can make yourself a cup of hot cocoa on your own right? " he smirked while taking another sip of his drink, shooting me a playful wink. Leave it to Jake to make light out of a serious situation…

Tagging @brotrustmeicanwrite @cwritesfiction @charismaticwritiholic @caxycreations @dinosaurprostitution @gothamxwattpad @ijustwritehonestly @kbwritesstuff @little-peril-stories @krokuswrites @kaylark @minangelo @spicywater0 @that-chibi-writer @shepardsherd @writeark and anyone else who wants to join!!!

Find the word tag

Thanks @dyrewrites for the tag!

My words: notice, strange, empty, cold

Your words: habit, presence, hate, owe

Tagging @thepeculiarbird @blind-the-winds @writeouswriter @writingwithcolor @sarandipitywrites @sarahlizziewrites @little-peril-stories @buffythevampirelover @aziz-reads @mary-is-writing @writernopal @sleepywriter00 @badluck990 @herrmannhalsteadproduction

Keep reading for:

Niri trying to teach Gabriel how to play Cribbage

Fun world building fact! Also Ash knocks everyone out

Have you ever thought about how cereal is the skeleton of milk?

My sister infodumped about big cats to me and that's how I wrote this scene where Maddie unlocks her inner animal

Notice - from The Secret Portal Part Two

Niri looked at the cards in his hand. With a five, two sevens, and eight, he would just need a six from Gabriel to claim a run, though a quick runthrough of the potential pattern of play in his head determined that one of the cards could not be played. Niri could live with a run of four, though. He played the seven of clubs before signing, “Eleven.” Gabriel played a six of diamonds before calling, “Seventeen.” Exactly what Niri needed. Niri glanced at his hand, then the Cribbage peg board. He needed fourteen more points to win, and with his hand and the start card, he already had fifteen. If he played his five, he could claim the run of four. However, if he played his eight, he could just claim the run of three. He even had the crib to still add. Whatever he did, he’d be okay. Niri brushed his finger past the five and to the eight of hearts. “Twenty-five,” he signed after placing it down. “That gives me a run of three.” Gabriel grunted slightly as Niri pegged his new score. He glared at his hand before tossing a card on his pile. “Thirty. Please tell me you don’t have an ace.” Niri didn’t have an ace. But Gabriel’s five made the play a run of five. Niri clutched his fingers on his last two cards to prevent himself from signing a help. Please just notice, he thought desperately. “Jesus, Shyaka, either play or say go.” Niri cringed as he set down his cards. “Go.” “Ha-ha,” Gabriel said as he moved his peg. He turned the stack in front of him over and waited for Niri to do the same. “You could’ve claimed a run of five,” Niri pointed out before doing so. “What?” His eyes moved around as he thought. “Shit, I forgot I played a four first. I hate this stupid game and its rules. Why would a run count when it’s out of order?” “You’re the one who asked me to teach you!” “Whatever, let’s just finish the round.” They did, and Niri didn’t even have to pick up the crib to win.

Strange - from The Secret Portal Part One (Ash POV)

“If you’re dizzy, I’d rather you not carry me,” Carmen complained, pushing herself off me. “Carmen—” Jedi started. “No, really, I’m fine.” I was grateful, as I was feeling nauseous. I suddenly understood the elevator. I knew that the mechanics helped cancel out the impact of gravity toward the end, using techniques of negative energy. Stairs didn’t exist in Alium—too great of a height difference existed—so this was their version of an emergency stairwell. I groaned as my head throbbed with a flood of information I wasn’t expecting. I pressed my fingers to my temple. I closed my eyes, focusing on the troubling sensation. Straining, I pushed the feeling away from my mind. That was better. I opened my eyes, gasping when I saw the others collapse to the ground. I must’ve pushed that sickening feeling onto them. I latched my mind onto them, straining, trying to wake them up. Nothing. I twisted my ring with my thumb, trying again. Still, nothing. I focused on them individually but found a strange block on Jedi and Carmen. I could get into basic information and thoughts, as I’d done to get their names, but anything more to wake them up was proven impossible, or at least difficult. But even if that block wasn't there, my efforts on Carla and George weren’t proven to be any more successful. Something around here had to help, right? I sat beside their unconscious bodies, criss-cross, and closed my eyes. I focused on my breathing and put into effect some of the advice Carla gave me earlier. I tried expanding my mind to find anything that could help with the situation. I felt my consciousness stretch out over the entire building, a large, elaborate mansion, as I could now tell. I heard that screaming girl again, but pushed her aside. I’d already figured she was most likely a memory. A sudden pull caused my eyes to fly open. I jumped to my feet, spinning to run in the opposite direction.

Empty - from The Secret Portal Part One (Robbie POV)

“You thinking about something?” Akash asked at the table as I stared at the bowl in front of me. “Have you ever thought about how cereal is like the skeleton of milk?” “You’re implying that milk is meat, and I don’t like that at all.” “Milk has fat—yes, I’m implying that it’s meat.” “So milk is cereal that’s, like, boneless?” “Exactly.” “However, some people have cereal dry, which means that the cereal is a fatless skeleton, but we add fat if we feel the need.” “Does that make the bowl the flesh?” “Of course it does.” “So we’re eating the insides right out of the skin?” Akash paused. “Yes.” “Terrifyingly morbid,” I said, taking a huge bite of my soggy bowl-innards. “Some people have fruit in their cereal,” Akash pointed out. “What are those?” “Organs?” I suggested. “Sure, why not?” “I just realized something even more morbid.” “What?” “So we keep the bones in its own separate box, we keep the meat refrigerated in a liquid state, it’s already disemboweled, and we keep its empty flesh sack in a dark room with other flesh sacks.” “What the heck are you guys talking about?” I looked up to see Sammy in the doorway, her hair a mess from just getting out of bed. “You’re up early,” I noted. Sammy shrugged. “I got hungry.” “You want some disemboweled innards served directly in the flesh sack?” Akash asked, holding up his bowl. Sammy pressed her eyebrows together in a disturbed expression. “I think I’ll get toast.”

Cold - from The Secret Portal Part One (Maddie POV)

“How would a tiger be useful to shift into?” “Camoflauge,” I answered. “Their colors and stripes are almost an illusion to keep them hidden from their prey. But snow leopards are better hunters. And better jumpers, though Bengal tigers can jump pretty well.” “Which is more useful? A snow leopard or a tiger?” “If it was cold enough, easily a snow leopard. They’re more efficient and powerful. But I think tigers would be applicable to other situations. Snow leopards also have giant paws that work like snowshoes so they don’t leave deep indentations in the snow.” “I thought you researched tigers this week,” said Liam. “I kinda got on a research rabbit hole on big cats,” I admitted. “Cheetahs would be useful if I needed to run really fast and accelerate quickly. But the non-retractable claws would be painful. Cheetahs have to be careful with when they use their speed. Lions would be useful, but unfortunately lionesses work better in groups and while male lions are better in one-v-one fights, I don’t know if it’s possible to morph into another sex at will.” Liam smiled. “I wish it were that easy. But unfortunately, it’s rather difficult to do. But I mean, if you get really good, it’s possible.” He stood, clapping his hands. “Okay, I think that small tiger, the Sumatran, would be a good place to start. Just so you don’t strain yourself.” “Do you know what Carla meant my reaching inside myself to my inner animal?” I asked as I stood. “Hm.” Liam pursed his lips. “Well, humans have their own instincts, and so do animals. According to the research I did on animal morphians, you can adopt the instincts of an animal if you’re triggered by a heightened emotional state or you stay in the form for too long. Do you remember how I described it to you?” I nodded. “Feel all the atoms in my body. Think about them changing and rearranging. My DNA unwrapping and tying together in new ways. Taking and removing atoms from other places to change mine.” “And isn’t noting your own atoms similar enough to reaching inside yourself?” “I guess.” I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. I prepared for the pain.

#writing blog #writers on tumblr #writing community #writing ask game #find the word #writers of tumblr #writing on tumblr #writeblr #writeblr community #my writing #wip excerpt #my knight in leather #My Knight in Leather excerpt #My Knight in Leather Ever's POV

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kiridarling · 4 years ago

Text

"𝐒𝐈𝐌𝐎𝐍 𝐒𝐀𝐘𝐒."

izuku midoriya | friends older brother!izuku + college student!reader + f!reader + squirting + size kink + more! minors dni! does this count? as dark content?

— 2.4k words

"It's simple: I'll stuff you full with two fingers, but they only do what simon says. Understand?"

“[Y/N?]”

“Uh, hey Izuku!” You smile, grip tightening around the strap to your bag. Izuku fills the doorway, broad shoulders kissing both sides of the frame, and you can’t help but feel minuscule in comparison. “Kota around?”

Izuku shakes his head, peering over his shoulder for a second before returning his attention to you with a click of his tongue. "Uh, no I think he's out with Eri. They should be back soon though...it's been a few hours."

"Shit," you curse under your breath. Your friend's older brother smiles in apology, biceps straining under his white tee.

"You need something?"

"Yeah," you nod, forcing your eyes back onto his, instead of the broad chest presented at eye-level. "Just my precalc book."

Izuku waits a second, thinking, before his palm claps against the doorframe and he's walking deeper into the house. "Come on in, then! I'm sure he won't mind."

You step into the house after him, and it's...weird. Weird being with your Kota's older brother without Kota there, because despite the thousands of times you've been in your best friend's house and as well as you know the greenette, you and Izuku have never been alone.

"Find it?"

You've been rummaging through Kota's room for a solid ten minutes and somehow still empty-handed, moving slowly in fear you'll see something you can't unsee. And hey, with Kota and Eri dating, anything's possible.

"No," you sigh, ready to give up rather than find a strap-on. "It's fine. I can just come to get it tomorrow or something."

"How soon do you need it?" The greenette asks, his forearms leaning against his younger brother's dresser. You take a seat on Kota's comforter instead, silently hoping you'll find your book by accidentally breaking your tailbone against the damn thing; you're a little disappointed when all your ass comes in contact with is a plush mattress.

"Like, tonight," you grieve, knowing that tomorrow morning, your math grade will suffer severely. "'S fine though. There's always another test."

Izuku snorts at that, crossing the room to take a seat next to you. The bed whines under his weight but doesn't collapse, and you feel a little bad to say you're surprised. Voice full of reminiscence, he sighs, "Ah, the college days."

You giggle, "You act like they're lightyears behind you."

"They might as well be," the greenette shrugs, before reaching behind your waist to steal a pillow. "Couldn't tell you a thing I learned."

You shrug trying to remember the last time you’ve felt prepared for a test, “Neither can I.”

Izuku chuckles and nods, though you’re convinced it’s because he has nothing to say. An awkward silence takes possession of the room by the neck, and you shift awkwardly, unsure of what to say that could give you an excuse to leave, or at least redirect his strange yet heavy gaze. As Izuku licks his lips, you notice how close you two actually are, as he's big to the point where your shoulders almost brush, but not quite.

"How um, hows your boyfriend?"

You scoff at that, but you suppose it's been a while since you and the greenette have talked one on one—and the last time you had, you weren't single.

"Oh uh, he's fine, I guess," you brush it off with a shrug and a wave, cringing at the thought of how that ended. "I don't know. We broke up a while ago, so."

"Oh sorry!" Izuku flushes and throws a hand over his mouth, and you giggle.

"You're fine. He was an asshole anyway," you chuck a laugh, but it's not really that funny. Frankly, he's left too many emotional scars to count, along with the ones healing from past exes. "I...don't have a good reputation when it comes to picking boyfriends."

“So, I’ve heard—no offense,” he says sheepishly, though you don't blame him. You've definitely had a few surprise visits caused by a nasty break-up or two, knowing this is the place you'll probably find both of your best friends hiding out. When Izuku speaks again, it’s borderline awkward as his eyes dart around the room, cheeks puffed and lips pursed in apprehension. “Found...anyone new?”

You frown, “Anyone new.”

“Yeah!” Izuku exclaims, and it’s almost encouraging. “Like a new boyfriend.”

“Oh,” you laugh, shaking your head. “Um, no. Like I said, I don’t have much luck with that type of stuff.”

Izuku snorts, rolling his eyes before he’s adjusting himself to lay on the pillow, half of his body upright. “I bet you do. You might not realize it, but you do.”

Now it’s your turn to snort and roll your eyes, leaning back on your hands with a huff. "You're just being nice, Izuku."

"No, seriously!" He props himself higher so you can see he really is serious, evergreen eyes locked and deadset, "Like—okay, and this might be a TMI or something, but how do they, y'know, and then be dicks, y'know?"

"They don't."

"They don't...what?"

"They don't...make me cum," you heave with great depression, despite the seemingly surface-level complaint. With wrists tightening around your ankles, you hate uncomfortably in the silence, and watch Izuku's mouth open and close, before it opens and closes again.

"Like...never?"

"No." You give him a weird look.

"But what about your last boyfriend? I thought he—"

"I don't know what you're looking for, Izuku," you chuckle, shaking your head. The greenette seems more pained than he is shocked, eyes wide with a big fat pout in place of a neutral face. "It's not like I haven't had an orgasm before. Just...not with someone else."

"That's not the same!" Izuku defends, slowly becoming more animated than you've ever seen him. "It's like...more passionate with another person, you know? And that makes everything a whole lot hotter."

"Thanks," you huff, mood souring more than it already has. Izuku's mouth stills once he realizes what he's essentially bragging, guilt clouding his face. As you exhale out of your nose, you can't escape feeling bad for snapping. "Look. I'm perfectly fine with being the only person to be able to make myself cum. It's not that deep."

"You sound like you expect no one to be able to," Izuku snorts with a raised eyebrow, shoulders bumping against yours. "You've just...had bad boyfriend luck. That doesn't mean no one's capable of doing it."

"Well," you click your tongue bitterly, because you've heard all of this before, and you're utterly tired of hearing it. "They've been able to make all their exes orgasm. And it's not like it even matters, relationships aren't abou—"

"I could do it."

"I—" you blink, shaking your head at the pure audacity of his request? Suggestion? Comment? Whatever the fuck. "Excuse me?"

"I—wait, listen," Izuku rushes like you're getting ready to book it the fuck out of there, sitting upright so his body is turned to yours. "You're...it's...I've been told I'm good with my fingers, right?"

And what a way to start a story.

"Izuku, in the nicest way, every guy is like this," you scoff, "He thinks he's all that just because a chick or two said you made her feel really good. I don't need to fake another orgasm."

"You won't have to," Izuku purrs cockily, leaning forwards on his hands and making you wonder where all of this is coming from. "Let's play a game of simon says, yeah?"

"Simon—" your chest collapses with a giggle of pure disbelief, "I'm not that much younger than you, you know."

"I wouldn't be offering if you were," the greenette reasons, eyes growing dark slowly, if any. "Yes or no?"

"What's the catch?" You bargain and Izuku huffs a laugh. You can feel it on your face.

"No catch, Pretty," he hums, and you can feel the vibrations in your fingers. "It's simple: I'll stuff you full with two fingers, but they only do what simon says. Understand?"

You gulp as Izuku lifts a hand—and a very large one, at that—and it's jagged and rough with scars and bulky knuckles. His free hand makes you grab his wrist and you're fingertips barely touch, but you’re pulling his hand south by your own volition.

“Gotta take your pants off first,” he chuckles, and you flush red. That would be helpful, yes.

It doesn't take long before they're off though, flung towards a corner somewhere—and this is when you realize that maybe, you shouldn't do this on Kota's bed.

"Izuku maybe we shoul—"

But before you can say anything else, he's pushing your panties to the side and shoving both fingers into you at once, eyebrows folding as he groans under his breath from the sensation.

"So wet already? Clearly, someone likes this more than they let on."

"I—what the fuck happened to simon says!" You yelp, but his fingers don't move. Izuku just beams like the deceptive asshole he is.

"Game starts now," is all he says, and you're huffing, propping yourself up on your elbows. Izuku's fingers might as well have knocked the wind out of you, lungs struggling to find room to breathe as he curls his fingers to tap directly onto your g-spot with worrying precision.

"Simon says um, move please," you grunt out. Izuku's fingers stay still, and you frown, kicking him in the thigh. "Hey, I sai—"

"You gotta be more specific than that, Pretty,” he says with a grin. You snarl. "Tell me what you want me to do to you."

"I..." you start, but it's fucking embarrassing, and you know Izuku feels you twitch around him when you say: "Can you um, fuck me with your fingers."

He doesn't move.

"Simon says fuck me with your fingers, asshole," you grunt with narrowed eyes, though they widen when he starts to pump his fingers in and out, chuckling when you shiver from the dexterity.

Except, his fingers move painfully slow, and you find yourself gritting your teeth at the speed when he doesn't make an effort to go any faster. You click your tongue—he's really going to make you request everything, isn't he?

"Simon says faster," you growl with a challenge burning in your eyes, and Izuku meets them with equal fire, fingers finally forgetting their torturous pace for a much quicker one. Finally.

"Fuck! Simo—simon says right t-there," your legs spread wider and Izuku makes more room for himself in between. He hums with dark eyes as you whimper and whine his name, writhing in his younger brother's sheets like they belong to him—like you belong to him.

"I wanna touch you all the time, you know," Izuku grunts before cursing at the sight of your wetness around his fingers. "Make you feel good, make you mine. I don't think Kota would approve, though."

"We don—" you wheeze and he places a hand next to your head, towering over you. The angle only gets better, your hands digging into the sheets as Izuku's fingers curl just right. "We don't have to tell him."

Izuku chuckles at that, chest rumbling as he leans in closer to the point where your noses nearly touch. "You dirty fucking girl."

You moan at that, hips bucking into his hand. You're so close and yet you need more, something else to push you over the edge for good. With a whimper behind a bitten lip, you say, "S-Simon says rub my clit."

Izuku's thumb falls upon your clit and you squeal from the amount of initial pressure, thighs jolting from the white-hot waves that pump through your bloodstream as his thumb moves in small, ever-quickening circles that have you gripping for Kota's comforter for dear life.

"Iz—Izuku I'm gonna—g-gonna cum," you pant, and he's ripping his hands away before you can even reach a hint of the edge. You glare at him out of pure and utter betrayal, and he beams.

"Simon didn't say, did he?"

Your mouth flies open before your brain has time to process it all, "Simon says make me cum, p-please, I need to—fuck!"

Izuku's stuffing you full with his fingers in an instant and his thumb returns to its rightful place.

"Yeah? You gonna cum for me, Pretty?" His hands somehow find the energy to speed up to the point where the clap of his palm against your pussy fills the room, slowly being replaced by a lewd squelch as you tighten around him. He chuckles when all you can do is whimper, grappling for his big shoulders as he says, "Oh, yes she is. So fucking close I can feel it."

You let out a broken moan and in a blink you're squirting, body buzzing as you make a big wet mess of Kota's sheets. It doesn't even register how screwed you two are because you're too busy wading waist-deep in the sea of Izuku's eyes, chest heaving in time with his as he gives you a look of pure awe. Not at what you've done, per se, but at you, and that's when you understand it—the passion.

"We should uh, probably clean up," Izuku flushes as he chuckles, cheeks pressing into the crescents of his face, and you find yourself smiling along with him. With a final click, he pulls his fingers out, gesturing to a circular wet spot on his now see-through shirt. "You made quite a mess."

Fuck the passion.

You shove your fists into his chest and Izuku laughs, pushing your hands away with his one dry free hand, wiping the wet one on Kota's sheets.

"Izuku!" You gasp, looking at the new and improved addition to your mess. The greenette shrugs.

"What? We're going to have to clean it anyway," he shrugs before assuming the dry spot to your right and nestling his forearms in the pillow to peck you on the forehead. Then he freezes.

"I uh...am I allowed to do that?"

You roll your eyes, grabbing him by his squirt-soaked shirt to pull him into a kiss. Izuku hums at that, suppressing the urge to smile as his big hands find their way to your waist. He's an annoyingly good kisser

"No, you're not," you say with swollen lips once you pull away. Izuku grins, teeth digging into his bottom lip as his eyes flutter to yours for a moment, before they're staring into your soul again.

"I like you," he boldly states, albeit quietly, like he's talking to your eyes and nothing else. "Like, a lot."

"I—" You start, but you're interrupted by a click of a lock and the sound of the front door opening. Shit.

"Oi! We're home, Izuku!"

#— 𝐈𝐙𝐔𝐊𝐔 #deku smut #izuku smut #midoriya smut #bnha smut #bnha imagines

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redheadspark · 3 years ago

Text

Don’t Cry No Tears ❄️

Shang Chi x Ex Black Widow Reader

Summary: Shangqi shows his girlfriend, an ex-Black Widow, the true wonders of the first snowfall of the Season.

A/N: I just CAN’T let go of this Shang Chi and Ex Black Widow pairing! I might make it a series, who knows!

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Seasons weren’t that big of a deal to you. You were accustomed to blend into them when you were a Widow in the past, having to adapt to any weather to situation.

Yet now you didn’t have to, it was like you were seeing it through a new set of eyes.

Summer time was terrible: too hot for you to just sit and try to cool down. And you burned like a lobster.

Springtime was a nightmare on your allergies, sniffling all the time and feeling heavy in the head.

Fall was weird: Some days it was hot and some days it was cold. The orange and yellow leaves weren't so bad though.

Winter was a different beast.

Something about the cold made you remember your old life as a Widow. You had no idea if it was the bite of the cold on your skin, or just being in the vast wasteland of white that made you think of your old ways.

Now once again it was Winter at ten Avengers Compound, you were waking up early one morning to the soothing touches and kisses across your nose and cheeks. Although you were in a deep sleep, you knew those touches and kisses instantly. You reminded yourself every morning when you woke up: Your were safe, you were free, and you were with him.

Shangqi, the light in your ever darkness.

“Wake up, sweetheart,” he hummed against your forehead with his lips. You grumbled.

“What is it?” You groaned, wanting to sleep in some more. Yet Shangqi tutted and pulled the covers down adn away from you. You glared at him, seeing his handsome and yet playful gaze at you.

“It’s snowing outside!” He sounded like a child on Christmas. It was cute, although too early for you to indulge in.

“You can go jump in yourself,” You said in a grumble, yet you were getting a bit pliant as he wrapped his arms around you to gently pull you up from your spot in the bed. You sighed, becoming too easy to give in with him. You had to wonder when you got soft and a pushover.

Yet when you looked in the eyes on your boyfriend, the man who took your darkness and brought it to light, you knew why.

Shangqi merely grinned at him, that smile would make any icy heart melt.

“It’s better to enjoy it now before it turns to ice and gets uncomfortable.” He reminded you gently as he pushed your hair out of your eyes with his fingers, “And I don't wanna go out there all alone and enjoy it by myself. I’d rather be with my beautiful and amazing girlfriend,”

“What a dilemma for you,” You joked with him with small sarcasm, yet your smile was growing on your face as he was peering into your eyes and still holding you close. You finally sighed, Shangqi chuckling as he saw he won the battle.

“Fine,” you complied, “But I’m coming inside when I start to freeze and turn into a popsicle,”

“Deal,” he hummed in victory.

You both threw on your winter clothes, you learned how to work with layers when you used to be a Widow in the past and you had to move fast. Although you had no mission now, you still used layers and nothing too heavy.

Shangqi was all too excited to go out, waiting patiently for you as your braided your hair back and threw on your gloves. You never felt rushed with Shangqi, it was the many things that you loved about him.

Once you two were finally ready to take on the snow, Shangqi took your hand in his and held open the door for you to the outer courtyard of the Avengers compound.

The cold hit your skin first, having you recoil for a moment before the blinding whiteness of the scenery around you almost blinded you. It took you a moment to adjust.

Yet once you did, it was breathtaking.

The snow covering the entire area looked so soft and peaceful, like some kind of wonderland as the light snowflakes were cascading down onto the ground. You felt a few snowflakes touching your skin, the cooling touch against your red cheeks was sensation. It was so quiet, quiet and serene to drink in.

It made you realize you never once, not in your memory, you recall enjoying a soft moment in the snow ever in your life. You never had a moment to pause and drink in the serenity and the gentleness of the first snowfall.

Something inside of you, the feeling of peace and almost safety was going over you like a snowy blanket.

Shangqi’s hand in yours squeezed slightly, having you look over at him and seeing him peer down at you with his soft smile and loving gaze in his eyes. You saw the snowflakes in his dark hair, on his eyelashes, and even on his cheeks as you two were looking at each other.

“You look beautiful in the snow, sweetheart,” He hummed to you, making it sound so simple to say but it was so much for you to hear. You grinned widely, leaning over to kiss him on the cheek before you looked down at the powder on the ground in front of your boots.

Reaching down, you took a handful and stood back up, cupping the cold substance in your hands and feeling it already starting to melt in your warm palm. You giggled.

“It’s so soft,” You hummed, then looking at Shangqi with a mischievous raised eyebrow and grin. Shangqi’s smile faded away, almost looking worried.

“Don’t you dare--” Before he could finish, he threw the snow at him. He only got a bit on his face, dodging the rest as you laughed. The laugh ran out in the courtyard, a hearty one as you felt so whole there, feet deep in the snow and with your boyfriend and lover. Shangqi playfully glared at you.

“Oh, you’re dead!” He said, you bolting away from him as he reached down to get his ammunition.

This went on for a few solid minutes, the two of you in a snowball fight. Shang Chi may of had the upper hand with speed and being able to dodge the snowballs you threw, but you were skilled in aiming precisely where you wanted to hit.

The only sounds were hard were the crunching of snow from your feet and you digging up snowballs, and your laughter echoing off the walls of the Avenger building.

The snow was starting to chill you after a while, yet you had no heart to stop with Shang as you two were circling each other like it was a game fo cat and mouse.

Shangqi finally got the upper hand with you, tackling you to the snow ground and your shrieks were hearing in the air as you fell into the pillow of cold. Shangqi hovered over you, a grin plastered on his face and laughter on his lips. You were laughing too, sinking into the snow and feeling the cold sink into your jacket and your hair as you peered up at him.

For a moment, you thought of him as an angel.

Shangqi was an angel. He saved you from being alone, being in the dark and shut away from the world.

You paused under him, gazing at him with your rosy cheeks and your red tipped nose.

Shangqi was always there for you since you left that old life. He show it that it was oaky to have a shitty past but a promising future. He expressed to you that a family can be found, not just made.

Most importantly, that even the severely broken can be mended.

Shangqi mended you, thoroughly and completely.

You leaned up to kiss him, his cold lips against yours spread warmth into your blood stream as you both held the kiss in the snow pile you both were perched in. Shangqi leaned into you, never one to stray from a kiss from you as you sighed against his lips and embrace. You felt one of his hands touch your neck, making you shiver from feeling the ice cold fingers. Yet you leaned in closer, not wanting to be far away from him.

You had no idea if it was the snow that made you act like this, or that you were in a simple state of mind of peace and sanity, but your love for Shangqi was getting deeper and wider.

“I love you,” you hummed against his lips, feeling him smile as you opened your eyes and gazed at him. Shangqi looked back, pure love in his eyes as he was searching your orbs.

“And as much as I want to make out on the snowy ground with you,” You started, seeing Shangqi laugh and lean down to rest his forehead against your shoulder, “I am officially cold. Let’s go inside and warm up,”

“As you wish, my Milady,” Shangqi hummed in a face British Accent, getting up and pulling you up to then have you in his arms, bridal style. You almost squealed from the movement, sighed in a smile as your arms went around his neck.

“I can make us some hot apple cider and we can sit in front of a fire,” He hummed as he walked the pair of your towards the door, “And we can find other ways to warm each up….”

You giggled and slightly blushed, though Shangqi showed no shame in what he said

“I’m just giving you options,” he reasoned.m, “But cider and a fire first!”

“Sounds heavenly,” you replied in a grin, resting your head against his chest. You took one last look at the snow atmosphere around you, feeling beyond content. All it took was a few minutes in the snow to change you worldview of Winter.

In the past, Winter was bleak and forgettable.

Now with Shangqi, you weren't going to forget anytime soon.

The End.

#shang chi x reader #shang chi #shang chi and the legend of the ten rings #simu liu #simu liu writing #mcu #mcu fanfiction #mcu writing #marvel cinematic universe #marvel cinematic universe fanfiction #marvel fanfiction #marvel fan writing #fanfiction #writing #mcu phase 4 #phase 4

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weepinglevi · 4 years ago

Text

patience is a virtue

summary: college!au. all aged up. eren and reader continue with their sexual escapades. find part one here! warnings: 18+ minors dni. dirty text messages, dirty talk. dom!eren and bratty reader (i suppose?). throat fucking and semi-public sex. (no p in v tho) word count: around 3.5k A/N: i have a love/hate relationship with this eren ahaha, he's been ruling my brainrot ever since the last part so i hope you enjoy! there will be a part three eventually, so be on the lookout for that! enjoy your read and feedback is greatly appreciated! xx

you awake to your phone vibrating somewhere next to you. the hope of it only being a one-time occurrence quickly proven to be false as it just wouldn't stop. brr-brr. a second of silence. brr-brr. pause. brr-brr.

taking a mental note to never go to sleep again without turning off your phone, you roll over to your other side and try to ignore it. you could simply answer the texts, but that meant you'd have to open your eyes. and that whoever was texting you would win this weird battle you've just come up with in your head.

"if you don't pick up your goddamn phone, i'll smack you over the head with it," sasha groans from the other side of your shared dorm, words coming slurry with her tiredness.

brr-brr.

"i could also stick it up your ass, your decision," a pillow comes flying to your head, serving as enough of a warning for you to sit up in your bed, rubbing the sleep from your eyes.

"quit moaning, i'll turn it off now," you yawn, feeling around your bed for your phone, "you never hear me complaining about the shit you do in the middle of the night."

"that's because my shit is funny and not fucking annoying," she scoffs, followed by a muted thump as she is sinking back down into her pillows. sasha's way of ending the conversation.

you find your phone half-tucked underneath your pillow, the display already lighting up again. someone is desperate for attention, you think to yourself and unlock your phone with an annoyed sigh. the messages were coming from an unknown number.

thinking about your wet pussy. this is eren, btw. historia gave me your number. i told her you wouldn't mind you don't mind, do you?

in a matter of seconds, your heart is beating in your throat once more, just like this afternoon in that godforsaken computer lab. ears growing hot at his words, you could almost imagine the sound of him laughing at you again. with trembling fingers, you scroll down further.

anyway, let's do it again sometime i told you. i'll never let you forget about how you moaned my name i'm also not forgetting about how badly i want to fuck that pretty mouth of yours, so it's a win-win see ya, then

staring down at your phone, you don't know if you should answer him. and even if you would answer his texts, what the hell should you say? "fucking bastard," the words escaping your mouth before even realizing that you'd better keep quiet. the only thing that could make this situation any worse was if sasha were to wake up again.

scratch that, you think as you see eren's new messages.

how badly do you want to suck my cock? you looked really hot today, covered in my cum what, you're shy again?

there are two ways this could go: either you stand up, put on some clothes, and then go to eren's dorm to let hell rain upon him - or simply mute your phone and ignore him. deciding to go with the latter, you lie back down and save his number as "fuckhead", a small grin forming on your face. if he wants to be childish, then you can be, too.

the display still lighting up at a steady pace, you have to fight the urge to open his other messages. to physically prevent yourself from grabbing your phone again, you put your hands between your thighs and sigh. what the hell have i gotten myself into?

"so, who am i gonna have to teach some manners today?", sasha asks in the morning, "because there are only two valid reasons for sending that many texts in the middle of the night," she sits up in her bed and bends over to reach for her phone, "either someone's dead or there's a food sale."

cringing at the thought of having to read the countless other messages eren has sent throughout the night, you try to laugh at her comment, "of course, when there's food involved, you're all for it."

"girl's gotta eat," she claims, thankfully being too distracted by something on her phone to notice your strange behavior, "i'm gonna be back later than usual today, connie wants me to be his wingman again."

starting to go off on a tangent about how connie should just get a dating app already, sasha's words become more of background noise to you. you want to know what he wrote. what he has in store for you. at the same time, you curse yourself out. you're turning into a headless chicken and all of it because of eren fucking yeager?

you nod here and there, offering her a "yes" at what you believe to be fitting moments, desperately hoping she doesn't catch up on your restlessness. all the while the two of you are getting ready for the day. this goes on for a few more minutes and you have no clue what she's talking about now, so you decide to grab your phone and stand up.

"i'm gonna go for a run around campus, you want coffee?" you blurt out, interrupting her monologue. the device in your hand feels as if it's burning through your skin. slipping into your trainers, you're already halfway out the room, her perplexed "uh- yes, please," being muffled by the door closing behind you.

it's still warm outside - not as hot as yesterday, but warm enough for you to be glad to have forgotten your cardigan earlier. you let out a deep breath, trying to clear your mind. even though you told sasha you'd be out for a run, you walk at a slow pace.

some people are already wandering around campus, most of them on their way to a lecture. at this time in the morning, everyone has their heads full with their own worries so no one notices you slowly making your way off-campus.

arriving at a little park surrounded by trees, you sit down on the bench farest off. you notice your heart fluttering like the wings of a hummingbird when pulling the phone out of your back pocket. fuck him, you think once again while typing in your code. fuck him for making me feel this way.

12 unread messages.

didn't seem all too shy when i had my hand wrapped around your throat no need to play hard to get when i already had you if that makes sense? haven't fucked you yet doesn't mean i won't get to fuck you

all you want is to feel appalled by these messages. to screenshot them and send them to the dean. maybe even to his mother. sickened with yourself though, you already feel the familiar warmth creeping up your body, curling up in your abdomen.

i know you want it, too how fucking needy you were for me getting yourself off in public to the thought of me maybe you can tell me what exactly you were thinking of? gonna make sure to let your dreams come true, princess

pet names? you clench your fist at the thought of eren leaning over you, breathing the word princess into your ear. you have an inkling that he'd say it mockingly; spitting it out whilst gathering your hair in a ponytail, arching your back forcefully, and slamming his length into you without mercy.

no. you hate pet names. at least, you've always hated them.

i'm gonna find out if you're ignoring me right now remember, you're not the best actress. fucking suck at it, actually wouldn't want to be punished now, would we?

his last message echoed in your head. still coming to terms with the fact of what happened yesterday, now you have to deal with a whole new revelation: eren yeager being a cocky motherfucker pushing all the right buttons for you. even though you want to blast his ass for this, the mere thought of him being near you again is too sweet of an imagination.

you want to play this game, too. for whatever reason keep on riding this high, and you just know that no one could do it quite as well as eren can. somehow you can only imagine taking him on this ride with you, no one else.

so, in that manner you decide to ignore his messages. if he's desperate enough to keep on sending them in the middle of the night, you're sure it won't be long until he sends another text. and it would give him enough reason to try and punish you, whatever that might entail – you're excited to find out. fucking nervous, too. but then again, who wouldn't be?

you stand up and put your phone in your back pocket, a sense of excitement surrounding your steps as you turn left to make your way to the nearest coffee shop.

"something tells me you're ignoring me," of course, the moment eren's voice comes up behind you, you fucking flinch like a little bird that's been scared away, "mostly because i've seen you reading the messages, but what do i know?"

you turn to see him clutching his heart dramatically, "don't play with my feelings like this," he swoons, bringing one hand to his forehead. he's laughing again, all white teeth and bright smiles – you realize this is the kind of eren you rarely get to see. not the cocky bastard he normally portrays; right now, he seems to be a happy-go-lucky kind of guy, just enjoying himself. still, you want to show him that you can play just as well as he can.

crossing your arms in front of your chest, you slightly raise a brow, trying your hardest to not look as nervous as you feel. it's a lost cause though because you can already feel the tips of your ears glowing with heat again. can't things go my way for once? just once? you think and chew the inside of your cheek. you felt so sure of yourself just moments ago. how the hell can he have this sort of effect on you?

suddenly, his whole demeanor changes. before, he seemed laid-back, entertained by the game he played with you. now he leans forward, hands in the pockets of his jacket and an almost cruel smile forming on his lips, "don't try to challenge me in this. you'll lose."

you know that you should feel frightened. terrified, even. he's looking like a lion preparing to jump the antelope, a sense of alarming calmness around him that's causing the small hairs on your neck to stand up. but alas, the way he's looking at you seems to have the same effect on you his scent has.

"i told you not to ignore me," eren says and takes a few steps closer to you, "yet here you are, doing it again." the chuckle leaving his lips a stark contrast to his stern gaze, still trained on you. somehow, you feel awfully small again - still not frightened, though. you stare right back at him, tilting your head slightly as if you wanted to say "so what?"

"are you seriously that desperate to be punished?"

better now than never, you think and once again place a courtly smile on your lips, "seems like it."

for a split second, you see eren's smug look turn into a genuine smile. realizing that you're up for his game, he lets out a smooth whistle, "you do surprise me."

"if you wouldn't always be so full of yourself, i'm sure you'd have recognized this sooner," you can feel the confidence growing in yourself again. clinging on to it, you take a step toward him, "i'm full of surprises."

"oh, yeah? i bet you are," from the corner of your eye, you can see him lifting his hand. before thinking twice about it, you bat it away, "i'm not one for public displays of affection."

oh, it is on– eren's smirk turns into a full-fledged grin as he takes a grip of your wrist, "you sure about that?" lifting your hand to his face, for a short moment you think he's going to suck on your fingers again. but all he does is place a faint kiss on the back of your hand, "didn't seem like it yesterday."

"you weren't supposed to see."

"but i'm so glad i did," he leans forward, the two of you standing so close you can feel his breath on your face, "or else we wouldn't have this kind of fun right now."

still having a hold of your hand, he lifts his other to your jaw, gently tracing his thumb across your lower lip, "you looked so pretty in your skirt yesterday."

taking a leap of faith, you grab his hand, holding it in place and letting your tongue run across the tip of his thumb before biting down playfully. there's a hiss and then eren pulls away and grabs your arm, "come with me."

finally, you think and let him guide you to wherever he wants, let's have some fun, then.

on your way out of the park, you pass jean and marco. even though they stand to greet eren, he just raises his hand whilst not breaking his pace, "gotta go, have an assignment to work on."

"never seen you that determined, but go off," jean laughs.

before you know it, you're inside one of the countless maintenance sheds. pushing you against the wall, eren's movements seem to become more and more erratic by the second. pinning your arms over your head, he's looking down at you, breathing heavily. "you have no idea what you just got yourself into," licking his lips, he chuckles.

"oh, but i think i actually do," you smile innocently, fucking glad to have found your normal self again. admittedly, eren threw you off your game since yesterday – but it's just going to play into your hands now. he won't see it coming until it's hitting him straight in the face; that you're just as messed up as he seems to be.

"then prove it," he breathes against your ear, "tell me how badly you want it."

the stuffy air inside the dimly lit shed doesn't help with keeping eren's scent away from you. being so close to him, looking up into his shadowed face and right into his dilated eyes; you're like putty in his hands. you try to move forward, to touch him in some way because you just know that he'll feel so good under your skin.

"now now, princess," he moves even closer, wedging you between himself and the wall, "how about we learn some patience, first?"

you nod, but then grind up against his thigh, hissing through your teeth, "i worry i'll be a real handful." you know you could very well move your hands, too – eren seems to still be testing the waters as to how far he can go with you. but with him actually letting you grind on him; you decide to play into his hands.

your breaths grow quicker as you keep on, pace becoming erratic. all you want is to get rid of your track pants – come to think of it, what you actually want is eren under you whilst you continuously bounce on his cock. you want to hear him call you princess and immediately after call you his little whore because that's exactly what you are.

eren has a little smile on his lips and you know you should ask yourself why – because you're doing exactly what he has forbidden you to do – but you're too far gone. the heat growing, you feel your knees buckle but he's holding you up; one hand now resting on your waist for support. you're so close –

and then he pulls away from you, nearly causing you to topple over. chest heaving, you place your hands on your knees for balance, "what the fuck was – "

"patience is a virtue," interrupting you with a laugh, but his voice heavy with lust, "thought i might give you a lesson you're ought to remember."

you look up to see eren palming his erection through his pants, standing about an arm's length away from you, "but i have to admit, hearing you getting yourself off is fucking hot."

biting your teeth together, you straighten up and take a step toward him – only for him to click his tongue in disapproval, "you're gonna stay right there," tugging at his pants he raises his eyebrow, "i told you what i want, get on your knees for me."

"the fuck i will," you spit out and make a move again, grasping for his waistband. but eren is quick to take a hold of your hand and pushes you back to the wall, "come on, now, princess," he chuckles but his eyes are concentrated at you, "you want this, don't you?". he's asking for permission, the thought feeling very comforting to you. and also, very excited for what's about to come.

"of course, i do," you answer him earnestly, resting the back of your head against the wall, "or else i wouldn't be here."

"fantastic," he breathes, a little smile playing in the corners of his mouth, "then get down on your knees," placing his hands on your shoulders, weighing you down, "i won't ask again."

the change of tone in his voice has you nodding, slowly sinking onto your knees, you're bursting in anticipation. one hand finally pulling down his pants, he runs his other through your hair, then down your jaw until it comes to rest on your chin.

thumbing at your lower lip, he groans "do i have to be careful?"

you just shake your head no. then you break away from his gaze, fixing your eyes on the bobbing cock in front of you. it's tip leaking with precum already, you remember how badly you wanted to lick it away yesterday.

taking his cock at its base, you bend forward and slide your tongue around its head. the salty taste sending shudders down your spine, you make sure to lift your eyes again once you prepare to take it all down your throat. your other hand snakes up to his balls, slightly tugging them which earns you a moan from eren, and fuck, you're so wet at the sound alone, you let go of his cock and slide one hand down to your own center.

he gathers your hair in one hand, taking the base of his throbbing cock in the other, "bet this is what you thought of yesterday," he slowly but surely pulls your head in closer, "of how i fuck the words right out of you."

bucking your hips into your own hand, you can do nothing but whimper at his words. because yes, this is exactly what you imagined. he's only halfway in and you're already struggling to breathe, but not wanting him to stop you hold your breath and push down even further; trying desperately not to moan.

the tears in your eyes causing your vision to be blurry, you attempt to blink them away.

"shit – ", he's pumping into you now, rubbing the tears from your cheeks and then placing both his hands on your head, "you're doing so well – "

getting lost in his words, the fear of being caught is so far away; you finally moan around his cock. saliva soaking the hem of his shirt, you can't seem to take his whole length, no matter how hard you try. you're a fucking mess under him and the thought alone is nearly sending you over the edge.

he's trying to pull away now and you know he's close, so you snake your hand around his hip, hoping this is enough of a sign to him that if he dared to cum anywhere else than down your throat, you'd bite him.

"you really – " his voice is hoarse, "fuck – this is fucking perfect," he moans as he comes to the realization. leaning his arm against the wall behind you, he's fucking himself into your mouth, his panting and the sound of your choking filling the room.

you close your eyes to blink the tears away again, but eren pulls on your hair, "no – look at me."

with this the knot in your belly explodes, leaving you holding on to eren's hip as you ride the waves of electricity that are running through your body like lava.

"such a good little whore – " he's gone as well, holding your head in place as he's pumping his load down your throat, leaving you no other option than to swallow – which you eagerly do. you feel his legs shaking under your hands.

once again, eren hands you his shirt to clean your face. this time, you take it with a smile, noting that, "i still have your other one."

"don't worry, i'll come get it sometime when sasha's away," the two of you know exactly what this means – neither of you are planning on this to be over anytime soon.

"i'll let you know, then," you nod and stand up, hoping you don't look as well-fucked as you feel, and make your way to the door, "she's gone most of the time."

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