#lmfao started feeling insecure in my writing

[dcwnrisen-aa]

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[ughdontbeboring]

pain relief

Austin Butler x WoC Reader (can be read by anyone)

Reader is trying to hide her chronic pain from her man

warnings: chronic pain (migraines), insecurities, smutty

THIS FOR ALL MY CHRONIC PAIN GIRLIES!!

notes: WOW even with all the Austin wips in my notes this is my first one to be posted, wow idk makes me nervous 😅 yall I hope I did our sweet boy justice.

No description of ethnicity one comment of complexion that’s it but reader when I write is always written with myself in mind. It’s soooo self indulgent.

this is SUPER self indulgent, So I first thought of this from his interview with Jimmy Kimmel when they asked about the migraines as an excuse not to have sex and of course his response was spot on he said “I don’t know what a migraine is” and Jimmy said “of cour you don’t” lmfao bc idk if I’d even turn him down if I had one!

I had a really bad period of back to back migraines for a couple months and this is what my brain rewarded me with in between one. I really don’t know what this is yall lol so don’t ask idk if I’m actually happy with it but yea lol

I put x reader but idk I guess it can tell be read that way, I don’t have the energy to re write it y’all so

now that I’m starting to feel better I will be catching up on my other wips.

if you like it, love it, fuck with it leave some love. I DO NOT give permission for my shit to be used anywhere by anyone.

🤕

Don’t focus on the pain, don’t focus on the pain she repeated over and over again in her head from under the safety of the soft cool cotton comforter as if it would keep away the pounding pain, protect her from it. 

It would not. 

Even with the house dead silent, the fan on for a little noise and all the black out curtains drawn that her boyfriend insisted he buy when he learned about her diagnosis from childhood- she knew relief would not find her. She shifted trying to readjust and find a more comfortable position to lay in, the little pocket above her head letting much needed cool air into her little bubble. 

She knew a few weeks ago she should have reached out to her neurologist but she’d just been so busy it kept slipping her mind and the aspirin had been holding her over but this? no this one was a monster and it was full peak right now. It started almost a day ago after the LA screening for The Bikeriders and had not gone away.

It didn’t help that they also just got back from the UK press tour. All the flying, the red carpets, the flashing lights and noise was starting to take its toll. Recently her boyfriend of just a little over a year revealed to her how much he enjoyed having her accompany him and how he loves sharing those moment with her. Hence all the traveling she’d done recently at his side. 

They still believed in healthy space but they truly enjoyed being together as much as they could. 

Usually she’d fly out every 2 or so weeks to wherever he was since her job was more flexible, their relationship was long distance since she was still living in New York. Which they’d also discussed changing that status but they both agreed to iron out the plans once the tour was over and he had a few weeks of down time. They figured the actual move would happen after he filmed in NY the end of summer. Knowing summer was her favorite time to be home, ever the thoughtful boyfriend. 

Though she was nervous to tell her family. They adored Austin but they’re a very close family and not seeing them everyday would take a lot of time to adjust to but it was important at this point in their relationship to actually be together. He even mentioned he’d love to look for a New York apartment which she had thought was unnecessary they could just stay with any of her family members when they visited until he reminded her she wouldn’t want her family to know she was his pretty girl who got cock drunk and loud when he fuck her stupid. Yes their own place was necessary. 

She felt a sharp pain at her temple and groaned. It was like her brain was telling her to stop thinking about all the stress and think about the pain she was in, which she didn’t want to do either honestly. She wish she could sleep it off but it was impossible. 

She flipped her pillow to the cool side and once again tried to empty her brain. Deep breaths girl deep breaths, the pain isn’t forever. 

She heard the front door slam shut up, which made her curl up even more in a fetal position and the deep smooth voice of her favorite person calling out to her. That voice was her favorite in the whole world but right now she needed silence. She had hoped the migraine would have been over by the time he got back but she wasn’t so lucky. Now she would have to face the music.

She had been telling him the past couple weeks it was just little headaches nothing serious, he knew she got migraines but hadn’t experienced any with her so far. The past 2 years she hadn’t needed to be medicated, the doctor couldn’t tell her why they suddenly stoped and why she was only getting little headaches every once in a while. This is why she was so unprepared and completely out of her medication she hadn’t needed in so long; she truly thought they had finally stopped for good. 

She couldn’t have been more wrong with the pain that was throbbing in her head. The front of her skull a constant ache and the back at the base of her skull and neck a wicked throbbing. The pain in her neck and shoulders unbearable even right between her eyes a sharp pain. She felt like she was dying. The fatigue of the attack her body was under was starting to catch up to her. She was trying to hold back the tears but the sound of boots pounding up the stairs along with the call of baby had her on the verge of a tearful melt down. 

She wanted to avoid the conversation that would surely come after this, when he would witness her in a peak migraine state. She felt horrible because she knew he’d feel like it was his fault for encouraging her to come with him to all the press events but it wasn’t his fault. 

She was an adult and she should have addressed this weeks ago with him and her doctor when the headaches started and not try to hide it to avoid worrying him. 

She should have been honest and though she has no reason to be she was scared to tell him.  She was scared he may think she wasn’t able to handle this kind of life. What if he wanted someone who didn’t need to recharge so often? Or someone who could just do anything with him at anytime not be laying in a bed sometimes for more then a day in pain and grumpy. Someone who couldn’t be touched in this state or be the prefect girlfriend. 

She also knew she sounded ridiculous that wasn’t who Austin was but it didn’t stop the insecurity she had about her migraines and how they held her back from life sometimes. Held her back from being fully emerged into his lifestyle. The guilt wrecked her. 

She knew she was mostly feeling insecure about her migraines because of those comments. She wasn’t normally insecure but recently she had read some comments which usually don’t bother her, about her and Austin’s relationship and how unhappy she looked being on press tour and if she was so unhappy why not just leave so he could be with someone who was happier with him. Those people obviously ignored the photos that were not taking at events that showed how happy they were but not knowing or they probably didn’t care she couldn’t be happier than she was, she was just suffering from more frequent migraines. 

So of course they’d focus on the bad, not all the fans but some. A lot of fans, who she felt were real fans could simply see how happy Austin seemed again. She knew how that felt, she met Austin as a fan and all his relationships and flings after Vanessa seemed lackluster and without any real connection, so she got it. But some of the comments were really getting to her at this moment. Especially the ones about how he looked happier with Kaia (which she knew was a lie from hell, she heard all about that relationship from Austin, his last ex) and then the ones about Vanessa looking happy ALL the time, which was funny because Austin spoke to her about their relationship also and if fans only knew it wasn’t always perfect, yes they loved each other but still there was a lot of hurt in that relationship for Austin. 

Then when those things would pop up she’d think what she’d say to her mans ex’s if she ever met them or if she’d just ignore them. 

Her head throbbed hard from all the unnecessary thinking and stress she was bringing onto herself, things she normal never paid any mind when the bedroom door swung open. 

Baby? He called again, steps coming to a slow stop halfway into the room when she assumed he noticed the state of the room; all the curtains drawn, the TV and lights all off, no noise but the fan she placed near the bed even though the central air was on and the pile of blankets on the bed covering her balled up body. Not a single part of her visible as she quickly stuck her hand out the air pocket at by her head careful to not let any light in and weakly waved at him. She could hardly speak let alone move her head to acknowledge him anymore. 

“Baby you still in bed? It’s 10” He asked as he walked closer, not that he cared it was just unusual for her and caused a bit of concern to form in the pit of stomach. 

He watched the head or he’s assuming area of the blanket shake in a yes motion. Even with the black out curtains there was still just enough light to make out everything in the room. 

“Baby what’s wrong” he asked in a soft voice from the edge of the bed, his hand running gently up and down some part of her body under the blanket. Her body coiled away from his touch. He tried to shake away the slight sting it caused him.

“uh migraine” she whispered weakly, if he wasn’t mistaken he could hear the underlying embarrassment in her tone. What could she be embarrassed about? 

“Oh shit baby, you need anything? Anything I can do?” He genuinely asked in gentler tone, though she couldn’t see how his eyes soften knowing she was probably in an immense amount of pain. 

He felt useless. 

“Uh no, just gotta be left alone for a while” this time there wasn’t any embarrassment in her tone just guilt. 

Austin tried to school his own face and tone of disappointment. He know he couldn’t do anything truly to make it go way but he wanted to help, wanted to be there for her like she’d been there for him on all his overwhelming days and nights from filming and traveling. His sweet girl deserved that. Then he thought back to this one thing he’d came across when he was reading online about migraines when she first told him she got them pretty frequently in the past. He quickly dismissed that idea, a slight blush creeping up his neck, he felt a little embarrassed himself for even thinking to suggest that, who says that to their partner Austin? He thought. She clearly needed to be alone. 

“Ok I’m just head downstairs then, call me if you need anything”  

He took another moment eyeing her blanket fortress before turning and slowly heading Towards their bedroom door.

“Austin?” He heard her call shyly, her voice still muffled from the layers covering her.

“Yea?” His own tone was laced with curiosity.

“Uh…there…there is one thing you could probably do for me…if you don’t mind..if you do it’s ok-“ 

He was quick to be at her side, slipping out his shoes, ready for whatever. His stomach burned a little thinking she may ask what he thought of just briefly a moment ago.

“Anything” 

He watched her baby blue fresh set of nails slip from under the blanket and her hand reaching out for his. His own large hand was in hers before he even registered it moving. She tugged him lightly, his body following gently. He was careful not to touch her as he laid next to her, his chest near where her head was, he remembered her saying how she didn’t like to be touched when she was having an episode, everything felt more intense and for some reason it usually amplified the pain. 

“Can I use your hand for a while?” She asked shyly still under the safety of the blankets, he could hear her clearer through the hole she left at the top. 

He felt guilty at the blood that rushed his cock.

“Of course” He said squeezing the right hand that held his left one. 

He allowed her to maneuver his hand so that his left hand was under her head, she placed his fingers at the base of her skull, thumb on one side and his fore finger and pointer finger on the left side.

“Can you keep your fingers like this and apply as much pressure as you can? This are some of my pain points and the right kind of pressure can ease the pain a little, usually I tie a scarf but it isn’t always helpful” she mumbled weakly. 

He was confused. 

“Oh ok..I..I thought-“ 

This wasn’t something he read, though he seen something about heat compress. He was confused because he thought she was going to ask for his hand to give her an orgasm. That was something interesting that he had came across. It said it didn’t work for everyone hence why he was slightly embarrassed to suggest it, he didn’t want her to think he was only thinking with his dick. 

He applied the pressure anyway, happy to help anyway he could.

“Is that good baby?”

“You can press a bit harder” 

He did as she said, feeling her body adjust just the tiniest bit next to him. A soft sigh leaving her lips.

She soft voice thanked him. He hummed a response, his own body adjusting slightly to get more comfortable.  He would lay here as long as she needed.

After a few minutes of comfortable silence, she called his name.

“Yea?” He asked feeling more tired himself than what he thought he was when he got home.

“What were you going to say? When I asked for your hand?” She replied softly voice full of the need for sleep.

His felt that fire and a blush come back. He chuckled to himself. Now was good as anytime to confess his unconventional suggest and figure out if it was something helpful to her or if it was something she even heard of before. 

“Uh..I..I had been reading about migraines when you first told me you got them, trying to understand them better-“ He was cut off by a whimper she made, a pitiful sound of endearment. He knew what she was thinking, she was taken back by his willingness to be there for her however he could and that meant trying to understand what she would be going through. He kept going. “And I was reading how orgasms can sometimes help temporarily, but I didn’t want you to think I was just thinking with my dick” he concluded softly. Feeling better about just getting it out and in the open, it didn’t feel so dirty anymore, like he was taking advantage somehow. He knew her better than to think she would think that but it didn’t stop his insecurities about the topic. 

He felt her body stilled.

shit was she mad at him? He felt the slight unease creep into his stomach and his insecurities intensify at the thought that she would be mad at him for suggesting such a thing when he noticed her right hand slip from under the covers. 

Her soft palm facing up and open in a silent question and permission, are you still willing? And of course you can touch me. 

He let go of the breath he didn’t know he was holding and gave her his right hand, her soft fingers gently pulled his under the covers, her forearm resting ontop of his own as she slipped his hand under hers to be guided where he couldn’t see. Once his rough fingers tips ghosted over her wet pussy he didn’t need anymore guidance, he knew her too well, maybe better than she knew herself. 

She gasped at the first touch and her hand left his to grip his forearm, as he’d started to explore her wet folds.

“How are you this wet already sweet girl? Hmm? Just can’t help yourself around daddy?” Austin questioned softly from above her, awe clear in his voice. He stayed laid on his left side, careful his body other than his hands didn’t touch her. 

“Fuck” she groaned quietly from under the blankets. “Guess my body always needs you daddy” she moaned out. He groaned as his fingers applied more pressure and speed. 

He felt the twitch in cock as she coated his fingers and moaned softly and weakly. His fingers switching between slow and quick. He was so painfully hard. He had to stay focus this was about her but how could he when her tight wet warm pussy was calling him? Begging for him. Her body was hardly moving just her hips grinding slowly into him.

Even fully covered by a ton of blankets he was still completely in-tune with her body. He didn’t need to see her face though he wished he could to kiss her soft lips, to know the pleasure he was giving her, to know she was close. 

He blindly felt the warmth and wetness of her pussy driving into his hand slowly chasing the pleasure he was somehow able to provide in this state.

“Cum for me pretty girl, take it” he groaned lowly.

She moaned out, she sounded so exhausted and pitiful but he could tell she wanted this, needed it and he was more than happy to give it to her. 

She squealed softly as she rocked against his hand, her body exploding and the sweetness of her drenching his fingers, her face seeking the comfort of his embrace under the blanket, he moved over slightly as his left hand still pressed to the pain points guided her, help her her blanket covered forehead lay against his chest. Her hips kept rocking slowly chasing the feeling.

“There you go baby” his husky voice praised even with a migraine she was still his good girl. So wet and warm and tight for him.

Moments passed with his fingers still cupping her warm sticky folds and the other still applying the pressure she required, neither hand moved as he felt her drift of to sleep, her body finally relaxing from the endorphins of her orgasm. 

Austin woke to the press of a soft warm body slightly on top of his and light kisses and licks against his neck. He stirred and tried to adjust his eyesight to the darkness that had over taking the room. It must be late.

“Hey baby” her voice sounded softly, her lips suddenly near his own. She kissed his plump mouth, pecking kisses over and over. She sounded a lot better.

His arms moved to embrace her, pulling her further ontop of him and as close as he could get her. 

“Hey baby” he replied his eyes seeking hers. The dimmed light from the hallway allowed him to finally see her. Though he didn’t physically see her face earlier, he knew she looked more well rested than she had in the past day or two. Her eyes had a fatigue to them but he was sure that would clear up from the migraine once she got some more rest. All and all she almost looked back to her normal self. 

Her hand snaked up his chest to cup his face.

“Thank you, for everything” she told him a little emotionally.

He brought his lips to her for a passionate kiss, before laying his foreheads on hers.

“You don’t ever have to thank me, I’m yours, that’s what I’m here for, to take care of you” he whispered against her lips.

She pecked his again. 

“And I’m still going to say thank you” she mumbled.

He pinched her side playfully as she laughed and pushed at him.

They just gazed at one another and she had to blink to stop the tears. She had woke to Austin on his back, her body against his. She had unconsciously sought his while she slept as the tension faded from her body and to her surprise his hand was still gripping the back of her head. The pressure had loosed when he eventually fell asleep but his hand was still there nonetheless. She didn’t think she could love the man more and here she was slipping further in the ocean that was Austin and some how she was learning she could breathe underwater. He was everything to her.

“I have a surprise for you sweet boy” she said smiling at him like he hung the moon and she’d die on that hill that he did.

Austin’s chest ached in a good way. He never wanted this to end. Couldn’t imagine it being any other way. Everything that had failed for him relationship wise lead him to this moment with her. He was better for it. 

“Hmm, what’s that?” 

She nodded her head to the side of him and that’s when he noticed the en-suite bathroom door open and the soft glow of candles burning. The scent of oils and salts hitting him. He quickly turned back to her.

“Wh-“ 

“You were knocked out and I wanted to return the love” 

“You little sneak” he accused tickling her sides.

She was quick to scramble away from his hold and climb over him getting to her feet and out of his grasp when his hands followed her as she head toward the bathroom.

She stopped short of the door as she pulled her oversize graphic shirt over her head. 

“I would do that you know, sometimes, never with men though, I hated being touched during my migraines but when it was really bad and I had the energy I would do it myself to help ease the pain” she spoke from the doorway to the bathroom, the soft light surrounding her body, giving a even more beautiful glow to her brown skin. “I didn’t think it would ever work from someone else’s hand, not too sure what that means handsome” she smirked.

So she had done that before he thought but just never with man, no man had ever made her comfortable enough to try let alone achieve bringing her relief. Austin felt those butterflies in this stomach again, he felt a sense a pride swell in his chest. His cock was even stirring again. That’s exactly who he wanted to be for her, the man that gave what she needed, what others couldn’t, he wanted to be the one no other man could compare to. He wanted to be her all.

She smirked at him almost as if she could read his every thought and she could because they mirror her own and how she felt about him.

“Lets go loverboy, it’s time for the real show” 

X

X

ALSO yall don’t have to say anything abt it but i find it helps SOMETIMES but alone so I thought who could make this work for me with another person of course our boy Austin could bc he’s so perfect. He’s the only one I’d let touch me with a migraine lol

[justarkive]

TABLE 3 | JJK ch12

“For good service, and cute waitresses.”

pairing: pre!military jk x waitress/secret fuckbuddy!oc

Before Jungkook enlists in the military, his life takes an unexpected turn when he visits a local restaurant with friends and meets a waitress who doesn’t recognize him. Surprised by your lack of star-struck reaction, Jungkook finds himself drawn to your down-to-earth nature, especially his previous struggles with the pressure of constant drama on social media regarding his relationships. Little do you know, Jungkook is about to leave for the military, which inevitably bring’s complications to their connection��� do they find a way to fix it?

warnings: SMUT, profanity, angst, humour, fluff, celebrity au, idol!jungkook , mentions of other kpop groups/idols, inner conflict, insecurity. Jungkook is such a TEASE. Mr lee is in this chapter LMFAO. (thats lowkey my second man)

smut warnings: they fuck in his dressing room pre concert LOL, wall fucking, nipple play, breast play, clit play, someone knocks on the door and he just keeps going, oral f and m receiving, missionary, strength kink, uhh idk yall but its nasty

wc: LONG

this fic is not meant to represent the real jungkook or any other characters mentioned!

taglist: @jenniebyrubies @dreamersparacosm @darklove2020 @rayyrayy10 @elinaki92 @alana4610 @aznstoner

a/n: i am so sorry for takiny so long to release this chapter, im actually super happy w this. dince im not the best at writing sexually explicit details, i decided to focus more on the emotional tone during the smut. what are ur guys predictions to what happens next?? as always tysm for reading ILY

masterlist , <prev | next>

The day of the concert is finally here.

Five days have passed in a blur—slow when you were staring at your phone, waiting for a reply, and too fast when you realized how little time you actually had to process everything. Jungkook had been busy, that much was clear. You hadn’t seen him once since that night at the field, busy with dance practices, stage rehearsals, but it wasn’t like he had disappeared. If anything, he’d made his presence known in the way he always did—through little things.

A message in the morning, simple but warm. “Good morning. Excited?”

A random voice note in the afternoon, his voice slightly breathless, a little out of focus, as if he was speaking between rehearsal breaks. “Almost tripped on a speaker just now. Imagine if I just fell flat on my face mid-performance.Would you still cheer for me?”

A call late at night, just as your eyes were starting to shut, his voice softer in the dark. “You’re coming, right? You better be. No refunds.”

He hadn’t said much about the concert itself, just that he’d handle everything. And he had—down to the hotel room he booked for you and Nari, which, in her words, was “some straight-up billionaire sugar daddy behavior.” You weren’t sure what to make of it. It was just Jungkook being Jungkook—thoughtful, a little extra, and completely unaware of how easy he made it for you to get used to this.

And maybe that was the dangerous part.

The hotel room is extravagant in a way that almost feels comical—floor-to-ceiling windows overlooking the city skyline, sleek marble countertops, and a chandelier so obnoxiously large that Nari had dramatically gasped upon entering, claiming she had ascended into her “rich bitch era” overnight.

“Y/N.” Nari’s voice cuts through the room, sharp and brimming with excitement as she turns to you, hands on her hips. “This man. Booked you. A fucking penthouse. A PENTHOUSE.”

You glance up from where you’re sitting on the plush bed, slipping on your sneakers. “Nari, he booked us a room.”

“For what? For vibes? It’s only a little closer to the venue than your place. He just wants to spoil you,” she declares, plopping onto the bed beside you. “Like, for real. I would kill for my man to treat me like this.”

“He’s not my man,” you mumble, fixing the hem of your simple yet stylish outfit. The two of you had agreed on something lowkey—nothing too flashy, just enough to blend in with the crowd.

“Yet.” Nari smirks.

You glare at her. “Shut up.”

She grins, but surprisingly, she doesn’t push further. Instead, she busies herself with checking her makeup in the massive vanity mirror, adding a final touch of highlighter. The hotel room smells faintly of expensive cologne—probably lingering from the last guest—and something floral from the scented candles Nari had insisted on lighting “for the aesthetic.”

Your phone buzzes beside you.

Jungkook [7:42 PM]: u on your way yet?

Jungkook [7:42 PM]: I mean, I know you are, but just pretend I don’t have security watching the hotel entrance.

You [7:43 PM]: ?? stalker behavior.

Jungkook [7:43 PM]: and.

Rolling your eyes, you grab your bag and nudge Nari. “Time to go.”

The Uber ride to the venue is mostly filled with Nari hyping herself up while you stare out the window, watching as the streets become more crowded the closer you get. The realization fully settles in when the car slows down near the venue—thousands of people are gathered outside, their excited energy buzzing in the air.

It’s overwhelming. The sheer amount of love people have for him.

They only know him from what they see on screens, from music videos and interviews, from performances and social media snippets. They don’t know the way his voice softens when he’s tired, or the way he pouts slightly when he concentrates, or the way he texts you at the most random hours with pictures of his dog.

Your phone buzzes again.

Jungkook [8:02 PM]: Is there some guy there with slicked-back hair, a suit on, looking kinda hot like me?

You [8:02 PM]: Shut up. Who?

Jungkook [8:02 PM]: Talk to him. Tell him your name.

Jungkook [8:02 PM]: He’ll take you backstage.

You [8:03 PM]: WHERE WHAT I DONT SEE ANYONE

Jungkook [8:03 PM]: Gotta go. Have fun finding him.

“…He’s such an idiot,” you mutter, staring at the texts in disbelief.

Nari leans over, reading them over your shoulder. “Girl. We have to go find this dude now? In this crowd?”

“We don’t have a choice.”

It takes longer than you’d like, but after some awkward glances and frantic searching, you finally spot what you think is him—a tall, intimidating-looking man standing near the barricades, scanning the crowd like he’s waiting for someone.

Nari nudges you forward. “Go.”

You clear your throat, stepping closer. “Um. Hi. Uh—are you here for—um, Jungkook told me to—um—”

The man simply nods. “Come with me.”

You exchange a quick look with Nari before following him, trying to keep a low profile. It seems to work—most people probably assume you’re just being led to the restroom or something. But the moment you step past security barriers, through a side entrance, and down a hallway leading to the backstage area, the reality of it all settles in.

The dressing rooms are bustling with movement—stylists darting back and forth, crew members making last-minute preparations. The air is thick with the scent of hairspray and cologne, the sounds of muffled voices and distant music vibrating through the walls.

Nari, completely unfazed, immediately starts taking selfies in front of the vanity lights. “This lighting is insane. Oh my God.”

You barely have time to take in your surroundings before—

“No pictures in here.”

The voice is unfamiliar, deep and authoritative, sending a jolt of panic through you. You and Nari freeze, phones halfway raised.

Then you turn around—

Jungkook.

Standing there. Shirtless. Bare face. Hair still slightly messy, damp from whatever pre-show routine he had just finished.

He grins. “Gotcha.”

“Oh my God,” you exhale, pressing a hand to your chest. “What the fuck—”

Nari looks equally as stunned, though for different reasons. “Jungkook, you cannot sneak up on people like that when you look like—like that.”

He chuckles, eyes crinkling. Then, without a second thought, he steps forward and pulls you into a hug.

You stiffen, momentarily surprised. But by now, it’s almost second nature—the way he holds you, warm and firm, the scent of his body wash lingering on his skin.

“You okay?” he murmurs, voice close to your ear.

You nod, swallowing. “Yeah. This is just… crazy.”

“I know. celebrity shit, right?” He pulls back slightly, smirking down at you.

You shove his shoulder lightly. “Shut up.”

Meanwhile, Nari has fully recovered and is now scanning the room like a predator. “Jungkook. Are you alone?”

He blinks. “Uh… yeah?”

“Are any of the other members here?”

He gives her a blank look. “Nari. This is my solo tour.”

Nari sighs dramatically. “Damn. So no Kim Namjoon.”

Jungkook snorts, shaking his head. Then, as if remembering something, he suddenly points toward one of the stylists in the room—a tall, ridiculously attractive man adjusting a set of brushes on a table. “Hey, he’s single.”

Nari turns. Takes one look. Then confidently strides over and plops herself down beside the stylist.

The guy stiffens. Looks at her. Looks at Jungkook. Looks back at her.

Jungkook leans closer to you, grinning. “That dude is so scared right now.”

You sigh, shaking your head fondly. “She’s a menace.”

“And you love her for it.”

You glance up at him—his hair still damp, his skin glowing under the vanity lights, his eyes soft as he looks at you.

You swallow. “Yeah. I do.”

Jungkook hums, gaze flickering over your face. “Good.”

“You’re actually here,” Jungkook says, a grin already tugging at his lips. His voice is warm, familiar, and just a little breathless—like he can’t believe it himself. He takes a step closer, tilting his head as he studies your face. “I missed you.”

Your heart stumbles over itself. It’s not even what he said, it’s how he said it—so casually, like it was just a fact. Like he didn’t just drop it in the middle of a crowded dressing room, with stylists and staff bustling around, adjusting outfits, checking schedules, calling out times. But all of it fades because Jungkook is looking at you like you’re the only person in the room.

You swallow. “I—” You’re aware of the way your face heats up, how your voice wavers when you finally say, “I missed you too.”

Jungkook grins, and there’s something dangerous about it—something mischievous and knowing, like he was waiting for you to say it. Before you can even think about what that means, his fingers curl around your wrist, and suddenly, you’re being tugged forward. “Come,”

“What—wait—” You stumble after him, glancing back at Nari, who is very much not paying attention, currently perched next to the stylist Jungkook had called single earlier, chatting him up with all the confidence in the world.

“She looks preoccupied,” Jungkook muses, not even slowing down.

You barely get the chance to react before you’re being pulled past the chaos of the main dressing area, down a quieter hallway, and into another room. This one is different. It’s calmer, quieter, the sounds of the outside world muffled behind thick walls. The air is cooler here, tinged with expensive cologne and faint traces of fabric softener.

Your eyes sweep over the room, taking in the space that clearly belongs to him. The lighting is softer, casting everything in a warm glow. A sleek vanity takes up most of the wall, lined with makeup and hair products, but what catches your attention is the small golden plaque sitting at the edge of the mirror. Jeon Jungkook. His name, perfectly engraved, like it belongs here. Because, of course, it does.

To the side, a rack of outfits stands perfectly arranged—different variations of black, shimmering details, all expensive and carefully selected. A pair of stage shoes sit neatly beneath them. The entire space is neat but lived-in, touched by him in ways only someone who knows him would recognize.

You exhale softly, still turning, still taking it all in. “This is… a lot.”

Jungkook watches you with an amused glint in his eyes, arms folding over his chest. “Starstruck?”

You shoot him a look. “By you? Never. This? Yes.”

He grins. “Liar.”

The moment is interrupted when a woman with a sleek black bob and an air of effortless efficiency strides into the room, already pulling on a pair of latex gloves. “Jungkook, you need to start getting ready,” she announces, barely sparing you a glance as she sets down her kit beside the vanity.

Jungkook nods and moves to sit in the chair, spinning once before settling. You linger by the doorway, suddenly feeling a little out of place. The stylist doesn’t say anything about you being here—doesn’t even look at you twice—which somehow makes you more self-conscious. You shift on your feet, unsure of what to do, until Jungkook pats the empty chair beside him.

“Come sit,” he says easily.

You hesitate, glancing at the stylist, silently asking for some kind of approval. She doesn’t even look up from where she’s sorting through foundation bottles, just waves a hand dismissively. “As long as you don’t mess up his face, I don’t care.”

That’s… reassuring?

Slowly, you move to sit, feeling oddly formal in the cushy chair beside him. Up close, you can see just how tired he looks—the faint shadows under his eyes, the way he leans back into the chair like he hasn’t had a moment to just breathe all day.

“Long day?” you ask.

Jungkook exhales a laugh through his nose, eyes closing briefly as the stylist tilts his head to start on his base makeup. “You have no idea.”

You smile, arms folding in your lap. “Yeah? Try working a diner shift where a group of middle-aged businessmen keeps asking your friend for her number and writing thirsty notes on napkins.”

Jungkook’s eyes snap open, eyebrows raising. “What?”

You nod solemnly. “I had to physically pry one from Nari’s hands because she was about to read it out loud in front of everyone.”

He laughs, head tilting as the stylist tuts and pushes it back into place. “I need to hear what they wrote.”

You make a face. “Something about her being sweeter than the whipped cream on their pancakes, and that wasn’t even the worst one.”

Jungkook snorts, covering his mouth. “That’s disgusting.”

“I know,” you say, equally appalled. “But she was thriving. Every single one of them left with a broken heart.”

“Of course she was,” he murmurs, amused.

The stylist hums, leaning in to blend the foundation across his jaw. Jungkook tries to keep still, but he keeps turning his head toward you whenever he talks, forcing her to keep nudging him back into position.

“Stay still,” she says, unimpressed.

“Sorry,” he mumbles. Then, half a second later, “So how many guys are in love with her now?”

You shake your head, biting back a smile. “Too many to count. The diner is officially her kingdom.”

Jungkook grins, but it softens after a beat. “And you? No secret admirers?”

You scoff. “No weird napkin notes, if that’s what you’re asking.”

He hums, watching you through the mirror, a little too intently, a little too curious—until the stylist tugs his face back again with an exasperated sigh.

“Jungkook, please.”

The time passes quicker than you expect. Between Jungkook getting prodded and pampered by the stylists, the easy conversation, and the occasional Jungkook, stay still, the whole process feels surprisingly… normal. Like you’ve done this a million times before. Like sitting beside Jungkook in his dressing room while someone does his makeup is just another part of your day.

And then, suddenly, he’s done.

You blink, snapping out of your thoughts as the stylist steps away, satisfied with her work. Jungkook stretches his neck, examining himself in the mirror with a lazy kind of approval. “Nice,” he mutters, rubbing a thumb against his jaw before he suddenly—without warning—reaches for the hem of his shirt you didn’t even realise he’d put on a few minutes ago.

You don’t even have time to process what’s happening before he’s pulling it off.

Your brain short-circuits. He’s shirtless. Again.

The mirror betrays you immediately. You don’t even mean to stare—you don’t—but Jungkook is right there, in clear view, and suddenly there’s a whole lot of bare skin and a whole lot of defined muscle and your brain just shuts down.

This isn’t new. This has happened before. A million times, (twice) even.

You swear you only stare for half a second. Maybe a full second. Maybe a little longer, but that’s hardly the point because when you finally snap out of it and tear your gaze away—heart thudding embarrassingly hard—your eyes flick up to the mirror again and—

Jungkook is looking right at you.

You freeze.

He grins.

“For the millionth time,” he drawls, voice rich with amusement. “See something you like?”

You nearly die on the spot.

“No—” you stammer, cheeks burning, eyes everywhere but him. “I—I was just—the mirror—it’s there—so obviously—”

He laughs, loud and delighted, as he throws on his next outfit: a sleeveless mesh vest hoodie that does nothing to help your situation. If anything, it somehow makes it worse. It clings to his torso, effortlessly stylish, the fabric shifting with every movement. He layers it with a slightly oversized jacket—just casual enough to be cool, just structured enough to make him look even better than he already does. He pairs it with loose-fitting jeans and his signature boots, the entire ensemble looking so effortlessly put together that it’s almost unfair.

You force yourself to look anywhere else, swallowing hard. “You could’ve warned me.”

“Warned you about what?” Jungkook teases, fastening a simple chain around his neck. “Me changing? Thought you were used to it by now.”

You glare, knowing full well that your flushed cheeks are ruining any attempt at feigned indifference. “I was looking at the mirror.”

“Mhm.” He smirks, tilting his head. “And what did the mirror show you?”

You nearly throw something at him.

The two of you settle into an easy quiet as the pre-show chaos hums in the background. There’s nothing left to do but wait. Jungkook stretches out on the couch, one arm slung over the backrest, looking completely at ease despite the impending concert. You, on the other hand, feel like you’re sitting on a time bomb—this entire situation is insane, and yet he’s acting like it’s just another day.

At some point, a staff member brings in food—just a few things Jungkook ordered earlier—and the two of you dig in. It’s nothing too heavy, just something to keep him going before he goes on stage, but the way he pushes a container toward you, all casual and wordless, makes your heart do a weird little thing.

“So,” you say after a few bites, just to fill the silence, “are you nervous?”

Jungkook, mid-chew, raises a brow. He swallows, then grins. “Nope.”

You squint at him. “Not at all?”

“Not at all,” he repeats easily, plucking a fry from the box between you. “It’s fun. The stage, the energy—it’s like…” He trails off for a moment, as if searching for the right word, then just shakes his head. “It’s the best feeling in the world.”

You hum, chewing thoughtfully. “I feel like I’d be terrified. Thousands of people watching your every move?” You shudder dramatically. “One wrong step and boom—memed forever.”

Jungkook barks out a laugh, amused. “That has happened, you know. But I don’t mind now. It’s part of it. Used to freak out about a little mistake but now? They come with it all, it’s inevitable.”

You watch as he picks up his phone, casually opening Twitter like he does this all the time. His expression shifts almost immediately—lips twitching into a fond smile, eyes soft with something warm.

“I always do this before a show,” he says, scrolling through his feed. “I love seeing how excited ARMY gets while they’re waiting.”

He angles the screen toward you, showing a sea of posts—fancams from outside the venue, people in matching outfits, handmade signs, inside jokes only his fans would understand. It’s a flood of love, of uncontainable anticipation, and Jungkook is soaking it all in like it’s his lifeblood.

“Look at the crowd already,” he murmurs, swiping to a video someone posted from the pit. The venue is packed—people chanting, singing, waving their lightsticks even though the show hasn’t started yet. “They’re amazing.”

You glance at him, taking in the way he watches the screen—completely adoring, like he still can’t believe all of this is real. Like it means something to him, deep in his bones.

And suddenly, you get it.

This isn’t just a job to him. This isn’t just a routine. It’s love.

“You’re such a sap,” you say, nudging his foot with yours.

Jungkook grins, eyes twinkling. “Maybe.”

Jungkook stretches, rolling his shoulders back before standing up, the shift in his energy almost instant. His relaxed posture straightens, muscles flexing as he starts moving through warm-up exercises, humming lightly under his breath. You watch as he tests his voice, adjusting his stance, subtly bouncing on the balls of his feet like a boxer before a fight.

Then, almost as quickly as he got up, a staff member peeks in and calls him out for something. Most of the stylists follow, leaving the room feeling noticeably emptier, the only company left being one last stylist who seems far more interested in her sandwich than small talk.

You sit there for a moment, picking at the food in front of you, aimlessly scrolling through your phone. The room feels heavier now—quieter, save for the faint sounds of activity outside. You wonder how long he’ll be gone.

Then, suddenly, the stylist speaks.

“How have you not got caught?” She laughs.

The words are casual, spoken between bites, but they hit like a slap. You blink, looking up, only to find her still chewing, barely sparing you a glance.

“All this shit,” she continues, taking another bite. “Is like… super risky.”

It’s not outright rude, but there’s something about the way she says it—offhanded, like she’s scolding you without really scolding you—that makes your stomach twist.

You part your lips, unsure of what to even say. Do you defend yourself? Do you tell her that this wasn’t your idea? That Jungkook was the one who invited you? That you never asked for any of this?

Even though you really, really don’t wanna stop.

But before you can even muster up a response, she dusts off her hands, bins the rest of her sandwich, and walks out. Just like that.

You exhale, long and slow, suddenly hyper-aware of everything.

She’s not wrong.

It is risky.

Jungkook is Jungkook, an untouchable force with an entire world watching his every move. And you? You’re just… here. Sitting in his private dressing room, eating his food, waiting for him like you belong in this space when—realistically—you don’t.

You know how the internet works. How fast rumors can spread. How easily people can twist things. If someone saw you right now—if a picture leaked—what kind of headlines would come out of it? Because you’re sure it wont be another awkwardly blurry, badly angled photo like last time.

Would this get him in trouble? Would you?

The intrusive thoughts pile up too quickly, drowning you in doubt. By the time Jungkook returns, beaming with two drinks in hand, you’re barely holding it together.

“Look what I got,” he says, passing you one. He’s still a little breathless, his excitement crackling like electricity in the air. “My favorite—”

“Should I leave?”

It comes out of nowhere. The words tumble from your lips before you can stop them, your fingers curling tightly around the drink. Jungkook’s smile falters.

“What?”

“I—I should leave,” you repeat, swallowing hard. “What if we get caught? Is— me being here a problem?”

His expression shifts immediately, the warmth in his eyes dimming. His brows furrow, lips parting slightly like he can’t believe what he’s hearing. “Who said that?”

You hesitate, suddenly wishing you hadn’t said anything at all. “No one, I just—”

“Who.” His voice is sharper this time, more urgent, his entire demeanor changing as he takes a step closer.

You stumble over your words, not knowing how to explain. “It’s just—people talk, Jungkook, and—”

“So..” His jaw tightens. “You think I don’t want you here?” His voice is low, raw with frustration, disbelief, and maybe even a little hurt. It hits you like a punch to the gut, and suddenly, it feels like the air between you both is thicker. The weight of it presses down on you, suffocating, almost.

You try to breathe, but it’s like your lungs are fighting against you. He takes a step closer. Your heart stutters.

“Hmm?” His hand comes up slowly, almost deliberately, and it rests on your chin. The grip is firm, but not harsh—secure, like he’s not letting you look away. And just like that, the space between you both feels electrified. The tension grows thick, undeniable.

Your voice falters, caught in your throat. “N-no, I just—”

“Just what?” His voice drips with mockery as he nudges your chin higher, his thumb tracing just under your jaw. “Because I can show you, if you want, how much I want you to be here.”

His words fall heavily between you, your breath catching in your throat. There’s a flash of something—desire, maybe fear—rushing through you. The proximity is almost too much, and yet, you can’t pull away.

You open your mouth to reply, but the words won’t come. The silence stretches, thick and heavy between you. He doesn’t give you the chance to say anything more. Without warning, he closes the distance, his lips crashing against yours.

He doesn’t break the kiss, but his hand shifts, sliding up to gently grip your chin. His fingers are firm, tilting your head back to meet him fully. His touch is deliberate, guiding you closer to him as if he’s in control of the pace, the way your lips part slightly to let him deepen the kiss.

He pulls away, and you can’t help the soft whine that escapes your lips at the loss of his kiss. A smirk curls on his lips as he stands, his gaze holding yours with that same mischievous glint. He locks the door with a quiet click, the sound somehow louder in the charged silence, before striding back to you, his steps confident, almost predatory.

Jungkook approaches you slowly. “I’m not done with you yet.”

Your breath hitches, the weight of it all suddenly crashing down on you. You’re in Jeon Jungkook’s dressing room, and god knows how much time he has before his performance. “W-what? This is insane… someone could hear us…”

Jungkook stands in front of you, his voice low and teasing as his hands settle on your hips. “Can you feel how much I want you?”

You nervously flicker your eyes to his lips, your heart racing. “I… I don’t think this is a good—”

He cuts you off with a chuckle, cupping your face in his hands and gently lifting your chin to meet his gaze. “I want all of you…” His tone softens, but the grip on your waist tightens, as if he’s afraid you’ll slip away. “But if you’re not comfortable doing this here, we don’t have to.”

Suddenly, the thrill of being caught washes over your doubts, and before you can second-guess yourself, you crash your lips back on his. You feel him smirk into the kiss, the heat between you two escalating.

You lose track of time, as if you’ve been kissing him forever—and honestly, you’re not complaining. Every kiss feels intense, your lips teasing his lip piercing, occasionally nibbling it.

You hear him grunt softly against your mouth, the sound sending a shiver down your spine. His hands slip down to your neck, his fingers gripping just tight enough to leave you breathless, urging you closer.

He pulls back just enough, his hand still on your neck, keeping you anchored to him.

“You’re so beautiful,” His eyes don’t leave yours, the intensity of his gaze making your pulse race. Like it always does. Slowly, he undoes his jeans, the sound of the zipper almost deafening in the charged silence between you.

He chuckles softly, struggling a bit to kick his jeans off. His lips are magnets, pulling you in despite the little space between you, and you can’t help but press yourself against the hand still wrapped around your neck. You lean in desperately, hungry for his kiss again.

“Patience, baby,” he murmurs, voice laced with amusement, though his eyes are full of hunger. He kicks his jeans off, and before you can fully process, his lips are on yours again—quicker this time, more urgent. But just as you start to deepen the kiss, he pulls away, leaving you breathless.

Frustration bubbles up inside you, but it’s replaced by a new heat as his hands move down, frantically pawing at the straps of your dress. His fingers tremble, eager, desperate, as if he can’t get it off fast enough.

You help him, giggling, your hands trembling as you slide the dress off, letting it drop to the floor in a heap.

Your fingers move eagerly to his jacket, pulling at the fabric, “Off,” You urge him, while his lips are still on yours. The kiss is frantic now—more breathing than kissing, your breaths mingling between heated sighs.

“Please…” The word escapes you in a soft, desperate whimper, your chest rising and falling with each ragged breath as you tug at his jacket, unwilling to wait any longer.

Jungkook is now shirtless, and so are you, your nipples instantly harden to the cold air from the AC in the room, your bodies pressed together. It’s a bit awkward, in the sense that you’re on your heels, grinding ever so slightly on the bulge of his boxers, but you couldn’t care less.

His hands roam over your skin, hot and so needy, as he kisses his way down your neck. His lips are soft but deliberate, savoring the feel of you, every inch of your skin. You shiver under his touch, throwing your head back and curling your fingers into his scalp, heart racing, the sensation of him against you overwhelming.

He pauses at your collarbone, breathing against your skin, his voice low and husky, “Feel’ so fucking good.”

“F-fuck, please…” You gasp, breath hitching as Jungkook works his way down your body, his lips trailing slowly over your skin, teasing you with each touch. He chuckles softly against your bare skin, sending a shiver down your spine, before he takes his time, sucking gently on each of your nipples, pulling a quiet moan from your lips.

His hands roam, gripping your hips, pulling you closer to him as his mouth leaves a trail of heat across your skin. You feel his smile against you, a smugness in his teasing, but it only makes you crave him more.

Before you can even process it, Jungkook’s on his knees in front of you, his hands sliding down your body to peel off your panties. The sudden shift in position leaves you breathless, his movements deliberate and slow.

He noses at your slit, inhaling deeply, with a lewd, audible swoosh of air, his eyes dark with hunger. You can’t help the way your hips buck slightly at the sensation, the thrill of it all making your heart race.

“Mm, babe,” he groans, his voice rough and low, sending a shiver down your spine. “Smell so good…” His breath fans against you as he presses closer, his hands gripping your thighs as he teases you, making you ache for more.

Before you know it, your patience runs thin. Unable to wait any longer, you grab a handful of his hair, guiding his face where you need him most. The moment your fingers tangle in his locks, he doesn’t hesitate—he dives in, licking, sucking, and lapping eagerly at your core. His low chuckle vibrates against you, clearly amused by your desperation.

You can’t help but grind against his face, unfortunately messing up his makeup with your juices which just flow out onto his lips, chin and even his nose, driven by need. His touch is intoxicating, each movement of his tongue sending shockwaves of pleasure through your body.

“Jungkook—” you gasp, his name falling from your lips as you lose yourself in the sensation.

He licks at your pulsing clit, alternating between gently dipping his tongue into your walls and sucking hard, each movement calculated to make you tremble. His pace doesn’t falter, and you can feel the vibrations of his moan against you, sending a rush of heat through your body. The sound, raw and desperate, only fuels the growing fire inside you.

You can barely focus on anything else, lost in the sensation of him, his persistence, and the way his body moves against yours, like he’s trying to memorize every part of you.

“Jungkook…” you whisper, the tension building.

He looks up at you, a knowing smile curling on his lips, before he softly brushes his hands against your skin, his hands gentle on your thighs “Let go,” he murmurs. “It’s just us here.”

You feel something prodding at your entrance, his tongue still not letting up- if anything, hes going much faster now. Licking and slurping like a damn starved man.

If theres anything you know about Jungkook, its that he does not hesitate to go all in when it comes to your pleasure. You’re convinced that he-

“Could eat this pussy for hours, babe” He mumbles into your slick, slushy core. It’s disgusting how much this man has you fucking drenching his pretty face.

And he just let’s it happen.

Like a real ass man.

Before you know it, his finger intrudes in. “Fuck!”

But it’s not just the movement of his finger that has you reeling. It’s the damn silver ring he’s still wearing on his middle finger. The cool metal presses against you with every thrust, the contrast between the chill of the ring and the heat of your body sending waves of sensation through you. Your hips move instinctively, pushing harder into his face, chasing the friction.

And Jungkook? He just fucking laughs into your pussy, like he knew he’d coax that reaction out of you.

He moves his finger slowly at first, deliberately tracing that spot he somehow found so easily. The sensation is almost too much, and your breath catches in your throat as he picks up the pace, each movement deliberate, making you tremble beneath him. Then, without warning, he adds another finger, stretching you further, and you can’t help the gasp that escapes your lips.

“Jungkook- Fuck!”

He doesn’t stop. His rhythm quickens, frantic tongue flicking at your clit and his hold tightening around your thighs.

At this point, you’re lost to it, unable to think, to breathe. The ache in your hips from frantically grinding is overpowered by the sheer pleasure of well- Jungkook. All that’s left is him, the way he moves, the way he makes you feel. It’s too much, and you can’t hold back anymore.

The wave crashes over you before you can even catch your breath. Your body trembles with the release, his name a breathless echo on your lips as your vision blurs. You’re grinding faster than ever now, and Jungkook knows not to change his pace, keeping it up until you have to physically pry him off of your pussy.

He rises back up to you, his hands finding your waist, pulling you closer. His eyes darken as he licks his lips, like he can’t bear the thought of not tasting you again. It’s a look that sends a rush of warmth through your chest, making your breath catch in your throat. You exhale softly, unable to hold back a small giggle at the way he’s looking at you.

He smirks, that playful glint never leaving his gaze. “That good?” he teases, because Jungkook would probably rather die than not tease you with his silly remarks, his voice low, but there’s a softness beneath the teasing, a hint of something more intimate.

“Always make me feel so good,” You say, a little breathless.

You nudge him playfully, but then you become acutely aware of the way he’s pressed against you, the hard bulge pressing into your lower stomach. It’s like the air between you thickens, the tension rising again, and you can’t help but feel your own pulse quicken. Jungkook’s movements shift, grinding into you without even realizing it, his body reacting to the closeness like it’s second nature.

He notices the way your breath catches, the way you become more aware of his movements. His lips curve into a knowing smile before he dips his head lower, his mouth brushing softly against your breasts.

“Forgot about these, baby,” he murmurs, his voice rough with desire.

He kneads your breasts with a gentle but insistent pressure, his hands moving with purpose. His tongue flicks out, teasing each nub, and the sensation causes soft Ah’s escape your lips, the sound mixing with the growing rhythm of his body pressed against yours.

The grinding of his hips against yours becomes faster, more urgent, but it’s the way his touch feels—soft, yet driven—that leaves you breathless, wanting more.

Your patience begins to wear thin, and without thinking, you reach for his boxers, pulling them down slowly. His cock springs out, slapping against his abs with a soft thud. He grabs the base, spitting down on the tip that’s weeping with pre-cum, and begins to stroke it slowly.

Did it get… bigger?

You moan shamelessly.

Jungkook grins at you, the playful glint in his eyes never leaving. The way his body reacts to you, the anticipation, only heightens your own. You freeze for a moment, caught off guard by the closeness and the intensity.

“Want it so bad,” you whisper, feeling your heart race.

His smile deepens, and without hesitation, he leans in, his lips brushing against yours as he takes a deep breath, the heat between you both growing with every movement. His fingers graze your skin tenderly as he takes a moment to look at you, his expression soft, but with a hunger that makes your stomach flutter.

“Yeah?” he asks, voice rough, yet gentle. There’s care in his eyes, a tenderness that grounds you despite everything. His strokes don’t let up, and the lewd squelch of it fills the room.

You meet his gaze, your breath shaky, but you nod, your hands trembling as you skim your hands over his chest, feeling him up, feeling the connection that seems to run so much deeper than the physical everytime you’re intertwined in this sense.

His hand moves to yours, guiding them to his cock a quiet confidence, and everything feels right—natural.

As your hands reach for his cock, Jungkook’s breath hitches. He leans in, his eyes locking with yours, watching you carefully as you start to move your hand gently under his, his expression a mix of admiration and need. The way your fingers wrap around him feels so intimate, and he can’t help but groan softly at how the size of his cock makes your hand look fucking miniscule.

“So good,” he murmurs, voice low, as if trying to ground himself in the moment. He watches you, seeing the way you take control, how the trust between you builds with every movement.

For a second, he stops you, his hand over yours, his thumb brushing over your knuckles, the simple gesture of reassurance. Then, with a quiet breath, he pulls back slightly, allowing you to take the reins. There’s a softness in his gaze, as if he’s telling you without words that he trusts you completely.

“Fuck,” he breathes, his tone laced with wonder and vulnerability, and you feel it—how much of him is laid bare in these moments. His cock is heavy in your hands, hard as a fucking rock. And you whimper while tightening your grip, wanting more of his moans.

He starts to fuck into your fist, his breath warm against your neck, each movement slow and deliberate. His lips find their way to your neck, a soft moan escaping him as he pulls you closer, grounding himself in the moment. You respond, your pace quickening, feeling the tension between you both build.

“Like that…,” he breathes, voice thick with desire, but there’s something more there—a vulnerability, a need for the closeness, for your connection. You can feel him, not just physically, but emotionally, and it makes everything feel even more intense.

His hands find their way to your body, his grip tightening as he holds you, like he wants to be closer than ever.

The desire between you both intensifies, and Jungkook’s thrusts into your hand become more urgent, his breath coming in soft gasps.

You can feel his tension, the way he’s holding back, desperately trying to stay present in the moment. His lips trail back down your neck, his moans muffled against your skin, and it only makes the connection between you stronger.

His pace quickens, fucking your fist faster than ever, the need for more growing, but then, suddenly, he pulls back, his eyes locking with yours. He fucks your hand frantically with his cock while staring at your face, as if that’s the only thing he needs to get him going. There’s a vulnerability in his gaze, something raw and unspoken.

His cock twitches on your stomach when he moves away, practically begging for release. And you cock an eyebrow at him teasingly.

“Turn around,” he whispers, guiding you gently but urgently, his hands pressing against your waist as he pushes you against the wall.

He spreads your thighs slightly, bending down to tease your folds with his tip. Your breath hitches, a soft moan escaping your lips. You instinctively reach for him, pulling him closer, your hands finding refuge in the crook of his neck. He presses a soft kiss to your skin, but before you can fully settle into the moment, he pulls away, a look of frustration crossing his features.

“Shit… condom,” he mutters under his breath, as though the realization hits him too late.

He takes a moment to steady himself, his hand brushing over his chest, as if trying to ground himself in the situation. You turn around, searching the dressing room for what he needs, but before you can speak, he leans in, kissing you deeply, a fleeting connection before he steps away.

“Wait,” he says, his voice low and hurried. He moves toward the couch, pulling his wallet from his jacket. He rummages through it and then, with a quick motion, pulls out a condom, his focus entirely on you.

He hands you the condom, a sheepish smile on his lips, and for a brief moment, you’re caught off guard, unsure of what he wants. But then, it clicks. He wants you to put the condom on for him. The realization warms you, and you let out a soft laugh, shaking your head.

“You absolute baby,” you tease, your voice light with affection as you gently roll the condom onto his cock. His grin widens at the playful remark, his eyes locking onto yours with a mix of admiration and affection. He presses a soft kiss to your lips again, a fleeting moment that makes your heart race even faster.

He pauses for a moment, his hand brushing over his cock a few times before he gently turns you back around, his breath hitching in his chest.

“Ready?” he asks softly, his voice full of anticipation but tempered with care, wanting to make sure you’re on the same page.

You let out a soft whine, the feeling of anticipation building inside you. You push back against his cock, and he fucks his length between your ass cheeks for a few seconds, kneading the skin. You crave more of him, and the connection between you both feels almost too much to bear. He takes a slow breath, trying to steady himself, before gently guiding his cock in to you.

He enters you slowly, his movements tender but filled with the intensity of the moment. You wince slightly, the familiar stretch making your walls ache, but it quickly melts into a soft moan, the sensation overwhelming in the best way.

“Tight fuckin’ fit,” he murmurs softly, his voice rough with desire, as his forehead presses against yours when you tug his face towards the crook of your neck and look at him, your hand in his scalp. Eyes closed in a mix of pleasure and awe at the closeness between you both.

He quickens his pace slightly, and you breathe into his mouth, your desperation growing with each movement.

“Harder,” you whisper, barely able to contain the yearning in your voice. He listens, his movements becoming faster, deeper, and you feel every inch of his cock inside you, as if he’s anchoring you to the moment.

His touch moves lower, fingertips grazing your sensitive clit, sending shivers through you. The sensation intensifies, and your senses blur together—his warmth, his rhythm, your connection. Every part of you feels alive with him.

“Harder,” you whisper, your voice trembling with need. Jungkook responds immediately, his movements becoming faster, more urgent. You can feel him everywhere, a deep connection forged in each motion, each breath.

Without warning, he pulls away gently, turning you around and guiding you to the floor. His hands are careful but firm, making sure you’re comfortable even as the intensity builds. He straddles you, not putting too much weight on your torso, and you find your head resting against the cool wall. The change in position has your breath hitching.

His body moves in front of you, and there’s a moment of humor when his wet cock taps your cheek by accident. You let out a small laugh, pretending to look scandalized, but the playful teasing fades as he focuses entirely on you.

Jungkook’s grip on his base is steady, his eyes locked with yours, silently asking for trust. He guides you with a hand nudging your heard forward towards his cock carefully, urging you to take control in this moment, but there’s no mistaking the power in his hands, the authority in his touch.

He waits for you to follow his lead.

You focus on ignoring the ache building within you, your mouth finding him as you draw him in. His breath hitches, and he groans, his hand resting gently in your hair. “Yeah, baby…” His voice trembles, and you can feel the rush of his desire.

You welcome him, moving with him, guiding him deeper, the taste of the condom isn’t particularly the best, but you’re too turned on to care, as your hand encourages him gently. You feel the heat building even further. Your movements quicken, a rush of desperation taking over you as he fills your mouth entirely with his cock.

But just as it feels like you’re lost in it all, he pulls back, his touch soft yet firm. He gazes down at you, and before you can fully process it, he’s stumbling backwards, a sudden coolness following as he spreads your folds out, before shoving his cock in so hard you cant help but to squeal, taking control in a way that leaves you breathless.

“Fucking shit—,” he groans, his hands moving to your body, gripping your waist tightly as he deepens his thrusts, the rhythm between you both frantic and desperate.

A gasp slips from your lips, your head spinning with the overwhelming sensation when suddenly, a knock at the door breaks through the chaos. Your heart stops. Jungkook freezes as well, both of you frozen in the moment.

“Jungkook?” The doorknob turns, the sound of someone approaching sending a wave of panic through you.

He looks at you with a smirk, but there’s a gleam in his eyes that holds a certain dominance. His hand gently presses against your mouth, silencing you. The intensity between you builds up more, and the knocks at the door spur him to fuck into you faster, the pressure mounting as he keeps moving, determined not to stop despite the interruption.

“Im fuck- Fuckin’ busy!” He shouts towards the door, enthralled by the ring of white your leaving around his dick. And you try so hard to muffle your moans, but at this point…

Whoever it is outside definitely knows.

Another knock at the door echoes, and your breath catches in your throat as his pace quickens, hitting that spot that makes everything else fade. The pressure builds, and with a quiet, teasing whisper, he leans down to your ear and murmurs, “Stay quiet, baby. Don’t want anyone to know what we’re doing, hm?”

You glare at him, frustrated and desperate, but your body betrays you as you shift your hips back against him, your breath shallow, a soft whine escaping your lips. You’re lost in the feeling, fighting to keep quiet, but it’s almost impossible.

Another knock at the door sounds, but it only seems to push Jungkook even further, his movements becoming even more urgent. He doesn’t reply this time. His hand moves from your mouth, trailing to your core, and you can feel the frantic energy in his breath as he urges you to stay quiet, but it’s becoming harder to hold back. You press your lips together, eyes squeezed shut, silently hoping whoever it is will leave quickly.

When the knocks finally stop, the room fills with the sound of his thighs smacking against yours at an alarming pace, and you can’t help but gasp at the way his tip just annihilates that spot.

You grip his broad back, grounding yourself as he lifts you, holding you up on his kneeling form by your ass cheeks, gently but firmly, guiding your body in time with his movements. The sensation builds rapidly when he starts lifting you up and down his length, and you throw your head back, one hand behind you on the wall, and you press your lips against his, matching his movements as best as you can, your hands gripping his hair, needing him closer.

“You’re so fuckin’ pretty, babe.” He moans softly into your ear, his voice shaky. “I’m close.”

You nod, your body shaking with anticipation. He quickens his pace, his breath against your skin making it harder to focus. The sound of his voice, the closeness between you both—everything swells within you, and in an instant, you feel yourself losing control, your body responding to the rhythm, desperately seeking more.

You give in, the intensity of the moment pushing you over the edge, and you let out a breathless moan, your body moving with his, seeking that final connection.

You press your teeth into his back, the soft bite grounding you as your frantic movements slow to gentle, steady motions. He groans deeply, and you feel him tense, the weight of the moment heavy as he fills the condom.

He pulls back just enough to kiss your face, his lips brushing softly over your skin, and it makes your heart pound in your chest. His voice is low, filled with emotion as he murmurs something about how perfect you are.

You hold him close, your fingers in his hair, your breath shaky as you pull him against you, feeling the warmth of his breath on your neck. Everything around you fades as you just let the closeness of the moment wash over you.

After what feels like an eternity of comfortable silence, the position becomes awkward. Jungkook’s body shifts as his softening length reminds you of the moment’s gravity, and you wince slightly. Sensing your discomfort, he gently pulls away, lifting you carefully and guiding you to the couch where his jacket is laid out. He doesn’t seem to mind at all that some of you have spilled onto it.

You start to speak, “Your jacket—”

He interrupts, his voice soft but full of concern. “Are you okay?” He leans down, brushing your hair back from your face, his touch tender, as if trying to make sure you’re okay.

You nod softly, watching him slide the condom off and dispose of it in the takeout bag from earlier, tossing it in the bin with a quiet finality. The intimacy of being naked together feels overwhelmingly heartwarming, almost frightening in its vulnerability. You try to push away the overwhelming thoughts, but one sudden realization hits you.

You look around, your heart skipping a beat. This is Jungkook’s damn dressing room. How much time do you really have before his concert?

Your voice catches in your throat, worry creeping into your expression. “Jungkook—how long—”

He walks over to you, a sense of calm settling over him. He throws his briefs back on and plops down next to you on the couch, his presence grounding. “Relax,” he says, his voice soothing. “We have a while.”

You sit in silence for a while, the weight of the moment settling between you. The lingering feeling of the aftermath slowly begins to take over, and you look around the room, your eyes landing on a pack of baby wipes. Hesitant, you take them in your hand, your cheeks flushing with a sense of shyness. Gently, you clean yourself, the act feeling oddly intimate in its own right, especially with him still beside you.

But Jungkook doesn’t make you feel self-conscious. He looks away, respecting your space, and for a moment, it feels as though the world outside of the two of you has faded away. You slip your panties back on, and despite the effort to clean up, you can’t shake the feeling that you’ll need a shower to truly feel refreshed. The wipes didn’t do much, but you’re too tired to care right now. The thought of the shower later is the only thing on your mind.

You plop back down next to him after slipping into your dress, giggling softly at the sight of him still in his damn briefs. “You’re acting like you have all the time in the world,” you tease, a playful smile tugging at your lips.

Jungkook hesitates for a moment, and the smile on his face falters just slightly. For a split second, his eyes shift away from yours, and he runs a hand through his hair, his thoughts drifting somewhere far away. You don’t pry, but the tension in his gaze doesn’t go unnoticed.

Because he takes your words differently.

He doesn’t want to spoil the moment, doesn’t want to burden you with the weight of his departure when everything feels so fragile between them. So, he throws on his clothes quickly, forcing a smile back onto his face. As he presses a kiss to your head, his heart clenches, feeling the guilt of what he’s doing.

But for now, just for this moment, he’s going to hold onto you. He won’t let go of this. Not yet.

Jungkook chuckles, guiding you over to the mirror. The reflection staring back at you both is one of disarray—hair a mess, clothes slightly askew, faces flushed, and there’s an undeniable glow that only comes from being thoroughly worn out.

You both burst into laughter at the sight. His grin is wide, amused, and somehow softer than usual.

“Well,” he says, his voice teasing, “I’m definitely getting in trouble for this.” He looks at you, shaking his head. “Should’ve known I’d be a disaster right before a show.”

You laugh, turning your face towards him. “We both look like we just got hit by a bus, actually.”

Jungkook quirks an eyebrow, stepping closer. “But a cute bus, right?” His voice is playful, and you can’t help but roll your eyes, nudging him lightly with your shoulder.

“I guess,” you mutter, still smiling, feeling all the tension melt away.

You both stare at your reflection for a moment, your exhaustion more endearing than anything else. He looks at you with a soft expression, that familiar warmth creeping back into his eyes.

“You okay?” he asks, quieter now, as if checking in after everything that happened.

You nod, smiling gently at him. “Yeah… I’m good.” And you mean it, because despite all the chaos, it feels like a moment just for the two of you.

A few minutes pass, and the two of you sit side by side on the couch, munching on a packet of crisps that’s been left on the table. They’re not great—dry and bland—but it’s enough to keep you both occupied. You pop one into your mouth, immediately cringing at the taste, and Jungkook bursts out laughing.

“These are terrible,” he says between bites, his voice muffled. “How did we even end up with these?”

You shrug, snickering. “I honestly have no idea. But we’re committed now. No turning back.”

You both giggle, the sound echoing through the dressing room. The playful mood lingers as you both try to finish off the last few crisps, trying to keep up the charade that you’re enjoying them, even though your faces say otherwise.

Finally, Jungkook tosses the bag onto the coffee table and leans back, stretching his arms above his head. “Alright, I can’t handle this anymore. Let’s go out.“

Before you can protest, he’s already pulling you toward the door, stumbling a little as he tries to maneuver around. You laugh at his uncoordinated steps, and with a teasing look, you playfully nudge him as you follow.

“Jungkook, you’re gonna trip,” you warn, your smile never fading.

“Never,” he smirks, but his voice is light, almost playful, as he struggles to keep his balance.

Jungkook steps out of the room first, running a hand through his completely wrecked hair, trying and failing to fix it. His jacket is off now, leaving him in just that mesh vest, his skin flushed, a light sheen of sweat glistening along his collarbones. You, on the other hand, are still giggling under your breath, barely holding it together as you trail after him, dazed and dizzy from whatever the hell just happened in there.

But the moment your feet hit the main room, a sharp voice cuts through the air.

“Stop fucking around. You have 15 minutes—get it together.”

You freeze.

Jungkook does too.

A manager—you’re not even sure which one, considering your brain short-circuits the second you hear them—stands a few feet away, arms crossed, gaze unamused. They don’t linger, though, turning on their heel just as fast as they appeared, leaving the words to hang thickly in the air.

The shift in Jungkook is instant.

His jaw tightens. His playful energy vanishes. His hand—wrapped so securely around yours just moments ago—lets go.

And that—that stupid little action—stings more than it should.

You know it’s nothing personal. You know it’s just him slipping into work mode, flipping the switch like he’s probably had to do a million times before. But the sudden absence of warmth against your palm makes your stomach drop anyway, leaves something unpleasant twisting in your chest.

Jungkook, for his part, doesn’t even glance your way. He exhales sharply, runs a hand down his face, and—

Drags you right back toward the main room.

You barely have time to process it, blinking up at him as he tugs you along like nothing happened.

“Damn, he was—“

Before you can even finish the sentence, his grip tightens, and you let yourself get pulled along, your heart still racing for entirely different reasons now.

“FIVE MINUTES!”

The call cuts through the room, and if things were chaotic before, now it’s mayhem.

Jungkook is in the middle of his last warmup, his voice clear even through the surrounding noise. His stylists are fussing over him one last time, his in-ears are checked again, and yet—despite all the urgency, despite the fact that a whole team is practically pushing him toward the door—he’s looking around the room.

For you.

The second he spots you, he doesn’t hesitate. He runs over, dodging people left and right, slipping past staff who are trying to usher him forward.

“Hey,” he says breathlessly, stopping right in front of you. “I’ll see you later, yeah? Ask someone to lead you to your part.”

Before you can even process his words—before you can nod or reply—he leans in.

And presses a quick peck to your cheek.

Your brain short-circuits.

Your breath catches, your entire body freezes, and your face burns—the warmth of his lips lingering on your skin long after he pulls away.

By the time you manage to stutter out a weak, “B-Bye,” he’s already stepping back, flashing you one last grin before he turns on his heel.

Just like that, he’s swept away by a frantic crowd—managers, stylists, camera crew—phones and cameras snapping photos of him as he disappears down the hall.

And the second he’s out of sight—

Nari squeals.

After what feels like an eternity of hesitation, you finally ask one of the assistants, unsure of who to turn to. They give you a polite smile and direct you toward a hallway.

You follow them, your heart still racing from that moment in the main room. What just happened? Did he—did he really kiss you? It feels surreal, like it’s a little too much to process all at once.

The assistant leads you down a winding corridor, the sound of the concert beginning to build in the background. You expect to be led to some VIP seating area or a cushioned chair at least—something fancy, considering Jungkook had promised you a special spot.

But when you walk through a door, you’re met with nothing like you expected.

The private room is a whole new level of luxury. It’s spacious and minimalist, with sleek furniture and subtle lighting. The real kicker, though, is the window that stretches from floor to ceiling, offering you a perfect view of the stage. You can hear the crowd’s energy building outside, the thrum of excitement growing louder.

It’s like your own personal VIP box, but a hundred times better.

You stand there for a moment, blinking at the view. The wide window gives you an uninterrupted look at the entire stage, and the energy of the crowd below seeps through the glass. For a moment, you just stand there, soaking in the awe of it all. This isn’t just VIP seating. This is something else entirely.

Jungkook… You think, already feeling a little overwhelmed.

You turn to the manager, who gives you a polite nod before slipping out of the room, leaving you and Nari in stunned silence.

Nari’s the first to speak, her eyes wide as she takes in the view. “Oh my god…” she breathes, her voice barely above a whisper. You don’t even need to say anything—your jaw is just hanging as you both stare at the sheer scale of the concert.

The crowd outside? Absolutely wild. The entire arena is packed with people, their energy almost tangible from where you stand. And then, the fan chants.

It starts slowly, then builds, echoing through the room and vibrating against the glass like it’s alive. The fans’ synchronized voices send shivers down your spine. You can hear their collective excitement, feel their connection to every word, every syllable they sing. It’s intense. Electric.

You and Nari exchange a glance, and you can both feel it—the overwhelming magnitude of what you’re witnessing. This isn’t just a concert. This is a movement.

“They’re insane,” Nari mutters, still staring in awe. “Like… how is this even real?”

You don’t have words to answer her, too caught up in the sea of fans, the flashing lights, and the vibrant energy that fills the room. This is what Jungkook is a part of. This is his world. And, somehow, you’re in it.

You both finally settle into your seats, taking in the view for a moment longer before Nari starts snapping pictures. She’s practically hyperactive, constantly repositioning herself and you, demanding different angles. “No, no, this one! From this side, trust me!” she insists, handing you her phone to take a shot of her looking ‘candidly’ out at the crowd. You roll your eyes but go along with it with a smile, snapping a few photos before Nari’s satisfied with her little session.

Meanwhile, you find yourself casually picking at the snacks on the buffet table Jungkook probably had arranged for you. Some chips, a few pieces of fruit, a tiny sandwich here and there. Nothing fancy, but it’s definitely keeping your stomach busy as you wait.

Nari, on the other hand, is more focused on her phone, scrolling through pictures and checking messages, but every now and then, her eyes flit toward the stage. It’s a strange mixture of calm and chaos—here you are, in a private room with an impeccable view of everything, yet your mind keeps racing back to Jungkook.

The buzz of the crowd grows louder as more fans flood in, and you know the show is about to start. Slowly, the lights in the arena begin to dim, casting the room into a soft twilight. You sit up a little straighter, suddenly feeling the anticipation in the air. The world feels still for just a moment, before the chaos outside swells again, and you realize—this is it.

The concert is finally about to begin.

[yuurivoice]

THE big man,, the man who I constantly stalk because I’m thirsty for content, Mr. YuuriVoice,,, I gotta say…you are a master at making stories.

So I gotta ask, what kind of media did (or do) you also stalk/watch and gain your inspiration from?

I gotta know what kinda shit they be feeding you because OH MY LORD you got me tweaking (I’ve watched the most recent Lost & Found episode at least five times this week.)

Aw, thank you so much!

So, I'll try and go by eras of my life because I think they've all played a part in getting me to where I'm at. This is by no means a comprehensive list of all of my key inspirations, but definitely what has touched me and got me to where I am today.

Pre-Teens

A variety of fantasy books I've lost recollection of (RIP)

That one wizard book series I don't talk about anymore

Lord of the Rings via the films (pops insisted I read the Hobbit first, I wasn't into it, I found the writing wasn't really my vibe)

Batman the Animated Series (and various other Saturday morning cartoons tbh)

A variety of male-centric films, the two standouts being Gladiator and Tombstone. Also the Austin Power movies definitely aided my crude humor lmfao.

The Matrix!!!!

Final Fantasy VII, VIII, and IX

Assorted JRPGs, shoutout to the Suikoden I & II remaster I need to get my hands on!

Teens

aka my Hello Japan (and Trauma) era

Evangelion

Outlaw Star

Cowboy Bebop

Basically the entire Toonami block tbh let's be real

Princess Mononoke

Star Wars KOTOR

Kingdom Hearts 1 & 2

Steep decline in reading, save for that Wizard fuck.

Young Adulthood

aka Loveless Marriage + Where Did My Early 20's Go?

Fullmetal Alchemist (OG and Brotherhood)

Dragon Age

Mass Effect

Black Butler

Final Fantasy VII Crisis Core

Dexter (the serial killer, although I fuck with the boy genius as well)

Several years are fuzzy, I couldn't tell you if I digested anything else meaningful or inspirational until...

Adulthood

aka I woke up and started living again, the pre-YuuriVoice era

Game of Thrones

Breaking Bad (and eventually Better Call Saul)

Mob Psycho 100

Berserk

Various Studio Ghibli films

Tarantino movies

?????? similarly fuzzy but more to draw upon

Yuri On Ice

This was a fun exercise, and unfortunately kind of a bummer because I realize how much of my life is tucked behind a veil I've put up. I am certain that there were more core inspirations throughout the years, but I've lost them to the abstract of my mind. There was a shift in my adulthood towards being much more cautious about the media I take in because I was very bitter that I had not begun to create. I'd see something cool that was similar to the dreams I had of worlds I never put to paper and it would hurt me.

Eventually I began to create in earnest and remained cautious because I didn't want to be influenced or driven in one direction or another. So I'm selective about what I take in nowadays, and if it feels a little too close to where I'm going, I pass on it.

I don't know where the desire to preserve my vision and style came from, aside from the insecurity of creative jealousy. Though I think I'm beyond that now, and it's more of a case of me being enamored of the idea of tapping into the well of ideas and stories within me without muddying the waters with outside influence.

Film has been a safe medium, and I believe that reading again will help me unlock things I've kept away from myself for a long time. So that's where I'm at today.

[tinyboobsbignipples]

Hcs for Ellie dating someone with small boobs

N/A (Ignore if you want LMFAO): I think everyone is on board that Ellie is a boob girl, and I totally agree, but whenever I see a post about it, the writer never exactly clarifies what size they are giving the reader, but it is almost always obvious that it is targeted toward girls with a bigger chest. Some writers will even put something like ‘Ellie loves all sizes’ but will continue to only write details for bigger boobs. Which is totally fine. If big boobs are all you know how to write, then continue to do so. I still read them, and I enjoy doing so but sometimes it just feels a little invalidating..? I would also like to say that this isn't targeted at anyone, and this isn't meant to hate or call anyone out this is just something I've noticed as someone with a smaller chest.

Anyway, this is for the girls whose boobs don’t exactly drop or fall when they take their bra off.

WC: 900+

CW: Talks of NSFW at the bottom (separated from the rest of my hcs), I guess thats it?, established relationship.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Loves when you wear oversized shirts. Small boobs + oversized shirt = more room for Ellie's head to sneak her way into your shirt and listen to your heart beat. For the longest time, she would swear that this was the only way she could fall asleep but then summer came and it got too hot to do that anymore :( 

Got right back to it though when the weather started cooling down 

Ellie loves kissing the tops of your boobs when you wear a low cut shirt. If you don't wear low cut shirts often, she will give extra kisses in hopes that it will show how much she loves you and your body. If you wear them often, then you’ll be getting chest kisses just as much. 

You often tap her nose and say "Boop,” so one day when your nipples were poking through your shirt, she tapped one of them and said “Boop.” You both stared at each other in confusion until you broke and started giggling. You did the same thing to her because her nipples were also poking through her shirt

Loves hugging you. Because both of your guys boobs are small, you guys can get really really close to each other during hugs. Like nose touching close, every limb of your body is touching her, and if your noses weren't in the way, your guys would be able to give each other butterfly kisses. (When you flutter your eyelashes against someone else, in this case, ellies eyelashes.) 

Hugs every day, all day. She's so clingy, she needs to be touching you in some way or “she will die.” (her words) 

If you’re feeling really insecure about the size of your boobs, Ellie will try her best to comfort you. Shes a bit awkward and will often bring up how she has small boobs too and doesnt feel bad about them and sometimes that just makes you feel worse but it's the thought that counts. :’)

If you’re the type to wear tiny tops because your chest allows you to do so, Ellie would just have total heart eyes. She thinks you're so perfect and loves taking you out because she knows you’ll get all dressed up for her. 

Nsfw: 

On the topic of tiny tops (if you wear them), Ellie likes them because of easy access. It's so easy to just drag the fabric down or up, and bam, your chest is right there on display for her. 

The first time Ellie saw you without your top on, her pupils would just expand. She would kiss all over your boobs. Below, on top, right on, everywhere. She's so in love its embarrassing :')

On the rare occasion that you guys are away from each other, she’ll ask for a picture because “she needs to see them,” and you’ll make a joke something along the lines of ‘there's nothing to see’ and she will get so pouty because she's so needy, and you think this is an appropriate time to make jokes. 

You're sitting on Ellie's lap and riding her strap, you guys are face to face. If Ellie's hands are bigger than your chest, then I would imagine she would have her hands on your upper back or your side, right next to where your boobs are, because she likes to watch how they bounce. Even if it's not a lot, she still gets mesmerized. 

Ellie's phone background is a photo of you, holding the camera completely topless with Ellie behind you. Her head rests on your shoulder, and each of her hands is covering your boobs, acting like a bra. 

If you don't wear bras: Before you and Ellie were dating and you guys were just friends, she would try so hard not to stare. She would try focus so so hard on something else, but it was so difficult for her to look away when your nipples were just right there. Later, when she got home, she would touch herself because she practically already knew what your boobs looked like, and Ellie has a very active imagination.

Loves playing with your nipples. Before, during, after sex loves playing with them and loves hearing the little reactions you give her

Pinches your nipples during sex and can get pretty rough with it too 

After sex, when you two are just lying in bed, she will lay her head on your shoulder, put her palm over one of your boobs and just keep it there

Ellie loves sucking on your chest and your nipples. When it leaves a mark its just an added bonus.

She thinks its so hot when its just the two of you home alone and you're walking around in just a tank top proudly showing off the hickeys she gave you last night (and this morning)

[binniebakery]

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Non Idol AU Ex!Yeonjun x Gn!Reader, Angst ♡Warnings: no happy ending, not proofread, cursing, I'm almost 90% this is gender neutral but if there is a mistake please let me know! ♡A/N: im so sorry this took forever to come out gfdgjhksd but its here! since this is my first time writing angst I'm not sure how i feel about this one but.. that's me with all my yeonjun fics... lmfao enjoy

𝗡𝗼𝘄 𝗽𝗹𝗮𝘆𝗶𝗻𝗴: "Above the Chinese Restaurant" By Laufey 𝗡𝗼𝘄 𝗽𝗹𝗮𝘆𝗶𝗻𝗴: "Don't Let Me Go" By Cigarettes After Sex

0:09 ━●────────── 3:43 ◁ㅤ ❚❚ ㅤ▷

——-˖⁺. ༶ ❤︎ ⋆˙⊹ 𐦍 ˖⁺. ༶ ❤︎ ⋆˙⊹——-

There you lay in the quiet solitude of your dimly lit room. The only source of light being the soft glow of your bedside lamp and a candle that smelled of sandalwood and something oddly familiar.

The outside world remained silent, a contrast to the buzzing thoughts that swarmed your mind. Your new apartment was quiet, lonely, and grey. It was nights like these that had you reminiscing those warm summer days you spent in the city.

Glancing over at the nearest window, you find yourself in a moment of deja vu. You’ve been here before– in this position looking outside as you lay in bed.

Except this time you weren’t waiting for anyone, it was just you and the sound of your ticking clock as the arms slowly moved to the next hour.

Time always seems to go by quicker than you can notice.

Your mind wanders back through the corridors of your memories as you clutch the soft fabric of your comforter. You let out a deep sigh as you find yourself reliving those memories again.

It’s cozy, you have a wonderful view of the greenery outside, it’s spacious, it’s a safe neighborhood, and your apartment is brand new. All of this and you would think ‘how could anyone ask for more?’

You realize it all fails in comparison to those distant memories. It's quite foggy really, you can’t really remember them too well leaving you pondering if so much time had really slipped away from you.

Just like he did

𐙚 ‧₊˚ ⋅⋆｡°

July 8th, Summer.

You and Yeonjun were simply young and dumb. At least that's what your parents would always say. Two ambitious individuals who found each other at a time when it seemed like the world was against you both.

Your families were against you moving into the city, but you were both young and desperate to start a new life together. It took weeks of couch surfing but despite the financial issues, you both managed to find that small apartment right above that old, run-down Chinese restaurant.

That summer the whole neighborhood spoke of the new young couple moving in, though you two paid no mind. Yeonjun enjoyed the attention and you were willing to endure anything as long as nobody spoke ill of either of you.

You remember Yeonjun’s small car lugging your belongings up the hill, and the minute you two arrive he’s opening the passenger door and pulling you into a hug.

He’s spinning you around and you’ve never felt happier. The summer heat burned down and your skin had tanned an awful lot, causing you to feel insecure about the obscure tan lines you modeled.

Of course, Yeonjun complimented you to the moon and back, kissing every bit of skin while his own was left sunburned. He always made you feel special no matter the occasion.

This moment was no less different, that bright, toothy grin of his as he clumsily plops down to lay with you on your shared futon.

“Got a gig next week, gonna earn so much too, I’ll buy you dinner every day for the next month!” Your boyfriend exclaims with his arms in the air.

You laugh at his expressive antics, leaning towards him to pull him in for a tight embrace.

“Don’t worry about that jjunie, I don’t need fancy dinners from you.”

“But I wanna,” he pouts “I gotta do something to make up for you working so hard!”

“Alright but nothing too expensive, we should be saving up..” You raise an eyebrow as Yeonjun makes himself comfortable laying his head in your lap.

“Mm, we’ll see” he chuckles and despite him burying his face into your thighs you can see the way his grin grows ever-so wider.

𐙚 ‧₊˚ ⋅⋆｡°

While Yeonjun chased his dream of being the biggest rockstar the world had ever known, you worked as a dishwasher just downstairs and occasionally picked up any odd jobs you could find when you had the time.

You didn’t mind being the breadwinner– after all, you were content just being by your lover's side.

Yeonjun would come home in the early hours of the morning, returning from his latest gig that his small band managed to grab.

He’d quietly push open the door to your apartment, he'd set his guitar down with care on the floor and slip off his boots as silently as he could manage, mindful not to disturb your sleep after a long day of work.

He was always a gentleman, slipping beneath the covers beside you and gently pressing a tender kiss to your forehead as a silent apology for the missed "goodnight" texts he always promised to send but always ended up being too busy with his performances.

Your life with him wasn’t perfect, but regardless you had everything you could ever need.

It didn’t matter that the water always ran cold during the winter, the lack of heat or cool air circulation, the thin walls and loud neighbors, the constant sound of sirens running through the streets at night, or even the unstoppable growing mold in the corner of your bathroom.

You two were happy regardless of the trials this life had brought you.

𐙚 ‧₊˚ ⋅⋆｡°

September 30th, Fall

You’re clutching that same old soft comforter, except this time echoes of soft laughter and plates clinking could be heard bouncing off the thin walls of your humble apartment.

Yeonjun lights the candle he had just bought, the scent of sandalwood filling the air as he finds his way to you.

“If you listen closely you can hear Mr. Wang snoring” Yeonjun whispers as he snuggles closer to your shaking form in an attempt to warm you both.

You toss another dumpling into your mouth and grin.

“Sometimes I wish that was all we heard at night. I don’t know how much longer I can stand his bed creaking on Fridays..” You snicker and that was all it took for your boyfriend to burst into a fit of giggles.

“Shhh! My love please!” You whisper loudly as you lean over your shared futon to cover his mouth.

Yeonjun holds back tears as he attempts to regain composure. You grab a dumpling from your plate and shove it into his mouth.

Your boyfriend happily munches as you sigh, a wide smile on your face despite wanting to be annoyed. “You think the restaurant will give us more if I head back down?” He looks down at his empty plate, stomach rumbling and his eyes look back at you. His face resembled a child getting caught doing something they weren’t supposed to, guilty look on his face.

You find yourself giggling at how cute he looks, hand reaching to gently caress his cheek. Yeonjun smiles and lets the food in his mouth peek out slightly.

“Aw jjunie thats gross!” You laugh, pushing him away.

Yeonjun laughs as well, cheekbones popping out in all their glory from the way his smile extends impossibly more and you feel yourself falling even more impossibly in love.

That ends up being how the both of you spend the rest of your night, attempting to remain silent so as not to get another noise complaint. Sharing jokes and silent tickle fights, the perfect distraction against the autumn weather.

If only your nights stayed like this forever.

𐙚 ‧₊˚ ⋅⋆｡°

February 22nd or 23rd? You could never really remember the date.

Despite winter soon making it’s leave, you stay stuck inside the restaurant building with Yeonjun as the winter storm still roars on outside.

“Jjunie! I’m home!” You chirp as you open the door to your apartment.

Yeonjun looks up from his phone, laying on the worn couch you had both found on someone’s lawn with a sign that said ‘please take’. Despite your sour look Yeonjun somehow managed to convince you both to take it “looks like it’s still in good condition to me” he awkwardly smiled as he wiped off the remaining dust. 

You shake your head smiling at the memory.

“Hey, you. How was work?” He smiles and pats the empty spot next to him for you to sit.

“Same old, but it wasn’t that busy today. I even managed to take a nap in the freezer before Mr Wang noticed me.” You grinned.

Yeonjun lets out a chuckle and you crawl into his lap, resting your head on his shoulder.

He opens the blanket he was currently wrapped in and invites you in to join him in his little burrito.

You bury your face into his neck, inhaling that familiar scent you grew to love. Yeonjun places a hand on your back and rubs small circles as he plants a kiss on your hairline.

“Hey, I know that you’ve been out a lot. You know– busy with band stuff, but do you think you could maybe get a small side gig to help us out?” You looked at him with a nervous smile.

You knew Yeonjun took his band career seriously. He did everything he could to help, taking any small gig he and his bandmates could find. But most of the time it just felt like it wasn’t enough to pay the bills.

“Baby… we talked about this before.. You know I–” 

Before Yeonjun can finish his response, your conversation gets interrupted.

Creak

“What the–”

“Is that the roof?” Yeonjun squints his eyes as he looks at the wooden planks above him. You both sit in silence staring upwards, waiting for the odd sound to play again.

Nothing.

“Huh..” You lift yourself off your boyfriend and stand in the middle of your tiny living room, eyes still concentrated on trying to figure out where the sound was coming from.

..Creak…

“Ah shit–! Y/n look out!” Yeonjun jumps off the couch and grabs your wrist, pulling you towards him as part of your roof collapses right on top of the spot you were standing on. A fresh blanket of snow pouring in.

“Holy fuck, fuck fuck fuck–”

“Y/n are you okay?! Did you get hurt?!” His hands grab your face and his eyes are scanning for any injuries.

“I- I’m fine but our roof just fucking caved in!??! Shit, I could have been crushed!” Your jaw was practically dropped at the situation.

Yeonjun pulls away and walks towards the pile of wood and snow to assess the damage.

And as if right on cue, another fresh blanket of snow falls right on top of him. “AH!” Yeonjun yells, shaking off the remaining snow sitting on his head.

“Stupid fucking roof! I hate this damn apartment, not only do we not have any heat but we don’t even have a roof!”

“Pffft–!”

Yeonjun looks over and sees your face almost red, doubled over as you tried your best to keep in your laughter and he can’t help but feel his anger dissipate at the sight.

He hadn’t seen you laugh or smile like this in a while.

“You–! you look so stupid right now– I’m sorry!” You breathe out, falling on the couch as you let out a heavy laugh.

Your boyfriend beams, seeing you like this was better than any blanket or heater. His heart skips as you pull him in to lightly dust off the remaining snow.

So what if it took half of your savings jar and Yeonjun sacrificing almost a whole night of sleep to fix the roof? Every penny and splinter was worth seeing that priceless smile of yours.

𐙚 ‧₊˚ ⋅⋆｡°

April 3rd, Spring. After two weeks of nonstop work, you finally had a day off the same day Yeonjun was home for the day.

You took the opportunity to splurge and eat in. You put on your favorite movie as you folded both of your laundry, Yeonjun making comments every now and then, pausing to get up and check on the stew you were making.

You found yourself wishing your days were like this more often. You knew he was busy and you respected that he wanted to chase his dreams, and who were you to get in the way of that?

Unbeknownst to you, Yeonjun had been silent the last few minutes.

Suddenly, you feel his figure scoot behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist. “One day I’m gonna make enough money for us to get out of this dump.” He mumbles into your neck.

“Huh?” You looked up from the pile of clothing that you were attending to.

“You heard me, I’m gonna make it big. The day that I do, I’m gonna buy you brand new clothes, a cute dog, we’re gonna live in a mansion, and then get married.”

Your face flushes and you smile. This was the first time Yeonjun had ever mentioned marriage to you.

“Yeah?”

“Mhm, gonna be the biggest star this world will ever know. My face is gonna be plastered on every billboard. Then, we’ll have kids.. and then when I��m too old to perform, we’re gonna be so rich you’ll never have to work another day in your life” he grins.

“Feeling a little ambitious are we?” You giggle, raising an arm to pat his head. His hair felt soft, it had been so long since you ran your fingers through it. You find yourself closing your eyes as you begin to imagine your ideal future.

“Say whatever you want. It’s gonna happen!” Yeonjun raises a fist in the air, as if giving a speech to a crowd and you feel as if you couldn’t have been more in love with him in that moment.

One day, he’s gonna be in front of a real crowd, the largest one he’s ever seen, and you swear you’ll be front row cheering him on.

𐙚 ‧₊˚ ⋅⋆｡°

May 16th, Spring.

You throw his bag down in frustration. “So this entire fucking time you were just going out and having fun? Drinking with your bandmates while I’m here working my ass off trying to keep a roof over our heads?!”

Yeonjun sighs and grits his teeth.

“No. I’m not just going out and having fun. Yes, I admit! Sometimes we’re out of luck and Soobin can’t get us a fucking gig. We go to a place and have a few drinks to destress, but I promise you I am trying my hardest! I do everything I can to get a shitty gig, I hang out with other douchebag bands so we can get connections y/n! Con-nec-tions! You ever fucking heard of that?!”

Another argument, the 4th night in a row.

This time you were cleaning around the apartment, finding Yeonjun’s bag as he took his shower before heading out for the evening to meet with his bandmates. ‘A huge meeting talking about an upcoming event they’re going to perform at’ he claimed.

You open his bag, knowing that he’d appreciate you cleaning up the trash he had inside. He trusted that you wouldn’t toss any of his half-written lyrics or important documents anyway.

That’s when you see it, three– no four– crumble receipts inside the inner pocket. You unscramble them to see they’re all charges from bars. Not just the same one, but multiple, containing only large orders of alcoholic drinks with the occasional snack to go along.

Anger consumes you before you think rationally, and as Yeonjun walks out of the shower with just a towel around his waist shaking his wet black hair, you shove the receipts in his face.

After minutes of back and forth, the tension grows immensely thicker. And before you both even notice, it all turns into a yelling match. 

He explains that it’s due to him not being able to find proper gigs as of recently, and how drinking will destress him, going off on a rant about how it’s normal in the industry to drink with managers and other bands to get a good rep. “Do you even fucking care about us!? We live in a dump! I had to call someone to fix our dishwasher three times last month! What if I get fired or laid off? We’re just gonna live on the fucking streets?! Be realistic Yeonjun! Be fucking realistic!”

“Maybe the issue is you don’t care y/n.. You just don’t understand that I’m serious! I’m taking this shit all seriously! I’m sorry I can’t find a proper job right now, but I need just more time.. And if you can’t respect my dream then honestly.. Maybe I should just fucking go right now for good.”

You couldn’t even respond. The tears in your eyes began to drip down and Yeonjun could only watch as your eyebrows furrow more, face scrunching up in an attempt to hide the frustration you were feeling.

He knew you hated crying, especially in front of him.

Had your eye bags always been so deep?

Yeonjun’s lips part and you hear his breath hitch the second it all starts crashing down on him. 

He stares at how disheveled your hair is. The way your skin looked so pale and almost blue under the dim light of the moon from your opened blinds. He remembers the way he used to kiss up your sunkissed arm the first few months you both moved into your tiny apartment. Letting the sun shine through the windows as you both danced slowly to whatever bossanova song played through your vintage radio.

Those first few months of summer were golden. They were warm like your skin on his when he woke up in the morning to you with his arms wrapped around your waist. Now your skin looked cold, dull, and you looked stretched thin.

How could he have just noticed all this? He was living with you the whole time.

In reality, he stopped being present a long time ago.

𐙚 ‧₊˚ ⋅⋆｡°

The following days Yeonjun was nowhere to be seen.

You cried every day, constantly looking over to the door to see if he would just waltz in, big grin as he held a golden contract to a label over your head. You glanced over at the couch often, expecting your lover to be sitting as usual on his phone or hunched over writing whatever lyrics he could muster.

You called and texted but no response was ever given. Even if you had a car, not that walking would stop you, you had no idea of his whereabouts. Where would you even begin to look?

Then finally at the end of the week, Yeonjun returns home.

You weren’t there when he arrived, you still had to work despite the fact that things were rough. So when you return that night, all that’s left is your stuff and a note.

To my dearest y/n, Sorry for everything. I hope you understand that I need to do things my way right now. This is stupid but I'm sure you can imagine where this is going. Maybe in the future we’ll find each other again, but as of right now, I have to leave. If you need me you have my number,  See you around baby -Yeonjun

𐙚 ‧₊˚ ⋅⋆｡°

Shortly after, you find yourself moving out of that old apartment. You never texted or called Yeonjun, and he never did so to you either.

As time goes by and the seasons pass, you can’t help but wonder where he ended up.

Did he continue to seek that dream he always wanted?

Maybe being with you was his biggest dream all along,

He just didn’t know it then.

Deep down Yeonjun wished he could have shown his appreciation for you more. How much he wished to give you a better life, to be a better boyfriend. How much he wished that on those nights when he’d arrive late in the morning hours, you’d wake up to see him giving you those gentle kisses, or how he’d double check to make sure the blanket was properly covering your sleeping figure.

Oh, how Yeonjun would never know about those faded photographs you still have saved from your old polaroid camera. Both of you with wide smiles as you sat in the pile of snow in the middle of your living room. You often found yourself wishing you could go back. Go back to when things were simpler, go back to that summer you moved in that tiny apartment.

As these nights go on, so does time. Therefore the tears that you find yourself wiping away eventually dry, and you let these memories go with a sigh. They carry themselves away along with the gentle breeze that whispers through your open window. And as that sandalwood candle’s wick flickers out, you realize so does the love you once held for him.

[yinyuedijun]

hihi mao!! i am slinking into your inbox to ask how tokyo vice suo likes to spoil you.... is he a grand gestures kind of man or does he keep it more lowkey and subtle when he's feeling extra sappy? how do you know when he's feeling extra in-his-feelings about you? uwu

HI BITTI !!!! reading this ask should not have made me kick my feet and giggle, but it totally did 😔 I shall answer for hostess reader & suo because when I think about myself dating tokyo vice suo I feel like I'll combust AGLDHDKDJ

I think tokyo vice suo likes to spoil you 24/7 in very grand ways as a secondhand trauma response to your previous financial insecurity ♥️ but when he's extra in-his-feelings I do think he is very lowkey about it. he mostly goes out of his way to spend time with you because he knows you have abandonment issues enjoy that a lot. I think he particularly likes baking for you because it's something he enjoys that he never gets to do anymore, and it also makes him feel like you two are a normal married couple :')

funnily enough, in the original version of the fic, there was a scene where you visit suo in his office (to yell at him) after he's been away for a long time (killing people). he's missed you a lot and wants to make it up to you, so he starts asking what dessert you'd like to eat and says he'll take tomorrow off and spend it baking with you. bro fully pulls out a paper notebook and pencil and starts writing up a grocery list for shopping in the morning. in the meantime, his buddies are sitting around doing meth (suo does not partake due to his strict diet) and his hands are still kinda bloody from the hit so his grocery list ends up stained with it. it was too absurd of a scene so I changed it LMFAO but that's basically what suo does when he really wants to make you feel loved: takes a vacation from killing people and becomes your househusband 😭

[ggyutarist]

A Mask, Bedecked in White Crystals ✧˖°.

(Halloween Special!)

💫: Beomgyu x GN Reader

Content: Masquerade ball and you dance with Beomgyu yahay!! Strangers to ??? to enemies.

‼️: Use of knife (but no one is stabbed). Slight cursing.

WC: 2.1k (oh my god i yapped.)

A/N: hehe short (not short) halloween special!! all i ever write about is beomgyu lmfao sorry. this is lowkey cliche and lame but like…who cares..ykyk. Its fine. Idk if this counts as halloween lols. Not sure if I should tag it as fluff or angst. Well its not fluff so angst ig?? But its not rlly sad. I think?… idk you guys give the verdict. not proofread sorry😞 (bru gotta put this below here bc its too long and yall wont see the actual summary help)

The annual All Hallows’s Eve Ball has arrived once again. Hosted on the 31st of October, the lavish and fancy would be invited to come in the most extravagant gowns and suits. They would be encouraged as well to adorn their faces with masks that were dipped in saturated colors.

Too saturated, you thought. You managed to bag yourself an invite, not that it was difficult. You were always invited every year. It’s just this year, you have to attend. Let’s say…there’s a few matters that needs to be addressed. 

Though, back to the topic at hand, how do these overly bright colors not hurt anyone’s eyes? Some of them will be far too egoistic and come in the most obnoxiously fancy dresses you’ve ever seen. They act as if they’re attention-seeking harlots who constantly need eyes at them or else they’ll die. You tsk at the behavior of some people but it is what it is, unfortunately. The world was doomed from the very start so might as well get rid of those who make it worse.

Twisting the glass in your hand, you bring it up to your face to watch the drink whirl around. Well, it was certainly a better taste than last year. A bit more sweeter side but still leaving a strong taste on your tongue. Despite all this, you yawn due to your lack of interest in this ball. It’s the same thing every year, honestly. No wonder why people usually bring a plus one. The inexorable desire of humans for connections with others, you sigh at it. Let’s be real here. They’re just setting themselves up for a heartbreak. Let it be a heartbreak from the betrayal of a romantic interest—or fallouts from friendships.

You gave up on those long, long ago. Why would you or anyone for the matter, set themselves up for a relationship that’s bound to fail? That’s just blatantly stupid. You wouldn’t blame them if it were their first time, of course. How would they foresee that? A second time would be understandable because we all give second chances in life. A third is questionable but still tame. Maybe they’re just too desperate for that person. A fourth and beyond though…now that’s just wrong. They must be let go of. Before long, they’ll just do more harm than good.

But maybe, in this world where trust is lost easily, there are just some who turns out to be overly desperate. Perhaps, they lost everything to the point that this certain someone is their only reason left to live.  You made sure to never stoop down that low. You learned to live for no one else but yourself. Looking around, guess not all learns that. It was difficult, yes, considering you valued others’ worth more than your own but this world is just shit, okay? It’s just really that bad that you lost all care for the rest of them. This world is so, so big but others just make it seem so small and suffocating. It’s like they’re stealing all the air for themselves and leaving the rest to collect dust. 

Who knows? It could be the reason you ended up with a job like this. To rid this world of mistakes and burdens. No, not those who feel like a mistake and burden. We’re all insecure at some point in life, it’s okay. The only ones you shall discard of would be those who proved themselves as a hindrance to the bettering of this earth. Are you evil for this? Perhaps, depending on the person asked. If you were to answer this…it’s simple. You are merely a human getting rid of evil counterparts. 

The line between good and bad may seem to have blurred but it’s alright. Whatever brings the saving of this world, you will do. Even if it throws a few morals out the window. I mean, what’s the bad thing here? Disposing of, mind you, evil people? Without them, this place we live on will be so much better. What’s the reason to keep them? They’ll only make everyone’s lives miserable. But of course, not all sees through that. That’s why you’re here. You will so graciously lend your services and discard of them. Throw them to the fires of hell and make them repent for their sins.

You’re not Satan on earth, no. You only serve as the bridge between earth and hell. You guide these low-lives and then let the demon decide of their fate down there.

The sudden music change brings you back to this earth that you dread so much, snapping you out of your thoughts. You sigh, looks like everyone’s going for a dance. You can’t be bothered so you resort to staring down at your drink again, hidden away in some corner. Your mask slips off the bridge of your nose, prompting you to push it back up again. Once you do so, you lift up your head to find someone approaching you. Okay…that’s bad. You didn’t want to attract any form of attention on you so why is this guy going here??

He stops a few feet away from you and gracefully bows a 90 degrees. While keeping still, he holds out his hand, eyes peeking out of his masked face to yours as a silent invitation. You contemplate. Well, this is certainly random…but why the fuck not? He seems nice. Did a bow, left space between you two, and he’s pretty. Yes, there’s a mask but shhh. It’s quite obvious he’s pretty under that…thing that’s covering his face. Not like this was against the rules for you. All you had to do was do the job properly. This won’t be an inconvenience, right?

You press your fingertips against his own before sliding your hand down to his palm. He wraps his fingers around your hand and pulls you close. You take note of how warm his hand seems to be. It could just be you though. Been a while since you’ve done this so your skin could just be burning up from the close proximity. Right?…

You come back, once again, to earth as you feel your hand being lifted up to the air. You turn your head towards him and sees him give you a thin-lipped smile with whisker dimples.

Cute…

You’re seriously not falling for a stranger right now, are you? You mentally shake your head and prop your other hand on his shoulder, likewise his hand found itself on your waist. He guides you both to join the rest on the dance floor, full of dresses twirling and shoes clacking against the polished floor. 

And so…you danced. Miraculously, you haven’t stepped on each other’s shoes yet or rather you on his. He seemed experienced, decently enough that is. You managed to follow his footwork to the beat of the notes, spinning around at just the perfect time. He stretched out his arm before pulling you back to him again, trapping you both in a constant spin.

While the world was nothing more than a motion blurred, he remained the center of your vision. It’s only been a good amount of minutes, so why does it feel like you knew him since forever? The way the hands feel familiar, the way you somehow recognize his smile…why? You seem to can’t wrap your head around it. Nevertheless, you dance. The dance feels so heavy now that you get some sort of deja vu around this person. What could it possibly be? What—

You feel an elbow bump into you. Turns out you two were too absorbed in this dance that you fell behind the rhythm of the others. You watch him bow his head quickly, muttering a sorry to the other pair before turning his head to whisk you away.

It could be you. It could really be you but you just can’t seem to miss the mole that lies on his cheek. There’s no way. There’s just simply no way it’s him. You glance up to his eyes, ones that still looking away to find you both a space on this crowded dance floor. His lashes, it can’t be missed. They’re considerably longer than most people. So…could it be him?

You grip his hand tighter and start leading the dance yourself. Just trying to see something, you keep that repeating in your mind. You start taking the dance a bit too seriously, making him amused at the contortion of your face to focus. A giggle emits from his lips and your heart drops. Full on drops to the pit of your stomach. That giggle is too recognizable. You quickly look for a secluded place and led him there. Obviously, he’s extremely confused like haha…why are we going behind a random pillar at the side of the ballroom?

Each step broke a piece of your heart. How? How could’ve you fallen for him again? Is this not the same person who continuously broke your damned heart? Even as a stranger, you still managed to somehow keep a memory of him with you. Despite him leaving, you still held desperately onto that red thread that connects you and him. What you only realized far too late was that…yours was tied to your pinky in a pretty bow. While him? He held onto the other end with a loose grip. Pfft, he only needed you for his own selfish reasons.

You scoffed. You scoffed at your own stupidity. Maybe, perhaps…you weren’t as different as any other. In this world, we are all humans who are doomed to have this trivial shit called feelings. The desperation, at this point, is inevitable. The longing, as much as you hate to admit it, is rooted deep into your heart. You can’t dig it out as much as you want to. The only best thing you could do is keep piling things on it till it’s out of sight. Out of sight, out of mind. Just pray…it won’t get unearthed somehow.

Unfortunately for you, that’s what happened today. All your memories with this…bastard…got unearthed when it’s meant to be buried deep into your soul. It’s heavy to carry but whatever gets it out of the way. 

You still liked him. You still liked him.

Tears threaten to spill out of your eyes but you stop it. You cried too many times over him to the point you learned how to dry it without excessive blinking. Never again shall you show such a weak and pitiful side of yourself. It only brings hurt than comfort. A place filled with numbness…is better than a place filled with hurt and no one to provide you comfort.

You pulled him in behind the pillar along with you. All sense of love and genuine contentment from the dance are gone. No, you will not let him give you empty promises of happiness again. So to avoid that, you turn him around forcefully and shove him up against the pillar, eliciting a pained groan from him. 

He opens his mouth to retort but before that even happens…

You slowly bring out something sharp, something meticulously cleaned just for this situation that is unfolding before you. You slide the spine of the knife against his back, not sharp enough to cut skin but definitely enough to create goosebumps. You giggle at the tensing of his body and breath hitching, making you all the more tempted to slide the sharp object down his spine.

To the floor, the shadow of you two may seem like you’re still absorbed in the dance you’re sharing with him. A strange yet familiar feeling blossoming in your chest to which the dance attempted to pour out. But to the wall, the shadow consists of you trapping him with no way out with a weapon against his back. One wrong move from him and the said weapon will take his precious life. You’re certain he wouldn’t want that but just to be sure…

You lean in and whisper a moniker that maybe not all who attended this ball know. Maybe he wanted to be known by a less common appellation but that wouldn’t work on you.

“You and your cowardice. Going after a fake name still?”

You’re met with an unnerving silence. Though, you digress. This continued silence just proves all the more that you found him. You drag the knife up his back painstakingly slow. Once it reaches the back of his head where the strings lie, you slash it in one fell swoop. A mask, bedecked in white crystals, falls to the ground with a thud. That mask no longer belongs to him; just like his dignity.

“You know you’re done for once you see me, Choi Beomgyu.”

A/N: happy halloween!!😸😸 (we’ll ignore the fact that idk what i was writing). this one sucked so badly but its aight. consider it a cliffhanger so…potential part 2…if you guys want.

rushed bc gotta post on actual halloween😔

[muikitoo]

hey so how do you think the rottmnt boys would deal with having a s/o looks very happy to see them, who hugs and kisses them and says “hi handsome” as a greeting and then they quickly slide away from their boyfriend side before the boys can even react to what just happened every single time? How do they first react to such a thing? And what about when they are used to it and see it coming every time s/o is coming over?

Them with an affectionate s/o

Warnings

None, pure fluff

+ this request from the same person

"Oh forgot to add. With the greetings request, I would like it so this s/o is a sneak attack loving greeting type, but then after they slide away they don’t initiate affection for rest of the day. like they get the affection all out of their system with the greeting, kind of don’t have energy for more and the boys have to initiate for the rest of the day, s/o will happily reciprocate though?"

A/N:

Im sorry this took so long!! Ive been awfully busy lately. But this was super fun to write<3

Donnie

- Hes super surprised (and got scared shitless).

- Please warn him next time you sneak attack him with affection, this boy almost went into cardiac arrest 😭

- "Sweet Galileo, Y/N! Please warn me next time, my soul almost left my shell for a moment."

- He doesnt rlly like it at first but He'll let it slide from time to time.

- After some time, he'll get used to it.

- He doesnt mind you calling him "handsome"

- actually it boosts his ego a lot, he likes it more than he'll ever admit.

-He gets a bit confused when you suddenly slide away and immediately notices that you dont show affection for the rest of the day

-tries not to put it into much thought though.

- Eventually he does ask you and understands if u dont have energy for more after the sneak attacks.

- Since he doesnt really initiate affection, when he eventually does, s/o would most likely reciprocate. If not, he'll take note of that and make sure youre 100% comfortable next time

Leo

- He does not mind the sneak attacks

- He gets slightly shocked for a moment since he didnt expect it, but it quickly washes away and he reciprocates your affection.

- He gives u affectionate sneak attacks too!!

- Absolutely LOVESS when you call him "handsome" or when you call him anything atp, you could call him a dumbass and he'll be head over heels for you.

- it boosts his ego so so muchh, he literally will NOT stop teasing you

- "Aww you seriously cant get your hands off of me can you?" *You literally slap him lmfao"

- believe me, you wont be left alone cuz he'll act like a baby. And if u dont pay attention to him he'll start whining and bothering u until you do.

- like Donnie, he gets confused when you just randomly slide away afterwards

- He probably doesnt notice how you dont show affection after greeting him, since hes most likely always close to you.

- if someone points it out though, he'll realise it and ask you about it. (Hes honestly a bit insecure and scared in case hes annoying you or something)

- if you reassure him its just cause you dont have enough energy, he'll feel a lot better.

- But either way he loves giving u any kind of affection, so you better reciprocate or he'll pout and whine like a child who couldnt get the toy they wanted.

Mikey

- He loves your greetings, they make him feel so bubbly inside.

- He most likely greets you that way too.

- ADORES when you call him handsome, he literally melts. Will call you pretty/handsome back. (or whatever you prefer)

- "*literally melting into a puddle* you think im cute? Aww well, i think youre the prettiest person ive ever layed my eyes on."

- After the first three he does notice how you slide away and dont show affection for a while.

- Immediately asks you about it before you manage to slide away.

- He doesnt mind, but that wont stop him from giving YOU sneak attacks.

- Even if hes the one giving affection, he doesn't mind at all. He just loves being near you at all times.

- LOVES it when you reciprocate, but if you dont he'll have a talk with you about it and find out what kind of affection you like and what you dont like.

Raph

- I feel like he has reflexes and instincts so be careful when trying to sneak attack him

- when i tell you - one tail swing and youre gone, i mean it.

- if that ever happens he'll immediately apologise and literally do anything to make it up to you, probably sobbed once out of guilt

- Now he tries his best not to swing his tail so much and lower his guard around you more.

- He would love to sneak attack you back but hes insanely scared of hurting u considering the size difference.

- Melts when you call him handsome or other nicknames, literally just a giant puppy.

- "you think Raph is handsome?" *Flustered and his ginormous tail is wagging*

- At first he doesnt notice that you stop giving affection after the greetings, but eventually he FINALLY does(slow much)

- Like the rest of his brothers, he'll ask you about it but wont go much into the convo.

- He probably already had a talk abt what kind of affection you'd reciprocate and stuff, bros respectful and sets strict boundaries frfr

[ashsostrange]

"averagegirlie" is just "xxoxobree", formerly known as "breeandhermunches" on a burner. newsflash, your "fav" miles writer isn't who you think she is!

ik a lot of us must be VERY confused so let me help you out. @/averagegirlie and @/xxoxobree are the same mfkn person! why did bree make this account? i assume that it's so she could fend for herself and keep the "unbothered" act up on her main page. that's why she deletes all her reblogs after arguing w someone then comes over to this account to start bsing. not to mention she can say extremely problematic things with no repercussions, because she doesn't have a following on that page + it's not tied to her.. at least it wasn't before! bree's a very messy liar. i peeped the truth so lemme share it w y'all.

bree if you're seeing this, go take a couple shots before you read. you should've kept it cute but you didn't, so let's get nasty mf.

i have receipts! let's start right here cz i find this the funniest:

nobody but her spells "internet" like that... this is one of the many examples of the two accounts talking alike, even though bree said she wouldn't refer to "yao" as a friend when the whole rashad thing was going down. yesterday, i reminded yao of that. she said "i like bree, so what" but she deleted that and changed it to "when are y'all gonna catch on to the fact that we talk?" mhm.. bree's a lil confused, but next!

y'all see "yao's" tag? telling alexa to play some bs... then y'all see bree?? NEXT!

go look on miss average's page. she only comes online to defend and ride the hell out of bree's dick. remember ts w amani? why are you going so hard for someone who says they dk you like that LMFAO. not to mention, when the rashad shit was happening, bree said "this my girl and she never been wrong" but then she turns around and says "i wouldn't say we're friends" WHICH ONE IS IT MISS MUNCH??! 😭🤣🤣 next!

why we praising tf out of bree's oc? ts was ai bro. we got a self supafan. next...

look at this smart anon, putting tg the pieces and shit. "ash and dalia fight your battles every time" is literally.. a lie. what battles are we referring to? talia's never in drama as much as you're implying. and ima ride for my friends anyway, tf? but my entire blog will never be centered around ONE human being. it ain't that serious ever. "yao" and bree need hobbies cz writing obv ain't doing it for her. next.

bree has also said she's messy lol. she likes drama. hm!

look at how she came on her white horse when bree was battling the great war w anons over miles morales smut (which i don't fw, js to be clear.) who summoned her? BREE LMFAIOFHDGFKJAS... NEXT!!!

here's miss xxoxo munches being ableist, much like her alter ego. bro went silent and blocked lia after this. now let's get into miss average again.

look at this bs. ion even gotta say much.. this girl is black & not chinese!! y'all should know why this is weird. here's the "evidence" she gave me btw:

here's me proving her wrong! she tried! next.

y'all see the way they're tagging their posts w their usernames? mhm.. ik you do.

HMMM....

these are both bree. i don't mean to bring up maye again, but i have to for context. what happened wasn't js "drama"... the things she said to dalia were racist + that post she was lyin' about lia in. she also liked the post.. dead giveaway you silly bitch! 🥱 nd she was also instigating in honey's inbox. i know her typing style and her emoji colors lol. it's common sense atp. it's not hard to tell when an anon is bree. and from what i'm seeing not even maye is fw her.. LMFAISAIDHSAY GIRL YOU'RE DONE! 😭 feel free to go thru their accs, you'll see ts too. she's funny asf for this, i'll give her that and that only. i've never laughed so much in under 24 hours. 💓

in conclusion, bree is messy, bored, insecure, ableist & miserable! she thought nobody would ever find out but here we are today. she fronts not gaf but then switches to this acc to let off some serious steam... as miss freeman once said: "Alexa, play yikes!"

but bless bree 💗 maybe if you change now, you'll still be able to collect your tokens like dalia says.

[ashwhowrites]

i’ve had this idea for the longest time but i don’t have the time or skills to write it well>:(

bratty!eddie being jealous of reader being friends with steve. maybe they’re having a game/movie night with friends or even just baking together and steve does something particularly flirty and eddie tries to stand his ground and show that it’s upset him but it manifests in a childish sort of tantrum. (yk, as the lil mf does lmfao) and reader is a little upset with eddie until steve makes an unkind comment about eddie’s reaction, and she’s suddenly defending eddie w her life, cause no one talks about /her/ boy

tldr; i have mommy issues and i projected it onto you. i am so sorry

If there is anyone who loves someone that's got Mommy issues, it's definitely me. Don't feel sorry about projecting it on me ;)

Bratty Eddie is my baby so I'll definitely write it &lt;3

Eddie didn't mind that Y/N had friends...well he did but he wouldn't say that. He wanted to be the only focus her attention was set on. But he understood that isn't always possible. She had a job, she had coworkers, and she had a life outside of Eddie. He didn't relate to that. He breathed her and that was all he needed. He didn't care to have friends or go to work for hours at a desk job. He wanted all his hours devoted to her.

And when she said she was inviting a work friend over for dinner, he promised to be on his best behavior. She made a list of all the things she needed from the store, sending her sweet boy off to run her errand while she went to work.

Eddie didn't want to let her down, so he accepted the list and ran off to the store. Collecting every item she wrote down, blushing at the little descriptions of what the item would look like. He snuck a few candies that definitely were not on the list.

Once he returned home, he put all the groceries away. He started to get their house together, knowing the cleaning part was his to do during the days that she worked. She wanted it extra clean for the guest. Eddie didn't question the guest. He figured it was a woman she worked with and wanted to make a good impression.

He made sure to shower and tie his hair back. Staying clear of smoking any weed or cigarettes to make the house smell funky. He dug through his closet to find his fancier shirts. Grabbing a dark blue button-up and black jeans.

Eddie was putting on his rings when he heard the front door open. A huge smile on his face as he raced to the living room.

"Mommy!" He cheered excitedly, rushing to give her a kiss.

"Hi, baby. You look handsome as ever" she smiled, pecking his lips.

"Thank you," he said shyly, feeling his cheeks turn red.

"Steve is coming in two hours so I have to start dinner right away. You want to help?" She asked, walking into the kitchen to wash her hands.

But Eddie was stuck on the name. Steve sounded like a boy's name. She invited a man over for dinner?

"um, Steve?" Eddie squeaked out. He didn't want to sound as insecure as he felt. Was Steve attractive? Did he like her? How did they meet?

"Yeah! He works at my office. He's training under me for a position so I invited him over to get to know each other." She shrugged like it was no big deal. But Eddie was going off the walls.

"He's training with you? As in he'll be following you around the whole time at work?" Eddie questioned.

"Yeah, but it's no big deal. I'm all yours." She reminded him, pressing a kiss to his cheek.

~~~

Turns out Steve was gorgeous and Eddie hated that. He had a pretty boy smile and charming eyes. Eddie grew more nervous as he saw similarities between him and Steve. Dark hair to go with their dark eyes, both have a nerdy sense of humor, and both have that look of adoration in their eyes when they look at Y/N.

If Y/N was attracted to Eddie, there's a big chance she would be attracted to Steve too.

Eddie pouted all throughout dinner. Listening to Steve's countless stories, all of them making him sound like the most perfect man in the world. Eddie hated the way it made him so insecure.

He hated the way Y/N's eyes followed Steve's every move as he told a story, her attention locked in on him.

Once they finished dinner, Steve offered to help with the dishes.....suck up. Eddie always got to help with the dishes.

But Y/N welcomed the help and both worked on the dishes by the kitchen sink. Eddie watched from the table, well watching Steve more than anything.

He hated the way Steve licked his lips as he watched her. The way Steve's eyes looked like they wanted to devour her, with no care that Eddie was sitting right there.

Eddie's last straw was when Y/N accidentally lost her grip on the plate, plunging into the sink and causing the water to splash all over her white shirt. The red lace bra easily shows itself. And easily catches both of the boy's eyes in the room.

"wow Y/N, wear that just for me?" Steve smirked. Y/N assumed it was a careless joke so she laughed and brushed it off. But Eddie took it as pure disrespect. This guy was disrespecting her, their relationship, and him all at once.

"HEY!" Eddie shouted, hitting the table as he stood up.

Y/N quickly looked over her shoulder at him. Her eyes told him not to do whatever he was going to do. Steve looked at him confused and that pissed Eddie off more.

"You don't talk to her like that! She didn't wear it for you and she never will." Eddie snapped, crossing his arms to seem more intimidating.

"Just a harmless joke, man," Steve said, holding his hands up to show he meant no harm.

"It's not harmless. You are making comments about her body. That's not a body you get to admire! It's mine!" Eddie pouted, losing his intimidation immediately when he stomped his foot.

Y/N let out a big sigh, knowing exactly what an Eddie stomp let to. He was seconds away from a tantrum.

"Baby, let's relax before you get upset." She said softly. Wiping the soap off of her hands before she walked over to him.

She kissed his pouty lips, keeping her voice low as she spoke against his lips, "Head to bed and I'll be right there and we'll talk."

Eddie huffed but accepted her order. Uncrossing his arms and shuffling out of the room.

She took a deep breath when she heard the bedroom door slam hard.

"I'm sorry about that." She apologized, walking back over to Steve.

"Sorry about his little hissy fit? He's like a man-child." Steve snickered

But Y/N didn't find anything funny.

"He was upset and he had a right to be. Your comment shouldn't have been made and especially not in front of my boyfriend. You disrespected him in his own house. And now? You disrespected me by talking about him like that. You can get the hell out of my house." She snapped. Stomping over to the front door and yanking it open.

"Look, it was a joke! I didn't mean to upset anyone" Steve tried to explain.

"Well, you did. We'll talk at the office but right now, please leave" she ordered. And just like Eddie would, Steve followed her order in seconds. Grabbing his jacket as he walked himself out the door.

Before she closed the door she called his name, "And Steve?" He turned around, "If you ever talk about him like that again, I won't hesitate to get your ass fired." Then she slammed the door.

~~~

"Baby?" Eddie turned his head as he heard a soft knock on the bedroom door.

"Open, Mommy," he said, turning his head back to face the wall when she walked in.

She crawled onto the bed, grabbing his small waist as she turned him on his back. His red puppy eyes stare at the ceiling.

"You want to talk about it?" She whispered, moving her hand to undo the bottom buttons of his shirt. Exposing his tummy as she began to draw small circles against the skin.

Eddie hummed at the comfortable feeling.

"I'm sorry I embarrassed you." He whispered, eyes still on the ceiling.

"you didn't, baby. You had every right to put him in his place." She reassured him.

"Why did you send me away then?" He asked, this time looking down at her.

"I wanted you to calm yourself down, that's all," She said, giving him a small smile as she finally was able to make eye contact.

"Not embarrassed of me?" He whispered, his hand moving down to land on hers. Now causing her hand to rest against his stomach.

"Never," she said, moving up to kiss his lips. He kissed her back instantly, loving how safe he felt underneath her touch.

She pulled away and stared at him for a few seconds. Sensing something in his head as he kept looking down at her bra.

"You want to cum on it, don't you?" She laughed. Eddie blushed immediately, she could feel the hand on hers get wet with sweat.

"a little" he squeaked out, hips wiggling when her free hand moved to unbutton his black jeans.

"after all, it is your bra" she teased.

Tags!

@bmunson86 @mxcheese @ladymunson @michaelfuckinglangdon @z0mbie-blah @biittersweet @mirrorsstuff @somethingwicked @micheledawn1975 @ago-godance @magnificantmermaid @tlclick73 @hargrovesswifee @cityofidek @manyfandomsfanvergent @silky-luxe @lokiofasgard616 @loving-and-dreaming @eddiemunsonsbitch69 @thegemaqua @ashlynnkennedy @strangerthingsstories5255 @harringt8ns @pleasinghellfire @whoscamila @stusdollface93

Bratty Eddie tags

@simping-over-boys-with-trauma @capricornrisingsstuff @somnialol @buginnettesstuff @thegemaqua @skyline4446

@bunnyweasley23 @leahhs-things

[hplonesomeart]

Heya, HP!

I’m asking this anonymously because I don’t want reassurance if you find out it’s me, but I’m wondering if you have any tips for drawing/animating characters. I’ve seen how you draw and animate and it’s made me feel amazed by your work, but also ashamed that I can’t draw as good as you (DO NOT FEEL GUILTY ABOUT IT, PLEASE, YOU CAN’T HANDLE IT AND IT’S NOT JUST YOU!)

I’ve been drawing for about 5 years now and have had no progress in my art. Every time I try something different, it ends up looking like shit. I guess I’m also asking this ask because I’ve been lacking self confidence for about half a month

I’m sorry if this is selfish, I’m not trying to make it about myself

But yeah…do you have any tips?

OH GEE UH—first off there’s no shame in using anonymous and you shouldn’t feel pressured to justify it! It’s an accessible option precisely for moments like this; it’s far more important to feel safe when asking vulnerable questions then to have additional unneeded stress. I do appreciate having some background information for your thought processes behind it tho, thank you for being willing to share your feelings and experiences. Art is definitely something that can bring on insecurity—I also have artists I often envy/admire the skills of lol. All part of being human. Your not selfish at all for it :)

For the art tips uhh….bear with me because I’m not too good at formulating constructive tips? This is all coming from someone who started drawing solely because of a colorful 2000’s cartoon pony show LMFAO. I learned how to draw quadrupeds before ever drawing humans, so the development of my skills isn’t as easy for me to track linearly. I’m still learning to this day that there’s things I need to practice on (cough cough backgrounds & correct muscle anatomy/realism)

My tips will be listed below under the ‘keep reading’ point (because I don’t wanna directly flood peoples dashes with massive amounts of text)!

1) FIRST ADVICE: CONSUMING ART CONTENT & REFERENCING OTHERS!! >:D

Honestly I think that’s the best place to start. With the content you consume. People who watch a lot of anime tend to gravitate to drawing exaggerated detailed eyes, angular chins, more human features (of course this is a generalization and doesn’t always apply to everyone. It’s just my personal observation is all). Meanwhile those who watch something more like Looney Tunes may adapt to using stretchy flexible shapes, unrealistic proportions, maybe even more anthropomorphic character designs.

Point being: we get influenced by the environment around us without even realizing it. Even when we’re not consciously aware, our minds absorb information and try to apply it in our own lives. My advice is to become AWARE of this. Be able to think critically about shows you enjoy and pinpoint the choices the artist uses to make it moment feel meaningful (sorry this is gonna start focusing mostly on animation tips & visual storytelling lol). I watch a lot of video essays breaking down camera movements, writing character arcs, learning how the lighting or colors change the mood. You could play around with that in your art too! Does the character emotion come from the eyes, the body posture, or the colors? Figure out where the emphasis should be and keep practicing at it :)

For example (oh boy I’m gonna out myself here) an artist I admire on YouTube is SAD-IST! I think she’s got a very solid understanding of how to invest the viewer/audience’s attention into a story. So I look at some of the techniques she uses:

The usage of comic panels to focus in on a singular object/expression/action. Something that I wanted to try doing with my own stuff :))

Or using a subtle motion blur for objects moving quickly in the background. If it doesn’t need to be the focus of the story then make it out of focus lol!

I think it’s mostly about finding an artistic language you vibe with and can draw inspiration from. Analyze what made the artist you admire so successful—what do you love about it so much in the first place? (which hey I guess you’re kinda already doing that right now, so your on the right track lol!). This applies not only to artists but musicians as well! There’s been plenty of times when a musician remixed a pre-existing song, parodied or outright sampled the melody of another, or aligned lyrics to match messages! My favorite musicians (Vylet Pony, AJR, and a plethora of Broadway musicals that have reoccurring motifs/themes) often follow those types of patterns. I think there’s too much of a taboo on social media about what you can and can’t do with art. I don’t think it’s wrong to share similarities with artists you admire. It only helps strengthen your understanding of them

2) UHHH DRAW FOR YOURSELF!! (I’m making this shit up as I go I have no idea what I’m saying lmfao)

When I started out drawing, it was purely for self indulgent reasons. I would spend my time at recess making up fanmade My Little Pony comics. SO. MANY. COMICS. Did it matter that anyone besides me couldn’t read the dialogue? No! Did it matter that the characters looked weird? No! Did it matter that the story wasn’t even planned ahead of time? No because I didn’t care! I was a kid who wasn’t caught up on comparing myself with others. I did it for me and me alone because I loved cartoons and I had made up stories. As long as you take the initiative to create then you’re making something special regardless of the quality. If you deny yourself the ability to draw because you’re waiting for your skills to get better then you’ll waste so much time that could’ve been used making what you love. You’ll never improve if you don’t accept failure as part of it. If that makes any sense…?

I hope that doesn’t come across rude. I understand you’ve been trying to be happy with your art and simply can’t. I’m not trying to say you shouldn’t be upset about it. It’s okay to be upset when it doesn’t look like how you wanted. I’m just saying that mental perception is a huge factor of how we view ourselves, our art, and others around us. Be cautious about what internal voices you listen to. Sometimes we just need to be reminded of the child inside who didn’t care about impressing others as much. Do it for you—and if not for you then make it for your younger self <3

Here is a video where I try to reinforce this point by using examples of my own life experiences (yes it’s very disorganized and chaotic):

………uh…..UH….yea I’m sorry those are the only two main tips I can think of from the top of my mind right now. I wish I had more to offer 😭

It’s probably glaringly obvious by now that I’m a self-taught artist. Although I have taken Art of Film & video production classes in high school (actually my favorite ever I recommend those if you like movies/storytelling) along with scriptwriting, 2D animation, and those typical traditional art classes…a lot of it still boils down to self-taught behavior. I think it could still be beneficial to sit in a class and have the information taught in the educational way, but for me usually the key learning is done outside of school. Especially those traditionally structured art classes ohhhh those did not process well with my brain. Helped me understand graphite shading and that’s pretty much it <<

Anyways sorry for taking up so much of your time with chunks of writing—although you probably already knew that was coming haha. I appreciate being someone that you look up to!! Thanks for your question and I hope a few parts of this rambling helped. Take care and I wish you best with your art. You’ll be okay :)

[nereidprinc3ss]

so um, you’ve probably have been asked this many times but how do you start writing fanfic without cringing at yourself? i already feel silly for reading it. i noticed you have gained recognition outside of tumblr which i believe to be an achievement but i can’t allow myself to go through that.

i work in the finance sector at a big american firm, i can’t have my coworkers knowing i’m writing fanfic. i already get teased for watching disney animated films (which it’s not that bad) how do you deal with this? ik you’re still at college and ofc, this doesn’t mean you’re stupid but i bet you know what i mean? do you have some advice on this?

⚠️me not shutting the fuck up and getting way too personal below the cut

honestly at first i DID cringe at myself. i cringed so much that after posting my first fic in like november i dont think i posted again til january because i was writing and would just get so humiliated despite being alone and no one knowing who i was or what i was doing LOL but honestly the way i got over that was just to do it more because i truly love writing and why would i let feeling “cringe” stop me from doing something i love and that makes me happy? that would be so heartbreaking, life is hard enough, we deserve to do things we love and are passionate about without judging ourselves so harshly

as for not letting other people know well yeah i just don’t tell my friends or anyone ik in real life that i write fanfic lol, they know i love to write and they know im obsessed with spencer reid but that’s as much as i’ve told them! i know it’s a thing that maybe most people would consider “weird” but as someone who has a crushing fear of intimacy this is kinda my outlet lmfao. and it made me feel really insecure and weird at first but then i realized like… i try to be kind and caring and thoughtful, i have a lot of good qualities and the fact that i write fanfic doesn’t actually detract from any of them. it also helped for me to accept the reason why i write fanfic which is (and we’re abt to get real personal) i’m deeply afraid of intimacy of any kind and always have been so writing fiction abt the stuff i’m too scared to do isn’t a bad thing. there are a lot of people who wouldn’t understand it but they don’t have the same experiences as me and i don’t need them to understand it because i know that they never could. like they don’t understand what it’s like to so terrified of being known by another person that you obsess over the hottest guy in your school district for six months bc you want the validation of him liking you back and you do everything in your power to make him like you and then when he actually does reciprocate you immediately start icing him out to the point where he says hi at a party and you ignore him to his face cause you’re so afraid of men😂😂😂😂😂 they don’t get those vibes!!!

anyway basically you just have to remember that you’re doing it for you and it actually doesn’t mean something is WRONG with you if you enjoy writing and the safety and control that fiction offers you. it just means you’re one of billions of people living an entirely unique experience, just like anyone else, and honestly i think it makes you interesting. having hobbies and passions is rlly sexy and cool, regardless of what they are, and you deserve to do stuff you like doing. if anyone else is giving you shit abt it it’s probably because they genuinely don’t understand what it’s like to have interests and that makes me feel bad for them lol

[pyrodolls]

hey i have a question about your ocs, bayani and victor. personally which do you like more or like writing about more? i am quite curious of your preference, out of the blue.

ooooo i have a lot to say. i have been WAITING for someone to ask this

so if you scroll down my acc you’d naturally assume i prefer writing about bayani cuz i have more posts about him, but i’d say i like them both equally. maybe victor slightly more.

the reason why i don’t write about victor often is because i feel like i don’t have a good grasp on what i want his character to be, and for the longest time i wasn’t sure how i wanted to introduce him properly.

he’s inspired by characters like patrick bateman from american psycho, and coriolanus snow from the hunger games. victor is the type of guy that is the epitome of what the average person wants in a partner. he’s tall, rich, educated, attractive, his parents appear to love him, he has many friends, everyone likes him. but he’s a sadistic asshole. an insecure, controlling, possessive asshole. he has no love in his heart for himself or the people around him. he’s intelligent, but manipulative. he’s the type of man to always get whatever he wants and nobody can stop him. i’ve been having trouble the past couple of months thinking about how i wanted to introduce these traits, because i think he’s far more complex than bayani.

don’t get me wrong tho, bayani is fun as hell. he’s the complete opposite of what the average person looks for in a partner. he’s short, he’s a college dropout, poor, he has a shitty job (prob mcdonald’s lmfao), shitty apartment, he has no friends and his parents have hated him ever since he was born.

that’s the main reason why he’s so attached to popstar! reader. he’s willing to do anything for their approval, because he’s terrified of being thrown away like dirt. his whole life nobody paid attention to him. popstar!reader does, though. even if it’s violent. he’d accept every kick, every punch. because he thinks it’s better than being ignored. he’s quite delusional and believes he’s doing an honorable service as popstar!reader’s punching bag. and if they were to show him affection instead, he’d be incredibly flustered because he isn’t used to it. he loves it, but he believes he doesn’t deserve their love, and attempts to repay popstar!reader in any way he can.

back to victor tho: i know i’m dropping lots of lore bombs right now and i’m starting to deviate from the question so i apologize BUT i just have a lot i’ve been wanting to say.

i think victor doesn’t truly love popstar!reader. it’s lust. it’s desire. but not love. victor’s a selfish man. growing up, he was the only child and heir for his family’s company. he was raised with money. he always got what he wanted. and he had the brains to make up for his spoiled nature. so when he didn’t get what he wanted, he’d always find a way to hurt someone else to get it.

i’m not quite sure why victor is the way he is. is it because his parents gave him more money than love, which drove him to hate them when he grew up? or is it because ever since he was a child, he was always glorified and trained to see everyone else as below him? we may never know.

what i do know is: victor likes popstar!reader because it’s a challenge for him. popstar!reader is one of the most desired people in the world. he likes having something nobody else can have. he likes stalking them and making sure they’re safe and happy. not exactly because he cares about their wellbeing, but because he’s quite delusional and believes he’s an amazing man for doing so. that's why he believes he's the only man for them. he’s twisted because he believes he is doing nothing wrong.

but hey, even i’m a sucker for an asshole-turned-romantic. so maybe someday victor will see the error in his ways and learn that he isn’t the center of the universe. maybe someday victor may truly fall in love with popstar!reader rather than teasing and toying with them as a possession of his. idk. we’ll see.

anyways uhhh sorry for yapping LMFAOOOO i like writing about both but i (slightly) prefer victor because he’s fun. and i feel like my bayani works are getting repetitive. oh well. if you read all the way thru i am so sorry. thanks for the question, anon! <3

[loquarocoeur]

Hey lovely! I’m back w another anon, at this point I’ll put an emoji so you know it’s the same person saying hi bc I’m not sending this on my blog name but ashshsjsh.

The asks and your responses on the spanking shit have me wanting to send this ask that I’ve been thinking about, but like. After the end of ‘pushing buttons’ I rlly enjoyed the bit where charles was almost insecure, and max responded the way he did so beautifully about how he loves charles the most bc he’s charles and what about it him he finds so loving and hot and how he was mentioning Charles’s pleasure too and that just. Really made me want to have a fic perhaps on the doms pleasure a bit. Not entirely but if you’d want to I’d love for you to get into charles head and thoughts a bit. It’s hard to explain what I mean because I’m being vague bc I’m embarrassed enough typing this as is lmfao but I hope you kinda get what I mean here? How you were talking about charles headspace in the other ask and everything I just got very Inchrested

I just love this verse and the way you write and maybe I die everytime I see another blog post of yours about some smutty shit! Maybe!

- 🦢 (I’ll make myself the swan emoji anon bc why the fuck not. Hi it’s me I sent the asks like max speaking Italian for maybe one line perfectly and made the suggestion about the ‘monza fic having the hotel tifosi chanting. Idk I just wanted to lyk it was me ahahshsjjs)

Okay hi, hello, I'm here with my thoughts now and absolutely YES, prepare for an essay:

Like idk, I've been meaning and trying to get into Charles' head a bit more since forever, but it is just quite hard nailing him down, he's just a very complex character nowadays with that duality between his 'dom persona' I guess and then absolute golden retriever, head over heels, bend over backwards, and jump when Max says jump sweetheart he is outside of that headspace

It's just there's just so many things from Charles' perspective to think of, you know, specifically talking about sex scenes now:

Like, okay, first of all, he's just a man, Max barely needs to take off his shirt. Like he's absolutely insatiable, he goes insane for a glimpse of Max's stomach, the only time he won't even try to start anything in the shower is if he got an orgasm five minutes ago, so obviously there's the aspect that he just thinks Max is fucking hot, just looking at Max does it for him, and also men are men, it feels good getting their dicks wet I guess

But then there's also obviously the thing that we don't talk about enough in fandom and that's that doms like being dominant just as much as subs like being submissive

And you know it's hard to nail it down and elucidate it, because we don't have enough examples for it, because (and this is also totally fine of course) fandom is just usually very focused on the perspective of more submissive people for probably many reasons which we won't get into rn, but the point is like you have to make this shit up as you go, there's not a script and an easy how-to like there is for writing submissive perspectives because we've all read thousands of those of course

Because like obviously Max technically has as much if not more control over the situation as Charles does with safewords and all, but Charles obviously LIKES being or feeling in control

There's kind of this underlying societal belief that we often get where it's just perceived as inherently bad when someone wants or likes to be in control or in a position of power, which is why I feel we hear the dom perspective waaay less than the sub one, because ironically, the doms are too shy to speak up I guess lol

But you know Charles obviously likes that he can tell Max what to do and he does it, he likes how Max, just as a person, is quite dominant in the way he behaves, he's not a follower, when someone says sit down Max asks why, and he's no different with Charles when they're just them and there's no dom/subness going on, but he likes how when they're in that space and Charles says sit down Max sits the fuck down

And then I think the thing I always emphasized most is how Charles just gets off on seeing Max feel good, like he gets off on making Max feel so good he loses all function, and that comes back to Charles having just as much of a praise kink as Max, but he doesn't need Max to tell him he's doing good, he needs to see it

And then it's just how do I fit all this in and consolidate it with the way that of course, Charles is far from quiet or reserved during sex, he won't shut up actually, but there's these times when, from Max's perspective, you have no idea what's going on in his head, because he has this talent for just turning his face blank

And don't think I as the author somehow know any more than you do when it comes to Max's perspective like guys idk either, I was just there

But yes, I do hope to elaborate on it a bit more in the future🥰❤️❤️❤️

[labyrinthe-exe]

laby_log 0.2

oh wow... has it already been like idk... two weeks? it's kind of insane to think about... originally i wanted to do it every week, but a lot of stuff has happened since my last log..

but i released the demo! wip! you can find it here!

anyway... now to actually get into my mental state and where i was at progress wise during the last two weeks

so! i left off in an optimistic spirit, while i was mentally in a downpour and feeling waves of hppelessness.... i also was positive of the future! i had to do some cuts in terms of cutting off legs but....

as soon as i finished that devlog, i ended up just... really really going through it mentally...

i was both tired, fatigued, and like all over the place even more. i had started to write but i was insecure about my story and the pacing and if i was even doing a good job. i was worried about if the story i was telling would even be interesting or if the designs were hot enough, attractive enough... i was wondering if i was doing justice to characterization, too?

that also was the fact i just felt like giving up completely LMFAO

i was powering through, and i wasn't progressing in ways that i want to... hell what can i show for it other than writing? that you can see in the game!

but anyway, i started working on the key art and this is where i spiraled again LOL wow... me and spiraling... is it professional to express all this? i dont know...

and this is where i was unraveling... you see i started out mapping stuff out ( i dont have the screenshots i dont think of the part before i fixed stuff but like its okay these are some i sent to my friends LOL ) but the third pic is where i hated it... i had to go to sleep cause i just wanted to cry

i felt like i was struggling with both trying to improve my art, stay consistent, but also develop an art style all at once in the same frame and that sort of progression... is hard? scary... terrifying... it made my heart totally break

but! i perservered!

and WHAM! i started getting somewhere with the help of amazing community of friends who i just spammed LMFAO like "pls i need it to look like clouds...." and also just in general to make sure i was on the right track with vibes...

i finally felt a little satisfied though it still didnt match the other cains i drew/other love interests but eh... honestly consistency is a hurdle i will have to learn how to get over eventually, i was looking at this game development process as not a fun experience but as a job and that was really fucking with my creative process

a lot.

AND I SWEAR I WAS COOKING THOUGH! once i was getting into a roll, but my progress still felt abysmal with all the things i wanted to achieve: good writing, good story, attractive characters..

i felt i was lagging behind my peers, i felt like i was making a fool of myself. who am i even trying to make games yanno? i'm just a sort of like... artist who struggles to even draw everyday. which doesn't mean im impassionate... i think i am passionate...

it's just a battle...

that and irl i have to take care of the household in terms of chores and the like, i only have so much mental bandwidth... it was hard to socialize some days cause i just felt like i was disappointment... would i even be able to finish in time?

well from the beginning of this log, it's clear i did finish something! aided w/ the power of friendship and eternal shounen determination LOL yes. call me naruto ( don't but funfact in elementary my friends called me ichigo kurosaki )

once again, i had to take an art break, here's my art from 2022 ( the subview ) versus 2025! i'm so happy with my progres even if the sketch i made was kinda shitty too LMFAO i do have plans for a project featuring this character, a little devil ( he'll be in a game with anathema... i'll take about anathema in another post one day, my precious baby )

either way, i found it easy to compare everyones progress to mine... like wow other people are able to be so organized and cool and i struggle with it... even checking off lists, it's hard for me? i felt all over the place, sinking into a pit that i created myself and that i was just showcasing the worst parts of me...

even though thats not true.

honestly i was incredibly worried people wouldn't like cain, the mc, he's like so pivotal to the story it'd be kind of hard to rework the entire story because cain is like... pivotal, i'd just have to write a completely different story...

but the show must go on, i kept making things.

honestly, in real life was a strong part of why i felt kinda crappy. even online, being busy so much and not socializing w/ key people that i usually socialize with was such a damper on my mood. i missed my friends. i wonder if they felt uncared for while i was busy ( which isn't true, but my brain is weird ) WOW AM I OVERSHARING? idk... i feel that its important to showcase that my design process includes being all over the place...

i didn't work every day. i tried to, but i didn't.

while my friends were trucking along on gui, i was frozen in a sense of wondering if i should even continue development or quit while i'm ahead and ghost everyone for being a disappointment.

the deadine was nearing and i still hadn't even written the kiss. the gui wasn't done either which didn't worry me as much as being worried that i would disappoint everyone i told "i'm making a game!" what would i look like then... if i didnt make it? a gameless loser?

i know right. what the heck?

it makes no sense.

i ended up writing the kiss yesterday actually, i was experiencing writer's block cause i was so insecure about my story.

but woo boi. the story got put out the gui got done and my stress... didnt dissipate. either way, i think the last two weeks of the jam was a tough time? i did learn a lot. like what i needed to prioritize, how to better prioritize for my workflow.

i have to go like gui - sprites - writing - editing - backgrounds - writing again... i think? it feels a little weird but i think that'll work for me? i can still fix that though.

ANOTHER THING! i couldnt actually sleep last night. i was nervous how my story would be recieved LMFO isn't that normal i think...

but i released the game!

and there was typos.. which to be fair, i'm not good at cross-editing.. i was trying to go line by line after a friend proofread the first part for me and then i... kept missing stuff- don't be like me, just copy paste all the edits and reformat it. or just write in renpy speak in the first time...

but overall i think i learned a lot from swak.

am i still going to be ambitious?

hell the fuck yes.

but will i know how to better work around my high and low mental peaks? also yes. i think i need to remind myself every so often why i'm doing this... well i love writing, i love art, i love telling stories... i like to share my perspective on things, my characters perspectives, and just ships too in general I LOVE SHIPS! SO MUCH YOU DONT EVEN KNOW

but yeah...

does any of this make sense? i don't know... maybe i overshared, maybe i didn't. but the demo is done. it's still a giant wip, but i feel better about the future of it. the extended demo is coming and i will keep on trucking on. cause that's all i can do.

anwho... laby logging out <3