#lol remember when i said post-episode essays weren't gonna be a regular thing

[everlastingday]

one thing i love about the show is how it shows unconditional love, especially when it comes to parents/children. it's aspirational, heartwarming, and it's good escapism.

BUT i just want to put a gentle and loving reminder for anyone who needs it that it is, at the end of the day, fictional. i come from a more traditional/conservative culture, and in that respect, i see a lot of myself in both carlos and marjan. that need to earn the respect of your parents/family, to gain their approval, to never want to go against your elders, is so deeply ingrained into me.

so on one hand, i love seeing these characters work through these struggles on screen - marjan in this last episode, and carlos throughout seasons 2-4. i love seeing them opening up, standing their ground, and becoming more vulnerable with these authoritative figures in their lives. i love seeing their courage to open up be rewarded with complete acceptance, love, and respect.

but sometimes, i do have to remind myself that this just isn't the reality for a lot of people, including myself. we can open up all we want and still never get the responses that we want from our parents. and i don't mean to say this in a discouraging or condescending way (and i apologize if it comes across that way), but more just to reiterate that if you don't get your parents' approval and recognition, that is okay too.

i think it's natural to want it, and it's okay to want it, but you do not need it. just know that if your real life does not play out the way these fictional stories do, it doesn't mean you've failed, or that you could've done something differently to get a different result. it just means that these are fictional stories, and yours is real.

all that to say, if you are someone who has not been able to receive validation from the people you need it most from in your life, i see you, and you are not alone.