#making this post bc i still see ''i miss ash'' posts a lot

[sage-nebula]

I'm about to start episode 15 of the Horizons anime (I was really behind), and I'd just like to say once again that the PokéAni fans that refused to watch it just because it didn't have Ash and/or the TRio in it are really, really missing out.

Aside from having gorgeous animation, music, and a fresh premise, the cast of characters in Horizons is really solid. The adults of the Rising Volt Tacklers crew (Friede, Orla, Mollie, Murdock, and Landau) are all interesting and are around just enough so that the kids are safe, but that the stakes are still raised high enough so that it's believable when the kids are in danger. Because the stakes in Horizons are genuine stakes; we are shown from the get-go that the primary antagonists, the Explorers, are not just goofy guys that can be trifled with, and they haven't come up with something they want to steal on the spot after a chance encounter, either. They are genuine threats that, at least at the point I'm watching, really are too strong for Liko and Roy to handle on their own, and so they need Friede and the rest of the RVT to help them train and become stronger. This doesn't mean that Liko and Roy are helpless and can't do anything -- they do quite a lot on their own! -- but there are stakes in the ongoing plot in this anime (and there is an ongoing, narrative plot!), and the adult crew are around just enough to help out when things get dicey for the kids, who are newbie trainers.

Liko is a really refreshing protagonist; she has a lot to learn about the world still and so is curious and ready to see and experience new things, but she's also cautious and unsure of herself and her place at first, which leads to her getting lost in her own thoughts and tripped up by her own anxiety at times. But we get to see her grow; she comes out of her shell a little more episode by episode, and seeing that marked character growth is wonderful to watch. Plus, as the primary protagonist, she's central to the ongoing narrative plot; the pendant that she inherited from her grandmother is what the Explorers are after, and she takes an active role in wanting to solve its mystery, taking the step herself to not be just a damsel needing to be protected by the RVT, but instead being the heroine of her own story (something she lampshades in an early episode lmao). She has a concrete motivation for being on this journey and stake in the plot. Liko is great!

And for everyone I've seen who says, "I miss Ash," well . . . Roy's your boy! Don't get me wrong, Roy is very much his own character and person; but Roy has a lot of the same personality beats that Ash did in the later sagas (you know, when they'd truly decided to throw out all semblance of who Ash was when he was originally conceived as a character to instead be who they wanted him to be vis-a-vis what type of shounen protagonist is popular nowadays). He's extremely energetic, loves pokémon and gets along with them readily, and is enthusiastic about seeing new places. Except this wasn't just an Ash copy-paste, because we're given concrete reasons for this, too; Roy grew up on a remote island near-ish Kanto, and never left that island for his entire life. He was always told fantastical stories about faraway adventures, but never got to experience them for himself, instead attending remote schools and spending his days otherwise playing with wild pokémon in the forests on his island. In fact, Roy grew up on one story in particular: the story of an ancient adventure who journeyed with six pokémon known as the Six Heroes, including a shiny Rayquaza, to the ends of the world. And then Roy finds an ancient pokéball containing that very Rayquaza, releases it on accident, and that gives him the motivation to join the RVT so that he can chase the Rayquaza and finally set off on a journey of his own, to solve the mystery of the ancient pokéballs and shiny Rayquaza. So again, it's a unique motivation and stake in the plot! While still, also, being a character type you're likely to enjoy, if you enjoyed the Ash who acted like a rockruff in order to train his rockruff. (Because Roy? Jumped off a rock over and over to try to teach a wattrel how to fly.)

The Horizons anime has an ongoing narrative plot that the main characters are actively engaged in and have a reason to pursue. (Because I forgot to mention, but Liko's pendant responds to Roy's ancient pokéball.) They're brand new, unique characters whose personalities are informed by their background and who grow as the episodes progress, because even the episodes that are a bit more slice of life are still informing them as characters and are progressing their characters forward. The ongoing plot is never forgotten, nor is the threat; in an episode where the crew is shopping, a merchant off-handedly mentions Amethio and his sidekicks (they're the main three Explorers that the RVT have faced so far), and Friede picked up the reference and pounced on the potential lead on what their enemies are up to, and so on. You fully believe that the adult crew of the RVT has known each other forever, and they're so warm and kind to Liko and Roy when they join the crew. Not to mention Dot, Murdock's niece, who is also absolutely delightful and I can't wait to see more of her.

All in all, I cannot stress this enough, if there are any fans of the Ash anime that still haven't checked out Horizons because they feel it won't be the same . . . well, it's not the same. But it's really, really, REALLY good. And you're really missing out on something great if you continue to pass it up.

[carnivore-voyeur]

twitter is absolutely dragging per through the mud right now over that pic and ash to the point i uninstalled the app bc its a fuckin cesspit rn. you and other ghost tumblr accs are the only people i trust to be sane and fucking research before making BOLD claims too in line with stereotypes

I debated on addressing it at all, but I made a post explaining what I think of the situation with context that is so clearly missing from the conversation. I was honestly surprised that was the picture people were referring to years ago when I heard a rumor that Per was "posing with a Swastika" as that had not even registered when I first saw the image. I dismissed the rumor back then because I saw no evidence of it. Now that I know what picture it's in reference to, it most definitely is not what people think it is and I think the only reason why people have brought it up is because they need fodder to attack Per over dating Ash Costello.

As I've said before, Ash has said and done things that people have openly criticized before including being rude to fans and being racially insensitive. She clearly has a lot of problems, but we're not privvy to her relationship with Per and it's no one's job to tell him who he should or should not date. He's a grown man and he can figure that out for himself, even if we don't particularly like who he's dating. If people decide not to support him based on that, then that's their prerogative.

I don't blame people for being upset with Ash (or Per by association) as a result of the fact that she's recently performed with Disturbed whose frontman is an unapologetic Zionist. How knowledgeable she is about that is beyond my understanding at this point, but it is concerning nonetheless.

At the same time, a lot of musicians and bands that are well liked still work with them and/or refuse to cut ties with Zionists in the business. Think about the fact that most of our beloved musicians and bands in the scene have not been outspoken about Palestine, and let that sink in. Clearly this needs to be addressed on a larger scale in a way that can't be easily dismissed as "cancel culture." However, when fans act more like stans than political activists then it just enables the problem further.

I think it's perfectly fine to criticize her for that. She's been doing multiple collabs with different artists lately, and I think she's trying to revive her career after years of controversy. Still, as someone who claims to care about human rights, she should be more discerning on who she chooses to work with. I don't blame people for being critical of Per by association, either, but their criticism should make sense. One Twitter user claims you can't support Per because he supports Ash who supports the singer of Disturbed - okay, but when does that guilt by association stop? Tobias supports Per. All of the other unmasked Ghouls are friends with them, and quite a few are friends with Ash as well.

I can certainly be upset when my favorite artists associate with people who say and do harmful things. With that said, I think we need to have a larger conversation about holding outspoken Zionists accountable in the metal scene because I keep seeing bands like Disturbed and Avenged Sevenfold - both who've been unapologetically supportive of Israel, continue to get work. I think part of that is because metalheads often position metal as opposed to "cancel culture" and it's hard for fans to even have a conversation with mainstream artists without them thinking "Oh you're just trying to cancel me for speaking my mind." This goes back to metal actually being canceled politically during "The Satanic Panic." We need to get over our discomfort in being openly critical of musicians and bands we like.

It sucks, I know. I listened to Disturbed a lot in my teenage years. However, I personally have to let them go because their vocalist has done more harm than good with his political beliefs. I would love for other artists and musicians to do the same and stop associating with people like this but that doesn't often happen in the mainstream metal scene. Let's not even get into the fact that Pantera is still hailed in the scene despite multiple band members being associated with white supremacist acts, symbols, and beliefs.

All in all, though, like most of the controversies over Per's dating life that have been brought up - Per has said nothing. Per hasn't voiced his opinions on much of anything politically, which is both good and bad. He doesn't really exist online and it's hard to have any kind of honest conversation with him when you have fans DM-ing him with inappropriate or rude messages that don't have anything to do with voicing valid concerns.

I saw a Twitter fan complaining that Per blocked them on Instagram for suggesting his dog and his girlfriend are ugly. Why wouldn't he block you in that situation? If fans wanted to ask him questions about his actions or political beliefs, that's fine. That has to do with accountability. Otherwise it's normal to block harassment over things that have nothing to do with that. I'm fine with people criticizing Per as long as it's addressing the content of his own words and actions. A lot of people aren't doing that. They're just making jokes about Per being a Nazi, which isn't true at all.

[urfavisapermaregressor]

This blog makes me feel disgusting as a permaregressor. It's honestly weird that you'll put permaregressor headcanons onto young children such as Ash or Kanna, they wouldn't even know what regressing is let alone permaregression. They're still KIDS. God, I agree with that other anon. You making permaregression seem like something fun and cute and desirable is putting actual permaregressors back. I hate having the mind of a child forever. I hate how you and other age regressors act like I cannot be an adult because I'm mentally stuck in adolescence. I hate how you're putting aesthetics on something that's honestly debilitating. Permaregression should be studied and marked as a mental illness for fucks sake, it kind of feels like you're not actually a permaregressor because of how you infantilize it and turn it into something cutesy and soft and uwu baby hehe haha. Fucking hell dude.

ok if you're gonna be rude to me im gonna be rude back. my life is ruined because of being permaregressed. ive set myself back, ive missed out on so many opportunities, i will never feel adequate or equal to anyone "my age," and on top of that i have been depressed and suicidal because of this and how much it has affected my life. do you think i wanna be a kid forever? genuinely, do you think im trying to make this seem desireable? bc if a headcanon for a fictional character makes the people you've made up in your head think "hm maybe permaregression isnt serious bc someone said ash from pokemon is a permaregressor" you AND them must be extremely fucking stupid because it's an image of a character on a flag. thats not setting anyone back, also we can't be set back bc we're not oppressed?? yeah we're different but holy shit we aren't having a movement/revolution. like this isn't hurting anybody. i shouldn't have to explain shit to you but i have cried so many tears and have trauma due to this shit. i never got a chance to grow up. i am stuck as this hurt child for the rest of my life and im forced to be someone i mentally am not able to be. i wake up and cry, i avoid my parents because im so ashamed i cant be the daughter they wanted. this obviously isnt "cute" and i would kill someone to not be this way, to have a chance at being somebody who's able to function through life properly so for you to say this shit just because i put a banner with stars and hearts is fucking ridiculous you piece of actual shit. not once on this fucking blog did i say it's fun being a permaregressor because it's NOT. dont tell me that it isnt. you dont know me, you dont know who i am, and you sure as hell aren't gonna tell me how my life is and how my experiences make me feel. it's hell. and i know that, and if you wanna get pissed at me for something as unharmful as headcanoning my favs for comfort then go ahead. i really don't give a shit.

i agree with you that permaregression should be studied. i headcanon a lot of my favorite characters have adhd or are autistic becahse it brings me comfort seeing my traits and disabilities in other characters. how is this any different? its not, so get the fuck over yourself. if i and many others have to live life with this painful mental space, being an age that physically and societally isnt acceptable as my true age, then im going to find comfort in seeing characters with the same traits as me. and i can assume that goes for others as well. the headcanons make me happy and find comfort. what do you have to say for canon permaregressor characters you dumbass?

and need i remind you that ash and kanna were requests, THIS IS A HEADCANON REQUEST BLOG. if someone wants to say ash is a permaregressor that's fine. it's not canon, it's not hurting you. you will live. and also who gives a fuck?? ITS A HEADCANON OF A FICTIONAL CHARACTER. and i will direct you back the last damn anon reply if you're gonna bitch about me matching the banners i put on my posts to the color of the flag and me using kaomojis and shit. if my blog disgusts you so bad block me. if you don't and keep fighting me over literally nothing, get off anon or just fuck off pussy.

[kindahoping4forever]

Hi Crystal!

Just looked through your blog to see if I had missed any thoughts you shared on the album, but instead I saw you said you didn't post anything bc no one asked. So I came here to ask ☺️

What song surprised you most? What's your current top 3? What line(s) keeps rotating in your head? What stood out to you most on first listen? (Feel free to ignore the questions if you'd like to just ramble about the album in general. I just want to know your thoughts haha)

What did you end up thinking of the iHeartradio set list? I was surprised they didn't play Bad Omens and that Complete Mess was actually the only new song they played.

They really did look hot. Especially Ashton. I feel like it's always especially Ashton lmao.

I really appreciate you both looking for and asking my opinion! (And sorry for the delay in answering, omg this week has been a lot both IRL and in 5SOS-land 🫠)

Current Top 3 would have to be: Caramel, Bad Omens and... Moodswings? Either Moodswings or Red Line. (I should do the song sorter to see how I really feel I guess 😌) I don't know if any particular song surprised me but I think in general, I was pleasantly surprised at how much their lyricism has continued to evolve. There's so much symbolism and truly poetic imagery in this album, while still maintaining an accessibility that doesn't distract from the sometimes painful honesty of what's being talked about.

Which was another surprise for me: they talked so much about wanting this album to feel lighter and brighter than CALM, how they purposely wrote in major chords and keys, how that's what the world "needs" - and they accomplished that, this album is energetic and a delight... but also contains some of their saddest lyrics to date. 😅 I'm definitely not complaining, sad girl hours all day everyday, I actually love that juxtaposition, but that was funny to me.

Another pleasant surprise (for me anyways lmao) is how Ash-heavy this album feels - and I don't just mean how rhythm heavy it is or the fact that he actually gets lead vocals (that would've been enough though 😍) and is so audible in the group vocals. One of the things I've always loved about 5SOS is at least to me, I feel like they each have distinct songwriting/melodic voices and tendencies and so it's often apparent whose artistry is driving a song. And so to me, I hear a lot of Ash melodies and I see his large fingerprints all over some of these lyrics. Which makes me both happy and sad because like I said, this album is lowkey depressing as fuck but you know what, the man knows how to make beautiful art out of that darkness so 😌

I don't know if I'm ready to say it's my favorite album or their best album yet (historically I usually say YB is the fav and CALM is their best, for the record) but I am definitely very happy and very proud of what was accomplished here! 👏🏻👏🏻

iHeartRadio thoughts under the cut!

I really really loved the iHeart set! I saw them at Wango Tango (another iHeart event) and while I will never complain about seeing them live, their set there was... puzzling to say the least. Only 5 songs total and the only new song they did was Me Myself & I, which was only a few weeks old and had not received the radio exposure that Complete Mess had (and also a bit too mid-tempo for the set IMO).

I think they definitely made strides to correct those issues in the iHeart set and it was a dream! At a radio/festival show, the goals should be crowd engagement (which is why I think they mostly stuck to their best known songs) and giving a performance so memorable, no matter how many artists play, you're the one people go home remembering. For that reason, Teeth should always be in their festival set, even if people don't know it (and it seemed like a surprising amount did!), it slaps so hard, it's gonna be a moment whether you're a fan or not. I think they should also consider making Complete Mess a staple in that kind of set, it's also a great live moment and I think gives a good example of what kind of band they'd like to be seen as in this era. And I will never get over the fact we got No Shame/Easier/More at a radio show, that's nuts. It's what we (and More) deserve. 10/10.

[badlypostedfics]

hexter my man give us some totc!hugo analysis pre- and post-reset i beg

Yeah man ofc!

This got long so its under the cut :)

Part i

c!hugo starts off as kinda a background archivist. Doesn't do a whole lot until the morse code comes out, at which point he's like wait. Bc he spent most of his life before Viana on boats!! so ofc he's interested in doing the morse code bc it comes easy. And from that point he ends up working with the others and really begins to idolise Lume (something something respect must be earned.) And that's something he sticks with. So when Astraea starts turning everything south he still doesn't really recognize her as in charge. Sure she's making these threats and they're even coming true, but that's not exactly something he's going to take as authority. So of course, while Astraea is making her MO clear to the archivists, he's quietly making his clear to her. Something he says honestly a fair few times is that he doesn't care which side of history he stands on, he just cares that he's standing, which pretty much means that no matter what happens or how bad he needs to become, as long as he doesn't compromise on his own values he'll do it. And in this situation his values are;

- Loyalty to the archivists no matter what - Respect is something that is earned not demanded - The needs of the many outweigh the few

And these don't change at all the whole way through.

To him the archivists are an unbreakable team, so everyone including Kaz and Ash are his top priority. So when Confusion and Ender start worshiping Astraea he feels they've gone against everything he's standing for. (As has he but I'll get to that). They've betrayed the archivists, obeyed a command for respect, and are putting their own personal safety over everyone else's. 

This obviously leads him to The Incident. He gets tortured and maimed, and the worst part of it for him isn't actually the injuries. It's the fact that for a moment he actually trusts Astraea and she obviously betrays it a second later. And at that moment he actually respects her slightly more because he's so close to her that he sees her as just a person, breaking another person with her own hands. And she follows through with the scenario. She doesn't change her mind or conviction. And she chooses to enforce her command herself. So yes he's scared into calling her Lady Astraea, but he doesn't feel as awful about it because in a sick way he thinks only now does she deserve that from him.

Confusion then dies. Someone Hugo hated for being a lapdog, and hated for justifying his torture. And he's still upset about it, and he's very conflicted about the fact, so the only thing he can do really is add a new rule.

- Anyone can be forgiven once.

And so as Confusion dies, he looks them in the eyes and forgives them. And as Astraea dies he mourns. 

Year of Isolation

In the base, Hugo can barely speak, and can't use his hands. He's back to being a background archivist, but not for the same reasons. He sits in the corner on a bunk and watches Confusion's dog, wishing he could call it over or stroke it. It's about the only creature in the base he's sure might actually want to look at him out of anything other than pity. 

When he eventually gets use of his hands back, the first thing he wants to do is create. He makes a bracelet for Ender and Talia first, thanking them for helping him recover. Then lume, then the others. One for Confusion he attaches to the dog collar like a tag, and one for Weird which he stares at for about a week before he cant think about it anymore and hides it under a pile of rocks. He thinks about his new rule, which he believes in now. He believes it every time he tries to look Ender in the eyes after surviving where Confusion didn't. He believes it when he finally calls pup over and it greets him as happily as a dog does. He believes it when he covers his mouth in a mask to hide what a dead girl he half misses left on him as a cruel statement. 

And then he looks at the sigil on his hand and he makes a final bracelet. He takes it into the woods and hangs it from a tree in a bowstring he broke off of an old longbow in the cabin. Magpie is forgiven and remembered, and he loses the nerve to ever go back and check if he knows that. He stops wearing the glove over his sigiled hand and claims its to help dexterity. He seriously doubts if anyone cares. Part ii

So it's all back. Hugo deals with it about as well as anyone else. cleans himself up. The worst part about it by far are Aurora and Rue, because they were never part of his story. Astraea and Magpie are his. They've had forgiveness, they've earned forgiveness. Well, not really. But nonetheless, they have it. But Aurora? She doesn't have any claim to this story. She's the rough draft and he hates it. he doesn't care enough about either of them to do much. He'll antagonise them now, that's a change. It isn't reason or facts, it's plain aggression now. Bitterness needs something to go. He has Atty, and Ender doesn't hate him. He loves his family, his archivists, and as long as none of them are in danger he's more than willing to drink his days away in Oracle's casino until the next apotheosis hits. 

That's another thing. Calling Oracle Kaz was a habit which he finally breaks. Sure, Kaz was part of his family, the archivists, but he discovers something else. 

- You can't hold on to everyone

- (He doesn't take it in yet. Not yet.)

So he thinks about how he's changed and he realises it isn't fair. He lets Kaz and Ash go and hopes it's enough that they're here as they are. 

The first time he's invested is when house comes. Unbeliever, House calls him. He talks to Astraea in private, and god knows that's enough of a challenge. Anything could happen, a lot worse than the last time they spoke within any proximity to each other. But he has an idea. Puts it all together. None of the four in the loop have it in them to get out. None of their desires align with freedom from house; freedom from house is to be tethered to just being yourself. No one wants that, and if they do they are lying. Avery's voicemail proves this later. All Hugo wants now is to stand as he is, stand up for the archivists. He doesn't want anything for himself, he doesn't need house. For the archivists to be happy he needs house to be gone, it's his truest desire. So he pitches it to Astraea, and she takes it. 

And Hugo's always known he was a background character. But he didn't think it was like this. It could have been anything but this.

So god forbid anyone let Hugo take the fall. He's stuck, he knows it now. The eternal half survivor who watches someone better die as he's given care he doesn't deserve. And so it is that Astraea rewrites the ending to her story with the pen he handed to her and he can't even fault Magpie for being angry. He spends the last few days furiously trying to crack fate like it's morse code, but as radio static plays, the world ends again. 

He says goodbye to his beloved archivists, and with his last breaths in the world he should never have survived, he asks Magpie if he took the bracelet. He doesn't say it loud enough to be heard; the world was never about him anyway.

Post Reset.

Hugo is a background character. He lives far away from everyone. No connection, no nothing. The others celebrate being free, make up, apologise. He begins to start talking, to ask for explanation. He stops. Lets everyone go back to normal together. By the time Avery crosses that highway, his account hasn't shown the active status in weeks. Hugo learns alone on a windy peninsula in rural New Zealand his final lesson for good.

You can't hold onto everyone.

[toa-discords-legacy]

~Intro post~

Hi ya'll! This blog is gonna be the sum total of the absolute Mess that is the Mr.A au, made by the lovely toa discord (shoutout to ya'll) <3 In fact, this blog is a collective one, with many of us from the discord as your hosts for you stay here <3

FAQ

Mr.A? Now who on earth is that?

I'm glad you asked! Briefly speaking, Mr.A is an au about pjo!Apollo post-Trials of Apollo, in which Apollo becomes a school history teacher in the school Meg studies at. Shenanigans ensue with a side thing of the mist falling but you know we're gonna ignore that for now

I still don't get it....

Ah, very well. For a more proper explanation of this, check out these three posts (You don't necessarily have to read the first one, it's more of a prelude really):

Meg and mortal schooling

Mr.A's first appearance in the wild

Fero's LOVELY shenaniganry ideas about Mr.A

Make sense now?

...Not really, no

Wonderful! Let's keep going!

Most of these don't really make much sense, am I missing something?

Yep, probably! A lot of the headcannons and pretty much everything we mention on this blog requires at least some level of context, which is kinda hard to get if you weren't there while that exact discussion happened in the toa discord. For example- the blog title. "I know what vaccines are, JACOB" is about this one student that Mr.A hates in his class. Make more sense now?

So yeah, some stuff might not really make much sense, but we'll try to explain it as best as possible as we go along!

MODS

The Mr.A au has developed over a lot of different people bouncing ideas off of each other, but due to various reasons, not all of them are on this blog, so here we are!

I'm sie/si (@sierice)! I remember an unnecessary amount of facts from toa, and I love rambling about it! My tag's #mod sie, nice to meet ya <3

Hii I am your host Fero (@ferodactyl)! I spend most of my time going off about different ToA headcanons so feel free to shoot any to me :]]. My tag is #mod fero, pleasure to have yall on board.

hi i’m aly (@releasemefromthevoid)!! i’m mainly an artist (see blog icon) but i sometimes have ideas about this au in particular!! my tag is #mod aly :))

Hiiii, I'm Ash/Moth (@burning-moths)! I draw and write when inspiration strikes and I adore Apollo so here I am! I'm always happy to ramble about anything!! My tag is #mod ash or #mod moth <3

heyo i'm diya (@thestarsofnyx)!! i have an unhealthy obsession with toa and i have enjoyed watching everyone come up with these shenanigans and i also like to join in on the fun :) my tag is #mod diya

Yellow, I am Txny or Tin (@txny-dragon ), which are pronounced the same. I tend to do a lot of crack and stuff like that. My tag is #mod txny(?)

adfjjfkfd hi i’m jay/jasper/thomas (@manrats), rewriting this bc mine deleted itself :’) iiii. write and draw and cry etc etc feel free to send me anything, including (toa-related) reqs lmao. tag is #mod jay !!

Hi! I’m Kairi/Strelitzia (@rosie-kairi) and I’m the creator of the ToA Discord server! I also get bragging rights as the first person to post a fic about the Mr. A au (Which is here, btw). I like to draw and occasionally write. My tag is #mod Kairi. 🌸

Hey!! I’m Marnie (@m-arnie-xx)!! Like everyone else here, I’ve got an extreme obsession with the Trials of Apollo and also the honour of being the second person to post a fic for the Mr. A au :) My tag is #mod marnie 😊💕

[kidfoundonstreets]

last post hghhjknklnwi

istg if noel isnt found soon im gonna lose it you know what claire should do? she should get the key from sirius’s pocket and use it to open the locked door a bunch of demons just surrounded claire and made fun of her...........wack it was kinda funny tho ngl charlotte also messed around with claire, bringing up suspicions about basically everybody which honestly just lessens my suspicion about everybody if theyre putting it out there still nervous abt it tho i dont think noel did it it could just be possible his death was caused by none of the above WILARDOS POV WOOOOOOOO1!! hes been calm abt this entire thing but agh king moment 

welp im sad now so theyre all related,, and particia was basically claire’s best friend but she disappeared since claire let her into an area in grandma (dorothy’s???) house did claire step into the same room as patricia did and disappear as well. i think that can explain the memory loss if she was found by grandma something i find depressing is how the whole room is wiped except the place where the diary was. sirius hasn’t touched it in a while claire after looking at the diary still doesnt seem to remember but im happy she acknowledges it might be real THE WAY ASHE’S NERVOUS CAN I HUG HIM I FEEL RLLY BAD HE SEEMS TO CARE ABT FAMILY A LOT i really really hope we get tdoom bc he cant give an explanation why is he here?? literally what does he know he’s so sus and for what. i trust him but whats so bad that he lied about it picks ashe for who i think did it: picks ashe for who i trust most (relaistically its probably noel but idk):  mixed signals but whatever i just hope it doesnt affect anything if noel did kill sirius which i doubt he did at all and its bc of miss dorothy killing his father,, i dont think noel killed a person but i dont think he’s completely excluded from anything since his dad was brought up

aww the little skrnbunklies!!!

oh theyre kinda fucked up actually its cruel to blame claire or dumb her down to stupid for this but they are demons literally what was claire supposed to do though??

OKAY NEVERMIND EVERYTHINGS OK NOW IM HANGING THIS UP IN A GALLERY PLEASEPLEASE BE SAFE ASHE IVE GOTTEN WAY TOO ATTACHED TO YOU AND YOUR VERY SUBTLE SUSPICIOUS ACTIONS “as a member of the scp” ashe is an scp!!!! noel if hes trapping himself in his room i dont know how he’s gonna get water or food without someone bringing it to him or sneaking out,,

HGGGGGGGGG I HATE THIS GAME I DONT WANNA SUSPECT ANYONE BUT AT THE SAME TIME I FEEL LIKE ITS GONNA FORCE ME the way noel knows that. hand over ur brain rn i want to see it. the “i dont want you to die” was so painfully sweet and that also makes me sad i dont want noel to die either but if he says so it’s probably going to happen i can suspect wilardo but i think he’s just like this i can suspect ashe I DO SUSPECT ASHE but the stuff he’s revealed to claire so far it just doesn’t feel like it i can suspect noel but hsfkhiuwqhe2189e4h21ueh221j dying dying dying i dont even get it either we don’t even have a proper explanation on how sirius exactly died day 5,,,, “if only i were smarter” CLAIRE HONEY NO ITS OKAY YOURE TRYING YOUR BEST well ashe a re you hiding something????? demons keep appearing more often just to say random words that bring people down. is it the ones who died in the massacre ??

[manunelle]

{Ikerev} How many kids would they have? {Headcanon}

I’m kind of creating this post to organize my thoughts, because I want to write more about this in another post where I’ll write about how they are with their children and how I imagine their personalities. Please be aware that I imagine a different MC for each suitor, so the kids exist in the same universe lol

🖤 Black Army 🖤 

Ray Blackwell

One boy.

He was adopted by Ray and MC at age of 3. His father was one of Ray’s soldier who unfortunately passed away in duty. Since he had no mother or relatives that could take care of them, MC and Ray took him in. 

He prefers MC over Ray, but admires his dad very much!

Sirius Oswald

oh boy

This man and MC had 5 children! :) 

I kind of enjoy the thought of Sirius retiring because he wants to spend as much time as he can with his family. 

They have three girls and two boys. The order goes like this: Girl ---> Twins (boy and girl) ---> Boy ---> Girl. 

Would name his kids after flowers. 

The kids get along very well! They are really protective of each other and of their parents.

Luka Clemence

One boy as well. 

His kid is really sweet! He’s really friendly and everybody loves him at school. 

Is kind of a younger brother to Jonah’s girls. 

Talking about Jonah, he’s the best uncle ever. Always brings gifts and gives advices about anything that is troubling the boy. 

He’s doesn’t have a favorite parent. He’s close to both!

Fenrir Gospeed

Had two kids, a son and a daughterl. 

The firstborn is the boy, and the girl is six years younger. 

To his and MC’s surprise, the boy is a magic user! They discovered it when MC was bathing her baby when suddenly he started floating and giggling around. Imagine Fenrir and MC screaming and jumping around, trying to reach their son, who is having the time of his life. 

The girl is not a magic user, so she causes less trouble than her brother. She’s friends with Ray’s son.

Seth Hyde

One girl.

She has Seth’s hair and MC’s eyes, and likes to dress cute clothes and to play with her teddy bear. 

She’s reeeeaaaally shy. :< 

She probably prefers Seth over MC, but she doesn’t make it obvious. Of course, she likes her mother very much as well. But Seth’s hugs are something else. :> 

❤️ Red Army ❤️ 

Lancelot Kingsley

The next King of Hearts is a girl! 

She looks mostly like Lancelot, but her hair shape resembles MC’s. 

She’s really carismatic and smart, which means that she can hold a conversation with an adult without difficulties. 

She’s a friendly and curious little girl, always asking about how and why things work the way they do. 

As a magic user, she’s really interested in Harr’s work and gets along well with his daughter. 

Loves her dad! She looks up to him a lot and is not embarassed of asking him for advices and hugs.

Jonah Clemence

Our queen has two daughters. 

They are only 2 years apart, so they get along very well with each other. 

Honestly, they have Jonah completely wrapped around their little fingers. This man would go to the fucking moon if they wanted something from there. 

Despite being spoiled rotten, the girls are really gentle and caring with those around them. thank u so much mc

Because the younger sister is shyer, Jonah teaches his firstborn from a young age that she should always be nice and take care of her younger sister. 

They love baking! Imagine the MC and her two daughter baking cookies on the kitchen to present the man of their lives later. ;A; so cute

Edgar Bright

Edgar has one girl and one boy. 

Due to her fragile health, his daughter, the firstborn, won’t be able to become the next Jack of Hearts. She always smiles and says that it doesn’t bother her, but she gets self concious when hearing adults commenting about it. She also feels bad for passing the burden of being the heir to her younger brother. 

The boy is calm and serious, which is kind of weird bc his face looks way too much with MC’s. He’s really protective of his parents and his sister. Loves animals, just like his dad! He’s smart and strong, but is really aloof. MC and Edgar are always worried about him bc he doesn’t seem to want friends. 

The girl is bffs with Lancelot’s daughter and Kyle’s son.

Zero

One daughter! 

She has MC’s hair and his eyes. She’s really pretty! 

She’s friendly and is always smiling. Since she’s younger than the other kids of the Red Army (Kyle’s second son is actually the youngest, but he is still a baby lol), they kind of treat her as a young sister, always hugging and patting her head. 

She’s really curious around everything. Actually, her personality resembles Lancelot’s daughter’s a lot. 

Loves watching her father training with the soldiers! At the end of every session, she goes running towards him demanding hugs.

Kyle Ash

Two boys. They have an age gap of 12 years.

His firstborn had a really fragile health as a child, to the point of having to take constant shots and Kyle having to perform different treatments on his child. Seeing their child suffer was really difficult for Kyle and MC, and at some point they even thought that he wouldn’t survive childhood. However, aroung age 8, the signs of this disease started decreasing and he got better. 

Kyle is still worried about his son, so he always keeps a close watch on him to see if those symptons will come back someday. 

Because they were always busy taking care of their older son, MC and Kyle decided to not have other children. So it was a big surprise when they discovered MC’s second pregnancy. 

Surprisingly, their second son has no health problems. As a baby, he’s really serious and likes to nap a lot. 

Both boys look a lot like Kyle. The older one looks the most, while the younger has MC’s eyes. 

Mousse Atlas

Has one son. 

The boy is a MC’s appearence copy with Mousse’s personalit copy. 

Just like his dad, loves napping. 

Naps everywhere. 

Everywhere. 

Once, when dusting some shelves, Luka found him sleeping in the Black Army’s library. 

How in the hell did this kid get here? 

He always goes missing. Like, at one moment he’s standing right next do MC and in the next second he disappears. Dude??? 

Actually, he’s a magic user, which explains him disappearing all the time and reaching things that are in a place way higher than him. However, he doesn’t tell it to his parent until he’s sixteen bc he’s afraid of disappointing them (bc he heard from some idiot that magic users are way too dangerous).

💚 Neutral 💚 

Harr Silver

He has one daughter. 

She has his hair and MC’s eyes. 

Since she’s a magic user, she and Harr are always excitingly talking about magic books and researchs. He also teaches her about spells and skills unrelated to magic, such as cooking and fishing. 

She’s really shy, and because kids used to bully her at school and adults ignored the situation, she has a really hard time socializing with people that are not her family.

Loves cats! As a toddler, Loki gave her a cat plushie and she is really attached to it. 

Gets along with Sirius’s oldest daughter and Lancelot’s, but I’ll talk more about this in another post. 

Likes to sleep with her parents. It’s hard to get up in the morning bc she is pratically glued to the one she is hugging.

Loki Genetta

One son. He’s the youngest among the 17 suitors (bc Loki is fucking 19 years old in canon universe, duh). 

The boy is always stealing MC’s attention, always glaring at Loki. Loki glares back because he’s a man-child. 

Actually, they get along very well when the issue is not MC, and the boy trusts Loki a lot, sharing secrets and asking for help when in need of assistance. 

His looks and personality are a carbon copy of Loki’s. 

Always follows Ray’s son and Fenrir’s daughter around. 

Oliver Knight

One daughter, and Oliver loves her so much!

She looks a lot like MC, both in looks and personality. 

Being a bit naive, she’s always getting in trouble. Thank god her friends are always ready to rescue her! Is bffs with Sirius’s second daughter. 

Boys love her. Girls too. As a teenager, she’s always having to turn down confessions. She tries to be gentle, but some people are just too bold for her to deal with. That’s when Sirius’s daughter and son (the twins!) enter and deal with whoever is bothering her. 

She kind of has a crush on Sirius’s oldest son, but is too embarassed to admit. 

Oliver knows, but doesn’t want her to know that he knows. It’s kind of tough to hide, bc when the boy shows up at his house he’s always fumming with jealousy. 

Blanc Lapin

Mister Blanc has one son.

He’s calm and smart. 

Loves tea parties! Dad’s carrot cake is the best.

Loves his mom. Loves his dad. Loves his friends. 

He’s a sunshine. Everybody loves him. 

Dean Tweedle

Has only one daughter. 

Her looks and personality are a perfect mix of her parents’. 

Sleeps only if her dad reads to her. Otherwise, she stays the whole night staring at ceiling with a bored expression. 

Is really smart and responsable. She’s the perfect “senpai” at school. 

Is bffs with Sirius’ oldest daughter. 

She and Dalim’s son look really alike, so people are always mistaking them as siblings. Dalim and Dean always get annoyed at this.

Dalim Tweedle/Dum

Has one son.

Just like Dean’s daughter, his looks are a mix of his parent’s, but his personality is a bit different. Despite being really curious, he’s really quiet and hesitant of asking questions aloud. 

Is a magic user. 

Sees Dean’s daughter as a big sister. Is always attached to her hand when they meet and follows her around like a shadow. 

Probably prefers his mom over Dalim. 

[witchofinterest]

It’s my birthday! well, i’m making this post in advance, but i’m gonna post it on my birthday! i haven’t liked my birthday in years, but i love you all, so let’s talk about it!!! okays, it’s today! god, i love you all so much, and you’ve all given me a real sense of belonging and i wanna say thank you again! and if i somehow missed you, know i love you too, i just have a bad memory.

@foxesandmagic hey birthday twin!! yiu have lovely and you are so so nice i love any chance to converse with you!

@twinmasks you were the first person i was really friends with on here, and a big part of me feeling welcome in the community and i think you should know that! also, you are just so cool and talented, and i am always in awe of everything you say and make!

@nolanhollogay water sign besties! i adore you, it feels like we’ve been friends for 20 years allready! i hope we are friends for a lot longer, also you are one of the best people i know, and i want you to know that!!!!

@luucypevensie grace you are the sweetest girl ever!!!!!! ever!!!! you are sunshine in human form!! i love you so much!!! 💛💛💛

@whindsor hey nich!!!! i love you so much, you’re an excellent and amazing friend, and i adore you beyond words!!! god, i love you so much and i am so so proud of you, from your consistent updates to finishing your story!!!!! you put so much into life, and yiu deserve nothing but the best back!!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️

@kazinejghafa keke my beloved!!!! you are like, a real life disney princess! i mean, birds should follow you around if they allready don’t! i love you! you always make me feel like: ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💛💚❤️💛💙💛❤️🧡💛💚💚🧡🧡🧡🧡❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

@ocfairygodmother you absolutely live up to your name! you are the backbone of this community and i couldn’t be more grateful to have you as a friend!!!

@anotherunreadblog you are the mutual!!! you are so nice, sweet, cool, talented, cultured, and i could keep going on forever! love you!! 💙

@darknightfrombeyond you are the cool, slightly intimidating because their so good, mutual!!! you are also one of my sweetest mutuals, with the coolest updates! you’ve got it all! love you! ^ _ ^

@water-writings hey mel!!!!! you are so sweet and supportive to everyone and your are so talented too and i love you!! and i am so happy your at a better job now!!!!! 💙

@elenapetrova hey tessa!!! god, we’ve been friends for so long now! this is the second birthday i’ve been your friend and i hope many more to come!!! you are so strong and so good and so so amazing!!! i love you a lot and i hope you know that!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️

@taylorswiftrulestheworld heather! we just started talking, but your really sweet and talented and i had to include you!!

@perhapspearl pearl!! hello friend!!! i love whenever you rb things, and wow your writing is so good, regardless of whether it’s for your wonderful ocs or canon! and you have a gift for gifs too!! you are wonderful and talented!!

@richitozier hey mara!!!! you are so cool and you have such good taste in like, everything, and you are so fun to interact with!!!! love you!! ❤️

@lizziesxltzmxn hey Ali!!!!! you are a beloved mutual and i love talking to you and i love when you update about the things your watching/reading/etc, bc i always love to hear your thoughts on things!!!!

@starcrossedjedis hey sara!!!!!!! you are one of my favorite people ever, and even if your going through a rough time right now, your still the best, and ill always believe in you! love you a lot!!

@aceyanaheim hey acey!!!! you have the coolest ideas and i am so excited whenever i see you in my notifications and on my dash!!!! i love you!!!

@wokenhardies hey Siobhan!!! taking with you is a treasure!!!!! in fact, your a treasure!!!! i love you a lot!!!

@squirrelstone Squirrel!!! my cherished friend!!! i love you and all of your creations so so much!!!!!!! also, you are just the best!!!!!! this site wouldn’t be the same without you in it and i am so glad your here!!!

@alghulnyssa hello Flop! you probably didn’t know many others on this list, but we’re buddies and i wanted to put you here! you have the best taste in so many things! and the prettiest edits!!! your last nyssa one lives rent free in my head! and you are part of the reason i made this blog! also, i am gonna to try to be on instagram more, im sorry.

@randomestfandoms-ocs hey maddie!!! ah, you are such a good friend and i love you so much!!!!!!!!!!! you are the sweetest and super talented!!! ❤️❤️💖💖💖💜💜💜💜💜

@iron-parkr hey Rory!!!!! i am super proud of you and how you handle all your responsibilities!!! all of your stories you have out are so good and i love them all! and even more, i love you!!!!

@myoc-eansmind hey sof!!!!!!!! we haven’t been friends for too long, but you are such a good one and i love you!!!! also, you are just the sweetest!

@nightwingshero hey jodeci!!!!! your writing is so so good!!!! and i love your ocs, they have such cool and unique storylines!!! also, you are so nice and cool!!!!!!! :)

@ceruleanmusings mack!!!!! hello friend!!!!! i swear, reading anything you write is an absolute privilege i’m glad you allow!!! also, talking to yiu is always a highlight of my day!!! 💙💙💙

@raging-violets hey Ri!! Hey Rhu!!! god i love you both so so much!!!!!! from bonding over to shared interests to learning about things like narnia! being your friend is so so good!!! riley i admire your confidence in life! rhuben i admire your ability to never give up! and i love both of you so much!!!

@ben-bcrnes hey becca!!! you are so passionate about so many things and i love seeing you on my dash!!! ❤️❤️❤️

@stanshollaand hey!!! your blog and your ocs are so so cool, and even there only half as cool as you are!!! i hope to interact more in the future bc your awesome!!!

@cecesxwickedxocs hey cece!!! you are one of the most creative people i know!!!!!!! also, i love hearing about how your days going and your interests!!!

@fiercefray rachel my beloved!!!! i love you so so much!!!!!! you always come up with the coolest stuff for your ocs, and you have so many awesome interests!!!! and behind that, i just really love you a lot!!!!

@inkoutsidethelines ink!!!! hey buddy!!!!!!!!!!! you are so so amazing!!!! i love learning about you and your ocs and i hope to more!!!!

@padmeisqueen aaron!!!!!! we don’t talk a lot and i hope to change that, but from what i know you are super sweet and nice and make the prettiest aesthetics!!!!!

@the-october-reviewer hey ash!!! it’s been a minute, but if course you’d be on this post!!!! we’ve been friends for about 2 years now, if i’ve done my math correctly, and it’s been amazing!!!!! i love you so much, and i always love hearing about what’s caught your eye!

@pock-galliard sairaid!!! you are so cool and i love seeing all your posts on my dash!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

@codenamekryptonite V!!!!! hey, love. it’s been a minute since we’ve talked, but i love you so so much, so i had to our you in this post!!!!!! you are such a good person and i love you and your ideas so so much!!!!! 💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

@superspookyjanelle hey janelle!!! you put out so much quality content and i admire you so much for it!!!!

@ofbadcharacters hey gabbie!! idk if you still check your blog, but i love and miss you, and you made me feel so welcome last year, i had to include you in this post!! you are such a good friend and i really miss you! love you! ❤️

@phoebestarks hey phia!!!!!! you have the best, super intricate plots and i am constantly in awe!!!! also, you are so nice to converse with!!!

@whctsherncme-archive hey madi! you de-activated, bir i love you and you belong on this list!!!! you were such a good friend with the best ideas and i miss talking to you, and you, so much!

@mystic-scripture gwen!!!! it’s been a minute since we’ve talked, but we’re friends!!!!! i love you and your ocs so much! you always knock it out of the park from the mcgrath clan to alex!!!!! your so good!!!!

@avengiers hey ari!!!!!!!! you are so so cool, and everything you make is so so pretty, and i just wanted to tell you that!

@shanaoharas hey dylan! you stopped using this account, but i wanted to include this bc we were good friends! and i have been meaning to catch up on your excellent stories! love you a lot!!!!

@cassercole hey lizzie, you are no longer with us, but i didn’t manage to make this post when you were like i meant to, so I wanted to add you. you were the first oc creator i followed (first account, actually) and you always made me so welcome in everything! you introduced me to so many things i love and i really miss you.

[f-ngrl]

Don’t have time for proper posts, so here is some (new) music i need to rec: (links are spotify)

- no:el - trendsetter feat coogie & justhis. I don’t care that much about no:el but having coogie and justhis on the same track is a gift and you already know it’s good:D

- jupiter - freedom (3 songs). Jupiter is a member of under seongsu bridge who are a member of flocc. He’s in the military so idk if this is allowed :D his solo work before didn’t impress me that much, but he was my fav on the usb album. And now this album is amazing! He got help from usb dad paloalto and fellow flocc member zene the zilla who deliver solid parts as always, as well as usb friends toigo and 365lit whose style i usually find a bit noisy/annoying but they adjusted so well to jupiter’s perfect-level-of-chill-but-not-boring style this album presents. And the beats are perfect <3 10/10!!

- ash-b - brat of the year (full album). Hilite signed another woman! Bitiontona, h1ghr take notes!! I’ve been following ash-b for a while and her only weakness might be that her tone always sounds similar, and just personally i’m not into the sexy concept even though i support the idea 100%. But! She is a woman who does actual rap, not singing, and her songs have energy and are just good altogether. Raudi produced her whole album (he is a producer i really like) so yeah check it out! :)

- yanghongwon, unofficialboyy, gamma - drugonline gate (4 songs). I ranted before but the thing is a freaking masterpiece. Take only the first song, you think unifficialboyy’s rap is the best that happens to the song but then gamma kicks in and idk words but the vibe is different but compliments the previous parts soo well, only those few seconds are aaah ART. It’s funny bc before i only liked hongwon and the others not so much, but this time i think hongwon is the weakest and the others carry the album. (Also hongwon says the r-slur which i know is crazy common but i’ve been trying to avoid it bc it pisses me off so. Warning it’s in the 2nd song. The others don’t say it.) still d sign is my fav song and I’ve listened to the whole thing countless times. Unofficialboyy and gamma also went on raphouse on air with it and did some other promo if you wanna go see them. And i think they mention drugs less than you’d expect :D aoty if it wasn’t so short, don’t miss out.

- ourealgoat x vangdale- only late at night feat. jay park. My life is fulfilled, year blessed, i have no more wishes. Almost. But about music :D you already know. And this is only the beginning ㅠㅠ whenever you grieve old khh, remember now we have this <3

- flowsik - guk (feat. Jay park). I’ve been waiting for flowsik to release his long-announced album for a long time and dunno what’s taking so long, but it was nice to see he dropped a song. His singing sounds great but the beat is a bit..? Confusing? It sounds like what giriboy would make for a young boygroup but without the distinctive giriboy style obviously. Anyway in case you missed it.

- ranchia x m3chvnic - no excuses (9 songs). I found these 2 only bc they’re in the d.o.g. crew, they’re pretty unknown but soooo underrated i couldn’t believe they’re so good. Ranchia rapper, m3chvnic producer. Feats are unofficialboyy, swervy, gamma, seshin. Check out the beats ㅠㅠ we are lucky we have intl streaming and all. Go listen <33

- i woke up 1 hour early yet am running out of time ㅠㅠ but i need to talk abt 1 more:

- asthma - clockwork. First i didn’t like him the most in his “crew” (there’s no official crew but always the same kids together) but this album is solid! Consider he is only 18. He was on hsr4 and did everything right, was well-liked and made no mistakes, he was only eliminated bc someone else was better. The album is not an artistic masterpiece yet (a bit “basic”, but as i said solid) but he has a lot of potential! :) nice melodies and feats too :)

What i still haven’t checked out but bet is awesome: smugglers x rhody album!! Ok bye.

[glitterandgoldrush]

Have you seen the teaser??? Thoughts??? Headcanons for the show??? I love it so much 😭😭

i actually really enjoyed it!!

cooper and his dad’s relationship is great, it’s built up strong enough that it’s gonna be all the more crushing when it falls down, but we can already see kevin’s sort of strict, pushing tendencies where he’s guilting cooper into making sure he does well. i really hope that they put a lot of time & effort into this storyline bc i think it will play out well. and i must say i was overwhelmingly happy when i saw coop for the first time, chibuikem just has that big, sunshine-worthy grin that i always associated with coop so it was great to see it on screen! also low key thrilled he got the first scene bc my ass was so scared that he would be disregarded for nate&bronwyn and while that still may happen it felt like the universe was going “look ash, calm down there he is” and then we cut straight to addy and i was like oh thank godddd

addy/jake are already being set up so well, too. her insecurity, checking with vanessa, her mum criticising her, and her only relaxing once jake approves? great foundations for her arc in the book. and the scene is strrrraight from the book which i love! however it does lead me into my next point: no ashton. i already knew but it sucksuckssucks because she’s such a great part of the books and her and eli are so fun, i really really hope they introduce her later but i doubt it.

nate’s intro made me lol tho i feel like he’s turned more into like a stud than the real bad boy he was in the books. like i know he hooked up with girls in the books, but it was more like, they came to him, he didn’t really care. whereas here, he’s almost cocky and showing off about the girls he gets which book nate wouldn’t do. too hard to say so early on but it will be interesting to see how the develop that

bronwyn not having an intro! interesting…

also, the pre-detention posts semi-exposing them already…way to put everyone on edge. and certainly answers the question in the book of who would know what secret was coming up and decide to take action

i also really liked having a scene of simon and his influence, as well as janae openly showing her distaste for the other kids. we only get a tiny hint of that in oouil when she talks to addy about jake and her voice warms up to the sort of bitch session she and simon used to have

it’s nice to sort of establish that early bc it contextualises and explains a lot of her actions. like she really hates everyone else, she’s strung along and confused, yes, but she’s very much as guilty as simon here

this is A LOT but it’s all to say that i’m super excited!! it’s gonna be different from the books, by a lot, but i’m deciding to look at it as like, fan fiction! it’s just another fun interpretation of these characters that we all love so much (except our notable missing people, gone but never forgotten 😪😪)

[retvenkos]

hear me out — i know i have my newsies x hsmtmts season two au, and there’s no confirmation of a season three (although it will most likely be a summer season),,, but i already have season four (the fall semester) planned because it feels like they’re throwing out the high school musical portion of their show rn and it’s free real estate. with that, let me share my thoughts.

it’s the fall semester at east high. a lot of school funding was lost due to the blowout that was the menkies. now, we know principal gutierrez hates the arts. he has this vendetta against it, and uses this as an opportunity to cut off funding for the arts and primarily drama. this gives us an arc where miss jenn receives consequences for her actions and a hard reality check. but ofc the kids are upset, theatre is their home. and most of all, they feel like their voices aren’t being heard, especially after miss jenn pushing them so hard last semester. so what do they do??? sTRIKE. fight for their voices to be heard. you saw them in truth, justice, and songs in our key; they’re fully capable of doing that. and with that comes the decision for their fall musical to be newsies (and making it a benefit concert or whatever you call it)-

i just want this to happen bc of my newsies obsession flourishing onscreen,,, but also there are certain pros ig. like due to the central issue being the musical, you see rehearsals and problems being worked out at school more than anything. but also, casting. casting is very important. and i want to spotlight certain characters bc they deserve it !!!! at first i wanted to do ashlyn as katherine bc that’s my dreamcast, but ultimately i decided this would be seblos’ season (and ash already had her time to shine so i wanted to be fair unlike a certain season two casting ahem 🙄). with carlos as katherine, seb as jack they’d be unstoppable. but never fear, ash is def the katherine understudy. there would also be big red (and gina the understudy) as racetrack and kourtney as miss medda bc i think they’d kill those roles. and also i have this odd vision of redlyn or seblos x something to believe in. i just think they’re neat. also king of new york with ash and gina or red and ash would be immaculate.

ANYWAY this was a lot and probably overwhelming but i wanted to share this with you bc you are my fave and you listen to my ideas running rampant in real time. <3 ily forever FHSKFJS

((i’m going to sCREAM, i thought i answered this days ago, but i sent it to my drafts instead of posting it,,,,,,, kms,,,,,,,,)

i'm..... 🥺 i'm your fave 🥺 ? 🥺 i would like you give you my firstborn,,,

also, i'm still trying to process all that happened last season because it was a lot and i feel like very little of it was developed all the way, so i am 1000% down to hear about you're clearly superior ideas.

and omg, my first thought was “newsies!!!!!” when i was reading about how the principal was going to cut arts (which, honestly might not be the worst decision considering the menkies and the potential lawsuit that was ricky injuring himself and ashlyn from falling. it could have been much worse damage wise, and when you factor in the fact that they were there after hours and it wasn't locked up properly..... that's a big yikes miss jenn. and then we can't forget miss jenn's comment about ricky jumping off of something high - if anyone heard that,,,,,, yikes miss jenn. you have a big storm coming). and it could honestly be such a good arc? we could see ricky really claim being a theatre kid, and even though he has a minor role, he really fights for theatre because it's his home, now. and it’s important to him. we can see him realize the change in himself, and really accept that changing is a part of growing and just.... living.

and seb as jack is truly superior casting, since seb is arguably the heart of the theatre department, and to see him shine in a role with so much strife would be amazing, tbh. and carlos as the outspoken reporter is literally perfection. katherine was made for carlos to play.

and something to believe in??? i adore the redlyn and seblos quartet, but hear me out,,,, the cut song “then i see you again” fits their vibes better, imo. it’s less about ~we can’t be because i’m leaving~ but,,,,,, if we’re going the lily x ricky route, something to believe could be their song (because of the whole “and if i’m gone tomorrow, what was ours still will be”). either way, though, i adore it. redlyn and seblos deserve it tbh.

and !!!! brooklyn’s here???? okay, hear me out,,,, if we’re going a lily redemption arc, “brooklyn” could be north high, coming to advocate for the arts department. alternatively, we could have ej pop in for season four and (since he has influence™ and his family has been pumping money into east high for literal years) he advocates for and gives money to the arts and it helps a lot. just have him come for an episode. just give him that, lol.

[hilarychuff]

2020 Creator Wrap: Favorite Works

Rules: It’s time to love yourselves! Choose your 5 (ish) favourite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. Tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!

tagged by @chdarling my marauders era multichap queen!! last year i only did asoiaf content for public consumption and only like two fics (although CH is inspiring me to get back on my marauders bullshit in earnest) but i DID do a decent amount of ~things~ when you factor in graphics so here are my top 5 (also yes i took the opportunity to plug just about everything a week ago but i am taking it AGAIN get over it)

1. i carry it in mine - this is my jonsa soulmate au and i love it but also feel obligated to put it first regardless bc never in my life did i think i would start and then actually stick to a multichap that i updated consistently? so far i have updated every week although that is bound to die soon, very possibly tomorrow since i think i need to rewrite my chapter and i haven’t done it yet and it’s now sunday night oops. but regardless i feel like i am having fun here adapting the book canon to the show and blending them together in a way where i have a roadmap for what happens but also get to fix some of the things i didn’t like/felt were left out but also without getting too deep into the weeds of a lot of it bc it’s written in kind of an overview style 

2. howl - this is my sansa-centric scream au that i will never shut up about for the rest of my life possibly!! i love spooky movies and i love sansa and i love coming up with movie-hopping aus (or whatever) and once i hit on the right idea/casting for this one i was like.... ok yes. this slaps. i also have ideas for scream 2 and scream 3 (and maybe even scream 4 but we’ll see) and hopefully will one day actually write those but for now this is a stand alone

3. things we lost in the flames, things we found in the ashes - wait i actually forgot that for one minute i almost full-blown fell back into my agents of shield obsession. i was first and foremost a jemma stan and not exactly a fitzsimmons shipper so i was never going to fully get back into the show but there was a period of time in the early pandemic days when @hurricane and i were talking about/rewatching agents of shield a little bit and i fell alllllll into my jemma feels and while i love mack i felt the show never satisfactorily addressed mack being like “stay away from fitz” to jemma and then later on being her friend and so i was like.... fine i will write these missing scenes myself!!!!!!!!! in which they find common ground and mack develops a grudging respect for her!!!!! mack’s feelings were valid but he didn’t have the full story and i was like with god as my witness i will GIVE IT TO HIM

4. asoiaf jonsa overboard au graphic - i think of all my au graphics this is maybe my favorite so far? not bc the graphics themselves slap that hard although i do really like parts of it but bc i have always been like “how do you make an overboard plot that is not as fucked up as the actual overboard plot” and i really like what i came up with for the characters even though yeah it’s still fucked up lmfao. hoping to one day actually write this but who can say when idk

5. i carry it in mine graphics - cheating here a lil bc i can’t pick just one of the graphics i made for my fic above but i love these three and feel they are all Different and don’t have titles but i will tentatively call them by the first lines which are the old gods let me return to you which i like for purely aesthetic purposes? it is the most abstract i think of the graphics i did and the only one where i felt the color scheme was strong enough to (gasp!) also change the text font. and then this one my sister — what of sansa? i felt like i struck gold when i found that top photo of the redhead in the snow and then i also feel like the bottom one of “jon” is so good too and it is so hard to find people to put in these without them looking too modern but i felt like i pulled it off well on this one. and then if you left me here alone which actually features the actors/shots from the show in a way that i really like and is also a moment that i thought about A Lot while writing towards it and so i was really glad to find a good way to highlight it

i am not sure who did this already and also who doesn’t want to do it but for kicks going to tag mog (above) @renaissance-goth @grrmartin @chispas-and-broken-bindings @offbeatorbit @julvett idk how much some of you have produced this year but you are all wonderful and if you posted anything i want to praise it ok love you bye

[ashenhawkfeathers]

my elaborate plot so I can have both HawkAsh & Mothpool

this is unedited and all over the place and IDK if i’ll ever do anything with it but whatever gonna post it,,, og canon is stupid have this instead Anyways here is my main canon changes for Ashfur & Hawkfrost ((i’ll add more cats later)) Ashpaw grew up being friends with Bramblepaw so when Brambleclaw tried to reunite with his half brother Hawkfrost, Ashfur ended up tagging a lot a lot and the two got lots of feelings for each other but didn’t do anything about it UNTIL Brambleclaw left on the big journey and then Ashfur and Hawkfrost originally hung out bc “oh we miss bramble” but they got really gay instead Meanwhile on the journey Bramble’s compulsive heterosexuality and wanting Firestar’s approval convinced himself that he “in love” with Squirrelpaw and Squirrelpaw’s own denial and guilt of her own sexuality just went along with it ((she totally had a thing for Feathertail))Anyways blah blah journey stuff - main replacement is Leafpool fell in love with Mothwing instead of Crow and Moth was trans so she’s the eventually other parent of the trio Tigerclaw continues to train the brothers in the dark forest but this time Hawkfrost doesn’t eat up his manipulation because he develops love for Ashfur and holds bitterness @ his father for murdering Ashfur’s mother and all the angry feelings of his father never being around for him and blaming Tadpool’s death on the absence of his father etc etc Hawkfrost DOES still want him and Bramble to become like a Thunderclan and Riveclan leadership duo like he’s still ambitious and bulheaded at times - just not bloodthirsty like Tigerclaw wants them to beSquirrel flight is offended by bramble’s friendship with Hawkfrost and they have their big fight and hangs out with other ppl, Ashfur 100% sees her a niece in this canon and is just protective over her like he is with his sister Leafpool and Mothwing do the run away thing - Hawkfrost distraught that his sister is gone goes to Thunderclan to get Bramble to help, Squirrelflight lashes out on them, but Firestar intervenes wanting the safety of his daughter and says he’ll let Bramble go look for Hawkfrost, Squirrel protests a little but calms down when Ashfur offers to go with them as well ((no one knows of Hawk and Ashfur’s relationship))Leafpool gets the dreams of Thunderclan being under attack and Spottedleaf persuades her to go back Mothwing is sad about it but says they’ll always have excuses to see each other being medicine cats On their way back they’re meet with Hawk, Ash, and Bramble who are relived to see that they are safe and sound However they don’t dawdle as Leafpool gets a strong vision of Thunderclan under attack and they run to their aid Hawkfrost at first tries to argue with his sister to leave the Thunderclan cats on their own but refuses to go without helping and he relents because he wants to protect Ashfurblahblah tragedy Cinderpelt dies (cries) which seals Leafpool’s fate as being the medicine cat of Thunderclan Hawkfrost and Mothwing return home IDK prob some very Gay shit happens between Hawk and Ash during the battle idk who will see but it happens Over at Thunderclan, Firestar accepts Greystripe’s “death” and makes Bramble deputy Hawkfrost seeing his brother be named deputy and still being prideful brat wanting to be leader and adored by the clan still encourages Mothwing to make a fake sign about Stormfur and Brook but big reason for this is Hawkfrost blames Stormfur for Feathertail’s death and Feathertail was one of the few cats who was always friendly to Hawkfrost and Mothwing etc etc Tigerclaw tries to encourage his sons to be bloodthirsty and take the leaderships themselves, alone he belittles and shuns Hawkfrost into doing what he wants Hawkfrost sets up the trap for Firestar but tells Ashfur what’s going on out of guilt and asks if he will save Firestar before it’s too lateAshfur rush with Firestar’s daughters to save them but Brambleclaw and Ashfur are still fighting because they’re both conflicted on their own loyalites Ashfur pushes Brambleclaw out of the way to save Hawkfrost and gets an injury in the process with makes Hawkfrost panic as he never saw Ashfur bleed so much beforeHe willingly goes with as a poisoner because he’s afraid Ashfur to die without him and Firestar observing this eventually has a discussion with Hawkfrost when Ashfur is deemed safe Hawkfrost in emotional exhaustion and protectiveness of his mate admits to Tigerclaw training he and his brotherFirestar says he can leave and he won’t tell Riverclan of his attempt to kill him if he breaks ties with Tigerclaw Hawkfrost is conflicted but talking with Ashfur when he first awakes he reluctantly agrees to Firestar’s terms Leafpool discovers she is pregnant with Mothwing’s kits and panics telling her sister that she needs to pretend she is having Brambleclaw’s kits - Squirrelflight who was on the path to accepting she was a lesbian and not attracted to Brambleclaw finds herself back to square one and fake her own happiness with him for her sister’s safety Mothwing is aware of Leafpool’s pregnancy and is angry with the concept of clans and only wants to be with her mate, one day she vents to Hawkfrost about all of this, Mistyfoot over hears Mothwing’s (nonexistant) beliefs about starclan and tries to get Leopardstar to throw out Hawkfrost and Mothwing for “scheming” against their clan as Hawkfrost escalates with argument way too fast and Mistfoot acts like a dick bc of her anger with Hawkfrost mostly Hawkfrost and Mistyfoot have a physical fight to where Mothwing defends her brother before Mistyfoot gives him a fatal injury Feeling betrayed by Riverclan Hawkfrost no longer longs to be leader of a group of “cowards and traitors” This leads him to tell his sister that they should just go to Thunderclan and be with their mates Stormfur tries to argue that Hawkfrost is just like Tigerclaw but Firestar welcomes the siblings Hawkfrost not wanting to be around Stormfur hints that he should return to Riverclan which the two consider this or returning to the tribe Hawkfrost is very melancholy and negative, only cheered up by the presence of Ashfur, and cold toward other Thunderclan cats Mothwing eagerly tries to convince Leafpool to be truthful about their kits and it causes a lot of stress and arguments between the two- Squirrelflight over hears one of this and begs her sister to go with the truth as she doesn’t love Brambleclaw and knows Thunderclan will come to accept Leafpool Leafool eventually agrees and a lot of cats are disappointed or unhappy with her but Firestar silences their disapproval and accepts his daughter and her mate Mothwing publicly being the parent of Leafpool’s kits is what seals the deal for Hawkfrost and Mothwing staying in Thunderclan During the next big meeting Leopardstar, conflicted, tries to convince Hawkfrost and Mothwing that they belong in Riverclan and that Mistyfoot was too harsh on them But Hawkfrost very aggressively denies this suggestion, he is extremely bitter against Riverclan which gives Mothwing the courage to say no as well even though Leopardstar pleads they dont have a proper medicine cat The gathering gets very heated but Brook offers to medicine cat if Riverclan were to welcome them back and Leopardstar and Mistyfoot agree Leafpool eventually gives birth to the Trio, taking place in the nursery as Mothwing takes over being official medicine in the meantime and the clan upset that Jaykit is born blind but his mothers love him regardless Hawkfrost actually becomes a very stubborn defend of Jaykit’s potetional as a warrior Hollykit being super close to her mother’s and thus becoming very engrossed in medicine still becomes medicine cat appretience Lionpaw still gets Ashfur as a mentor but Ashfur is less of an OOC asshole Brightheart works hard with Jaypaw to use his blindness to his advantage and Hawkfrost becomes a second pseudo mentor as the clan still feels too weary about Hawkfrost to give him an appetence but it’s his sister kit and ppl believing Jaypaw cannot become a warrior bc of the blindness pisses Hawkfrost off Hawkfrost is the first to learn of Jaypaw being able to walk amongst other cats dreams but encourages him to keep him to himself as the clan would use “any excuse” to have him not be a warrior

[howlermemes]

                                       𝐟𝐨𝐥𝐤𝐥𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐛𝐲 𝐭𝐚𝐲𝐥𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐰𝐢𝐟𝐭                                                l  y  r  i  c    s  t  a  r  t  e  r  s

✽  long post ahead bc i have no self control ! ✽  change pronouns / punctuation as needed . ✽  some lyrics are explicit. ✽  some themes are slightly darker. ✽  alteratively, send    ♫ 𝚏𝚘𝚕𝚔𝚕𝚘𝚛𝚎    to have a lyric automatically generated & said to your muse instead .

[ track 01 ]   the 1 ❛ I'm doing good! I'm on some new shit. ❜ ❛ I thought I saw you at the bus stop. ❜ ❛ I hit the ground running each night. ❜ ❛ You know, the greatest films of all time were never made. ❜ ❛ If you wanted me, you really should have showed. ❜ ❛ If you never bleed, you're never gonna grow. ❜ ❛ It's alright now. ❜ ❛ We were something, don't you think so? ❜ ❛ If my wishes came true, it would have been you. ❜ ❛ In my defense — I have none for never leaving well enough alone. ❜ ❛ It would have been fun if you would have been the one. ❜ ❛ I had this dream you're doing cool shit, having adventures on your own. ❜ ❛ We never painted by the numbers, baby. ❜ ❛ We were making it count. ❜ ❛ You know the greatest loves of all time are over now. ❜ ❛ I guess you never know. ❜ ❛ It's another day of waking up alone. ❜ ❛ If one thing had been different, would everything be different today? ❜ ❛ It would have been sweet if it could've been me. ❜ ❛ In my defense, I have none for digging up the grave another time. ❜

[ track 02 ]   cardigan ❛ When you are young, they assume you know nothing. ❜ ❛ Baby, kiss it better. ❜ ❛ I was your favorite. ❜ ❛ A friend to all is a friend to none. ❜ ❛ Chase two girls, lose the one. ❜ ❛ To kiss in cars and downtown bars was all we needed. ❜ ❛ You drew stars around my scars and now I'm bleeding. ❜ ❛ I knew you tried to change the ending. ❜ ❛ I knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss. ❜ ❛ I knew you'd haunt all of my what-ifs. ❜ ❛ I knew everything when I was young. ❜ ❛ I knew I'd curse you for the longest time. ❜ ❛ I knew you'd miss me once the thrill expired, and you'd be standing in my front porch light. ❜ ❛ I knew you'd come back to me. ❜

[ track 03 ]   the last great american dynasty ❛ How did a middle-class divorcee do it? ❜ ❛ The wedding was a charming, if a little gauche. ❜ ❛ There's only so far new money goes. ❜ ❛ Their parties were tasteful, if a little loud. ❜ ❛ It must have been her fault his heart gave out. ❜ ❛ There goes the last great American dynasty. ❜ ❛ Who knows, if she never showed up, what could have been. ❜ ❛ There goes the maddest woman this town has ever seen. ❜ ❛ They say she was seen on occasion, pacing the rocks, staring out the sea. ❜ ❛ In a feud with her neighbor, she stole his dog and dyed it key lime green. ❜ ❛ Fifty years is a long time. ❜ ❛ Who knows, if I never showed up, what could've been. ❜ ❛ I had a marvelous time ruining everything. ❜ ❛ I had a marvelous time. ❜

[ track 04 ]   exile ❛ I can see you standing, honey, with his arms around your body. ❜ ❛ I think I've seen this film before, and I didn't like the ending. ❜ ❛ You're not my homeland anymore. ❜ ❛ What am I defending now? ❜ ❛ You were my town. Now I'm in exile, seeing you out. ❜ ❛ I can see you staring, honey, like he's just your understudy, like you'd get your knuckles bloody for me. ❜ ❛ You'd get your knuckles bloody for me. ❜ ❛ Those eyes add insult to injury. ❜ ❛ I'm not your problem anymore. ❜ ❛ Who am I offending now? ❜ ❛ You were my crown. Now I'm in exile, seeing you out. ❜ ❛ I'm leaving out the side door. ❜ ❛ There is no amount of crying I can do for you. ❜ ❛ All this time, we always walked a very thin line. ❜ ❛ You didn't even hear me out. ❜ ❛ You never gave a warning sign. ❜ ❛ I gave so many signs. ❜ ❛ All this time, I never learned to read your mind. ❜ ❛ I couldn't turn things around. ❜ ❛ You never turned things around. ❜ ❛ You didn't even see the signs. ❜

[ track 05 ]   my tears ricochet ❛ If I'm on fire, you'll be made of ashes, too. ❜ ❛ Even on my worst day, did I deserve, babe — all the hell you gave me? ❜ ❛ I loved you, I swear I loved you, until my dying day. ❜ ❛ I didn't have it in myself to go with grace. ❜ ❛ You're the hero flying around, saving face. ❜ ❛ If I'm dead to you, why were you at the wake? ❜ ❛ Look at how my tears ricochet. ❜ ❛ We gather stones, never knowing what they'll mean. ❜ ❛ You know I didn't want to have to haunt you. ❜ ❛ What a ghostly scene. ❜ ❛ You used to tell me I was brave. ❜ ❛ I can go anywhere I want. Anywhere I want, just not home. ❜ ❛ You can aim for my heart — go for blood. ❜ ❛ You would still miss me in your bones. ❜ ❛ I still talk to you when I'm screaming at the sky. ❜ ❛ You had to kill me, but it killed you just the same. ❜ ❛ You turned into your worst fears. ❜ ❛ You're tossing out blame, drunk on this pain, crossing out the good years. ❜

[ track 06 ]   mirrorball ❛ I'll show you every version of yourself tonight. ❜ ❛ When I break, it's a million pieces. ❜ ❛ Hush. ❜ ❛ You'll find me on my tallest tip-toes, spinning in my highest heels, love — shining just for you. ❜ ❛ I know they said the end is near. ❜ ❛ I can change everything about me to fit in. ❜ ❛ You're not like the regulars. ❜ ❛ I'm still on that tightrope. ❜ ❛ I'm still trying everything to get you laughing at me. ❜ ❛ I'm still a believer, but I don't know why. ❜ ❛ I've never been a natural. ❜ ❛ All I do is try, try, try. ❜ ❛ I'm still trying everything to keep you looking at me. ❜

[ track 07 ]   seven ❛ Please picture me in the trees. ❜ ❛ I hit my peak at seven, feet in the swing over the creek. ❜ ❛ I was too scared to jump in, but I was high in the sky. ❜ ❛ Are there still beautiful things? ❜ ❛ Cross your heart. ❜ ❛ Though I can't recall your face, I still got love for you. ❜ ❛ Love you to the moon and to Saturn. ❜ ❛ The love lasts so long. ❜ ❛ I've been meaning to tell you, I think your house is haunted. ❜ ❛ Your dad is always mad. ❜ ❛ I think you should come live with me. ❜ ❛ We can be pirates! ❜ ❛ You won't have to cry or hide in the closet. ❜ ❛ Our love will be passed on. ❜ ❛ I used to scream ferociously any time I wanted. ❜ ❛ Pack your dolls and a sweater. ❜

[ track 08 ]   august ❛ Salt air and the rust on your door — I never needed anything more. ❜ ❛ I can see us lost in the memory. ❜ ❛ August slipped away into a moment in time, because it was never mine. ❜ ❛ I was see us twisted in bedsheets. ❜ ❛ August sipped away like a bottle of wine, because you were never mine. ❜ ❛ Will you call me when you're back at school? ❜ ❛ I remember thinking I had you. ❜ ❛ It was never mine. ❜ ❛ You were never mine. ❜ ❛ For me, it was enough to live for the hope of it all. ❜ ❛ I canceled plans just in case you'd call. ❜ ❛ Meet me behind the mall. ❜ ❛ So much for summer love and saying "us". ❜ ❛ You weren't mine to lose. ❜ ❛ Do you remember? ❜ ❛ Remember when I pulled up and said "Get in the car." ❛ I was living for the hope of it all. ❜

[ track 09 ]   this is me trying ❛ I've been having a hard time adjusting. ❜ ❛ I didn't know if you'd care if I came back. ❜ ❛ I have a lot of regrets about that. ❜ ❛ Maybe I don't quite know what to say. ❜ ❛ I'm here in your doorway. ❜ ❛ I just wanted you to know this is me trying. ❜ ❛ I got wasted like all my potential. ❜ ❛ My words shoot to kill when I'm mad. I have a lot of regrets about that. ❜ ❛ I was so ahead of the curve, the curve became a sphere. ❜ ❛ I ended up here, pouring my heart out to a stranger. ❜ ❛ I didn't pour the whiskey. ❜ ❛ At least I'm trying. ❜ ❛ It's hard to be at a party when I feel like an open wound. ❜ ❛ It's hard to be anywhere these days when all I want is you. ❜ ❛ You're a flashback in a film reel on the one screen in my town. ❜

[ track 10 ]   illicit affairs ❛ Make sure nobody sees you leave. ❜ ❛ Tell your friends you're out for a run. ❜ ❛ You'll be flushed when you return. ❜ ❛ Take the road less traveled by. ❜ ❛ Tell yourself you can always stop. ❜ ❛ What started in beautiful rooms, ends with meeting in parking lots. ❜ ❛ That's the thing about illicit affairs — and clandestine meetings and longing stares. ❜ ❛ It's born from just one single glance, but it dies and it dies and it dies a million little times. ❜ ❛ You leave no trace behind. ❜ ❛ Take the words for what they are — a dwindling mercurial high, a drug that only worked the first few hundred times. ❜ ❛ They show their truth one single time, but they lie and they lie and they lie. A million little times. ❜ ❛ Don't call me "kid". ❜ ❛ Don't call me "baby". ❜ ❛ Look at this godforsaken mess that you made me. ❜ ❛ You showed me colors you know I can't see with anyone else. ❜ ❛ Look at this idiotic fool that you made me. ❜ ❛ You taught me a secret language I can't speak with anyone else. ❜ ❛ You know damn well, for you, I would ruin myself a million little times. ❜

[ track 11 ]   invisible string ❛ I used to think I would meet somebody there. ❜ ❛ Teal was the color of your shirt when you were sixteen at the yogurt shop. ❜ ❛ Time, curious time. ❜ ❛ Were there clues I didn't see? ❜ ❛ Isn't it just so pretty to think all along there was some invisible string tying you to me? ❜ ❛ You ate at my favorite spot for dinner. ❜ ❛ She said I looked like an American singer. ❜ ❛ Time, mystical time — cutting me open, then healing me fine. ❜ ❛ Something wrapped all of my past mistakes in barbed wire. ❜ ❛ One single thread of gold tied me to you. ❜ ❛ Gold was the color of the leaves when you around Centennial Park. ❜ ❛ Hell was the journey, but it brought me to heaven. ❜ ❛ Time, wondrous time, gave me the blues and then purple-pink skies. ❜ ❛ It's cool, baby, with me. ❜

[ track 12 ]   mad woman ❛ What did you think I'd say to that? ❜ ❛ Does a scorpion sting when fighting back? ❜ ❛ They strike to kill, and you know I will. ❜ ❛ What do you sing on your drive home? ❜ ❛ Do you see my face in the neighbors lawn? ❜ ❛ Fuck you forever. ❜ ❛ Every time you call me crazy, I get more crazy. ❜ ❛ When you say I seem angry, I get more angry. ❜ ❛ There's nothing like a mad woman. ❜ ❛ What a shame she went mad. ❜ ❛ No one likes a mad woman. You made her like that. ❜ ❛ You'll poke that bear 'till her claws come out and you find something to wrap your noose around. ❜ ❛ I breathe flames each time I talk. ❜ ❛ They say "Move On," but you know I won't. ❜ ❛ Women like hunting witches too, doing your dirtiest work for you. ❜ ❛ It's obvious that wanting me dead has really brought you two together. ❜ ❛ I'm taking my time. ❜ ❛ You took everything from me. ❜ ❛ She should be mad, should be scathing like me. ❜

[ track 13 ]   epiphany ❛ I think he's bleeding out. ❜ ❛ Some things you just can't speak about. ❜ ❛ With you, I serve. With you, I fall down. ❜ ❛ I think she's crashing out. ❜ ❛ Only twenty minutes to sleep. ❛ You dream of some epiphany — just one single glimpse of relief. ❜

[ track 14 ]   betty ❛ I won't make assumptions. ❜ ❛ I think it's because of me. ❜ ❛ One time, I was riding on my skateboard when I passed your house. ❜ ❛ It's like I couldn't breathe. ❜ ❛ You heard the rumors. ❜ ❛ You can't believe a word she says most times. But this time, it was true. ❜ ❛ The worst thing that I ever did was what I did to you. ❜ ❛ If I just showed up at your party, would you have me? ❜ ❛ Would you want me? ❜ ❛ Would you tell me to go fuck myself? ❜ ❛ In the garden, would you trust me if I told you it was a just a summer thing? ❜ ❛ I'm only seventeen. I don't know anything. ❜ ❛ I don't know anything, but I know I miss you. ❜ ❛ I know where it all went wrong. ❜ ❛ I was nowhere to be found. ❜ ❛ I hate crowds. You know that. ❜ ❛ I saw you dance with him. ❜ ❛ I was walking home on broken cobblestones, just thinking of you. ❛ She pulled up like a figment of my worst intentions. ❜ ❛ Get in. Let's drive. ❜ ❛ I dreamt of you all summer long. ❜ ❛ I planned it out for weeks now. ❜ ❛ It's finally sinking in. ❜ ❛ Right now is the last time. ❜ ❛ I can dream about what happens when you can see my face again. ❜ ❛ The only thing I wanna do is make it up to you. ❜ ❛ Will you have me? ❜ ❛ Will you love me? ❜ ❛ Will you kiss me on the porch in front of all your stupid friends? ❜ ❛ If you kiss me, will it be just like I dreamed it? ❜ ❛ I don't know anything. ❜

[ track 15 ]   peace ❛ Our coming-of-age has come and gone. ❜ ❛ I never had the courage of my convictions, as long as danger is near. ❜ ❛ It's just around the corner, darlin. ❜ ❛ I could never give you peace. ❜ ❛ I'm a fire and I'll keep your brittle heart warm. ❜ ❛ All these people think love's for show, but I would die for you in secret. ❜ ❛ The devil's in the details, but you got a friend in me. ❜ ❛ Would it be enough if I could never give you peace? ❜ ❛ Your integrity makes me seem small. ❜ ❛ I talk shit with my friends. It's like I'm wasting your honor. ❜ ❛ Is it enough? ❜ ❛ I'd give you my sunshine, give you my best. ❜ ❛ The rain is always gonna come if you're standing with me. ❜

[ track 16 ]   hoax ❛ This has broken me down. ❜ ❛ This has frozen my ground. ❜ ❛ Give me a reason. ❜ ❛ Your faithless love's the only hoax I believe in. ❜ ❛ Don't want no other shade of blue, but you. ❜ ❛ No other sadness in the world would do. ❜ ❛ I am ash from your fire. ❜ ❛ You know I left a part of me back in New York. ❜ ❛ You knew the hero died, so what's the movie for? ❜ ❛ You knew it still hurts underneath my scars. ❜ ❛ You knew you won, so what's the point of keeping score? ❜ ❛ It still hurts underneath my scars. ❜ ❛ What you did was just as dark. ❜ ❛ Darling, this was just as hard as when they pulled me apart. ❜

[kreidewaltz]

YEAR END LOVE.

happy holidays and advance happy new year everyone!! this was supposed to be for christmas but.. yeah hope u had a great time w your loved ones <33 this is for my friends who helped me get thru shitty times, who made me laugh so hard, and made me feel appreciated :) to my mutuals, thank u for taking ur time to talk to me!! any interactions from u guys makes me so so happy <3 im proud of you for getting through this year!! this is gonna b a long one .. hehe <3 sorry if i didn't mention u!! i still love u :( this is in no particular order dw dw ily all d same

to my followers, mutuals, and people who likes my stuff in general ツ

AAAAAAA guys ily you rock !! thank u for supporting me and just being there for me (esp for the ones who listened and stayed w my shit !!) ty for liking, reblogging about my stuff, or just interacting w me!! pls pls talk to me let's have some good convo hehe i hope no one will send me or any blog hate bc that isn't cool >:( happiness and love only are allowed people!!!

@sunakissses ツ

my bestie, my bae, babe <3 you rock val if im honest :( even tho we haven't been friends for a long time, we just clicked !! and yeah talking to u is just makes me at ease n u have that comfy vibes :)) and our interactions r so funny and wholesome <33 i just love when im talking to ya you know :(( and idk i love ur supportive aura whenever i do something hehe :( lets keep going next year and be more closer >:) and yes u and suna r going to be the cat's first ever aunt and uncle <3

@romaune ツ

okay .. the literal meaning of sunshine, yes you gracie baby :( you're so wholesome i wanna cry thats me 2 u !! i love your aura and just everything, i get so excited when u reply to my asks fr, because ure so enthusiastic n i like that a lot !!! :( ik we don't talk a lot yet but from our interactions (or just us screamin abt our mans winks) i know i gained a friend, a good n funny friend for that:) and ure so like hinata i wanna squish and hug and talk to!! i love how we scream abt our ongoing suna brainrots HAHA can't forget that <33

@cryoqi ツ

people put ur hands up 4 the coolest person ive met !!!! >:( istg you're so kind and so funny even if thats not ur intention T_T at first i was intimidated by u but then yeah <33 we vibe :( only the real ones know abt us and me bein your bread anon <33 ure rlly great and can't forget d time us and dove sang thru texts ...? yes that i cried while laughing HAHA, and yes i love the way u write 2!! so you and just amazing overall :)) n yeah i like to talk to u a lot in the server !!! ure so funny & relatable at times hihi

@miyasangel ツ

arden bae !!! you're so ... cool and pretty and one of the people i want 2 talk to in here <3 you're like cool and the way you write is chefs kiss >:( and i love it whenever we talk abt random things AHSHS and when we talk abt atsumu <33 i love love that !! n yeah good thing i interacted w u b4 on ur old blog and get to talk to you more !!! i was so shy n nervous while sending you asks sometimes LMAO idk why :(( ure rlly a great friend <3 n i think u also became a factor on why im liking inarizaki :D

@cafemiya ツ

omg hail to issy !! i know we don't talk that much yet but i literally like u a lot >:( you're rlly great w your long fics !! n handmade heaven lead me to you and ur asks <3 and you're so chaotic too HAHA i like that :) dw ill always shower u w compliments bc u so deserve it bby !!! and i squeal sometimes when u reply to my asks w the same energy :(( n yes i just love you and your vibe in general <3 and im so excited 4 the collab !!! <3 thanks for reaching me out hehe or my slowburn fic journey wont happen :( anw ily and keep slayin issy baby!!!! :D

@kuro0luvr ツ

omg kieran .. the big phat supporter of chlojime is here people !!! <3 i just love loooove talking to you esp in the server & we scream abt anything n everything :( and thank u for always giving me support and everyone else when we're down!! you're one of my sunshines 2 :( i love how we just talk and instantly b close friends you know!! even tho we dont chat like in dms we r so close hehe :( and yes ill never forget how happy u got when i complimented that u have akaashi vibes <3 ty for being a good friend n supporter to me :(((

@oikawasbliss ツ

milo everyday !!! >:) i missed our interactions tbh :( you're just so chill n i vibe w u a lot!! your themes omg i want em its so aesthetic and everything <3 and uhm i love ur love for oikawa >< i mean who wouldn't but whenever i see smth kawa related i think of u immediately T_T and yes ure just so so cool :(( lets talk more soon gah and maybe talk abt aot hehe smirks <3 and yes i just like ur themes and vibe a lot <3 lets talk more soon gah >:)

@himichii ツ

I KNOW we didn't talk really like until few weeks ago but ... you're so funny and kind n lowkey sweet HAHA u were so intimidating before i can't talk 2 u <//3 but im glad i did !! not me writin this and listening to the playlist u made for me :( omg thank u for that and the other that u posted, i felt nostalgic and (good) sad on d inside <3 HAHS lets talk more omfg idk what 2 say :( OH oh ure a greatt writer :( the angst u sent yesterday made me sad gah <3 let's talk more in the new years!!! :(

@hajimine ツ

oml lexy bae where do i start??? omg ily like <3 because you're so nice n sweet n so funny 2!! glad i started participating in your ask games and on that we became friends hehe :( i love how we just talk abt anything on your asks <33 like ur life keeps me entertained HAHA and when u became more chaotic n all that .. i liked it!!! :( and oh u write so well if u didnt know >:( can't wait 4 more interactions w you bae !! <3 and ugh omg ily <3 literally cannot express how much :( you have good vibes n i wanna have that too !! and love how we just scream over one man ;D

@lcaita ツ

omg kai ... hi <3 HAHS sorry if im so awkward wtf but ure so cool and so funny !!! i like ur vibes always even tho ure not always around <3 and when youre around i just get happy !!! >< for some reason i love ur name hehe and uhm i love ur aesthetics hehe on ur acc !!! >:) and yes thank u for being a kind friend hehe :( lets talk more next yr abt anything!!! maybe abt ur mans (kaashi, semi, others) hehe ;)

@kemochie ツ

nea !!! i just . wanna say that you're a sweet human being :( and deserve the world :( ik we didnt interact much yet but !!! i love u already n your aura in general <3 and i just get soft on ur username for some reason T_T i love our little interactions from time 2 time n i wanna boost that more on the new years!! <3 idk i like u :( that's it thats my say :(

@nightmareupondaydream ツ

kana baby !!! im so grateful for u whenever u send me sweet words at random times ... and when i need it <3 and i missed our chats in dms :( lets do it again sometime !! im gonna be here for u okay :( and you're so sweet fr i love u,, and yeah just talkin about how shitty life is or how my writing goes, let's do that on the new years oki!! <3333

@ravscrii ツ

thank u for being there like really >< ik u have own probs to solve but you still helped me :( ty for being a great listener and supporter hehe <3 u deserve great things !!! and pls dw okay we're good even tho we arent talking that much :( i miss that hehe n ure a kind and funny person ASHS esp in the server ur replies n everything make me laugh :( lets talk more soon like the old times AAAAAA i miss it hehe <3 and goodluck on genshin HAHA pls entertain me w it even tho i don't play </3

@rintaroll ツ

olivia babe <3 omg i missed u sorry 4 not checking on u :( forgive me <//3 just wnna say u totally made my 2020 better n a little more bearable <3 i like ur vibes sm and ur name .. olivia wow i like it :( and oh you're so aesthetic like ur blog in general ??? hello pls step on me :( and u also influenced me (for some reason) to like tsumu more ?! which i dont mind at all .. i like it when we scream over tsumu or i tease u n him getting horknee :D yeah and god i can't forget the time we fangirled over gojo on ur asks ... and u sent me gojo gifs which made me scream <3 one of my unforgettable moments w ya!!

to my hajime anon + mod ツ

thank u for always being here :( and you just chatting w me makes me so happy <3 i hope you'll see this hehe and just thank u and ily yknow :( when im down or happy, or shitty you're just there, supporting me always <3 im so grateful for that!! and hajime anon mod ily :( thank u for taking ur time to chat w me and make me so happy hehe <3 take ur time okay :)

to my baby, stella ツ

AAAAAAA idk if you'll see this but shoot me an ask if u saw :( uhm i love ur vibes and you're so cool !! promise <3 and your theme changes r always so beautiful <3 pls pls i love you so much agh im so worried when u deactivated :( pls dont overwork okay whenever ure working :( i love talkin to u always in ur asks !!! ure so sweet and lovely grr >:( u deserve all d good things okay ily stel :((