#like you dont need to always pick a side sometimes you can just shut up or ask questions and then go

[andrrrgynous]

hey what was the controversy involving amyl and the sniffers? i like to think that i have a half-decent knowledge of what's happening sometimes in the australian music scene but i hadn't heard of it lmao

ok so i'll link a few articles that explain it a bit more thoroughly but basically they were on the lineup for a festival sponsored by the israeli ambassy and once some artists discovered this they called for a boycott bc obviously a lot of bands don't wanna play a festival sponsored by a colonizer government with a lot of blood on their hands. all these bands pulled out... except the headliner amyl and it didn't take long for people to accuse them of being zionists and to this day ppl still aren't sure if the band ''really didn't know'' like they said or don't care and are posers... but heres some links with more details

https://aijac.org.au/australia-israel-review/noted-and-quoted-january-2023/

and tbh i didn't forgive them until not that long ago bc i rlly thought they should've known better but forgiving is not forgetting for now it is strike 1 for me, if they pull something ignorant again they're over for me, but with situations like this i think people should stay critical and not just form an opinion without a discussion

[vendetta-ari]

hiii could I request a vox x f! reader with fluff, mutual pining, and smut? tysm <333

OFC YOU CAN I LOVE MUTUAL PINING 😭

I didn't have a lot to go off of so I kept it simple, I hope you enjoy my dear!!

WARNINGS: SMUT, NSFW (Minors please go away) PRAISE, [DUB-CON???] FINGERING, MAYBE MORE IDK MAN?? word count = 1,000

A blush spread across your face as vox put his shoulder around you, he always did shit like this but usually he was just joking or teasing you around, but something about this time felt different. maybe it was all the alcohol you two had drank but something about this small touch just made you crave Vox. you always were into vox ever since you laid your pretty little eyes on him.

Vox chuckled while sipping some whiskey, while turning to talk to Valentino. Of course he was talking to Val, they had some on and off relationship- and while you didn't really ever have that big of an issue with Valentino, you were jealous. So, so Incredibly jealous. Sometimes you'd hear them having sex and your anger built up against Val. God even hearing his voice just pissed you off. your nails dug into the couch you were sitting on out of anger as your eye twitched. Maybe it was the alcohol talking but you just couldn't keep your mouth shut, could you? 

Vox seemed to take notice of your growing anger and spoke up about it “Dollface,  you okay? the fuck is up with you?” He spoke in a concerned tone, despite his words.

You shrugged him off and just mumbled “I'm fine. get off my case! fucking christ Vox why dont you go fuck Val while your at it?”  you spoke in such a sharp and stern tone, different from how you usually presented yourself. You stormed out of the club and went into the apartment you stayed at. Vox and you were the only ones who had keys to said apartment, I guess he was just the only person you really trusted. ironic isn't it? The man whose whole motto is to “trust us” while deceiving people is the only guy you trust in hell. It was fucking pathetic and you knew that very well, but some part of you just- needed him. Like some drug he was impossible to live without.

as you delved into your sorrows of loving such a pathetic man, a knock was at the door which snapped you back to reality. It was quickly followed by the jingling of keys and vox shouting from the outside “Doll, I'm coming in to check on you, it's not like you to do that. I know something's up” Vox opened up the door as his view drifted to you, sitting on the floor looking all sad and pathetic, the strap of your dress falling down to the side as you looked up at him with a pissed off face. 

“So, whatd I do this time?” You almost choked on air, he really didn't know what he did? god this dumb fucking man, If you didn't love him your sure youd kill him instead. “What'd you do? you fucking treat me like some side peice! you act like you're into me and love me but then you go and fuck that stupid moth man!”

Vox smiled for a bit, an evil smirk from what you could tell. He picked you up off your feet and dragged you to your bed. “So you're jealous huh baby? well fuck if you wanted me to fuck you this bad.. you could've just asked~”

You felt your heart race, you felt your heart race so fast you couldve sworn it fucking stopped, your face turned red as you muttered out a response “p-please do..”

and that was all Vox needed, that was all Vox ever needed to hear. That you want him. and you need him. He always longed for you- he just tried to push away his feelings.  But now? Now he can show you how he really felt.

He crawled in between your legs, while grabbing your chin and kissing you. the kiss felt needy, and desperate,  like this had been needing to happen since the start. he unzipped your dress as he ran his hands up and down your figure, mumbling a small “Fuck..” He ripped off your dress in seconds, as he pulled down your panties his long blue claws slid into you pumping in and out of you at an agonizing pace.

“mmph- please vox go faster i-i cant take it anymore-”

You immediately regretted saying that because vox's fingers didn't only speed up, but he added another overstimulating you. “That good enough for ya doll? hah?~”

He took his fingers out of you, making you buck your hips towards him, trying to chase the pleasure you were once given.

Vox chuckled at the sight beneath him. “Relax my dear, I'll make sure I'm the only one that is gonna be able to make you feel this good m'kay?” he unbuckled his belt, the metal hitting the floor before you heard the zip of his pants. “Be a good girl and take this cock for me.” He shoved his dick into you, giving you a few seconds to adjust before moving at a fast pace, breathing heavily.

Trying to get a accustomed to the brutal pace he set you bit your lip, you bit your lip so hard you could've fucking sworn you were bleeding. both of you were so indulgent in the pleasure neither of you could barely speak, all that came out of your mouths were moans and sighs of relief, like this had been fate. After what felt like yours of that fast pace and your tongues intertwining, you both came together. you shivered at the pleasure and Vox fell on top of you shaking and trying to catch his breath without lagging or glitching out. he wrapped his arms around you with a whine, repeatedly saying “Thank you, thank you so much my dear..i-i love you”

“Mmph.. I love you too Vox..”

falling asleep in eachothers arms, before waking up the next morning with a hangover, so vox called off work and you two stayed in bed, your legs wrapped around him and mumbling lots of “I love you's”

HOPE YOU ENJOYED LOL, I BLACKED OUT DURING THIS ISTFG IDK WHAT HAPPENED (sorry for the late post)

-xoxo Ari

[pav-ia]

lol imagine being the nurse that handles pavia after he got injured during a suspicious fight.

cw :: gn reader , pavia is annoying

when he wakes up, his first thought is “where the hell am i?” a fucking hospital? he doesnt need a hospital. hes fine, hes a grown ass man and he misses his wolves dogs.

but as soon as he tries to move, he groans at the sharp pain in his side. looks down to see a gunshot wound on his side and frowns. that wasnt there before.

hes pouting angrily as he sits in bed all day, his piercings had been taken off and were set aside just out of arms reach and he had a heart monitor attached to him which made him cringe a little. he wasnt even close to death. what was the point in that??

when you step in to check up on him though..

“let me out.” he demanded as you walked in. you blinked in surprise that he was already awake.

“..no?”

“let me out.” he repeated.

“no.”

you expected more of a fight from the man who had his arms crossed, but he just pursed his lips and looked you up and down.

he didnt say anything else until you came back later in the day, carrying a tray of shitty hospital food. he looked grossed out from the runny mashed potatoes and the suspicious soup and the cold bread roll.

“dont you have anything else?” he demanded sassily. if he couldnt move then he may as well make the most out of his little stay.

“nope~ you get what you get.” you said in an equally sassy tone as she were currently sweeping the floor.

he cocked a brow at your tone, before he smirked. cute.

whenever you came in from that day on, hed have something new to complain about. “do you have socks?” “can i have a snack?” “my legs are sore.” “im bored.” and youd always meet his demands. it was your job, but he called for you a lot. sometimes he just wanted to talk to you, he would tell you about the stuff he saw from the tall window. eventually, he asked you to tell him about your day. having nothing better to do, you did.

conversations with him were surprisingly fluid. he had his own thoughts to add and he always brought up something interesting when it was his turn to talk. you caught yourself laughing at his poorly timed jokes, and he was occasionally insensitive but in a comedic way. although you would always hold back because it was mighty unprofessional to get too friendly with a patient.

you were pleased that he was healing. he got better but the better he got, the more complaints hed have. maybe he realized that he was gonna be able to leave soon so he always talked about how the lights were too bright- oh no, he might have twisted his ankle— hes struggling to breathe but only his favorite nurse is allowed to give him cpr ! shuts up immediately when youre about to call in your male coworker to administer cpr on him.

when he leaves, hes pouty and moody. he snaps at the other nurses, insisting that hes fine on his own. he doesnt need their help, hes a grown ass man.

your job is pretty boring for the next two days. two.

because on the third day, a man comes in with a gunshot wound in the leg.

that man is him, in case you were wondering.

hed grin, his cologne easy to smell when you first caught a glimpse of him being dragged away to the emergency room.

when the bullet was removed and he was stitched up, you were in charge of putting the man into a gown. they had cut his clothes off to get to the bullet, and as you picked up his shirt, your hands caught on a measly rose stuffed into the front pocket. his shirt smelled like his cologne too, and your nose wrinkled as you didnt even need to be close to smell it.

“miss me?” hed ask with a cheeky grin when he awoke and you were dusting the room.

sowwie for disappearing heres your monthly food

[kairiscorner]

Can I request miguel with an insecure reader? :( like they wonder how he even fell for them or what they see in them... and maybe doesn't want kids because they're scared that they look like them and hate themselves as well

Sorry if it's too much and it's OK if you dont do it, love your blog ❤️🫂

AAAAAAAA I LOVE THIS !! no bc i get those feelings sometimes too :'(( i hope this provides you all the comfort you might be needing, and remember, you're all perfect just the way you all are 💓

❝i love you as you are.❞ — miguel o'hara x insecure!reader

there are times when you'd often go quiet randomly, no matter if the moment was lively and fast-paced–or even happy–earlier, you'd go silent all of a sudden and just kind of recluse away on your own without saying a word. you couldn't help it, the inner turmoils and nervous overthinking would always plague your mind and cause you to want some peace and quiet–even if you could never catch a break nor a moment of silence with those raging thoughts in your mind that refused to shut up and quit hurling insults at you that... you believed for a time to be true. you gripped at the blankets and tried blinking away the tears that formed in your eyes as you mumbled out a breath of, "stop it" at your mind; hoping against all hope that through your resistance, your brain would stop filling your head with distorted images of you that you couldn't even recognize. you soon let the tears fall as your mind kept asking you just why miguel was even with you; he's expressed before how much he yearned for kids of his own indirectly, hinting at some other dreams he wanted to live out that you couldn't provide for him.

"...i don't want to have kids, they... oh, they'd... they'd look so..." you whimpered out as you sobbed, choking on your words as you shook out the thoughts of your kids in your mind. you personally couldn't share the same vision as miguel, you didn't want kids—you wanted to live you life to the fullest, and you didn't feel that having kids was the end all be all of your existence, you just wanted to be you and live your life. and yet, you felt so inadequate at not even being able to share the same enthusiasm as miguel for wanting kids. you wept and cried for a few minutes, until a knock at the door was heard, and you sniffled back your sobs. "mi vida, are you in there? amor... can we... talk? i-i'm... i'm worried about you." miguel said with a soft, gentle voice that made you tear up again. how could you ever tell him when he's wanted children of his own for the longest time? wouldn't you seem selfish to him, for not being able to give him just this one thing when he's given you his everything? this made you think back as to why he picked you out of everyone else—there were many other people who wanted miguel, and... many of them were vocal about their desires to be parents–the one thing you were frightened of and had no interest in being.

they were all the same as miguel, eager to have their own families and didn't care about what others thought of them, they moved to the beat of their own drums and didn't stop for anybody, unlike you, who was so self-conscious and anxious about everything, especially yourself. you didn't respond, making miguel open the door out of concern and peek his head in through the crack of the door. miguel walked over to the side of the bed and sat next to you lying down, looking over at you with a saddened gaze, as if he were a lost puppy–sad and alone. "cariño, talk to me... please? if you don't wanna talk, though, that's okay. just, please... don't be scared of me, don't be scared of what you think i'll say or do, i love you, mi vida–i would never hurt you or try to hurt you, i could never."

his words of reassurance were so powerful, so genuine that you felt every word vibrate in your bones and sink deep within you, reaching your heart and piercing it like a dagger. you couldn't keep your feelings in anymore and rolled yourself over to his side, where he saw your eyes wide and swollen–sobbing and wet, your eyebrows crinkling upwards as your lower lip quivered. you apologized to miguel for the mess you were becoming, but miguel ran his hand through your hair and shushed you, saying it was okay, you're okay, you have no fault in anything. "mig, i... i can't make your dream come true." you choked out in a sob. "what could you possibly mean, mi amor? of course you can, you already have..." "no, i can't... i-i don't... i don't..." you stuttered, unsure of how to fully tell him in a way that'll lessen the blow, but you had no other way–you had to tell him, right now. with one decisive breath, you decided to just be honest with him, right here, right now.

"...i don't want kids, miguel..." you murmured out in a whisper, sobbing and gripping at the sheets as your tears stained them. you shook your head and sniffled back your tears, yet nothing stopped the tears from flowing as you kept repeating your truth: you don't want children of your own, and you don't want them to even resemble you. you found it a curse your children would inherit if they looked anything like you, because in your mind, you looked less than desirable; you believed miguel was simply holding out for you and secretly losing feelings behind all his caring smiles and sweet kisses. you apologized to miguel over and over, but miguel reassured you it was... okay. he rubbed your arm gently and shushed you.

"cariño... i love you either way. you don't need to be a parent for me to keep wanting you, i just want you to be you." "and why do you want to be with me?" "because i love you, and that's final. i love you, mi vida... you don't need to bear my children or be a parent, i love you for you, and that'll never change. you already made all my dreams come true by loving me back, and i'll do everything in my power to keep that smile on your beautiful, lovely face. you're perfect, amor, eres perfecta como eres." he whispered to you as he wrapped his arms around you and held you closely and tightly; he kissed the top of your head and rubbed up and down your arms all comfortingly. you cried into his chest and clung on to the front of his shirt while he shushed you and kissed your tears away. though it'll take a long time of undoing the way you saw yourself, the way you couldn't accept many things about you, it comforted you somehow that miguel loved you—for your perfections and flaws, for your strengths and weaknesses, for your comfort and discomfort. he loved you with a love that transcended love, and you didn't feel anything apart from a weight being lifted off your shoulders, bit by bit.

he loved you, and that was all he knew.

tags !! @miguelswifey04 @hearts4gabri @hisachuu @wreakingmarveloushavok @fictarian @yuridopted0 @simsrandomstuff @luvstarrstruck @popeheywardssecretgf @meeom @arachnoia @melovetitties @fable-library @ophanimgold @smokeywhalee @capnshtfce

[harrysrealgf]

TO BE SO LONELY

minipulative!harry x innocent!reader

summary: Harry has changed since you guys have started dating, but you love him too much to let go. Ever since hes changed, you want the side of him back when you guys first met.

Prince!Harry Era

warnings: slightly toxic relationships

—————————🌷🌷🌷—————————

You love Harry. With everything in you. You thought nobody else was good for you. You believed that. Your friends all told you Harry was toxic and hes changing, but in your ears all you heard was that they were jealous.

“M’leaving.” Harry said walking straight past you.

“Wait where are you going?” You looked up from your phone.

“Out.” He said putting his shoes on.

“Oh. Okay, stay safe honey.” You really couldn’t care where he went or what he did, because you trusted him.

“Can i have a good bye kiss?” You ask sweetly. He sighs and walks over to you, giving you a peck on the lips.

“I gotta go.” He said blankly.

“Ok. Love yo-“ The door shut.

Rude.

—————————🌷🌷🌷—————————

“Y/n he’s not good for you. I don’t know why your even going on this date tonight! Go out with us instead!” Your friend, Sophia, insisted.

You were on FaceTime with Sophia and your phone was on your bed while you looked for a pretty dress to go out with H in.

“You sound jealous. And i cant go out with you guys. Harry wouldn’t like it.” You said looking at the perfect dress.

“Ooh. What do you think about this one?” You picked up your phone and showed her.

“It’s beautiful Y/n. You look beautiful in everything you wear. Now please listen to me, he’s not good for you, he’s toxic, he doesn’t listen to you-“ She was interrupted by Harry walking in.

“Y/n hang up the phone.” He insisted.

“I-“ I start to say.

“Now, Y/n.” You look down at your phone and tell her bye and hang up.

“I don’t want y’to be friends with her anymore.” He said sternly.

“B-but why? Sophia’s been my friend for as long as i can remember.”

“Because shes trying to ruin our perfect relationship honey. Y’don’t want to break up do you?” He sat you down on your bed and sat down beside you.

“Well, no. But..”

“No buts sweetie. I love you and y’love me,right?” You nodded “Then we only need each other. So do me a favor hon and block her, f’me?” You would do anything for him if he used this tone with you and he knew it.

“Okay.” He smiled and kissed your forehead. “Now go put on y’dress. We’re leaving soon.”

You nodded and smiled as he walked out.

y/n: we cant b friends anymore. sorryyyyy!!!

Sophia: R u srs y/n.

y/n: yaaaaa.

Sophia: Is it because of your psychotic boyfriend?

y/n: hes not psychotic. ur just a bitch who doesnt know what love is!! so bye bye🥰

Sophia: Dont come crawling back when he hurts you.

—————————🌷🌷🌷—————————

The next day was the worst. Definitely not the worst day ever, but it sucked. You couldn’t stop crying and you didn’t know why. You couldn’t tell if it was from all the alcohol last night, Sophia, the fact your birthday was in a week, or the fact you missed the man you met, and its not Harry now. You’d been crying ever since you woke up, just scrolling on instagram. Harry laid beside you hungover like a mf.

You finally turned his way and he opened his eyes to look at you. Sometimes he would treat you like a princess and other times… well…

But right now he was going to treat you like a princess.

“Baby whats wrong?” He said as you put your phone down.

“Nothing, i’m fine.” You smiled. You were good at hiding your emotions. Dangerously good. But Harry knew when something was wrong.

“No. Tell me.”

“H, its really nothing. I just saw a sad video.”

“Baby… Y’know I don’t like when you lie t’me.” He sat up, and so did you.

You sighed, “I just miss who you were when we first met.” Harry was incredibly sweet when he was hungover or drunk or even sleepy, so you wanted to talk about this now.

It took him a little bit. “What do you mean?”

“You just used to care more.” You say softly.

“Baby i’ve always cared about you.” He also said softly.

“I know that, but… You used to check on me, and that never happens anymore, you used to ask me how my day was, want to show me off to all your friends, you actually seemed like you wanted to be with me.” You stopped talking for a second to think.

“Its just not the same as it used to be.”

“Oh honey.” He looked you up and down. “Y’know i love you right? Y’the sweetest most perfect girl i’ve ever met. I might treat you like shit sometimes but i don’t mean it.”

“So your aware, but you keep doing it.” You cried silently. “You keep hurting me, H.”

“Look honey, some things have been going on at the studio and me n’the boys tracks aren’t going through and its a lot right now.” He tucked your hair behind your ear.

“Right now you’re incredibly sweet, but if i were to have this conversation with you yesterday, you probably would’ve told me to get over myself and that im being dramatic.” You cried more, you weren’t ugly crying yet, but the tears were still coming out.

“N-no… I wouldn’t have. Thats not me, I know i act differently when i get farther into the relationship, i’ve heard it from all of m’ex’s, but m’not like that anymore! You don’t really think m’like that still, do you?” He sighed.

He knew what your answer was. You couldn’t even talk at this point. You were trying to take deep breaths, but every breath resorted to another sob.

“I used to think i was just doing something wrong. Now i know your just mean.”

“No baby. M’not! Please honey m’the only one f’you. Please don’t do what i think y’gonna do.” He was crying now. He seriously doesn’t mean to do it, its like programed into his DNA or something.

“Y’so beautiful and y’the only girl ill ever want. If you break up with me i wont be able to get over you. M’so in love with y’bunny. Im sorry ive hurt you.”

“Im breaking up with you H. I wont let myself be treated like this anymore. Its not good for me. I love you so much but i just cant do it anymore.” He held onto your hand

“Please baby. I know m’arrogant and a bitch, but please ill change for you. I promise.”

“Don’t call me baby.” You said holding in tears.

“No honey i promise. I’ll change for you. I cant live without you. Oh god. I might throw up.” He was so overwhelmed and upset and hungover he was just about to throw up.

“Okay fine Harry. But im not kidding im not gonna do this anymore if your not gonna change.” You looked at him.

“Do you think its easy being of the jealous kind?”

“No i know its not. But i can help you change. Even if we do break up in the future i don’t want your potential future girlfriend to go through the same thing as me because it hurts more than you know H.” You wiped your dried tears up.

“Well first, were not breaking up, and second, m’so sorry f’making y’cry bunny. I didn’t mean to do any of this to you. I might’ve done it to some of m’exes but i didn’t ever love ‘em half as much as i love you. Y’so incredibly perfect for me.” He kissed you

“I love y’so so much.” He hugged you tightly.

“I love you more.” She smiled. She just wanted her Harry back. “But hey, to start off your changing, I kinda miss Sophia. Can I unblock her?”

[crestoflames]

ugh

every time I have a debate with someone about something where we’re on opposite sides and disagreeing, I just feel like a huge asshole. even if there’s nothing malicious happening, just two people discussing something passionately on opposite sides. like I’ve learned over the years that you can never stop people from having disagreements because it’s just human nature, but i still hate myself for it. I always wanna apologize too even if I don’t think I did anything inherently wrong

i feel the need to just make myself shut up and step away but it’s hard sometimes. i definitely am better about it than I was when I was younger, but i feel like i still should be much more skilled at just disengaging and picking my battles at my age.

i just wish i could stop feeling so strongly about some of my opinions that are relatively inconsequential in the grand scheme of things and just not join in if I know I’m gonna be disagreeing with someone. i don’t wanna be seen as an irritable bitch, but I feel like that’s what everyone thinks about me. i’m still just bad about not fully realizing when I’m already in an irritated mood (usually from stress or hunger) and not engaging until I’ve dealt with the cause of that.

it’s like, when I’m focusing on handling certain other things in my life and succeeding, then my social skills atrophy and I become less vigilant and more relaxed and don’t spend time thinking through my every response.

idk what I’m saying at this point. i just need to gain more irl friends and that will prevent this. also i dont think it’s due to being autistic and having ADHD, because most of the people i know online also have both of those including the people I end up disagreeing with. its just a me problem

[sadability]

hello!! i was scrolling thru the obey me tag & I saw that ur avail w matchups rn so i'd like to have an obey me match up! ^^

i checked ur profile & i dont think u specified on what info we should write of ourselves so pls don't mind if my format is gonna b rly messy ;_; (lmk tho if u did put some specific template or format on what we should write in ur match ups!)

I'm from asia, height is 164 cm/5'4 ft, im still a student but i do side hustles sometimes, for my age i prefer if u don't rlly count it in the match up since yk the characters in om are like all ancient lmfao so age will definitely already have a big gap but just in case u need it im turning 18 this dec:)

so anw my mbti is IDK im honestly confused but I think mbti/cognitive functions are interesting. im a sagittarius ♐. i like to think that im an ambivert, but at first i may definitely come off as shy reserved to others, but friendly to to others tbh it depends if I find them approachable/scary or not. my hobbies are reading, writing, sing & dance (but I suck at it lmfao). lately I'm also into podcasts,also recently I like to take night walks in my neighborhood:)

personality wise. . . i like to think myself as an open minded person:]. a friend of mine refers to me as a golden retriever and in my circle of friends im known to be the joker goofy one, but some also refer to me as a 'listener' or 'therapist. w my friends im sarcastic and dramatic ironically lmfao. anyways,, out of my main friend group and just to other people/casual friends, acquaintances or schoolmates, they refer to me as nice, friendly, chill. OHH and I think im expressive bc people say my face tends to express a lot of emotion even tho I don't rly intend to :’). my flawss? I've been said that I tend to yap sometimes lmfao. i also think I can be absent minded especially when I'm under pressure :’) I don't take pressure well huhu. so that means I'm not rly adaptable either. also i can be indecisive. also another info im a homebody but like it's not rly obvious at first bc sometimes I force myself to go out bc a lot of my friends in my friend group r outgoing & I don't wanna make them disappointed or smth (sometimes I make up an excuse tho so I don't go out lmfao). oh and I'm a night owl and prolly have undiagnosed insomnia /lh

anw I think I explained a lot (tbh too much actually) of my personality ngl so I'm gonna try my best to make my lists of interests short: I'm interested in biology, zoology, and history. I hate physics w all my heart. I like coffee, but tea is ok too. I like video game lore but I'm usually too lazy to play the game itself and I usually play fast paced games and valorant. current fave book is: romancing mr bridgerton from the bridgerton series. current fave show is: romance killer. my music taste is all over the place so I don't rly have a fave music genre.

anw that's all, have a good day!! thank u so much for reading & I'm sorry if it's too long. it's ok if u don't wanna answer this match up yet, take ur time!! once again thank u v much u don't need to answer this!

WHAT IS BRIDGERTON EVRYONE KEEPS TALKIN ABOUT IT RAHHH

Anyway!! I match you with...Satan!! :D

I think you two would be absolutely adorable together!! Satan would be very protective of you and always try to make sure you're comfortable, especially when meeting the demons for the first time. He would listen to your rambles and shut anyone that tries to speak over you up. Would let you roam his library and pick out any books you want, occasionally reading you to sleep :D Will hand you giant ass history books, biology books and zoology books. Will teach you about demon world animals too! He'd also love staying home with you and cuddling, just relaxing with each other ESPECIALLY when his brothers are out for the day

[pesterloglog]

Meenah Peixes, Meulin Leijon

Act 6, page 5308

MEENAH: what

MEULIN: (=^･ω･^) < OH!!!!!!!!! I MEANT TO ASK...

MEULIN: ヽ(=^･ω･^=)丿 < HAVE YOU MET THE HUMANS YET?

MEENAH: yeah

MEULIN: (=^-ω-^=) < OMG AREN'T THE JUST SO PERF???

MEENAH: nah

MEENAH: dont see what the big deal with em is

MEULIN: (^・x・^) < M33NAH, NO.

MEULIN: (^-人-^) < THEY ARE ALL SO PERFECTLY ADORABLE.

MEULIN: (^・ω・^ ) < EACH IS LITTERALLY MORE PRECIOUS AND PURRFECT THAN THE LAST.

MEENAH: if only you could hear how bonkers you sound

MEULIN: ~(=^‥^)/ < M33NAH. M33NAH. NO.

#M33NAH.

MEULIN: (^._.^)ﾉ < YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND.

MEULIN: ヾ(=ﾟ･ﾟ=)ﾉ < THEY ARE MY BABIES.

MEENAH: wtfs a babie

MEULIN: (=^･^=) < THEY ARE MY PERFECT PRECIOUS GAY LITTLE BABIES!!!!!!!!!

MEENAH: uh

MEENAH: whats gay

MEULIN: (=^ω^=) < IT'S A THING THAT HUMAN BABIES ARE SOMETIMES I THINK!

MEENAH: cant even deal w this meu

#failing to can #when it comes to dealin w it

MEULIN: (^･o･^) < OH AND DO YOU EVEN HAVE THE SLIGHTEST IDEA WHAT THE SHIPPING IMPLICATPUNS ARE???

MEULIN: ヽ(=^･ω･^=)丿 < BY ADDING THE HUMANS INTO THE PICTURE, BOTH PRE-SCRATCH AND SCRATCH-POST, IT HAS INCREASED THE PAIRING PAWSIBILITIES EXPOUNCENENTIALLY!

MEULIN: (^-人-^) < IT'S REALLY B33N OVERWHELMING, I CAN'T EVEN...

MEULIN: (^・x・^) < I JUST

#NO

MEULIN: (=ﾟ･ﾟ=) < THAT'S IT.

#I CAN'T

MEULIN: (=ＴェＴ=) < I'M SO DONE.

MEULIN:

MEULIN:

MEULIN:

MEENAH: hate to change the subject

#not really

MEENAH: but i kinda side stepped past kurloz back there whilst granting him a wide berth

#didnt wanna get tangled up in his hair

MEENAH: he obviously wont say a thing to me which is probs for tha best

MEENAH: but since he actually talks to you maybe you can answer stuff

MEULIN: (=^ω^=) < LIKE WHAT!

#HAIR POOFING TIPS?

MEENAH: like do you know if hes god tier

MEENAH: im building this army and its going horribubbly so far and im sure it would be unimaginably horrendous havin him along but i needs all the muscle i can get know what im sayin

MEULIN: (=^‥^) < I ACTUALLY DON'T KNOW!

MEULIN: (=^･ω･^=) < YES WE ARE PRETTY CLOSE, BUT YOU KNOW HOW HE IS. HE'S STILL VERY SNEAKRETIVE AND STILL LOVES MAKING RIDDLES OUT OF EVERYTHING.

MEULIN: (=^･ω･^=) < HE'S B33N VERY EXCITED LATELY. HE F33LS THAT SO MANY OF HIS SPOOKY RELIGION'S PROPHECIES ARE ON THE VERGE OF COMING TRUE, AND THE STARS ARE COMING INTO FELINEMENT.

MEULIN: (=^･ω･^=) < REMEMBER HOW HE USED TO GO ON AND ON ABOUT THE MESSIAHS, ANGELS OF DOUBLE DEATH, AND ALL THAT WACKY STUFF?

MEENAH: yeah we always had way waaay too many religious nutjobs in our party

MEENAH: so i always tuna'd him trout

#moar slammin puns #or should i say... #salmon

MEENAH: back when he could talk at least

MEENAH: then he did us all the psycho favor of sewing his mouth shut so it was win win

#angels of double win more like

MEULIN: (^‥^) < HEH. I SUPPOSE.

MEENAH: please dont take this for interest in shippin talk

MEENAH: but you and he arent a red item anymore right

MEULIN: (=^ω^=) < OH NO NO NO THAT WAS A LONG TIME AGO.

MEULIN: (=^ω^=) < WE'RE JUST REALLY GOOD FRIENDS NOW. WE HANG OUT AND JOKE AROUND ALL THE TIME. HE EVEN HELPS ME WITH MY GRIDS!

MEULIN: ~(=^‥^)ノ < GENERALLY I STICK TO THE RED MATCHUPS WHILE HE ADVISES ON BLACK. HE'S 33RILY TALENTED AT PICKING BLACKROM PAIRS! PROBABLY EVEN BETTER THAN ME...

MEENAH: dag what a boring fact

MEENAH: but its cool youre good fronds still

MEENAH: i thought i picked up heavy planktonic vibes from you

MEENAH: now why dontcha run along and talk to him

MEENAH: make use a your mutually compatible disabilities for communicatin and whatnot

#unabilitied mofos errywhere

MEENAH:

[ocean-anchored]

Dear future self... November 12, 2022

I was going to write, but my brain wont stop running. I didn’t want to write because I feel like I’m always complaining about him. & yes maybe I haven’t written more about the good times with him but idk man, I feel like it’s more work than it is enjoyable these days. The fact that I had a call with Dillon tonight & he even said that he’s heard me complain a few too many times about him & that I shouldn’t be worried or having these types of issues so early on for a brief moment made me feel sane. Most of the time I feel crazy. Like maybe I have these insanely stupid high expectations of communicating, & sure, Dillon doesn’t know both sides of the story or even all the details but for him to even say that we shouldn’t be having these communication issues so early on & that it shouldn’t feel this hard to try to make plans makes me feel like maybe I’m not totally insane, I know most times I am but still. Like I literally only just shared one part about how I feel I’m always bending over backwards re-arranging my schedule so I can see him and I don’t feel like I get the same back and times he gets mad at me, like this weekend, that I have plans & he couldn’t just expect that I was doing fuck all that he could ask to hang out on a moments notice and I’m just ready to go... but the fact that I didn’t even have to say that to Dillon & he straight out said “I know the kind of person you are and I know you need a plan. I’m spontaneous but I know you need a plan so that’s why I always try to plan things out with you so you have that clarity” damn. Like I know I’ve been close with Dillon for a while and yah we talk about everything but for him to be able to pick up on that and just know that because we’ve never had that kind of talk before like there you go, there’s someone that clearly understands me & for him to say that he believes that Richardt should learn that if he hasn’t already & make the effort makes me feel like maybe my expectations are valid. They’re high yeah, sometimes I feel they’re too high but then again man I just went through fucking hell with my ex, literally not to go put up with that shit ever again & know my worth & know that I deserve someone that makes the effort to get to know me. Tonight was tough. This weekend has been hard. This week itself has been difficult. We already argued on Tuesday about communication because that’s the center of all of our issues and disagreements but then to now just re-happen all over again this weekend, it’s just exhausting.  I already wrote this in my other daily app but it’s just draining when I feel like I conform to him and everything for him. Like idk. When we were in Vancouver with Blake & his wife & then even last weekend when Blake was here & we had a hot tub and the other friend said the same thing that Blake did that after the honeymoon stage their partners just ended up shutting off and all the things they did before the girl ended up being like ok I dont love it as much as you so go do this with your friends & it was funny because we laughed that it might happen with me with Richardt, even though I internally know that we genuinely do like the same things and I do love hockey and cars and that’s not really changing over time, but still it’s like everything we do is always what he wants. Yes I like Lord of the Rings dont get me wrong, but it was frustrating when he comes over tuesday night and yes besides the whole terrible communication again with coming so late & literally changing the entire evening plan yet again, still that was the first time he ever had asked what I wanted to watch & told me to pick, which of course I result to “no what do you want” fuck I’m so bad at that but still. It’s the same thing with details of his life. Like I know so damn much about him, I know so much about his childhood, where he’s lived, I’ve seen 1000 photos of his childhood and past 10-15 years, I know all about his family aspects and relationships, I know a lot of the small details like his favorite colors, hockey teams, players, favorite games, food etc. but I bet he can’t answer those for me. He doesn’t know what music I even listen to still, he doesn’t know my childhood or how I grew up or my family dynamics, he doesn’t know much about my past because he doesn’t ask questions. He probably wouldn’t remember that I draw or how much I actually love to bake. He only knows the immediate things in my life, the surface level stuff because he doesn’t ask, but then tonight apologizes for asking about the girl I met today and says that he’s interested in my life and wants to know, but kay cool you can say that but when you never ask me questions about my life, I’m not like him. I’m not just going to talk about myself and go on about my past or show you every photo without you asking. I think he still thinks that we’re like this same person that just because he tells me that his door is always open that I should just be showing up, he doesn’t realize that I’m not that kind of person. I don’t feel comfortable with that without making plans or until it’s been a long enough time that I know I could just show up. He doesn’t know that my anxiety sets me from not being able to live chaotically and live on a whim. He doesn’t understand that when a plan is made that that’s what I expect and it’s not that it can’t change but on a dime it makes me anxious and stresses me out to just completely change plans all of a sudden. He doesn’t know these things because sometimes I feel like he’s not paying any attention to me. I feel like he just wants to attention & wants the company & great I’m pretty and nice to look at but what about listening to me? What about actually striving to understand who I am and the reasons I act the way I do? Rather than just assuming that I’m just like you and that we can have this relationship that’s centered around you & your schedule. Call me a bitch but I absolutely played games this weekend. I hate that. I absolutely hate setting someone up to fail & playing games but damn man like how hard is it. Literally once again on Tuesday you tell me (after you cut our time together short to 2 hours & proceed to tell me how it didn’t matter if you had shown up an hour before but apparently that extra hour didn’t mean shit to you?) that you figured (again in your head because you dont communicate) that I would come over friday because it was a holiday and we would set up and decorate your christmas tree ( again because you’re the one that said you thought it would be cute if we did this together) before your friends came over and I said I had to work because that’s what I thought. Yet friday morning came & I had told you that I ended up getting the day off - game time - when you said you were heading out to run errands so I figured alright, if he said it earlier this week & if he actually wanted to he can actually communicate and vocalize if he wants me to come over early, but nope, failed that one. Made a reference to “when you come over later tonight” well alright then. So of course I come later. Again finding out today that you wanted me to stay over, cool did you even communicate that? No. I had told you last night that I had plans for the rest of the weekend and then when I challenge you after you tell me you assumed that I would just stay over & you would have loved it & I challenged you why you don’t just randomly come to my place because you know my door is always open just as much as yours and your answer was “well I wanted to this weekend but you’re busy with plans” how convenient to tell me at 9PM, again where was the communication? did you just expect that I was sitting around doing nothing & waiting for you to ask me to hang out? Like literally my brain hurts trying to understand this. How the hell do I read your mind? Not to mention that when I come over - again to a house warming with your friends that I’ve never met before where you’re occupied & you know how anxious I am so I felt extremely out of place - you ask me how I liked your christmas tree that you set up that day.... the day that you pre had said you “were hoping i’d come over” but never actually asked me to after I said I was free but then went ahead and did exactly what you said you wanted to do with me? Literally. my brain hurts. I honestly just simply don’t understand you. Every time I feel like ok maybe I understand how he functions then you go and do the opposite & I’m left in a daze wondering what the heck just happened. Like it’s chaos. I’m trying to damn hard to be patient when you continously tell me that I need patience because you haven’t been in a relationship for over 8 years, but how is that an excuse for not communicating to hang out??? If you like me as much as you keep saying you do & you tell me that all you do is think about me, then how on earth is it so damn hard to make plans with me?? I’m seriously lost. & now tonight you’re mad at me because I ended up not having plans this evening & you get mad why didn’t you tell me because we could have hung out & then tell me you had a long day (apparently doing nothing) and you were going to bed, coldest goodnight I’ve had from you in a while. I asked Dillon tonight if I was a bitch for stopping asking you to hang out. Because sure, understanding the last two months have been the busiest time with you moving, me moving, your parents moving etc, but still, I even fought this on you multiple times that you couldn’t have taken one single night to spend quality time with me. While I continuously have done anything and everything you’ve wanted. From going to random places last minute to look at random items you want to buy - literally driving you out to lethbridge to pick up a $150 speaker - to going by myself to pick up a TV for you, going to costco for over 2 hours to help you pick up every house item you need, help you unpack for weeks & organize your house, countless times leave my poor dog alone over night for long periods of time just because you “didn’t want to rock the boat with your condo board”, literally choosing to see you when you knew I worked every night and pushed off work until I got home at 10pm to work late while working two jobs and never complaining to you, after multiple times all summer asking you to go to car shows and come hang out or go for food with Dillon or whatever the case was with continuous excuses of why you couldn’t  and now you get upset at me that I don’t ask you to hang out. When 78% of the time I ask you, you say no or have an excuse. Why would I ask you? Why do you think it’s just easier for me to just wait till your free and make myself available for your schedule? Whatever fits in your schedule. Idk. Maybe I made that mistake way too early. Maybe I set this expectation for you that you think I’m at your becon call that whatever time works for you is when Ill make myself free. After the COUNTLESS times you cancel on me. Because I’m easy. Because I’m flexible, because I’m easier for you to say can we reschedule than you asking your friends or your parents to reschedule, because you know that I’ll just quietly accept whatever your plans are. I’m just tired and Im fucking sad. I’m sad that I feel like you don’t know me. I’m sad that I feel like none of this even phases you. Like you tell me you just want to be cared for and know that you’re appreciated and have attention but like, what about me? What about sacrificing for me? It was an absolute pain to try to get you to come over before Vancouver. It was like you were a magnet that just resisted coming here and when I called you out on it you didn’t even have an excuse. It was absolute hair pulling to try to get you to come over the night before we left, which yet again you literally came over at 9:40pm when we had to be up at 4am. It’s like, any time that you come over here or it’s on my dime that you push the limits to the least amount of time together, & I find it funny that last time I called you out on that you said “well you do that to me, you come over at like 7pm” yea... because I leave my dog all night and I still spend the entire morning with you, whereas when you come over, you come on a tuesday night where you leave for work at 6:30am so we dont even get to spend time together. I feel like i’ve complained enough. I’m just tired. It feels like the first month was great, you constantly asked and tried to make plans to see me & now it’s just blah. It’s whatever fits for you. Again, sometime’s I feel like Im just filling a void of attention for you and that you love spending time with me but you’re not getting to know me any more in that time. I get that it takes time, absolutely, but the fact that we’ve gone through your photos twice and I know so much more about your childhood and everything else about you than you know about me because I’m always the one asking questions & you still haven’t figured out yet that I’m not like you and I won’t just go on about my life without being prompted to or asked is what makes me sad. I literally watch Cody spend 3 straight days with his gf almost every weekend & yet I sit here wondering why I feel like it’s so damn hard to even get you to want to see me more than 2 times a week. You keep asking me if that’s enough or how much my idea is to see you, but you’ve never answered that question. I wont push you to see me more than you want. But I’m also done keeping my schedule open to you so that I always fit your schedule. If I only see you once a week or twice on a whim, so be it. 

[extravaguk]

pairing: jungkook x reader

summary: But above all things, the last thing you expected to happen when you came back was to show your tits and get pierced by none other than motherfucking Jeon Jungkook.

Jeon Jungkook. Guk. Gukkie. Jeongukkie.

wordcount: 15k

genre: summer!au, ex high school classmaters, kinda frenemies to lovers, tattoo artist!&piercing artist!jungkook, popular!reader

rated: m (fluff - smut - angst)

warnings: you broke jungkook's heart you bitch!! , oral sex (m&f), protected sex (shocking tbh), CL as your bestie it doesnt get better than that! idk i dont wanna spoil too much

author's note: fucking finally dude!! i've been writing this since february but school was kicking my ass. now that i finished my exams and mercury is in gemini i was able to finish it. if you read this, i hope you enjoy it!

Inkphoria

You've been standing outside the shop re-reading the word for fifteen minutes, although it definitely feels like it has been longer. You're gripping the flyer too tightly, rumpling the paper in your hand until you're pretty much sure it's ruined. It's the first day of June, and it's already too hot. The sun and humid weather are causing beads of sweat to form in your hairline and your white tank top to stick to your skin. Your jean shorts didn't feel this uncomfortable a few hours ago and you're sure the heat is causing your mascara to transfer to your eyelids and lower lashline. You've never needed a slushie and a smoke this bad in forever, even if you knew the later would make your parents lose their shit.

Inkphoria

You read it again. Your brain is trying to guess what font its written in, an excuse to try to steady your heart beat until your nerves ease a little and you can finally gather the courage to step into the damn shop. You've noticed a few people passing by giving you strange looks because maybe it hasn't been fifteen minutes. Perhaps you've been unmoving like an idiot in the middle of the street for longer than you want to admit.

Chaelin's voice echoes inside your head.

'Its not that much of a big deal. It's not even that painful, trust me.'

You wish you could trust your best friend, but your best friend is also the same woman who assured you Cats was the movie of the year. Yes, not 'Cats: The Musical'. 'Cats', the movie.

'And this could be a great start to get out of your comfort zone and start living your life exactly the way you want to, not the way people expect you to. Not the way your family wants you to, not the way Adam wanted you to.'

But although her credibility could sometimes be questionable - like that time she also told you she'd tried marmite and 'honestly, it's not as bad as people make it out to be'-, you also didn't trust anybody in this world as much as you trusted her. She had always been your entire support system, the only one around you who never sugarcoated, who always treated you as an equal, who was always there for you to help you discover yourself and, at the same time, remind you of who you were.

'And it's gonna look so hot, too.'

That's it. Sticking the wrinkled flyer on your back pocket, your feet finally start moving. It doesn't take longer than three strides and you're pushing open the door.

The first thing you notice is that, thankfully, the shop is empty. The second thing you notice is the bright sky blue walls, a green undertone peaking through. Your eyes scan nervously the interior. Frames with tattoo designs and people modeling other different designs decorate the walls, some skateboards also hanging from the ceiling. A few plants in the corner, and two leather couches on either side of the room. Your scanning stops on the counter, where a girl with short, platinium hair and -what you guess is- the eighty percent of her body inked. Face included. She's been looking at you, a smirk tugging at her lips. Her tone is amused when she speaks

"Hi." she says. "You can come closer, you know? We don't bite."

Great. As if you couldn't feel more out of place, apparently you also couldn't look more out of place.

"Sorry." you gulp as you walk forward. "It's my first time doing anything like this."

She laughs this time, but it's not mean. It's not mocking, thank God, and the smile she sends you is as warm as the weather, friendly, luckily helping you calm down a bit. "A virgin, huh? JK's gonna love this." your eyes jump in surprise, but she's fast to wave her hands in front of you. "Just a joke. So, first time getting a tattoo. You have something in mind, honey?"

"Um, no. Not a tattoo. Not yet, I think." you wet your lips, regretting not reaplying chapstick before stepping inside. "A piercing."

"Oh! Cool!" she claps her hands, too excited for your own taste, pulling from under the counter a catalogue. "So, where will it be? Cartilogue? Nose? A lot of people are getting their septums pierced right now, though, so you might-"

"Nipples. Like, one of them."

Her gaze finds yours in surprise, although her face swiftly transforms again into an amiable expression. "Now, that's badass. Alright!" she skims through the pages of the catalogue until she finds the nipple piercing collection. You scratch your head before wiping your forehead sweat-free. "You can pick either barbells or hoops, although barbells heal faster and they don't move around as much. There's different kinds of metal, too. Gold or platinium. If your skin is sensitive, I recommend titanium. It's hypoallergenic and not as problematic."

The blonde keeps talking as you nod your head, a smile making its way into your face while silently thanking her for her easygoing personality. It quickly makes you feel comfortable and stupid for being so terrified of doing this.

Once you decide, settle on the cost and sign the papers, she stands up from the stool she'd been sitting on. "Ok, I'll go tell my coworker. He's been sketching tattoos all morning, it's time he gets to work!" she laughs, but suddenly your smile banishes and your throat shuts down.

"He?" your alarmed tone halts her motions and she looks back at your frightened expression.

He? A he is going to pierce your nipple? You're about to let a random stranger, a HE, see and touch one of your boobs and then pierce a needle through one of your nipples?

"Oh, baby, don't worry. I'd do it myself if I knew how to, but I only do tattoos. Most of our staff are on summer vacation so it's mostly just him and I. If you don't feel comfortable, which is totally understandable, you can wait until september when Minzy comes back and she can do it for you." It's her turn to scratch the back of her head as she adds: "but trust me, we're professionals. He's not a creep or anything like that. He's been doing this for a long time. He won't cross any boundaries."

September? You won't even be here in september. Fuck.

Sure, you could do it when you move back into the city. But this summer was supossed to be the summer. You already decided after your breakup with Adam that there would be no trace of the old you. That it was time to push yourself, to do the things that you've always wanted to do, unapologetically. To find the new you, the real you. To stop being scared.

So after going through you options for a few seconds and taking a deep breath, you make up your mind.

"It's fine. I can do it."

≿━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━༺❀༻━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━≾

"JK, sweetheart!"

Jungkook is finishing drawing a Chinese dragon when Mijoo opens the door without knocking. Again. He puts the pen down, rubbing his eyes. It's monday, a slow monday, not much work, and he had hoped it would stay that way until closing time. It's summer and Jungkook hates summer. He hates the heat, he hates being drenched in sweat, and he hates the fact that he can do nothing about it. Because working in the summer is terrible. Summer makes him lazy, makes him want to bathe in a tub full of iced water and not get out until he turns into a raisin and october comes. It makes him irritable. Summer makes him annoyed by people -like Mijoo, even if he loves her to death- and himself.

"I got a girl here who wants a nipple piercing, her first piercing by the way, so get your shit ready and bla bla bla. Straight titanium barbell. Also, don't flirt and don't be creepy. She almost ran away when I told her a male was going to be touching and piercing her tit, be mindful of that. She's too cute, if you want to get her number you should wait until it's done. I think that's it. I'll bring her in in a minute."

Mijoo leaves as fast as she talks, but Jungkook is already used to it. He's already used to the headaches her mouth causes too. He sighs before standing up, tying his too-long raven hair into the best bun he can manage. He washes his hands, sets the table up, sits on the chair and puts the gloves on. He's too busy sterilizing the jewerly when Mijoo comes back with you.

"Alright, my babies. I'll leave you to it." she turns to you. "He'll explain everything, from how the process will be to how to take care of it after it's done." she leaves before saying bye, closing the door behind her, and then he finally turns to you.

Your eyes meet and suddenly everything stops. He almost drops the sterilizing machine, his whole body tensing, going into panic mode as he recognizes you immediatly. His hands shake.

Of course he does. Of course he recognizes his high school crush. The too goody two shoes, too pretentious and too rich, too good for everybody and, most importantly, 'too good for Jeon Jungkook' girl of his high school dreams. Of course he recognizes the girl he had confessed his stupid crush to when he was sixteen. Of course he recognizes the girl who rejected and broke his young and foolish heart when he was a dumb teenager.

It doesn't matter that six years have passed ever since. He still knows every lock of your hair like the palm of his hand. He still remembers the shape of your lips and the exact shade of your eyes. He can still identify the body he fantasized about -and jacked off to- when he was a hormonal teen, now filled in all the right places. Now a grown woman.

Just one look at you after years and years of pining is enough to almost make him faint. And grow a boner under his jeans.

And by the look on your face, your eyes wide and your mouth agape, you recognize him as well.

Dammit.

He schools his features and clears his throat. Forces his body to relax and compose himself, because he's not a teenager anymore. He's also a grown man, who has matured, who now has much more experience with women than he did back then. He had already embarrased himself enough when he was sixteen to be doing it all over again. You're just another attractive girl in a sea of attractive women.

He turns to you. You still haven't said anything. Neither has he.

"Um, you can sit on the table." he manages, motioning to the set up in front of him. He watches you taking doubtful steps until you're sitting down, your eyes avoiding his gaze. He almost forgot you were here to get pierced. Holy shit, you were here to get pierced. To get your nipple pierced.

You're a professional, Jungkook. You can do this, Jungkook. You've seen boobs before, Jungkook. You've pierced nipples before, Jungkook.

Clearing his throat again and forcing his hands to stay by his side, he speaks. "The... The top." your gaze finds his, like a puppy about to get scolded. You look at your top, realization dawning on you. "You don't have to take it off. You can just pull it down."

So you do, pulling the straps of the white tank top down and dragging the fabric down with trembling fingers. No bra. Jungkook gulps as your breasts comes into vision. As perfect as he had imagined years ago. His cock twitches. Round, full, perky and so damn inviting he has to hold himself back from latching onto one nipple with his mouth around it and swirling his tongue over the nub until you're a pretty, moaning, little mess on his piercing tabl-

He closes his eyes for just a second before reminding himself to act like the 23 year old Jungkook he's tried so hard to become. The confident, assured Jungkook he is.

"Okay, this is how it'll go. First I'll clean it and scrub it to get rid of any bacteria." he's so glad he hasn't stuttered yet. 23 year old Jungkook doesn't stutter like 17 year old Jungkook. He's also glad he can pick the alcohol bottle and the surgical scrub without trembling. When he faces you again, you're watching his motions with your lip caught between your teeth. That has him swallowing the lump in his throat.

Making eye contact with him again, you take a deep breath and offer a small nod, so he gets to work. He can show you and himself he's a grown man. A grown man who can pierce a nipple without appearing like it's the first time he's seen a boob in his life. The sooner he does it, the sooner it's over.

Jungkook wets the paper towel with alcohol before carefully wiping over your nub with it. Your back arches, probably from the cold feeling, he guesses. He rubs it a few times before throwing it in the trash can nearby. He avoids looking at how enticing the soft peak is salluting him when he reaches for the marker. He doesn't say anything when he dots it with it, jaw clenched and his dick painfully stiff.

"Lay back." his voice low as he commands, turning away to get the clamp. When he slides closer, he tries to ignore the view: you, with your hair sprawled and your sweaty, shiny skin and your eyes focused on the cieling, nipple fully erect, like the star of one of his most erotic dreams. He extends his free gloved hand before he can stop himself, fingers carefully working the nub until he's sure it's painfully hard. Almost as hard as he is.

You gasp, your back arching again. He stills and looks at you, your cheeks flushed pink. Probably from the heat, he guesses again. Or at least that's what he tells himself. He can't stop himself from wondering how responsive would you be in a different setting, most likely his bed while his teeth play with your breast and his cock dives into-

"You okay?" he studies your face, your eyes not meeting his and instead still focusing on the white ceiling.

"Mhm." you reply with a small voice.

"Relax, alright? It'll be over soon." his voice is as gentle as he can, his fingers mindlessly caressing your breast to try to soothe your nerves. Or maybe it's just because he's a selfish bastard. Whatever it is, he forces himself to bring the clamp to your nipple, securing it around it.

"Take a few deep breaths. This will only take a second of pain and then it will go away." He misses the way your mouth falls open, but he doesn't miss the way your eyes squeeze tight as the needle goes in.

"Ah!" he definitely doesn't miss that either. He goes rigid for a second, because that didn't fucking sound like a cry of painfulness. It's breathy, and whiny, not too loud and, for fucks sake, if that's how you sound when you're getting fucked, he swears to God-

He feels your heartbeat under his hands when he puts the barbell in and then the bandage over it. He takes a look at you, chest moving up and down. And then you take a look at him and what he sees is almost enough to take you right there.

Reddened cheeks, drops of sweat framing your face and those eyes glazed with something he's seen too much in the women he's fucked throughout his life. They're half lidded, mascara adorning your long lashes and almost smudged, looking right through him.

"Jungkook..." and your voice, as you say his name -acknowledging him for the first time since you stepped into his shop, for the first time since you were sixteen-, it's hoarse, almost inaudible, like you just came all over his-

He's on his feet in an instant like he's been burned. "It may bleed for the first week, and it can be really sore. The swelling will eventually come down." he's quickly tidying up the table, a bottle in his hand that he hands to you without looking directly. "Wash it gently with this soap and warm water once per day. Don't touch it. Wear a comfortable...bra. If it gets crusty, clean it with saline. Not alcohol or any other thing you might clean a wound with. The soap I just gave you or saline. Nothing else."

He's pacing around the room as he takes his gloves off and throws them in the trash bin, too agressively maybe, then he keeps rambling, like he's hurriedly trying to make you leave as soon as possible. "Avoid pools and the sea. It takes about six months to a year to heal, so don't... don't touch it, don't play with it or..." he clears his throat, "don't let anyone else play with it. And if it gets infected, come back immediately and I'll take a look at it." which he honestly hopes it won't happen. When he faces you, your top is back on and you're getting off the table.

"Alright, um...I'll do that." clearing your throat, your hand gripping the doorknob. "Thank you."

But right before you can exit the room, Jungkook says your name.

"_____." when you turn around to face him, it takes a few seconds for him to make eye contact from across the room. "It was good to see you."

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"Let me see!"

It's the first thing Chaelin says when she opens the door to her appartment. It's on the second floor, small enough to compare it to most expensive appartments you'd stayed in throughout your life, but big enough for Chaelin, her cat and her -impressive- collection of acrylic nail kits and pairs of high heels. It's also big enough for her to offer you the only guest room until summer is over so you didn't have to, one, stay at your parents' place, and two, find an appartment in a short period of time for a short period of time.

When you left years ago, you did so with the thought of 'never looking back'. You never really expected to return here, of all places. Maybe visit your best friend for a weekend at most, have dinner with your parents on a saturday and then go back to the new life you'd made for yourself on a sunday.

But that was before you'd caught Adam cheating.

Tale as old as time: childhood sweethearts get engaged, move in together, son of a bitch sleeps with the assistand he told his girlfriend not to worry about, and then the brokenhearted girl packs her bags and leaves the cheating bastard begging for her to come back.

You'd be lying if you said you were surprised.

Throughout your life, you'd learned to expect many things, regardless of being sheltered and babied by your family since you were born. Watched too much Maury and Dr.Phil. Too much Gossip Girl to know what the deal with life really is.

So, thankfully, you'd only shed a few tears, mostly because your ego and self steem were slightly triggered. You'd realize long before that your feelings for Adam started to disappear once he popped the question and you said yes. Your love story began as teenagers but soon after graduating, the two of you went on different paths: you'd matured, grown into your twenties while he got stuck at 17 and never stopped acting as such.

So yeah, whatever, break ups are hard. But they're not as hard when the love is gone and the sole reason to stay with your partner is to please your parents. You were also right when you expected your mom to tell you to 'forgive and forget' because 'those things just happen, it's not a big deal, honey'.

But above all things, the last thing you expected to happen when you came back was to show your tits and get pierced by none other than motherfucking Jeon Jungkook.

Jeon Jungkook. Guk. Gukkie. Jeongukkie.

The lanky nerd with braces, glasses and an anime obsession much bigger than his hentai obsession, which is saying a lot. The shy, awkward classmate who'd stuttered his undying crush for you when you were just kids. That one who you had rudely rejected like the bitch you used to be in high school.

But my God, Jeon Jungkook was anything but a kid now.

You were shocked. You were gagged. Couldn't seem to fathom what was happening and what your eyes were seeing. It took you a while to close your mouth when you realized JK was Guk. Gukkie. Jeongukkie.

With messy black hair, a smoldering gaze free of glasses, piercings adorning both ears, and his right eyebrow,, the braces long gone showing perfectly straight - but still bunny like- teeth. The clothes he wore were loose, all black, but it was impossible not to notice the muscles of his back and arms, covered with tattoos from his hands to his forearms. You'd bet there were more of them underneath the fabric.

It was awkward at first. You didn't know what to do, or what to say. Didn't know if he rememberd you. So you chose to stay quiet while your body chose to react like it had never been in the presence of an attractive young man in it's entire life.

And oh, did it react.

He was reluctant, his old timid demeanor peeking through his newly adopted persona. But as soon as those hands came in contact with your skin, your whole body was lit on fire. Like you were 16 and losing your virginity over again and it was the first time a dude touched your boobs.

There shouldn't have been anything erotic about it -besides the fact that your entire breasts were exposed-, it should've been just a professional procedure. But those gloved fingers touched and pinched and suddenly you were too aware of Jeon Jungkook and the way you were starting to sweat profously, not due to the heat of the season.

You tried to distract yourself by looking at the cieling and not at his gorgeous face. Tried to avoid thinking about Jeon Jungkook and how his mouth would feel wrapped around you. Tried not to think about the way your panties were a second skin to your folds, and how tempted you were to grind your hips until you recieved some sort of friction with the jean fabric of your shorts. You wonder if he noticed you squeezing your thighs together. You hope not.

And then the needle happened. You never thought of yourself as a particularly kinky person. Sex with Adam was boring for the most part and you'd lost your libido for a long time. Stopped thinking about sex altogether. But the pain. The pain mixed with his hand rubbing soothing circles on your breast and his voice, as sweet as honey, guiding you through it. It made you reconsider a lot of things you'd once dismissed as 'weird' or 'deviant'

You swear you almost came right on his table.

And then your eyes connected, you made the mistake of calling his name like a satisfied woman who still needed more, and it was all gone. He stood up like a scared cat, gave you a bunch of explanations about the aftercare that you barely grasped without even looking at you and pretty much rushed you to leave.

So you walked, all the way from the tattoo parlor to Chaelin's appartment, mortified, and completely humilliated.

"Are you gonna let me see or not?" your friend says expectantly as you finally sit down after chugging a glass of iced water. You sigh, placing the glass on the table before carefully pulling down your top. "Oh my God, it looks so cool!" she gasps and you can't help a smile while she studies it in amazement. "Did it hurt?"

"Um, I guess." you keep out the part where you almost orgasmed, obviously, stopping her hand from touching when she reaches towards you. "Wait, no. He said something about not touching it for like six months or a year, I don't remember."

At that, Chaelin's eyebrows quirk up. "He? It was a he? Was he cute, at least?"

"You won't believe this..." looking away for a few seconds, you take a deep breath. "It was Jeon Jungkook."

There's a pause, a silence that fills the room when Chaelin's jaw drops. "Jeon Jungkook...pierced your nipple?"

You close your eyes, bracing yourself for what you're a hundred percent sure is coming.

"Ha..." there it is. "Ha ha..." you still know there's more. "Ha ha ha..."

Chaelin laughs hysterically for about God knows how long, while you keep drinking your glass of water unfaced, your mind drifting back to Guk. Gukkie. Jeongukkie, his tattoos and his stupid gloved hands.

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You know he's here.

Everything was cool, you were doing alright, having a great time with your vodka sprite in hand and your cute white bikini on. Chaelin was by your side, the guys were excited to have you back and thankfully, you'd avoided most questions about Adam and they'd avoided digging too deep into the topic. You'd sunbathed the whole afternoon, kept away from the water like he'd told you and ate the Hawaiian pizza Yoongi insisted on ordering despite Namjoon's and Jimin's complaints.

It's at night, when you're a little tipsy and your cheeks are flushed, that you feel it. You'd barely noticed Taehyung disappearing to let in a new guest.

You don't see him, but you feel him.

You're sitting on the pool tile steps, legs dangling and the water baely reaching your belly to make sure it doesn't touch your very sensitive and newly pierced nipple. Your back is facing the sliding glass doors of Hoseok's house, but the moment you hear his voice, smooth but animated as he converses with Taehyung, your body wakes up immediately, back straightening, goosebumps forming on your arms and nipples tightening against the fabric of your two piece.

You don't turn around, instead opting for downing the remaining of your drink and coming to the realization that, of course, Taehyung, social butterfly who'd always got along with everybody and remained friends with most people from high school, still keeps in touch with Jungkook.

You ignore him when he enters the pool, still peering from the corner of your eyes while pretending to be engaged in Chaelin's and Jihyo's conversation. Your mind sabotages you by taking you to that day a week ago at the tattoo parlor.

To the warmth of his hand, to the few strands of hair that his small ponytail couldn't keep together, to the way his eyes focused on such an intimate part of your body, to the endless ink decorating his skin, to-

Great. Now your bottoms are wet and not due to the water.

You don't miss Chaelin supressing a laugh and her not so subtle elbowing. You glance at her in warning and try to keep calm for the next fifteen minutes until Jin proposes moving to the living room to watch a movie.

"I'm gonna stay here for a little longer, guys." you say, after clearing your throat. You needed some time to gather yourself before being in a confined space with Jungkook.

"Are you sure?" Jin stops by your side to place a hand on your shoulder as everybody starts exiting the pool. "It's Mean Girls! You love Mean Girls! You never miss a minute of Mean Girls!"

Rolling your eyes, you wave him dismissively. "I know every dialogue on Mean Girls like the back of my hand, I think I'll be alright, Jin."

When everybody finally leaves, you take a deep breath, covering your face with your hands in an attempt to get him out of your head. Damn Jeon Jungkook and his irresisitble glow up.

"You okay?"

The unexpected voice startles you, a gasp finding its way out of your mouth and causing you to jump on your seat, heartbeat erratic as you instantly recognize who it belongs to. Your hand grasps your chest as if that would do anything to protect yourself against him.

"Shit, don't do that!" you say, the words almost getting stuck in your throat as you see him approaching you, still submerged in the pool. The more he nears you, the less water depth there is and the more visible his torso comes into view. Wich was exactly what you'd been avoiding.

Because Jeon Jungkook was ripped, as you'd imagined when you first encountered him.

Broad shoulders and strong biceps and chiseled abs and veiny forearms. Drenched hair, a full sleeve of tattoos and water dripping from delicious tan skin and all just so very hard. That paired up with a loopsided smile that does nothing but make you shudder.

"Sorry." he doesn't sound apologetic at all when he says that, the smirk adorning his features telling. "You just seemed a little off." you advert your gaze when he pushes his hair back.

"I'm fine, just...just wanted to be by myself."

"Oh" Jungkook's smile disappears. "I can leave, if you want me t-"

"No!" you're not sure where that comes from and neither does he, judging by the look on his face when your eyes find his. Eyebrows raised and mouth slightly parted, he's as surprised as you and there's an awkward silence for a few seconds. "Um, you don't have to. I mean, it's not my house, you can do whatever you want." you sniff and tame your voice, trying to seem cool and collected like you didn't just practically beg him not to go.

Ironic, considering this was exactly what you had been fearing for the past thirty minutes.

And then he smiles. A knowing smile. A smile that says 'you just totally checked me out and now you don't want me to leave'. A smile that you would have never associated with Jeon Jungkook of all people years ago. A smile that makes you want to look away but still keeps you in place.

"Sure." he says, closing the space between the two of you slowly but still leaving enough distance. "So, how's it going?"

You clear your throat, head high and determined not to let this man, or any man for that matter, turn you into a trembling mess. You're still you and you're not easily shaken by the opposite sex. Or at least that's what you helplessly chant in your head.

"Everything's cool. I'm on summer vacation now," a little white lie, "so I decided to-"

"The piercing." he says, the smile never leaving his face. "I meant how's the piercing."

"The pier- right." you almost miss the step he takes forward, all too aware of his height over yours but thankful for the centimeters that being propped on the stairs added to yours. "It's-" you almost, almost miss his knee touching your knee and him slightly separating your legs with his own inch by inch. Or how your thighs open unvoluntarely to welcome him in and how you can barely find coherent words to speak. "It's doing-" or the way his smile disappears and is instead focusing his dark stare fully onto yours.

"It's doing well." you finally say in a whisper, not being able to bring yourself to be louder.

He hums. "May I see it?" Jungkook wets his lips with the tip of his tongue and the action and his voice is enough to make you nod your head, bewitched.

His movements are unhurried, his hand coming up to tentatively come in contact with the flesh of your clavicle. His fingers skim through your skin upwards, his touch is feather-like when it wraps around your throat. You pant, and he stops but he doesn't move away, his eyes still focused on yours, studying you, daring you to pull back, to tell him to back off. But just a simple touch of his and you're fully under his control. It reminds you too much of the day you got that damn piercing.

Your lips are parted and for a moment he stays just like that. His body so close to yours but not close enough, and his hand slightly gripping your neck. Your pussy clenches around nothing and you can't wrap your head around the fact that something so simple sets your entire being alive and leaves you aching.

Then, as slow as he started, his hand travels from the front of your neck to the back, pushing your hair aside to carefully untie the straps of your bikini. He breathes through his nostrils, doesn't make a sound. He seems so collected it's starting to annoy you.

Instead, your breathing is ragged when the top falls down, exposing both your breasts to him. That's when he removes his eyes from yours and his jaw clenches. Your nipples perk up under his gaze, like they remember him and the effect he had on them just a week ago. You're at least glad you're not the only one affected but he seems to be a master at keeping it under wraps.

Then, his hand moves again, leaving goosebumps on your skin as it goes south. Jungkook takes his time, so deliberate you want to scream, until he's cupping your pierced breast, keeping away from the nipple just like he'd advised you a few days prior. You can't look away from his face, from his eyes observing you like you're a full course meal and he's been starving for days. You feel drops of water falling from his hair to your thighs, his thumb caressing your skin so delicately as it faintly nears your still tender nipple. Just nearing it, never touching it.

"Beautiful." his murmur is almost imperceptible and for a moment you think you've imagined it. Your back arches on its own, breast pushed against the palm of his hand, almost like your body is begging him to come closer, to touch you more, to feel you all over. He meets your eyes briefly, gauging your reaction, before going back to your chest. Suddenly, the grip on your breast tightens, fingers ever so softly squeezing your flesh. From your throat comes a mewl, your eyes shut and your legs close around his waist.

"Jungkook, please..." you whisper when you open your eyes. He looks at you, unvertainty written all over his face, lips bruised as if he had been biting on them too hard, gaze as glassy as yours. And just like that, the spell is broken. He blinks and his expression changes completely. Lips forming a straight line and jaw tight. His hand retracts, fixing your bikini top over your breasts before tying it around your neck like it originally was. Meanwhile your eyebrows crunch in confusion. But when you're about to start asking questions, he clears his throat.

"It's healing okay." he steps back, avoiding your eyes. "I'll see you inside."

Jungkook leaves the pool like nothing happened.

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Jungkook is fiddling, fixing the position of his glasses and combing through his straight hair with shaky hands, habits he's tried so hard to get rid of in his sixteen years of existence but still finds impossible to.

He can't help it. He's always been like this: the quiet and awkward kid in class who sits in the back, a misunderstood puppy in a sea of stronger dog breeds that could eat him alive. An outcast. Too geeky for his own good. Notebokes full of Dragon Ball doodles on the margins of the pages, the shelves in his room stacked with Marvel figurines, and a closet filled with outdated clothes that he has been inheriting from his older brother.

He has never been the type to stand out, always being overlooked by people like he's invisible. He doesn't mind though. He'd much rather be ignored than getting picked on by bullies like he used to in elementary school.

He never gets invited to parties. Ever. He's a nobody who barely speaks, and when he does he either stutters or manages to embarrass himself in one way or another. He's seen the look on people's faces when they look at him. Their eyes seem to scream 'weirdo' everytime he gets acknowledged.

So obviously the only reason he was invited to this particular party had a first and last name: Kim Taehyung. The only kid in Jungkook's entire life who didn't look at him in a funny way, the only kid who took the time to entangle in a random conversation with him after class and who seemed geniune enough to make Jungkook feel comfortable.

He's not sure how it happened, since Taehyung mostly hangs out with the cool kids. But somehow it did, and now Jungkook is uncomfortably standing in a living room full of drunk teens, looking directly at you.

You, the one girl Jungkook had been pining on for God knows how long. You, who are obviously too pretty, too popular, and way out of his league. You, with your plaid skirt and your polo shirt and those legs that never seem to end. You, who are sitting with your friends in a couch, drink in hand and visibly tipsy. And yet, he doesn't think he's ever seen anyone pull of the 'drunk-rosy-cheek' look better than you.

He can hear your laugh through the music and he already thinks it sounds better than whoever is playing in the background.

"Come on, Gukkie! Her friends are leaving and she's all by herself now! It's your chance" Taehyung's obviously drunk too because it took Jungkook a while to decypher his exact words. He'd disappeared for a while and now that he's back, he's pushing Jungkook in your direction.

"This was a mistake, Taehyung." Jungkook shakes his hair and steps back, quickly glancing at the front door to prepare his escape. But his new friend's grip on his hoodie keeps him in place.

"Guk, listen. The only thing you have to do, is walk up to her, and say 'hey I think you're, like, really pretty. Just letting you know. Bye!' That's it. Jung- Dude, Guk, seriously, look at me." Taehyung grabs Jungkook's cheeks, squishing them between his hands and forceing him to face him. "You've been crushing hard on her for years, my man. We're graduating and you won't see each other again. What's the worst thing that can happen? Getting rejected?"

Jungkook's eyebrows draw together. "Um, yeah?"

"Exactly! Getting rejected is not the end of the world, bro! It just means keep trying on other girls!" Taehyung releases his hold on Jungkook's cheeks. "I just think you're going to regret not telling your crush she's your crush. Who knows? Maybe in the future you two will get married."

Jungkook snickers, muttering a 'yeah right' under his breath. Still, he can't help the smile that Taehyung's words always seem to pull out of him.

"Now," Taehyung playfully slaps Jungkook before turning him in your direction again. "Go get 'em, tiger!"

"Okay," Mijoo's voice slices through Jungkook's memories. She's sitting on Jungkook's desk, munching on her brownies and looking at her coworker expectantly. "And then what?"

He sighs, running a hand through his hair, sits back on his chair, already feeling the effects of Mijoo's baked goods. "And then I walked up to her, like a damn fool, stutter and all. And I say:" he clears his throat, making an effort to do his best teenage Gukkie impression."'Hey, _____, um, so, I think you're beautiful and I've had a crush on you since seventh grade, haha, just wanted to let you know.'"

Mijoo rolls her eyes, still chewing. "And then what?"

"And then she looked me up and down, giggled, fucking giggled, Mijoo, and said 'Who are you, again?'" Mijoo gasps and Jungkook closes his eyes, trying to force that recollecion out of his head.

"What a bitch." she can't help but laugh before apologizing. Jungkook merely shrugs his shoulders and takes another bite of his brownie. "She didn't say anything else?"

"She said something along the lines of:" he clears his throat again, this time, doing an impression of you. "'That's sweet and all but, you and I... we're not the same. And I have a boyfriend, so...' She said that like I didn't know, like I wasn't aware of the school's it couple! Like I was dumb!"

Mijoo nods. "And now you want to fuck her even more than you did in high school."

"I- No! Well, yes. Fuck, of course I want to sleep with her! But I just... can't."

"Why not?"

"Did you hear anything about what I just told you or were you too concentrated trying to get high?"

It's Mijoo's turn to roll her eyes. "I heard everything you just told me. I just don't understand what the problem is. You two were sixteen. Sure, she was a bitch about it, but Lord knows I've been a bitch my entire life and now I'm not anymore." Jungkook raises an eyebrow at that. "Okay, sometimes I can be nice. But the point is..." Mijoo finishes her piece of brownie before getting off of Jungkook's desk. "It's been, what? Nine? Ten years? People change, JK. You're the best example of that. You want to fuck her and she obviously wants to fuck you too. You're both adults." she wipes her hands on her shorts. "I think it's time you fulfill that high school fantasy of yours."

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You've made up your mind.

And by you, it means Chaelin has made up your mind.

It didn't take long to convince you though. That last interaction with Jungkook cause too many emotions stirring within you. It left you hot, it left you bothered, it left you confused. Sure, it also left you a little bit embarrassed like the first time, but above everything else, that interaction with Jungkook left you absolutely livid.

Because who the fuck did Jeon Jungkook, formerly known as Guk, Gukkie, Jungukkie, and currently known as JK, think he was to come near you, speed your heart rate's up, and then runaway like that?

You've spent days thinking about it. About that face, about that body, about those hands and- shit. You're doing it again.

You've spent days trying to push those intrusive thoughts. Spent days trying to bury what happened. You've spent days trying to keep quiet, not telling anyone about it and just wishing that stupid spark of desire simply went away.

But it has just been simply unavoidable. You haven't been able to ignore the sleepless nights with your brain drifting back to that night and forbidding your hand from slipping under your panties. Or the excessive amount of time during the day where images of him suddenly popped in your head and wouldn't go away, even with you squeezing your thighs to try to make the ache go away.

So you ended up ranting and ranting and ranting to the only person you could confide on, who is obviously your best friend. Your best friend, who's too smart for her own good and knows you too well for your liking. Because apparently your moodiness and snappy remarks couldn't go unnoticed.

And after explaining the fiasco over a bottle of wine -and minutes of endless laughing on Chaelin's part because, again, it's Gukkie you two were talking about and, according to her, this was "the most karmic thing I've ever seen"-, she gave you the best advice an older sister could ever give.

"Fuck him."

"I know right? Fuck him!"

"No. I mean, fuck him."

And now here you are. Right inside that room you stepped in weeks ago, confronting the man in question with the same confidence that has always distinguished you from others and trying to act like the fluttering inside your belly wasn't nauseauting.

"A date."

"Yes."

"You want to go on a date with me." this wouldn't be so hard if Jungkook didn't look so delectable in a plain white t-shirt and ripped jeans. You cross your arms over your chest, doing your best to not look down at the exposed skin of a man who obviously worked out a lot and apparently, never skipped leg day. "What's the catch?"

He's sitting on his chair, back resting comfortably and legs spread, narrowing his eyes at you and probably wondering why the girl at the front desk let you in without an appointment. Also, probably wondering if there was a catch to all of this.

"There's no catch. I just want to go to the fair this weekend. I'll ask Taehyung for your number and text you the date and the exact place we'll be meeting. Unless..." your quirk one of your eyebrows. "Unless you're already planning on how you'll chicken out this time."

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Of course, Jungkook says yes to going on a date with his high school crush but spends the following days overthinking every single thing.

He can't help but feel like it's kinda sketchy. What if you're planning your vendetta on him? What if you don't even show up and he ends up there looking like a damn idiot? What if you hate him and are just messing up with him? What if that incident in high school is going to repeat itself?

"If she doesn't show up, you simply move on and never speak to her again. It's that simple. She can't have that much power over you to cry about something like that." Mijoo had said that same day she let you in the tattoo parlor after you'd asked to see Jungkook. Jungkook's coworker hadn't even question you and just motioned you to Jungkook's room with a knowing smile on her face. Later that day, Jungkook had scolded her about it and she'd simply shrugged.

He considers cancelling, eyes reading the 'won't be able to make it, sorry (sad face emoji)' over and over again and fingers hovering over the send button so many times he's lost count. But then he remembers that comment of yours about him chickening out and Jungkook starts seeing red.

How couldn't you understand he's just terrified of you rejecting him one more time? Sure, Jungkook is now an adult who doesn't get butthurt over stuff like that. He's experienced too much after graduating from high school and he's a much stronger individual than his fragile self back was back then.

But something about you just makes him feel so... weak.

He still finds it impossible to concieve where he got the courage to approach you like that at Taehyung's pool, or how he brought himself to touch you for longer than a minute without coming in his pants. He'd enjoyed it too much. Allowing him to see you so exposed, just for him. He'd be so tempted to kiss you right there and then, to run his hands up and down your thighs and fully wrap your legs around him to let you known how much you'd affected him. Once you called his name, it was like he'd finally snapped out of it and backed away like he'd been burned by you. He spent the next twenty minutes trying to keep himself from pulling down his pants and jerking off in his friend's bathroom.

It's terrible. Because he feels like the teenager he used to be when you're around. Shy, insecure and overall a mess. You showing up in his life after so many years and now apparenly being interested in him seems like a dream that he's not sure he wants to keep being in or wake up from before it's too late and he falls back into that tumoltuous longing that will inevitably end up in heartbreak. His heartbreak.

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It's saturday night, he's standing by himself in the crowded fair at the spot. You're fifteen minutes late and he's already about to turn back and dip out. He feels too awkward and the nerves are eating him alive.

You're not going to show up. You're not going to show up and now he feels and looks even dumber than the time he told you he was crushing on you. You're not even going to show up and now he's going to come back home, get drunk by himself and curse your name for-

"Hey!" he turns around to the sound of your voice and sees you running towards him. "Sorry I'm late! I couldn't find my phone and spent like thirty minutes looking for it. Turns out, Sharon Stone, was taking a nap on top of it and I didn't even notice."

"Sharon Stone?"

"Chaelin's cat."

To be honest, he's too surprised to process your explanation right away. He might also be a little speechless because that sky blue sundress looks too good on your skin and your eyelashes are so long, framing your beautiful eyes, and your lips are all glossy and kisseable that it takes him a while to find his own voice.

He clears his throat. "It's alright." scratching the back of his head, he momentarely adverts his gaze from you in an attempt to not get distracted by how soft your hair looks and how much he wants to wrap it around his hands in a ponytail. "Um, where do you want to go first?"

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Almost an hour and a half later, when the sun has already disappeared and you're both surrounded by colorful lights, Jungkook decides to buy the both of you hot dogs and a drink and you both settle down on a bench.

You've been walking all over the fair, going from booth to booth, playing any game in sight Jungkook dared you to -he obviously had a competitive streak-: from the ballon and dart games, to the shooting games, to the bumping cars, to the ball-in-basket one. To say you were having fun was an understatement.

You'd almost regretted setting the date up. You were sure he wouldn't even show up and if he did, you were scared of how awkward things could get between the two of you. And if things were awkward, you were sure it would only take less than thirty minutes for the both of you to part ways and never talk again about such failure of a date.

To your surprise, none of that happened.

The conversation was flowing, both of you acting like you were strangers on their first date getting to know each other, which, to be fair, that's exactly what it felt like. There was a slight banter, teasing each other when one of you lost in whatever game you were playing while the other was obviously winning. There were laughs and a funny feeling in your tummy whenever you'd walk side by side and his arm brushed yours.

There was no stiffness on his shoulders, no mention of the past or your previous encounters, no acknowledgement of the blatant sexual tension you'd experienced before, not an ounce of avoidance whenever your eyes met his and he was even sure of himself enough to place a hand on your lower back or briefly interwine your fingers with his to guide you through the mass of people.

It felt like you'd both unspokenly agreed on making each other feel comfortable enough to have a good time.

"I didn't think you were going to show up, to be honest." you suddenly say, taking a sip of your strawberry juice and thankful to finally let your feet rest for a while.

Jungkook looks at you, hot dog mid air and eyebrows almost disappearing into his hairline. "You didn't think I was going to show up? I didn't think you were going to show up." you simply shrug, lowering your gaze seepishly, the beginning of a smile on both your faces. He surprises you by tilting your head in his direction with his forefinger. You watch him watching you, a little dazed, a little lost in how his dark hair messily falls over his forehead and his equally dark eyes study your face, his thumb swiping over your lower lip. "You um... There was ketchup right there." he lies.

"Oh" you say, feeling your face heating up. "Thanks. Red doesn't really match this dress." you manage a smile and tuck a lock of your hair behind your ear.

At that, he eyes your dress for a moment, mouth slightly ajar. He's debating on whether or not to say something but you beat him to it.

"I'm sorry, by the way."

"For being late? I already told you it's fin-"

"No." you shake your head. "For... that time when we were young and I was such a concieted brat." you say, looking away , trying to find anything else that's not his pretty face. "I thought I was a queen bee back then. I was annoying and rude, specially to you. I..." you lick your lips. The cherry glittery gloss was already gone. "I thought it was cute, what you said. There was no reason for me to act like that. I know this doesn't make anything right but..." when you turn to face him again, there's still the same expression on his face. "I'm sorry."

A few seconds go by before it's him who's shaking his head. "It's okay. It was a long time ago, anyway." he smiles at you, although it doesn't reach his eyes and seems sorta forced. You sigh, and he takes your hand. "Let's go to the ferris wheel."

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tell you're tense. You're sitting right beside him in the ferris cabin, your back is all straight, you're facing forward and he believes you haven't blinked for what feels like an eternity. He thinks it has everything to do with your conversation a few minutes ago. You were probably not content with his response but what could Jungkook do? There was really no point in apologizing for something that happened years ago, but at the same time, he didn't want to hold anything against you like a resentful asshole because it was really not who he was. But there was still a little bit of stingyness inside of him and he didn't know how to make it go away.

At the end of the day, here you were, on a date with him that you'd asked for, getting along and asking questions about him and laughing at his jokes and trying to start all over again.

But then the ferris wheel starts moving, and he finally understands why you look so uncomfortable.

It's the way you immediately grip his forearm, nails digging in his skin and he swears he hears the smallest gasp forcing itself out your throat.

"Are you... scared?" he tentatively asks.

You say nothing for a while, not moving an inch. He would laugh if you didn't look so pained about it.

"I don't like small confined spaces nor rollercoasters." you finally say through gritted teeth.

"It's not really that small and ferris wheels are not rollercoasters. " your nails dig deeper and he winces. "Okay, okay. You don't like small confined spaces nor rollercoasters, and that includes ferris wheels. So why didn't you tell me?"

"I don't know. I've never liked ferris wheels but you seemed excited about it, so..."

There's a silence after that in the environment, neither of you exactly sure of what to say or how to act. Until Jungkook moves one of his hands hands until it's resting on the one who's holding onto him for dear life, fingers caressing yours. The warmth of his hand spreads through yours and although it's almost July and you can already feel your sweaty back staining your dress, it's oddly comforting. What's more comforting even, is him twisting his body towards you and talking with the calmest and most soothing tone you've ever heard.

"Look at me." you do instantly, unwillingly, and kinda wish you hadn't. It's almost as if your body will do anything he says without question. Like he has some sort of power over it to just react however he wants. His eyes bore into yours and suddenly the cab doesn't seem so suffocating. "It's just you and me right now. We're not even on a ferris wheel." the corners of his mouth turn slowly upwards. You zone out the environment, suddenly too aware of him and how close he is and how loud the beating of your heart is to your own ears.

"Jungkook."

You swallow the knot in the back of your throat when he removes his hand from yours. It almost makes you protest, - now realizing you've losened the tight grip on his arm- , before it craddles your face, keeping you in place while bringing his body closer.

"You have to stop saying my name like that."

With his thigh touching your thigh, your whole demeanor melts. When he leans closer, and you feel his breath fanning over your lips, your eyes shut closed.

"Tell me I can-" he starts to say.

"Yes." you finish for him. He doesn't doubt on closing the distance between you two. His lips touch yours and your body shakes in excitement. It's just him lightly skimming your lips with his but it's already too much and at the same time, not enough. It has you deepening it, yourself moving closer when he kisses you again. It has you relaxing against him, the tenseness prior disappearing and making you arch your back when his tongue asks for permission.

But it's exactly then, the moment you open your lips to him, that has you losing your mind.

The sparks fly, traveling from your head to your toes and then settling on the pit of your stomach as soon as the kiss starts to turn desperate and rough. When he nibbles your lips with his teeth, it makes you mewl and whine and your nipples tight against the cotton of your dress. It makes the metal barbell to feel uncomfortable, slightly painful. And when he goes back to being messy and filthy with his tongue tangled with yours, your thighs close on their own.

He forces himself to pull his hand back and bring it down, finding the parting of yd opening them for him. "Wait," you say, your fingers wrapping around his forearm as you try to catch your breath."The ferris-" he shuts you up with another kiss.

"We're not on a ferris wheel." he reminds you, a soft whisper against your mouth. And for whatever reason, you believe him.

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"He fingered you on the ferris wheel."

"Yes."

"And you came before the ride was over."

You take a small sip of wine, your eyes focusing on the TV where a rerun of the Golden Girls is playing, although, to be fair, lately you haven't been able to pay much attention to anything else but a certain brunet with doe eyes and kisseable lips. "Yes."

She hums, stealing a handful of popcorn from the bowl between your thighs.

"How long did it took? Like five minutes?"

There's a pause in which you clench your jaw, your fingers twitching around the glass in your hand, and then you answer. "Probably less."

There's another pause, and then-

"Ha...Ha ha...Ha ha ha-"

You let her laugh. It's okay. You knew you had it coming.

Chaelin knows the pillow you throw right at her face is also something she had coming.

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It's not that you're mad.

Jungkook and you had a great time on that fair date, he made you laugh, bought hot dogs and drinks for the two of you and got you off inside the cab of a ferris wheel on record time with those magical, long fingers of his. Technically, there shouldn't be anything to be angry about.

Except it's been a week and you can't stop thinking about him, about wanting more, and about those words that he left you with after the ferris wheel ride ended, when you had tried to return the favor.

'Next time, maybe.'

And there hasn't been a next time.

The thought of texting him or giving him a call to ask for another date is persistent in your mind. It remains while you do the laundry or wash the dishes, while you shower, while you eat or while you spend your days at the beach with Chaelin. There's always the incessant desire to reach out towards your phone, unlock it and dial his number to beg for more.

But you'd never been one to beg, so you resist the urge everytime that feeling starts to creep up on you and it washes over you like a wave. You silence your phone and try to concentrate on making the most out of your summer.

It's one random night, when you're tiredly dragging your feet across Chaelin's apartment's carpet, yawning and ready to succumb to a well needed slumber, that you see your phone screen's lighting up with a message.

Your heart pathetically leaps inside your chest when you read his name.

'you free on saturday?'

You wish you could say you ghosted him, ignored his text and moved on with your life until it was him who begged you for another date. But the truth is you opened it in a matter of seconds and typed 'i'm free, why?' back in a rush with trembling fingers.

So now you're on the passanger seat of his car while he sits on the driver seat, the first saturday night of July, like he's Danny Zuko and you're Sandy Olsson, watching a vintage movie in a drive-in theater which plot you don't give a shit about, even if Jungkook's date plan idea made something inside of you churn with adoration.

And the only reason why you don't give a single damn about the movie playing in front of your eyes, is because you're hot. Way too hot. And the reason and cause is none other than the boy-now-turned-man sitting on your left.

You barely exchanged words when he picked you up, just rode in silence until you got to your destination and you bet he can feel as well as you do the tension in the air.

You've surveyed him a few times from the corner of his eye, noticing him fiddling with the rings around his fingers and shifting in his seat from time to time. And if the sight of his fingers bring memories that you've tried to bury to keep yourself from lunching towards him, a brief glance at his forearms, adorned with ink drawn through his golden flesh -doing a poor job at concieling the veins running underneath- and his skin-tight jeans wrapping those muscled thighs of his is enough to have you be the one squirming in your seat.

A woman can only endure so much, and you come to that realization thirty minutes into the movie.

"I want to suck your cock." you say, a stern expression on your face as you turn your body in his direction.

Jungkook frozes as your voice slides over him. It takes him a couple seconds to look at you, shock widening his eyes and parting his lips.

"Huh?" he manages, his grip on the steering wheel turning his knuckles white.

Without separating your gaze from his, you gather your hair and tie it in a ponytail with the hair tie previously around your wrist. You don't miss the quick glance he sneaks into the curvature of your neck and the valley between your breasts.

Inching forward, closing in on him, you place one of your hands on top of his thigh, the action making his whole body tense. "____..." he whispers your name in a warning that doesn't sound convincing even in his own ears.

You smile, your eyes never wavering from his as your hand inches upwards, slowly caressing over the fabric of his jeans until you finally come across what you were looking for.

His hand flies to your wrist, stilling your movements. "____, this is not-". He starts, but his voice gets stuck inside his throat when you palm his undoubtly growing erection.

"Shh." your shaky breath fans over his cheek and you force yourself on your knees on the passanger seat in a more comortable possition to stop the trembling to reach them.

You fumble with the belt holding his pants in place, then with the button and finally with the zipper. He helps you by lifting his hips to pull his jeans and boxers to his thighs and you have to bite back a mixture between a gasp and a moan at the sight below you. You haven't even seen Jeon Jungkook naked all the way, but the mere sight of his hard cock with pre-cum glistening on his crown is probably the sexiest thing you've ever had the pleasure of appreciating.

It gets sexier when you wrap your hand around the base and his body melts in the driver seat, throwing his head back with his eyes shut. It gets even sexier when you finally lower your head, swirling your tongue over the head before finally engulfing him fully in the wet warmth of your mouth.

"Shit." his voice is tight, uneven as his hand loosely grips your ponytail, as if careful not to accidentally hurt you and break the glorious moment.

Although you wouldn't mind at all. Because the moment your hands are on him, and your tongue is on his shaft, that's the only thing you care about. Your belly is twisting, an undeniable wet spot on your panties as the fabric sticks to your folds, and the more you suck Jungkook, the more you want from him. His earthy taste is addicting and the soft little whimpers he occasionally can't prevent himself from are making you want to milk him until he can't take it no more. There's this desire within you to whorship him and his cock like you had been dreaming for the past weeks.

"This is s-so fucking h-hot." he rasps between ragged breaths, the bobbing of your head, sliding up and down his dick as your hand works the centimeters your mouth can't take is about to make him faint.

"Getting a blowjob?" you joke, your throat starting to feel sore as you kiss his leaking tip.

"N-no." he draws in a rough breath when you take him all of him again. "You giving me a blowjob... T-the f-fact that anyone c-could see us..." he darts a quick glance at your body, your ass up in the air and your dress sliding down, almost exposing you completely. "The fact that-ah! Shit..." he squeezes his eyes when he feels a glob of your spit lubricating him.

There's a sudden need to make you feel the same, to touch your skin and have you shaking the same way you have him. So one of his hands travels from your spine, to your perked ass, finally dragging the cotton of your dress to allow himself to see your thin white panties. "The fact that anyone could see you l-like this," he murmurs, regaining a little bit of control when he squeezes one of your cheeks. "letting t-them see you s-sucking my cock and..." he smirks when he feels you gasping around him, his fingers trapped between your thighs and pushing them inside your heat easily "and letting them see me fingering this pretty little pussy."

Soon after that he's cumming in your mouth while you're cumming around his fingers.

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At first, it's mostly on weekends when you see each other. Weekends of stolen kisses and soft sighs and whispering against each other's lips. Then weekends turn to week days, sitting on grass while sipping on refreshing beverages, drawing each other laughs, elbows touching as you walk around the park side by side because the both of you are too scared to interwine your fingers together.

Jungkook feels content like this: sitting on the sand with you between his thighs, admiring the sunset while nuzzing your neck and inhaling your scent every now. He likes waching you enoying your strawberry ice cream, almost forgetting the chocolate chip one already melting in his hand.

"If you were an ice cream flavor,which one would you be?" you ask him, relaxing against his chest.

"Rocky road."

"Why?"

He shrugs behind you. "Everyone likes rocky road."

You hum, playfully rolling your eyes. "What about me? Which ice cream flavor would I be?"

"Lemon sherbet, in the summer."

"Lemon sherbet? Out of all of the flavours out there, you're rocky road and I'm lemon sherbet?"

"Lemon sherbet, in the summer." he corrects.

"Okay, fine. Why?"

"You're boring and basic."

You gasp, trying to feign outrage but not being able to repress the laugh that escapes your throat. You elbow him, his laugh mixing with yours while taking the time to wrap his arms around your form, the breeze blowing your hair allowing him a spot between your neck and your shoulder. "You're boring and basic, but once you have a taste..." he presses a small kiss on your skin, causing the tiny hairs on the nape of your neck to rise. "Once you have a taste, specially on the hottest day in the middle of summer, you can't stop tasting and licking until there's no more lemon sherbet left."

You suck in on a breath when he craddles your jaw to face him. "It's been my favourite flavor since I was a kid." he kisses you immediately after, his lips swallowing the small whimper now stuck in your throat.

You close your eyes as his tongue opens your mouth, arousal blasting your insides and something much, much deeper that you fear to even name shredding your chest.

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The beginning of august comes faster then you two realize, but what you both do realize is how hard it's becoming to stay away from each other.

It's been thirty days of dates happening almost everyday, sharing high school memories and anecdotes of the time you spent away from each other. Hours of getting to know each other and opening up to each other. From failed relationships to new friendships. Of park dates walking side by side and fingers now interwined because you both realized one day that, fuck it.

It's difficult to sleep when you realize you're starting to catch serious feelings for somebody who was just supposed to be a fling. It's hard to sleep when his face, his voice and his touch and thoughts of missing him when you don't see each other start haunting you at night.

It's hard for Jungkook to focus on work when you're everything that's occupying his mind. Because he has a hundred sketches to make but he's too busy thinking about the hundred different sketches he would make of you.

It's hard not to send him a goodnight text, just like it's hard for him not to reply in a matter of seconds, almost as if he was already waiting to recieve it.

Jungkook thinks of you at night. Of how pretty and absolutely perfect you are for him. Of the taste of your lips, the way your hair feels between his fingers, or the flush on your cheeks when he makes you cum as droplets of sweat accumulate between your breasts. He thinks about your voice. He also thinks about the amount of hours left to be able to listen to it again.

But mostly he thinks about how ridiculous this situation is. Because he was stupidly crushing on you when you were only teenagers, daydreaming about a chance with you. And now his crush is long gone and he's starting to realize that he's falling, and falling fast.

You, too, think of Jungkook at night. Of his ability to bring a smile out of you, to soothe you with just a few words and filling your belly excitement, happiness and feelings you're sure you've never felt before.

Jungkook's managed to imprint himself in your dreams, and you, in his.

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Getting drunk with Jungkook is fun and messy.

It's fun because he lets loose, he stutters a lot like he used to do when he was a teenager and he makes you laugh louder than ever before. It's messy because he has no control over his hands as they explore your body, clumsily taking your clothes off as his mouth laps at the breast he's allowed to touch.

He's more forceful and dominating too, pinning your hands above your head, and commanding you to keep them right there, on the pillows of his bed. When you rebel against it, your fingers finding the hard planes of his chest, he pulls away from you and places them back where he left them. "Don't make me tie you up." he threatens, and your body shudders beneath him.

He sucks, and bites and leaves marks all over your skin, grunting in response to your moans. Creating a path of kisses from your lips to your stomach, his shoulders separating your knees, opening you up only for him. And thankfully, when you reach down to tug at the strands of hair framing his face, he lets you, because he knows you need something to hold on to the moment his tongue eats you up. He leaves his fingertrips on your thighs as he keeps you in place, not allowing you to runaway. Just forcing you to take it as he takes from you.

And when you cum, he doesn't back away. He keeps sucking, and licking and punishing you with his mouth until you're cumming over and ove again, screaming and begging for his cock.

Having Jungkook over you, both completely naked, skin to skin and only sweat in between is more than you could've ever fantazised about. He slurls your name when he puts the condom on. He would do anything to feel you raw, but he also knows he wouldn't be able to last a minute. The sight of you spread open, with your cheeks darkened by a crimson blush and your hair tangled all over his pillow is a picture he wants to keep forever.

He enters you when you call his name, your voice dripping with need. He stretches your warm and wet felsh, slowly easing himself into you at first, until he's fully inside and your bodies are completely in union. A shiver runs down Jungkook's spine when he looks at your contorted face in pleasure, your lips forming an 'O' and your pussy clenching around him.

"Oh, my God." you moan into the dark of Jungkook's room, and even then, he can clearly appreciate every curve of your body lifting off the mattress to connect with his. He lowers himself on his elbows on either side of your head, caging you in and capturing your mouth with his.

"I know, baby." he murmurs. It's hot, in the middle of August but suddenly Jungkook doesn't hate summer as much as he used to. Not with you sharing the heat with him. "It's way beyond what I could ever imagine." You nod hurriedly against his lips, your arms finding their way around his neck as he starts rocking in and out of you.

"It's too good." you cry, when he hits a particular spot that has you rolling your eyes in bliss and gripping his waist tighter with your legs against you. Your fingers thread through his hair, not bothered by the beads of sweat gathered on the nape of his neck.

"Too good..." he agrees, not missing the shiver that's shaking your own frame when he picks up his speed. "You have no idea what I would do t-to fucking feel you with n-no barriers between us," his movements become frantic as his hips slap against yours, his jaw clenched as he keeps talking, "to s-stuff you full of my c-cum over and over again until it won't stop d-dripping."

Jungkook's voice against your ear has you trembling and your orgasm nearing closer, your nails scratching down his back as his thrusts overpower your form. "Would you like that?" he asks with his voice strangled.

"Y-yes. Anything y-you want."

"You'd take all of my cum like a good cum-slut?"

You hate the fact that that's what makes you come undone. The twisting and knotting in the pit of your stomach finally snapping until you're holding on to him like you never want to let him go and he's following soon after.

Because if Guk, Gukkie, Jengukkie was not only able to make you come in less than a few minutes with his fingers or his tongue, but he was also able to make you cum instantly just by calling you a good cum-slut, that means you're fucked. Like, really, really fucked.

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There's a knot in Jungkook's stomach and a suffocating grip around his vocal chords as he caresses your skin. The sun is rising in the distance with the first rays of light entering his room through the window. Your shamphoo is intoxicating him, numbing him and enticing him to bury his nose in the tangled curls pressing against his chest. Your arm is thrown across his stomach, your breathing leavig goosebumps all over his body.

"It's too early. Go back to sleep." you mumble against his heart. He wonders if you can feel it dangerously speeding up.

"I can't." he says, voice struggling to stay balanced. "I have to tell you something."

You hum in response, sleep still interwined with your body, your arm tightening around him. You sigh in content, expecting him to elaborate.

He wets his suddenly dry lips. "I don't want this to end. In fact, ____.... I want more. Need more."

"Jungkook..." your whole body goes rigid right away, untanglling your bodies from each other and sitting up on the mattress.

"No, listen to me." he mimicks your movements, rapidly grabbing your hands to make you look at him. His eyes are expressive, a mixture of fear and hope swirling in his dark irises. "I wake up everyday, and you're the first thing I think of. I go on about my day, and I keep thinking about you, wondering what you're doing and counting down the hours until I get to see you again. I spend every night dreaming about you, and when we'e together, the only thing I can think about is how I wish I could stop time so I don't have to say bye to you the next morning. ____, I-"

"Jungkook, stop please." you shake your head, pushing away from him and in desperate need of air. You press a hand against your chest, beating back the throb of pain while the other curls in a tight fist, the feeling of your fingernails digging into your palm less painful than the ache inside your heart. "This... This wasn't supossed to happen, Jungkook." you start pacing around the room, as if trying to find an exit while avoiding his gaze. "This was just a summer fling. That's all it was, I'm supposed to come back to the city in two weeks and-"

"A summer fling?" a sardonic sneer comes out of him. "Oh my God, I can't believe this is happening again..." he mumbles to himself before rising from the bed. You stop immediately, a shiver quaking through you as his impressive frame intimidates His eyebrows are drawn together and his dark eyes are void of any prior emotion. "You're going back to the city in two weeks? And you didn't care to tell me until now, after I just spilled my guts to you?"

You eyes fill up with uncomfortable tears, reaching one arm towards him. "Jung-"

He flinches, taking one step back. "A summer fling is all I mean to you?"

"Ju- "

"Look me in the eyes, right now, and tell me that's all I mean to you. A summer fling." panic crawls up your throat. There's the need within you to confirm, to stare into his beautiful and stern eyes and tell him that, yes, that's all he is to you. But you've never been a good liar. So nothing comes out. You opt for wrapping your ams around yourself wishing they were his and lowering your eyes to the ground. "I think... I think you should leave."

Those are the last words he says to you, and the last thing you see when you turn around one more time after gathering your clothes, is his back as he looks out the window.

You allow yourself to cry the exact moment you step into Chaelin's apartment. Your friend is sitting on the couch, bowl of cereal in hand and a fresh cup of coffee sitting on the livingroom's table.

"Hey, you're early tod- Baby, what's wrong?"

"Please, don't laugh."

That morning, you lay down for hours on the couch with your head on Chaelin's lap while she softly brushes your hair as you cry, hiccup, fight through the pain in your heart and relate to her as best as you can the latest events.

She doesn't laugh at all.

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"She'll come back." Mijoo's slurred words do nothing to put Jungkook's state at ease that night. He simply shrugs, fingers clenching at his sides, frowing into his drink before gulping down the bitter taste of vodka in one shot. "Seriously, I think she's just afraid. My ex was the same."

"Comparing her to your ex is not the analogy you think it is."

"Ugh, shut up. Things didn't work with my ex because she was a bitch." Jungkook gives Mijoo a pointed look which she responds to by rolling her eyes and sipping on her rum coke. "Your girl is not a bitch. She used to be a bitch. What she did this morning was bitchy, but, like I said, she's just being a pussy. If she only wanted sex with you, she wouldn't have been doing couple stuff with you the entire summer."

"Whatever. I don't care." he lies and Mijoo knows he's lying but decides to drop the subject fo now.

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"We can't keep spending our days smoking weed." Chaelin speaks over Blanche's voice on the TV.

"I know. I'm just sad."

"You have to come back and tell him how you feel."

"I know."

There's a beat of silence before your friend kicks your thigh with her feet.

"I know and I will." you mumble through red eyes and smoke clouds.

≿━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━༺❀༻━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━≾

It's September first and it doesn't feel like Jungkook's birthday at all. He's been trying to focus on his work, alternating between isolating in full hermit mode and hanging out with friends to drink away his sorrow. The days have gone by and before he could realize it, he woke up today with over twenty text messages wishing him a happy day and a throbbing hangover.

He dresses up on autopilot. First a cotton shirt, then a pair of jeans and lastly, his Nike's. He doesn't bother tying his sneakers just like he doesn't bother taking a shower. He smokes a cigarette for breakfast, the death stick making him feel nauseaus on an empty stomach. And then he goes to work.

He's been repeating the same routing for the past weeks and he's not thinking of changing it, not even on his bithday.

He spends hours drawing, tattooing and drawing some more between yawns. He ignores texts an phone calls and simply waits until the day is over to go home, go to bed and forget about the fact that you're probably on your way to the city and that he hasn't crossed your mind not even once.

≿━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━༺❀༻━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━≾

Inkphoria.

You've been standing outside the shop re-reading the word for fifteen minutes, although it definitely feels like it has been longer. You're gripping cup of ice cream as it melts down your fingers the more you wait. The shop is already empty and it's starting to darken out side, and still you're so hot. Your shorts are heavy and your tank top is sticking to your skin. You didn't even bother to put on any make, although your eyebags definitely needed some concieling and your lashes some dimension to hide the fact that you'd been crying for the last few days.

'You're crazy about him.'

Chaelin's voice echoes inside your head.

You've lost count of how many times your best friend has given your advice, or simply encouraged you to do something you've been too scared to try.

'And he's cazy about you too.'

Chaelin might be wrong about marmite and the movie Cats, but she's definitely now wrong about anything regarding your and Jungkook.

That's it. You briefly close your eyes, inhale a deep breath then release it slowly. You start walking. It doesn't take longer than three strides and you're pushing the door open.

The tattoed blonde looks up from the counter the second you come into view. She smiles at the distance between you two. "You can come closer. I won't bite."

You clear your throat, stalking closer to her. "Is he-"

"He's in the back." she replies before you can finish you question. You close your mouth, clear your throat and nod your head.

"Thanks, Mijoo." she gives you a small wink, her smile easing your nerves like she had three months ago.

She watches you disappear. She shakes he head, her smile meeting her eyes. "I told him so."

≿━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━༺❀༻━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━≾

Jungkook ignores the knock on his door at first. It's almost ten and the parlor is about to close. He just has to finish this last fucking sketch so he can grab his shit and go the fuck ho-

Knock knock.

He growls, exhasperation cursing through him. He runs a hand through his messy pile of hair, his rings tangling between the strands, making him wince in pain. "Come in." he grunts under his breath. The door opens. "Mijoo, I really have to finish-"

He stops dead in his tracks as soon as he sees you.

"Hey." you say after a moment of hesitation.

"Hey." he replies and although there's something inside, deep in his chest, shouting at him to stand up, run up to you and kiss your face while he tells you how beautiful you look right now and how happy he is to see that you're still here, he decides against it. "Listen, ____, I'm pretty busy-"

"No, you listen to me." you cut him off abruptly. He looks taken aback and is already opening his mouth to say something, but you're not having it. "Please, just... Let me talk."

Silence looms between the two of you for a while, a staring contest defying each other to back down. When you take one step inside and close the door behind you, he sighs and leans back against his chair.

You move towards him slowly, your lip caught between your lip going through your mind for the speech you'd been preparing the last few days. Your hands are sticky due to the the sugary treat liquifying in your hand. "I know there's no reason you should give me another chance after rejecting you in high school, and there's definitely no reason why you should forgive me for the way I shut you out a few weeks ago. You've been confessing your feelings to me since we were teenagers, and now it's my turn to tell you exactly how I feel about you."

"Jungkook, the truth is... I like you so much. I like you more than I've ever liked anyone. Ever. I said this was just a summer fling, and I was lying. I was lying because there's no way a simple summer fling could make me feel the way you do. There's no way a simple summer fling could make me want not just summer with you, but also fall and winter, and spring and every summer that comes next."

You hadn't realize when your eyes filling up with tears until the sight of him starts blurrying in front of you. His fingers reach yours, his thumb comforting on your skin. "____, it's okay-"

"I'm not done yet." you sniffle, gathering enough courage to continue. "I brought you a lemon sherbet because you said it was your favourite. But you also implied I was your favourite, and I want to keep being you favourite, but now it's already melted and-"

The corners of Jungkook's lips start pulling upward as he tugs you towards him, his heart loudly jumping inside his chest. "Shhh, come here."

He takes the ice cream from your hand and places it on his desk. Then he's helping you onto his lap, your head tucked under his chin and your arms wapping on their own around his neck.

He doesn't care about your sticky fingers or the wet stains of your tears in his shirt. The only thing he cares about is the fact that you're right there, letting him engulf your frame and drown in the scent and warmth he'd misses so much.

≿━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━༺❀༻━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━≾

The first day of June has Jungkook sweating and wishing for a haircut. Jungkook usually hates summer. He hates the fact that he has to shower at least twice a day, and the fact that the heat is almost unbearable to sleep in and also the fact that he's easily sunburnt.

This year, however, Jungkook likes summer a little bit more.

"Excuse me, miss. Do you have an appointment?" it's the fact that you're starting to wear those summer dresses he loves so much, and the fact that your skin glows under the sun like glitter, and also the fact that he can lick ice cream off of it whenever he desires.

"I am the appointment." your giggle is almost childlike, playing with Jungkook's heart strings. You shut the door behind you, nearing him. You also seem to always have that flush on your cheeks. Although he likes to think part of it is due to him. He doesn't say anything else as he puts his pencil down and instead turns around in the chair to have you immediately on top of his thighs.

Yeah, he also likes the path your lips trace from his cheek, to his jaw, ending at the juncture between his neck and his shoulder. It still makes his body quaver to this day.

"Let me see." he murmurs against you forhear, his hand already working on unbottoning the front of your dress.

"Mijoo hasn't left yet." you whisper back, your smile impossible to supress and the faint whimper impossible to hide when his fingers expose your breast and tug at the titanium barbell adorning the already hardened nub.

Jungkook loves knowing he was the one to do that, and also the only one to play with it. He doesn't hesitate when he dips his head. "As if we'd ever cared about that." he adds, wrapping your sole point in his mouth.

He fucks you on his studio table with your legs around his waist and his tongue playing with both your breasts, the tattoo sketches long forgotten, scattered on the floor as he whispers against your flesh something that sounds a lot like 'I love you'.

[poppy-metal]

"The first time you hear Izuku moan your name, its with you hiding on the other side of his closet door, your hand clapped over your mouth in shock.”

A/N: im placing this before the sexual side of their relationship begins. A prelude of sorts, if you will.

Cw: voyeurism, smut, dekus secretly dirty mouth.

All things considered izuku’s room was...not as gross as you expected a staple college aged guys dorm room to be. It was cluttered but not disgusting, posters of comics and figurines and manga and some clothes strewn about, everything kind of frenzied and haphazard. It was so incredibly deku, a secret smile pulled at your lips, even though your reasons for being here were less than innocent

He’s wearing fucking pink. Because of course he is, of course izuku is humble and comfortable in his masculinity enough to pull off a bright pink t-shirt. It hugs his chest too, and you have to wonder if literally any of his clothes fit him and the tits he decided to grow in college. His image is so utterly imposing, his smile so bright, and laugh so airy, it sends butterflies flipping through your stomach at just the sight of him and that makes you want to vomit. Your lips curl in a sneer and you’re walking towards him and the group of friends he’s talking to as if on reflex. 

Stupid, lovely deku. You knock your shoulder into his as you pass, hard enough that his books clatter and fall to the floor, scattering. And then those green eyes are on you, giving you his attention and your body feels alive, your blood cells buzzing under your skin even as he frowns. The dimples on his freckled face fall as he takes you in. Yes, you think, look at me, see me, want me. 

Out loud you say. “Watch where you’re going, stupid deku” and you’re looking at him like he’s the dirt under your shoe. He’s not. He’s the center of your universe. Your world tilts around his axis. “Pink isn’t your fucking color by the way”. it is. 

Izuku huffs. He’s past the point where he used to turn as red as a tomato and duck his head whenever you stood in front of him, but he’s still deku at the end of the day. An easy target. “If looking at me bothers you so much you could just ignore me.” He crouches down to pick up his things. His words make you itch, if you could ignore him, you wouldn’t fucking be here. Its because he exists too much, that you want to push him down so much. 

You step your manicured foot onto his notebook right as he’s about to grab it. He tugs at it, you dont budge, and he looks up at you, exasperated. “Can i have my notebook, please?” 

Why is he so fucking pretty? God, you want to throw up. You dig your heel in further, covering the flutter you feel in your chest with a practiced sneer. “I like the way you say please, deku.” You lean down a little, “Say ‘your highness’ and i’ll move” 

It’s a thrill, seeing the way his jaw sets, his brow furrows, his eyes go annoyed. Sweet, sweet, friendly izuku. You’re the only one he looks at like this, like he wants to throttle you. But he won’t. You see his adams apple bob, his cheeks dust pink, even as he glares. “No” 

You pause. It’s not the first time he’s gotten snippy with you, but the conviction behind it is new. You feel something in your stomach give a jump, your blood thrumming in your ears. You jerk your foot towards you, sliding his notebook out from his hands and standing completely on top of it with both your feet now. Your sticky lips, glossy and plump, spread into a mocking grin, “No? Do i need to slam you into some lockers and take you lunch money?” You feel a thousand feet tall, towering above him still kneeling, you on the high ground, looking down at him below you, where he can’t reach you. Can’t ever see the truth. “C’mon pansy, you’re already on your knees anyway” 

But he isn’t anymore. He jerks to a stand, and now he’s taller than you, but you puff your chest out, not letting that affect you. It always affects you. Not that he knows or ever notices. Your eyes are widening when he steps forward so you’re practically nose to nose and chest to chest. “I don’t have time for you” he snaps, irritated. And then he’s stepping away as suddenly as he stepped up, the rest of his things gathered in his arms, he shakes his head at you, a tendril of that mossy mousey hair falling into his eyes. “I gotta get to class” 

And then he’s gone, brushing by you, disengaging. You stand there, your breath stuck in your chest, not moving. ‘I dont have time for you’ over and over again rings through your head like a mantra. You step off his notebook robotically and kick it across the floor. It bangs against a wall and you feel your fists clench, nail beds digging into your palms harshly. ‘I dont have time for you’ 

You turn on your heel, away from the direction of your class, fury blinding you. Anger in place of humiliation, vindication in place of being humbled. You don’t know what crawled up his ass and made him think he was above you all the sudden, but you weren’t having it, not the fuck at all. 

And that’s how you found yourself snooping through izukus dorm, with the intention of finding some kind of dirt, or something to hold over his stupid head. He didn’t have time for you? How dare he act like he was better than you, like he had things more important to do than to indulge you. You were still so mad you wanted to throw a tantrum, kick and scream and claw his eyes out. Straddle his stupid broad waist and shake him until all he saw was you, you, you. 

You really hated him. Hated that because of him you were basically a bully because any attention from him was attention you thrived and lived under. Maybe if you weren’t so prideful, so disgusted by the weakness of your own gooey emotions for him, you would have tried to be the center of his attention in a nicer way, but as it was you were in too deep. This was the sick game you played, and losing wasn’t an option. 

You hated how much that made you similar to bakugou in a way. You didn’t like that guy, and even weirdly so, you wanted to gouge his fucking eyes out for the way he treated and talked to izuku. Was it jealousy or possesivness that drove you to want to be the only one who could rile izuku? You wondered, sometimes, if bakugou felt the same way about you. 

It was the loss of control, for you. Better yet, it was the way you liked the loss of that control. You had always prided yourself on being strong willed and a perfectionist. But whenever your eyes so much as grazed izukus, all your emotions went rattling around your stomach in sick twisted ways, giving you goosebumps, making you...nervous. It was a crush that had turned into an obsession, wasn’t it? And you wanted to make izuku suffer not only for invoking those messy feelings, but for not seeming to return them as well. If he couldn’t love you or want you romantically or sexually, you’d force yourself onto his radar and into his head until thinking about anyone else was impossible. Until you squirmed under his skin as much as he squirmed under yours. 

Acting like you didnt exist was unacceptable. Obviously you’d slacked off on your taunts and actions, if he could just brush past you so easily, not taking your bait. You needed to even the playing field again, and by even you meant you needed to be towering above him again. 

Towering over him so you dont have the time to think about how much you want to be under him, your mind whispers at you as you pick through his room, trying to find anything incripting. Someone like izuku would probably have something utterly embarrassing like a diary or some weird porn magazines, shameless, helpless guy that he was. 

You huff as you open his drawer next to his bedside, nearly slamming it back shut in shock at what you see there. 

You’re not stupid. You’re a healthy, young woman with an active sexual imagination and access to the world wide web, to porn. 

Izuku has a fleshlight in his drawer. Izuku has a sexytoy. Izuku. And its green. 

Izuku has a sex toy that he probably uses. That he probably sticks his cock into and moves- 

An absurd laugh barks out of you, shocked and helpless. Because while in your head you knew izuku had to be some kind pervert, what other explanation was there for the way he blushed and darted his gaze around like a ping pong ball whenever you leaned forward and get caught a glimpse under your blouse, this is...unexpected. Imagining izuku in explicit scenarios, doing lewd things, it was something you didn’t allow your mind to wonder to often over. You didn’t like the way you got all squirmy and meek whenever you thought too long about izuku without clothes. 

You feel kind of squirmy now, hot and uncomfortable as you shift around and try to gather your wits back about you. Revenge, that’s what you’re here for. 

With a shaky exhale you turn away from his dresser, your thoughts flitting around your head like annoying gnats. What, who, does he think about when he…? What does he look like? What does his...c- You shake your head, slap your cheeks, trying to center yourself from the images floating around, flustering you and distracting you. 

You’re in the middle of lifting the covers on his bed to peek under it, see if there’s anything there, when you hear the handle on his door jiggle. You freeze, every muscle in your body locked frozen like a deer in headlights as the knob twists, and then catches. Right. You’d picked the lock with one of your hair clips and then made sure to lock it again behind you just in case something like this happened. And by the, “Ugh” on the other side of the door, yep that’s definitely izuku. You’re shoved out of your shocked state, and bolting for his closet door as you hear the jingle of his keys twist in the lock, trying your best to close the door as quietly as possible behind you, it swishing shut barely a second before the door to his dorm opens and you hear him step in. 

Class must have let out early or something, you think huffily, gently rearranging yourself into a comfortable position on a pile of his clothes as he shuffles around his room. You hear the thumb of him dropping his books, the shuffle of his feet, the clutter of him taking off his shoes and the squeak of his mattress as he plops down on it. 

You tuck your knees to your chest and roll your eyes, picking at your leggings as you wonder how long you’ll have to hide before he goes to the bathroom or something so you can leave. It’s fucking stuffy in his closet already, the air hot. Your hand touches the soft fabric beneath you, realizing you’re sitting on one of his hoodies. Its too dark to see which one it is, but you imagine it as your favorite red one. Maybe you’d steal it as compensation for him making you sit and wait in his dumb closet while he probably stared at the ceiling with no thoughts in his dumb brain.

You hear him sigh, loud and dramatic, and then a muffled scream/groan into his pillow. Your lips twitch, he’s such a fucking drama queen. 

Your little smile drops off your face when you hear the sound of his drawer opening.  

Oh god. Oh no. 

Your face feels like there are embers burning under it as you hear the unmistakable sound of clothes being shucked, a zipper and and then flop, and then….a slick wet sound and a sigh of relief. 

Your eyes feel like they are bugging out of your head. Izuku is really about to fuck his fleshlight with you hiding in his closet with him none the wiser. You feel suddenly embarrassed and hot all over, hiding your face in your knees as you hear him let out a moan. A loud one. 

You’re on fire, every part of you. You don’t think you can take this, don’t think you can sit through this and listen to this, think you should just burst out of his closet and use your bravado to somehow flip the situation and make him feel humiliated for getting off in the privacy of his own room, like he’s in the wrong even though you had violated so many boundaries for even being here right now. 

You could do it too, you know. You’re good at twisting things, at powering through the complicated mess of flustered feelings izuku makes you feel and making it his fault, making him back down and cower. You could do it...you’re uncurling your legs and pushing your hands under you in the middle of getting up to do so when- 

“Fuck. ___” Your name. You freeze, for an unholy, goldy second you think you’ve been caught, that he has acquired x-ray vision and has spotted you but no. His voice isn’t surprised or upset its...breathless, airy. He moaned it. 

The first time you hear Izuku moan your name, its with you hiding on the other side of his closet door, your hand clapped over your mouth in shock.

Heat immediately shoots between your legs, your core throbbing unbidden in reflex to the sound, helpless to stop it, to have any other reaction. Your ass plops right back down. You turn slightly towards the door, pressing your side against it, your ear smooshed against the cool wood as you listen, as if drawn under a spell. 

“You’re such…” You hear izuku pant, his voice deeper and more rough then you’ve ever heard it before. “A fucking brat” 

Wet between your legs, seeping through your panties at his words, seemingly ripped out of him. God, he sounds pissed, wrecked. He cursed. You’ve never heard izuku curse before, never, even when you’d pushed him too far. Something really was different about today. 

The slick sounds are more frequent now, steady and...and sounding like real sex you’d heard from porn before. Wet, sloppy, and slapping. Your knees knock together as you lean forward even more. There’s an invisible string pulling, tugging you forward, you want to see…

“Fucking slut” He grunts, and there’s a heavy slap, your breath catching in your fucking throat as you realize that...that must be the clap of his balls hitting the back of his fleshlight everytime he thrusts into it. “Always running your fucking mouth, looking down at me, so mean, you’re so fucking mean to me…uh..” 

The sounds of sex fill the room and you can’t take it anymore, you’re burning, burning, burning, fuck the consequnces. You hesitantly and slowly turn the handle of the closet door, letting it slide open just a crack, enough for you to peek through, to get a glimpse.

His lean muscular back is the first thing you see, he’s facing directly away from his closet, thank god but oh god, that means you see..so much. The flex of his shoulder blades under his tan skin, the smattering of freckles over his shoulder, the long slender slope of his spine as it curves down his broad back, the dimbles at the bottom of his spine, flexing as he fucks his toy. His ass, because of course izuku would have a perfect round bubble butt. There are freckles there too. 

Your eyes skate down, hungry to his large and heavy balls, low hanging and full, currently smacked right up against the base of the little pocket pussy he’s practically straddling on his bed. 

It hits you again than, that deku is imagining that toy is you, he’s imagining fucking you in this position on his bed right now, imagining its your cunt hes pounding into, and your face he’s spitting those filthy words at. 

Your hand is really moving without your permission when it slips under the band of your leggings into your panties, fingers immediately dipping between the slick folds of your pussy, silky and wet. 

“-Wet” Izuku grunts, as you dip a finger just barely inside. “Fuck, i knew you’d be so fucking soft and good inside. Such a bratty girl would have a sweet cunt attached to her, huh?” 

Fuck, where and when did izuku start speaking like this? His soft voice curling around such crude words is making you gush all over your fingers. You wish you could see the kind of face he was making when he said them. 

“Yeah, you like taking my cock don’t you, baby?” He croons and if you close your eyes you can almost imagine he’s speaking directly into your ear, behind you. His thrusts get heavier, rougher, he lifts his leg up on the bed and you see a flash of the little green toy being fucked on his cock, big and angry looking. He’s being so brutal, hammering the thing down on his dick as he hips rut to meet every downward tug. “Milk it. Milk my fucking cock you whore. Wanna- fuck, wanna hear you say my name when you cum, want you to know who’s pouding that little pussy. The loser you fucking hate, yeah? Gonna cum for me?”

Yes, you whimper in your head in answer to him, your fingers curling deep, deep, inside, fucking yourself on them in earnest. He’s so big and you only caught a glimpse, but it was enough. Enough to know he’d fucking cleave you apart if he tried to fit that monster between his legs inside your tight little pussy. But you want it, god you fucking want it. You wanna feel him splitting you open, making you cream around him, making you beg for it. Making you bleed. 

“One of these day” he says, his voice breathless but steady, even as it cracks. You know he’s close. “I’m gonna fucking snap. Im going to make you look me in the fucking eye and apologize for making me want you, and then im going to split that pussy open- fuck, im coming, fuck, fuck, fuck. Do you understand, b-bitch? Gonna fucking make you mine, yeah, take it, take your senpais cock you dirty fucking girl, ah!” 

He slumps forward, hips humping into the toy and balls spasming as he pumps it full of his cum, shuddering deeply with little aborted whimpers. “Good girl, good girl” he pants, trailing off, giving one last little jerk of his hips before stilling. 

You bite your lip so hard you draw blood to stop yourself from whimpering out loud. You pull your sticky fingers out of your cunt and shuffle back into the dark of the closet, curling in on yourself as izuku lays there, panting heavily for a few moments before moving. 

You stay stock still as you hear him get up and shuffle around, his footsteps padding into the bathroom where you hear the door click softly shut. You spring up to your feet and don’t care if you make noise as you dart out of his room and into the hallway, sprinting like a bat out of hell as you make you way to the girls dorms.

You’ll think about how to reevaluate and recoup later. Right now you just really need to get to your bed so you can rut pathetically onto your own fingers and imagine izukus fat dick breaking you open. Never in a million years did you think he had those kinds of feelings for you, and you know it changes the whole game, is a whole other level of playing field where you now know he wants you on a physical level. 

You feel powerless and lie you’re slipping again, don’t know how you’re going to point your finger at him and laugh when you know for every insult you throw his way, is another way hes fucking his toy at night, adding it as another thing to get you back for. If he ever snaps. 

If. you want it to be a when, so bad, not an if. 

You’ll make it a when. You’ll push him off the metaphorical cliff he’s teetering on to make it so. 

. 

[endofthelinegang]

tasm! peter coming in through the window to spend the night just to cuddle and talk after 1 or both of them had a bad day, he gives 10/10 cuddles and is a total lovebug

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ tasm! peter parker x fem! reader

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ uh well almost smut if not a little bit of smut i'm sorry i know that wasn't a part of the request i just got extra creative update this is smut so if you're under 18 DO NOT READ THIS I DONT WANT TO HAVE MY BLOG SHUT DOWN.

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ i feel awful for this boy at every turn bc oh my god why can none of the peter parker's catch a damn break. even the multiverse is fucking mean to them. the trauma anyways enjoy

join the gang!

It was a particularly nice night outside, the wind was blowing creating a nice breeze that came into your room from under the window that was cracked slightly to bring some cold air inside since it was so hot inside. You sat on your bed watching tv and doodling in a notebook ringer on your phone in case Peter or someone in your house needed something knowing that no one was going to get out of bed. That’s when you heard an “ow!” come from the short balcony that came off of your room. Chuckling you put your notebook away properly placing the pencils in the cup on your nightstand. Moving the blanket off your body you put your legs off the side of your bed watching to see who could possibly be saying ow right next to your window.

“Hello Peter.” You whispered yelled as you saw a body tumble up to the window before accidentally kicking it up against the wall breaking the glass and the frame as he rolled out of the window onto the floor.

“Since when did your mom start a little window garden?” Peter took off his mask, shaking his head around running a hand through his hair trying to straighten out his appearance a little even though he was clearly exhausted.

“Oh god what did you do?” You laughed as he rolled around on the floor like a dog before getting up and shaking his foot around that had some dirt on the suit.

“I may have stepped in a pot and then another one before realizing what was sitting there, don’t worry I’ll get her some new ones.” Peter walked over and sat on the edge of the bed with you as you laughed at his little story.

“You gonna help me put in a new window too?” You pointed at the glass that was now all over the floor and the frame was bent up into the wall. Peter let out a breath hanging his head not realizing that he had done that.

“Yes, I’m sorry it’s just been a long day.” Peter threw himself onto the bed, handing you his mask, closing his eyes. You laid down next to him reaching up to your nightstand again to put the mask in your top drawer where it always was when Peter came over so that it didn’t get lost.

“Why? What’s going on?” You turned your heads towards his encouraging him to do the same by taking a hand and touching his face to gently touch his cheek.

“It just feels like everywhere I go I get beat up. I go to work and have to take pictures, usually of myself, and sometimes those aren’t even good enough. It seems like I always pick the wrong one. Or I’m late because I am trying to do Spiderman stuff and take pictures for Peter Parker stuff. Then during the Spiderman stuff I am always getting my ass handed to me before I have any if any success. Like today I sat through and had to pick pictures of myself for an article that was basically calling me a killer. Then on top of that I had to pick through other pictures to add to other articles that no one else is gonna read because I’m on the front page labeled as a possible murderer.” Peter sounded exhausted and really upset by what he had read and even if that wasn’t what he was trying to sound like his face said it all. That blank far off stare his lips folded in turning his face farther into the bed.

“But you don’t kill anyone babe, that’s just bullshit. I’m sorry it;s all taking a toll on you, I hate seeing you all stressed out just remember that you are the people's hero whether the newspaper says it or not. You are always my hero and I think it’s neat you get to take pictures of yourself even though it’s for a bullshit reason. Just remember that you get money for it and that you still get to take pictures. But remember that if you hate doing it you can always quit you’re a smart boy and you’re amazing at everything. You need to take that suit off and get in bed, you look tired.” You sat up grabbing his hand to try and pull him up with you. But he laid down like dead weight.

“Hey I thought you liked the suit?” Peter laid there propping his head up just a little cocking his head to the side.

“I think we both know I like it better off.” You scrunched up your nose smiling at him as he laughed back at you sitting up on his own holding your hand that still held his. Then to try and convince him to take it off even more you took your hands from his placing yours on his chest.

“Alright it’s it’s coming off.” Peter stood up quickly stumbling around almost tripping over objects including the bed all over the room almost throwing himself out the window again.

“Slow down Spiderman, you're gonna hurt yourself. Or you’re gonna wake someone up and have to hide in the closet or under the bed again.” You laughed at him as he hopped around the room, not being quiet in the least.

“Sorry sorry.” He stood with his suit halfway off his chest and upper body fully exposed arms now out with his palms facing you listening closer to make sure he hadn’t woken anyone up that was sleeping in your house.

Peter creeped around hopping in a quiet little circle taking off the bottom of his suit and then began to fold it in order to hide it better just in case someone were to unlock the door in the morning. You pointed to under the bed where it was supposed to go and he hurried up to shove it under the bed. The moment it was under the bed he jumped on top of you holding your waist with one hand the other was keeping himself from crushing you.

“Peter, you need to sleep.” You mumbled against his lips as he continued to kiss you and grab at your waist hand moving down to your thigh.

“Want me to stop?” Peter whispered in your ear as he continued down your neck kissing and biting from your jawline all the way down to your collarbone moving up and down over and over again in a fast pace.

“I-I want. God Parker. You are not helping me say no.” You gasped as Peter grabbed your breast and the bottom of your shirt as he pulled at it to take it off your body.

“Yknow what would make me feel better?” Peter was no longer touching you, just hovering above you looking down with a smile on his face.

“No I don’t. Enlighten me.” Your smile was wide and your tongue was in between your teeth before Peter went to speak he breathed out a lot of air into your neck once more.

His utterances aren't loud enough to be heard outside the confines of the room. You can barely hear them yourself, to be honest. Nobody is going to hear your talk because of the blowing air from the window hole in your wall and the sound coming from your wall-mounted tv. "I'll enlighten you right now. But if-if you don’t want to say no and I will stop.”

You've never had to say no to him, he's never made you feel uneasy, and he always knows what to do and when to do it. Instead, you simply nod and return your gaze to the ground. Peter continues from where he left off. He continued to move fast downward, lifting your shirt off your body, but altered positions so that both of you were totally on the bed. His lips have just barely touched the center of your stomach, and he isn't going to stop until you tell him to. His hands are now at your sides, applying pressure onto your hips on the bed. When Peter slips your panties to the side and his mouth from your stomach to your clit in one motion, it catches you off guard. You take a deep breath and cover your mouth with your hands. He licks a stripe up your pussy again, murmuring as he does so, pausing to delicately tickle your clit with his teeth this time. With his tongue, he soothes over the playful bite, making you squirm. Peter effortlessly hooks both of your legs over his shoulders, his face pushed into your center. He licks every inch of your skin with his tongue. He encircles your clit with his tongue, sucking at the sensitive nub. You have enough confidence in yourself to take one hand away from your mouth and grasp his dark hair, tugging it passionately. You work hard to be quiet, even if all you want to do is call him by his name and tell him how wonderful everything is. When someone knocks on your door, you're so close to letting out a gentle whimper; it's just at the back of your throat, ready to run over your lips and thank Peter.

“Hey, are you okay? You didn’t answer your phone, we heard glass break and texted you but you didn’t respond.” Peter halted at the sound of your fathers voice looking up at you with huge eyes.

“Uhm, yeah no I’m good it was my fault I accidentally knocked my window with my uh phone actually, I went to throw my phone on my bed and over shot.” You took a deep breath in before speaking, your words coming out loudly as you cleared your throat a bit.

“Oh my god do you need help cleaning up the glass?” You could hear your dad leaning on the door as his voice grew.

“N-no I got it all and I just I just,” Peter was motioning toward the bathroom in your room trying to help you find the excuse you were looking for.

“Brushed my teeth?” Even you sounded confused as to why he was pointing towards the bathroom. Peter rolled his eyes, shaking his head violently.

“What?” Your dad whisper yelled outside the door just as confused as you did.

“Shower! I just got out of the shower.” Peter made a motion to say “glad you figured that out”, you smacked your knee against his head.

“Oh okay well tomorrow after I get home from work I’ll go in and make sure it’s all cleaned up. Hey, I meant to talk to you about this earlier but have you read the Daily Bugle today?” Your dad wasn’t about to come in the room after hearing you had been in the shower but he clearly wasn’t done talking. But Peter wasn’t about to make you hear all about that again. Instead Peter's tongue lunges out again, licking at you. Your hold on returns to his hair head thrown back on the bed again.

You take a deep breath, but it's wobbly. You must remind yourself to relax and breathe. With Peter and his amazing tongue between your thighs, both of those things are difficult. "No I haven’t, why?”

Peter's lips encircle your clit , and then one of his hands departs from your hips to join his mouth in between your legs. When your hips buck up off the bed and you squirm, he shoves two fingers into you, chuckling quietly as your father continued to pester you,

“Spiderman killed someone, can you believe that? He might be catching criminals but he is damn close to becoming one. You ever see him around you go in the other direction.”

You have absolutely no idea what he’s talking about, in fact at that moment you had no clue who Spiderman was but you don’t question it knowing that if he was standing outside the door still talking that he found it important. “Yeah, sure I prom-” When Peter sticks his tongue into your hole, you cut yourself off. “Promise,” you finish.

“Okay good, I don’t want you caught in that dumbass kids crossfire.” He sounded serious that time but you didn’t barely hear him, you couldn’t focus on both things at once. For a brief moment, you mistook your father's departure for the end of the conversation. Until he says something such as, "Hey, are you still hanging out with that Parker kid?"

“Y-yes and we don’t hang out, he's my boyfriend has been for a really long time now.” When Peter's name is mentioned, he pauses. His two fingers are still buried deep inside you, and his lips still wrapped around your clit, but he lifts his head enough to look at you and cock an eyebrow up.

“I don’t like him, he seems shifty, kinda strange.” Your father mumbled out not sure what all to say not wanting to upset you at all.

“He’s just shy dad.” Peter chuckles at what you've said. He nibbles at your clit before sucking the sensitive bud again, his tongue flicking out every now and then to tease it. Peter's fingers begin to move again, softly thrusting in and out of you, but it's evident he hasn't fully shut out the discussion.

“Well I could tell that I just, something about him makes me feel off.” Peter sinks his teeth into your clit once more, this time with a little more force, but not enough to injure you. It was enough to make your pelvis buck up into his face. You're keeping yourself quiet by biting firmly on your bottom lip with your teeth. He presses his fingers into you, a sensitive area in your body. Peter uses his free arm to hold you on the bed as you wiggle again.

"Dad, he's a lovely guy. If you’d just talk to him every once in a while-" Peter has now added his tongue to join his two fingers, so you can't continue your sentence.

“All I’m happy about is that he’s a nerdy little bastard so I don’t have to worry about him getting in your pants.” Peter pulls his fingers out of your body until only the tips are visible. Without warning, he rams them back in, his tongue diving into you as well.

You can't stop the moan from coming out. It's quiet, ideally quiet enough to keep what's going on behind the closed door a secret. "Yeah, I know dad," you say, trying to pass it off as a sigh of relief.

“You sound tired, I’m gonna let you go to bed. I’ll look for extra glass in the morning, goodnight.” You could hear your dad's body coming up off the door.

Peter's brow furrows as he locks eyes with you once more. He draws his mouth away from you and licks his lips before smiling brightly, evidently humoured with what you just said. His fingers, on the other hand, are still inside you, crooking up to touch that delicious place time and over. You're on the verge of cumming. The knot in your stomach is ready to untangle. Peter's tongue flicks at your clit as his mouth wraps around it once more. You can hear footsteps outside your door, and while you still need to be quiet, you don't have to be concerned about your father being exactly outside your door. You're cumming minutes later, thanks to Peter's lips on your clit and his fingers going in and out of you. As you achieve your release, you clutch at Peter's hair, murmuring his name. Peter licks his fingers clean as he takes them out. He nods and returns his mouth to your thighs and lapping your pussy clean. He starts kissing your inner thighs once he's satisfied. He leaves a few minor blemishes, but nothing that won't fade away in a few days. He then works his way back up your abdomen, between your chest, and under your neck till he's face to face with you.

“So I’m a nerdy little bastard?” Peter laughed above you as he remembered the part of the conversation that shocked him the most.

“Shut up.” You touched his face with your hands pulling it down to kiss him hard.

“I can’t get in your pants huh?” Peter was moving his head from side to side looking you up and down, making his way forward so that you were positioned with your thighs between his eyes looking down at your naked body.

“Peter shhh cmon, you gonna let me return the favor?” You tried to drive him away from the conversation not wanting to have to go over the conversation.

“Tomorrow morning, not right now we both need sleep, you look like you’re about to pass out.” Peter winked at you before getting up and going to the dresser. “So you brushed your teeth and threw your phone at the window?”

“Okay that first one was your fault, pointing at the bathroom what does that even mean? Secondly if I didn’t say that he would have asked me why I didn’t answer my phone.” You explained to Peter curious as to what he was doing until he pulled out a shirt that was his and threw it in a ball at your direction. Then he opened another drawer.

“Everyone knows that means shower, especially right then. And alright I’ll give you that one but I have no idea as to how you’re gonna explain the pots broken with footprints up the side of the building to your mother.” Peter pulled out a fresh pair of underwear from your drawer throwing them at you as well.

“I’ll just tell her that I got bored I guess because I don’t know what else to say about that one.” You laughed putting on the clothes he had provided for you before he jumped into bed, grabbing the comforter and pulling it over himself, grabbing you and pulling you under as well.

“You’re adorable when you’re half asleep.” You yawned as Peter pulled you onto his chest to rest your head, wrapping his arms around your body.

“So are you Peter Parker, you spending the night?” You jokingly asked him as he kissed your temple.

“Yes of course I am.” Peter snuggled you closer into his body as he reached up to turn off the lamp that was blaring in the two of your eyes. He pulled the blanket even further up your body as he laid his chin on top of your head. Peter continued to kiss your forehead, running his hands up and down your arms. Your back pressed against his bare chest which was incredibly warm, his heartbeat was a pattern against your back which made you even more tired. He was holding your hands in front of your body, the two of you were as close as you could be with clothes between your bodies.

“I love you Parker.” You looked up and kissed his lips lightly.

“I love you too Y/n.” Peter scrunched up his nose and looked forward at the TV as he started to close his eyes and drift off to sleep. Happy he got to talk to you and even more happy that he got to make you happy…

[klitzcore]

hi darling!! i was wondering if i could get some headcanons for dating nick flynn (+ first kiss as a bonus if you’re feeling up to it?) thank you <33

Character: Nick Flynn!

prompt: Nick Flynn relationship HC's + First Kiss!

A/N: love me a toxic man! this one was tough to write, very emotional!

Nick isn't the worst boyfriend, but he also isn't the best. He truly tries a lot of the time but he does slip up.

You'll invite him over to your apartment if he needs to get away from everyone, or if he's afraid he might go out and do something.

He lets you hold him. He doesn't like being weak infront of others, he's always had to be the strong one. But when you hold him in your arms, protecting him from anyone else, like no one has before. Nick feels himself melt into your arms, and more than a couple tears slip out.

You hate how much he gets into fights, but you're always there to patch him up after. Whether its you tilting his head back to properly ice his face, he'll whine and say things like "this fucking hurts!"

Sometimes you'll have to go pick him up at bars, or in other places. You'll throw an arm over his shoulder and drag him to your car. He'll exclaim "no I dont want to leave, take me back!" when you get home. Of course you'll drag him inside, absolutely refusing to let him go back.

In those situations, you make him sleep on the couch. You don't leave him alone, you'll sit on the couch, his head in your lap. You'll help him undress, helping him shed his jacket and flannel, pants. You'll keep his undershirt on, along with his boxers. You cover him with a blanket.

You'll card your hand through his hair, and he'll look up at you. Sometimes he'll gently grab your wrist, just wanting to feel your present.

When he's drunk, the feelings come out in full. He'll spill to you about his past, his current issues and struggles.

Eventually, when you do convince him to get help, it's hard. He hates it, being sober is one of the hardest things sometimes.

But you're with him every step of the way.

He likes indoor dates, as he grows cleaner, he doesn't enjoy the sights of bars. So you two will stay at home, doing things together. Cooking, baking.. all while his music is playing.

He gets frustrated when he writes often. You'll sit across from him, and put your hands over his. Nick will look at you, eyes softening from their previously sour state.

His dad is a very sensitive topic, he doesn't like talking about him. But he does talk about his mother when he needs to, she's his hero.

He gets sarcastic at times and snappy at times, and you're very quick to shut him down.

When you eventually do have an emotional break, it's like a chord snaps inside of you. The two of you will just be laying in bed, and his head will be cradled against your chest, you holding him.

Then, from seemingly nowhere, the tears fall. Silently. You'll start to cry, biting your lip as not to make any noise. You didn't like crying infront of him, you didn't want him to be sad but god it was so hard.

He notices when you inhale quickly, and how you're slightly shaking. He'll back up almost immediately, afraid that if he touched you, you would turn into dust between his hands.

Or that he might make a mistake, like he did last time.

Nick will sit you up, and you'll crawl into his arms, crying into his chest. He'll wrap his arms around you and place his hand on the back of your head, carding his hand through your hair like you'd do for him. He'll take your hand in his and give it comforting squeezes.

When you look at him, eyes red and puffy, his heart breaks. It hurts him so much to see you cry. So he'll do what he thinks is right, physical affection.

He realizes that this will be the first kiss in the relationship, after dating for 3 months.

Nick will bring his face closer to yours, lips almost touching before he says "I was always told by my mom to ask.. can I?"

You'll nod yes gently. Then softly, he places his lips on yours. He'll put a hand on the side of your face, holding you in a fragile way.

After you two part, he looks at you and says "I know I'm a lot.. Sometimes... Not sometimes, a lot of the time. but, I love you. a lot, thank you for taking care of me. Now let me take care of you." before he pulls your head into his chest, laying back down.

[moonlit-imagines]

Headcanons for being Adrian Chase’s partner in crime

Adrian Chase x reader

warnings: death, blood, injury, murder, mention of sex offenders, more murder and death, i think that’s it. oh and guns and knives

a/n: ILY ROWAN U REQUEST JUST FINE I PROMISE!!!!

prompt: @amirahiddleston: “okokokok i would like to request that you write an adrian chase/vigilante (peacemaker tv) headcanon about being his sort of partner in crime? like y/n and him are both vigilante types! thank you & i hope i did this right 😭”

absolute shitshow

obviously the only way you two are willingly working together is if you’re both a little crazy and a little insufferable (but never to each other)

“turn that shit up RIGHT now” -adrian while driving

“SO I’VE GOT MY HANDS UP THEYRE PLAYING MY SONG THE BUTTERFLIES FLY AWAY. NODDING MY HEAD LIKE YEAH. MOVING MY HIPS LIKE YEAH—” -both of you with the windows down

jealous of each other’s weapons

“you didn’t get me one?” -adrian, with a pouty face you could sense through his mask

“dont even think about it, vig. i will shoot you” -you

“not if i shoot you first!” -adrian

drive-thru shenanigans

mcdonalds workers hate you

“just pick something y/v/n! you get the same thing every time, why are you acting like you’re gonna get something different?” -adrian

“shut up, i’m thinking. what are you gonna get?” -you

“the same thing i always get. big mac, no toppings, ketchup and pickles on the side” -adrian

“no fries?” -you

“of course i’m getting fries! and a sprite! like i always do!” -adrian

“hmmm, okay. i think i’ll just get my usual” -you

*20 honking cars behind you*

“fucking finally…can i take your order?” -drive thru employee

only ever seeing his below-the-nose area of his face

“hah! you have a zit on your chin” -you

“you should see my back” -adrian with a mouthful of food

stakeouts

STAKEOUTS

*humming harmonies together*

“that was beautiful, thank you” -adrian

“look at that asshole jaywalking, should we beat him—” *gunshot* “vigilante!” -you

“well he shouldn’t have been breaking the law!” -adrian

he always asks to borrow your weapons

like way too much

like he wants to steal them

“vig, have you seen my rifle?” -you

“what rifle?” -adrian

“the R8” -you

“i have not” -adrian

“right…so if i checked the secret compartment of your trunk i wouldn’t find it?” -you

“you would not” -adrian

“i’ll be right back” -you

“wait no—” -adrian

constantly saving each other’s asses

which ended in stitches or gauze most if the time

“hold the fuck still, dude” -you, trying to cover a wound on his side

“i’m trying! remember that you still need stitches” -adrian

him gossiping about peacemaker

like, a LOT

“dude, i wish peacemaker were here. i bet you’d love him, he’s great” “i miss peacemaker” “peacemaker has the BEST aim” “i bet if peacemaker were here—” -adrian

“do you have a crush on peacemaker?” -you

“psh! what? no!” -adrian

him getting you leftovers from the restaurant he works at

“you gotta carb up, y/v/n. that’s very important in this line of work” -adrian

high fives, fist bumps, hip bumps, chest bumps

“oh, ow, fuck” -adrian

“i bumped your stab wound?” -you

“you bumped my stab wound” -adrian

sometimes getting curious and wanting to see his face

“pleeeease? why cant you show me who you are?” -you

sword fighting

“please don’t cut off my arm” -you

“why would i cut off your arm?” -adrian

“well, maybe not on purpose” -you

“i pinky promise i won’t cut your arm off. now that we’re on the subject, will you please not cut my arms off?” -adrian

“no promises” -you

“no, y/v/n, you have to promise. just say it” -adrian

him occasionally letting you drive his car

“if you speed i will shoot you” -adrian

“then we’ll crash” -you

“i have a good chance of survival” -adrian

keeping tabs on “bad guys”

looking up sex offenders in the area and just straight up murdering them

like you make a game of it

“three points to gryffindor!” -you

“gryffindor? let’s be realistic here” -adrian

“harry potter isn’t realistic” -you

“peacemaker knows all sorts of superheroes and you’re telling me you don’t think harry potter is realistic?” -adrian

“what is your obsession with peacemaker, man?” -you

“he’s a good role model!” -adrian

“isn’t he like, racist or something?” -you

“peacemaker is not racist! how dare you?” -adrian

peacemaker is a sensitive subject

you guys are definitely a pretty efficient team

even if you are just two dumbasses in masks

taglist: @locke-writes // @captainshazamerica // @ravenmoore14 // @randomfandomimagine // @summersimmerus // @bad4amficideas // @xoxobabydolls // @evilcr0ne // @amirahiddleston // @sydknee624 // @thedarkqueenofavalon //

[themrsackerman]

Angel of Paradis

Pairing: Levi Ackerman x Reader

Warnings: Spoilers from Season 4. Mentions of gun violence, blood, death

A/N: Now I know EP8 is only the beginning of the end but goddamn it hurts!! I love potato girl and losing her just tore me to bits. So here, take this. Its my way of coping I guess..

Levi is pissed off. From the start, he disliked the plan but it wasn't like Eren gave you all much of a choice. So the moment the kid got on the airship, he was welcomed with one of the captain's infamous kicks. The cockpit wall quakes with the impact and Hange sighs, shooting you a look. "I think you need to get out there and make sure Levi doesn't kill Eren, Y/n." She says exasperatedly and you nod, rising from your seat next to Onyankopon.

"I'll be right back." You say and she flashes you a knowing grin, shaking her head slightly. Even the commander knows you're the only one who could reign in the Levi Ackerman.

You see Levi on the corner glaring at Eren as he was being tied up. You sigh heavily, seeing Eren steaming as he heals. Jaw probably unhinged from the captain's kick. You sat beside him on the bench and pulled out a handkerchief, wiping his face clean from dirt and blood.

"Y/n-san." He greets you monotonously and you gave him a kind smile. "Hey, kid." You greet back, tucking loose strands of his now long hair behind his ear.

Your heart aches at the sight. He used to have so much fire, had the same will to fight for humanity that you only ever saw in your mentor, Erwin. Now all you see is ember of pure hatred and cold blooded need for revenge. "I'm glad you're okay." You murmur. Eren's blank stare softens for a second and a small smile hints the corner of his mouth. "Glad to see you too, Lieutenant." He says quietly and out of the corner of your eyes, you see Levi roll his eyes and make a disgruntled sound as he turns around.

You walk up to him and placed a hand on his shoulder. Levi meets your gaze with his dull gray ones for a second and sighs, his expression softening too. At this you smile a little and say, "We still have a long battle to fight ahead of us, Captain. Things might not have gone smoothly, but we won today." You remind him and as if proving your point, right on the other side of the ship you hear the soldiers celebrate as they reunite.

"You're right." He agrees. Levi then takes a deep breath and grabs the hand you placed on his shoulder so he can bring it to his face. He turns his head and placed a chaste kiss on your palm. Your heart flutters at the gesture. It isn't grand but was still something you couldn't quite get used to. You two never declared your love for one another, never really had the luxury of time or chance to do so, but small acts like this was enough to let you know that your presence provided him the calm he sorely needs. And that was all you want. Be his peace in this war.

"I'm going to check if the rest of the squad made it back up." You tell him, grazing your thumb on his lower lip and he reluctantly lets you go. "Be back as soon as you can. Meeting will start as soon as this fucking monkey heals enough." He says, cold glare flashing at the other Jaeger who is a pile of steam still laying on the ground. "Okay, I'll just check on Lima's squad. They're the last ones to be picked up supposedly." Levi nods again and watches you leave before turning to talk to Yelena.

You smile past Floch and the other soldiers who are weeping, hugging and making their tributes for those whom had fallen in battle. You then saw three of the soldiers you've grown close with through the years. They were huddled in the corner, sharing a hug.

You hear Jean say in protest, "Dont hug people with that lump ass iron gear on.", while shrugging off Connie's arm. You chuckle at this and tackled him back to the embrace. "Shut the hell up, Jean. I would take Connie's armored hugs any day!" To which the trio whines out, " Lieutenant Y/l/n!!" when you squished them tight.

Although the new gear designed by Hange was in deed not made for hugging, you four relaxed in the uncomfortable embrace. Grounded by the fact that you all made it safe despite the battle you had just gone through. Connie and Sasha smile up at you while Jean tries to still look annoyed, although the softness in his eyes says otherwise.

The soldiers left below start coming in and the cheering just grows even louder. You didn't have the heart to stop them because you yourself are quite happy that today was a success despite some casualties. Now, you have the War Hammer titan as well and were able to destroy the fleet. Now, the Eldians' chance stands higher against this damn war.

"Did you hear that just now?"

Sasha asks out of the blue and you turn to her in wonder. Honestly you couldn't hear anything but the soldiers celebrating. But out of the lot of you, you know Sasha's sense of hearing is far superior than all of you combined. So you take a step back from the crowd and actually looked around.

"Hey, quiet down!!"Jean yells over the chanting but Floch shouts, "Make some noise! Victory!!!" And was echoed by the rest as they embraced and pumped their fists in the air.

"Hey!" Jean tries again only to be pulled by Connie to the side to ask, "Isn't Lobov-san still out there?"

"No, I think he came aboard." Jean says thoughtfully and this was when something didn't sit quite right with you. Commander Lobov is a man that is hard to miss. And with his dedication to this mission to make up for his years being a useless garrison, he would be amongst the soldiers cheering the loudest for the said victory.

Your instincts has never failed you before and its the very reason why you are so good at your job and able to survive this long. But sometimes, you wish that your instincts aren't always right because you always perceive danger. And right now, every fiber of your being is telling you something is fucking wrong.

That if you were to look out the airship right now, you'll probably see the commander lifeless.

Or worse, an enemy may have made its way up to the ship.

Your blood runs cold for a split second before you acted purely out of instinct. You shove Sasha to the side, dreading as you head for the airship's side door and at the exact moment.. someone aboards.

Your gaze met the kid's muddy brown ones. It was determined, filled with fury and you saw that there isn't any trace of hesitation as her finger pulls the trigger. You knew you didn't stand a chance judging by look on her face and her sure aim on your torso. The word of warning you want to let out was caught in your throat as she fires.

You remember seeing those crazed brown eyes and then the ceiling of the airship the next. The sensation of what can only be compared to fire piercing your skin spreads through your chest and insides like molten metal. You hear the indistinct noise of the soldiers' voices grow louder yet muffled at the same time around you.

From happy cheers to manic, hysterical screaming.

You couldn't catch your breath at first and you aren't sure from which. Was it from falling flat on your back? Or was it the searing pain that made tears leak from your eyes?

And then above the chaos, you hear your three closest comrades call your name in unison.

"Lieutenant Y/n, hey!!!" Connie's frantic voice shrill through the limited space of the ship. "Hang in there, hey!" You feel him rattle you, placing his rough calloused hand against your cheek. Jean's panic stricken face comes to your field of vision and you whimper,  "A kid." You gasp. "In the airship."

"Bandages! Now! We need to stop the bleeding!" Jean commands shakily and the rest of the soldiers that aren't capturing the two intruders scramble to get the med kit and the captain.

"Y/n-san, please hold on until we make it to the island!!" Connie pleads but hopelessness crawls his veins as he sees your blood flood the wooden floors.

"Keep him safe." You whisper out to nobody. The captain in mind. Your eye lids grow heavy but you didn't want to close them. No. You can't die. You promised him.

"Don't you dare die on me, Y/l/n." His voice echoes in your mind, compelling you to keep breathing despite how excruciating it feels.

Sasha who was frozen at first, snapped out of her shock as she hears Connie's voice call your name out of sheer panic when your eyes fall close. She then runs to meet the soldier carrying the bandages and was at your side in an instant. With trembling hands, Sasha tries with all her might to wrap you up and stop the bleeding.

"No, no, no, no!!" She starts sobbing while watching the bandage turn red, your gushing blood seeping through no matter how tight she puts the wrap around you. "Y/n-san, no, you can't leave us like this." Sasha hiccups, wiping her tears hastily before grabbing your now cold clammy hand and pressing it to her face. "Please!" She cries, eyes falling close.

If you hadn't pushed her, if you didn't step in her place, it would have been her that got shot. Guilt rakes through her as she watches you desperately fight for your life.

You can feel yourself drifting and you felt helpless. You then meet Sasha's, Jean's and then Connie's gaze, muttering with your remaining strength, "Protect him." And it was no request but an order.

Jean stumbles away, his hands going over his ears, unable to stand your labored breaths and Connie and Sasha's whimpering. Jean felt like hurling when Floch turned the kids to him. The other responsible for you being on the brink of death.

But to those two kids, they are the enemies who wreck havoc to their hometown. Floch wanted to kill them and throw them out but what good would that do? Would taking their lives save yours? And knowing you, who practically treat soldiers like them like your kids even though you were just a few years older than them, you would be disappointed in him at the mere thought of hurting these kids.

Jean can almost hear your angelic voice, "They're just children." You would say. So with a vexed expression and heavy turmoil growing within him, he ties them up and led them to where the captain and commander are.

Jean swallows hard when the captain's cold gaze met his and asks, "Who are these kids?"

By the looks of it, he still does not know.

"They killed Lobov-san and used his gear to come aboard." A lump forms in his throat, suddenly can no longer meet the captain's gaze. "A-and this one here, she.. shot Lieutenant Y/l/n."

Levi's eyes widen. Did he just hear Jean correctly? You? Shot? You were with him just minutes ago. No, how is that possible?-

"Captain, I-I don't think she'll make it." He continues, voice faltering. The grievance in Jean's face make Levi's blood run cold. He stumbles forward a bit as Armin and Mikasa run past him but he seemed frozen in his tracks.

No.

You got hurt but you'll pull through this. You always have. You promised him. And you are one of the toughest people he knows.

Levi tries to convince himself as he glared back at Zeke. He tries to distract himself from the cold fear of losing you with the blinding rage he feels for the Beast Titan wielder. But then, the door swings open again and Levi felt something terribly wrong right away.

And when Connie appears with tears sliding down his face and says,

"Y/n-san.. is dead."

Levi's entire world shifts.

Everyone was shellshocked for a moment. Because how could you be gone just like that? When you were just with them just minutes ago providing comfort to all of them? Passing by and giving them a wave of peace and calmness like the angel that you are.

Hange wobbles, her knees growing weak and its as if someone had punched her in the chest. The pain reminiscent as the day she watched Moblit vanish before her eyes. You were her right hand woman. Her confidant.

Eren's head hung in disbelief. His mind clouded by your kind smile just earlier and telling him you're actually glad to see him. Him. The monster who had just devastated a whole town and killed probably thousands of people. He thought that by now, he'd have gotten used to losing the people around him but losing you is gutting him. Its was like losing family. A sister.

"Connie.. did Y/n-san have any last words?" He asks mindlessly, wanting to know what your last thoughts were. Connie blinks through his tears and his eyes drifts to the captain, whose face was undreadable and knuckles threatening to split open at how tightly his balled fists are clenched.

"She said.. 'Protect him.'" Connie mutters and Levi's facade breaks.

The mob of weeping soldiers parted as the captain staggers to the back of the ship where you lay. Armin and Mikasa were still curled up beside you, their faces red and puffy from wailing. Both of them reluctantly stood up and stepped away as he walks closer. His gaze was still trained on the ground as he puts one foot in front of the other.

He shudders and stop midstep as his foot steps on the crimson stained wood. Before he knows it, he falls on his knees with a thud. Your pale hand comes into his field of vision and he takes a deep shakey breath as he reaches for it. His eyes darts everywhere but your face. The bandage on your middle, the boots on your feet that he had his fair share of shinning as his token of appreciation for you making his morning teas, the emblem of the Wings of Freedom embedded on your breast plate.

Your hand felt cold and stiff against his. A stark contast of the warmth it exuded on his cheek just moments ago.

"Y/n?" He croaks.

Suddenly his breathing shallows as the deafening silence stretches on. He can still smell you but can no longer feel you although you're right fucking there. Levi wanted this to some fucked up nightmare. But then, as he steels his nerves and finally looked at your face, his heart shatters.

Your hair is uncharacteristically dishevelled, e/c eyes lifeless, pupils middilated and your mouth parted ever so slightly.

Levi pulls you in his arms frantically, plethora of would have been and should have been anchoring his heart into a sea of regret.

He should have never let you out the damn door.

He should have held you tighter.

He should have you talked to you longer.

He should have told you.. he loves you.

He never even got to tell you.

Levi's face crumples, face reddening before a resentful yell erupts from him. The soldiers wince at the sound. It was pure agony and it pierces through each and everyone of them, bringing the lot of them back to tears if they ever stopped in the first place.

The entire flight back to Paradis, Levi held you the way he wished he did while you were still with him.

[wh6res]

one more time | markhyuck

"if i'm going to teach you how to fuck her right, you’re gonna need the best seat in the house, markie!" — lhc 

warnings. dubious content, swearing, bondage, voyeurism, masturbation, exhibitionism, mentions of stalking, fingering, oral (f receiving), degradation, there’s a knife (but no knifeplay), a threesome, implied kidnapping 

disclaimer. i dont condone anything. this isnt a normal relationship. this aint love.

note. prolly going to hell for this but who cares. markhyuck for @nakamotocore​ i wuv ya ie please get better soon! TT and dom hyuck for my napaka kalat na mami @donghyukcore​

against all rational thinking, haechan is getting bored from seeing the pathetic five feet distance between you and mark when he comes home. he tries to understand the other male in the relationship. truly, he does, even if he highly doubts that celibate little mark lee can pleasure you the way he can but everything's practically past that line now. donghyuck just wants to have some fun with you two, is that too much to ask for? at this point, he's blatantly ignoring the fact that you and mark don't even like each other.

but haechan cares for mark just as much as he cares about you and he won't just let his best friend miss out on all the fun things he can do to their little doll, right? what kind of a friend would he be? once haechan shoves him into a world of temptation and sin and pleasure, mark would kiss his self-induced celibacy goodbye.

plus, you've been awfully naughty these days.

talks about wanting to come home or getting at least a few rights to have gadgets were the only thing you said whenever you see him. it went as far as practically growling and running away from haechan when he tries to initiate something with you, screeching your lungs out and saying, "don't fucking touch me, you creepy little psycho!"

deflowering mark.

punishing you.

he'd be killing two birds with one stone.

he's fucked your stubborn little self into submission once, but all that overprivileged tv sessions might've put silly little ideas into your dumb little head again. alas, no worries, he'll just have to do it one more time. and maybe, now with the aid of his good 'ol buddy mark, they'll both be able to screw you up so good you'll never want to leave their clutches.

"gumdrop, can you come here for a second?"

haechan isn't deaf to the exaggerated groan you let out from the living room and it grates on his nerves how utterly brave you are for being passive aggressive. you reminded him of a little girl in a temper tantrum because they weren't given any candy - and when you show up in the master bedroom clad in your little pink dress, eyes upturned and sharp, a pathetic little girl was all he can think of when he saw you.

only now did he notice that you had even detangled your hair from the intricate braids haechan spent at least twenty minutes doing earlier this morning. where was mark all this time? why wasn’t he there to stop you? geez, you both are so going to get it, this time!

"what do you want?"

"can you give me a hug? i felt awfully stressed at work today. i need my little gumdrop."

this was obviously a test. don't get him wrong, he'll still punish you but if just this one time you learned to swallow that bitchy attitude and come crawling to him as the perfect lover should, maybe he won't be too harsh.

but he gave you too much credit, he thinks. of course his dumb cockwhore doesn't know shit. of fucking course, you wouldn't know it was a test. not when you scoffed, rolled your eyes at him, and spun in your heels to walk back to the living room.

"beat your meat with your own hands, creep."

haechan's reaction is immediate, his long legs allowing no delay in crossing the room to mercilessly fist your hair. he had pulled your hair so bad you thought it was going to rip right at the roots, all of his pent up anger due to your poor behavior channeling into that one grip.

you feel his scoff of disbelief against the curve of your neck as haechan pulls you flush against his body. "what the fuck did you just say to me?" he laughs patronizingly. "beat my meat with my own hands – aw, baby! that has got to be the best one yet!"

it truly was, though. he's not going to lie. out of every vicious snarl and hate-induced words you said to him, that particular offhand comment takes the cake. seriously, sometimes haechan thinks you're deliberately trying to make him furious – gumdrop, if you wanted to be fucked silly, all you had to do was ask.

he hurls you to the mattress, breath knocking right out of your lungs. before you can even sit back up and crawl away from haechan, he's already crawling over your body to sit directly on your stomach, fiddling with something on the headboard. you nearly scream in frustration, no matter what you do, you just can't throw him off of you!

"i don't know why the fuck you're behaving this way but it's gone too far. one more time. do i need to fuck some respect into you, one more time?”

a new wave of motivation surges through you when you hear the familiar click clacking of metal. your eyes widened just a fraction, the only thing that gave away the unease quickly seeping under your skin. if not for haechan's perceptive eyes, he would have missed it.

he merely used one hand to grip both your wrists in a vice. "no!" you squirmed, tossing and turning and trying with all your might to get him off of you. "no! i don't want that – not the cuffs!"

he loops the respective bands around your wrists with practiced ease. the last handcuffs he used had torn and marked your skin, something haechan wasn't fond of. only he can paint your bare skin with colors.

thus, he bought newer ones. the bands were a bright shade of red, connected to each other using a medium sized chain that loops around one of the steel wires of the bed, and the little bells attached to the bands ring with your every movement.

haechan knows the bells drove you crazy. its incessant ringing driving you up the wall as you couldn't keep your hands still whenever he fucked you to oblivion – he knew how much you loathed the sound of the bells, all the more reason for him to enjoy.

and mark, too. speaking of which…

you stubbornly pull at your bounded hands, glaring at the man before you as he studies your state. the corners of his lips curl up at the sight of you struggling. "you always look so good in red, gumdrop."

before you were given a chance to reply, he stormed out of the room with a sense of purpose bounding his steps. "lee donghyuck!" you screamed. "fucking come back and get me out of these, you pervert!"

he can hear you thrashing in your chains and yelling profanities from a room away. where was the demure girl he turned you into after only a week living in the apartment? though funny enough, the blood in haechan's sadistic side rushes in excitement at the prospect of wiping that glare off your face. it wasn't the fear, nor your submission that gets him off. it was the idea that he can and he will break you down no matter how many times you try to build yourself back up again.

he's not too sure whether he's going to eliminate that dirty mouth you've developed, though. because you did make him snort in the most unattractive way when you told him he can fucking jack himself off when he had been merely asking for a hug. this aggressive side you developed is… nice. he can work with it.

"can you ask your play thing to keep it down?" mark hisses, flinching and making an offkey sound with his guitar when a certain screech from you caught him off-guard.

haechan smiles.

"why don't you shut her up?"

it took a good few minutes trying to talk mark into stepping into the bedroom where he's got you chained to the headboard, but alas, haechan can be persuasive if he wants to be.

frankly, the younger man is sick and tired of hearing both of you bicker – it's no wonder you've developed a sharp tongue! it's all mark's fault and yet it's haechan that has to do the dirty work of setting you straight all over again. you're a tough cookie to crack, someone hauntingly immune to the violence and chaos.

and yet…

"you don't – don't seriously plan on doing this, do you?" your eyes go back and forth between the two males, primarily addressing the younger, devil-spawned male. haechan, ever observant, picks up the light tremor in your voice.

haechan had uttered a playful "if i'm going to teach you how to fuck her right, you're gonna need the best seat in the house, markie!" before forcing the older boy to sit by your side, mark's thighs grazing the temples of your head as your eyes awkwardly flutter up to the spectator.

mark couldn't deny he was intrigued by the emotion reflecting in your orbs. when your eyes met, it was a silent plea, he just knew it was. and unlike vulnerable and helpless you, mark, to some extent, still had at least some sense of freedom to him. he can choose to walk away, to stop haechan from trying to get him laid, maybe even talk the other boy into postponing your punishment.

but he'll do no such thing.

not because he has a moral compass (he doesn't, really) but because mark knew firsthand, there's no stopping haechan once he sets his mind into something – and right now, if that boy wants to punish you and use mark to fulfil his exhibitionistic fantasies then that's what'll happen.

your bottoms were the first to go, haechan's blunt nails digging into your skin as he pulled it down slowly, patronizingly, while watching bemused at your squirming. "this is how you know she needs a reminder," he says, addressing mark. "a good princess should take whatever's given to her like a good girl but if she's being an ungrateful brat –"

you flinch when he harshly smacks your thigh.

"– she gets what’s coming for her, right?"

there's a second's delay with mark's reply. haechan didn't mean for the question to be rhetorical, he wanted an answer from the other boy.

"right, mark?"

"r – right…"

haechan laughs, flipping the skirt of your dress up. "what, are you that excited for pussy that you're stuttering? that's cute."

you hear mark intake a sharp breath when haechan dives in to give you feathery kisses in your inner thigh. he always starts off this way, after figuring out this gets you wet way faster than simply kissing you.

as haechan starts talking, lips lazily grazing over your skin, you fight hard not to utter a single sound as you pull on your chains. "listen carefully, markie. do you hear those whimpers? she likes it," you feel the prickles of his sharp stare. "she's just too much of a fucking brat to admit it. go on gumdrop, your fighting spirit makes this all the more interesting."

you hate the patronizing tone he used as his hands trail higher, and higher until it's pinching at the bud of your clit. and against your whole being trying to keep your lips sealed, alas, it parts and creates a soft whimper that has mark stiffening next to you.

haechan lays his tongue flat against your folds. you weren't in the least bit wet yet to accommodate his size, but that's easy. he merely circles the bud with the tip of his tongue before pushing two fingers in. months of standing in the shadows outside your window had made him memorize the movement of your fingers whenever you pleasured yourself.

he felt the jolts of the bed as you shook your head side to side, trying with everything you can to hold your moans in. a corner of his lips can’t help but curl up. "what, gumdrop? too shy to lose yourself because we have an audience? don't worry our celibate little friend over here seems to like it. go on, give him a show."

too lost in the ministrations of his lips and fingers, you don't see haechan meeting eyes with mark, nodding at an object lying on the bed side table. you can only shudder when the cool tip of a knife presses against the base of your throat, hooking under the collar of your dress as mark slowly rips it off.

but haechan doesn't have the patience. "dude, give that to me. at your phase you'll get her naked tomorrow. let the tip cut her skin, the bitch deserves it anyway."

you scream when he drags it unceremoniously down your front, narrowly missed tearing at your navel. there are a few pricks of pain here and there for when the knife accidentally nicked your skin. he sure was ruthless as can be. why did you even bother acting like a brat, cursed him out, when it gave you no benefits whatsoever? did he unknowingly transform you into this sick little masochist that thrived on his sadism?

"no."

it was a defeated whisper. the last of your resolve turning into dust as the breath escapes your lungs. why did losing feel so heavy in your chest? you don't notice your arms slumping, nor your head nodding off to one side, the weight of your horrible reality sinking into you once again as if you had only been kidnapped yesterday.

but it had not been yesterday. it's been days. weeks. months. and the last time you sneakily got ahold of mark's phone and searched for your name, the last news clip or article published about your disappearance had been three months ago. that only meant one thing.

they weren't looking for you anymore.

just like that the world continued, other people's lives continued. all the while you're stuck here, rotting in the arms of your captors.

haechan's face emerged in front of you. he smiles and you would've believed he felt an ounce of guilt if not for that wicked stare in his eyes. "you've always been most beautiful like this, gumdrop. the hope disappearing in your eyes upon the realization that no one's coming for you anymore – i love it. i love you, my pretty girl."

he placed a chaste kiss on your forehead but he might as well have shot you straight in the heart.

there was no warning, nothing to ready you for the sudden intrusion happening on your bottom half and it was so bad, that it made you shut your eyes, hands wrapping around the chains as tears started falling across your cheeks.

rough fingers reached out and wiped them away.

something felt off.

the fingers were too calloused, opposed to the softness of haechan's nimble fingers. and while the aforementioned male had more length than girth, the person who's thrusting himself inside you is the complete opposite. he's stretching you out too much, not even bothering to give you time to adjust when he's already bucking his hips like an animal.

"shh, it's okay. i'll take care of you…"

this wasn't haechan.

and when you fluttered your eyes open to see mark's boyish little face, you can't help that look of betrayal painting your features. at least you only had to deal with one obsessive, sex-deprived freak. now, you're not so sure if you can handle both of them.

how foolish of you to think that mark's self-induced celibacy stretched far and wide when in reality, he was also just a boy with his own needs. a slave to his own temptations.

how cruel. so, so cruel.

in the back of your mind, you were thankful haechan cared enough to properly get you in the mood or else you would've been staining the bed sheets red by how deep and frantic mark’s thrusts were. it felt like he wanted to tear you in half.

"if i didn't know better i'd say you're experienced, markie! i wouldn't fucking know you're a virgin by how much you're humping her like a dog.”

curse him and his dirty mouth. his constant degradation is making it easier for mark to slide in and out of you, and a proof for that is the lewd slick sounds echoing in the room partnered with the older male's deep grunts – a complete opposite of the pitched, whiny sounds haechan makes.

'gumdrop, come on! be noisy with our first-timer here just how you're always noisy with me, yeah? don't be such a killjoy." the pout in his voice is evident, coming from the side of your ear.

you wish you had never turned your head, otherwise you wouldn't have to see him pumping his own dick in his hands right in front of you. the glare you shot probably looked pathetic, what with all the tears streaming down your face and your little theory proves true when you see his mouth quirk up to the side.

"i fucking hate you."

"mark, fuck her harder, wouldja? until she learns her fucking lesson."

the disturbed stare you gave him does not slip his notice, his hand's pace turning erratic, spurred by the slick sound of your walls, skin clapping, and mark's broken whines.

make him stop, your eyes said. please.

but haechan only shoots you an innocent smile before shaking his head. "didn't you tell me to beat my meat with my own hands?"

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