#like ppl describe the types of pain i can't feel right as really bad so uh no thanks
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eats-the-stars · 2 months ago
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having a medical issue that dulls your ability to feel certain types of pain is only cool in fiction. in real life it just makes it extra hard to tell if you need to go to the doctor right now, or if you can just walk it off.
#messed up my foot and i can't tell if it's something serious or just a 'stay off it as much as you can for a few days' type of issue#like do i go in and risk paying a doctor to just tell me to ice it and chill out#or do i risk leaving it alone but woops! it was actually serious and now i have permanent damage from walking on it all this time#i've got like weird nerve damage/issues that honestly just has doctors going 'huh that's weird'#and it might explain some of my stupidly high pain tolerance (but only certain types)#but it makes it really frustrating once i need to make the 'do i go to the doctor about this?' decision#like some things that would have people shrieking in intense pain are just like 'hmm i feel...a weird tingling. some kind of pressure maybe#but this actually doesn't help me at all because the whole 'Ahhhhh!!!' pain reaction is to get you to STOP the thing#big old 'danger! danger! hit the brakes you are about to incur serious damage! turn back now!'#except my stupid nervous system is the good old 'nah i think it was just the wind' idiot who dies first in the horror movie#but sometimes i'm like 'oh yeah this is definitely weird i should go to the doctor'#and then the doctor is like 'yeah you just twisted your ankle you'll be fine'#so all this does is fuck up my ability to tell how injured i really am#and they don't even know how i got this or if it's genetic or the result of an old injury or whatever#they just ran a bunch of tests and like gauged my response to pain stimulus#and concluded that yeah it's weird but not gonna kill me so bye#it's not like doctors are jumping to make me feel more pain#i'm not aware of anybody going 'hey doc i would like to feel more pain. i feel like i'm not feeling enough of that stuff'#just not a thing u can ask. also at this point i don't really want to feel it?#like ppl describe the types of pain i can't feel right as really bad so uh no thanks
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shallowseeker · 1 year ago
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SHAL YOU NO LIKE ROBBIE?!
TBH, I don't care as much about the writers. (I know--eternal shame. I'm not even a real fan--kill me now etc.) I just...don't remember things. I always have to remind myself who's doing what. I don't know how half of you keep it all straight AND remember episode titles??? And no, nooooo I like Robbie just fine. Love him, even. He’s in my top choices!!!!
I just consider him something of a specialist, maybe? I'm going off vibes, remember. I feel like Robbie is a long-winded, loveable teddy bear. His writing reminds me of comic books, which could be why it feels so fraught and verbose at times, like it's crammed into a speech bubble...? Idk.
I think a lot of his characters are also a bit...it's hard to put my finger on it, exactly. Wholesome? They're so Loveable (TM) and Dorky (TM). I find it stifling sometimes to stomach all the "pluckiness" at once. It even took me awhile to warm up to his characters in The Winchesters. (Don't hit me! Maybe I just have a bad personality.)
I think you'd want him on your team for sure. He did Goodbye Stranger and other wonderful things like Metatron's speech in Don't Call Me Shurley (which was also belabored at times but greatly helped by Curtis Armstrong)! It's a type of energy I find leaning "too meta," and "too mechanistic" at times. The best example I can think of is There's No Place Like Home. I like it in pieces, but as a whole, it seems a little too self-aware sometimes. But not in a fun Ghostfacers way? It's hard to describe.
I...can't imagine Robbie creating an Alastair or a Uriel, or even a Meg...but maybe I'm forgetting something.
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Maybe it's Ben Edlund's intellectual(TM) vibe that makes his Sam and Cas more to my liking? Idk. I feel like, since Sam's the only one still alive, getting Sam right would be key to the whole thing hanging together in a sequel. Anyway, I feel like his work in Reading is Fundamental is legitimately Ecclesiastical because he can be more wry/philosophical/satirical. I'm biased--I like philosophy!
He can do entire standalone narrations which are just as “long” but it doesn’t feel so…templated, somehow? It usually just hits better for me, personally. Sometimes he lurches into being too poetic for my liking, too, especially in season 8. But overall, I dig. Meredith can infuse his stuff with some much-needed warmth. It all makes sense in my head!
I think he's at his best when he's being sarcastic and when the action is so fast-paced he doesn't have much time to get stuck doing word-acrobatics. His good guys are conflicted, and his bad guys are really oily. He lets the characters be mean and surly. He can be as deeply fucked up as Sera Gamble when he wants to be (Repo Man????)
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I can find something I like in most of the writers, even Bucklemming. They have some great devil's advocate lines and political stuff in their scripts, once you comb past the racism, fetishism, and weird pacing.
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I'm not above keeping Sera Gamble in a cage and letting her out to contribute random, unhinged things. Something is deeply, deeply wrong with her, and that translates well to a good dose of fucky-uppy-ness and incredible pain, which I think Robbie can tend to sleep on a little bit. (Dream a Little Dream of Me, Houses of the Holy?? SO GOOD.)
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Others? Bobo does some great stuff, but sometimes I find his back-and-forth dialogue to be a little off? I even think something felt off with Cas's speech in Despair as much as I applaud the effort. Steve Yockey does an excellent Rowena.
Also, I'd let Amanda Tapping direct everything. Just because.
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Mostly, I think they should just hire @angelsdean 🤷  and @jewishtrentcrimm -- I followed them during their live tweeting reactions of The Winchesters and mostly longed for their ideas over what was happening on screen.
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Most importantly, it’d need a shortform writer in the wings whose job it is to take all the long-winded ppl's excellent monstrosities and chop it to bits and couch it in the right voice with the right amount of prickly subterfuge and defensiveness. A vicious, short-form editor who values brevity and would kill me inside...
Also, we’d need an official meta wrangler, because the meta can start to eat itself and really devolve if you're not careful (I think this is Robbie's Achilles' Heel in some of his stuff; it walks the line reeeeeally close for me in "There's No Place Like Home," for example, but I've come around to "Fan Fiction.")
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I am...quite happy to be corrected. Knowing who does what well is NOT my specialty.
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agustdiv1ne · 4 years ago
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thank you + milestone!!
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damn, never thought we'd get here, did we?
in all honesty, it's been a pretty shit year. march 'til now has felt like the same month on repeat with tiny tweaks to make it all so much worse. but i'm not here to complain about the worst parts of this year, i'm here to celebrate the best ones.
this was the year that i finally started writing, that i was finally spurred to open a google doc and just type away until a tiny work of fiction stared back at me. my first one was 1k words, a rant to get all of my emotions off of my chest with an idol as my muse. it felt...great, though it also felt a bit odd writing after being an avid reader for years. i always did prefer essays to creative writing, but this year definitely changed that perspective.
i wrote that first blurb along with another fic in late july, and in early august, i asked my friends if i should post them. om august 3rd, i changed this blog from a fic rec to a fic writing blog just like that. i regret none of it.
it's been nearly five months since i revamped this blog and i couldn't be more grateful for the support i have gotten from all of you, whether it be a kind comment, a like, a reblog, all of it. i never thought anyone would like my content, but i've been proven severely wrong by this community. from my irls that are on here, to my lovely mutuals and followers, to those i've talked to a lil bit on this hellsite, to the writers whose fics i absolutely adore, to those who have left a like or a comment on one of my fics, i want to say thank you from the very bottom of my heart ♡
have a happy and healthy new year! i love and appreciate every single one of you!!
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though i'm painfully bad at writing letters and getting all sappy, i wanted to write them anyways hahaha let's goooo
to @hwaddict:
my irl best friend!! my partner in crime!!!! i love you sm carly, and there are not enough words in this world for me to describe the extent of my love. you have been there for me during my lowest moments, you've seen me cry, and i don't cry in front of many ppl. i trust you with my life and i'm so glad that we became friends back in middle school bc you are one reasons that spur me to keep going. i can't wait to see where life takes us and know that while i might not always be able to be there physically (especially with college right around the corner), i will always be there for you in any way i can be. again i love you and i can't wait to conquer next year with you ♡♡
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to @hopejanaee:
hope!! hobi!!! one of my irls! though we just became friends earlier this year, it feels like we've been friends for ages. it's crazy how close we grew so quickly but i am so grateful to have you in my life. you never fail to make me laugh whenever we're together and you're so chaotic but in such a good way hahaha. you were the one who got me into writing with your own wonderful fics so thank yoi for that. i'm so happy that we became friends because you're so kind and caring and ahhhhhh i love u sm ♡
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to @oikawasmilkbread:
we talked for like 0.2 seconds but you are so kind and hella cool!! it was nice having random conversations with you and i'm so glad you randomly dmed me bc i am shy and i have 0 idea how to start conversations with anyone lmao. i always smile when i see you in my notifs! i hope you have a happy new year!!! ♡
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to @luthenia:
i know you're on hiatus but seeing you in my notifs always excites me hahaha. we never talk but you are so supportive of everyone in this community and i just wanted to shout you out for that! your memes are top tier LMAO and i can't wait for when you come back, happy new year ♡
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to @starsforten:
we also talked for approximately 1 second but it was so fun talking to you about astrology stuff (virgo sun libra rising gang hahahaha) and those teuta matoshi dresses! you are so nice and easy to talk to and i hope your new year is happy and fruitful! ♡
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i recommend every single one of these blogs for their amazing content!! i added some of my favorite fics as i'm a whore for great writing hahaaaa
@kinktae
waterloo — a masterpiece! taehyung is so bitter at the beginning and it's adorable seeing how y/n breaks his tough shell. loved this from beginning to the end ♡
hot rod — the 50s slang, the dynamic between hoseok and y/n...*chef's kiss*
@untaemedqueen
welcome to seoul land — werewolf!namjoon really got me going, 100/10 would recommend
graceful gods — this is one of my all-time favorites, greek god!jungkook has my brain going brrrr
@shadowsremedy + @therealmintedmango
support system — adorable!! this is a hybrid!yoongi fic i really enjoy, and the series isn't over yet! check it out~
@bratkook
tear you apart — demon!taehyung...holy shit. i was speechless
@tatertotthethot
the doms next door — THIS SERIES OMG, i've read each part at least five times already. taekook got me acting UP
scream (posted to @yandere-society) — a really cool take on the movie scream with jungkook, yandere fics don't always appeal to me but this one absolutely did
@ateezmakemeweep
broken — the immense ache i felt in my chest while reading this, but i loved both parts with a burning passion. san is so sweet in this :')
@atinybrew
dirty free for all — the ULTIMATE demon!san fic. the writing is absolutely immaculate and this is the first fic that had me blushing down my mf ARMS
rice milk lattes and bryophytes roads — another san fic admittedly because i'm whipped for san lol. anyways, this was cute and hot at the same time and best friend!yunho made my double biasing ass that much happier
@seacottons
pan — an adorable peter pan!hongjoong fic, it had my heart going achhfhsjfjsjf
sir kiss me — circus au with san holy hell i loved every twist and turn of this
@actuallythatwaspromise
bad romance — one of my favorite yunho fics ever, punk rock!yunho x nerd!reader has my entire heart
aurora garden center and desire ink — florist!mingi had me uwuing for the entire fic, this was adorable and i loved it sm
@yeonjuncore
every single fic on this blog is an absolute masterpiece, i swear
the devil's little angel — THIS IS ONE OF MY ULTIMATE FAVORITES, demon!yeonjun had me screaming and it was just so fun to read and i loved every single second of it so much that i've read it nearly ten times now. so go read it, you won't regret it!
the boy with the horns — another of my ultimate favorites (i told you, their writing is just that amazing), woodland fey!soobin just had me going so soft :(( i literally sobbed at one point, that's how invested i was
bleeding heart — the tension between vampire!yeonjun and vampire slayer!reader had me screeching
curtain call — i have a sad crush vampire!soobin
i love you, always — this felt so..bittersweet? taehyun loves y/n so much, i lowkey cried while reading this
@angelfic
the art of (mis)communication — i am a whore for both reconciliation and yeonjun, 100000/10 pls read this i beg of you
@angelictaehyun
growing pains — ahhh once again a yeonjun fic, my chest hurt a lil bit at some points but it was so sweet!!
@neovisioned
bed of spiderwebs — spiderman!mark has my heart screeching, i loved every second of it ♡
eddie ate dynamite — johnny suh coming for my throat yet again
cupid victorious — cupid!jaehyun :'))) definitely one of my favorites!!
@domjaehyun
quarantine chronicles — ok if you haven't read this or the part two yet then you're missing out big time!! the tension, the buildup, every single part of this fic was just *chef's kiss* but multiply thay by a million
all these years — every single moment of this felt so nostalgic and the ending was so sweet :')
@caiuscassiuss
muse — i keep going back to this one constantly, the angst in this phenomenal and i love artist!taeyong sm here
@neoct-zen
loverboy — HOT, AMAZING, I SCREAMED. the blurbs that accompany this are also top-tier i recommend reading each and every one!!
@moondustis
pink + white — i'm so soft for mark i stg, this was the cutest thing ever
@loviejaehyun
can't avoid this feeling — hockey player!mark is the best thing ever
all tied up — i just- screamed as i read this bc professor!jaehyun is too hot goodbye
@hopejanaee
incapable — this is one of the best yoongi fics i've ever read ngl, it's not completed quite yet but the parts that have been posted are top tier!!
breathless — THIS. I LOVED THIS. yuta is just so hfjshhfhshfnsn and i love this sm
@hwaddict
melting point — big boy mingiiii, 100/10 would recommend
@okayau
house next to mine — frat boy!yeonjun rly got me going, cute and hot at the same time ahhhhbfnsnnf
youth — ADORABLE, yeonjun's confession is peak i love it here
run away — how many yeonjun fics can i fit in this post? (answer: a lot) definitely one of my favorite harry potter aus!! it was awesome seeing how their relationship changed throughout the years and perhaps i teared up a little at the end :'))
@starrychannies
baby steps — ONE OF ALL-TIME MY FAVORITE FICS ON THIS SITE, every single part is so well-written and ahhhhhfhdhhf chan makes me feel some type of way
my stupid — another yeonjun fic! angsty but v cute at the end :')
@baekhvuns
this youth of craziness — 40k words of pure gold, this fic is absolutely one of my favorite san fics ever!!
replacement — prince!ten makes my brain go brrrr, i love how the y/n just speaks her mind here
@masterninjacow
untitled project — i saw soulmate au with mark and i knew would already love it, and i did! pizza boy!mark at that, amazing and i adored it
more amazing blogs!!: @galaxteez, @poutybinz, @lustjoong, @bloominghigh
these are just a few of the fics and blogs i found this year, find more on my fic rec blog @agustdiv1ne-recs!! (my thumbs are starting to hurt i'm so sorry bfjshfhsh)
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wrapping up each month since august since that's when i actually started posting LMAO
☆ august
03: good enough — chan
03: bloodsucker — seonghwa
04: cutie — san
09: veloxrotaphobia — mingi
19: want — changbin
21: numb — yunho
100 follower special — i reached 100 followers towards the end of august, my first ever milestone :') also my first ever time taking requests, 'twas very fun ♡
☆ september
03: on camera — jungkook
☆ october
27: oh, worm? — namjoon
31: demon days — san
☆ november
10: a letter to my love — xiaojun
23: bad for u — jaehyun
27: home sweet home — yeonjun
☆ december
christmas bash 2020 — my brain went hey what if you did this- and i listened so here's 17 holiday fics hahahaa (not all of them are out yet but i'm working on it!!)
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things i plan to release in 2021!!
☆ sunflower — jimin
☆ cross — yeonjun
☆ landslide — seonghwa
☆ nice save — san
☆ red — hyunjin
☆ a secret series (that will be revealed once i plan everything) — ateez
☆ 4 unrelated secret fics oOoOoo — will i reveal them? you'll just have to wait and see ;)
there will definitely be more posted! these are the ones that are going to be my priority at first, but my imagination is always churning so expect a lot more :)) check out all of non-secret wips here!
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i hit 500 followers a couple days ago! i nearly screamed when i saw that LMAO. thank you so much for liking my content because i work hella hard on it :') sometimes i feel like i don't deserve y'all really, but @hwaddict will yell at me if i say that so ig i take it back hfhshhdhg
a post for celebrating this milestone will come as soon as i finish up the rest of my christmas fics!! sorry that i'm so slow :( (hint: my requests will be open, so look out for it!)
so yeah!! that's it, sorry for the painfully long post (i'm sorry to my thumbs for typing this whole thing out </3). thank you to everyone who read this far!! i hope everyone has a happy and healthy new year, and in the words of txt's cover, fuck 2020. may 2021 be a much better year for all of us!!!
much love,
ashlee ♡
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