#me playing rio and songs from the big chair back to back on my record player earlier

[artificialqueens]

Tree House Kisses, Chapter 21 (Adorney) - Scorpio and Veronica

A/N: I am very excited to post this chapter, especially because I get to include this outstanding artwork by my HERO, @grinder-lector-art​. It’s the banner on my own blog and every time I look at it, I get a bit weepy-eyed. -V

Also, this seems like a good a time as any to plug the wonderful moodboards that Scorpio made to go along with this story (including a few specifically inspired by this chapter). If you’re looking for previous chapters, click here! Xoxo!

Chapter Summary: Everything falls apart. But it’s Courtney’s party, and she’ll cry if she wants to…

Chapter 21: It’s Raining on Prom Night

“Hello party guests!” Darienne called over the mic. “We are now serving dinner! Please help yourself to the lovely Mexican spread, over by the garden. It is all vegetarian and the trays marked with a pink heart are vegan. Don’t make that face, Adrian, you’ll be fine,” she chastised Adore’s brother. “Anyway, after you have your plate, the birthday girl has requested for you all to take your seats, as we have some entertainment, produced by Courtney and Thorgy and starring some people here tonight...I wonder who?!”

She stepped away from the mic, trying to help usher people towards the food, especially the slower-moving adults and the cheerleaders who were still on the dance floor fooling around.

“Mrs. Del Rio!” she beckoned Roy’s mom over. “Look, only a few people know this, but there’s a secret tray of chicken under the veggie skewers. For VIP carnivore guests only. Tell your husband.”

Aida laughed, giving her a hug. “Thank you, honey. Courtney already tipped us off, but we appreciate you looking out for us.”

“I do my best,” Darienne said, winking. She walked over to the main table where Courtney had a confused and mildly irritated look on her face. “Dari, there’s one too many seats here. Is it because of Raja? Didn’t we fix this? I don’t want an empty chair right up front, it’ll look weird--”

“Calm down, it won’t be empty.”

“Well, who’s sitting here?” Courtney put her hands on her hips.

Darienne imitated her pose, hands on her own hips, and leaned in. “It’s a surprise. Go get yourself some dinner, Miss Sweet Sixteen, and don’t worry about it!”

Courtney narrowed her eyes, and after a beat, backed down, pulling Adore and Roy with her over to the food. “I’ve got my eye on you, Darienne!”

Darienne laughed, shaking her head, and pulled out her phone.

-

“Courtney, everything is set up if you want to start the video,” Thorgy said.

“Okay…” she glanced down at her phone again. Still no answer from her dad. “Let’s just wait one more minute, until everyone is sitting.”

“Cool. Tell me when to hit the lights and then--”

“Shut up, Thorgy.” Darienne shoved him out of the way and stood behind Courtney’s chair, covering her eyes.

“Hey!”

“I told you there was a surprise, right? Well...it’s a little late due to flight delays and other extenuating circumstances, but...come on out!”

There were few delighted gasps and squeals from the table, and Courtney exclaimed, “What? What?!”

Darienne uncovered Courtney’s eyes and turned her chair around and standing there, in a black and white checkered dress, was Dela.

Courtney let out an ear-piercing shriek, jumping up and throwing her arms around her old friend. “DELA! OMIGOD! I can’t believe you’re here! How are you?! How’s Seattle?! I miss you! Oh my god!!” Courtney jumped up and down, hugging her tightly.

Dela laughed and hugged her back. “Happy Birthday, sweetie. I missed you too! Sorry I’m late…”

Courtney pulled away, teary-eyed, and sat Dela down beside her. Darienne laughingly moved the place card that had been there (Roy’s) and soon everyone was chattering excitedly and catching up, hearing about Dela’s new school in Seattle. Courtney promised to tell Dela the story in detail of how she and Roy became an official couple after the video.

“And we finally learned the truth of why Adore never liked me,” Bob joked, causing Adore to roll her eyes.

“Is it because you were so annoying?” Dela smiled.

“Absolutely,” Adore said.

“Not,” Bob added.

Courtney filled her in about the family that had moved into her house.

“See the pretty blonde over there next to Gia? Her name is Pearl. She’s really nice, actually. Adore tried to fuck her but that didn’t work out.”

Dela’s eyes widened and then she looked over at Bob, who made an “I told you so” face.

Adore scoffed, offended. “That is not how it went down.”

Courtney shrugged, smirking, and replied with a teasing, “Whatever you say,” and a hair toss.

Dela giggled. “So, I heard there’s about to be some intense walk down memory lane video? Is that true, because I love those, it’s my favorite part of every wedding, every Bat Mitzvah…”

“Yeah, we were about to play it.”

“Go for it! I better be in it though.”

Courtney grinned. “Oh, trust me. You are.”

-

As Adore suspected, the video was incredibly long and cheesy, filled with tons of photos of Courtney, Courtney with her family, Courtney with friends. There were also a lot more video clips than Adore anticipated - from recitals, home movies, including a gem from Courtney’s first day of kindergarten that she’d never seen.

“Courtney, love, please come out! Bob is waiting so nicely!” Karen cajoled.

“NO!” Courtney shouted, stomping her feet, refusing to come out the front door,

Bob, already tall and lanky at five years old, sat down on the front steps, head in his hands, clearly over Courtney and her temper tantrum.

“Courtney, why don’t you want to come out? You love school...” Karen wheedled.

She opened the door a crack and shouted, “I love PRESCHOOL! I don’t want to go to kindergarten! I’m too small! Everyone is going to be mean to me!” She slammed the door with a loud bang, continuing, “NO NO NO NO NO!”

Bob shook his head at the camera, rolling his eyes.

“Roy! Vanessa!” The camera flipped around to catch the Del Rio kids walking down the block, Karen at her wit’s end, begging them to help convince Courtney how much she’d love kindergarten.

Roy scampered inside and emerged 20 seconds later, holding Courtney’s hand, a big smile on her face.

“Roy’s gonna beat up anyone who’s mean to me!” Courtney announced happily, skipping down the steps.

Everyone at the party let out a collective “Awwwwww…”

Roy shook his head. “I was so full of shit. You think I was about to get in trouble by starting a fight my first day of school? That goes on your permanent record. Luckily for me, no one was mean to her.”

Courtney laughed and kissed him. “It was a comforting lie.”

On the screen, young Roy put his arm around Bob and led him and Courtney down the block towards the elementary school. “Kindergarten is great. You get to play all day and sing songs and do lots of fun stuff.”

“Did you like it, Roy?” Courtney asked, gazing up at him.

“I thought it was kind of boring, but I was already reading books. You’ll love it.”

Adore shook her head, chuckling, as the video faded back into photos. Even in first grade, Roy was a patronizing know-it-all.

-

Willam and Pearl dug into their food, plates piled high with enchiladas, Spanish rice, beans, grilled chicken that they’d begged off Adore’s mom, veggie skewers, salad, taquitos, and mini quesadillas, amused grins on both of their faces as they watched Courtney’s baby videos.

A video of Courtney and Adore learning to rollerblade played across the screen. A young Adore was pretty good, compared to a falling and pouting Courtney.

“Attagirl, Lesbian!” Willam cheered, earning a glare from Adore, three tables away.

Pearl leaned over and murmured, “Why does this feel like a wedding more than a birthday party?” Pearl glanced down into Willam’s lap to see him texting someone.

“Or a funeral,” Willam mumbled back, causing Pearl to laugh which was covered up by the chuckles from the crowd laughing at Adore having to hold Courtney’s hands to help her skate.

Willam slid his phone over to Pearl, to show her the texts he had been sending Adore all night. Most of them had been him insulting Adore on her horrible fashion choices during her preteen years. Pearl shook her head, snickering to herself as she shoved another mouthful of rice into her mouth.

“What y’all laughing at?” Alyssa whispered leaning forward on the table.

The screen started off black, a few girls could be heard talking. The camera shook, before a round face framed with red hair in pigtails popped into view.

“Okay, it’s on,” Darienne said before she ran off screen.

“Turn the music on!” someone hissed. Seconds later the music started and Adore ran into view, hair teased huge, in an animal print top and pleather pants. Followed by Courtney, in white gogo boots and a British flag dress.

“Ohhhh, shit!” Willam began cackling with glee.

And then the rest of the girls. April wore a black dress and stilettos, hair ironed flat. Dela was in track pants and a sports bra, and Darienne was in a little pink dress with white sketchers, sucking on a lollipop.

Yo, I'll tell you what I want, what I really, really want So tell me what you want, what you really, really want I'll tell you what I want, what I really, really want So tell me what you want, what you really, really want

Pearl’s mouth dropped open and Willam covered his mouth to hold in his laughter as they watched the girls prance around the room.

Darienne was a beat behind the rest of the girls, obviously missing steps, and clearly uncomfortable as Baby, comically overplaying the cutesy little girl thing to the point where it was nearly creepy. Dela and Courtney were the most enthusiastic, and seemed to know all the moves (with Courtney as a nearly manic Ginger and Dela really trying to sell Sporty’s “tomboy” vibe).

Watching a younger Adore, who was apparently Scary, prance around the room trying to keep up with Courtney and Dela was absolutely hilarious. Every time they had to turn, she would go the wrong way, at one point crashing into Dela and nearly knocking her over. And April’s imitation of Posh Spice, barely doing the moves at all, an air of “too cool” apathy only added to the overall disorganized vibe.

“This is soooo embarrassing,” Gia whispered to no one in particular, but everyone at the table heard her.

“Gurl,” Alyssa nodded.

WILLAM: Nice moves, you guys could have replaced the real spice girls

ADORE: Fuck off

PEARL: Was this professionally choreographed?

ADORE: Fuck. Offffff!

Adore glared at Willam and Pearl as they doubled over laughing, flipping her phone closed and crossing her arms. She watched them prance around on the screen and couldn’t help, but remember the arguments that took place just for this video to happen.

April, Adore, Courtney, Darienne and Dela had gathered at Courtney’s house and as they sat around the living room listening to the Spice Girls, Courtney suggested that they should make their own Wannabe video.  

“Oh! That’ll be so fun,” Bendela said, the other girls nodded excited about Courtney’s idea.

“I’ll go get the camera!” Courtney ran off.

“I’m Posh,” April said.

“I’m Ginger,” Adore quickly called.

“Don’t you think I should be Ginger? I mean I have red hair,” Darienne suggested and Adore made a face.

“You can be Scary,” Adore suggested.

“If we’re doing this, I think I should be Ginger, I have red hair, I’m the oldest. April should be Posh, Courtney should be Baby-”

“No, I wanna be Ginger,” Courtney rushed back into the living room with her Dad’s camera, interrupting Darienne. “I’m the biggest Spice Girls fan, and I love Geri, I--”

“Too late! I already called Ginger,” Adore said smugly.

Courtney’s mouth twisted up in anger, gripping the camera tightly; steam was practically shooting out of her ears. “Adore Delano you know I waited FIVE HOURS at the Glendale Galleria to get Geri Halliwell’s autograph, and I have the British flag dress, and I--”

“Blah blah blah, whatever Baby!”

Five minutes later and Adore and Courtney were still in a heated argument over who got to be Ginger.

April watched on in amusement, happy that no one was trying to take Posh away from her, Dela just wanted the arguing to be over and Darienne didn’t understand why they thought they were more Ginger Spice than her.

“It’s! Not! Fair!” Courtney stomped her foot, crossing her arms and pouting at Adore.

“Yes! It! Is!” Adore mocked Courtney stomping her foot and crossing her arms, “I called it first. So I’m Ginger.”

“If you’re anyone, you’re Sporty,” Courtney rolled her eyes.

Adore took a step back from Courtney, fuming, looking around the room to see the other girls’ reactions. Dela sat down next to Darienne, silently offering her snack to her.

Adore leaned to Courtney whispering, “I should have been Ginger and you know it.”

Courtney stuck her tongue out in response, before shaking her head, “I think you made a good Scary. And you’d have been good as Sporty, too.”

“What?! Now that I think about it, that was a totally homophobic suggestion,” Adore said.

“Hey, if it looks like a duck, and walks like a...well...”

Adore’s eyes bulged and her mouth opened in mock offense, and Courtney laughed, leaning over and kissing her forehead.

“I’m pretty sure I’d be the best choice for Ginger,” Darienne whispered to Dela, who nodded in agreement.

“Well, you’re the obvious Baby, Courtney! Come on!” Adore cajoled desperately.

“Ugh!!” Courtney screeched, then cried, “You know what? We don’t have to make the video at all.” She turned around and tried to run off before Adore stopped her.

“Okay, okay, fine. I’ll be Scary because she has the coolest hair and you can be Ginger,” Adore huffed out in annoyance.

“Yay!” Courtney cheered, wrapping her arms around Adore, planting a wet kiss on her cheek, “You can be Ginger next time, okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah…” Adore said, knowing full well that Courtney was lying and that she’d pull the same shenanigans next time, if there ever even was a next time.

“So, that means April’s Posh, Adore is Scary, I’m Ginger, Dela you can be Sporty and Darienne can be Baby,” Courtney turned to the other girls. Darienne frowned, not really on board with the casting.

“Courtney, are you sure you don’t want to be Baby. I mean you’re blonde and cute and would make the perfect Baby,” she tried to convince her one last time.

Courtney frowned, “Do you want to be Sporty?” the tremor in her voice and the look on her face told Darienne that they would be in for another tantrum if she kept arguing, and she didn’t think she could deal with it.

“Fine, I’ll be Baby,” Darienne sighed.

-

“I’m never gonna forgive you for dredging up that Spice Girls video…” Adore grumbled.

Courtney laughed half-heartedly, shrugging. “Sorry boo, it’s my favorite.”

“I loooooved it!” Dela cried happily. “I think we should do it again, like a reunion tour. There's totally room on the dance floor.”

“Uh, how about no fucking way?” Adore retorted, a look of horror on her face. She looked to the others for support, but Courtney was distracted by her phone.

COURTNEY: Where are you? It’s almost 9…

Darienne looked at Adore and cleared her throat. “You know what I think we need? Presents.”

Adore nodded. “Yes!” she exclaimed as Courtney’s eyes lit up happily.

“Great idea!” Roy jumped up to help Darienne grab the gifts and Adore mouthed ‘THANK YOU’ at both of them. Roy smiled and gave her a wink.

-

Courtney sat in a decorated chair, ankles crossed demurely like the princess she was, everyone gathered around her wanting their present to be opened first.

“I’m only going to open a few presents for now,” Courtney announced knowing that she wouldn’t make it through everyone’s presents quick enough. “So, who wants to go first,” she sang, closing her eyes and holding her hands out, making grabbing motions.

Her dad’s parents, Grammy and Papa were the first to pass Courtney her gift, which consisted of a card and birthday money.

“Thank you, so much,” she squealed at the hundred dollars, giving both her grandparents a kiss.

Darienne decided to be the brave soul to go next. “Here you go, Courtney.”

“I wonder what it is,” Courtney shook the wrapped present causing everyone to laugh. She tore the paper off to reveal a beautifully carved frame, painted pink and white. The picture in the frame was taken at Courtney’s 13th birthday party. Courtney started to tear up at the memories that the picture brought.

Courtney stood in the center of the picture, brows furrowed cutely, with icing on her nose, a laughing Adore beside her. Roy was trying to stop Bob from digging his fingers into his slice of cake. Darienne was the only one posed for the camera with her hands on her hips and a smile on her face while April, Dela, Thorgy and Jamin were captured in the background, oblivious to the picture being taken.

“Thank you, Dari!” Courtney sniffed, pulling Darienne into a tight hug.

“You’re welcome, sweetie,” Darienne squeezed her back, “I made it the frame and painted it myself.”

Courtney grabbed the picture frame and stared at it for another moment before sitting it aside carefully, “Thank you so much.”

After Courtney sat back in her chair, Roy stepped forward with his present. “Here you go, princess.”

Courtney took the big bag from him, dramatically weighing it to see how heavy it was. Pulling out and tossing the pink tissue paper behind her, Courtney pulled out the card first. Ripping it opened, her mouth dropped at the season passes to Six Flags Magic Mountain.

“Oh my gosh! Thank you, babe,” she pulled him down her a quick kiss on the cheek, “This summer is going to be sooo fun,” she shimmied her shoulders excitedly at the thought of going to the amusement park all summer, especially since the new rides were supposed to be amazingly death-defying.

“Told you,” Adore cracked. “Whore for danger.”

“Yeah, I’m counting on it,” Roy joked quietly, and Adore made a face at him.

Courtney laughed, setting the envelope to the side, her face lighting up when she dug into the bag pulling out what looked to be lotion and bubble bath.

“Oooh,” she bounced in her seat as she unscrewed the top on the lotion to get a good whiff, “My favorite. You remembered.” She looked up at him with adoring eyes.

“Of course. Keep digging,” Roy urged.

Courtney set the lotion and bubble bath aside, reaching into the bag and pulling out a rolled-up t-shirt. She shot Roy a skeptical look before opening the shirt to get a good look at it.

“A Destiny’s Child shirt,” Courtney turned it around, holding it up for everyone else to see.

“Yes, because you’ll need it for the concert-”

“CONCERT!?” Courtney screamed, scooting to the edge of her seat looking at Roy with huge eyes.

“Yep, my cousin Monica is a dancer on the tour and she hooked us up with some dope seats when they come here in September--” Roy said.

“Ahhh!” she screeched, hopping up out of her seat to show her mom, sister and grandparents what her boyfriend had gotten her (even though they saw the whole thing) and they smiled and gasped in excitement for Courtney. Roy slid into Courtney’s seat, glancing around the room, momentarily catching Adore’s eye and smirking. She smiled back sweetly, letting him have his little moment of glory.

“Omigod, thank you!” Courtney leaped into Roy’s lap, covering his face with kisses.

“You’re really happy? I figured like, jewelry or something...you know, it would be kind of predictable. But this is something we can do together.”

She pressed their foreheads together. “You’re the best boyfriend ever, and we’re going to have the most amazing summer.” Courtney wrapped her arms around Roy’s neck, whispering, “I love you so much…”

“I love you more. Even though you’ve been a real pain in the ass…”

“Hey!” Courtney exclaimed, pulling away, but Roy pulled her back, capturing her lips in a sweet, tender kiss, hands circling her waist.

Dela looked at Adore. “Are they always like this?” she asked quietly, wrinkling her nose.

Adore stuck her tongue out, nodding. “Always. Gross, huh?”

Dela nodded, then poked Courtney on the shoulder. “Hey, birthday princess…” she sang.

“Yeahhh?” Courtney lifted her head, leaning against Roy’s shoulder, slightly glassy-eyed.

“Want another present?”

“Yes!”

Dela handed her a shiny turquoise bag.

“Wait, you really got me a present?! But you came all the way here, you didn’t need to also buy me something!”

“Awww, I love you, and you’re so full of shit!” Dela laughed.

Courtney giggled.

She opened the turquoise bag and found it stuffed to the brim with glittery nail polishes, lip glosses, and a pair of super chic retro sunglasses, which she immediately tried on, pursing her lips in a model-esque pose.

“Gorgeous! See, I knew they were you!” Dela exclaimed.

“Aw, thank you Dela,” Courtney pulled her into a hug, “I've missed you so much.”

Courtney was about to get up, when Adore asked, “Time for one more?”

“I think we can manage that,” Courtney grinned.

“Here you go.” Adore handed Courtney a long, narrow box, wrapped in black glittery paper. The tag said “2005.” “I hope it satisfies your demands.”

Courtney giggled, remembering how she’d made Adore promise that her present would make everyone jealous. She unwrapped the box, opening the velvet lid slowly. Inside was a rose gold charm bracelet.

The first charm Courtney saw was a tiny little bow. She bit her lip, holding back tears, studying at all the other charms. There were some sweet ones that represented them and their friendship, like music notes and drama masks and a little heart, and then a bunch like the bow that seemed to go with the presents she’d gotten over the last two weeks...a tree, a roller coaster, tiny little crutches, a lollipop, a microphone, a hairbrush, a ladder, the British flag.

She laughed at the skull and crossbones, then touched the one beside it, looking up at Adore’s expectant face. “What’s this one?”

“The eternity symbol. Best friends forever.” Adore’s voice was soft.

Courtney lunged forward, wrapping her into a hug, tears dripping down her face, sobbing into her neck.

“So you like it?” Adore whispered teasingly into her hair, holding back tears of her own, trying to keep things light.

“It’s perfect.” Courtney pulled away, tears still falling. “Can you help me put it on?” she asked.

“It doesn’t match your other jewelry--”

“I don’t care,” Courtney sniffled, wiping her eyes with a gloved hand.

“Okay, then.” Adore took her wrist and fastened the bracelet.

Courtney hugged her again, clinging to her tightly.

“Come on, let’s finish dinner so we can dig into that ridiculous pink cake over there,” Adore murmured.

She slung an arm around Courtney’s waist and led her back to their table, glancing at Roy on the way, who had his eyes narrowed at her. She shrugged and grinned at him, feeling a little petty, but knowing her victory was bittersweet. She may have won this round, but he was still the boyfriend.

-

DAD: Hiya kiddo. Hope you’re having a blast. I hate to be a bummer but I’m not gonna make it tonight. I’m sure you’d rather spend the night with your friends anyway. Have a fantastic birthday, I love you loads, and I promise that Katya and I will take you out to dinner real soon to celebrate.

Courtney snapped her phone closed and put it down on the table, straightening out her skirt.

Roy put his hands on her shoulder. “Did he say when he’s--”

“He’s not coming,” Courtney said flatly, clearing her throat.

Adore swallowed, trying to think of something to say that would make her feel better, and coming up dreadfully short. She looked up into Courtney’s eyes, could see how crushed her best friend was, and knew that nothing she could do would fix it.

Courtney looked away from Adore’s sympathetic expression, those hazel eyes so full of concern that they’d make her burst into tears if she looked at them a second longer, took a deep breath and turned towards the dance floor, sighing. “Why are those lights out?”

“What lights?” Roy asked.

“Those!” Courtney pointed to a string of fairy lights that were out, near the dance floor.

“They probably came unplugged. I’ll go check.”

Courtney followed him over to the dance floor, looking around, tapping her foot. “Nobody is dancing. Tomas, can’t you play something more fun? Where’s the playlist I gave you?” She crossed her arms.

“Yeah, sure. I was just trying to keep it kind of chill while people finished dinner. We can kick things up.” The DJ winked at her and opened his laptop.

Darienne walked up and asked, “Hey, babe, do you still want to try and save some of the enchiladas, ‘cause they’re almost gone…”

“WHAT?! We were supposed to save a whole tray in the kitchen to bring to the shelter tomorrow! Who put it out?!” Courtney demanded.

“I don’t know, I’m sure it was an innocent--oh, no...”

“What?”

“It looks like you’re missing an earring,” Darienne said, touching her cheek softly.

“What?!” Courtney cried, panicking.

“Yeah, hold still, it’s probably just somewhere on your dress. Dela, come here, help me for a sec.”

Courtney stood, wringing her hands, as the two girls searched the folds of her skirt. “I can’t lose that earring, I borrowed it from my mom, it belonged to my great-grandmother, oh god, you have to find it, please hurry.” She began to whimper, covering her face, as Grandma Muriel approached.

“Why do you look so distressed, dear?”

“Grandma, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry!” she wailed, grasping the older woman’s hands. “I think I lost Nana’s earring, it must be around here somewhere but I don’t know if we can find it and--”

“Courtney, for heaven’s sake, get ahold of yourself.” Muriel shook her head, walking away.

“Just stop, it’s no use…” Courtney shook Dela off her skirt. “It’s too dark. We’ll never find it.”

“But maybe we can--”

“I said leave it!”

“Okay, sorry.” Dela exchanged a look with Darienne and backed off. “I’m gonna go get some more punch…”

“Uh, Court, I think one of the bulbs in that string burned out, they aren’t working,” Roy said.

“Ugh! Great!”

Suddenly, the cheerleaders stormed the dance floor as Missy Elliott’s “I’m Really Hot” began blasting.

Courtney nodded at Tomas, who winked, and then was pulled into a group of squealing girls by Laganja. That’s when she noticed the red flower on Alyssa’s dress. “Really, Alyssa? You of all people can’t follow a dress code?”

“Step off, Jenek.”

“Excuse me?”

“I’m one of the few people here who doesn’t find your diva nonsense charming. I’m not the one. So step. Off. If you know what’s good for you.”

Some of the cheerleaders paused, taking notice of the two girls standing in the middle of the dance floor.

Bob's hand tightened around April’s as he tried to subtly nod in Alyssa and Courtney's direction.

“Five bucks on Alyssa,” he whispered, causing April to snort.

“You're terrible. Alyssa won't do anything but make her run extra laps at cheer practice or something. She's all talk,” April murmured, eyes watching the two girls.

“I don't know, Alyssa has about 20 pounds on Courtney. She could definitely take her.” Bob shrugged his shoulders, pulling April closer as he waited to see what would happen, April’s cheeks reddening.

After staring each other down, Courtney turned on her heel and flounced away, nearly bumping into her mother.

“Hey, love, did you want to do the cake now, or wait a little?” Karen said. “I think people are mostly done with dinner, so--”

“I don’t care!” Courtney snapped. “Whatever.”

“Well, it’s your party, Courtney, so I think you should--”

“Fine! Do it now! It’s not like it fucking matters, mom, it’s just a stupid cake!” Tears burned in her eyes.

Karen looked at her like she was debating whether to smack her across the face or give her a hug. After a few moments, she spoke in a quiet voice. “I’ll go get the candles.”

“Great.” Courtney bit her lip, holding back tears.

Roy took a step towards her. “Courtney, everyone is doing their best, okay? I mean, I know you’re upset about your dad, but that’s no reason to act like a bitch to everyone who’s here, who’s trying to--.”

Courtney narrowed her eyes at him, pushing him away. “This is not about my fucking dad, Roy!”

He rolled his eyes. “Okay, babe, whatever you say.”

“Go fuck yourself!” Courtney screeched, shoving him out of the way and storming off the dance floor.

Roy stood for a moment, helpless, knowing he’d done the wrong thing, as “1, 2 Step” began blaring over the speakers, the bass pumping, the dance floor filling up even more, suddenly feeling stifling.

“Good work, bro,” Adore said, thumping him on the shoulder.

“Fuck. I don’t know where she went…” He shook his head.

“I know where she went,” Adore assured him. “Maybe let’s not light any candles yet, though?”

Roy nodded.

-

Adore climbed the ladder, hoisting herself into the tree house and sitting cross-legged on the floor. “Hey.”

Courtney wiped some tears from her cheeks.

“Hi.” She was curled in the corner, in a beanbag chair. Her tiara was askew and her gown was wrinkled, the tulle bunched up around her like a glittery fuchsia cloud.

“Planning to hide in here for the rest of the night?”

Sniffling, Courtney shrugged. “Maybe.”

“Alright.” Adore shoved the second beanbag chair over to her and stretched out. “In that case, I’m sort of bummed I didn’t bring any snacks, but I guess we’ll live.”

Courtney giggled a little in spite of herself, then sniffled as her tears continued to fall.

“I know I’m being awful. Roy was right.”

“Yeah, well, Roy’s always right, isn’t he? That doesn’t mean he needed to say it.”

Courtney closed her eyes.

“I hate that I care this much. I feel like such a stupid fucking baby. But...it’s my first birthday without him, you know?”

Adore nodded, silently taking her hand.

“I just really thought he’d come. I really thought, even though things have been weird and everything, that when it came down to it, I’d still be able to count on him. That he still gave half a shit. I’m so dumb.” She shook her head, tears pouring down her cheeks.

Adore brushed the tears away gently with her fingers, whispering. “You’re not dumb.”

Courtney leaned on Adore’s shoulder. “I even had a song picked out for us to dance to.”

“What song?”

“You Are My Sunshine.”

“Dude. That is so cheesy.”

“I know! That’s the point!” Courtney laughed, fresh tears falling.

“Well...it’s his loss, because you are sunshine. And you’ve never looked prettier.”

Courtney smiled, knowing that she was, at the moment, a tear-stained mess. “Thank you for lying.”

Adore took the edge of a blanket and dried Courtney’s cheeks, then opened her handbag and pulled out a compact, eyeliner, and lip gloss. She got to work fixing Courtney’s makeup and within two minutes, leaned back, pleased with her work. “There,” Adore said, adjusting the tiara on her head, rearranging her blonde curls. “Beautiful.”

“You are, too,” Courtney said softly, gazing up at her.

Adore looked at Courtney and, for a moment, it was if she could really see her. Every insecurity, every desire. She took Courtney’s face in her hands and tilted her chin up. She leaned in slowly and brushed their lips together.

Courtney’s heart raced as she savored the sweet softness of Adore’s mouth. She gripped the tulle fabric of her skirt in her hands, and then before she could blink, the kiss was over and Adore was pulling away again, still looking at her but not in the same way. The walls were back up and it felt as if a chasm had opened up between them.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have--” Adore’s voice was hoarse and distant.

“No, it’s alr--”

“We should go back.”

“Okay.” Courtney felt like crying again, and she wasn’t sure why. She just followed Adore, out of the tree house and back to the party.

-

The good news was, the DJ had managed to keep the party going. It seemed like most people hadn’t even noticed that Courtney left, from how much fun they were having on the dance floor. Except Roy, of course, sitting at their table, sipping forlornly out of a pink sparkly cup.

She approached him, nervously biting her lip, adjusting her elbow-length gloves. “Hey.”

He looked up. “Hi.”

“I’m sorry. I know I’ve been a monster all day, and you’ve been really great, like you always are, just the best, and, and you were right, I was upset about my dad, and I’m just...I’m sorry.” Courtney pressed her lips together, trying to hold in her tears. “Please don’t be mad.”

Roy stood up and wrapped his arms around her.

“I’m sorry too. I didn’t mean to upset you. But like, this is a birthday party and you’ve been so stressed and irritated, and I just thought--”

“I know, I know.”

“This is probably a totally insane idea, but what if we...keep an open mind here, this is crazy, but...what if we try to have fun for the rest of the night?” He raised his eyebrows suggestively. “Huh...huh?”

Courtney laughed, pulling him in for another hug. “You’re so lame. I love you.”

“Me too, baby.”

“Do you wanna dance?”

Roy put his hand over his heart. “I would love to, but I don’t know that Spice Girls choreography.”

Courtney giggled and pulled him onto the dance floor. “Don’t taunt me, Del Rio, or I’ll make you learn. Dela’s leaving again Monday, and I think you’d be a really cute Sporty.”

“She is the butch one.”

“Good point. Maybe you should be Posh.”

Roy laughed and put his arms around her as the DJ switched to Usher and Alicia Keys singing “My Boo.” Courtney leaned her head on his shoulder, and sighed, glancing around the dance floor. She caught Adore’s eye and smiled at her. Adore raised a pink sparkly cup at her, holding her gaze for a long moment until Willam thumped her on the shoulder to get her attention back.

Courtney looked back at Roy, who flashed his dimples at her and kissed her softly. She felt a stab of guilt, remembering the other kiss she’d gotten that night. But, it didn’t mean anything, right? It was just a friendly kiss, her best friend trying to make her feel better.

She closed her eyes, insides twisting, stomach in knots. Because if she was really honest with herself, it wasn’t the kiss that she felt guilty about. It was that feeling, the moment Adore pulled away, of regret. She dug her fingers into Roy’s shoulders, and he held her tighter around the waist.

Suddenly, she couldn’t stop the tears and she was crying again. Roy cupped her face and kissed her cheeks. “What’s the matter, babe?”

Courtney shook her head.

“One of those ‘it’s my party, I’ll cry if I want to’ moments? Should I just leave it alone?” Roy asked.

Courtney nodded as Roy swiped a napkin from the dessert table and dried her eyes.

“Alright. Come here.” He pulled her close and she fell into his arms, unable to tear her eyes away from where Adore stood with Willam and Pearl, deep in thought.

Adore stirred her punch with a straw as she half-listened to whatever Willam was running his mouth about. She couldn’t believe that she had kissed Courtney, especially in the emotional state that the blonde had been in, but in that moment it had felt so right and that’s what made it all the more wrong.

Adore was a slave to her feelings, and it felt like the more she tried to run from them, the more intense and reckless they became when they caught up to her.

That’s the moment when the lights suddenly cut out and Karen wheeled in the giant birthday cake, decorated with a huge fuchsia bow, black and white stripes, and shiny silver stars. Everyone gathered around the birthday girl to sing, and Adore focused on the sparkler candles, glittering in the darkness.

Goosebumps rose on the back of her neck, the feeling of someone’s eyes on her pulling Adore from her thoughts.

Hazel eyes looked up to find bright green eyes staring back at her. Adore grew anxious, unable to interrupt the emotions behind Courtney’s piercing stare.

Adore wondered if she had fucked up and Courtney was mad at her or even worse, if Courtney knew Adore had feelings for her that she shouldn’t have.

Adore looked away, her chest growing tight as a million thoughts ran through her head.

Courtney continued to gaze at her best friend, unable to focus on the crowd, on her mother and everyone urging her to blow out the candles.

“Babe, make a wish…” Roy said, kissing her temple.

Courtney bit her lip, eyes falling closed as she blew out the candles, not daring to let herself form a coherent thought in that moment. Because if she did, she was afraid of what she might wish for. She opened her eyes back up, and everyone was cheering, while Kimmy began to slice up the cake.

Roy swept her up into his arms again while the lights turned back on and Tomas turned up the music, Beyoncé‘s “Baby Boy.”

Pearl handed a piece of cake to Adore, taking one for herself too. “Dude, let’s go ask the DJ to play ‘American Life.’”

“That song where Madonna raps about her household staff?” Willam asked skeptically.

“Yeah! It’s so good!”

“That’s fucking embarrassing, New Girl.”

“Adore, come on, back me up here! I mean, or ‘Hollywood’ is good too…” she mused.

“I think I’m gonna take off,” Adore murmured, setting her cup down and pulling her phone out of her back pocket, sending a text to Raja asking if she could get a ride so that they could hang out.

-

As the song finished, Courtney lifted her head from Roy’s shoulder, smiling at him. “Thank you,” she said, reaching up and touching his cheek with her gloved hand.

“Anytime,” he replied, flashing those killer dimples at her.

Courtney glanced over to where Adore had been standing, feeling an urge to clear the air, just to make sure everything was okay, but she was gone. She excused herself from Roy, leaving him with Darienne and Dela, and hurried over. To her dismay, Willam and Pearl both reported that they thought Adore had left, and so she tore through the backyard to Adore’s house, shouting her name, finding her leaning on the side of her garage.

Her pounding heart began to slow down as she caught her breath.

“Hi...sorry for yelling, I just…”

“No, it’s okay. Are you alright?” Adore asked.

“Yeah. Um…” Courtney licked her lips, adjusting her gloves awkwardly. “Willam said you left, and I just wanted to find you so I could...I wanted to say thank you. For...for the bracelet. And...everything.” Courtney took another step towards her, eyes soft and misty.

“You’re welcome. Happy birthday.” Adore’s own eyes still had the same inscrutable, slightly guarded expression they’d had earlier. But her smile was genuine.

Courtney wrapped her arms around Adore’s shoulders, burying her face into her friend’s neck and hugging her tightly.

“I love you, Dory.”

Adore closed her eyes, holding her close, trying not to be hyper-aware of the warm breath against her skin, the scent of her silky hair, the all too recent memory of the taste of her.

Her chest rose and fell rapidly. As if by some miracle, they were suddenly blinded by headlights as Raja’s car pulled into the driveway. Adore broke away from the hug, waving gratefully to her.

“Um, that’s my...I gotta go,” she told Courtney, who simply nodded. “Goodnight. The party was awesome. And I love you too!” She blew a kiss as she slipped into the car.

Raja tossed a cigarette out the window as she pulled out of the driveway.

“Hey.”

“Hi.”

“Glad you texted.”

“Me too. I had to get out of there.”

“Not into the quinceanera fantasy?” Raja laughed.

Adore shook her head. “Been a long day.”

“Stressful?”

Adore looked over to Raja, the streetlights illuminating her features.

“Yeah,” Adore said, voice only slightly above a whisper, eyes flickering to Raja’s lips.

Pulling up to the stop sign at the end of the street Raja put the car in park, turning to face Adore.

“Well, we all do it. Have a big princess-like party; if we don’t want it our mom’s ‘ll make us,” Raja said lowly, leaning on the armrest.

“Really?” Adore asked, leaning on towards Raja, “Did you?”

“Mhm,” Raja smirked, eyes flickering to Adore’s lips, “My ma made sure that I had an extraaaavagant birthday party. I had a big turquoise dress, my hair done up, the works.”

Adore let out a breathy giggle, “You don’t look the type.”

“No?” Raja raised her eyebrows, slightly tilting her head and Raja’s warm breath hitting Adore’s face made Adore notice that they were closer than she realized. Lips inches apart.

“No.”

“Maybe when we get to my place…” Raja placed a sweet kiss on Adore’s lips-- that had her chasing Raja’s lips as she pulled away, “I can show you some pictures.”

Raja smiled innocently, but Adore wouldn’t let her get away. She needed to forget what happened earlier; she needed to forget her mistake, the way nothing seemed to matter, but them in the tree house. Adore leaned over the armrest, pulling Raja back towards her, pressing her lips into Raja’s harder than the first kiss, desperate to erase the way Courtney’s lips felt against hers. Raja could do that, Raja could make her forget and when the older girl nipped at her lip, Adore let her in.

The position was awkward with the armrest pressed between them, but the feel of Raja’s hands on her, tugging her closer was worth it. Adore gripped at Raja’s jacket, when they broke for air, Raja leaving kisses along Adore’s jaw before Adore guided Raja’s lips back to hers.

Before the kiss could deepen again the girls were scared apart by a horn beeping behind them. They looked up, both startled, as a car sped around them, the driver tossing them the finger.

“Damn, bro, calm down,” Raja said, and Adore giggled, arms sliding back around her neck.

“Come back here…”

[meggannn]

the itsv commentary is so full of great facts and bts info so i wanted to write down all my favorite parts, but i just ended up writing down anything that was interesting, which was honestly most of it. four thousand words later i ended up with their commentary on practically half the movie. i’ve put the interesting or funny bits that i jotted down behind a cut if anyone is interested.

this commentary audio had Phil Lord (co-writer, producer), Chris Miller (producer), Bob Persichetti (co-director), Peter Ramsay (co-director), Rodney Rothman (co-director, co-writer), but it was kind of difficult to tell who was talking most of the time, so i didn’t include names on who said what, unless I knew for certain who was talking.

The first Miles sticker in the film is a “glitch” flashing on the Sony Pictures Animation logo. “Already putting his stamp on the movie.”

RIPeter is meant to be an amalgamation of all the Spider-Man we know, “good and bad” (as the dance happens, someone corrects him:) “Good and GREAT.”

(“I’ve got an excellent theme song, and a... so-so popsicle.”)

“That joke saved the movie.” “The dance move or the popsicle?” “The dance move. I resisted that dance joke and Rodney pushed hard for it (…) It told the audience what movie they were watching.”

“It was Rodney who was really pushing for him to be in this relatable idea of [Miles] not knowing the lyrics to this song but singing along.” “We started animating before the song was finished. It was really easy to not know the words then.”

“There are three very long shots that introduce Miles.” (The shot at home, the shot of him walking past Brooklyn Middle, the shot of him entering Visions.) “That was a deliberate choice, to open with a big crazy Spider-Man montage, and then with Miles, start a different pace, long shots, and just watch him and how he is, and don’t get too fancy with it. Although ironically these shots are really fancy.” The shot of him walking past Brooklyn Middle and the one of him walking into Visions are meant to directly contradict each other: his comfort zone vs him out of place in new surroundings. (Megan’s note: My take is that with these shots they might have been trying to represent his home, his past, and his future.)

“Everything [in this scene from color to sound] is meant to go from a very heightened experience with Peter to a very naturalistic experience with Miles.”

For the scene in the car, Shameik and Brian sat in chairs to set up in a car, with microphones and a rearview mirror. “Brian might have even been a little annoyed at Shameik a couple of times, and I think you can feel it in here, in a really wonderful way.”

(Talking about the chromatic aberration) “Sometimes it looks like you’re watching a 3D movie without the glasses on.” “That was on purpose.” “Every frame is supposed to feel like a piece of printed art.”

“On the cover of Great Expectations, there’s an image of Magwitch grabbing Pip’s shoulder in a cemetery.” “Foreshadowing!”

A side character named “Smiley Kid” is in several shots of miscellaneous Visions students. “Because he’s not a real person, I think we can say he is our least favorite person.” “I think he comes around. He’s great, then he’s bad, then he’s great again.” “He’s like the extra in every live action who worms his way to the front of every shot.” “He just almost always looks in the camera.”

Miles’s expression when the teacher calls him out at trying to fail was “completely ripped off of President Barack Obama.”

Benson Avenue was meant to call back to where one of their fathers grew up in Bensonhurst, Brooklyn.

(“Hypnotize” by Notorious BIG playing on Aaron’s stereo) “Biggie Smalls in an animated Spider-Man movie. In what universe?” “This is the ideal timeline that we’re living in.”

(This comment is said as Miles presses his face on the glass:) “That changed people’s perceptions of the movie. When we had this in, it really lit people up.” (To be honest, I can’t tell if this comment was made in response to Biggie Smalls, or to Miles pressing his face on the glass.)

They all loved Mahershala Ali. “The shoulder touch would work if your voice sounded like Mahershala’s.” Everyone was in awe every time they recorded with him. “He makes you want to be a better person when you’re around him.” “He’s got a high bar.” “Then he goes away and it kinda wears off.”

The subway Aaron brings Miles to was a place he and Jeff used to paint in when they were young, which adds another layer to him talking about/missing Jeff when he mentions it to Miles. The age difference probably means Aaron was younger than Jeff, and now he’s the older one with Miles here.

There’s a bigger history between Jeff and Aaron that’s only hinted at, and part of it is the reason why Miles has his mother’s last name, not his father’s. It’s implied Jeff was worried his bad history would follow Miles if he took his last name. Also because “then he would be named Miles Davis.”

They were excited to depict a spider-man experiencing spider-sense for the first time.

“We did the most expensive thing. In all choices.”

“People ask, How does Miles with a cop and nurse parents afford Jordans? And the answer is, they were a gift from his uncle.”

(On Kingpin’s animation possibilities.) “We always had this idea that he was the living expression of a black hole. The right for him is this floating head on a body that we could scale up and down depending on the shot with hands at the end of arms.” “While creating a black hole, he is a black hole.”

Someone felt very passionate about including the dimensional map showing the other universes the collider was connecting with. “It felt so important to me.”

(Paraphrasing this one) “Once Phil and Lord gave the MO to push convention, the gauntlet had been thrown, we started getting crazy stuff back. And a lot of the time our art direction would just be like, ‘Yeah! COOL!' ‘Do more of that!’”

(Peter rolls his eyes as the Prowler menacingly steps forward) “I like that [RIPeter] is exhausted at the idea of being killed.”

“The Prowler chase sequence was the first sequence that went through the whole pipeline.” (This and the cemetery scene were the first.)

(The burst card of Miles jumping over the subway tracks) Bob Persichetti: “I had such high hopes to do a lot of burst cards, I think that’s the only one I actually did.”

(as Rio comforts Miles in Spanish) “We never translated on screen (…) The idea being, this is the fabric of Miles’s life.” “This was inspired obviously by Brian Michael Bendis” (co-creator of Miles Morales and his longtime writer) “and Miles’ bicultural background. But also Phil Lord grew up in a bilingual house.” “And I took Spanish in high school.”

(Stan Lee cameo) “[Stan is] the only performer in the movie who we went to. Everyone else came into recording studios, but Stan Lee, we dispatched the microphone to him.” “Everybody wanted to animate Stan.” “If you hit pause any time a train goes by, because everyone wanted to animate Stan, he’s in almost every single train.” “He’s an extra in a lot.”

(Miles reading comics before jumping off the building) “If you notice in that comic book, it’s True Life Tales of Spider-Man, and to keep his cover, his name is not Peter Parker. In the comic book, his name is Billy Barker.” “Great.” “Who could ever figure that out, right?”

A bunch of drawings around the grave of Peter Parker’s tombstone were all done by different kids of people on the show.

They mention the cemetery scenes was one of the first ones finalized. When they were still trying to figure out how to bring Miles to life, “you can see that his performance evolved from this [cemetery] scene.” “It’s super expressive.”

There was lots of debate on how much paunch should be on Peter B’s stomach. There are something like 3-5 different body models used throughout the movie.

They all loved the scenes of Peter B in his apartment: the cut to him crying in the shower, to pinned to the bed with his butt out, to his pose on the futon flipping through channels. Someone really liked “[his] little quivering [spidey] eyes on the seahorse shot.”

The comic book page-flipping device was a “late breaking” realization of how to transition between flashbacks and present day.

Chris Miller did the voice of the cop dispatcher on the radio saying the “Child dressed like Spider-Man dragging a homeless corpse behind a train” line. “The role I was born to play.”

In the walk-and-talk scene in the alley, they felt inspired to take a lot of crazy shots. “We were passionate that a Spider-Man movie needed to be shot from their point of view, where every surface can be the ground.”

“Because of questions on the internet, we took of one of Miles’s shoes. Just in case anybody wanted to know why he was sticking.” “Another thing that I was passionate about but nobody cared about but me.”

“One of the big tricks of this sequence and of this relationship was to let you believe that Peter was a good guy even though he was being a real… turkey… to Miles.” (Peter saying “No, does it look like it’s working? No! No, it’s not…”) “This was one of the few moments that we added kind of late just to know that he was a sweet pea underneath it all.” “Finding the right level for his not caring about Miles, and then learning to care about Miles, finding the right level from the beginning all the way through to the end, was something that took a lot of nuance.”

The interrogation/alley and burger scenes probably went through the most amount of reworks and rewriting than any others, because there was so much exposition and “you got tired” watching two heavy information scenes in a row. And given how often they said “this scene went through so many iterations” in this commentary, these two scenes must have been a LOT of rewrites. (Some of the alternate burger scenes can be seen in the film’s trailers and alternate universe cut.)

“I still kind of miss the unfinished version of this shot, where his feet… He had no toes for a really long time for some reason.” “You had to say like fifty times, ‘We’re gonna add toes right?’” “‘We’re gonna get his toes on there, right?’”

“One of the things about Kingpin is that he just magically appears outside of the car. Because there’s no way he could get actually get through the doorway.” “Maybe in the future where you guys are watching this ten years from now, someone will have figured out how to animate that. But in 2018 it’s still impossible.”

(Miles finding Peter in the vents) “These moments were really when you started to feel the relationship between the two of them develop.” “I love that Miles has to fight to occupy the same space and become an equal to Peter.”

(Peter mockingly blah-blahing as Doc Ock explains the danger of the collider, then saying afterward “Oh nevermind, that is bad.”) “For the sake of a laugh, we undercut the stakes, and then immediately had to buy the stakes back.”

“We went through probably 70 different version of what Miles would look like while invisible … and I like how how he comes in and out of invisibility was stylized to some degree.”

They say the Doc Ock/Peter scene was “really really bad at one point” and now it’s “one of the most wonderful surprises.”

Ock’s computer is based off of Phil Lord’s actual desktop. Some files are cut off the edges of the screen because they just dragged things off of the internet.

(Peter glitching in the chair) “I’m remembering all of the conversations that determined that it was funniest if you left Peter’s head unglitched.”

It was Justin Thompson’s idea to use soft robotics for this version of Dock Ock’s tentacles.

Everyone, from animation to the sound team, saw Doc Ock’s tentacles about 3 months before completion, went (exasperated) “Oh THAT’S what they look like? We’ll have to redo X Y Z whole thing…”

You can tell they loved the monitor joke. “Very silly things happening around very cool things.”

The Bagel! text was added last minute. “That was a joke pitch by Justin that was taken seriously.”

“Everyone felt empowered to pitch crazy ideas, and that’s why it felt so rich and deep.”

“It’s no understatement to say that this look in the forest is one of the hardest things in a movie like this. To make something look realistic is something we know how to do pretty well. But to make it look graphic and illustrative is almost impossible.” “Especially when you’re close and far to trees within the same shot at times.” “We had so many conversations with Danny, our V Effects supervisor, like, ‘But, you guys, we’re going to be in a forest, you really don’t want the leaves to rustle in the wind?' ‘No, we’ll be okay!’” (Later, when Peter and Miles swing off together, the leaves rustle:) “See, the leaves can move, guys!” “We just CHOSE for them not to.” “It was an absolute creative choice.”

“This is another moment in the story when we really open this beat up to let Peter and Miles have a victory together and cement their bond, that you really were rooting for their relationship. We breezed through this quickly and you didn’t have the same connection with the two of them.” “One of the things in the screenplay that we discovered really late is that you needed to have a lot of smaller, positive accomplishments throughout the center of the movie to have it work right.” “(…) This middle section of the movie is about Peter and Miles learning to fall for each other, basically.”

(During Gwen’s intro) “We give just enough to hopefully tease you guys into being really into each one of these characters’ origin story.”

“One week of days and nights just passed in that one shot.” “She hit a time anomaly on her way to this dimension.”

“She vibes with Miles after he had been bitten by the spider, and she purposefully bumped into him there, in case you didn’t catch that.”

“We were trying to make Ock such an intelligent and socially awkward person that then turns into this really formidable equal to Kingpin.”

(When Peter thwips May’s doorbell and then exhales with his hands on his hips.) “One of my favorite poses in the movie.” “That pose gets a laugh all by itself.”

“‘You look tired’ is a thing my mom says to me every time I see her.” “It’s accurate.”

“I fought hard to have (May) kick that door open.” “I tried to cut that and then you uncut it, correctly.” “Let’s be honest, she’s not treating her house very well.”

(In the Spidey Lair) “Lots of Easter eggs here.” “We should’ve put an actual Easter egg in this shot.”

They debated for a long time putting the B-team spiders in the picture at all, knowing it would be more work, wanting to make their characters worth being in the picture without taking away from Miles. “Nothing worked in the movie until it had something to do with Miles and his story.”

(On the spider team testing Miles:) This angle was “late-breaking, on the backside”: “This made it feel like they all cared about Miles, even though they maybe didn’t believe in him.” “Just Peter going ‘Cool it.’ For the longest time we didn’t have something like that.”

(Pretty sure this is Peter Ramsay) “When you’re making a movie it’s like you’re building an emotion machine. You’ve gotta have all the parts calibrated the right way, make sure it’s properly oiled, cause if it isn’t, the gears are gonna stick, and you’re not gonna feel right.”

The Prowler Sound™ is not a jaguar or cat, but an elephant. “We only did the dark scenes first cause they were easier to light.” (Some of those scenes they mention are Miles running from the Prowler, the cemetery scene, Miles writing the note in Aaron’s apartment.)

They tried about a million songs for Peni while she makes a new goober. (The song used is not in the soundtrack, but it’s “Want It Here” by Xenia Pax.)

(On Peni’s Heelies) “This shot’s not long enough to get her from the kitchen to the couch.” “Is that why?!” “That’s one hundred percent why. Just put those little wheelies on here!”

In the first draft, there was an idea there RIPeter was a grad student under tutelage of male Doc Ock so that’s how Liv and Ock knew each other.

“The table pushing into Miles. That was something my older brother, when we would fight when we were kids, he would do that to me.”

(When Aaron closes his eyes, refusing to kill Miles:) “That little look. ‘Cause he knows what’s coming.”

(They’re all quiet as Miles carries Aaron to safety, caught up in the scene.) “We’re all kind of gripped.” “We’re supposed to be giving interesting anecdotes here, guys, come on.” “It was so cold that day…”

Prowler’s death was the first session they did with Mahershala. “He’s a method actor, and his death scene, it was like he was really dying.”

“We gave animators the freedom. You can make Miles unattractive. He can ugly cry, because this is raw and it feels so emotional.”

(When Miles throws his sketchbook out the window, only for it to immediately come flying back in:) “It’s a one-shot transition from deep emotion and regret and pain. We said, ‘He’s gonna throw the one thing out that really represents his uncle, yet it’s gonna come flying back in.’ It was hard to make that shot work.” “It’s a great story statement that you can’t lose the things that make up your past.”

When everyone is talking about someone they’ve lost, an alternate line has Ham saying “I lost my uncle. He was electrocuted, and it smelled so good.” It got a lot of laughs, but the team says that from then on, the audience “resisted” Ham because he killed the mood, and it was hard for people to see him as anything other than a goofy cartoon, so they changed the line to “Miles, the hardest part about this job is you can’t always save everyone.” (Megan’s note: I think they probably didn’t bother to re-animate the others’ facial reactions after changing Ham’s line, because judging by the reactions from Peter and Miles in this shot it feels like Ham just said something annoying/out of place lol.)

When Peter says “It wasn’t their decision” (for Miles to stay behind), Miles has a very quick reaction shot where he turns away, bites his lip, and shakes his head. Someone mentions it’s one of their favorite shots of Miles.

(On the scene with Miles and his dad at the door) “When Brian Tyree Henry saw this scene [with a rough performance, just animation], he got the movie. It made such an impression on him. He was very happy to come in and pick any lines up for us and just keep working.” “We were working on the shots on layup for this. The idea of having them be on thirds to start, then coming closer, and finally ending with the final split-screen shot at the end.” “And Jefferson crosses the scene, which I think is really interesting. They start off on opposite sides of the screen. He makes the first move.” “It’s amazing to me to see Miles transformed by his father.” “It feels earned.”

“In an earlier version of that scene, Aunt May gave him a version of that speech, which was nice, but it needed to be Dad.”

(Later on, someone mentions:) “Tom was the first one to say ‘It shouldn’t be Aunt May at the door, it should be Dad.’ And we all sort of slapped our foreheads going ‘That’s absolutely right.’”

“After our premiere, my 9yo son [Luca? Luka?] asked me this. ‘So Papa, you know Miles spray-paints one of those suits and it becomes his suit. Super cool, Papa, but it shouldn’t fit him. It’s way bigger.’” (Laughter) “Did he have to wait a few hours for it to dry?” "We cut out the sequence where Aunt May sewed it tighter and altered it.” “And they had the hair-dryer express drying it. ‘Your friends are in danger.’ ‘Well just let me let it dry first!” “I tell you, spray paint, five minutes and you’re dry.” “She pre-altered it. She knew he was coming. She said, ‘It took you long enough.’ It all happened in advance.”

“The scene of Miles falling and everything slowing down and I always appreciated that Phil called out he was ‘falling and rising’ and the same time.” “It made the movie. A rare thing that goes from the stage directions all the way through production and onto the screen.”

“This sequence used to end with him getting hit by a truck. But really felt like it was time for Miles to get a big victory.” (Megan’s note: This scene is shown in draft stage in the alternate universe cut. Miles makes his leap, free-runs over some trucks and buildings, and his scene is interrupted when he gets hit by a truck and crashes to the ground. There’s a moment where he collects himself, the pushes himself to his feet and runs off into the city to join the others at the collider. I interpret this idea to be their showing how Miles fully embraces the “Get back up” lesson, since Miles’s pose in the sketches imitates the same one in the basement when the spiders are hazing him and he’s on the ground.) “And now people applaud.” “There’s a general attitude with this movie that was like, ‘How can we do things differently?’ That was a case of when we were like, ‘What if we didn’t have the audience feel really good in this moment?” (Laughter) “What if we had them feel really bad? Right at the moment they want to feel good, what if we made them feel terrible?” (Joking) “Let’s poke THEM in the eye.” “I think in early drafts, we just were like, Miles is losing and falling short the whole movie until the very end. And when we put that up, we realized that you needed to see him slowly winning and winning and winning until he won even bigger at the end.”

A set-up that never fully made it in the movie is that Fisk runs charities for Spider-Man and that’s why the dinner was set up like it was.

The bread scene was on the chopping block for a long time. “By adding this interaction, and making it about Peter and MJ and something real, all of a sudden this scene was worth it.” “It’s necessary to know what Peter’s giving up by sacrificing himself.” “It lasts just long enough because we learned that if you stay way from Miles too long--” (They interrupt here to point out two cameo people at dinner, “Danny and Josh,” who I couldn’t get a cap of) “--We lose our connection to the movie in a way. But at this point we care enough about Peter to want him to get back to MJ too.”

“The servers that were holding the movie were moving slow by the end of this shoot. And we had the best computers.” “At a certain point I think we overloaded Imageworks’ server. There was a moment they were afraid the movie was going to break their machine.” “Which was our whole idea. Our whole approach was, how do we break these pipes that make the movie?”

(During the final collider fight sequence, but they don’t specify what idea this was about specifically:) Chris Miller: “One of the only times I can ever remember saying ‘Okay you’ve gone too far.’ There was one brand where I was like, ‘I don’t get this.’ A few of the drawings that were somehow even more insane than this.” “What you’re saying, Chris, is that there’s a version of this scene that’s even crazier than this?” “Literally the only time I can remember going, ‘Okay guys, you’ve done it. You’ve broken it.’”

“I’m sure there’s are filmmakers watching this, so I think this is a learnable lesson from this sequence. Which is if you want to put something super crazy in your movie, wait until the very end when a lot of movie has been spent on your movie and your release date is 3 to 4 months away and they literally cannot stop you or else they have no movie.”

One of them points out Miles webs a turntable to propel himself upward. (Megan’s note: Miles also does this just as his own theme starts playing, which starts off with a record-scratch. I thought that was cool.)

(The moment when Gwen calls Miles “Spider-Man”:) “That choice went through a lot of iterations like “What’s the end of their relationship?” That she calls him Spider-Man instead of giving him a kiss on the cheek? It makes me well up just thinking about it.”

Kingpin breaks the glass of a building and the pieces fly toward Miles. Bob Persichetti calls these “Dorito chips.”

After the train enters a collider steam, there are versions of the interior of the train that flash from all five dimensions. There’s a futuristic Peni version, an old-timey Noir version, there’s a Gwen version… “As it passes through the beam, you get to see five versions of the train existing at once.”

(Vanessa and Richard seeing Kingpin) “This idea of repeating mistakes (for Kingpin). No matter what, he was gong to keep repeating these mistakes.” “He’s still who he is.”

“It was my dream to have Kingpin headbutt Miles and it finally came true.”

Each one of these character is in a black costume, and black surrounds them, and yet you can still see what’s happening.

“I remember people wanting to cut the shoulder-touch at the end.” “Who wanted to cut this?!” (Overlapping chatter) “No names in the screen.” “I remember feeling, oh my god. You’re LUCKY you got the shoulder touch in.” “The fact that you could pay off a set up that wasn’t even a set up…”

(On Miles seeing inside the universe as the collider explodes) “And then this. How long can it be? Let’s make it way too long!”

“The Anvil (that clanks at the end) was in Ham’s pocket?” “In the hammer space.”

(Miles hugs Jefferson) “This was the moment everybody went ‘Oh, YES.’ No matter what, we have to get to the hug, and the disguised voice, and the ‘I love you.’”

Someone describes the ending soundtrack as “Miles’ playlist meets Aaron’s playlist meets a superhero movie.”

They indirectly confirm Peter B and MJ do get back together. “Peter B gets his happy ending.” Another bit someone mentions was a late addition.

“I like that the movie starts and ends with Miles in his bedroom by himself.”

“We could do a whole other commentary saying completely different things.” “Probably four.” “We should do an alternate universe commentary.”

“You’re your own champion, I think that’s the idea. This is a story of empowerment. A champion is not coming from outside of you to come and save you. It’s your job.”

(As the credits roll) “Every name you see right now, we’ve seen them cry.” “We’ve made them cry.” “Every name you see right now has yelled at us.”

(On the post-credits scene) “We thought of this (post-credits scene) two months ago.” (They recorded this commentary in Dec 2018.) “We wanted to get Miguel in there and show the opportunities of where the multiverse could go.”

“I looked this up. This IS the most expensive dumb joke of all time.”

“We didn’t finish cleaning the cell on that close-up of Spider-Man.”

[grownups-are-the-real-monsters]

The Disco Strangler - The Kids Are Alright

Summary: Disco sucks.....right?

Another one shot in the ‘Kids Are Alright’ Series

Words:  1,690

{Derry, Maine. June 20th, 1976. 2:47 P.M. }

“I feel like we need to do something to celebrate Summer.” Stan grinned, dumping his years worth of work from Junior year into the trash bin just outside the school gates. 

“Sooo...’Gilligan’s Island’ re-run marathon at your place?” Mike asked, picking out the pencils and pens from his pile before pushing it over into the bin. 

“I don’t know...It is a special occasion....” Stan nodded, snapping his fingers with a smirk. “Maybe ‘The Brady Bunch’.”

Beverly sighed as she flipped through her yearbook, balanced atop of the trash. “Do we need to get out more?” She asked, turning to Bill. 

“God, yes.” He nodded, tossing in his papers in one by one as if they personally spited him. 

“Oh, we could go to the Hub?” Richie leaned over the trash and Mike almost felt tempted to push him in but resisted with a little laugh. 

“Nah, we go there all the time.” She shook her head. “What do you think Ben?” She turned to her right and Ben shrugged though he looked like he had an idea. “Oh c’mon, I can tell you have something.” She poked his arm. 

“Well, there is this Disco that opened a town over?” He tossed it out and immediately winced, waiting for the reaction. 

“Come on, are you c-c-crazy? I mean, a disco? No way.” Bill frowned as Beverly pursed her lips. 

“Yeah, Disco sucks.” Richie shook his head and looked to Beverly for help, knowing she sided with him on this. 

“I dunno. It could be fun? It’s better than the Hub again.” She shrugged and Richie looked offended. 

“-What could be fun?” Eddie asked as he walked from the gates, setting his stuff on the trash with the rest of them. Richie opened his mouth to explain but Beverly cut him off. 

“A Disco. It opened a town over. You in?” She asked. 

Eddie looked at Richie’s offended face and grinned. “Sure, pisses Richie off and it’s fun.” He flicked the Chemistry notes he’d copied from Richie into the trash. 

“I like Disco.” Stan shrugged and tossed his neat folder in. 

“How are you my best friend?” Richie scoffed and shook his head and Stan smirked at him. 

“I ask myself that same question everyday, Richie.” Stan nodded and Richie punched his arm, happy to have that cast off finally. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Beverly had invited Pattie over to her house before they left, to help her get ready. The girl had seemed rather nervous. 

Beverly tied a little ascot tie around her neck and pulled at her top, making sure she looked ok. And she looked over her shoulder at Pattie, smoothing her dress over with her hands. “You look real good, groovy even.” Beverly smiled and with a light laugh, so did Pattie. 

“There’s nothing to be nervous about, y’know?” Bev gave her a warm tap on the shoulder as she stood. 

“Yeah but...I can’t dance. And Stanley....” She paused to laugh. “Oh, just you wait to see him.” 

Beverly chuckled, now more than excited. “It’s easy, here-” Bev went over to her records and pulled one out, slipping it from its cover and readying it to play. “Don’t tell Richie but I have one disco album...” She grinned and laid the needle down. 

“My baby moves at midnight Goes right on till the dawn My woman takes me higher My woman keeps me warm-”

Pattie burst into fits of giggles. “The Bee Gees?” 

Beverly placed her hands on her hips and mocked offense. Pattie stood up straight again. 

“Oh, I love it.” She giggled and Beverly shook her hands. 

“Ok, so you wanna learn or not?” She gestured and Pattie nodded. 

“You should be dancing, yeah You should be dancing, yeah You should be dancing, yeah-”  

And that’s how Beverly ended up hosting a Pre-Disco party. Her and Pattie dancing around her room like idiots. Spinning each other around and mixing in a few actual dancing lessons that Bev knew off-hand. Beverly felt refreshed. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“This is too perfect. I mean, this is the greatest gift....Thank you.” Richie framed Stan with his hands in a mock camera position from afar. 

Stan took it in stride, bowing as Pattie bent down to pull on his patterned Bell-Bottoms with a grin. 

Beverly came to stand next to Ben with a grin, crossing her arms. “Ok, I’m ready to catch Disco Fever but-” She held out her finger “For one night only.” 

Ben chuckled. “If you think you can be cured that fast, that is.” He poked her arm and smirked, turning to get into the Vista Cruiser Eddie had parked in Stan’s driveway. 

But before anyone could get in, Stan’s parents came outside, Andrea had a camera around her neck. “Oh, mom no.” Stan held out his hand but his mother frowned. 

“Just a few. You kids are growing up so fast.” She held out the camera. Richie grinned, looking Stan’s outfit up and down again. 

“Picture time everyone!!!” Richie grinned at Stan’s parents, they grinned back. Mike shrugged and got ready to grin for the photos. Bill joined him.  

Everyone crowded in and Andrea was about to snap the picture before she counted them up with her finger. “One of you is missing....oh, Eddie!” 

Richie got out from under Beverly’s arm and ducked to look in the front seat of the car where Eddie sat. “Thought you could get away that easily, Eds?” He chuckled as he opened the door and Eddie reluctantly followed him. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“She was right...” Beverly trailed off, looking towards the dance floor. 

“Who?” Bill asked, pulling out a chair and sitting next to her. 

“Pattie....Look at Stan go....” 

Beverly and Bill slowly and simultaneously tilted their heads, mouths both forming small ‘o’s. 

“Wow they are really good.” Mike grinned. 

“Yeah, if you wanna dance that way.” Richie rolled his eyes, kicking his leg under their table. 

“I would love to dance that way.” Beverly smiled, looking on as Stan and Pattie moved. 

“You w-wanna dance?” Bill asked and Beverly impulsively. 

“Sure.” She grinned and stood and followed after Bill. 

Ben opened and closed his mouth as he tilted his head down at the table. Richie took notice and scooted closer. “Look man, remember what you said...” 

Ben nodded. “Yeah...Bev and I...we’re just good friends.” He smiled with a look of sadness in his eyes. Richie sighed with a sympathetic grin in return. 

‘There was something in the air that night The stars were bright, Fernando They were shining there for you and me For liberty, Fernando-’

Bill and Bev danced with a pretty good rhythm, he spun her and she laughed. Richie tried to distract Ben but he always had a better handle on the unrequited love thing then Richie did anyway. 

Bill spun Beverly once more and looked into her eyes. “Bev, man, I feel like I wanna k-k-kiss you..” He paused as they swayed. “You don’t have to kiss me back.” 

Beverly chuckled lightly. “I’m n-n-not kidding.” Bill said softly. 

Beverly shook her head with a grin. “Shut-up and dance.” She continued to sway and Bill did too, smile still on his face with only a little change. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mike and Ben sat on the hood of Eddie’s car, sipping on pops. “Man, Disco....” 

Ben paused, waiting for Mike to finish. 

“Isn't half bad.” 

Ben smiled victoriously and they clinked their glasses together. “I feel like something big happened tonight.” Mike gestured wildly. 

“Oh yeah?” Ben asked, a tinge of sadness in his voice. 

Mike nodded. “I don’t know what but....” He gestured with his hands aimlessly and Ben giggled. 

“You and Richie broke into the stash in the car, didn’t you?” 

Mike smirked. “Yes, we did.” 

They clinked their glasses together. “I don’t get what so wrong about that stuff? It sure helps me calm down and we, as the young generation, are onto that and I think the government knows that. And since youth is their enemy-” 

“Mike, Mike.” Ben held up his hand and Mike paused, flashing a grin. “Let’s go home, huh?” 

“Ok.” 

They hopped off the car just as Richie and Eddie exited Stan’s home. “G’night guys.” Mike waved and they returned it. 

“So you looked like you had fun tonight?” Richie smiled as Eddie leaned on the pole behind him. 

“Yeah, I did. Did you see Stan dancing?” Eddie chuckled. 

“Yeah, mesmerizing.” Richie waved his hands around, though he was genuine. He placed the back of his hand on his forehead. “Still glad to say, no Disco Fever was caught here...” 

Eddie chuckled and Richie leaned over to do the same to him. 

“Ohh but Eddie my boy, You’ve got it bad...” 

Eddie shoved his hand away but Richie only smiled. 

“Hey, do you recall that night we crossed the Rio Grande?” He asked, nonchalantly. 

“What?” Eddie narrowed his eyes. 

“I can see it in your eyes...” 

“What are you talking about..?” Eddie frowned. 

Richie just continued. “How proud you were to fight for freedom in this land....”

“Don’t don’t Richie...” Eddie waved his hands. 

“-There was something in the air that night The stars were bright, Fernando They were shining there for you and me For liberty, Fernando-”

Eddie chuckled and slapped his hand over Richie’s mouth. Richie chuckled and pushed his hand off, done singing. 

“Sorry, I hate Disco music.” He chuckled.

“Then why’d you come?” Eddie asked. 

“Well....I like you.” Richie chuckled nervously. 

“So...you’re in like with me?” Eddie laughed but Richie didn’t. ‘Oh?’ Eddie blinked. 

They both stood there silently for a minute before.... 

“There was something in the air that night The stars were bright, Fernando...” 

Eddie began to sing with a teasing grin. 

“Eddie. I really wanna kiss you right now-” 

“Shut-up and dance.” Eddie paused and started to sway and spin. 

“They were shining there for you and me For liberty, Fernando Though I never thought that we could lose There's no regret If I had to do the same again I would, my friend, Fernando-”

Both boys launched into song and dance in Stan’s driveway, completely alone. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Those who wanted to be tagged!:  @birdy-boy-uris & @iammcclame

Based on the episode: That Disco Episode 

[awesomebrazilianprincess]

It's Neymar's Time to Complete His Rise to Royalty

If Cristiano Ronaldo or Lionel Messi has anything in common with Crash Davis—if there’s any sort of cultural crossover between the archetypes of global sports glitz and minor league baseball grime—it’ll show itself when the tape recorder starts rolling. That’s when the icons in their posh private jets heed the wisdom Davis imparted on a bumpy bus, whether they’ve seen Bull Durham or not. “You’re gonna have to learn your clichés,” Crash says in the 1988 classic. “They’re your friends.”

The galácticos have little choice but to follow this advice. Combine the fanaticism surrounding global soccer with the minimal access afforded the media covering it, and you have an environment where every crumb becomes content, where innuendo is louder than insight, where the tiniest spark can become a bombshell. In short: The less said the better; be safe, not sorry. So it’s significant, then, that in the middle of what should be the most relaxing summer of his adult life, Neymar da Silva Santos Jr. is willing to let you in, share his concerns and maybe even make a headline. He can’t hide from who he is, nor from the momentous, legacy-defining season to come.

The quiet but charismatic 25-year-old Brazilian forward has never won a World Cup. He has never been named FIFA’s player of the year. And if he remains at FC Barcelona (which was up in the air as of Monday; if he’s not in Paris a week from now, it will be a surprise), he will have to wait a bit longer until he’s even considered his own team’s centerpiece. But he’s universally deemed soccer’s best player after Ronaldo and Messi, and he’s beloved in a way that neither of them ever will be. And a big reason for that is his indifference to the Book of Crash.

Neymar can’t fake it. He’s not packaged, and he’s not a ­product—and as a result, he sells lots of them: Nike, Gillette, Panasonic, Beats by Dre. In 2013 he was named the most marketable athlete in the world by SportsPro and Eurosport. In January he was ranked the most valuable player on the Euro­pean transfer market by Switzerland’s CIES Football Observatory. And in April he was the only footballer on TIME’s list of the world’s 100 most influential people. (“I’ve always been struck by his humility,” David Beckham wrote for TIME. “He’s respectful and wants to learn...He lives to play the game, and I imagine he approaches it now the same way he did as a boy.”)

Neymar says he can’t explain his inclusion on that list—and then he tries to do just that: “Maybe because I’m an athlete or maybe because I do a lot of things on social media. But I don’t know. I don’t like to talk about myself. I try to be a good role model for my son, my family, my friends, and then I try to be a good role model for the rest of the people, too. ... I try to be myself without being anything different. I’m only one Neymar—for my family, for the public. I’m always the same person.”

When Neymar acknowledges that, yes, the next 12 months, climaxing with the World Cup in Russia, will probably be “the toughest season of my life,” he believes it. The world will read those words and discuss and dissect them, and then they’ll become even more true. The spotlight is about to get even brighter, and Neymar, who’s been soccer’s next big thing for nearly a decade, will have to confront his destiny.

This was Neymar’s first summer without a national-team commitment since 2010, when his exclusion from Brazil’s ill-fated World Cup squad caused an uproar at home. Brazil has already qualified for Russia, so he’s had the chance to indulge. He hit Oracle Arena for Game 2 of the NBA Finals, sitting courtside with Formula 1 champion Lewis Hamilton and posing afterward with Odell Beckham Jr. and Kevin Durant. Neymar wasn’t at all concerned about whether the Warriors’ megastar was a fan; this was no ego trip. “I don’t know if he’s seen me play,” Neymar told SI, “but I had the pleasure to meet him.”

In another photo the 5' 9" Brazilian stood on a chair and playfully lorded over 6' 7" Draymond Green. Neymar enjoys being around famous and accomplished people—he reunited with Green in Ibiza last month—not because of how it reflects on him but because he’s a fan, genuinely in awe of what they can do.

In the last year he performed a short, silly scene in which he juggles a napkin holder in Vin Diesel’s most recent Xander Cage movie—a role only for the athlete who doesn’t take himself too seriously—and kicked a ball across Hollywood Boulevard on Jimmy Kimmel Live! He’s joined musicians onstage, singing and dancing at concerts back home.

Neymar has a piano at his house in Spain—it was there when he moved in, he says, and he has been teaching himself to play with YouTube ­videos—but at an L.A. photo shoot for this story it takes some convincing to get the man watched by tens of millions every weekend to tap out even a simple a tune on a rented grand. He sits, gets up and wanders a bit before settling back in. Songs are suggested. How about Barcelona’s club anthem, “El Cant del Barça”? A Nike marketing rep asks that the studio’s ambient music be turned up, not down, so Neymar might feel a bit less scrutinized. He’s not an action figure to be played with. He’s human; he gets nervous. He says he felt it when he met Michael Jordan in Las Vegas and when he lined up to take what would be the winning penalty kick in the Olympic gold medal game last summer in Rio. Before the confidence bubbled up at the penalty spot, he admits, he endured the “worst sensation—all of the responsibility is on you.”

The Olympics play a distant second fiddle to the World Cup, but that U-23 tournament stubbornly remained the one international competition Brazil hadn’t won. And with the 2016 Games being contested on home soil two years after World Cup humiliation (also at home), Brazil named Neymar one of its three over-age players. He delivered, scoring four goals in six matches and converting that gilded penalty against Germany. Neymar was in tears almost immediately. For him, delivering the final piece of Brazil’s trophy puzzle was an immense achievement. For the public that adores him, however, it’s still not enough.

“It was like the Yankees finishing with the best record in the regular season: O.K., that’s kind of cool, but they measure everything around here by World Cup championships,” says Brian Winter, a Texan who co-wrote Pelé’s 2014 autobiography and who now runs Americas Quarterly, a political, business and cultural journal covering Latin America. As Reuters’ chief correspondent in Brazil for five years, he knows well how the nation’s sports, economics and politics intersect; he was living in São Paulo when Germany dismantled the hosts 7–1 in the ’14 Cup semifinals. That game in Belo Horizonte, he says, marked “the start of a long descent into hell for Brazil,” which has been reeling from financial and political crises since.

Neymar’s penalty and Olympic gold offered only temporary respite. “It was cool for, like, a day,” says Winter. “It created the sensation that hosting the Games hadn’t been a total waste. But once the lights went off, it was so clear that all of the promises linked to the ­Olympics—improved policing, infrastructure—had fallen short.” Brazilians, he says, are “desperately hoping for a reason to be happy in 2018. And so often—maybe too often—Brazilian soccer and politics mix.”

So the nation turns to Neymar. Four years after the misery of the so-called Mineirazodrubbing by ­Germany, which Neymar missed with a fractured vertebra suffered in a quarterfinal Thunderdome match against Colombia, Brazil has a viable shot at redemption in Russia. The 7–1 stain will never go away, but this World Cup will feature Neymar in his prime, shouldering the hopes of a country desperate for a reversal in fortune. This is the season in which it all could turn around. The season in which Neymar might finally fulfill his promise.

"Everybody wants that Neymar be the protagonist in the World Cup,” says Ricardo Kaká, the Orlando City midfielder who was part of Brazil’s 2002 title-winning team (and who, incredibly, is the last man other than Ronaldo or Messi to be crowned world player of the year—10 years ago). “This is unfair sometimes, but it’s also because of who he is as a player, for his potential, how he can decide a game, how he’s a protagonist in Barcelona. There is going to be pressure on him.”

Kaká is certainly familiar with scrutiny, but as good as he was, he never became the long-term, tactical focal point of the Seleção. Nevertheless, Neymar looks up to the former Brazil number 10, who’s 10 years his elder. Neymar admires Kaká’s piety, and Kaká appreciates Neymar’s willingness to listen and learn. They’re both part of a text-message group reserved for Brazilian national team veterans, making it one of the most exclusive clubs in the world: Kaká, Roberto Carlos, Denílson, Elano...–Neymar joined recently, and he employed the group’s advice during the Olympics.

Kaká explains: “The first games, Brazil didn’t play so good, everyone was criticizing Brazil—and he was the most important player. He tried speaking with the press, and then I said to him, ‘Now as a player we have a very good opportunity to answer without saying; we have the field to [show that] we care and that the situation is important to us.’ In the end he won the Olympics, and that was the best answer he could give.”

The members of the group, Kaká says, believe Neymar is “very smart to understand that these guys can give him something different, something that could help.”

Brazil needs Neymar because, increasingly, Brazil is Neymar. Though rocked by recessions and political scandals, the nation has seen massive gains made by the nascent middle class over the past couple of decades. For years, socioeconomic classes “often resembled castes,” Winter says. There were five—A through E—and it’s the C that’s been on the rise.

C is roughly where you would have found a young Neymar. The son of a journeyman pro player, he wasn’t impoverished growing up on the southern fringe of the São Paulo megalopolis, but his family didn’t have much either, and making ends meet was a chore. Now Neymar takes in some $37 million per year (more of it from endorsement deals than from Barcelona), according to Forbes. He’s living the modern Brazilian dream.

“Neymar has the deepest connection with the people of Brazil of any soccer player of this generation, particularly with the rising middle class,” Winter says. “The way he talks, his street-wise charm—he appeals to that segment. He’s the best pitchman in a generation.”

That appeal also dovetails with the millennial generation. Neymar is a master of social media. His image isn’t meticulously crafted or self-celebratory like Ronaldo’s; it’s not homey or reticent like Messi’s. That video of Neymar playing soccer in a backyard with Justin Bieber is more effective than anything a consultant might stage. It’s organic and honest, a window into Neymar’s effortless cool.

He’s fashionable. And he’s got a wonderfully wry sense of humor. “Social media tends to ferret out the phonies,” Winter says. “People love watching for their idols to show a glimpse of insincere behavior—but you really don’t see it from him.”

There’s a 2011 video of a 19-year-old Neymar in the locker room at his old Brazilian club, Santos, in which he dances and sings and thrusts along to Michel Teló’s cover of “Ai Se Eu Te Pego.” The more sighs and eye rolls Neymar gets from teammates in the video, the more committed he becomes.

He’s comfortable, unvarnished and fearless in the moment—the sort of person anyone with spunk or spirit would like to be around. The clip has more than 25 million views, and Neymar has 78 million followers on Instagram, making his account the 14th-most popular in the world, a hair above Messi’s.

Ronaldo has more, but Google “CR7 dancing” and among the first few hits are clips of the Portuguese star gyrating in a pink bathing suit in front of a crowd in Ibiza and another of him cavorting on a private plane. Search “Messi dancing” and you’ll find videos of the Argentine and his wife. There’s no better illustration of the differences among the three men.

Kaká certainly sees it. “Neymar just tries to be himself,” he says. “What’s in your character [takes] you where you want to go. Messi is a little bit shy, so he wants to be more out of the light. Cristiano wants to be not just a soccer player, but also a celebrity. There’s not a rightway, it’s just a choice. Neymar is the nice guy who wants to be everywhere, but he’s humble and simple. When he takes a picture with Kevin Durant, it’s: ‘This is the man, not me.’”

The soccer-loving world may worship now at the feet of Messi and Ronaldo, but that’s humanity’s appreciation for the divine and incomprehensible. Messi plays as if there are fireworks attached to his boots—the ball moves so quickly from one side of his foot to the other that it seems to occupy two places simultaneously. He’s all controlled chaos, staccato soccer. He is a savant, essentially, who doesn’t seem to be truly comfortable anywhere but on a field, and he’s been the driving force behind a three-time European champion that’s arguably the greatest side the sport has ever seen.

If Messi is from Mars, then Ronaldo hails from Mount Olympus. He’s like one of us but better, perfected. He plays like the physical specimen he is: with strength, power and panache. He’s more attractive than the statues of him. If Neymar markets to the C class, Ronaldo aims his CR7 brand, with its underwear and fragrances, at those in the A+. The guy has not only an airport but a galaxy named after him.

Yet for all their supernatural prowess, neither Messi nor Ronaldo is as adored in his homeland as Neymar is in Brazil. Argentines and Portuguese may look up to their respective icons, but Neymar prefers to look you in the eye.

Asked if he’s a little bit Ronaldo and a little bit Messi, Neymar says, “I think I’m like that. Sometimes I’m a little flamboyant, an extrovert. Sometimes I’m quiet.”

Whether he’s their peer is less important to the soccer world than whether he’s their successor. The Messi-Ronaldo duopoly has combined to win six FIFA Club World Cups, eight Champions League titles and a boatload of other honors. But Messi is 30, Ronaldo 32. Next summer’s World Cup will be the last for each man in his prime. At some point, it must be Neymar’s turn.

The Brazilian says that FIFA’s player of the year award is “very important” (Crash Davis wouldn’t like that answer), but he shrugs when asked if and when he’ll break through. “Everything happens in the right time,” he says. “The main focus is to keep playing well, keep winning games, and when the time is right, I’ll get mine.” (I’ll get mine—that wouldn’t pass the Crash test either.)

Back in June, when Ronaldo celebrated Real Madrid’s second consecutive Champions League crown with fans at the Plaza de Cibeles, he made his case for a second straight world player of the year award with a micro­phone and a chant. The thought of it—of using a team event to tout his case for an individual honor—makes Neymar squirm. “No, I wouldn’t do that,” he says.

He attracts attention in other ways. His play, like his demeanor, borrows a bit from both Messi and Ronaldo. But whereas Messi slices and Ronaldo surges, Neymar glides. He’s smoother and more efficient than either, outstanding with both feet and blessed with the creativity and vision of his great Brazilian predecessors. But his game, like his personality, is more accessible. Train long enough and hard enough, and maybe you, too, could play like Neymar. He’s human, mortal, and he speaks with a voice the next generation understands.

This is where Paris Saint-Germain enters the picture. The powerhouse French club was always going to feature in Neymar’s story, thanks to an astonishing Champions League round-of-16 series that will live forever in the lore of both PSG and FCB. Last season was a tough one by Barcelona’s standards, and its puzzling lack of ruthlessness was exposed in a 4–0 first-leg Valentine’s Day massacre at the Parc des Princes. Neymar says he was embarrassed by the performance, and he corroborates the story that he promised friends he’d net two goals in the March 8 decider at the Camp Nou—which he ultimately did, in the 88th and 91st minutes, before setting up Sergi Roberto’s clincher in a 6–1 thriller.

On a team as loaded as Barça, there aren’t many moments when a player can and must take command. But with his European season on the line Neymar was unstoppable, and for many it seemed like a turning point on his climb to soccer’s summit. In TIME, Beckham wrote that it would “be remembered as the moment he stepped up to take on the mantle of best player in the world. Neymar is ready to make his move.

But as July came to a close, it appeared more and more likely that move might take him away from Messi and back to Paris, where PSG was looking for a way to finance the payment of his record $261 million release clause. Yes, Neymar would have to wait for Barcelona to become his team—but if and when it did, then his team would be Barcelona. If he leaves for PSG, he will join a lesser league and a club that has the cash but not the chemistry to make a deep Champions League run. In NBA terms he’d be moving from the Warriors to the Clippers. And instead of Durant, whose desire to win trumped his need to be the man—as Neymar’s did when he left Santos for Barcelona in 2013—the Brazilian would be channeling Kyrie Irving, itching to get out from under LeBron James’s shadow.

Asked which of his two favorite NBA players he identifies with more—James, who was raised in the spotlight, or Steph Curry, who came up quietly at Davidson, mirroring Neymar’s lower-profile beginnings—­Neymar chooses LeBron. Let us not forget, then, James’s ultimate decision to break from the Big Three after winning superteam trophies in Miami. In order to be soccer’s biggest name, perhaps Neymar has to shine further away from Messi, Luis Suárez and Barcelona’s band of superstars.

If he ultimately stays in Spain, Neymar must launch his assault on Messi and Ronaldo while improving on his own 13-goal La Liga campaign and helping steer Barça back to the top under new coach Ernesto Valverde. Last season’s results and the upcoming World Cup apply pressure from both sides. But Messi and Suárez relieve it, at least on the club side. Neymar doesn’t have to be the best player every time he steps onto the Camp Nou field. He’ll have to be more impactful, but he can do so while remaining true to himself. He’ll have some leeway.

If he goes to PSG, he’ll be paid like a king and expected to inspire a desperate club that hasn’t advanced beyond the Champions League quarterfinals since 1995. He’ll have the headlines and the billboards to himself. When those are shared, knocking a ball around with Bieber endears you to fans. When they’re yours alone, a Bieber moment may raise questions of focus, maturity or leadership. There will be no outlets at PSG, no excuses. Either way, he’ll also have to prepare mentally and physically for the rigors of a must-win World Cup.

But it’s all manageable. It always has been—so believes the man with LIFE IS A JOKE tattooed across his left biceps. He was Brazil’s Olympic talisman, and he was thriving at the 2014 World Cup before getting hurt. “We only have one life, so we have to figure out a way to be happy,” Neymar says. “Don’t take it so seriously. That’s pretty much it. Enjoy your life.”

Neymar’s relationship with his homeland remains strong. Not even the court cases concerning his controversial 2013 transfer to Barcelona have dented his reputation. In July, he was cleared of tax evasion in Brazil; a Spanish investigation is ongoing. (“Tax evasion,” Winter points out, “is next to soccer as the national sport in Brazil.”) Neymar’s countrymen, meanwhile, remain grateful for the gold medal and for his staying with Santos as long as he did. His Q rating is unscathed.

The only thing that could hurt him at home is, of course, failure to win in Russia. After he was forced to watch the semifinal rout by Germany while recuperating, Neymar told his fellow Brazilians, “We are going to do all we can so that I can fulfill my dream. My dream is to be the champion of the world.”

Three years later he’s asking for help. “I want to win a World Cup,” he says, “but it’s not only me, you know? There are other factors. There are teammates. There are a lot of things going on.” He’s certainly right, if the Mineirazo was any indication. But then he concludes, “I think you can be a legend without winning a World Cup.”

Maybe, but not in Brazil. Sócrates and Zico, for example, were great players and remain well respected. Many pundits think their 1982 squad, which lost to eventual champion Italy in the second round, was better than the ’94 side, which won it all. But on a team with five stars on its jersey, the bar is so much higher. “If Neymar doesn’t win at least one World Cup, as much as people love him today, he will be forgotten,” says Winter. “Brazil isn’t short of epic personalities who’ve won World Cups.”

Neymar tries to make light of the pressure. “It’s very normal,” he says. “The thing is, if you win a World Cup, they’ll tell you that if you want to be the best, you have to win anotherWorld Cup! When you’re one of the top players, this is going to happen all the time.”

Perhaps it has all felt routine until now. But the next 12 months, whether he’s in Barcelona or Paris, will be anything but ordinary. A new chapter is beginning, and while the end is uncertain, it’s sure to be blessedly free of clichés.

[herobrize]

A WRONG MATHEMATICAL CALCULATION

- Did you finally read the Communist Manifesto in quarantine? - Arthur wanted to know the instant James sat at the table with the orders of both in hand, they were in a cafeteria at the back of a gallery in the shopping center of the town, James thought of taking him to another place, more reserved, but they used to attending that place when they were in the theater course and for their happiness, no one had noticed the singer there, maybe it was because he had dyed his hair, losing his famous blond tone at the beginning of his personality crisis.

- Are you still trying to be a communist? - He laughed at the attempt to escape the subject of the ex-blond, and James laughed because Arthur laughed. The huge guy sitting in front of him, was not just part of a past that he thought he would never revisit, he was James Benji, a big name in the music industry and who was going through a difficult time in his career, it was funny how he he had no strength to fight and find a solution even though everyone around him said that what happened was not exactly bad, because well, it did not change anything at all, however he could use that moment to get away a little without being charged by everyone the sides, and when he saw it, he was already returning to his old city, where his best friend was still living, the problem was, were they still friends?

- No, I am a socialist, anyway you would not accept the ideas of this movement, - Arthur said, tasting his sweet pie, James mentally agreed without waiting for the sentence to resolve, he trusted the intelligence and observation of the other more than anyone. - it is impossible to have a balance in the financial interests of the artist with the record company nowadays that everyone consumes music in the most intense way possible, sometimes I think we want to fill our void so much that for that we have to destroy who we put as idols, like Jesus Christ, you know.

- I don't know about that part, but the rest I agree, something happened, I think you don't know, you were never very attached to that kind of way of producing music ...

- I was never connected to industrialized music, it's different, but tell me, what happened?

- A guy bought the record company where I work, and with that, he managed to have the copyright in all my songs and other singers too, everyone knew that this contract was going on, but we never really knew who was interested.

- So, before this guy, the copyright of your songs belonged to the record company?

- Yes, I can have my name strong in the market, but that doesn't change a contract signed at the age of twenty, I didn't want to think about it now, but ... I have two options, I stay at the label and see the money made with my art ending up in the hands of shit or going out and looking for another record label, the problem is how it can tarnish my image if done the wrong way.

- But James, it is obvious that you should leave if all this is affecting you so much, it must be that your defense instinct that is making you hesitate like that. To put it bluntly, he thought: Have you always been like this or have you become like that because of the books you write? Thinking about it, reminded him of the pact they made when they were in the early years of college, What if we had never done that? Had our relationship not been for the sentimental lands and had been established only in the seas of pleasure? Where would they have gone? Why am I sure we would still be together?

- I am going out, I just need some time, I need to do this without having to leave everything. - replied, totally defensive, devoured the rest of his pie and asked for one more. - Aren't you happy to see me?

- Of course I'm happy to see you again, even if the reason isn't exactly missing me. - Arthur commented in a lighter tone, it seemed that the boy had some kind of access to a range of different personalities, which he entered without effort.

- I wish I had come before, but things never worked out as I wanted, but I also invited you several times and you didn't go. - James said without realizing he was crossing his arms.

- Unfortunately Rio is a bit against me, at most I will go to São Paulo to participate in a lecture or interview about my books. - Arthur explained, drinking his tea.

Did James want to punch himself, the second or third time he had treated that conversation like a sea battle? This is not going well. And he had to admit, even if his pride hurt, that his temper was linked to freshly refreshed memories of his old life, a kaleidoscope of memories, mixing moments where he laughed, moments where he got angry, a big part of his life was linked to the boy in front of him, he introduced him to his relatives, to his colleagues, put him on his way and took it out too, now he was thinking and thinking.

- I wanted you to come back with me, - he finally revealed the real reason for the meeting. Arthur's dark eyes lifted to meet theirs, his lips parted in that surprised expression. - I need someone with me, at least for a few days.

E X P E C T A N C Y

- So, am I really the reason for your visit ...? - he dared to ask.

- Of course, Arthur, I didn't come to just vent, I always do this with my manager, I miss a friend in my life.

The others' hands ran down the polished wooden table to find his, the fingers joined in a pleasant grip, when was the last time something simple like that left him so moved?

- Arthur and James against the world, as in the old days of theater? - he asked.

- Just like in the old days of theater, only this time it will be in Rio.

- It will be really interesting, I'm annoyed that you took so long to touch, but at least it happened ...

- So, are you up?

- I need to review some things first, I'm living on rent, I need to notify the owner of the house and ...

James' thoughts were a soup of unresolved feelings that bubbled with a positive response. How ridiculous to have forgotten how Arthur made him feel, if he cursed himself for not making the proposal at that time, he would be somewhere else, producing a completely different but safe song, because he knew that if Arthur were with him, he would never have signed that contract , and if I had, I would face that moment of personal crisis knowing that I would be under the support of those who truly love. Was James happy? Would it have made Arthur happy? All these years they were separated because of a succession of idiotic fights, which I combined in a divergence of ideas to perform a horror play, enough for both of them to give up the theater and then to go after their own dreams, which was good, one became a singer, the other became a writer, two little plants that didn't share the same piece of land, grew far, far away, and now, playing luck, they were back around each other. But in the end, James had never done anything good for Arthur, now would be his chance.

"I died of missing you," he revealed, more easily. - I think I even got sick.

- But passed. - remembered Arthur.

- Not the way I wanted to.

- You should have called me, if you knew ... I would fix it.

- These years have been difficult, I think this change in my life had not happened, maybe I would still be alienated.

- What do you want to do? When I return to Rio.

- I want a simple year, to get away from them, the media, the networks, and I want to be accompanied in this.

- Yeah, it looks like a good plan. - A familiar smile appeared, small and sweet, of the boy crazy about books and tea.

R E A L I T Y

- So, am I really the reason for your visit ...?

- Of course, Arthur, I didn't come to just vent, I always do this with my manager, I miss a friend in my life.

Arthur settled himself in his chair, a little uncomfortable, James didn't understand how his request could cause such a reaction.

- I can’t do it. - he said clearly and directly.

- Why not?

If he could read his mind, he would discover that not all of those years were good for Arthur, in fact, they were the most difficult years, at the encouragement of colleagues in the group, Arthur confused his love for James, a feeling connected to the strong friendship that arose when they met on the theater course, with an unbridled passion, separating one thing from the other hurt him too much, especially when he saw James leaving the bonds that bound him in the city to go after his dream of living on music so easily, James never saw him as a suitor, never loved him as a passionate boy, however there was a time, the most confusing of all, that they started sleeping together when the rehearsals of the plays got more intense, and those nights, their bodies attracted, however so far, nothing much, Arthur had already had sex with other friends, James too, the more he did the exercise of separating events from the expectations his feelings created, the more pain he felt.

It was not a surprise when James used the one thing that bothered him about the scapegoat, to let him down without reason to feel guilty. How was it possible for them to be able to take anything further if Arthur demanded his presence at rehearsals even though he knew how difficult it was to get time off at work, when Arthur tried to defend his side, James was silent, and the more he tried to argue that the play would never would be ready in the expected time of the presentation with that attitude, cooler and dissatisfied James would be. However, to leave the city and appear with music blaring both on the internet and on the radio, his service as a waiter in the city's most chic restaurant has become a dust, instead of the huge stone in his path. Arthur suffered, of course, it was a hard blow, at first he was in limbo that consumed him for months, sometimes he spent hours trying to analyze several details in the dynamics that the friendship had looking for some sign, this obsession was decreasing as the boy wrote, on paper he wrote long paragraphs like those Jews who dedicate their lives to analyze a single passage of the Talmud, after of a year, the beginning of an improvement came, he discovered that he was good at writing, tried to create short stories about the day-to-day in the small town and posted them on a website, then some praise and criticism made him reflect on a new possibility: what if he was a writer?

- Outside of here, you would gain more prominence, more readers. - James started to argue. - You know that if I asked, my fans would buy your books like water.

Arthur nodded.

- It's true, but if you don't know, seeking fame has ceased to be a goal for me years ago.

A silence came over the table.

"To tell you the truth, I don't know what to do," the singer admitted with difficulty. - I always had this idea in my head that if everything went bad, I could find an answer in you.

- Do you still see me as an enhanced version of your ex-boyfriends?

- No, of course not.

- I think you do, I remember that it scared you to see how they gave up trying to exalt you, you never realized that they wanted a reciprocity in that? I think I was so happy to meet someone, aesthetically handsome like you and with the same tastes of mine that I put you as a priority until this was untenable.

Arthur felt bad for having chosen those words, they sounded too artificial, but what to use in place of "aesthetically beautiful" when in fact he was surprised to receive attention from a boy who attracted so many looks?

- I'm sorry if I didn't want to date you, it wasn't about that at the time, I didn't want you that way, the way you wanted to.

- I think it was a mistake to come and meet you. - he concluded. - I haven't thought about the theater in years.

It is likely that he will not return, he reflected. If you come back, you won't be looking for me again. But for him, the pain of ending what never existed was nothing compared to the pain I used to feel when I was beside him, with or without his hand in hand, with or without kisses, with or without his smell, with or without your thick voice speaking or singing. Arthur brought him kindness as a gift, and it was not enough to keep him, now that gift was part of him, only him and not whoever wanted it. Really, he thought as he managed to call the woman and ask for the bill, really, people accept the love they think they deserve. The woman came and he asked for the bill, she asked for a moment and left them alone again.

- Well, if I understand your problem, you really should leave this label, people like you always find a good offer, if it doesn't appear, look for one, it's not difficult. - advised him.

- It seems so obvious. - he said, and thought about it a bit, looking for an offer, feeling a little stupid, he thought Arthur would hold his hand, but he just took out his cell phone to check the time, did he have any appointments? - It seems so difficult now, to do something without being sure that it will not be taken from me. - there were tears in his eyes, they started to flow slowly, he wiped them with the palm of his hands.

- We are artists, James, we live in painful and incredible situations, but you were always afraid of being an artist, you will know that this is your problem.

James sincerely agreed.

- I made you hate me with no chance of returning, right?

- You let me love you in a way that I will never be able to feel it for anyone else, but I don't think I hate you for it.

- Can I try to fix this? - he asked in one last attempt. - I'm already here, it's the most I have to offer.

- I'm fine. - Arthur said firmly not to cry, because in the end he had given the answers James was looking for.

END.