#like my homedogs

[sleepy-bear-tm]

FUCK I JUST SAW FANART OF BEEL FROM OBEY ME AND I CAN FEEL MY GUILTY PLEASURE CHARACTER COMING BACK ON THE BRAIN

[solazu1]

Brian and Alex omggg!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :33 more creature lore too omg

[high-voltage-rat]

Actually I'm still thinking about it. Another interesting way in which RvB is anti-war is the way that the Director fills the role of a villain and antagonist (especially in the Recollections trilogy, where he's a faceless villain we never see but is responsible for everything that happens).

In his memos to the Chairman, the Director emphasizes his sense of duty and obligation to the military- he becomes irate for the first time when he feels that it's being implied that he was derelict in his duty... or that the work he did out of that duty is being criticized for being against the military's interests. He also talks about Allison's death in a way I find... interesting.

"You see; I never had the chance to serve in battle. Nor did fate provide me the opportunity to sacrifice myself for humanity as it did for so many others in the Great War. Someone extremely dear to me was lost very early in my life. My mind has always plagued me with the question: If the choice had been placed in my hands, could I have saved her? [...] But, given the events of these past few weeks, I feel confident that had I been given the chance, I would have made those sacrifices myself... Had I only the chance."

The idea of sacrifice is central to the way he talks about his wife's loss, to the way he talks about the war in general. He talks of sacrifice with a sense of veneration- that it's something he aspires to do, that he longs for. There's a few ways we can interpret "I would have made those sacrifices myself"...

-That in Allison's place, he thinks he would have laid down his life too.

-That if given the chance, he would have given his life to save hers.

But most interestingly...

-That he would have sacrificed Allison's life for the continued survival of humanity, if that was what duty called for.

...And personally, I think all 3 are true.

In most war media, the Director's perspective on sacrifice is very common. Sacrifice is glorious and heroic- to die in battle is an honour- and it's the only way to ensure the group you serve survives. This is a tool of propaganda- nobody wants to go to war just for the sake of it, you have to give them a reason that the risk of dying or being permanently disabled isn't just acceptable, but desirable. Beyond that, most people don't want to do things they think are immoral- you have to convince them it's important, a necessary lesser evil. You teach them to sacrifice their morals, too.

The way they train soldiers to follow orders and to kill, is to convince them that they, and the people around them, and the people they care about, will all die if they don't. It's drilled into your head from day one. It's the way they ensure their commanding officers won't shy away from sending their men off to die. The message is constant- sacrifice is your duty, and duty ensures your people's survival.

In the Director's eyes, the damage Project Freelancer caused was his sacrifice. He never got the opportunity to sacrifice himself during the war- so he sacrificed others, as military brass do. The Freelancers- including his daughter. The countless sim troopers. Any people he considered "collateral damage" on missions. And when the opportunity to do so presented itself, he sacrificed a copy of himself- Alpha- and he sacrificed a copy of Allison- Tex.

The very thing that derailed his life- the loss of his wife- he made it happen again. He put her copy in dangerous situations, let her exist in the position of constant repeated failure, created the circumstances that would eventually lead to her death. He put their daughter in deadly situations that nearly killed her repeatedly, provided her with impossible expectations leading to self-destructive behaviours in the name of duty, implanted her with two AI knowing they could cause her permanent harm. He was confident he "would have made those sacrifices himself" because he did.

The Director is the embodiment of the military war machine. As an antagonist, he is a warning against buying into the glorification of sacrifice. He's a condemnation of the idea that one should be willing to do anything to win a war- that duty to the military is the thing that ensures survival... All the messages that are pushed to ensure recruitment and obedience of soldiers.

He's a reminder that swallowing the propaganda leads to you doing terrible things... and in the end, you're a broken man left mourning the losses that you suffered even as you repeated them, convinced that it was all necessary.

[starryyskies]

Oh, well, yeah, people don't deserve to be treated this way, I was just letting you know that the old server owner left because they were the one up in your DMs

I gotcha man, I don’t care about discord servers enough to keep track of who’s running what. I know that there’s probably mods that are still in there that are still harassing artists. I ain’t getting into the drama, but I will acknowledge it and be like “bruh are you serious?”

[realpokemon]

so i have a huge crush on my rival but i don't know if i should tell her because i don't know if she'd feel that way about me?? but last time we battled together i beat her with my sylveon and she said "i didn't know something so cute could be so strong" and when i told her sylveon's been training she said "oh, i didn't mean the pokemon" and winked but i don't know if that was like a joke?? also she said once we beat all the gyms she wants to buy me dinner but i also feel like that could have been like a friend thing. what should i do

homedog you are being hit on like no goddamn tomorrow. listen. luvday is in 3 days now which i think is a good enough window to plan in. and i hear battle arena reservations have a discount for rival-couples

[remtutorial]

i thought it would be really stupid and funny if i made homestar and strong bad into furries but here you go i guess!!!! sorry if they're crappy

for homestar it just naturally came to me that he should be a dog because he calls people my dog all the time (but really i just thought. homestar dog. homedog). for strong bad idk it was a gut feeling like i NEEDED him to be a dragon. idk why. but strongbagon is cool

[lastintheserverbox]

But we dont- we don't even know what it-

Maybe it was a sting and it didnt-

...

Okay. Okay okay okay okay, man. I trust ya. You know I always do. You're the man, my homedog, Just... make it home to your boy, and get that situated then. But I'm gonna need to tell Jade eventually. Shits getting WEIRD here dude...

I convinced her to let me help a bit, by the way. I'm not sure to what extent yet, but by God I'll do what I can. Can't stand seeing one person struggling by themself like that, yknow?

- 🦞

[Sam yelped when Lobby mentioned Jade]

"DON'T tell Jade....Don't. Uh. I can handle it on my own, she's so busy-"

[He chuckles nervously]

"Anyways uh...Hey, that's great! You're going to be here sometime to help? Well...Here. not in- out. You know what I mean, man"

[illogicalnordictales]

Quotes. The quoty kind.

Part 25

It is with great disappointment that I inform you of the consequences of my actions. We’re out of orange juice.

I said make me cringe, not give me my 13th reason why.

Hey man, it's blinking yellow. That means I can go, with a grain of salt.

I like how you’re just painting your nails in bed. No thoughts. Just acetone.

Homedog, I think your brake light is having a seizure.

[triangularitydubs]

Say fresh I got a question, but ever fused with ink pomni yet? Also who's your worst enemy to ever met?

1. Ink and I vibe hard. But nah we ain't fused. Not even sure what that means, homedog. Fusin' up like is an anime show

2. Truthfully, that right now would have to be Punk Pomni or Freakshow Jax. Punk be stepping all over my mojo, and Freakshow Jax gives ya girl the heebie jeebies.

[sheliesshattered]

Thank you for the incentive homedog, this one sucked bc i love them both equally :(

This was legit the hardest vote for me in the entire bracket! Thank you for voting Joe Hills and for being interested in my little Scarian wingfic. :D And since you're the first person to send me a screenshot of their vote, I'm going to break my own rule and give you the first two paragraphs of the as-yet-unnamed fic:

Grian woke with a gasp, lurching into a sitting position and choking out Scar’s name even before the reality of the situation caught up with him. He had died. They had died, Grian’s ill-advised stunt with the Warden ending not only his own red life, but Scar’s as well. In the blurry confusion of that first moment after respawn, he scrambled to feel the bond with his soulmate, to pick up any hint of pain or emotion through their link. But where it ought to have been, there was only silence.

Because they had died for a third and final time, Grian was quick to realize, before the growing edge of panic could overwhelm him. They had died for a third time, which meant they were back home, safe on Hermitcraft, where things like soulbonds didn’t exist. Right, of course. Somewhere out there, either at his theme park base or in his giant tree near spawn, Scar was similarly waking up disoriented, as the bloodsoaked haze of the death games faded from their minds like a bad dream.

Wanna read more? Send me a screenshot of your vote for Joe Hills in the @mcytblrsexymen final bracket, and I'll post the next paragraph. Or maybe even two. ;)

[a-dude-named-mom]

Thank you for writing such a BEAUTIFUL fanfic, I really love it, I always get excited with every step forward, this is the best! you're the best!

Also- I like to think that they realize that they are alone and that in part need each other :"> (oh well, so I want to believe-)

I really took a lot of affection AAAAAA (and sorry for bothering with this absurd thing-)

UR VALID, THANK U HOMEDOG IVE NEVER HAD MY WRITING BE CALLED BEAUTIFUL????? HUOURGHGGJ??

[famousautomatondreamsrockstar]

I'm fucked up because I really wanted to have this fantasy dream all star rock and roll band with Alex Turner and Caleb Followill, but then, they did me dirty and fucked all my women and infected them with HIV AIDS, so now I'm pissed off and I don't want to do the band anymore — that's too bad because we were going to be the motherfucking shit.

I'll let y'all off the hook if you do the band promptly and with a good attitude and you pay for the house and the recording studio — then, we don't have beef and I forgive you.

If you do the band like I told you to, I'll still let you have sex with my women because we're homedogs and I've always been big fans of your music, I love your legacy, and it's too good to pass up.

The band is called Drugs, Sex, And Money — it's an all star band with me, the lead singer of Automaton Dreams and the lead singers of Kings Of Leon and The Strokes and Arctic Monkeys and Tame Impala and MGMT.

I know Abel Tesfaye from The Weeknd already trademarked the name Drugs, Sex, And Money, but we're going to get our name back even if we have to get sued and it's gonna be ugly as fuck because I don't like being stolen from — that's a threat if I don't get my name back.

[wittreviews]

Reviewing movies from a time where I wasn’t even an atom in the cosmos yet pt. 3 - Christmas edition

Under review today: we wish you a turtle Christmas from turtle tunes

For anyone who doesn’t know (which is probably most people because this is the most obscure piece of media that I think has even been created), turtle tunes is a Barney-esque television show from the 90’s but with the Ninja Turtles instead of a purple dinosaur. I’ll be leaving a link at the very end of the Christmas episode for anyone willing to watch it. With this being an episode of a television show, I will be doing songs instead of the poster.

Category 1 - the songs

Holy shit, these songs are actually ass. Like if they weren’t in a TMNT related piece of media then I would probably be stabbing my ears out right now. In the first song Leo somehow miraculously turns Jamaica and sing the entire song in a Jamaican accent and there is absolutely no explanation for why. The other songs aren’t much better. The only good song in the entirety of this episode is Raph’s Wrap Rap where Raph raps about wrapping and I think about it way too often.

All in all - ⭐️⭐️ two stars (simply for the wrap rap)

Category 2 - plot

The whole episode is very much Christmas related with the main plot of it being that the boys forgot to get Splinter a Christmas present and they end up getting him so many that homedog can preform his own version of 12 days of Christmas (12 days of turtlemas respectively). Other than that it’s very lackluster.

All in all - ⭐️⭐️ two stars

Category 3 - acting

There is none, and if there is then I just can tell cause it’s kinda bad

All in all - ⭐️ one star

Category 4 - did I like it or not

No, I don’t like it at all. But despite this, I will continue to watch it every year and recommend it to every living person on the planet

All in all - ⭐️ one star

I give this movie a final Witt rating of: what in the actual fuck did I just watch

[rtgame]

Homedog take your painkillers even if it's like. A half dose. They will allow your body to relax which is important for healing. Ik opioids are spooky but they really do have a purpose in encouraging your overall recovery. Hope things get easier for you soon ❤

omg i posted that and then immediately fell asleep for however long lmaooo. my own doctors said it should be a last resort thing but im getting up and taking tylenol rn since i dont think the pain is that bad but thank you for the concern <3

[domithekingoffools]

Unhinged Class Quotes From 10th Grade

The amount of bullshit my class says is baffling, so I have compiled some funny/questionable quotes that I have heard from them

1. My asscheeks are eating my underwear -Makayla

Want me to pick it for you? -Max

2. School shooter vibes, I'm so quirky -Makayla

3. Sometimes I shit so hard I can't stand up -Max

4. You tell Ms.S I made a suicidal gesture and I'll tell your mom you like coochie -Max

5. You know, blorbo from your shows! -Domi

What shows am I watching???- Makayla

6. Serenity duck -Sam

Immediately throws hat violently at Serenity 

7. Pink hair and pronouns? Yeah, well, makayla's black -Unrecorded

8. That's the thing about legs, you can walk with them -Makayla 

9. Benjamin Franklin was a fat president -Elijah

10. Does she have plaques in her house that say breast and nothing else? -Sam

11. Blegh, he looks so ugly. WAIT! That's what we're trying to prevent! -Max

12. I feel like ranboo was a late bloomer-max

What????? -Domi

I feel like ranboo was a late bloomer -Max

Oh I thought you said leaf blower -Domi

13. It's sad bitch autumn -Max

Max, that's called seasonal depression -Domi

14. Skylar baby this candy corn looks like you! -Gracie

Deformed? -Skylar

Yeah! -Gracie

15. Preston, if you don't move, I am going to resize your asshole -Noah

16. Preciate it homedog -Nathan

17. Eyghhagh -Gracie

Youunghna -Elijah

Eeeeua-gracie

Aaafughhaeu -Elijah

*grudge noises* -Gracie

18. You've gained 200 pounds since the last time I saw you! -Austin

I didn't weigh 50 pounds when you left -Noah

19. At least I have a soul you ginger -Newton

20. My sister's hot as hell tho -Gracie

21. Back when I was skinny -Noah

YOU WERE SKINNY??? -Coach C

22. Because of the hookers -Serenity

23. I don't have xbox anymore! -Brody

I know! -Nathan

Dawson traded that bitch for a shotgun! -Brody

24. I didn't know that the boys who were gay in highschool had sex with other guys -Jayla

25. Think racist thoughts -Nathan

26. It's 9:11 make a wish -Unrecorded

27. I know that but the state of alabama says she can -Nathan

28. Sometimes I think we're the smart class, then jayla opens her mouth -Domi

29. I don't know what we were drawing, but all the sudden it became really buff -Domi

30. Imagine Adrian's hair as a loofa… something soft touching my balls… -Unrecorded 

31. Ms.H said she gonna put y'all in concentration camps if y'all don't sit down -Noah

32. Brody just declared independence and crushed everyone. HE WAS AMERICA -Unrecorded

33. Blegh I forgot pepsi tasted like that-serenity

Like what? -Makayla

Like pepsi -Serenity

34. No shove your fist in his mouth and grab his tongue -Adrian

35. What facts will you go with reeses and snickers, which will make you fatter? -Serentiy

36. This is like the ideologies of white girls nowadays -Nathan

37. The walk of sadness -Max

You mean the trail of tears??? -Makayla

38. Imma do shrooms cause they come from the earth! -John

39. If you can do it (one leg burpees) at 250(lbs), you can do them at 160! -Coach C

Noah's been doing them at- -Nathan

Noah, how much you weigh? -Coach C

About the same as you 250, 260 -Noah

I need to lose weight -Coach C

40. Just because I forgot the principle is dead doesn't mean anything -Makayla

41. You don't have boobies, you have mommy milkers -Makayla

42. I didn't know your cooch elongates -Makayla

43. I clearly won -Serenity, drawing a curved line

No, clearly I got 69 -Newton, drawings a 69

No, clearly I got 69 -Serenity, drawing a 69 over the previous one

Clearly I won I got 420 -Newton, drawing a 420

No I won I got 9/11 -Serenity

44. Whenever I drink monster, I play tetris like a god -Makayla

45. Context: uno, the most recent played card was a green 9

Max plays a green 6

It's not a 9! -Domi

Max takes it back

The card was green! -Serenity 

Max plays the card again

46. I need to lubricate my throat! -Makayla

47. I still need to use my Ls! -Max

Max your whole life is an L! -Domi

48. *Demon Voice™️* NO! NO! *Kiss* NO! GET OFF THE BED! NO! -Max

49. Oh, that? That's old steak mouth over there, you don't want to kiss him you'll get diabetes -Max

50. The children yearn for the mines Ms.S! -John

51. You wanna lick my stick? -Serenity 

Not really -Max

52. My mom didn't do drugs, she ate salami -Serenity 

53. I know you felt the rizz -Makayla

54. I rizzed you up too hard -Makayla

55. Bears have their tiddies out 24/7 -Makayla 

56. If I'm not being ravaged, I'm ravaging, you can't change my mind -Serenity

57. Fingers are fingers, unless you're missing one cause I'm not licking a stub -Serenity 

58. He's not girly pop, he's woman soda -Max

59. For the sake our beans, we can lie -Max

60. You're not wrong but the context is horrible -Makayla 

61. Together we form… MEGA FAGGOT -Makayla 

62. I can feel the wind on my left asscheek without you -Newton

63. It's a confusing math, but it's a math -Makayla 

64. Why is he shooting staples in his drink? -Nathan

I'm killing the bacteria in it -Landon

65. Was she a female? I just put she was female and caring -Unrecorded 

66. But I DO know, I've seen you naked -Serenity 

67. Somebody could hand landon green lint and he'd smoke it -Noah

68. I'm sorry you suck at minecraft, but it's probably because you're a helmet kid -Serenity 

69. You know your disability? You're white -Serenity 

70. White power -Landon

71. My body, my choice. Now put your own damn computer up -Max

72. That'd be pretty funny if we all got cancer -Jayla

73. Ava's gonna sit there and cry until she turns white -Landon

74. I want to put a finger in her cleavage -Serenity 

75. He aged like milk, nice and chunky -Serenity 

76. Oh my god you decapitated him! -Ej

That's why he needs CPR! -Ms.S

77. You're as mexican as I am black -Caycee

78. *puts a book that says atlas on Serenity's desk* Y'all want this? -Coach C

Atlantis? -Serenity 

79. Yeah… the kids sitting on the floor are the ones in honors -Cooper

80. The only thing I know in spanish is something racist -Nathan

81. I'm surprised Landon don't got extra small shorts to accentuate his… nevermind -Nathan

82. It's torn in both holes! -Serenity 

83. I don't care if his chin is 2 feet long, I love him -Max

84. Red, white, and blue baby, like your mom's coochie -Serenity 

85. Yeah, you'll just add another inch to that forehead -Serenity 

86. Makayla is dripping with moisture -Max

87. No, no, a 60 will still bring my grade up, so will a 67 -Landon

88. Is there any topic we can talk about that isn't Nyleah's life? -Ms.S

My grandma's casket! -Landon

89. Because I look terrible -Gracie

That's everyday honey -Ms.A

90. You can admit it if you read Danny Phantom mpreg -Max

91. Noah has a history of breaking seating arrangements in my classroom -Ms.M

It was one time! -Noah

92. Aren't we so pretty! I'm so white… -Ms.M

93. Sexually harassing someone is not rizz -Serenity

94. You know Noah got scared cause he started rubbing his stomach-Nathan

95. I don't think dollar taco monday ever existed -Nathan

96. I HAVE TESTOSTERONE!!! I'M A MAN!!! -Serenity 

97. No strawberry, drink your black milk like an sjw -Max

98. When I read fanfics I read angst, smut, and no comfort -Max

That's because you are a broken, broken man -Domi

99. You're going to be the Elvis of burping -Makayla

100. Makayla is dripping with moisture -Max

101. Just a little sprinkle of tism -Titus

102. Are you a god? -Serenity 

No, I'm a whore -Domi

103. She turned that chair into a furry -Domi

104. If I don't get my daily 2 hours of staring into the abyss, I'll break out in hives and… shit bullets or something, I don't know -Max

105. If someone gets scarred for life, that's their problem -Domi

106. You have jiggle physics -Makayla 

107. I'M A WOMAN! CAW CAW! -Serenity 

108. I'm sorry but I can't condone that, let's talk about something else -Sam

109. He's so ugly, I'd gag every time he wants to go down on me -Max

110. You can sip coffee on my lap -Makayla 

Only if I can drink it out of your mouth -Max

111. I don't think they're real cheese either, BUT AS AN AMERICAN -Max

112. Mount me like a deer -Makayla 

113. As a vagina person, I shouldn't have to work -Max

114. I poisoned his cup noodles -Max

In a bit (soon hopefully) I'll post stats (who had the most quotes in a teir list) and a top ten most cursed quotes!

[fighterjetfucker3000]

i should be asleep because it’s 1 AM but i am feeling things. things that are vibrant, like if pastel colors suddenly turned to vomit-inducing bright neon hues. maybe it’s because i forgot to take my meds 2 nights in a row (those antidepressants sure can stifle some emotions)

alright i think it’s time to make an even worse decision and stay up later and let the writer in me break free from his cage and control my limbs and brain so i can type endlessly

EDIT: (note to self) maybe also remember to take your meds??????????? homedog what the fuck man please take care of your body ???