#maybe ''saving homura'' was the excuse she used to fulfill her own desire of being a saviour?
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some more headcanons for this blog, some of which are old but i'm re-iterating since it's been a while:
madoka came up with the idea of her wish because she wanted to save all magical girls. but in the end, the reason she actually went through with it was to save homura, who was stuck in an endless cycle and headed towards becoming a witch. that's what gave her the courage to make the decision in that moment, though she might not fully realize it herself.
homura and madoka were always sacrificing themselves for each other. homura was the first to voice her frustrations with madoka's constant self-sacrifice, and how it hurt her, but madoka was the first to realize that homura was the same. homura's self-sacrifice hurt madoka too, and homura never considered the fact that that's what brought madoka the most pain.
as a result, after the events of rebellion, madoka was the first to decide that she was going to find a solution where neither of them had to suffer. she wouldn't accept any kind of sacrifice. she still wanted magical girls to be saved - despite knowing that that was her own selfish desire, just as much to ease her own pain as to ease theirs. but she stubbornly believed that there had to be a way for everyone to be happy.
mind you i don't know what solution that would be yet. if anyone has any ideas pls share, lol, i am desperate,
#ooc#these girls need their happy ending!!#i really vibe with the idea that in some ways; madoka can be seen as more selfish than homura.#she wants to save everyone despite knowing it'll hurt homura and potentially her friends and family#because she PERSONALLY wouldn't be able to stand the pain of not saving them.#...i know that concept kind of contradicts my first headcanon here but i'm working on it afsjdfsjdhk#maybe ''saving homura'' was the excuse she used to fulfill her own desire of being a saviour?#both of them are selfish if you look at it in one way. and selfless if you look at it in another.#but i like the idea of madoka being the first one to become aware of this and overcoming that flaw they both share#by deciding to find another way...#which in some ways is still her own selfishness at play - stubbornly trying to find a solution she knows might not exist because it's what#SHE wants.#maybe she decides that if she looks for years and finds no solution that will save everyone; she'll choose homura in the end?#hmm...#anyway i change my mind on headcanons for this particular series like all the time so i might do a 180 on these. we'll see#pls someone plot with me i am desperate......... ;w;
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