#lollie-angst🫐

[willowwithaheart]

Angst to the max with Arlecchino x reader. Please make it established relationship. I would like the situation for reader to die after they had an argument

|| Death rattle.

|| pairing; Arlecchino x gn! Reader

|| summary; Arlecchino had helped you recover from a devastating attack on your family that forced you to leave Mondstadt. But one day, you find out that she's one of the reasons you had to run in the first place...

|| cw; ANGST, major character death, dark themes, unhealthy relationships, descriptions of people dying,

|| wc; 1.8k

|| note; DAMN anon. I was gobsmacked when I read this ask. You sure do love angst…

How long had she been lying to you?

Parading around, acting like she wasn't the whole reason hundreds of people were killed. Lying to your face.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” You sneered, face sticky with long-dried tears. “Why didn't you tell me?”

Arlecchino stood stiffly before you, cold gaze not wavering once. That was what you loved about her, originally. She had a good head on her shoulders and didn't let her emotions get to her. But now? Now, you knew–she was just a lying bastard good at keeping up a poker face.

“It was to protect you,” she spoke up, taking a single step towards you. Her footprints barely left a dent in the thick snow surrounding you, and you found yourself shuddering against your will. “Come inside, [Name]. It's cold.”

“No,” you answered, tugging your thin shirt closer to your body. Fuck this, you thought, I'd rather freeze than go with her.

“You're a harbinger,” you swallowed, and you weren't sure if you were shaking because of the cold or because of the sheer emotion coursing through every vein in your body. The cold nipped at your exposed skin, but somehow, it hurt less than the idea of your lover being the reason you had to run away from Mondstadt in the first place.

Arlecchino stayed silent.

“I told you- I told you everything that happened. I told you I hate the fatui for everything they've done. And you didn't think to tell me? What the fuck? What else have you been hiding?” You accused, jabbing a finger in her direction. It was so cold. Freezing, even. But for some reason, it felt better than being with her.

“You know I love you,” she started, slowly taking another step towards you, “and I only did this to keep you safe. If you knew, how would you have reacted?”

Oh, you found yourself thinking, what the fuck? So she decided to pin it on you? How on earth did she even hide it? Why didn't she answer your fucking question?

“I'm done. We're done. I can't fucking do this,” you muttered, taking a few steps backwards. She wasn't even reacting. How did you keep up with her for so long? How did you not notice your relationship had been built on lies?

“[Name], stop acting like this. I can explain everything. I really do love you, I promise,” Arlecchino insisted, and you would've thought she was begging if you didn't know any better. She was ordering you. Like a fucking dog.

“No. No, I'm sorry. I need to leave. I need a break.”

Again, she didn't react. At least, you didn't think she did. You could barely see through the tears clouding your vision, hot against the crisp winter air. Snowflakes slowly descended from the sky, and you wished you could have stopped to appreciate the scenery more before walking away.

Arlecchino didn't follow. She stayed still, almost rigid in place, watching you leave but unable to do or say anything.

Part of her was almost shocked. Another was disappointed. And something deep inside her was screaming: “I knew this would happen.”

You'd come back. Surely, you'd come back. This would be just like all the other arguments you'd have in the past. You'd storm off, have some time to yourself, and then the two of you would make it up to each other. That was how it always worked.

And yet, something told her this time was different.

–

The cold wrapped around you like claws ensnaring you in a dangerous trap.

Your breath came out as puffs of steam against the harsh winter air. You hadn't quite adjusted to the climate of Snezhnaya, and for once, you realised–you were all alone.

All these years, you had entirely relied on Arlecchino. Well, you didn't have anything, now did you?

After you were forced to flee Mondstadt, leaving your family and belongings behind, you had nothing. No money, no food, barely any clothes, no one to trust.

And then she found you.

Her, with her harsh, commanding gaze and deadly authority that made a shiver run up your spine when she met your gaze. “Are you alone?” She would ask, “do you have somewhere to stay?”

And you, being the foolish, desperate person you were–you answered.

“T-The Fatui–” you gasped, grasping onto the material of her thick coat. She didn't push you away. “They…they took everything. I had to run. I-I don't…”

You didn't know what kind of expression you had on your face. All you could remember was the feeling of hot tears spilling over, and how terrifying it was to realise–your family was gone. Everything was gone.

And Arlecchino–who was a woman of very few words, but you liked to think she had a soft spot for you–helped you back up to your feet. She did so much more than that. She gave you a home, a steady income, something to live for.

But now? Now you knew she was one of the reasons you were at rock bottom in the first place. And it fucking hurt.

The cold didn't seem nearly as bad as that realisation. Nor did the hunger, or the exhaustion dragging you down as you ran and ran and ran until you couldn't remember why you were running in the first place.

You could barely even think straight. The air was nipping at your exposed skin, and each desperate drag of breath felt like it was cutting up the insides of your lungs. Tears stung at the corners of your eyes.

You loved Arlecchino. The snow crunched beneath your boots. You could feel the cold seeping through your clothes. You didn’t know where you were.

You loved her, you really did. Was that a cave in the distance? Maybe you could stay there for a while. Just for a little while. You were so tired…and sore…and cold.

With your whole being, really. You dragged a hand against the jagged rocks of the cave, covered in a thin layer of snow. It made you shudder.

She saved you, in a way. It was dry inside the cave. It was still cold, but really, did you care? Did you have anything to lose?

But she also cursed you. You circled around the cave, pacing back and forth. You couldn’t feel your legs.

Love was one hell of a curse.

You paused, pressing your lips into a thin line. Your gaze stayed stuck to the ground, as if you’d see her if you looked up.

“It’s okay, baby, it really is,” a voice rang in your head. One you tried so hard to forget. One that purged your dreams and haunted your waking thoughts, always creeping in the back of your mind.

Behind your eyelids, you saw the splatter of blood on a once pristine wooden wall. You heard a gasp—a death rattle. A haunting sound consisted of someone’s last breath, all the air being pushed out of their lungs as they fought for their life.

Death rattle. Like a snake, you thought. A sound that shook you to your very core, that sent a jolt of fear down your spine which urged you to run. But what were you running from? You’d been running for so long. You’d been cold for so long.

You were on the floor. Since when were you on the floor? Why were you so dizzy?

Why did your head hurt?

But oh. Oh, it was warm. It was lovely, feeling the warmth ooze from your head and spread to the rest of your body. You felt a dull throb. Was that warmth?

You found yourself calling out to your mother. But she was gone, wasn’t she? She felt so close. Just out of reach. Just like the day you lost her, the day you saw the light leave her eyes and heard her take her last, shuddering breath.

How did she die? You couldn’t remember.

You remembered the fatui had something to do with it.

Something like…an argument. A heartbreak. Someone was running until they could barely breathe. Why did you know all of this?

Oh. You remembered now.

Something caved her skull in.

No…wait. Was that her?

Was that her or…was it you?

You couldn’t make sense of anything. Were you dying? Were you already dead?

You felt so safe. So warm. So peaceful. If you died right now, would you really mind? You were happy here. At least…at least it was you.

A faint memory played in the back of your mind. Was it a memory? You weren’t sure. A small child was laughing.

His eyes crinkled at the corners, a big, goofy grin on his face, showing all of his missing teeth and the joy only a child could have. He hadn’t yet learned to hate his smile. He hadn’t yet learned that the world really was a terrible place.

His hands were warm in your own. He sounded so happy, warm eyes gazing up at you as he regarded you with a nickname only he used.

You couldn’t remember his name. You couldn’t remember who he was, but oh, how you loved him. You loved him like your own child. You remembered being oh-so proud of him.

But…what happened? You couldn’t remember. But you were sad.

So, so sad. It was like a pit had opened up in your chest, caving in on itself and eating up the peace you felt so strongly until now. Something was wrong.

He must be alive. You couldn’t remember his death.

So, then…were you sad because…of your own death? But it was so peaceful. So quiet. You were so glad it wasn’t him.

Maybe you were just confused. Maybe you were just tired. If you closed your eyes, you’d probably wake up right next to him. Yeah. You’d wake up. Of course you would.

You closed your eyes.

—

White hair was ruffled by the wind. It was cold, seeping into her very scalp.

But it was so much better than the sight before her, even if her face betrayed her true feelings.

Blood seeped into the expensive leather of her boots. She didn’t care. It was yours, after all. All yours.

Her fingers twitched at her sides. You didn’t move. How could you? You were likely long gone.

Long gone. The thought made something stir in her chest. You were gone.

What if she’d gotten there sooner? What if she didn’t let you leave in the first place? You’d be upset, but you’d still be here. You’d still be in front of her. Your blood wouldn’t be soaked into her boots.

Oh, but…you were smiling.

You were happy. Peaceful. At least, she hoped. She hoped you’d spent your last moments not in fear or anger but in peace. It was all you deserved, especially for putting up with her for so long.

Arlecchino turned away, brows furrowed and lips pressed into a thin line. She knew you’d hate her for it, but she didn’t let herself cry.

You were happy. You had to be.

After all, you had a smile on your face.

|| note; fun fact! A death rattle is a very real thing. Reader did, in fact, hear their mother make a death rattle. But that only happens when someone is choked to death. The blood splatter on the wall was the kids. Reader was very confused in their moment of death, and since they didn’t see the kids death first hand, they assumed it didn’t happen. Don’t worry, they reunite in the afterlife :)

|| disclaimer; please don’t copy, translate or repost my work without credit.

[willowwithaheart]

Masterlist!

|| willowwithaheart; welcome to my blog! Links may not be added yet. If something isn’t here, feel free to send a request or post a comment! Criticism and feedback is welcome and appreciated!

Fandoms Masterlist!

-My Hero Academia Masterlist

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|| current obsessions; Blue Lock and Gokurakugai!

|| disclaimer; some fandoms may not have a link yet—this is either because I have not yet written anything or haven’t had the time to add a link yet. Check out the tags at the bottom of this post if you want to see a specific fandom.

I am NOT comfortable writing…

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|| disclaimer; if a request makes me uncomfortable, I will not answer it. Please do not send another request if I have not answered yours. I will either answer it eventually, or not answer it at all.

I AM comfortable writing...

-Yandere

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Important!

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Tags!

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#lollie-thoughts🫐 for small things I may or may not work on in the future! Also find polls there!!

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|| disclaimer; please do not translate, copy, or repost my work without credit.