#loml best performer

[seokmatthewz]

SEOK MATTHEW ✧ BOYS PLANET EP.8

↳ bonus: congratulations on 4th place, matthew!!

[tulsa24]

jeremy jordan & eva noblezada are going back to broadway in two months and i am absolutely overjoyed

[darthmatthewtwihard]

Taylor Swift is the Greatest Singer, Songwriter, and all-around Best Artist and Person in History and I will always support her in absolutely everything she does because Taylor is always right.

Also, Taylor Swift is without a doubt The Greatest Poet in history as well and I truly pity anyone who disagrees with any of this as they are obviously delusional and have horrible taste.

Lastly, anyone who does not absolutely love Taylor Swift with every fiber of their being is clearly a terrible evil hate-filled ignorant monster.

are you not entertained?

[chobunz]

── jay’s body. ( pjs ) 🔪

๑ A string of gruesome murders have been plaguing your small town with fear, there hasn’t been many leads on who this unnamed killer could be but never in a million years would you suspect that it was someone you were so close to…

pair/genre: popular jock!jay ㅊ nerdy!f!reader, dead dove do not eat, college au, jennifer’s body au | warnings: horror, pwp, angst, smut, humor/dark jokes, set in the late 2000’s, jay is your childhood best friend, yandere/incubus!jay, mentions of depression/anxiety, childhood trauma, graphic descriptions of death and violence, gore, cheating, manipulation tactics, dub-con, virginity loss, d/s dynamics, piv, fingering, oral (m + f. rec), rough s.x, biting, slight knife play, unprotected s.x, breeding kink | words: 18.3k+ (holy shit i’m insane..)

**please heed ALL warnings before reading, i am not responsible for the content you consume !!

[ song inspo: mascara, do you believe, & cherry waves by deftones ]

this is a really long one compared to all of my other fics ! i’m happy with the outcome of this so i hope you all like it !! i poured way too much time and effort into this writing so reblogs and comments are highly appreciated <33 big thank you to the loml @p4ranormaluv for beta-ing my fic, ilysm muahh

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

“you should come.” jay’s figure hovered over your desk, his face so unbearably close to yours that one wrong move could lead to both of your lips accidentally colliding. “please y/n? it’ll be fun, i promise !” his former pout returns to guilt trip you even further.

you stood your ground and shook your head, leaning back into the chair for more breathing room. this wasn’t something out of the ordinary for him, jay constantly invaded your personal space, never believing in boundaries when it came to you— and he’d get even more obnoxious by persistently asking to hang outside of classes.

“no jay, i already told you before that i have homework to do..” you remind him yet again for the umpteenth thousand time, as if he didn’t already know that, not bothering to put much thought into considering his dumb little offer.

for the past hour or so he’s been bugging you about going to some dive bar downtown with him. it seems a lot of people were attending since a locally known indie girl band, ‘sweet venom’, is going to be performing there tonight. jay would always rave about their music once he discovered them on myspace, growing quite the infatuation with the lead singer in particular. you really weren’t all that interested in going, you weren’t even a fan, plus you had way more important things to worry about. and besides, concerts weren’t your thing anyway, you’ve always hated large crowds— gives you an inducing amount of anxiety.

“ugh, why’re you so lamee, it’s like you’re allergic to fun..” he whines, dragging out his words which only made him sound even more immature. he’d never miss a beat to poke fun at you for being such a goody two shoes. “we’re not getting any younger y/n, keep going at this rate and you’re bound to end up an old, shriveled up cat lady who’s gonna die a miserable virgin !”

his snarky comments about your dry sex life didn’t phase you as much as they used to, but after a while you do get sick of hearing them all the time. to be frank, you aren’t even sure why you and jay were still such close friends, maybe it’s because of the deep rooted history you two share, dating all the way back to when you were in kindergarten; or simply could be the fact that no matter what, jay refused to never leave your side— ever.

you’ve had one too many disagreements and blown out of proportion arguments with him over the years, yet he’s never held any of those things against you, it’s practically a clean slate the next day. you’ll never understand why he’s so adamant on keeping this friendship alive when you’re just so vastly different from each other. he’s athletic, outgoing, extremely popular amongst his peers— and especially with women, of course.

jay will never admit it out loud, but he’s always enjoyed being the center of attention, not to mention he was blessed with a well above average face that he used to his advantage quite a bit. he’d often came off as pretty arrogant and crude to most people, he honestly had no filter when it came to voicing his own opinions; but that was the allure of him, made his charm even more magnetic to the dozens of girls who’d fawn over him on a daily basis. he acted as though all eyes weren’t on him, yet he secretly relished it. if he wasn’t stroking his own ego, best believe there’d be someone who would.

you glare at him, wishing he’d just shut up already and go bother someone else for a change, but you know that’ll never happen in this lifetime. “i’m actually in a very loving and committed relationship.. so i rebuke that statement, thank you very much !” you quickly fire back, gathering your textbooks and other supplies, shoving them into the compartments of your black messenger bag.

“soo, i’m guessing mark’s dick isn’t really all that satisfying enough for you ? ‘cause you still act hella cranky all the time… must not be that good,” jay couldn’t help but chuckle to himself, deciding to further agitate you. “oh, who am i kidding.. you probably haven’t even let that bastard kiss you yet.”

if you weren’t so mentally drained from the 6 hours you’ve just endured of back to back classes, you’d be beating his ass to a pulp right here and now. “we’re taking things slow !” you defend yourself once more, lifting from the chair as you’re about to head out the door, to which jay follows behind to continue his rampant taunting spree.

“it’s been 6 months y/n, how much more ‘slow’ can you take it ?” a group of girls wave at him as you walked through the corridor, but he ignores it and keeps walking like the pretentious asshole he is. “bet the dude gets blue balls everytime he sees you.”

you stopped dead in your tracks for a second, turning around to face him only to be met with a smug grin settled on his lips. the fact he gets such a kick out of constantly teasing you made it all the more aggravating, but eventually you caved in, as per usual.

“ugh, fine.. what time is it ?” you inquire, watching how he instantly lit up at your question. you knew he would’ve been moping and complaining for the rest of the day if you didn’t go with him. anything to get him to finally shut up..

“it starts at 9 but i’ll pick you up at 8:30 !” jay caged his arm around your waist, pulling you into a half hug. “oh, and make sure to wear something good.” he quickly adds.

“um.. i always wear good clothes ??” a scoff leaves your lips, slightly offended by his critique of your clothing choices.

“really ?” he spoke sarcastically, eyeing the oversized crewneck sweatshirt you wore with cats printed all over, “this isn’t middle school anymore, it wouldn’t kill you to show a little bit of cleavage once in a while.”

you flat out ignore his comments. not even wanting to entertain his bullshit anymore, if anything it would only lead to a petty argument that’ll sour your mood for the whole day. you’ve learned the hard way that sometimes— well most of the time, letting jay say whatever he wants was the best option, which is why he always gets away with it. he’s always been the more domineering one of the friendship, whilst you just sat back and let his menacing behavior go unchecked. you hated that you were such a pushover when it came to him but you’d rather just let it go than have a full blown argument that could potentially lead to him having an irrational outburst.

“i gotta go find mark, i’ll see ya later.” your mind shifts back to thinking about your boyfriend who was most likely waiting for you out in the courtyard.

“ew, whatever bye.” a look of faux disgust bestowed on jay’s features, there was no inherent issue he had with mark— just didn’t really like the guy. he felt as though he was slowly being replaced by him, which is why he latched onto you even more than ever.

once you said your final goodbyes and parted ways, you head down a long flight of stairs to go search for your boyfriend. eventually catching him off in the distance as he’s sat on a bench outside, immediately going up to hug him.

“hey babe,” mark happily greets as you embraced him, embedding a kiss to your cheek, “missed you.”

“hey, sorry i showed up kinda late.. got a little sidetracked on my way to you,” you make up a quick lie as you don’t wanna fully admit that jay was the reason for your semi-tardiness.

“got any plans tonight pretty lady ?” he asks with his arm looped around your shoulder as you sat beside him, he was hoping to spend more time with you since you’ve been so cooped up in the library studying for upcoming exams.

“well… yeah, kinda. i’m going to this concert thingy with jay tonight.” there you go, not even a minute in of seeing your boyfriend you’re already bringing him up. it’s always jay, jay, jay— this was really beginning to irritate him.

“oh..” he sighs, visibly tensing up every time he hears that dreaded name slip from your mouth. he knew this was how it usually went down, whenever he asks to spend time with you somehow jay would always beat him to it. mark truly felt like your so called ‘best friend’ was the main perpetrator of sabotaging this relationship.

“we can still hang out for a bit before that !” you suggest, attempting to try and lighten the atmosphere, but mark still wasn’t too thrilled to hear that you were going to be with jay for the whole night instead of him.

you know that mark never really liked jay, and jay also never really liked mark either. it was an odd, unspoken tension between the two but you couldn’t quite seem to put your finger on how or why it all started. mark was more adjacent to your personality, you’re both bookworms, lovers of all things pertaining to math and science, and you lived in the same honor’s apartment complex, which only housed the smartest students of the whole university. jay however… he was a spitting image of everything you strived not to be. rebellious, put very minimal if at all any effort into his studies, was borderline narcissistic, and easily irritable around others. it was like a ticking time bomb with him, you never knew exactly when he’d go off.

“yeah only for like two hours..” mark sulked in discontent, sinking lower into the seat. “you always do whatever jay tells you to do, it’s like you don’t have a mind of your own sometimes.. feels like you enjoy being with jay more than me..”

“that’s not true !” you fire back, “he’s my best friend.. that’s it. you know you mean the world to me,” you anxiously express, fidgeting with the silver, heart-shaped friendship necklace that you and jay both had since elementary school. “my roommate should be gone, i have the whole place to myself, come !” quickly, you grab his hand to lead the way back to your place.

“agh.. okay, better be lucky that you’re cute..” mark jokingly adds, letting you pull him away to the next destination.

๑ ๑ ๑

“so.. which one is he stalking online again ?” mark asks out of curiosity, comfortably sat on top of your bed, referring to jay’s new obsession with this girl band.

“the lead singer of this band, he said she’s like ‘100% his type’ or something, i dunno.” you said nonchalantly, skimming through your wardrobe in hopes of finding an outfit that jay would approve of, you couldn’t dress too revealing as it would only attract unwanted attention from random creeps, but you also didn’t want to present as too “modest” as you’ll only get teased even more than you already were by your best friend.

“huh.. interesting..” he slightly nods, reaching over to play with one of your stuffed bears that you’ve had since childhood. “i still don’t get why he couldn’t just go with someone else or by himself. he doesn’t need you there..”

you don’t answer, instead you were too preoccupied with trying on various tops, unsatisfied with most until you find a dark purple top that was a bit more form fitting. it showed your midriff just a little bit but it wasn’t too much that it would deem as “slutty”, at least in your humble book of opinions. checking yourself out in the vanity mirror to see how you look, you paired the top with some light wash flared jeans that you bought recently while out at the mall with jay.

you weren’t too keen on buying them at first but he’d convinced you to get them anyway. standing in front of your reflection, you barely recognized yourself. you don’t normally wear these types of styles but according to jay, you have to wear ‘good clothes’ so you kind of felt obligated to. finishing off the look, you took off your glasses, replacing them with contacts that you rarely wore, you’ve always hated that you struggled to put them in but it wasn’t so bad this time around.

“um, do you really have to wear such low rise jeans..? i can see your womb for pete’s sake !” mark sounded reminiscent of an overbearing dad the way he voiced his concerns, it was safe to say that he was definitely not a fan of this new look you were going for.

you playfully brushed him off, “quit being so dramatic, you’re just not used to seeing me like this is all !” you giggle at his overprotective nature, suddenly hearing a loud knock at your door from downstairs, “oh- that must be jay !”

you hummed a soft tune as you make your way down the stairs, swinging the door open to your best friend who’s grinning ear to ear, throwing your arms around his shoulders to embrace him in a hug.

“i see you actually took my advice,” jay says proudly, staring down your whole body as he examines your outfit, “we good to go ?” he asks, looking effortlessly cool in a pair of ripped black jeans and a white graphic tee that he bought from spencer’s.

“yup, i think so !” you nod in content, quickly grabbing your high-top converse that laid on the floor, they were a little beat up and had doodles all over them all because jay got bored one day and decided to scribble on the shoes without your knowledge. it added more character to them you suppose…

“i’d really appreciate if you stopped kidnapping my girlfriend all the time.” mark grumbles in annoyance, heading downstairs to kiss you goodbye. he possessively grabs ahold of your waist to show jay that he wasn’t the only man in your life that you adored— he hated that this has now become an unfriendly competition of who could gain your attention more.

jay scoffs, paying him little to no mind. “it isn’t kidnapping if she’s willingly going on her own accord, right ?” he said in his usual cocky tone, mark was getting more agitated by the second, if this were an animation, steam would’ve definitely been blowing out of his ears right now.

“listen dipshit i’ve had—”

“ok knock it off you two, enough !” you cut your boyfriend off before he could go any further, “you guys really need to stop, seriously..”

jay’s demeanor softens the minute he hears your voice, as if you’ve snapped him out of a trance, “he’s just jelly ‘cause he’s not invited, let’s go.” he links arms with yours whilst heading out the door, faintly hearing the jingle of his car keys clashing together as he swung them around with his free hand.

a part of you feels like you’ve created this whole mess between them, you’ve noticed this mini rivalry ever since you began dating mark. jay has never been one to give newcomers the warmest of welcomes, he’s constantly had this protective and territorial nature towards you, was just how he is. though sometimes, he’d take things a step too far. whenever he feels like you’re slowly drifting apart from him, he does everything in his power to drive a wedge between you and the other existing person. you and jay have always been a tight knit duo— a packaged deal if you will; and he isn’t too fond of other’s being added into the mix, he’d try convincing you that all you needed was each other— no one else ever mattered.

that was until you met your boyfriend mark of course, jay rarely ever conversed with him nor was he ever all that kind to him, but you managed to still work things out regardless of your best friend’s disapproval. in more blunt terms, you don’t think jay would’ve approved of anyone you date, he was harder to please than your own father and that in itself spoke volumes… on the contrary, you wouldn’t have much of an issue if jay were to magically show up with a girlfriend one day, but within these past two decades of knowing him you’ve never seen him date a single soul, he could literally have any girl he wanted, hell, they were practically lining up to even be near him. yet he didn’t bother giving one of them the time of day, he preferred his own solitude; except when he’s around you, that is.

๑ ๑ ๑

you had no idea what to anticipate when arriving to this place, but soon as you and jay walked into the establishment, you were invited with a completely different atmosphere than you expected. the way jay kept talking about this place you’d assume it’d be more of a nightclub ambiance but it was more or less like your average, run-of-the-mill bar where everyone went to watch the sports game on the weekend. sure there were a lot of people here but it just wasn’t the overall kind of vibe you mesh with. from it’s dingy, beer stained walls, to the generic pop music that blared through the speakers, there was a pool table in the corner occupied by a bunch of frat boys you recognized from school. your eyes landed on your past crush heeseung, who you never confessed to but still silently admired from afar to this day. you thought he was way out of your league, plus he was already dating someone else which made you harbor those secrets even deeper.

you sat at an empty booth, flipping open your phone to text mark who’s been asking nonstop if everything’s okay, though you’ve told him multiple times not to worry. there were a few girls who tried talking to jay but he seemed quite unamused by them, his mission was to talk to this band that he was fangirling over, you’ve never seen him this excited over anything.

“come with me,” jay suddenly pulls you out of your seat, making you go towards the front of the stage with him. he was smiling like an idiot, walking up to them confidently as he always did. there were a total of 5 women, all dressed in various types of leather and spikes, black filled their waterlines to look more edgy, their teased hair stayed in place with the shit ton of hairspray they used— pretty much your stereotypical rock band aesthetic. whether it was intentional or not, you didn’t know, but they definitely didn’t seem like the approachable type.

jay makes the first move, introducing himself along with your presence. “hi, i’m jay and this is my best friend y/n, i’m a huge fan of you guys ! i’m surprised you came out all the way here, aren’t you from the city ?” he sounded like such a groupie, you never took him as someone to kiss up to others, but there’s a first time for everything you suppose.

a woman with fluorescent pink hair spoke, you assumed it was the lead singer of the band since she held a microphone in her hand, “nice to meet you, i’m scarlett, but you can call me scar. yeah.. we’re a bit far out but we like to connect with fans all over, gotta start somewhere y’know?” jay nods, looking at her as if she held the key to a world he’s never seen before.

“can i buy you a drink ? the options are pretty slim but there’s these red and blue drinks that i think are kinda good. gotta drink ‘em fast though or else they turn this weird brownish color…” jay asks, hoping to give off the impression he’s older than he actually is.

“sure, thanks.” she replied, winking at him as she prepares to set up for the performance.

“great, i’ll be back right !” he turns around in a flash, tagging you along with him for the journey.

“uh, jay we aren’t over 21 yet..” you remind him, confused as how he was going to even pull this off, but he shuts down your doubtful attitude.

“i think you underestimate just how easily i can get anyone to do anything for me y/n.” he makes his way over to the bar with a confident stride, not even sweating the fact he may or may not be denied.

as jay was busy getting the drinks you overheard the lead singer, scarlett aka scar, talking to the bassist, you couldn’t help but get closer to eavesdrop on their conversation once you heard your best friend’s name being dropped mid convo.

“yeah that guy’s definitely a virgin, he talks big game but i know he doesn’t get girls..” she giggles to them. your brows furrowed in slight confusion and anger, not only was he being overly friendly with them but they were taking his kindness as a sign of weakness.

“hey that’s my friend you’re talking about, bitch !” you intervened, quickly coming to his defense, “whether he is one or not, it’s none of your damn business and he’s sure as hell not going to sleep with some washed up skanks like you.” you couldn’t believe those words even came out your mouth, but when it came to jay, you weren’t just going to sit back and let them talk about him like that.

“what’s going on ?” jay interrupts, coming back with the drinks as he noticed a sudden shift in your behavior.

“they were just talking about you !” you point over to the girls, still fuming with rage, “they said you were a virgin !”

“oh.. i mean does getting sucked off in the locker rooms by half the cheer team count ??” he jokes, snickering to himself when he remembers that moment.

you face palm, “that’s not the point, jay !” you were genuinely getting upset, why would it even matter if he was one or not ? why were they so hung up on knowing that to begin with ?

before you could say anything else or speculate any further, the lights suddenly dimmed, and the band introduces themselves to the crowd that was formed around you. scar went on a whole spiel about how they’re so grateful to be here and saying how they hope to bring more fans with this performance, they were promoting their new single, ‘bloody roses’ which you thought was a pretty corny and cliché title but nonetheless you were only here in support of your friend.

as the band started playing their first song, everyone began head banging to the music, including jay who was more than excited to be here. maybe it was because of the previous encounter you just had with them, but the music wasn’t necessarily hitting for you. it wasn’t the genre per se, you enjoyed bands such as hole, nirvana, and metallica, but they just seemed like complete rip offs of those said bands. it seemed like you were the only one who thought this way considering everyone else was vibing around you— especially jay who was singing along to every lyric word for word. you seriously couldn’t wait for this night to be over with..

not even ten minutes later, you heard a blood curdling scream off in the distance. your body stilled with uncertainty, wondering what could’ve possibly triggered such harrowing emotions, yet that was soon dissolved once you saw the burst of flames invading your vision. a rush of panic kicks in as you finally register what exactly was going on and the only thing on your mind was to get the hell out of here. everyone else had the same idea as you, bodies scrambling left and right, hurriedly trying to find an entry to freedom. you checked to see if jay was following behind you still but he wasn’t, he was gone. and so was the band.

you shouted his name as loud as you could, eyes becoming bleary whilst trying to find the nearest exit, pushing all the other attendees out of the way as the only thing you cared about in this moment was getting to safety and finding jay. you remembered that the bathrooms had a small window so you made a mad dash to the stalls, praying to god that you’d be able to fit through.

surprisingly there was no one else there, grabbing a step stool from the corner to help you climb up and ease your way out. profusely coughing from the smoke that lingered underneath the door, you use all your strength to pry the window open, body running solely off adrenaline. relief washes over you when you’re able to successfully get it to crack just enough to squeeze your body through, gasping for oxygen once you’re finally met with the outside world again.

you looked back and see that the entire bar is now ablaze– with people still inside. you watched as parts of the building collapsed, crumbling to the ground as more people were coming out. you’ve never witnessed anything more horrifying, hearing the cries of others shouting for help as they were locked in with no way out. some were so badly burned that they looked unrecognizable, their scorched skin bubbling from the third degree burns. you couldn’t bear to see such chaos but you couldn’t look away. this sight was going to be engrained into your memory for the rest of your life..

anxiety struck through you when you realize jay was still nowhere to be seen, you still had your cellphone in your pocket which you debated on calling 911, but you assumed they’d already be on the way with paramedics. you were surprised to have even made it out alive, but you hoped to god that jay was also able to escape the inferno. when an arm reaches out to suddenly grab your wrist, your first reaction was to scream loudly. still suffering from the shock of what you just experienced.

“chill the fuck out, it’s just me y/n!” you instantly recognized jay’s voice, turning around to face him. you couldn’t believe it was really him, completely unscathed just like you. you immediately wrap your arms around him, holding him tighter than ever before. you’d be able to rest easy now knowing that you two were perfectly okay.

“i was looking for you, had me worried sick !” your eyes brimmed with tears again, but it was more so tears of happiness. you wouldn’t know what you’d do if you didn’t have your best friend with you anymore.

“i’m sorry… we should’ve stuck together. i didn’t mean to abandon you..” he didn’t sound like his usual self, this time he was more frantic, just as much in shock as you were.

“oh thank god you two are alright !” scar, the singer of that shitty band runs up to the both of you, “you guy’s should come back to my van, it’s safer there.” she proposes, helping you back up on your feet as you were too weak to do so on your own.

you shook your head at that idea. “no way, i’m getting out of here, come on jay!” you grab his hand but he doesn’t follow along.

“actually, i think i’m gonna go with them..” he says, letting go of your hand to head towards the van with the other girls.

“are you crazy ?!” you couldn’t believe he’d choose them over you, even if he was a huge fan, it still didn’t make sense for him to leave with them rather than his own damn best friend. you felt betrayed.

“look i’m in survival mode just as much as you right now, we gotta get going before anything else happens !” scarlett rushes to the driver’s side whilst the others hopped in the back along with jay, who seemed perfectly fine with getting in a vehicle with some random strangers he just met.

you’re steady calling after him but he doesn’t listen nor budge, simply watching as the van speeds off. knowing deep down in your gut that something awful was going to ensue…

๑ ๑ ๑

it’s been two painstakingly long hours and still no call or text from jay. the worry was only building up inside you. what if something bad really did happen ? what if he needed your help and you left him all alone to fend for himself ? the guilt was slowly starting to eat you up, consuming your already troubled mind. but then again, you thought you may be overthinking as you usually do. he was probably having the time of his life, probably even went to some after party with them. the betrayal of him leaving you still lingered in your thoughts. how could he have done this to you ? maybe he really was the selfish jerk that mark always painted him out to be. but maybe you were just as bad for letting him leave like that. you should’ve been more assertive, now you won’t be getting any sleep tonight until you know for sure that jay will be fine.

you decide to call mark, needing to get all of this off your chest before you drove yourself anymore mentally insane than you already are. he picked up on the last ring, assuming that he was most likely asleep by now.

“hello ?” the sound of his sleepy voice gave you a sense of comfort, which is exactly what you needed at this time.

“hey..” you spoke softly, unsure of what to even say right now. you didn’t want to say anything straight away, you had to lean in towards that kind of conversation first.

“how was the concert ?” he asks, yawning as he kept talking.

you paused for a second, knowing that you’ll worry him the minute you finally express what happened hours ago. “there was a fire...”

“what ?!” there was absolutely nothing that could’ve prepared him for that, now he’s the one in full-blown panic mode.

“yeah..” was all you said in return, still trying to wrap your head around everything. the mental image of all those people still trapped inside, unknowing of their indefinite fate will forever stick with you.

“holy fuck.. you’re okay, right ?!” you could hear his body shifting under the sheets as he fully woke up from hearing this tragic news. he would’ve never been able to forgive himself had you not survived, he’d spend all of eternity blaming himself for it.

“yeah.. i’m fine. there was a stampede, you could hear their bones breaking and people running out the building as they were still on fire.. i don’t even wanna know how many didn’t make it out..” you felt sick to your stomach, you should’ve done more to help but all you thought about was saving yourself, how selfish…

“fuck.. i’m so sorry you had to see that y/n, i’m just really glad that you were able to get out of there…”

“jay left with that band but i told him not to.. he hasn’t spoken to me since then and i’m really worried, we have to go save him !” you couldn’t shake this ominous feeling that something went horribly wrong, you had to trust your instincts on this one.

“who cares about jay ! people died !” mark was baffled by how you were still only thinking about him when the main person you should be worrying about is yourself.

he then proceeded to go on an endless tirade about how horrible of a friend jay is and that he knew he shouldn’t have let you go there with someone as untrustworthy as him. you just “okay” and “alright” your way out of everything he said, but you still had this deep inkling that you were right and you need to be there to rescue him. there was no real proof that he’d be in any danger, but something just seemed so off about that group as a whole..

that’s when you heard the sudden buzz of your doorbell, thinking it may just be your roommate who forgot her key, though it was quite late and you wouldn’t expect her to be coming back around at this time of night. you stilled in your bed, internally debating whether or not you should go down there to investigate; but you ultimately decide to do so anyway.

“shh, wait— mark i think i hear someone at the door...” you tell him as you hesitantly get up, putting on your bunny slippers and slipping on a robe before slowly creaking the door open.

“who is it?” he asks, just as confused as you were.

“i-i don’t know.. that’s what i’m trying to find out..” you whisper, heading into the hallway, producing quiet footsteps as you held onto the railing that lead downstairs.

the air around you felt suffocating, only met with a grim silence whilst putting one foot in front of the other. each step you took became increasingly more cautious, you had no idea why you were such a nervous wreck or why you thought there’d be an imminent threat lurking your way, but the way your heart was thudding rapidly out of your chest made your flight or fight senses fly off the radar.

finally making it to the door, you suck in a bated breath, swallowing the thick lump that sat in the back of your throat. your hands shakily curled around the shiny knob but the minute you open it you’re left feeling even more uneasy as there wasn’t anything nor anyone at your doorstep. just pitch black darkness greeting you, along with the chilling sound of trees rustling through the wind. a heavy, lingering fog accompanied the atmosphere, sending an uncomfortable shiver down your spine.

you were puzzled, feeling as though someone was playing a sick joke on you. you could’ve sworn you heard it, unless you really were going crazy after all. you knew that you were a little loose around the edges, but there’s no way that you could’ve made that up— it was far too realistic. soon as you were about to brush this whole thing off and chalk it up as just a freak accident, your ears detected faint shuffling, movement coming from a far distance. this time coming from inside the confines of your own home.

…what in the actual fuck is going on right now ?

“i just heard something from the kitchen..” you made sure to keep your voice low, mind and body riddled with the fear of the unknown as you clutched onto the phone harder than ever. you couldn’t see much of anything, but you followed whatever the hell was making all that commotion.

“don’t go near it ? what the fuck, that’s horror movie 101 knowledge. never go to the noise !” mark warns but you don’t take his advice, instead you slowly crept into the living room, remaining vigilant of every move you take.

the noise only grew louder and since you knew that your roommate wasn’t here, this only made your panic heighten, afraid that there may be a possible intruder. carefully stepping into the kitchen without making a sound, your hands scramble to find the switch, turning on the light to reveal the cause of your worry. the noise stopped the minute you were able to see again, and an instant sigh of relief leaves you once you notice it was just a leaky faucet, screwing the handle to shut it back in place. but that relief would soon deem itself short lived when you hear that same cacophony of sounds from earlier, again.

you spun around to see your fridge wide open, and someone actively rummaging through it. your body froze in place, simply unable to move no matter how hard you tried to relax your muscles. it was as if something were controlling you, telling you not to move an inch; like it was protecting you from whatever may be on the other side. scraps of food met the tiled floors, containers and cartons being tossed and thrown in a rampage. as the refrigerator finally came to a close, you were more than shocked to see that it was none other than jay, who’s covered in dried blood from head to toe.

“mark.. i’ll call you back i gotta go..” you muttered quickly to your boyfriend, feeling the need to tend to your friend who’s clearly not in the best of conditions right now.

“what?! no, don’t hang up y/n, please don-” you hang up on him before he could even finish. you were slowly able to regain your strength again, tiptoeing towards the boy who hasn’t even bothered to look up at you yet.

he looked more than unwell, as if he had just survived the most brutal attack of his life. his actions resembled nothing of a human, watching as he mindlessly consumed whatever he could find in his wake. he came across a pack of raw chicken that you’ve yet to open, savagely tearing through it, devouring the meat with his bare hands. you weren’t sure how to react to any of this, but you knew that he was exhibiting anything but normal behavior.

“what are you doing ?!” you finally broke the quietness that filled the room, but you were met with no response in return.

upon hearing your startled voice, he stopped eating and averts his gaze to you. his eyes were soulless, no emotion throughout him whatsoever, looking at you as if he’s never seen you before. instead of getting up he crawls over to you, still refusing to utter a single word. your lips part to speak again but you notice a shift in his odd aura, he began coughing in the most grotesque way possible, as if he were trying to get something to leave out of his body. that’s when he starts to profusely vomit, everywhere. it wasn’t just any normal vomit though, it was a black, spiny fluid, spread all over the tiles and even spilling onto your clothes.

“jay what the hell’s wrong with you ?!” you yell at him but it was no use. he was never going to answer you, it was like he was possessed by some kind of spirit.

he finally got up on his feet, never breaking eye contact with you, his dark pupils pierced through you like the sharp edge of a butcher knife. jay could smell the fear you emitted, it only made him want to gravitate towards you more. the only sane option that ran through your mind was to call the police, taking several steps backward from his presence, but of course he doesn’t let you do that. he only moves faster, pushing you up against the wall with superhuman aggression. he grabs ahold of your wrist tightly, forcing you to drop your phone, a loud thud produced as it made contact with the ground. he remained silent throughout the whole ordeal, flashing you an eerie smile, only a hairs breadth away from meeting your plush lips.

you whimpered in fear, but he keeps shushing you, petting the crown of your head like you were a crying, wounded animal in need. “are you scared?” he whispers into you ear, already knowing the answer to that. he only continues to taunt you, licking a long, slow paced stripe along the base of your neck, coating his saliva onto your soft, shivering skin.

he wouldn’t go any further than that, simply letting go of you and backing away as if he just now was able to acknowledge what he’s done. his breathing grew heavier, unable to even look at you, it felt as though he couldn’t control his own body anymore. before you could do anything, he swiftly heads out of the back door, leaving without a trace.

“jay !” you try to call after him, but to no avail, you were left all alone, traumatized for the second time of the night.

you’ve went through the five stages of grief all in under a minute, unsure of what to even do in this moment. you’re standing here, confused, overwhelmed, and mortified— but now there’s black vomit all over your kitchen floor and on yourself. you weeped again, hopelessly trying to piece together the fragments of what the fuck just happened moments ago.

๑ ๑ ๑

the next day everyone’s talking about the fire at school. many were mourning the losses of their precious loved ones, sobbing uncontrollably from the horrific events that occurred from the night before. you sat in physics class with jay, who acted as if nothing even happened last night, carrying on as he normally did. your professor mr. choi, took a moment to speak about what happened, mentioning the saddening news that took place not even 24 hours ago. what was even more odd was that jay was smirking the entire time, attempting to hold in his laughter as he heard the professor speak, you hit his arm in response of his apathy.

“this isn’t funny..” you scold him for being so insensitive, “people died, jay ! it’s all over the news, we even made it internationally…”

he rolls his eyes, “yeah, so? people die everyday y/n, they’re not special. i’ll give it a week max and i bet you no one will be talking about it anymore.”

how could he even say something like that ? especially knowing that he knew some of the people who passed away, your beloved peers who fought for their lives at the very last seconds of being alive. it was more than insensitive, it was just plain cruel.

“what’s wrong with you ?!” you looked at him as if he’s gone mad, which he quite literally has considering what took place at your apartment last night. you haven’t mentioned it to him yet but you were reluctant on doing so, he’d probably deny everything anyway.

“what’s wrong with you ?? god.. did someone piss in your cereal this morning?” he wasn’t even remotely phased by anything you were saying, if anything, he saw it as one big mockery.

you scoff in response, mumbling something under your breath as you listen to the professor continue on with his speech. you always knew jay was the type to never wear his emotions on his sleeve, but it really rubbed you the wrong way at how he didn’t seem to shed an ounce of care about any of the people who lost their lives so abruptly.

“stop talking to yourself, makes you look even more like a weirdo,” jay quickly comments, he was irritating you the more he kept talking. if you weren’t in this classroom right now, you’d be cursing him out and giving him hell to pay— but you simply kept your mouth shut for the time being. there’s a time and place for certain things..

your melancholy only worsened as the day went by, feeling this heavy, cinder block weight of depression carried on your shoulders. the more you thought of it, the more shitty you felt. anyone would have survivor’s guilt after what you’d gone through, but it only multiplied as it fully settled in, you felt guilty for even doing something as minuscule as breathing. you truly believed that you didn’t deserve to survive, that it should’ve be you in place of someone else… why didn’t you help anyone ?

once class was dismissed, you hurried up out of your seat to go meet up with your boyfriend. jay followed behind you like a lapdog of course, but you didn’t want to speak to him. you debated on confronting him about yesterday, though you decided not to as you weren’t even sure where to begin.. you’d like to think that this was all just some intense fever dream you had but you know it wasn’t.

you physically remember being there, in your kitchen, sobbing to yourself while cleaning up the mess that jay left. you couldn’t go back to sleep after that, not after the way he looked at you like that. vividly picturing the devil’s carved grin plastered on his face, like he was going to rip your heart out of your small body and eat you alive. if you’re being completely honest, you were more fearful of your own life in that moment than you were at the bar.

even if you did tell him what happened, there’s a slim chance he’d take any responsibility for his own actions. his pride would never let him. you remember when you were kids he’d always make you get into so much trouble with him, but the minute you two got caught he’d simply deny everything and pin it all on you. jay was always able to manipulate his way out of just about anything— sociopaths are quite charismatic. you’d often joke with him that he was one, to which he’d never deny or confirm. deep down you’d hope that your own best friend wasn’t, but those old memories gave you all the same reminiscing feelings you felt years ago. or maybe, you were just as demented as he is.. birds of a feather flock together, right ?

๑ ๑ ๑

jay would only become increasingly possessive as time went on. he’s always exhibited quite clingy behaviors but things only snowballed from the night at the bar and onwards. he’d constantly be blowing up your phone, texting you the weirdest, most cryptic shit at 4 in the morning; or if you didn’t respond fast enough for his liking, he’d call you over twenty times until you finally answered, not caring at all if you were with mark. he only made you feel more guilty if you expressed needing space, simply threatening to harm himself or make it seem as if it’d be your fault if something bad were to happen and you didn’t pick up the phone. you don’t know what’s gotten into him lately, but he surely hasn’t been acting like himself ever since he interacted with that band.

a month has flown by and you notice jay was starting to look paler than a ghost, the dark circles under his eyes made it seem as though he hasn’t gotten a wink of sleep in months. he looked like death. as if his own flesh was eating him from the inside out. you thought maybe it could be due to stress of some kind, but it wasn’t humanly possible for him to change this drastically. he resembled nothing short of a sickly patient lying on their deathbed, awaiting the grim reaper to come knocking at their doorstep at any minute. he lost a lot of muscle mass as well, turning into a weaker, much more frail version of himself. it truly pained you to see him in such a state, how sunken in his face was, gaunt like a skeleton. an unbearable sight indeed..

“you look like shit..” you tried to say it the nicest way possible but there was no other way to express your concerns, “you okay.. ?”

“gee thanks, and yeah, never been better actually.” jay replied, his tone laced with the utmost sarcasm.

obviously you don’t take his word for it. you know there’s something deeper going on but you didn’t impose any further. you didn’t want him to get upset or agitated with anymore of your prying, so you let it go for now.

the distressing environment around campus only thickens when a brutal murder was reported a few weeks ago. the sight of a decomposing body was found in the middle of the woods, right behind the football field. one of the professors discovered it as they took a walk along the trail— later identified to be soojin, the pretty little captain of the cheer team. her organs were scattered all over the perimeters, painting the greenery with a bold, crimson hue. some parts of her corpse weren’t able to be located, as most of her disemboweled body was eaten by the hungry animals, feasting on her rotting flesh like they just scored a full course meal.

this only caused an uproar of mass hysteria throughout the school, leaving everyone to believe that there may be something even more sinister going on. a vigil was held for her just as there was for the other victims who died in the fire; friends, family, and other town folk gathered around in memory of her. a police investigation was launched shortly after, but there haven’t been many updates on the case so far as no foul play was detected. the authorities simply assumed it to be an animal attack— albeit one of the most gruesome and barbaric attacks they’ve ever seen in their careers.

when you spoke to jay about it one night, you discussed all possible theories you’ve been brainstorming in your head. you believed it very well could’ve been an animal that did it, possibly a wild bear that just enjoys munching on humans for dinner— but he told you that was far from likely. however, you thought maybe he was only saying that just to instill more fear in you, which secretly worked.

you didn’t completely dismiss the possibility of it being some bloodthirsty animal.. she was torn limb from limb with absolutely no sign of weapons being used, so the likeliness of a regular person being able to do something of that caliber with their own bare hands made it almost slim to none. you truly thought her death was one of the saddest ways to go out.. you never spoke to soojin a day in your life but she was pretty popular and fairly well liked amongst everyone, you’d never guess her of all people would end up with a fate like this.

as you trudged through the halls, you bumped into one of your classmates ryujin, who’s been asking nonstop if you could set her up with jay. you’ve known for a while that she’s always had a thing for him and was hoping you could play cupid and be the middle man for her. you’d been putting it off for a while since you highly doubted that he’d reciprocate those same feelings, but being the good sport you are, you end up telling her that you’ll talk to jay, although you couldn’t make any promises.

upon meeting up with jay later on in the day, you proposed the idea to him, but of course, he declined almost straight away saying he wasn’t interested. he referred to her as that ‘weird, stoner goth chick who tries too hard’ and wouldn’t touch her with a ten foot pole. you definitely expected him to be adverse to your idea, but maybe not to this extent. you just wanted to see your friend happy but of course jay always has to ruin it…

however, not even an hour later, he ends up agreeing to it, as if a switch had flipped in his brain. you thought it was a bit strange how he’d simply gone from one extreme to the next but you didn’t question it as you had no reason to. ultimately, you were just happy for ryujin, at least she’d get to spend some alone time with her crush.

you on the other hand, had a multitude of worries of your own. you and mark were supposed to go see the new twilight movie in theaters, just to get your mind off everything— yet what you felt most anxious about was what’ll occur afterwards. you were planning on losing your virginity tonight, feeling as though you were ready to take the next step with him. well, at least you thought so.. but now you weren’t even feeling sure of that anymore. a part of you felt pressured to just lose it already and since you were dating mark, you may as well do it, right ? if only it were that simple..

๑ ๑ ๑

your nerves were at an all time high as you laid beneath his bare form. inhaling, exhaling, and repeating those same steps over and over. your mind was racing a million miles per minute, staring up at the ceiling as you rethink all of your life decisions.

everything seemed fine at first, until it wasn’t..

you couldn’t seem to put your finger on it, but all you knew was that this felt strange.. something doesn’t feel right.. all you could do was lay there, utterly detached from reality.

numbness.. that’s all you felt..

you wanted to crawl into your own skin and die, you shouldn’t be so repulsed by your own boyfriend being on top of you— but that was the only emotion you bore.

everything felt so foreign to you, his touch, the way he caressed you, it didn’t feel right. you couldn’t shake this odd sensation, it was something you didn’t want for yourself. you wanted to puke, absolutely sick to your stomach.

he kissed your neck, but you don’t feel a thing. completely stoic and emotionless. all you’re thinking about right now is jay. you had this inclination that something went terribly wrong and you needed an escape.

“i-i can’t do this.. i’m sorry..” you finally say out loud, quickly pushing him off of you before anything else could continue.

“did i do something wrong ?” mark asks, confused by your sudden coldness.

you simply don’t answer, scrambling to put on your clothes and leaving his house in a hurry to go and run to your car. you began driving in the direction of jay’s dorm, not knowing whether he’d be there or not. the limited amount of streetlights made it even more difficult to see, but you spot a shadowy figure heading towards you on the main road.

in a rush of panic you slammed onto the brakes hard, trying not to run over whatever’s coming towards the vehicle, thinking it was probably a deer or something—but you see that it’s jay, his clothes stained in blood just like night he was in your kitchen. you immediately got out of the car to go help him but he was no longer there anymore, as if he’s vanished into thin air.

confusion doesn’t even begin to describe what you were feeling.. reluctantly heading back home, hoping that it was all some vivid hallucination that you were having— but the minute you went upstairs into your room, you see jay sitting on your bed, not a single drop of blood detected anywhere on him anymore.

“what are you doing here ?” you ask, blankly staring down at him over the rim of your glasses.

“just wanted to drop by and see my favorite girl.” he smiles crookedly, looking much healthier than he did when you saw him earlier, “what’s wrong with that, hm?”

“why’re you in my bed ? just go back to your dorm jay.” you didn’t have time for his little games right now, you just wanted to shut the whole world out.

“but i wanna stay… plus we always used to sleep together when we had sleep overs.” he pouts, proceeding to get even more comfortable as he had no plans on leaving anytime soon.

“is that my grateful dead t-shirt?” you get a bit closer to examine, growing irritated that he went through your stuff without even asking.

he doesn’t respond, at least not in the way you think he would. instead, jay harshly pressed his lips against yours. stretching the neckline of your shirt to pull all your weight on top of his. he managed to have some self control at first, but that didn’t last too long as he savored the taste of you. hesitantly, you kissed him back, whimpering at the feel of his tongue prodding at your lips, begging for entry. your mouth slightly parts, giving him just enough leeway for him to devour you in the sloppiest, most depraved way possible. he kissed you hard, hard enough to knock the wind out of you. nothing but raw passion and burning desire throughout.

his lips moved in perfect harmony with yours, tangling your hands into his messy, raven locks. jay would only grow more unhinged, never letting you gasp for air for more than half a second. he explored the depths of you, every nook and cranny, like he wanted you down to the marrow, swallowing you whole. he felt this primal urge in wanting to bite you, to sign your death with his teeth— but he resisted, at least not yet anyway.

when his hands came up to find your hips, his touch felt scorching hot against your skin… lifting your skirt up inch by inch. then the realization of what you’re doing finally hits, that you have a goddamn boyfriend and this isn’t something you should ever be doing with your best friend. quickly getting off of him, shouting in protest.

“jay, what the fuck ?!” you were horrified, not even wanting to look at him anymore.

“language y/n !” he giggles at your filthy vocabulary, licking his lips to capture your taste once more, “don’t act like you weren’t enjoying it either.”

“but i’ll admit, the reason i’m here exactly is.. i have a confession to make..” he takes a dramatic pause before continuing, “i haven’t been completely honest with you, and you’re the only one i can trust.”

you look at him strangely, unsure of what he fully meant by that, “what is it..”

“i’m dead.”

now you’re staring at him as if he just said the most absurd shit you ever heard, which quite literally it was.

“huh ? what do you mean you’re dead?”

“what do you not understand y/n, it’s pretty self explanatory.” he casually says if he were simply talking about the weather.

“i’m not sure i follow..” you didn’t get where he was heading with any of this, hoping that it’s just some joke with a bad punchline.

“it means i’m dead— as in not alive.” he repeats nonchalantly.

“jay, shut up. you’re not funny.” crossing your arms in annoyance, growing more impatient with him by the second.

“it’s true, i swear !”

“you’re ridiculous..” you’ve had enough of his little shenanigans, ready to walk away from him but he grabs you at the last minute, forcibly bringing you back to meet his gaze.

“just listen, it’ll all make sense soon,” he pleads, flashing you a sweet, puppy eyed look that could make anyone fold almost instantly.

“‘kay.. fine whatever.” you heave a sigh, sitting back down on your bed, still a bit reluctant on hearing him out.

“there’s something inside me… an evil entity,” he explains further, “ever since that night at the bar my body feels.. different.” he proceeds to tell you this dumb story that you weren’t buying for a second.

“c’mon, you really expect to believe tha-”

he cuts you off, proceeding to go on a whole tangent, “remember that band i told you about ? they drove me out to the creek, dragged me out of the van and offered me as a virgin sacrifice in exchange for fame and fortune. they kept telling me how hard it was to make it as an indie band so this was the only option they had left.. all i can remember afterwards was how much pain i was in… they each took turns stabbing me to death, singing some creepy chant as they did it, then they lit me on fire.. but the problem is that i’m not a virgin, so when scar and her little gang murdered me the ritual backfired and a demonic spirit took over my body. i was able to escape the forest but i left feeling so hungry.. so on my way back home, i saw some girl on the opposite side of the pavement, she looked quite edible so i ate her. and that’s how i started eating human flesh.”

you had no words. your only reaction was to blink rapidly at everything he just told you. there’s no way he could be telling you the truth, stuff like that only happens in movies, pure fiction. “that’s the craziest fucking story you’ve ever made up in your entire life jay.”

he seemingly grows frustrated at the fact you aren’t taking his words seriously, but he kept on talking anyway. “i’m being serious y/n, you’ve gotta believe me ! they’re basically agents of satan, they simply used me as a pawn. i was their gateway to the lifestyle they so desperately wanted to achieve..”

“so what you’re saying is that you’ve been reincarnated as a demonic spirit that feeds off of human flesh ? that’s what you’re trying to get at ??” you ask, confirming his very weird, but oddly specific narrative.

jay nods, “yes, that’s precisely what i’m trying to say.”

“so.. you’re telling me you’re the one who killed soojin ?” you question outrightly, hoping at the very least he had nothing to do with it, but if what he is saying was true that could very well be a possibility.

he nods again, “yep. and ryujin.”

your blood ran cold the minute upon hearing that, eyes almost bulging out of their sockets, “wait- what ?!”

“yeah, i only agreed to meet up with her just to eat her. so it’s practically your fault that she’s dead.” he shrugs, seeing it as if it was no big deal.

you couldn’t comprehend a single thing your ears were hearing right now.. your own classmate was dead and gone because of your best friend.

“you’re a fucking monster.. she had a whole life ahead of her. hopes and dreams just like the rest of us..”

“well, now she’s food for worms, sucks to suck,” jay shrugs again, speaking so nonchalant about everything it made you want to scream at the top of your lungs.

disgusted didn’t even amount up to what you felt, sitting there in silence trying to process all of this.

“anyway, wanna see something cool?” he asks, not even bothering to await your response as you gave him the most questionable look of all mankind.

“i can withstand any injury without pain and i’m difficult to kill, see.” he takes one of your gel pens from your nightstand and stabs it straight into his own wrist, he was bleeding heavily at first but then the wounds start to close up within a few seconds, eventually fading away as if he didn’t just stab himself at all.

“see ! how cool is that ?? like some x-men type shit,” he says like a giddy school kid, bragging over his new abilities. “when i’m full, i’m practically invincible. i’m a fucking god.”

again, you were too stunned to speak. you genuinely thought you were losing your mind at this point, there’s no way any of this is real. it’s all a bad dream. you just need to pinch yourself and you’ll wake up, right ..?

“oh by the way, that night i snuck into your place, i was having all sorts of thoughts.. even thought about hurting you but i could never do that..” he finally admits to the night when he went into your kitchen, “i was just so hungry but nothing would satisfy my craving..” his eyes were a window to the truth, and by the looks of how empty they were, it was safe to assume you still had every right to frightened.

“jay, i- i really think you should leave…” your whole body was practically shaking, you couldn’t bear to look but you were far more terrified of looking away— falling apart at the seams.

he doesn’t even budge a little upon hearing you, “oh c’monn y/n, let me stay the night; we can play boyfriend and girlfriend like we used to… good times am i right ?” he strokes your hand with his, not even fully understanding the gravity of what he’s done or said this whole time.

“jay you’re freaking me the fuck out !” you raise your voice louder, removing yourself away from his touch. how could you let a literal murderer touch you ?

“there’s no need for you to be. i already told you that i’m not gonna hurt you.. at least not in that way..” jay clung onto you again, this time dragging you back down onto the bed as he forced himself on top of you.

you scrunch your eyes shut at the feel of his hands on you, idle fingers sneaking under the hem of your top. a surge of heat flushes down your thighs, blood rushing to your cheeks... and to your core. god, you were so embarrassed right now.

“w-what are you doing …?” you breathe out, opening your eyes once again, only to see him staring straight into your soul.

“don’t get all shy on me now.. we’re just havin’ a bit of fun,” he answers, “just messing around like the old days, right ?” he slid his index finger under the band of your skirt, pulling you closer to him, his lips only centimeters away from yours.

“jay no, please-” you begin, but don’t have the time to finish your sentence.

“shh, it’s okay, i’ll take the lead. we can go slow… i promise i won’t bite. unless you want me to.” he darkly chuckles, tilting his head to the side, pressing a light kiss to your lips. surprisingly, you reciprocate it. he pulls his hand away from your skirt, enveloping it around your throat, not putting too much pressure around it just yet. “see, i knew you’d be into it, you’re my little freak, aren’t you ?”

you hated that you were getting aroused from this, the way he spoke to you in that husky tone. that same bubbling heat rushing to your core again.. you wanted to fight it, you truly did, but you couldn’t. your mind was telling you one thing but your body was reacting differently, as if you were under some spell that he casted.

you don’t know what to answer to that. is there even anything you can even say back to him ? you couldn’t speak even if you wanted to. and besides, what’s the point of lying when he has you trapped between his large body and your mattress, his fingers gripping your neck, his lips brushing over your face, would you really be lying if you said you weren’t enjoying this ? he practically knows you better than your own self at times, of course he’d be able to tell…

he kisses you again, but this time much hungrier, his tongue dominating yours easily. he nudges your legs open with his knee, his other hand swiftly diving under the hem of your skirt, groping your soft flesh in a lewd way that keeps you out of breath— apart from the fact that his tongue is currently exploring your mouth.

he grazes the bump of your pussy covered by your lace panties with his fingers, making your knees buckle at the unexpected contact. you wanted to close your legs shut, but when he slowly rubs the pad of his middle finger over your clit, a desperate whine escapes your throat, muffled by his mouth on yours. the moment only brief until he dips his hand into your underwear.

you try to make him stop by grabbing ahold of his wrist, pulling away from his lips to pathetically whisper a ‘p-please’ that only makes him chuckle in response.

“mm.. already begging for me, sweetheart ?” he softly laughs, smirking at you. “excited by the idea of my fingers in your little cunt instead of your boyfriend’s ? hm ?”

you frown because that wasn’t the reason why you begged him, but now that he said this... your thoughts are going into a completely different direction. what the hell’s wrong with you ?

“you wanna know how it feels, baby? what it’s like to have your pussy stuffed by someone else’s fingers…” his dirty talk only continues, you couldn’t fathom this was really jay speaking to you in such a vulgar manner like this. your best friend who’s about to take your virginity whether you wanted it to happen or not, he was going to make sure that mark could never have you in such a way, wanted to ruin it for everyone else like he always does.

he’s not waiting for a response as he starts stroking your bundle of nerves in slow circular motions, applying some pressure to really make you feel it. you let out another whine, this time of genuine pleasure.

jay then shifts down to your entrance, circling it with a lot of delicacy, but this gentleness of his doesn’t go on for too long as he pushes a finger into you without warning. you bit down on your bottom lip harshly— the size of his fingers in no comparison to yours. your eyes swelled with water, faint little cries escaping your mouth when he adds a second digit.

“i know, i know,” he whispers, “must be uncomfortable, hm?” you nod your head, confirming his words. “it’ll feel good soon, i promise. you’re probably only used to the feel of your tiny fingers, it’s normal…”

when he says this, you have a hard time believing him. how could it feel good when you weren’t at all prepared for this— when it’s not what you wanted..

he begins moving his fingers in and out of you, slow and long strokes at first, circling your clit with his thumb at the same time. he’d curls his fingers every so often, making a little hook shape, patting your sweet spot. the intrusion was uncomfortable, but it progressively gets so much more pleasurable as he thrusts into you at a regular pace.

tears continued to flow, falling down to your cheeks, lashes all wet and sticky, but they weren’t the result of your pain…

“god.. look at you. so pretty when you cry,” jay murmurs beside your ear, butterflies swirling in your stomach when he tells you this.

he unwraps his hand from your throat to instead grab your thigh, placing your leg around his shoulder. you now feel his fingers way deeper inside of you, gently and deliciously stimulating your g spot. you dare to look down where his left hand is operating between your thighs, sliding in until he’s knuckles deep into your pussy. this makes you breathless, head rolling back onto your pillows, having never experienced anything like this before.

“o-oh my god-!” you exclaim when jay’s ministrations bring you so close to your orgasm. your legs couldn’t stop twitching, your body warning you of your approaching high.

you’d probably be more aware of how hard he was if it weren’t trapped in his loosely fitting jeans, but you literally cannot focus on anything else other than jay fingering you, hitting your sensitive spots each time he thrusts in.

“that’s it, baby,” he coaxes, moving faster. “you feel it ? huh?” he asks and you’re able to croak out a weak ‘yes’. “tell me how it feels.”

you hate his questions— you hate them so damn much. he knows how you feel, but he wants you to say it, he wants you to say that you enjoy it, and… your body really does.

“g-good.”

“yeah?” he breathes out, fucking your cunt with his fingers, enthralled by the little moans and whimpers you let out.

“yes,” you confirm, closing your eyes and slowly nodding your head. “fuck !” you curse out when you finally reach your high, nails digging into his forearm as you ride out your orgasm, your entire body violently shaking.

jay helps you by slowly rubbing your puffy dewy clit in circles, telling you more dirty words in your ear, all while said in the sweetest tone, as if what he’s doing can be described as anything sweet.

“good girl,” he praises, “see, i told you it’d feel great.”

he still has his head in the crook of your neck, and you frown at the feeling of sharp teeth against your skin. it’s barely there, just brushing over it, as if hesitating to act… but jay retrieves back, looking into your reddened eyes.

he could simply stop there, but he won’t— not until he fully got what he wanted, he needs more…

he pulls his hand out of your panties, fingers glistening with your arousal. “open wide for me, baby,” he instructs.

you glance at his hand, a little repulsed. you’ve never thought about tasting yourself and it’s surely nothing you’d have ever done… if not for him.

you then reluctantly open your mouth and he enters his wet fingers in.

“suck,” he adds on, expecting you to blindly follow all of his orders, and you do so without a second thought.

he stares down at you while you lick his fingers clean and he slides them a bit deeper, pushing down on your tongue. the taste of yourself isn’t what you thought it’d be… it doesn’t taste like much of anything, in fact.

he removes his fingers from your mouth only to put them in his own after. “just as sweet as you are,” he grins. “stand up for me, wan’ you to suck me off.”

your wobbly legs do their best at balancing themselves, slowly getting up only to be told to get back down on your knees. you sink down to the ground, leaning over to eye his stiff erection through his pants, slowly rubbing your hand over it as you palm him in your grasp. he hisses at the feel, already loving how you obediently take orders, how you’ve become nothing but a mindless slut for him.

you didn’t know the first thing you were doing but you did what felt natural, so you free his cock from the confines of his pants and underwear, watching as it sprung out and slapped against his stomach. jay was huge. his veiny, pink dick standing tall in front of you, gulping as you debate on how you’re going to take all of him in your tiny mouth.

his length throbbed in your small hand, tip already leaking out a pearly bead of precum, dribbling onto your fingers. you slowly press your mouth against the tip, keeping it there for a bit to get a little taste of him and to get used to the feel. then you swirled your tongue lightly around it, loving the salty tanginess of his precum against your tongue.

“fuck… feel so good around me already,” he bit his lip harshly, gripping the sheets as he groans with pleasure.

you wrap your mouth tighter around his length as you begin to slide your head down. bobbing it back and forth, keeping a tight suction on his cock, making sure not to use any teeth. you feel jay’s hips jolt up from the feel as you drew more saliva from your mouth, making a mess all over yourself.

he let out a low moan when his length hits the back of your throat, accidentally gagging at how much you took. you couldn’t take all of him in your mouth completely, but you did the best with what you could, bobbing your head as your hand stroked the rest. the way you looked while taking him made him want to bust at the very sight, nothing could compare to having your mouth around him.

“atta girl, keep going— just like that baby— ahh….” he keeps encouraging you, giving you small praises here and there. he does his best not to keep his eyes off you but he wanted to shut his eyes from how good you were making him feel, you were such a natural at this. as you continued stroking his cock with your pretty, talented mouth, he elicits more moans and it only makes you want to make him cum faster.

jay bit his lip even harder, trying so hard not to close his eyes, taking in shallow breaths. he could feel himself getting closer and his whole body tenses up like he’s got a volcano erupting inside him.

“shit— think ‘m gonna come… damn baby…”

you couldn’t say anything since his cock was buried deep down your throat. the only thing on your mind right now was getting him to finish inside your mouth. you lightly hum as you pick up your pace, he matches your movements with his hips, fucking your mouth aggressively. there was saliva everywhere, your face was flushed and you seriously looked such a mess. a beautiful mess, all for jay.

you feel his thickness throbbing in your mouth and a warm sensation hits the back of your throat. white ropes of his cum releases into you and you swallow it immediately, to which you earn yourself a “good girl” as you look up at him, drinking up all his cum. surprisingly, he tasted pretty good, emptying every last drop of him, once you finally pulled away he orders for you to get back on the bed and to bend over for him. you only hesitated for a second, looking at him credulously before doing what he asked of you, trembling legs meeting with the soft sheets again.

“are you…?” you say under your breath, peering over your shoulder to see jay stroking himself, looking at your glistening pussy that’s spread on perfect display for him.

“gonna put my cock inside you ?” he finishes your question for you. “yeah, i am.”

you stop breathing at his answer, sensing his deft fingers touching your thighs and hips, going under your skirt to drag your panties down. he pumps himself a couple more times before aligning his head with your dripping wet entrance. his free hand keeping your skirt crumpled up over your ass, laying the other one on your hip.

“careful, sweetheart,” he says softly beside your ear, “this might sting a little bit more than two fingers.” he swipes the head of his cock through your sticky folds and all you can do is moan pathetically at the feeling, lewd, wet noises echoing throughout the room.

you can’t see his length even with the way you contort your head to look over your shoulder, but you’re still able to see his chest and hips moving as he pushes his cock into your pussy. the burning sensation of your cunt getting stretched out was enough to make you see stars, and he was right. this hurts way more than his fingers, the two feelings were not comparable at all.

“jay-,” you cry out, holding onto the sheets below you for dear life until there’s no more blood circulating in your knuckles.

he hears you, loving the sounds you’re making because of him and the way you say his name with eyes full of tears. when he bottoms out inside of you, his pelvis flushed against your ass, he lets out a low grunt and throws his head back, closing his eyes to savour the pleasure entirely.

you bit onto your lip, compressing a moan that dared to slip from your mouth again. he deliberately pounded into you, like he wanted everyone near to know just how badly he was ruining you, wanting you to beg and cry out for mercy, like he wanted every bone in your body to bend and break.

you involuntarily clench around him, making him tighten his grip on your hip. he thrusts himself deeper into you, his cock sliding in and out of your pussy at an agonizingly harsh pace. each time he bottoms out, jay makes sure the skin of his thighs slap against your ass, the sounds almost as loud as your little moans and whimpers.

your wetness allows him to fuck his cock into your pussy back and forth, welcoming him so perfectly without any restriction. it’s almost impossible for him to not hit your sweet spot, and he reaches so much deeper when he lifts up your thigh with the hand that was previously placed on your hip.

you don’t know how long you can stay in this position for, especially when jay’s drilling his hard cock into you like nothing else matters. it’s like he needs it from you, and as the pleasure only builds up in you, you start thinking you need it desperately, too.

you’re breathing heavily, and so is he, feeling his hot breath fanning against your neck when he tilts his head down closer to yours. you can clearly hear his breathing now as well as his deep grunts that leave his mouth every time your gummy walls close tightly around his girth, literally sucking him right in.

“shit,” he curses out as he pushes lightly on your back, deepening the arch of it so your ass is flushed against his pelvis.

he kisses your neck pretty messily, but it only raises the temperature of your body, your skin boiling hot under his soft lips. he leaves a wet trail behind, going up to your ear, down to your shoulder. telling him to stop isn’t even possible anymore, it wouldn’t make any sense… would be absolutely stupid when you’re so close to your second orgasm. as he thrusts into you, his balls smack your pussy, and the sounds are just too vulgar, but it’s honestly arousing you so much. jay lets go of your thigh to take a hold of your jaw, turning it around so he can look at your face.

your mouth gaped to let out big puffs of air, and it’s the same for him, his breathing being irregular and heavy. he didn’t think he would ever need something that badly, which is making you his, surprisingly enough. making you his in whatever way possible; whether it’s by fucking you to death or eating you— or both. jay doesn’t care, he just wants it. it doesn’t take long for your second orgasm to pass through you, arms and legs shaking as the knot at the pit of your stomach snaps. jay feels it very clearly, your walls hugging his cock terribly tightly, bringing him closer to his own orgasm as well.

“please.. jay, so good..”

“gonna come in this tight little virgin pussy.” he captured your waist pulling you closer into him. “wanna put a baby in you, bet you’d like that, huh ?”

“holy fuck,” he hisses, his hip thrusts accelerating, literally burying his cock in your cunt until strings of white paints your insides. “oh, god…”

he stays in this position for a couple of seconds, catching his breath. he then slightly backs away, making sure to keep your skirt crumpled up over your butt, looking at the mess he made of you.

but he wasn’t done just yet, he wanted you to be completely, utterly, and thoroughly ruined by all parts of him. his fingers, his cock, and now his tongue.

“just need another taste..” jay couldn’t get enough of you, practically blinded by lust, all he wants is to have you, only you, no one else was more perfect than you.

he bends down, toying with your clit and licking your opening until you turned into a yelping mess underneath his tongue, tugging onto the sheets, pillows, whatever you could grasp, feeling like you were about to die. he had a strong grip on your thighs, kept you in place while you came on his tongue like you were made for it, so pretty and ashamed that he’s lost all self-restraint, if ever had any to begin with.

he continued to lap at your cunt, kissing and sucking at your clit, moaning into your heat. hands caressing your thighs, fingernails piercing, spreading you open wider for him. you grind against his face and jay couldn’t help but groan at the way you were so enthralled by the feel. his tongue never letting up against your clit, following your cunt with every movement you make, not letting you catch a break from the feeling of him against you.

his mouth domes around your clit, sucking you right in, teeth lightly grazing against your bud, momentarily making your back arch. mid arch, jay slips two fingers into you. the slight sting makes you hiss as he stretches you out again, long digits buried to the knuckles inside of you upon initial thrust. he soon plants open mouthed kisses against your cunt, fingers working their way in and out of you at an obnoxious pace, curling naturally.

the combination of jay’s tongue and fingers, along with his lips planting kisses against your cunt in between sloppy licks, is all too overwhelming. you couldn’t stop clenching around his fingers, pulling them in to beg for more, to which he gladly gives. fingers fucking into you faster, much deeper than ever before. the feeling of your impeding orgasm has you shaking, practically vibrating, unable to brace yourself for it.

tears pooling down the side of your face as you moan out for him. the tips of his fingers repeatedly hit the soft, gushy spot deep inside of you, biting his lip as he watches you come undone for him all over again. his thumb massaged your clit, slowly but surely dragging you further off the edge. you felt yourself relax into his touch, into the feeling of lust and desire fully engulfing your soul. that’s when it takes over… your vision blurs, almost going black, mouth agape as you let out broken moans. it’s all too much for you to handle, but you never want it to end..

your chest is getting hot and heavy, tightening as you cum, releasing all stress and tension, absolutely melting into this state that makes you feel like you’re floating. your body was on cloud nine as your cunt spills all over his fingers, wetness squirting all over jay’s forearm and thighs.

“jay…” you said his name on repeat, so low and barely audible, mind all foggy and hazy, as if he’d hypnotized you and the only word you can say was his name.

๑ ๑ ๑

a modus operandi. every killer has one, don’t they ?

some tend to prey on the young, weak, and most vulnerable. some may even go so far as devising a foolproof scenario that’ll get others to feel sorry for them, only to lure them right into their devious traps.

jay was no exception to this rule. he knew exactly how to use his good looks and charisma to get anyone to fall for his tricks. he didn’t need to put in too much effort, he didn’t have to seek anyone out because they’d come to him anyway. and no one knew a goddamn thing besides you. which only made you want to scream internally. only you knew the real truth.

ryujin’s death was the next topic of discussion for this whole week as more terror spewed upon the town. no one saw it coming, she was the last person anyone would think could be a target. gossip spread around quickly, revealing more details about the scene of the crime.

some of her internal organs were missing and was cannibalized just like soojin was. her body was so badly mutilated the authorities couldn’t even identify her at first. many were now believing it to be an act of some kind of satanic cult as there was a gigantic pentagram smeared in blood on her bedroom mirror. some were even saying that she looked like ‘lasagna with teeth’, to which you shuddered at that mental image being planted in your mind.

there was a campus curfew set in place to ensure the safety and wellbeing of the rest of the students. everyone’s worried they’ll be next, and since the killer hasn’t been caught this only made the entire town as a whole become on edge. the streets were barren, no sign of any activity past nine o’clock. no one felt safe, it was as if everything was on lockdown now. many were concerned that the upcoming spring formal would get canceled, but it’s been confirmed that it’ll still be held, although the times were changed from 7-10 PM to 6-8 PM to follow the curfew’s ‘no one out past nine o’clock rule’.

while studying in the library, you decided to do some of your own research about jay’s strange condition, reading as many occult books as you could find. you later discovered that he’s an incubus; a male demon that has sexual activity with other women. he was at his weakest state whenever he’s hungry, needing to feed on human flesh in order to sustain his lifespan and overall appearance. you never believed in the supernatural before all of this, but now that you’ve seen it with your own two eyes, you don’t think you’ll be able to live a normal life again.

“this can’t be real… there’s no way any of this is a coincidence, first the fire now a cannibal psycho’s on the loose?” mark rants about the recent murders as you sat on the swings at the park together. you were jealous of how blissfully ignorant he was, how he had no idea how much deeper this all ran.

“i know… it seems like we can’t catch a break, now the whole words got a raging tragedy boner for us..” you sigh out heavily, still shocked by how much media coverage all of this was getting, and even more uncertain if you wanted to tell him everything.

“you alright ?” he suddenly asks, noticing the way your head hung low as you stared at your feet. it was as if he could read your mind.

you pause for a moment, battling with your own inner demons on whether or not it was a good time to tell him everything, but you decide to be honest. it was the least you could do after what happened the other day…

“actually no.. i’m not..” you couldn’t withhold this information all to yourself anymore, you had to tell mark. you needed to keep him from going to the spring formal; it wasn’t safe for him to go, even if you would be with him.

so you spill everything, starting off from the night of going to the bar with jay, how he was brutally murdered and left for dead by that girl band who used him as a sacrifice, you told him about how he was there in your kitchen, and how he ended up slaughtering so many innocent people in his wake. you felt so sure of yourself that mark would believe you, but you were soon proven wrong the minute he opened his mouth.

“yeah you’ve officially lost it y/n, i hope you know that.” he looks at you as if you’ve gone crazy, mirroring the same actions as you from the night that jay confessed to you.

“i’m telling the truth mark, you’ve gotta believe me. you have to promise me that you won’t go...” you practically beg, hoping that all of this won’t fall on deaf ears, but of course, he doesn’t listen.

“i’m sorry but i don’t believe anything you’re saying right now.” he chooses to remain stubborn, staying in his ignorant little bubble as if you were just making all of this up just to get a reaction out of him.

“mark, i love you and care about you so much, that’s why i’m asking you not to go.” you continue to try and reason with him, hoping that he’ll change his mind somehow, even if you sounded like a lunatic you didn’t care.

“he’s going to strike again that night, i can feel it. it’ll be like an all you can eat buffet for him !” you may not be the most morally correct person, but mark’s life was on the line. you just don’t want him getting turned into satan chow…

“look, i’m going and that’s final y/n. with or without you.” he wasn’t interested in hearing whatever else you had to say, he’s already made up his mind and there no use in changing it.

you huff out of frustration, unable to think of anything else so you do what you feel was best for him and the both of you. “mark, i really didn’t wanna have to do this but it isn’t safe for us to be together. i think it’s best we break up..”

his eyes widened, feeling the pace of his heart quicken at your sudden words, “what ? you can’t be serious, y/n.”

“i bet jay put you up to this, didn’t he ?” his jaw clenched, fuming at the thought of jay conspiring a whole plan in getting you two to finally break up, it’s what he always would’ve wanted, and now mark feels like he’s just lost that seven month long, intensive battle against him.

you repeatedly shook your head, denying his accusation. but deep down you knew that you’ve already broken his trust anyway. maybe it was for the better that you were no longer together.

“are you really too blinded to see? he’s always been a bad influence on you..” mark was fed up at this point, feeling rightfully hurt by how easily you wanted to end this relationship all because of jay. “if he told you to jump, i bet you’d ask ‘how high?’, he’s got you wrapped around his finger, controlling you like a damn puppet !”

you were now the one to get in defensive mode, visibly getting upset. but you couldn’t get too upset, you knew there was a small truth to that statement, you were willing to do a lot of things you normally wouldn’t for jay, but you weren’t just going to let mark talk to you like that. your pride was too strong, plus you were already dealing with enough as it is. parting ways from each other was probably the best solution for you two.

“no.. i was only trying to protect you, but don’t say i didn’t warn you..” you gave him one last chance to rethink his decision but you knew he wouldn’t.

on that note, you end up heading back home. leaving mark all alone to go ponder in his own thoughts, feeling his eyes burning holes into the back of your head as he watched you walk away, fading into the void of obscurity.

๑ ๑ ๑

the night of the spring formal was finally here. the night you’ve been dreading since having that conversation with mark, forcing you to break up with him. the minute you got here you’ve been on high alert, scanning the area for any sign of suspicious activity, bringing a swiss knife with you as an added layer of protection. everyone was dressed in their best attire, bodies swaying to the music as they all tried to have a good time despite of everything that’s been happening. you didn’t see mark which you thought was a good sign, but surprisingly, you also don’t see jay anywhere either.

you were engulfed in nostalgia once mr.bright side by the killers airs on the overhead speakers of the gymnasium; which used to be you and jay’s favorite song in high school, but that fond memory only brought a wave of sadness to your soul now. looking back on those days, you specifically remember how much jay’s presence gave you strength to keep going; to keep existing. you truly felt as though you had no reason to live, but he gave you one.

during your adolescent years, it was nothing but turbulence and chaos. your father would routinely come home at the crack of dawn, drunk as sin and belligerent, destroying everything he touched. your mother would do her best to shield you from seeing and hearing their daily arguments, telling you to go straight to your room and lock the door until she says it’s safe to come back out. but being the nosy, and curious child you were you’d push your ear up to the door and listen. hearing the most horrid, degrading words he’d spew, beating her black and blue until he physically grew tired and passed out on the couch. you’d run away from home a couple times, going to jay for comfort, finding solace in one another.

jay could easily relate to your struggles, how you both felt as though no one saw you as real, raw human beings. his father left before he was even born and his mother would dabble in sex work to keep the lights on. he despised every single one of those men who’d come into his home, sometimes his mom would be gone for several days on end, forcing him to grow up at a young age and take care of himself. he wanted to seek revenge on all of those men who violated her, kill them with his own bare hands. maybe that’s why he’d act out so much, he was just a kid being a kid— but no one ever saw the cries for help, no one paid attention to the signs. just labeled a pretty boy with ugly intentions. you never saw him that way though, you were the light at the end of the tunnel, his saving grace. yeah you may have been the awkward kid who didn’t talk much, but eventually he got you to open up. and ever since then, you’ve been conjoined at the hip.

a part of you still wants to believe that he’s that same naïve boy you once knew, still so lost and so confused. but you couldn’t keep making excuses for him, even if he was a damaged soul, so were you. you truly brought out the best and the worst of each other, having seen each other at some of your lowest points in life. which is why you made a vow to never leave the other behind, but we change and evolve over time, it’s natural to grow distant. jay simply couldn’t handle the fact that someone else made you smile, made you feel all those emotions he made you feel— you were slipping right through his fingers. you were all he had left. and he wasn’t going to lose you, not now, not ever.

๑ ๑ ๑

an hour’s passed by already and there was still no sight of either of the two. your mild worries would soon fester into full blown anxiousness when you get this innate feeling that mark could be in danger. you weren’t exactly sure where he was, or if he’s had an encounter with jay, but all you could think about right now was saving his life. even though you betrayed him in the end by sleeping with jay, you couldn’t let him die, you’d never be able to live with yourself if you let that happen. so you hurried out of there and went looking for him, having zero idea exactly where you were headed, but your mind just kept telling you run, run, run.

you don’t know how long you’ve been running for, maybe around twenty, thirty minutes ? who even knows anymore. your legs grew tired, stopping midway to take a breather, until you ended up at an old abandoned pool house. you had an overwhelmingly bad feeling about the place the more you looked at it, but when you heard the gut wrenching screams coming from inside that only confirmed your suspicions, sounding a lot like someone you knew. you ran inside, following their cries for help as you try and locate which direction it was coming from, only to find jay who seems to have found his next victim— your ex boyfriend.

“get away from him !” you demand while shouting from across the room. you can feel your heartbeat accelerate as you’re speed running towards them both, forcefully pushing him off of mark, tackling jay onto the floor.

“i thought you only did this to girls !” you had held some hope that jay wouldn’t harm him, but then again you should’ve known this was bound to happen..

“i guess you can say i go both ways,” he devilishly smirks, swiping the blood off his lower lip with the sleeve of black tux.

jay throws you off of him, causing you to wince in pain as your face made contact with the cold, tiled ground. you wouldn’t back down that easily though, getting right back up to finish what you started. sprinting towards him before he could get back to the work of his own brutality.

“you know, now that i think of it. you were never a good friend to me,” you angrily spat, walking up to him with your head held high, refusing to let fear win this time. “you used to rip the head off my barbie dolls and pour spoiled milk all over my bed !”

jay chuckles at your little speech, utterly amused by your resilience, even found it cute how you were still reminiscing about the past. “and now i’m eating your boyfriend, at least i’m consistent.” he shrugged.

“you make me fucking sick..” you grit through your teeth, grabbing ahold of him before he could take another bite out of mark’s shoulder.

using all your strength, you’d shoved him into the pool, submerging him into the water, attempting to drown him, but those efforts were futile when he regains control. he pulls you back, teeth becoming sharper, like tiny daggers, sinking them into the flesh of your neck. before you could react, you’re the one being lodged into the water; claw-like nails digging into your scalp, razor sharp, weighty against your skull.

it’s hard to keep your head above the water due to the forceful heaviness and before you know it, attempting to hold your breath renders itself useless due to large amounts of water infiltrating your lungs. you’re flailing, thrashing around, arms lifting— hands frantically attempting to grab ahold of anything, only to slash through the water, legs kicking mindlessly.

you had to get him off you real quick, or else you felt as though you were going to die. your body grew weaker and weaker, seeing your life flash before your very eyes as panic fully sets in. it felt as though this was going on for hours.. being edged by death over and over; feeling as if you were going to black out soon. your vision was blocked by the dark, murkiness of the water, ensuring to agitate you with fright, unsure of when it’s all going to come to an end.

and then it does… finally able to emerge from the coldness as you cough up all the water you inhaled. it took a few minutes for you to be able to learn how to breathe again, attempting to calm yourself down, only to turn around seeing both jay and mark wailing in pain for two completely different reasons. mark was lying on the ground, putting pressure on his neck as jay stood there frozen, holding onto the pool skimmer that was deliberately pierced through his stomach.

“you son of a fucking bitch…” he mutters, remaining still for a second, as if he was processing what just happened. a slew of more curses left his lips, sucking in air through his teeth to appease the pain as much as he can. he’d slowly but surely drop to his knees, and a few seconds later he’s collapsing to the ground in a pool of his own blood.

you go up to mark, staring down at his wounded figure, his neck and shoulder bleeding profusely. “i’m sorry i couldn’t save you..” you sniffled, unable to hold back tears you’ve shed, wishing you could’ve been just a few minutes earlier.

“it’s okay.. i love you y/n..” mark weakly spoke, coughing up red splatters of blood as he took his last few and final breathes.

you gave him one last kiss as his eyes closed, you checked for a pulse but there was no sign of life, officially pronouncing him dead. you turned around and jay was gone. forcing you to run out of the place to go and looking for him. there was no other option you had left at this point, it was either you or him that was going to end up dead tonight.

eventually you’d caught up to him in the woods, finding him at a nearby tree, as if he were waiting for you to come searching for him.

“i have to kill you..” you cut straight to the point, grabbing the swiss knife that was at the bottom of your ankle boot, pointing it towards him.

“not if i spill your pretty little guts all over this ground first,” jay laughs, barely moving an inch. still seeing this as all one big game to him, enjoying the thrill of it all.

“why’re you try to be the hero all of a sudden ? still feeling guilty you couldn’t save all those people who burned to death ? they were all a bunch of worthless scum anyway, if anything, i did them all a favor.” his head tilts as he asks so many questions, attempting to throw you off, knowing that it’d only agitate you further.

you backed away as he kept coming towards you, still pointing the sharp edge at him, “you’re wrong, jay. they all deserved to live yet you took it all away like the sick, inhumane fuck you are.”

“is that really what you think of me ? then why’d you let me take your precious virginity, hm ? can’t you see ? i’m the only person who actually ever gave a shit about you.” the smile on his face was so uncanny, as if it came straight out of a cartoon. he was nothing but pure evil, and he knew it.

you couldn’t bear to listen to him speak anymore, it was giving you a headache, you had to end this quickly. you remember while doing your paranormal digging, that a blade to the heart can kill any demon, now it’s all up to you to finish the job.

“i don’t care how long it takes, you’re going to die by the end of this night.” you stated matter-of-factly, you weren’t going down without a fight, and jay happily accepted your challenge with open arms.

he bursts out into more laughter, but it was anything but normal, it sounded maniacal, as if he were taunting you. “i’d love to see you try, sweetheart.”

he lunged forward to snatch the knife out of your hand, wrestling on the ground with him to try and get it back. you couldn’t let him win, not after all you’ve went through. all you had to do was plunge the weapon into his chest and you’d end this reign of terror once and for all. but once you obtained the knife, positioning it towards his chest, you couldn’t bring yourself to do it.

“if you’re going to do it then just get it over with. just do it already.” he bitterly spoke, repeating his words over and over, egging you on in your already frenzied state. even if you wanted to, you couldn’t, it was like the minute you had your chance, every particle inside of you froze…

“shut up, shut up, shut up !” you couldn’t even think straight, just shaking your head nonstop while screaming at him to stop talking.

jay could’ve easily overpowered you by now, but it was almost as if he wanted you to do it, willingly ready to die by the hands of you.

“and to think i used to truly believe you were my other half…” you looked at him in disgust, unable to see him as the man who you once knew for practically your whole life. you felt as though you wasted so many of your precious years befriending the most evil, conniving person on the planet.

“silly girl... don’t you remember ? i bit you, so you'll eventually obtain my supernatural powers.” he reminds you of what happened not even an hour before, “our souls are connected now.”

you shook your head in protest, refusing to even entertain that idea, “no… i could never be like you, i’d rather die than be like you..”

jay didn’t seem to be bothered at all by your opposing comments or your lack of compliance. if anything, it only made him want you even more. sure, you may not be cooperating now, but he’ll soon condition you into believing that the only thing you’ll ever need is him.

he cracks a faint smile, “i’m afraid it’s already too late for that, my darling,” he spoke to you softly. not even realizing he’s took the knife from your hands, bringing it down to your thighs, letting the blade run across your delicate skin.

“jay…” you say his name quietly, barely above a whisper. something inside you shifts the minute your gaze meets his, a warm, fuzzy feeling tickling a certain spot within your brain chemistry. you don’t know how to describe it, but your body feels different, so inexplicably different. as if it doesn’t even belong to you anymore.

“you know i’ve always loved you y/n,” jay sweetly coos into your ear, “i just have an awfully morbid way of showing it.”

his words flustered you to no end, feeling guilty for wanting to just give in, all the fight soon evaporating from your body. although you still had so much love for mark, your undying love for jay over the years trumped all of those emotions. the primal desire for him only grew once he’d connect his lips with yours. kissing you tenderly under the glowing moonlight. just you and him, along with the coppery taste of blood on each other’s lips.

you know why you couldn’t kill him. because if you did, you know there’d be no one else in this world who could ever understand you in the same way he does. the two of you shared an eternal bond that could never be erased nor replicated. if you were the kerosene, then he was the match, slow dancing in each other’s flames gracefully.

a made match in heaven ? no, more like a match made in hell.

[mattscoquette]

my experience meeting the triplets/ going to their tour ౨ৎ ⋆.˚ ✧

first i just wanna say, i am so so so insanely grateful to have attended both tours and to have met them twice. i’m not trying to brag or anything but a lot of people ask me and i figured it be easier for me to make one post rather than answer inbox questions a million times that get lost.

2/5/23 - let’s trip tour

i met the triplets for the first time during the let’s trip tour. i vividly remember being at work when the tickets went on sale and i was gonna go w my coworker but things fell thru and i went alone, and that alr was nerve wrecking enough. but i met a lot of cool people on line and everyone was super friendly. i got the pre-show small talk package, so i got to meet them before i saw them on stage. i also wrote them letters (idk if they ever opened them) but it was honestly fate when i stopped to drop them off in the present bin because there was a group of three girls in front of me so i wasn’t super rushed when i was meeting each triplet.

i met chris first! i was soooooo nervous but the second i started talking it all went away. the first thing i noticed was how small they are irl and immediately after was how fucking good chris smelled 😭 he was soo sweet. i told him how i loved watching their videos w my mom and that she was his favorite. i can’t rlly remember what else i talked about him with, and i tried to screen record my camera but i didn’t turn the mic on so i lost all the audio 😭😭

next was matttttt the loml. i was immediately soo comfortable around him, i was literally just talking like a normal conversation without even thinking. i asked him how the tour was going and he told me he was sad it was ending soon. and then i told him how one of my best friends is a triplet and we talked about that, he told me his dad is a twin and that everyone thinks he nick and chris are identical but they aren’t. he was so sweet and really listen to what you have to say, i had such a nice time talking with him.

when i met nick my auto pilot like shut off and i froze 😭😭 i literally out loud was like “i am so nervous” and he was so sweet about it, he hugged me a second time and was like “no don’t be it’s okay!” lmfaoo. i didn’t get to talk to him as long but i remember him telling me it was super nice to meet me after.

on line for the red carpet, i met madi! she was just walking around the venue, and she was over by me and i asked for a photo. she was soo sweet (and so pretty irl omfg). i didn’t wait in line for the red carpet for very long, i got merch, and then i did my photo w them :,) tbh i honestly don’t lovee it because i rlly don’t look the best in it lolol. bur ill pull thru and show u all. but this was back when u got to pick ur own poses and we all did hearts with one another (idk if that makes sense) and i stood next to my mannn😛😛

i look so diff now like i actually hate how i look when i met them but that’s beside the point 😭😭 but they all looked sooooo good. also for reference im about 5’3-5’4ish.

show-wise, it was sm more fun than the versus tour tbh. i got to see yung pleit perform and he opened w miss me and everyone was going insaneeeee. i was literally like one person behind the baracade, i was so close it was so so so cool. the triplets went on for maybe twenty minutes but they read the question i asked them which was so cool. and mary lou, jimmy, justin, and nate were all at my show!! they were on the balcony above the stage and were waving to us it was so cute. i had such a fun time at this show i wish i could go back

10/9/23 - the versus tour

this show was soooooo so so so special to me. i was going through a really really hard time. and this show made me so happy and gave me such a nice break from everything. this show wasn’t as close as the first show so i went to with my mom (she was team orange lol). i also got to meet some old online friends i made which was so nice :,) like the last tour, i got pre-show small talk. my only complaint though is that when i bought tickets backstage wasn’t available, some friends and i called the venue and they told us there was no backstage , but there actually was :( but im still sooooo grateful i got to meet them!

the order was the same as last time- chris, matt, then nick. i was so nervous about meeting them again, i literally almost forgot to take a pic w chris LMFAO. he was so sweet, he asked me how i was doing, if i was excited, all that good stuff. this time was a lot more rushed than the first, but i still got a decent amount of time with each triplet. i also got them each to draw me my fav angel numbers to get tattooed, i still haven’t gotten it yet but when i do i’ll post it :)

i was sooo nervous to meet matt again lmfao but as soon as i went up to him i felt fine. i complemented his outfit (he had on his white eeyore jacket 😭😭 so cute) and we took our picture and when i was leaving he told me it was rlly nice to meet me :,)) he is sooooooo pretty irl like his eyes r so blue and his earrings r so sparkly i was literally like in a trance. omfg.

nick was soo sweet he gave me such a big hug and was so smiley and asked how i was doing, same as chris. he also rested his head on mine when we took our pic togetherrr. he was so so kind.

my show was a monday so they had uploaded a podcast while i was on line for the red carpet, so i listened to that a bit while waiting. this tour we had pre-picked poses, but i did the hearts again. i stood in between matt and chris, and i said i wanted hearts and matt immediately did half the heart and put his arm around me so we did the heart tgth 😭😭

lowk not a fan of this pic either but :( so sweet. i love them so much. i also wore platform shoes this time lol so that gave me some height.

the show was so good! so much more entertaining than what the triplets did the first time. it was very engaging, and so fun to watch. lowk bitter i didn’t get picked to be matt’s teammate but we move. anyway. each challenge was so fun, me and my friend knew almost all the trivia questions they did 😭😭 and jenga was sooo stressful to watch lmfao it was so close the whole time, i think we had one of the longest jenga shows of the tour lmfao. chris ended up winning bc matt dropped the jenga tower and they were both tied. it was such a fun experience im so grateful to have gone !

© mattscoquette

[gguk-n]

From Pitches to Podium (Oscar Piastri x Indian Cricketer!Reader)

This idea came to me after I saw Pat Cummins at the British GP. No face claim. All the pictures are from Pinterest or Instagram

y/n.y/l/n

Liked by 1378 others

y/n.y/l/n Ever since I was a little girl playing street cricket, I had dreamt of this. Dreams really do come true. Can't wait to lead the best team to more victories. Thank you for believing in me!!😭😭💙💙

user 1 Congrtulations. You're a great team player, you'll be a good leader👊👊 user 2 Can't wait to see you as the captain y/l/n🥹🥹

y/n.y/l/n

Liked by 13,869 others tagged oscarpiastri

y/n.y/l/n I had told myself that I would behave like a professional but I can't; not when Oscar Jack Piastri just won his first F1 race (It might have been a sprint but idc) Congratulations Oscar!!😭😭🥹🥹🧡🧡🧡

user 3 I thought this was a Oscar fan account, turns out she's the captain of India's women's cricket team 🤣🤣🤣 user 4 Congratulations Oscar!!🧡🧡 user 5 Hope to see you win like I saw Oscar won!!😪❤️❤️ bff/user you are a PR nuisance!! How does your coach and manager deal with you? 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

oscarpiastri

Liked by y/n.y/l/n, mclaren and 240,250 others

oscarpiastri Suitcase going to weigh a little more on the way home😃🏆

mclaren 🙌🙌 y/n.y/l/n SO PROUD OF YOU OSCAR!! CONGRATULATIONS!! 😭😭🧡🧡 user 6 SO DESERVED!! thrilled for you user 7 where are you going to put it?? user 8 beautiful user 1 she's back guys!! Oscar's No.1 fan 😂😂

oscarpiastri

Liked by landonorris, y/n.y/l/n and 287,756 other

oscarpiastri F1 race winner has a nice ring to it 🧡 landonorris Congrats mate! Deserve it👊 oscarpiastri landonorris Thanks mate👊 mclaren YES, YES IT DOES So good today, Oscar🧡 oscarpiastri mclaren Thanks guys 🧡 y/n.y/l/n I'm literally crying right now!! Can't wait to watch you win the WDC😭😭😭 user 2 y/n.y/l/n ma'am please focus on your own sport🙃🙃 user 3 The best boy!!❤️❤️❤️

oscarpiastri

Liked by y/n.y/l/n and 209,323 others

oscarpiastri N1CE

y/n.y/l/n 😭😍😍😍 user 4 I can't believe you won the sprint!! user 5 I'm so happy rn user 6 You deserve all this and so much more

y/n.y/l/n

Liked by oscarpiastri and 56,789 others

y/n.y/l/n We had a good season!! Bummed we didn't make it to the finals but happy with our performance over all. We'll work harder to get the T20 World Cup trophy home next time.

oscarpiastri Good match!!💙💙 Liked by author user 7 Thank god he noticed her, it was starting to get embarrassing🫢🫢 user 8 Good match, we'll beat the aussies next time!!🫣🫣 user 1 manifestation is real. she's the living example😭😭

y/n.y/l/n

Liked by oscarpiastri, mclaren and 102,258 others tagged oscarpiastri, landonorris, mclaren

y/n.y/l/n Got to meet the LOML and some random guy named Lando, thanks McLaren for the opportunity!! Now you guys gotta come and support me in one of my matches!!🧡🧡💙💙

landonorris that was uncalled for😪😪 y/n.y/l/n landonorris I'm sorry, it sounded better in my head 😶😶 mclaren we loved having you. Orange suits you🧡 oscarpiastri It was nice to finally meet my no. 1 fan!! y/n.y/l/n oscarpiastri 🫣🧡 user 2 she's gonna talk about this for the rest of her life🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️ user 3 she looks so cute😍😍 user 4 I saw her at the GP, the heart eyes for Oscar were unreal🥹🥹

oscarpiastri

Liked by y/n.y/l/n, landonorris, mclaren and 287,965 others tagged y/n.y/l/n

oscarpiastri If someone had told me last year that I would be in love with a cricketer I would've laughed at you. Right now, I can't imagine a day without my pretty cricketer!! Love you so much!!

y/n.y/l/n I love you too!! Does this mean you'll support India now? oscarpiastri y/n.y/l/n No. I'm sorry, I don't love you that much 🫥 y/n.y/l/n oscarpiastri WOW!! what a boyfriend you are?! 😯 user 5 Congratulations you too!! So cute❤️❤️ user 6 This is a win for desi girls ❤️🥹 user 7 Your Honor, I think I love love.❤️❤️ landonorris Congratulations you two!! Liked by author mclaren hottest athletic couple on the grid🧡 Liked by author

y/n.y/l/n

Liked by oscarpiastri and 139,864 others tagged oscarpiastri

y/n.y/l/n I didn't know when I put Oscar Piastri is the LOML into the universe it would become a reality. But it did. That's motivation for you all to keep working towards your dreams and goals whether it is your career or a man!! I love you babe. 😍😍❤️🧡💙Ek pardesi mera dil legaya!! A foreigner took my heart

oscarpiastri I love you too!! Can't wait to live out my WAG fantasies y/n.y/l/n oscarpiastri I'm gonna drag you along to all my matches now😈 user 8 Oscar is unreal user 1 they are the cutest!! bff/user You would think she'd stop yapping about Oscar, it got worse guys it got worse😤🤦‍♀️ user 2 Y/N please put him a black kurta!! I'M BEGGING YOU ITS FOR SCIENCE!!🥹🥹

Hope you enjoy

[vampkittyxoxo]

HII i love your blog, i was hoping i could request draco x reader hcs (how he'd be as a bf and nsfw hcs because hes so hot im sorry) thanks!! 💕

Thank you!! Hehe I agree, Draco is like the hottest brawler (besides the loml Gray)

Gender wasn't specified, so neutral pronouns were used + varied headcanons dependent on gender

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ*:.*:..*:...｡o○　　○o｡..:*..:*..:*Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ*:.*:..*:...｡o○　　○o｡..:*..:*..:*Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ

Draco x reader - Romantic + NSFW headcanons

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ*:.*:..*:...｡o○　　○o｡..:*..:*..:*Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ

Romantic

~ Although I already made a post about this, I'll add some new ones :)

~ Draco loves having nights where you two just sit in bed, turn on some music (even if it isn't his style... he will begrudgingly listen), and talk and laugh about the silliest things. Quality time!

~ He likes seeing you wear his performance outfit. He gets so flustered!

~ Draco probably loves playing games intended for kids on Roblox with you and gets sad when you don't want to play them. Like, what do you mean you don't want to play [NEW UPDATE!] SUPER SNAKE CLICKER [40M VISITS] ???

~ He bugs you nonstop to get you to try to play his guitar. If you don't know how to play, he'll teach you (as best as he can...), and if you do, Draco will be competitive about it-- always trying to one-up you and make himself seem like the better player (even if he isn't).

~ Draco loves scaring you at any opportunity he gets. Bonus points if you're a very jumpy person.

~ If you have stuffed animals, he will create backstories for all of them, give them names and personalities, all just to play with them for five minutes.

-----------------

NSFW

~ He's not very good at foreplay... Since he's so easy to turn on, he thinks it won't take much to get you going either. And if that's true, then he really is in luck. But otherwise, you may have to guide him and tell him to slow it down.

~ Draco is amazing at giving head, boy or girl. Just be careful, his canines are a little sharp. He adores feeling you squirm beneath him while he holds onto your legs.

~ He lovesss it when you give him head. He literally melts at the sight of you going down on him, even to the point he may let a whimper escape...

~ Draco just loves it when you call him 'Master'... I mean, he is the master of the dragons and whatnot. Call him that while he's going down on you and he'll have to resist every urge to fuck you right then and there.

~ He can get pretty rough, and if you’re into that he will make it amazing. If not, he’ll do everything to make sure you’re comfy.

~ As far as kinks go, I’d imagine stuff such as choking, knife play, perhaps some s/m as well (he likes receiving pain more than giving, like you scratching him, but also enjoys giving if that’s your thing).

~ He is primarily a top/dominant, but admittedly loves it when he’s submissive. Even if your fem-aligned, he has plenty of money to get a strap on.

~ Draco has a pretty decent stamina from jerking off every day as a teen. Around 15 minutes usually, but can go up to an hour before he’s crying and begging to finally finish.

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ*:.*:..*:...｡o○　　○o｡..:*..:*..:*Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ

First actual post in a while! So sorry, life has been lifing… lots of college prep and a terrible situationship… at least I have brawl stars

[starmocha]

Why did I let you guys convince me dragon!Sylus AU was a good idea 😔😔😔

I am agonizing over this. I managed to work out a story, but dear god do I want to cry. So far I have...basically a ton of unfinished sloppy scenes, the intro alone is about 2k words, and I still have other scenes I haven't started yet.....

Key themes: Soulmates, Red String of Fate, reincarnation, forbidden love, Sylus @ MC: “ily my beloved, my heart and soul, loml, wifey”, Sylus @ everyone else: “fuck the rest of y’all”, probably sexy time with Sylus nah ok we’ll fuck a dragon i mEAN HE’LL BE A HUMANOID VERSION YOU GET IT RIGHT WE’RE NOT HAVING ACTUAL LITERAL DRAGON DICK 😔, Egg Laying 🙂, just….grossly in love with you Sylus is best Sylus, light angst & smut & fluff ig idk

ANYWAY. This is the only actual completed and coherent scene lol

For context: an erhu is a Chinese instrument (also found in other Asian countries), similar to a fiddle in a sense. Here's an amazing erhu cover of the theme song from the film, House of Flying Daggers. Here's another breathtaking cover from the same performer for the Inuyasha's theme, To Love's End.

You were about to retire for the night, but as you walked down the corridors, you could have sworn you heard music. You paused in your steps, your ears tuning into the sounds. It was distant and faint, but it sounded like someone was playing an erhu. You followed the melancholic melody, down the long corridors, rounding a corner and straight on down the path until you saw at the very end a pavilion overlooking a moonlit lake. You could make out the lone dark figure sitting, recognizing it was Skye. You approached him cautiously, keeping your steps silent. He sat with his back to you, apparently unaware. You could see a teal porcelain bottle of liquor and a filled cup next to him as he lounged lazily, one long leg was stretched out while his other was propped up. Between his legs was an erhu. You followed his movements, watching the bow gliding across the two-stringed instrument with practiced ease. The melody played made your heart ached, evoking a feeling of nostalgia or even déjà vu. Skye appeared to be gazing at the dark night sky, lost in memories. You were startled when he spoke, his tone even, “How long do you plan to stand there?” “How did you know it was me?” You walked closer to him. “I always know when you are near,” he murmured, his words puzzling you, but it seemed Skye had no inclination of elaborating further. He set the instrument aside, and picked up his cup, downing the liquor in seconds. You watched as he poured himself another drink. You knelt next to him. “May I have a drink?” Skye looked momentarily surprised before handing you his cup.

You accepted it gratefully. You politely turned to the side as you drank it slowly. It was strong. Skye drank it like it was water, but for you, you could feel it burning your throat and leaving a bitter aftertaste. You refrained from grimacing and coughing. After composing yourself, you handed the cup back to Skye, seeing his amused smirk. You blushed.

“It’s lonely to drink by yourself,” you explained. You could feel a heat building up inside you, unsure if it was from just that small drink or perhaps from the way Skye observed you. “I suppose,” Skye responded lukewarmly, pouring a new drink for himself. To your astonishment, he gulped it down easily. As he prepared to pour his next cup, you reached out and stopped him. He looked up, his expression unreadable. You felt a little lightheaded. The alcohol was stronger than you had expected. “Skye…” “What is it?” “Do you often drink by yourself?” He smiled, but there was no joy in his expression. He resumed pouring his next cup, saying softly, “The moon is lovely tonight, and the liquor is so sweet.” You looked at him curiously. “They say liquor only tastes sweet when everything else in your life is bitter.” “Is that so?” he asked noncommittally, drinking his next cup. He set the cup down on the floor with a clatter before reaching over to you, grasping your chin, making you gasped in surprise, startled by his sudden action. Skye leaned in close and you smelled the heavy stench of alcohol on his breath. His eyes remained the same, focused and calculating. His expression was neutral, and he still appeared to be sober in spite of how many cups he had drank so far. Even so, you couldn’t help but noticed something in his expression when he looked at you. “Skye…” He tilted his head a little, waiting. “Why do you…” You touched his cheek. “…look so sad?” He paused, startled. He pulled away from you immediately, turning his sight back to the lake. “It is late,” he said coldly, “A young lady should not be alone with a man like this. Go to bed.” You crawled closer to him, settling in between his legs as you looked up at him with flushed cheeks. Skye looked down at you, resigned. He caressed your cheek, his hand felt so cooling on your warm skin. “Already this tipsy from one drink?” he asked softly, amused. There was a soft warmth in his voice again. “It’s stronger than I thought…” You leaned forward, falling into his arms. You yawned softly. You felt so tired all of a sudden. Skye steadied his balance with one hand on the wooden floor while his other arm wrapped around your waist. He smirked as you lay against him. “My lady,” he said, “…wouldn’t this be considered indecent?” You sleepily murmured against his chest, “…You wouldn’t do anything to me…” “You have such trust in me?” he asked, laughing. He pulled your body closer to his. Skye leaned down, inhaling your sweet floral scent. “What if I say it’s taking all of my self-control to not ravage you right now?” You looked up at him, your face feeling even warmer. You wondered if it was because of the alcohol or Skye’s words. You weren’t entirely sure, unable to truly decipher his tone and meaning in your current mindset. You sulked at him. “Don’t tease me…” “Who said I am teasing you?” His face leaned in closer, his lips centimeters from yours. Just the smell of the alcohol from his breath made you dizzy, feeling like you could get even more intoxicated just breathing him in. His lips drew closer to yours, and as he spoke, you felt a chill running down your body, his breathy voice ensnaring you under his spell, his voice reminiscent of another’s: “My beloved.”

[eggluverz]

danheng and reader are interns at the same company and there’s one sided beef from reader’s end cuz they’re trying to compete with him but he’s clueless and just thinks she’s hardworking and cute 😭

— THE INTERNS

In which you view your internship as a competition and Dan Heng is simply attracted to your hard work and determination.

PAIRING. dan heng x f!reader

WORD COUNT. 1788

GENRE. modern au. rivals? to lovers?

NOTE. ty anon for this super fun request!! <3 clueless dan heng the loml… and reader is so chaotic ngl alsjdkdl i hope u enjoy !! ^-^

“Can somebody handle the emails from the Realm-Keeping Commission?” Mr. Yang asked as he rushed through the intern’s cubicle area. He had a cup of tea in one hand and a handful of folders in the other. “They’ve had a recent breach of contract issue so we should be getting an influx shortly.”

“I can handle it!” you immediately spoke up, sparing your cubicle-mate a brief glance. You had a smile on your face but your eyes were urging him not to butt in.

Dan Heng smiled back. “I’ll help her.”

“Great.” Mr. Yang nodded in appreciation. “We have such hard-working interns this year.“

Your eye twitched as you replied, “Right. Great.”

Once the intern director left, you turned to glare at Dan Heng. He was nonchalantly typing on his computer, no doubt responding to the Commission’s emails already. A job that you should’ve been doing alone. Alongside a million other things that naturally came with being an unpaid intern.

You wanted to prove yourself here. The Astral Express was well known in the industry and you wanted nothing more than a job offer after the internship. But how could you possibly secure that when Dan Heng constantly stole your shine? You had to keep pushing. Keep striving to do more and impress your bosses.

“Hey, Y/N,” said Dan Heng. “If you have too much on your plate, I can take care of the emails today.”

Heat rose to your cheeks as you frowned in indignation. “You think I can’t handle it?”

He titled his head to the side. The innocent look on his face made you more upset. You couldn’t tell if he was making fun of you or if he truly believed you were someone pitiful who needed constant help.

“Of course you can handle it,” he reassured. “I don’t doubt that. I just don’t want you to take on too much of the workload. I’ve noticed you push yourself quite a lot.”

You shook your head. “I’m not pushing myself too much. I can do it.”

Dan Heng’s gaze softened. “You know yourself best. But I just hope you don’t overwork yourself too hard. We’re only unpaid interns, remember.”

You puffed your cheeks indignantly. Of course he could say something like that and still be a top performer. “Thanks for the consideration, but don’t worry about me. Now, if you’ll excuse me… I better get back to work.”

He only nodded in response.

As you started scanning through the emails on your computer, responding to the ones you have already finished, you felt Dan Heng still looking at you. You turned your face away from his desk so you wouldn’t be directly in his field of vision, unsure why he was staring but not really wanting to find out. Besides, you had more important things to get to. How could you possibly get more work done than Dan Heng if you were too busy worrying about why he kept looking at you?

Perhaps his innocence was a facade and he was playing mind games to slow you down.

With a huff of determination, you worked extra fast, not wanting to let his plan succeed. He’d have to do better than that to win.

˖⁺‧₊˚❀˚₊‧⁺˖

It was your lunch break the next day and for the first time since you started (except for those times Mr. Yang wanted to take the interns out for lunch), you were not eating at your desk to work through the lunch period.

Apparently, HR was visiting the office so you all had to follow all the policies, no matter how silly anyone found them.

Instead of your desk, you were eating at a shaded seating area outside of the office. If you weren’t going to work through your break, you might as well enjoy it and get a breath of fresh air while you were at it. With your high ambition and willingness to push yourself for this internship, you were aware it probably seemed like you were a workaholic of sorts. That wasn’t exactly true.

You saw the important of work-life balance and valued it, but you also figured an internship is where you were supposed to work extra hard. Then, once you secured the job, you would be free to relax.

You took a bite of your sandwich you packed as you stared off at the gently swaying trees in the distance.

“Hey.” You almost jumped at the sudden sound. “Can I join you?”

You slowly turned towards Dan Heng, blinking. First, he tormented you in the office as an intern who provided ample competition. Now, he wanted to torment you during your lunch too?

Despite your inner thoughts, you didn’t want to be rude. Deep down you knew he was also just an intern doing his best. You just had to do better.

“Sure,” you acknowledged. “Have a seat, nemesis.” The words escaped your mouth before you could stop yourself. “I mean… Dan Heng…”

His brows furrowed. “I find it hard to believe those two words could get confused so easily.”

You cleared your throat. “Not sure what you mean.” Before Dan Heng could respond, you changed the subject. “What did you bring for lunch?”

As he sat next to you, he showed you his opened tupperware. It contained the yummiest smelling food with very neat presentation. You figured it probably tasted even better than it smelled or looked.

“I packed a bento box for today.”

You looked down at your soggy sandwich. Was even lunch a competition to him? Did he have to be the best at everything? You vowed to look up the most intricate lunch recipe and show it off to him once you made it.

He looked at your sandwich wordlessly before taking a bite of tender meat.

Your face burned in shame.

Tomorrow, you told yourself. Tomorrow you’d show him.

˖⁺‧₊˚❀˚₊‧⁺˖

Today, your internship started around noon. It wasn’t a whole day of work and you knew fully well you didn’t need to pack lunch. Still, you stayed up all night perfecting this recipe and you had to show Dan Heng you were worthy competition as well. You even made enough servings to pack a meal for Dan Heng to try too.

Towards the middle of your shift, you walked over to his desk.

He paused his typing and looked up at you. “Can I help you?”

You held out a tupperware of your homemade food. “Look. I made this.”

Dan Heng’s eyes widened as he cautiously took the container from your hands. “For me?”

“Yeah. I saw your bento box yesterday and wanted to prove that I can also cook! Just like I can do all the work we’re assigned!”

Confusion was written all over his face but he still managed to smile. “First, thank you for making this for me.”

You looked at him, equally confused. Why did he sound so sincere? You simply wanted to prove a point. Not do something out of the kindness of your heart.

“Second,” he continued, “I do agree you can do all the work we’re given. Have I made you feel like I believe otherwise?”

“Not exactly… It’s just you keep offering to help me even when I say I’ll do it!” you explained passionately. “You keep trying to steal my work and do more than me!”

Dan Heng blinked, mouth opening then closing. He opened his mouth once more, trying again. “I wasn’t aware you viewed it as me stealing your work.” He rested his chin on his hand as he thought things through. “I didn’t want you overexerting yourself so I was only trying to help ease your workload… I’m sorry for undermining your hard work.”

“You’re not doing it on purpose?”

“No. I admire your determination and how you always step up to the task— I would never want to take away from that,” he said earnestly. His stare was unwavering as he looked into your eyes. “I more than admire it, actually. I find it quite attractive even.”

You gaped at him, unmoving. “Huh?”

“Attractive, endearing, cute… Do you need more synonyms?”

“Me?” You pointed at yourself.

Dan Heng nodded. “Well, I was referring to your work ethic. But yes. You as well.”

You bashfully stood up straighter. “You’re not too bad yourself, I suppose.”

That wasn’t a lie. You did find Dan Heng rather attractive. His hair was dark and messy, falling around his eyes in a way you could only describe as perfectly framing the vibrant blues. He had a pretty face and a serious demeanor that initially drew you to him— Until he started competing (as you saw it, at least) with you in your internship.

As you stared at each other in silence, Mr. Yang came in with a stack of papers. “Good afternoon, everyone. Can someone run an audit of the company’s stocks?”

You jumped up, startled. You didn’t except to be interrupted like that, but you quickly regained your composure, rushing over to him to grab the papers. A part of you was thankful for the distraction, but another part of you wanted to see where it would’ve lead. “I can do the audit!”

“Great, thank you!” he said in acknowledgment before rushing back out.

Once Mr. Yang left, Dan Heng turned to you and said, “Let me know if you need any help. I’m here if you need.”

You smiled. Now that you knew he wasn’t trying to best you, you were much more open to the idea of working together. “Sure, I’d love some help.” You paused and Dan Heng raised one brow. Though it came from the heart and the sentiment was there, you both knew it wasn’t completely true. You still did want to be the very best after all. “Well… You can help, but only a little though.”

Dan Heng laughed, accepting the small stack of papers you gave him, not even one fourth as tall as your pile. “I wouldn’t expect anything less from you.”

You hummed in agreement. Before focusing on your work, you thought of one small thing to ask him. “Hey, Dan Heng?”

“Yes?”

“Maybe next week you can bring me some lunch, too? Or, maybe we could go out for dinner even…”

“I’d love to,” Dan Heng smiled and it was the widest grin you’ve seen on his face thus far, “if you give me more of your paperwork.”

You gasped, feeling thoroughly tricked. So he did want to beat you—?

“That way, we can finish sooner and I can take you to dinner tonight.”

Your train of thoughts stopped in their tracks as a light chuckle escaped your lips. “Fine,” you agreed, finding yourself strangely looking forward to having dinner with him. “But just this once, okay?”

“Of course.”

dan heng: *stares at reader*

reader: he’s playing mind games to make me nervous and slow me down

dan heng: she’s hardworking and passionate and so cute u.u

[miguelschamp]

loml

pairing: luke patterson x fem!reader

summary: 25 years later, you get a message from luke

warnings: sadness. again.

a/n: for @presleyluvschris. this is a part two to bigger than the whole sky. you don’t necessarily have to read it to understand, but it may help :)

25 years. 25 years had passed since luke died. you hadn’t been the same since. no matter who you met or tried to be with, no one could fill the void that luke left. not to mention, alex and reggie who you had grown close to, due to luke, slipping through your fingers.

as time went on, you had truly tried your hardest to move on. luke always spoke to you about living life and never letting anything hold you back. but no matter how many people you had tried to be with, they never lived up to luke.

of course, it wasn’t their fault that you had always compared them to him. sure, not all of them were angels on earth, but if you were being honest, no one would ever compare to luke.

you’d known luke your entire life. your parents knowing each other way before you were born and being sure you guys were best friends.

he wasn’t just your boyfriend, he was your best friend. the one person who knew everything about you. the one person who could read you like a book. the only person you truly believed in and loved like no other.

so, when a teenage girl knocked on your door saying she knew luke, it confused you.

as you let her in, you turned to her with furrowed brows, “i’m sorry. what did you say your name was?”

“julie.” she smiled, “julie molina.”

“oh, hi, julie.” you nodded, “i’m y/n.”

“i know.” she chuckled softly

your brows furrowed, “and you said that you know luke? as in present tense?”

“yes.”

“i’m sorry, but i’m not sure how that’s possible.” you chuckled in disbelief, “he- he died 25 years ago.”

julie nods again with a small smile before holding out her phone, “it may sound ridiculous, but they came back as ghosts.”

your frown deepens as you take her phone from her. your heart races as you watch julie perform with luke, reggie, and alex.

that couldn’t be possible. right?

“i’m sorry, i’m extremely confused.”

“i get it. it’s not something you’d understand easily.” she smiles, “after they passed, they never actually made it to the other side. they had some unfinished business and in turn, ended up as ghosts. they’ve been hanging around with me for the past few months.”

julie watches as another wave of confusion passes over you, “julie-“

you’re cut off as you watch julie look past you, you turn looking around just seeing the small table you had against your wall. a few trinkets laid across it. nothing in a particular place. more like a junk table.

you turn back to her as she chuckles. she nods before looking over at you, “the last conversation you had with him, he was telling you about the orpheum.”

your face softens as she continues, “he told you that he wouldn’t have made it that far without you. you were the only thing keeping him going.”

your breathe bitches as you recall your last conversation with luke. no one, but the two of you would know about that.

“how-“ you start before looking around, “luke?”

you look around for a few seconds before your eyes land on julie. she gives a sad smile, “he’s here. he says he loves you. always will.”

a quiet sob escapes you as a tear rolls down your cheek. your hand coming up to wipe it away, “i love you, too. so much.”

julie can’t help the tears that fill her eyes. watching you as you looked around for the boy you loved. her eyes trailing over to luke who stood behind you. his own eyes red and filled with tears as he watched you. his heart shattering as he reaches out and his hand simply phases through your arm.

julie then remembers the note luke wrote you. she reaches in her back pocket as she steps closer, “he wanted me to give this to you. he said he knows it’s not much, but there was so much he wants to say.”

you take the paper gingerly from her as you look up to her, “thank you so much.”

“of course.” julie says, “i’ll leave you with it.”

you give her a soft smile before she walks over toward the door. turning and waving to you before closing it behind her.

you then look down at the folded paper in your hand. your chest tightening as you debated reading it. it wasn’t like you hadn’t thought about what’d you say to luke or how his voice would’ve sounded like if he were still around. because you did. everyday.

but having something from him that hadn’t been around for 25 years, made your heart race.

you take a deep sigh as you sit on your couch. you slowly open up the note immediately taking in luke’s messy handwriting. you chuckled softly as a tear rolls down your cheek. your eyes then flickering up to the first word.

hey, baby. i know this isn’t exactly how you imagined our next conversation going. it wasn’t how i imagined it either. i just want you to know how much i miss you. there hasn’t been a day that’s gone by that i haven’t thought of you. everyday i regret even going to the orpheum. knowing that i left you behind to live without me. that’s not ever something that i thought would happen and i hate that it did. i hope you know how much i still love you. you’re the only person that’s ever truly understood me and i can’t thank you enough for believing in me. i never would’ve even made it to the stupid arena if it wasn’t for you.

there’s no one i would’ve rather spent my 17 years with. i don’t know how i would’ve made it that long without you. i hope you’re living your life like i always told you to. i don’t want to be the thing holding you back. no matter what, you’ll always be my girl. i love you so much, baby. more than you’ll ever know or understand. live life for me.

- luke

you hadn’t realized you were crying until you looked up from the note. the paper littered with wet spots from the tears that fell. you sniffle as you look back down at the note.

“i love you.” you cry, “i love you so much.”

you pull the note to your chest as your eyes shut tightly. sobs leaving your lips as you thought about luke.

“i love you, baby. never forget that. please.” luke says as he sits beside you. knowing you couldn’t hear him, but feeling as though he had to say it. praying that by some miracle you’d hear him or see him. but as you looked around and even directly at him, he knew he was still invisible to you.

but even if seeing your beautiful face or hearing your soft voice meant you’d never see or hear him, he’d be okay with that. because no matter what, luke loved you. and no time in the universe would ever change that.

[deadricslover]

tracing roses

a/n: first post for the loml! I'm a harry Stan 'til I die.

summary: with a whole bunch of changes for the future of one direction, harry doesn't know how he will cope and thankfully you're there to comfort him in his favourite ways.

warnings: no established relationship, anxiety, cursing, Zayn leaving :(, mentions of the management ugh (that deserves a full tw), short post?

pairings: lhh styles x sixthmember!reader

I know that the timeline of events doesn't match the real life one but it's all for the post ok?

-------------------------------------------------

What the media portrayed harry to be was the complete opposite of what he was actually like. His reputation was the womanizer, cool and reserved guy who didn't have the time of day for anyone other than the band, and really, it was just unfair because none of that was true. Really, Harry was the sweetest guy who cared for every single person he met and would make a whole room light up with the sparkle in his eyes. Despite what the media thought, He had feelings, and needed comfort here and there like every other person.

This particular upcoming show was an important one, it was Zayn's last show in the band but the public didn't know yet, so they had to make it count. Nobody was really themselves today as they knew they had to make a good impression for management if they wanted to continue touring and making music without him as a five person group. These emotions were hightened due to the overwhelming sudden surge of sadness and loss due to Zayn's news. Zayn was your best friend alongside Harry and you honestly didn't know how you were going to cope with not having him around when writing songs or performing anymore.

You stumble into Harry's dressing room to let him know we will be going on stage soon, but are met with a teary eyed Harry with his head in his hands. You make your way over to him and wrap your arms around him from the back whilst tracing circles on his arm and place your head on his shoulder, comforting him.

"I know, Haz. I know" you whisper kissing his temple slightly.

"this is just such a big change" he cries

"I know. and it's going to be so hard for us all to adjust to. But, we have gotta support his decision" you explain squeezing him a little tighter. he replies with a teary sigh, gazing at you through the mirror silently asking to be comforted

"even though I can't fix it, I can help you through it" you add leaning your head on his, sadly smiling a little bit, closing your eyes momentarily.

"I'm just gonna miss him" he confesses, the tears making their way to his eyes once again. Seeing him upset always made your heart drop with sadness, and a set of your own tears pricks your eyes seeing one of your favourite people upset.

"I know, haz. let it out, ok? I'm right here" you comfort as he stares blankly at the desk ahead of him

"I think that the mix of Zayn leaving and the anxiety because this show being so important is just making me so much more emotional" he explains his feelings and you listen intently the entire time, empathizing with him as you feel the same way. This is about him though, he doesn't need to know.

you plant kiss after kiss onto his face, cheek, temple and hair in comfort and keep twirling pieces of his hair around your fingers to calm him down. He takes a deep breath in and out to regain himself before looking back at you through the illuminated mirror.

"what time are we on?" he asks

"we have time" you lie. you came into him with fifteen minutes before the show and now you're running late, but, for an important reason. You didn't want him suppressing any feelings.

he looks at you confused, not entirely believing you but leaning back into your touch and closing his eyes nonetheless, while tracing shapes onto your arm wordlessly telling you that he's grateful for you.

your moment is rudely interrupted by Louis Bursting in the door chaotically.

"guys, why the fuck aren't you on stage. we are late. stop cuddling and kissing and get out and get your mics" Louis demands

Harry hops up and looks at you accusingly. You shrug and leave the room with him, both of you following Louis to the stage. You get your assigned microphones and head towards the stage. Harry grabs your arm on the way and stops you both, facing you and looking down at you with a hand on your upper arm.

"Thank you so much for that. I don't know what I would do without you, I really don't" he informs you referring to you comforting him, making your heart throb.

"it's nothing, harry. just want to make you feel better" you reply smiling wholeheartedly at him.

"I love you so much" he confesses, wrapping you in a hug around your arms and you slip yours around his waist to reciprocate.

"I love you too, haz. always here for you" you reply before the six of you get on stage and open with clouds, and nobody can deny that this show wouldn't be the same and that you would all be acting different.

halfway through 'story of my life' harry was sitting down towards the back of the stage looking quite down and nervous as he knew come the end of this song, you guys would have the encore and then the show would be over, concluding the chapter with Zayn in the group. you jog to the back and sit down next to him grabbing his hand in yours lightly and he lays his head down onto your shoulder.

"you good?" you ask him

"mhm" he replies humming. you didn't buy it, you knew him better than that.

you look down to his hand in yours and examine his tattoos for a minute. your eyes land on the rose tattoo next to his elbow and the perfect shading. Your thumb starts tracing the petals and thorns on the design, comforting him as he is focusing on the feeling of your hand. You knew this calmed him down. He takes a couple of deep breaths and continues singing after Louis finishes his part whilst visibly calming down yet again. He gets up from where he was sitting and starts walking around the stage interacting with a couple of fans and the guys maintaining the hold on your hand bringing you around while you giggle to yourself. This doesn't go unnoticed by fans and you were sure you would see some twitter posts about it later, but in the moment you didn't care, all you cared about was making him feel better and calming his anxiety about this whole show.

you were super lucky to have a harry in your life. You think everyone should have a harry in their life too. And he feels the same about you, he thinks everyone should have one of you in their life too. But then again, he didn't want to share you with anybody. He loved you comforting him, and knew that you would always be there for him and visa versa.

everyone needs a you and harry pair in their life.

[midnightsslut]

Getaway Car / august / The Other Side of the Door mashup lyrics (Melbourne Night 2)

Aaaand their possible connection to The Tortured Poets Department

I’m going to do this for each of the mashups she performed at the 2024 shows, because I firmly believe that she chose the songs for a reason and arranged the lyrics / switched between songs carefully to craft entirely new stories. A lot of the themes those songs hinted at have since been explored in detail on the new album. This mashup, which discusses the concept of cheating from three different perspectives, is perhaps the best example. She switches POVs between the cheater in the getaway car, the other woman realizing she never had her lover in the first place, and the woman who had to leave after being cheated on but still misses her ex.

Taylor switches to the chorus of august

back to Getaway Car

and onto the outro of The Other Side of the Door

She wants to leave her relationship, and this man is the perfect getaway car/‘reason’ for her to do so. Of course she would leave. She quickly realizes that the new relationship is doomed as well. They never had a shot. He was never hers. The entire relationship seemed to only last a single month and was over when the summer ended. At the end of the mashup, she assumes the position of the woman who was cheated on. Was she worth this mess? I need you.

See: Fortnight, Fresh Out the Slammer, loml

[watermelonsugacry]

I’m so curious to how ur going to do loml since the lyrics are in past tense👀👀👀😥

Building Harry's House: Love Of My Life

A/N: i'm sorry this one came out late but ficmas day 3 is here! tysm for your patience lovies! i love you all so much!

SUMMARY: With the world knowing of their once secret relationship, Harry and YN navigate life together as an official couple and everything that comes with it. (3.5k)

GENRE: 1dbandmember!yn

SINCE 2010 MASTERLIST // Building Harry's House masterlist // previous song here! 🇬🇧

—2013—

“And over there—right up against that weird lookin’ tree—is where I had my first kiss,” Harry points to the path of trees near a stream of water. 

It was the first time in months since the band has had a break long enough to go see their families. It’s been nonstop with writing and recording a new album, interviews left and right and performing in a different city every night. 

So with the extra time they’ve spent with their families, Anne was insistent on inviting Penny and YN over for so much needed family time. 

While the mums and other family members sat around the kitchen table and chatted the morning away (and told embarrassing stories about their children), Harry leaned over to his bandmate’s ear and whispered, “Wanna take a walk?”

He tried not to get too excited when she quickly accepted his offer with a small nod of her head with a breathtaking smile.

“Bet it was pretty steamy, huh?” YN teases as she playfully bumps her shoulder with his.

“Definitely above the PG-13 rating, m’sure,” Harry tucks his chin into his chest as he smiles at the sound of her giggle. “Yeh know, sometimes when I walk around here by myself, I feel like I’m six again.” 

With that, YN breaks into another fit of giggles when Harry suddenly and dramatically lays down in the middle of the field, limbs spread out beside him like he’s making a snow angel without the snow. 

YN plops down to lay beside her band mate and she closes her eyes with a sigh. It's been such a long time since they've all had a break from their hectic schedules that it felt amazing to simply pause.

“Harry? Can I ask yeh something?" She keeps her gaze above to the overcast sky, her favorite type of weather, and when she hears him hum in response she continues, "Have yeh ever been in love?”

She's not all that sure as to why she suddenly asks her question. It's just one of those times when she feels comfortable enough to ask her best friend anything. She's lost count of the number of times they've stayed up till the early hours of the morning talking about anything and everything that comes to mind: how to came to love music, who were their first crushes, what might have they been doing if they weren't in the band (a scary thought that they only entertained for a brief moment).

“Yes. I’ve actually been in love my whole life it seems,” He decides to answer truthfully. When he turns his head to meet her gaze, Harry’s eyes flicker back and forth with hers. “England is my soulmate, I think. I know every crook and cranny of this place. I’m in love with the view, the feel, the smell of it here. When I get older, I’ll probably buy a house here.”

YN smiles and turns her face to the greenery around her, letting out a soft chuckle, “That’s beautiful, Harry.”

Was it silly for her heart to sink a tiny bit when he didn’t say he was in love with her? She surely couldn’t have expected for her nineteen-year-old friend to be in love with anyone at the moment, let alone her out of all people. 

If she only knew that he was stupidly in love with her since he was merely sixteen years old...

“Have you?”

“Have I whot?” She challenges, already knowing what he’s asking yet too scared (and embarrassed) to answer him so quickly.

“Y’know what I mean,” He gently pushes an elbow to her arm. “Have you ever been in love?”

“I don’t think so...” YN pinches her eyebrows together, feeling his eyes burn into the side of her head. “Nevermind, I take that back. I have and I am.”

“Really?” Harry asks in disbelief, trying desperately to hide his disappointed tone. “Do I know the lucky lad who stole your heart?”

“Yup,” When she turns to head to meet his eyes, she gives him a cheeky smile before touching her chin to her shoulder, “S’me.”

She laughs at the playfully disappointed shake of his head, “‘Course it is.”

She only laughs harder, clutching her stomach when he gives a wistful push of her head. Although he must admit, he’s utterly and wholeheartedly relieved at her answer. 

—2020—

“M’not gonna let you pack my house up all by yourself. That’s what professional movers are for, darling.” 

Harry’s voice comes from the bathroom connected to the master bedroom. YN sits with her legs criss crossed on his bed, fidgeting away at the rings scattered along her fingers. 

Harry’s packing some of his stuff as he prepares to head over to LA to start filming his new movie Don’t Worry Darling. He’s going to be staying there for a couple of weeks while she'll stay back a few days to help pack and sell his beloved London house.

Harry and YN both lay on the couch together in her home in LA. She lays on her side, her back towards the back of the couch with Harry resting his head in the crook of her left arm while she holds and reads her book with the other. His arms are wrapped around her middle section with their legs tangled out in the rest of the couch. 

While Harry naps, YN has been gently carding her fingers through his hair and massaging his scalp. She’ll occasionally retrieve her hand away in order to turn the pages of the book.

"Hi, baby," YN gives him a soft smile as she continues to massage his scalp. An action that has him humming back in satisfaction with a sleepy smile of his own.

"Hi," He mumbles still in his sleep-induced state. As he snuggles further into her, he kisses her shoulder before digging his face into the crook of her neck. 

YN suddenly gets deja vu at this, well more like deja vu in reverse when the two were merely nineteen years old and she couldn't seem to take a well-needed nap in an airport private waiting area. When Harry offered her his arm to cuddle into him, she was hesitant as she's never done something like that before, let alone be fond of physical touch in general.

But she was desperate to fall asleep and he eased her into it, letting her come to him and adjust herself close to him as she saw fit. The two teenagers were woken up not even an hour later and found themselves cuddled like a couple. Her face was snuggled deep into the crook of his neck while his arms were fully and securely wrapped around her. 

It was the first of many late night cuddles and the first of her baby steps into becoming more physically affectionate—well at least toward Harry, but growth nonetheless. He's shown her so many things and has exposed her to aspects of life she'd never even thought to dream of. If someone were to tell her 10 years ago that she'd be officially in a relationship with Harry, cuddled up with him on her couch, falling head over heels in love with him, she would have laughed in their face and told them to fuck off before her knees going weak at the thought of their life together.

But out of everything he's been able to guide, teach, and show her things about herself, the one that sticks out the most is to let her feel her emotions. For far too long, she has suppressed her true feelings; whether that be keeping on her media-trained mask during nasty interviews, holding on to the truth about her father for so many years, or her deep love for her band mate. In more ways than she can possibly count, he's made her comfortable enough to say what she wants to say and feel her love even if it makes her uncomfortable at first. Maybe that's why she says what she wants next without giving it a second thought.

“Move in with me.”

YN feels his breathing on the column of her neck come to a pause. She can tell that it takes him a second to process her words in his sleepy state as he lifts himself up a bit to be able to fully look at her, “What?”

“I want you to live here. With me. Officially,” Harry just continues to blink up at his love with his slightly puffy eyes from his nap. “I mean unless you don’t want to, of course. That’s completely alright if yeh don't. I was just thinking,” He raises himself up on his elbow, a smirk forming on his lips. 

Harry leans up over her and presses his lips to hers, silencing his girlfriend of her rambles.

“Yes,” He says against her lips. "I wanna be your official roomie," Harry smiles at the giggle that bubbles past her soft lips. He wonders if he's still asleep or living in a daydream of some sort, “I love you, YN.”

“I love you more, Harry.”

“I adore you.”

“Don’t make me take back me offer.”

“I just want to help pack the small stuff then. Don’t like the idea of people snooping around your things.” 

Harry’s head peaks out of the doorframe and he gives her a pointed look, “Really?”

“Whot?” 

“Whot?” Harry teases back. “What’s the real reason you want to do it y’self?”

“It’s just," YN mindlessly draws random shapes on the comforter with her finger, "That house has a lot of memories in it. Memories that we made together. Whether when we were ‘together’ or not. I at least want to help in saying goodbye to it s'all.”

“Aw, baby. Why are you getting all sentimental about a house? M’right here.”

“Don’t patronize me,” She laughs, swatting his hands away from her face. “You don’t feel sad about leaving a place you lived in for so many years?”

Harry gives his love a gentle smile at her words. He pads his way over to her and makes himself comfortable next to her on the bed.

“Well, before I didn’t. Remember how I told you that I didn’t even really live in it until you, honestly. And, yeah I am kind of sad to leave it because we’ve made a lot of memories in her but,” The dimples begin to dig into his cheeks in a smile, “I think my excitement and happiness outweigh the memories we’re gonna make over there. We’re officially going to be living together. No more sleepovers. No more having to live without something we forgot back at our own homes. And all those memories are gonna live and stay in m’heart, not in these four walls. And I don’t see us leaving London indefinitely. We still got our seasonal home here that we can go back to whenever you want.”

“S’just, I remember yeh saying how England was your soulmate. The love of yeh life and all tha’, you know?”

Harry tilts his head to meet his shoulder in a shrug, “S’just coordinates to me now.”

As scary as it might seem, it surprises the two of them at how truthful his words are. England has always been a safe space for Harry but as the years go by, he finds himself finding that same comfort—and then some—somewhere else; or someone else, more like. There’s no denying the fact that earlier that year at Jonny's place on New Years day shoved the couple into the public eye with the brightest spotlight either one has ever experienced before. With traveling for his job, Harry doesn’t know his land’s creases and ends as much as he used to; it's all a part of growing up, he guesses.

“[The album is] named after the Japanese pop pioneer [Haruomi] Hosono, who had an album in the ‘70s called Hosono House. I immediately started thinking about what Harry’s House might look like. It took time for me to realize that the house wasn’t a geographical location, it was an internal thing,” Harry smiles to himself at the thought of YN being his home. As cheesy as that sounds, it just feels wrong to picture another place in this world where he feels the most safe, the most secure, and the most loved. 

“When I applied that concept to the songs we were making here, everything took on new meaning. Imagine it’s a day in my house or a day in my mind. What do I go through? I’m playing fun music. I’m playing sad music. I’m playing this, I’m playing that. I have doubts. I’m feeling stuff. And it’s all mine. This is my favourite album at the moment. I love it so much.”

...

“Oi, what’s all this?” His love’s words make him turn around with a smile, his dimples digging into his cheeks at her attire. YN is currently rotating back into her dress phase and she’s wearing a long blue sundress with a slit up the side to deliciously show off her toned thighs—a dress that’s been one of her favorites (and his) as of late.

“M’taking you out somewhere.”

“Where? We can’t really go anywhere since everything is closed,” YN wittily points out since they’re in the middle of a global pandemic and travel is very limited.

“Does a date have to be at a restaurant?” He playfully challenges her with a rise of his eyebrows as she approaches him, swerving past all the cardboard boxes scattered on the ground and eyeing the picnic basket on the counter in front of her boyfriend.

“Oh so it’s a date?” Her eyebrows pinch together with a playful shake of her head when he gives her a hum of agreement. “And what’s the occasion? An anniversary m’not aware of? That’s make me a bad girlfriend if it was.”

“Does there need—woman, just let me take you out on a date. Don’t make this overly complicated.”

“I’m a woman. It’s practically in me nature to make things ten times more complicated than they need to be. Or the other way around. Depends on the situation—”

“For fucks sake, baby just go get yeh shoes!” Harry huffs out a laugh, grabbing onto her shoulder and turning her around himself, giving her a pat on her bum to aid her along the pink carpeted stairs. 

When he leads a confused YN past his yellow Ferrari, he basks in the way she lets out a surprised laugh at the two bikes he set up for them in the driveway. She lets him lead her down the concrete trails that lead to grassy ones near his home. She takes in the moment of riding her bike through the secluded area and briefly closes her eyes to feel the rare, warm London breeze on her face. After a couple of minutes of peddling through the greenery, they finally come to a stop. She looks around at what looks like a small garden. Trees keep the area closed off from the initial public eye as well as bushes upon bushes of roses. 

Harry doesn’t dismiss the way she lets out a breathy laugh once she’s gently placed her bike on the ground, reaching up to fluff her hair and look over her shoulder to her love, “I haven’t done that since I was a teenager.”

While he begins to set up a blanket and the food he brought, he fondly watches her walk around the bunches of flowers, plucking a few and bringing them to her nose. 

After sitting down to eat the small array of food and sipping on the bottle of red wine, the couple takes the time to enjoy their environment. The pandemic has caused the two to come down from their busy schedules the past ten years their careers have to offer them and do practically nothing. The time off has caused them to self-reflect more than they ever have before, making them look at their lives through a new lens of gratitude.

It makes them grateful for things they took for granted: the flexibility their careers have allowed them to have during this time, investing time in other relationships with their friends and family, and physically being with one another during this scary time in the world.

“It’s a bit exciting to be filming for that type of era,” YN gently swivels her wine glass as the red liquid inside swirls around the bottom. “I think the 50s are gonna suit you, babe. From what we rehearsed together, you’re gonna fookin’ nail it, m’sure.”

Harry mindlessly picks and twists at the grass there by his hands, “You think so?”

“Oh I know so,” She takes a sip from her glass after giving him a reassuring nod. “And you’re gonna have so much fun with it, too. Especially when yeh get on the set for the first time—like for Little Women—I was instantly transported into the 1860s. I was worried I would act too modern just because of how I normally act in me day to day, but the set pieces were just so cool and...”

As YN goes on talking about her experience in the acting world, Harry can’t keep his eyes off of her. Her natural beauty is incomparable to any of the women his past management team set him up with. Her hair was down and in its natural state where it seems like she’s pushing a curly lock of hair behind her ear every other minute. The tattoos scattered around the expansion of her arms complement her so well and they look exceptionally beautiful under the cloudy London sky. And her smile...he could talk about all the ways her smile manages to take his breath away every single time.

If he could stay here forever, he surely would without a second thought. 

"YN YLN?" The use of her full name captures her attention and she’s instantly drawn into his green gaze. He looks down and smiles to himself before continuing, “Knowing you for as long as I have, I’ve learned my lesson about how to approach things with you. I know you and I think you more than anyone how much I tend to jump in feet first and land in a bit too hard. I know we’ve wasted five years hiding our feelings, almost three years jumping back and forth between friends and something more, and not even a year into an official relationship with each other, but baby, I knew I wanted to marry you for about 10 years now. You’ve flipped my world upside down.”

YN’s breathing stops completely at the mention of marriage. Over the years, the two have playfully thrown around the idea of marriage, mentioning how they want to spend the rest of their lives together, but have never had a sit down conversation about it before. 

“Now, I don’t expect you to give me an answer right now. All I’m asking is for you to think about it, okay?”

“Think about what exactly?”

Harry hums out a soft smile. He gently takes her left hand in his and slides a makeshift ring on her finger made of grass blades and a small flower bud. 

“If y’wanna be my wife.”

As excited as she is for the potential of being his wife, his partner until the end of her days, it terrifies her to no end. If this were a perfect, fairy tale story, YN wouldn’t hesitate to say yes. She wouldn’t think twice about her answer and should be flailing herself into his arms, bringing herself to tears. 

But that’s not realistic for her. Harry’s right, he does know her. He knew that if he officially popped the question to her, if he brought out the ring he’s had for her since he was twenty-one years old and slipped it onto her finger, she would have had an anxiety attack. He knew that her mind would be racing a mile a minute and would not let her rest until she thought of everything her intrusive mind would allow before giving her peace. 

She loves him and wants to spend forever with him, so why can’t she say it?

Meanwhile, Harry almost wants to laugh. Not at her lack of response of her worrisome state of mind, but of how right he is. He silently watches as the gears in her mind pump oil—she’s physically here, but she’s mentally somewhere else. 

Knowing her like the back of his hand, he doesn’t interrupt her thought process but instead lifts her hand to press a gentle kiss to her knuckle, her shoulder and her cheek before getting comfortable on his back. 

I’ve always wanted to write a song about like home and loving England and all that kind of stuff. And it’s always kinda hard to do without being like ‘went to the chippy and I did this thing’”

“‘Love of My Life’ was the most terrifying song because it’s so bare. It’s so sparse. It’s also very much in the spirit of what Harry’s House is about: I wanted to make an acoustic EP, all in my house, and make it really intimate. And because of the circumstances, it was made very intimately; everything was played by a small number of people and made in a room. For this song in particular, YN and I made it in between my home in London and in her's in LA," Harry holds himself back from mentioning that it's not his home in LA as well but decides to leave that bit of information out for obvious reasons. "We produced it together and it's always that much more meaningful when it's her being the one that's playing on the record. To me, it’s everything. It’s everything I’ve wanted to make.” 

taglist:

@wobblymug @be-with-me-so-happily @ashtongivesmebutterflies @kiwiskiwiskiwi @darlingdesire @obsesseddd @hopefulwastelandcreation @cacapeepee @breezie-b00 @harrysfolklore @theekyliepage @sunshinemoonsposts @nervousspiderling @tbslonelyhes @tenaciousperfectionunknown @harrystylesrecs @certified-nalayak @itsjustsel @iknowyouthinkimbulletproof @gviosca @behindmygreyeyes @twobluejeans @allisonxmcu @theemeraldbutterfly @jean-love @marvellover-sam @b-reads-things @reveriehs @rach2602 @thurhomish @perrypughstyles @luvonstyles @mxltifxnd0m @teamspideyman @c00chiemonster @juiceboxrry @s8tellite @folklorehrry @illicithallways @claramllera @eunoiaax @hoya122 @nichmedder @sleutherclaw @gloriousmoneyrascalbiscuit @harianaswhore @teawithcyb0rgs @vrittivsanghavi @vc55bughead @futuristiccroissantlampsludge @onecrazydirectioner @valluvsu @itsgabbysblog @awkwardbisexuall @rosehel @sucker4angstt @isalove @diorchives @mrshiddlestyles02 @fdl305

[seeminglyranch87]

Taylor & Travis Timeline

February 2024 - part 1

February 4 - Taylor Swift cryptically changes her social media profile pics to black & white images sending us Swifties into a frenzy of "what does this mean?" & "Taylor is up to something!"

This is followed by her website going down - people investigate the error code and determine that this was done on purpose and that the letters "hneriergrd" spell "red herring" and 321 is a count down. Many fans expect the announcement of Reputation (Taylor's Version) others are wondering if she will announce the release of TS11?

What is Taylor up to ?????

Travis Kelce arrives in Las Vegas ahead of the Super Bowl. Travis will not be attending the Grammys due to his commitments with the Chiefs.

66th Grammy Awards - Taylor is nominated for 6 awards:

✨ Album of the Year ✨ Record of the Year ✨ Song of the Year ✨ Best Pop Solo Performance ✨ Best Pop Duo/Group Performance ✨ Best Pop Vocal Album

Taylor arrives at the Grammys in a white Schiaparelli gown (x)

Taylor Swift receives her 13th Grammy for Best Pop Vocal Album. Taylor uses the occasion to announce the release of her 11th studio album "The Tortured Poets Department" on April 19, 2024! (x)

Taylor is awarded the history making Album of the Year Grammy for her album "Midnights". This is the 4th time Taylor has received this award - the most for any artist in Grammy's history (x)

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A post shared by Recording Academy / GRAMMYs (@recordingacademy)

February 4 - Taylor releases the tracklist of The Tortured Poets Department in order to get ahead of leaks. Swifties are collectively floored by the track names.

TTPD Tracklist:

1. Fortnight (ft. Post Malone)

2. The Tortured Poets Department

3. My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toy

4. Down Bad

5. So Long, London

6. But Daddy I Love Him

7. Fresh Out the Slammer

8. Florida!!! (ft. Florence + the Machine)

9. Guilty as Sin?

10. Who's Afraid of Little Old Me?

11. I Can Fix Him (No Really | Can)

12. loml

13. I Can Do It With A Broken Heart

14. The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived

15. The Alchemy

16. Clara Bow

17. The Manuscript

February 5 - Travis likes NPR IG post (x)

February 6 - Travis Kelce attending pre Super Bowl promotion and being interviewed. He handles SO many questions about Taylor (x)

February 7, 8, 9, 10 - The Eras Tour, Tokyo Dome, Tokyo, Japan

Dear Reader (guitar) & Holy Ground (piano)

Eyes Open (guitar) & Electric Touch (piano)

Superman (guitar) & The Outside (piano)

Come in with the rain (guitar), You're on your own kid (piano)

February 10 - Taylor departs Japan to fly back to USA to attend the Super Bowl with Jet renamed (The football Era).

Ed Kelce speaks to People Magazine ahead of the Super Bowl (x)

Sirius XM Sports interview Andy Reid (x) and ask if Taylor is a distraction for Travis? Chiefs head coach Andy Reid replies

"...it's a tribute how [Taylor] has handled it, how Kelce has handled it. It hasn't been a distraction so there haven't been any problems with it... She loves the game and she obviously loves Kelce, I'm happy for both of them..."

February 11 - NFL Super Bowl LVIII, Allegiant Stadium, Las Vegas NV

Chiefs v 49ers

Travis up early and liking a post by Sportscenter where Shaq expresses his interest to meet Taylor (x)

Chiefs defeat 49ers 25 - 22 in a nail biting game that went to overtime. This is Travis Kelce's 3rd Super Bowl victory within 5 years.

Taylor is joined by Blake Lively, Ice Spice, her parents Scott & Andrea Swift, Travis' parents Ed & Donna Kelce, Jason & Kylie Kelce, Ashley Avignon, Austin Swift & girlfriend Sydney, Miles & Keleigh Teller, Aric Jones, Ross Travis & Lana Del Ray & others in a private suite at Allegiant Stadium, Las Vegas. She wears a corset top by an Australian designer, quite possibly a nod to her next tour stop...

Blake telling Taylor “He is going to win for you” (x)

Celebrating the Super Bowl win together!

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"Thank you for making it half way across the world, you're the best baby, the absolute best. Was it electric?" says Travis to Taylor

*take special note of the caption!

Post Super Bowl press conference (x) Travis is asked "Has any couple had a better week than Grammys to Super Bowl cleaning up?"

Taylor, Travis and their friends attend various after parties to celebrate the Chiefs win. The Chainsmokers play multiple Taylor Swift songs, including You Belong With Me (x) Travis and Taylor are spotted singing along together at Zouk Nightclub, Resorts World.

Taylor says "that was the most romantic thing that ever happened" and then Travis kisses her on the cheek (x)

Taylor posts a tiktok about the event...

There is lots of PDA (x)

Travis gives his jacket to Taylor (x) on their way into XS at Wynn Resort, Las Vegas to continue celebrating.

Travis and Taylor dance together when Love Story is played (x) (x) (x)

February 12 - CBS Sports air Travis Kelce Super Bowl Interview with Tracy Wolfson (x 1:35)

Tracy asks what it is like to have Taylor alongside him on this journey?

"It's been nothing but fun. We've both been learning about this lifestyle, knowing that I brought her into the football world. It's been an unexpected ride that I've just been having a blast with."

Travis also addressed fan conspiracies that the relationship is a fraud. "You're all crazy," he said with a laugh. "Every last one of you is crazy."

February 14 - the Chiefs post-Super Bowl win parade in Kansas City.

Go to previous update -> January 2024 Part 2

Go to next update -> February 2024 part 2

Return to the timeline

[obsessivelollipoplalala]

Queen + Adam Lambert in Philadelphia on October 18, 2023

Well, that was one of the best experiences of my life! These are my thoughts (pictures and videos will go in separate posts):

I loved how much the entire thing really was a production. It wasn't simply people standing there and playing/singing songs, you could tell every aspect of the show was well-thought-out with set pieces, costume changes, and basically a light show.

I sat in a section on the side that was pretty close to the stage. When they were performing on the main stage, I was able to see everyone pretty clearly, and Spike turned to us and told us to clap sometimes. When Brian and Adam went down the catwalk, their backs were to us. That meant Brian’s back was to us during LOML, but I got a clear view of the whole arena lit up with everyone’s phones. It was beautiful, and the people around us were commenting on how moving it was, too.

Let’s expand upon that: My sister isn’t even in the fandom, but even she said how beautiful LOML was, and how the whole show feels like an homage to Freddie even during the parts when he’s not explicitly mentioned. She said she had a cheesy moment where she was standing there while Adam sang “Who Wants to Live Forever” (which had beautiful rainbow lights), and she thought of Freddie and said to herself, “This is what it means for someone to live forever.” It really is. You really feel like you’re part of this experience of keeping Queen and Freddie alive, and people are so fucking stupid to accuse Brian and Roger of merely cashing in. Even my sister said they have enough money for 3 lifetimes, and are obviously doing it because they love it. Anyway, LOML was genuinely a moving experience, hearing Brian sing and to look out into a sea of lights, and towards the very end of the show, they played Freddie’s vocal call-and-response with the crowd from Wembley, and I did get emotional seeing how Freddie still had a crowd eating out of the palm of his hand +30 years after his death. It made me really wish he was still here.

Adam: You know, I didn’t dislike Adam before this, but my sister and I agreed that we have a newfound respect for him. He’s an incredible performer. When you actually hear him sing live for 2 hours, you realize what Brian means when he talks about Adam’s voice being a gift and everything. His voice was so strong and clear, not a single sour or weak note. These are notoriously difficult songs to sing, but he really nailed them. Adam is also a really charming, likable performer, too. He has fantastic energy and often comes off as very playful. He was delightfully campy as he applied powder and perfume in “Killer Queen.” You can tell he’s having the time of his life, and he took a moment to talk to the audience and say how lucky he is to be in his 10th year of performing with them. Also, his outfits were amazing. He wore glittery boots that looked 12 feet high lol

Brian and Roger: I always knew they were incredible musicians, but god, actually seeing them perform really drives it home. You do have this moment like, “…Damn, they’re really up there playing all of that.” My eyes kept going back and forth between watching Brian on stage, and watching the quick and intricate movements of his fingers up on the screen. 

Brian was wonderful during LOML, despite his back being to us. His voice was warm, and he told us to sing the song to everyone we’ve lost. “‘39” was fun. I loved his solo section. He was way up on a pedestal with a screen to make it look like he was standing on an asteroid, and bright, colorful planets descended from the ceiling and floated around him as he played a calmer melody. It was so lovely. Again, my sister isn’t in the fandom but after the show, she commented that while Roger doesn’t seem like a bad guy, there’s just something approachable, likable, and nice about how Brian came across on stage :’)

Roger was still great, too. I really don’t know where the fuck he finds the energy to still be that good at the drums in his 70s, and even though I don’t like “I’m in Love With My Car” as a song, it’s still objectively impressive to watch him sing and drum for it at the same time. With him and Brian, I can’t comprehend how they’re still doing this. I feel exhausted just from standing there and watching them lmao, but they’ve still got it in their mid 70s. You can tell this is just what they were born to do, and tbh watching how completely they throw themselves into a performance, and picturing them doing that night after night for several months on end on and off for like 15 years……yeah, I see why they had so many personal issues and their domestic lives fell apart lol. I’m not even trying to be mean, I just think something’s gotta give when you’re doing that kind of work, and that’s not even mentioning any harmful aspect of the rock ‘n’ roll party culture. Anyway, the point is that it’s crazy that they’re still able to do this and give it their all, and I’m so happy I got to see them do their thing.

Finally, Brian came out in a Philadelphia Phillies T-shirt during the encore, and my sister and I screamed lol

10/10. What a night. I think Freddie would be so proud to see his work not only being carried on, but how Brian and Roger (and their team, of course) are still adding things to the production to keep it all fresh and give it their 110%.

[tending-the-hearth]

The outsiders obc album: a review that is totally not biased or skewed due to the face that i’ve been listening to it nonstop since it came out two weeks ago

“Tulsa ‘67”

Goes insane over the first line of the song because it’s the same as the opening of the book

Since this song/story is being written after everything happens, ponyboy recognizing how hard his brothers work in the opening verse makes SO much sense

“That right there is my best friend in the whole world, johnny cade” idk what it is about this line but it just makes me so happy

But ponyboy pointing out that part of what makes a soc a soc is graduation parties actually makes me so sad because so many members of the gang ended up dropping out of school in order to work so of course they’d view graduating as a privilege they don’t have, and that plays so well into darry and pony’s last fight at the end of the show

“CAUSE WE’RE GREASERS” the silliest gang ever <3

It’s just such a good opening number, the beat and music is so entertaining

“Grease got a Hold”

JOSHUA BOONE YOU ARE THE DALLY EVER

Him constantly calling pony “little brother” is everything

The spelling section of the song is SO fun

“E is for effortless swagger” and soda uses ponyboy and johnny to hold himself up they’re his little brothers!!!

“Show us how it’s done, then, einstein!” soda and two-bit are best friends!!!!

Also daryl tofa absolutely killing it on the run of “you better run for your life”

You only really get this from seeing the song live, but darry keeps ponyboy away from the rest of the gang during his section of the song until he makes sure that ponyboy knows what being a greaser truly means, he is such a big brother

“I love you superman” ace ily ily ily kissing your cheeks

Again, not part of the soundtrack but the performance, but the moment where ponyboy gets the upper hand in his little play-fight with two-bit, and dally gets so excited and starts jumping up and down with the rest of the gang like they are siblings!!!

“Runs in the Family”

Darry loml i know you’re having an identity crisis but this song is such a vibe

“So i dropped out of school cause i had to earn a dollar” the little dance i do every time i hear this line

vibes to the song so i don’t have to deal with the emotions i get as a parentified older sibling identifying with this song far too closely

“Now i’m stuck between the role of a brother and a father” someone get this man a hug and some therapy PLEASE I’M BEGGING YOU

I always love a little bit of an unreliable narrator, so the audience hearing this song and knowing how much darry is struggling, meanwhile ponyboy is SO sure and SO positive that darry truly doesn’t care about him is absolute perfection

“Great Expectations”

This song literally made me cry my eyes out the first time i listened to it, and then seeing the staging for it during the show??? 

But also ponyboy acknowledging that darry had a future, and how he had to sacrifice that after their parents died, and understanding his struggle

Honestly there aren’t words to describe my love for this song, it’s so beautiful and well-written, and brody’s voice is just so fantastic

“Friday at the Drive-In”

Again, the beat of this song is SO good!!!

emma pittman’s voice is everything to me

The instrumental for this song is “grease got a hold” i’m losing my mind!!!

This song is also just such a fun, easy-going song, that it works at feeling slightly out of place with how fun and lighthearted it is, especially knowing what’s going to happen soon

"I Could Talk to You All Night"

CUTIE PATOOTIE ALERT

I never have viewed cherry and ponyboy as having romantic interest in each other (maybe ponyboy with a little crush on her, but they become friends post-book events), and this song is just so perfect with showing why they connect with each other, because they understand each other

Have i mentioned how much i adore musical!cherry??? 

“And we talked so dang much i didn’t even catch the end” i love how perfect the accents are in this show, it’s really satisfying lmao 

Cherry being the first one who’s ever truly listened to ponyboy my heart hurts

“Runs in the Family (Reprise)”

AHHHH THIS SONG

There’s just so much tension, and soda trying to be the middle man like always while darry is singing??? Painful

But also this song does such a good job at showing that it’s not even been a full year since the curtis parents died, so the boys are still grieving and processing, so it makes sense that this is a fight that’s happening

But ugh the way that the song ends with the slap???? Curled up sobbing

“Far Away from Tulsa”

I LOVE THIS SONG SO MUCH

I also really love how johnny joins in a little hesitantly, like he’s not sure if ponyboy wants him contributing, but then as soon as he starts he talks about having a little garden and reading stories

Now i’m thinking about post-book, the remaining outsiders gang turns the empty lot into a type of community garden in johnny and dally’s honor oh i’m going to be ill

“We’d be each other’s family, Pony, start this life anew” SOBBING MY EYES OUT JOHNNY KNOWING EXACTLY WHAT PONYBOY WANTS AND PONYBOY KNOWING WHAT JOHNNY WANTS THEY’RE THE PLATONIC SOULMATES EVER

God and then the song going into “great expectations” literal chills

“Run Run Brother”

Brody does Ponyboy’s panic SO perfectly you can feel his fear when he just keeps repeating “he stuck him in the back!”

Like he’s not freaking out about bob dying, he’s freaking out about the fact that johnny could get arrested

Mother hen Dally my beloved

“I hate to make you go” and “even though it kills me to say” those lines are everything, i love Dally just wanting to keep his little brothers close but knowing he needs to get them somewhere safe immediately

And the line “you’re a greaser now” getting repeated at the end???? I’m going insane, it doesn’t sound fun or happy anymore, it just sounds like a warning and almost like johnny and ponyboy are being taunted

“Justice for Tulsa”

Dally immediately calling out the cops for always going after the greasers and calling them his boys???? Obsessed with protective dally

Again, musical!cherry is everything to me, she doesn’t try to make excuses for what Bob did, she calls him and Randy out for drinking and ganging up on Ponyboy and Johnny, and calls Randy out for jumping Johnny the week before

Like in the book and movie she makes excuses and puts all the blame on johnny, but in the musical, even though she’s sad that bob’s dead, she understands why johnny did what he did, and doesn’t blame him for what happened

“Death’s at my Door”

Emotional damage

Jesus CHRIST the absolute slap in the face this song was during the show

Ponyboy blaming himself for everything??? Thinking he’s cursed because everyone he loves keeps dying or getting hurt??? Ouch???

But then johnny immediately jumping into reassure him and making sure ponyboy knows that he’s not alone??? They are the best friends ever???

I haven’t talked about how beautiful Sky’s voice is, if he doesn’t win a tony award i will riot

“The reason i’m living is you” SOBBING VIOLENTLY ON THE GROUND HEAVING AND HYPERVENTILATING

Johnny saying “i’ll never leave you alone” and it’s true even after he dies because he knows ponyboy will see him in the sunset that they always talked about and i’m going to go curl up in a corner for a little bit

“Throwing in the Towel”

Emotional damage part 2

Parentified older siblings how are we feeling about this song

Darry finally talking to his brother about how he’s feeling, and getting validation from Sodapop that what he’s been doing is being noticed and making a difference!!

But darry recognizing what Ponyboy can do and his potential and blaming himself for what happened and, like ponyboy, telling soda that he’d be better off without him

“I lost our brother and i lost my way” SOBBING VIOLENTLY ON THE GROUND PART 2

Darry is TWENTY in the books and never got a chance to truly mourn his parents it makes sense how much he struggles

Ponyboy joining in the song from the back of the set like it actually makes me want to bite something

Brent Comer how does it feel to understand darry like no one else <3333333

“Brother that’s what love is all about” JASON SCHHMIDT THE FACT THAT YOU WEREN’T NOMINATED FOR A TONY IS A CRIME

(they should have just nominated the entire cast for supporting or featured actor at this point tbh)

“Soda’s Letter”

Jason making me sob!!!!! 

“Ponyboy this house ain’t a home without you” this song just starts out punching you in the gut

Idk why but soda including “say hi to johnny for us” makes me emotional, like the curtis brothers love johnny as much as they love pony he is also their little brother!!!

Brent comer i will fight you for the end of this song

“Hoods turned Heroes”

DARYL AND JASON KILL THIS SONG ACTUALLY THEY’RE THE UNDERRATED DUO OF THIS SHOW

New hc because of this song is that Soda and Two-Bit are as close to each other as Pony and Johnny are

i love love love the "owe it all to Pony and Johnny" line, because they recognize what the two have been through, and also acknowledge that yeah, it's because of them that they're getting a little bit better of a reputation!

Also again, not part of the album, but the song is so hyped and excited and happy and then immediately gets cut by Dally walking onto the stage with Johnny wrapped in bandages and my heart BROKE

“Hopeless War”

Favorite change is cherry going to visit johnny in the hospital and that being where she and pony have their conversation

What i love about this song is that it isn’t cherry going “this is silly, you shouldn’t do this” it’s cherry realizing that what happened to johnny was never deserved, why the rumble is important, and knowing that it’s going to happen, but her also acknowledging, like ponyboy does, that it’s not going to change anything. 

I’m just so obsessed with emma’s voice and how she portrays cherry in the show

“Trouble”

I absolutely LOVE how aggressive and intense this song is, especially compared to “Hopeless War” coming right before it

I love “tonight” from West Side, and this song gives me those vibes, i love a good pre-rumble song

DARRY STILL LOOKING OUT FOR PONYBOY AND WANTING TO FIGHT FOR HIM 

PONYBOY TAKING THE “LET’S DO IT FOR JOHNNY” LINE

“Little Brother” 

Emotional damage part 3

The way the song starts out so soft and slow, and it building up and up as Dally becomes more and more worked up and looses it

“If anything were fair you would still be here” AND THAT’S THE POINT OF THE SHOW AND OF THE BOOK IT ISN’T FAIR THAT JOHNNY DIES IT’S FAIR THAT BOB DIES BUT JOHNNY DIDN’T DESERVE TO DIE AND IT’S THE REALIZATION THAT EVEN THOUGH JOHNNY COULD DO SO MUCH MORE HE STILL DIES AND LEAVES THE PEOPLE WHO LOVE HIM BEHIND

“Do it for Ponyboy, do it for Johnny Cade” THOSE ARE HIS BROTHERS YOUR HONOR

The way Joshua just screams the last “Johnny can you hear me now?” absolutely destroys me, the song itself is all over the place, and it makes sense because it’s Dally’s breakdown

“Stay Gold”

Emotional damage part 4

When i saw the show the instruments were really quiet while Sky was singing so all you could hear was him and then the sounds of people quietly sobbing and sniffling (it was me)

Going from “i have seen a pool of blood run crimson red” to “i have stared into a thankful father’s eyes” johnny going from taking a life to saving lives i’m losing my mind actually

Not to be annoying about them again but Brody and Sky’s voices literally melt together and their emotions are so beautifully portrayed as they sing, going from melancholy to joyful as Ponyboy starts to accept Johnny’s death

And “I have known a love that many never know, and our love lives on no matter where I go” IT’S ABOUT THE PLATONIC LOVE OF THIS GROUP AND THE LOVE PONY AND JOHNNY HAVE FOR EACH OTHER AND HOW FRIENDSHIPS ARE STRONGER THAN ANYTHING ELSE AND I’M JUST GOING TO CRAWL IN A HOLE AND DIE THEY’RE PLATONIC SOULMATES

Ponyboy having the last “Stay Gold” line 

“Finale (Tulsa ‘67)”

Darry reading the starting lines like Ponyboy did at the beginning of the show 

Ponyboy going from idolizing fictional heroes to looking at his brothers as his heroes because they’re the reason he’s going to be able to make it out of Tulsa????

Just the way he sings about how Darry is the toughest guy he knows, and how Soda is the heart and soul of the family, how earnest and loving he is when singing it

“Trying to look tough so they're not beaten down again” in connection to Dally makes me sob, him using the grease and toughness as a cover so he doesn’t get hurt again

And this reprise of the song just feeling so much lighter and happier, compared to the opening, when ponyboy was talking about how everything was unbalanced and the differences between the Greasers and the Socs, how he and his brothers were struggling, to the finale being so hopeful and encouraging, because Ponyboy’s had his realizations, he’s reconnected with his brothers, he’s accepted Johnny and Dally’s deaths, but he’s making a choice to keep going

And also at the end, where “We’re greasers” was repeated in the opening song, it’s now been changed to “Stay Gold” being repeated 

And the entire show ENDING with “Stay gold”???????

yeah i'm so so normal about this show i promise