#look I know my blog's name is also a CoF reference but they're still special to me

[ghost-in-the-fog]

Y'all wanna read about some cringy shit I did, as a fifteen year old baby bat, ages ago?

-All my information came from online sources, probably written edgy teens themselves, who had no idea about where goth originated from in the 80's.

-One thing that kept popping up was that you HAD to have a goth name. After some careful thinking I chose mine. It was 'Darkness Eternal'. Yeah. I know. 🙃

-The really cringy part about it? We had to journal in two classes. And that's how I signed off, at the end of every. Single. One.

-I went around thinking Avenged Sevenfold was goth. And then I got into Cradle of Filth. (My older sister, who's ten years older and still goth-y to this day, was proud of me lol)

Note: I actually still like CoF, and so does my sister. But we both know it's not a goth rock or darkwave band. If anything, CoF introduced me to a different subgenre of metal.

-I'm sure you can guess where this is going, but I thought CoF was the gothiest band to ever goth. (And then I turned eighteen and discovered The Bauhaus and Virgin Prunes.) I walked around the school with my headphones blasting 'Dusk and Her Embrace' on the daily.

-I had the biggest crush on Dani Filth. (Still kinda do tbh. But Jonny Slut and Rozz Williams are the prettiest men in goth music, and y'all can fight me)

-One website said to keep a journal and to write goth poetry in it. So, I did. Half of it was Edgar Allan Poe inspired shit, the other was 'woe is me, I'm so sad.' There was at least one in there, where Dani Filth was my muse and how hot he was. A few years after I graduated, I found the notebook again, aND THREW IT IN THE TRASH.

-Another article I read, said 'you must not smile or laugh.' And my dumb, young ass really tried. I actually have a rather bad case of RBF.... But anybody who knows me, knows it is stupidly easy to get me to giggle. Throw the right Billy and Mandy or SpongeBob quote at me, for example, and yeeeeeah. 🙃😬

(I know you're reading this Meph, and you'd better keep those 'giggle goth' comments to yourself, darling!)

-I dressed as goth as I could but unfortunately, I was under the impression that you need expensive ass clothes and outfits, and we were- and still are- too poor for that bullshit. I absolutely love modding my own clothes these days, and go thrifting when I can. My sister taught me how to cut clothes and the handy nail clipper trick.

-I'm pretty sure I hissed at people once or twice. It runs in the family, apparently lol.

That's all I can think of for now. I eventually did discover actual music from when goth was starting out in the 80's, but it took a little while. I've dipped my toe into Industrial too but outside of NIN and Skinny Puppy, I don't really listen to Industrial as much. I mainly stick to Goth rock and Darkwave.