#love how folks like me are schrodinger's queer

[telperinquaar]

Me, a nonbinary person: Stop using "enby" as an umbrella term.

Tumblr user @bookerbluedragon:

Well gee, I wonder what kind of person would use a label for someone that they explicitly asked not to be called?

Oh, the blog's dead? Well, maybe I'll go check out one of these other ones!

"DNI if you're in anyway queerphobic"

So, the TLDR of it all is that it's okay to disrespect a queer person's preferred terms if they don't agree with you! Thanks @bookerbluedragon! It's so good to know that my experiences and preferences as a queer person don't matter to you simply because you dislike what I say. It really makes me feel like I belong here.

Microaggressions against non-binary people that you might be saying without realizing it

"All of my trans brothers & sisters"/"Do you have any brothers or sisters?"

"Every man, woman, and child" (referring to all people)

"Are you a boy or a girl?"/"Is it a boy or a girl?"

"Both men and women"

"The opposite gender"

"Boys and girls! Settle down!"

"Good evening, ladies and gentlemen"

"He or she"/"His or her"/"Him or her"

Pleeeeeease stop saying these 🥰

Add your own if you have any <3

[queernoctis]

here’s a Disk Horse post because my dysphoria gets set off by dumb things and i need to be salty

“SGA and Trans” is a bad approach to defining the lgbt community and is nothing more than exclusionary gate keeping. It does not account for non-binary people properly in anyway, even when you get the leeway of substituting ‘same’ for ‘similar’. Im non-binary and my gender is all over the place, partly because it always has been, and prob partly because of trauma. How can i know what ‘similar’ genders to mine are when im not even sure what my gender is most days [if i have one]

Then there’s me not being entirely sure anymore if im ace or bisexual, and still trying to grapple with how my abusive relationship impacted my views on romance/sex and my attraction to people. I know what types of people im attracted to, but it’s not easy to put a name to it.

im i sga some days but not others?? do i have to exit and enter the lgbt community?? schrodingers queer??

“but noct!” you might say “aren’t you trans?? so the sga requirement wouldnt effect you cause you’d be in anyway.” Yes, i do identify and determine myself to be trans and i love being trans. but here is. the little itty bitty thing. im not trans by Everyone’s standards. I dont have a major amount of dysphoria [writing that during a dysphoric episode actually makes me more dysphoric but them’s the breaks] and i dont plan to physically transition beyond getting a breast reduction. For transmedicalists and truscum, i am nowhere near ‘trans enough’

“well, those people dont matter anyway!” that is also true and i dont give a shit what they think about my gender. But it is an issue.

So you have people that would argue that im not SGA, and you have people that would argue im not trans either. So there exists significant movements in the lgbt community that seek to push me out entirely. which is Ridiculous because i have as much in common with a cisgender allo-het person as a rock does.

And how in the hell is sga discourse going to keep cis people and some binary trans people from sorting non-binaries/Nbs into their “closest” binary gender. Male-Aligned/Female-Aligned or sometimes just pushing us back towards our agabs, when some of us want absolutely nothing to do with binary genders, and extra nothing with our assigned genders. It makes my skin call to think that someone will look at me and see my body type and presentation and sort me into the “lady like” box for their discourse because apparently they missed the Trans Allyship 101 lesson that you cant tell someone’s gender just by looking at them.

this is long and rambly bu basically, im super tired of people I like/liked and thought i could trust continuing the ‘sga’ definition even after i explain why it’s hurtful and exclusionary to me as a non-binary bi person. I haven’t seen any attempt to reconcile sga discourse with non-binary identities besides substituting ‘same’ with ‘similar’. Which is why more and more i identify with self-identified queer folk+the queer community than lgbt communities