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johaerys-writes · 3 years ago

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Writing Tag Game

I was tagged by @noire-pandora @midnightprelude @mogwaei @serial-chillr @faerieavalon @pinkfadespirit @inquisitoracorn and @in-arlathan thank you so much! :)

How many works do you have on Ao3?

On my main Ao3 blog: 23! I also have a second blog where I post works set in the Dragon Age-inspired Modern AU I've been writing with @oftachancer , featuring my OC Tristan Trevelyan and her OC Aran Trevelyan, as well as a few others of our OCs. There are 5 works there at the moment. You can check them out here: jo_writes

What's your total Ao3 wordcount?

On my main blog, 516,722 words. On my second blog, 193,953 words, but the majority of it is co-written with @oftachancer .

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

High-Flying Birds: 589 kudos (TSOA)

Where Blood Roses Bloom: 467 kudos (Castlevania)

Winter's Fruit: 424 kudos (TSOA)

Like Friends Do: 410 kudos (TSOA)

Memories and Echoes: 327 kudos (TSOA)

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Always!! I don't think there's a single comment I've ever received that I've left unanswered. I just love talking with my readers and screeching in my replies. I often wonder whether I come across as a tiny bit insane or overly enthusiastic, but you know what? I am both, so who cares 😂 I just appreciate every single person that has taken the time to read and comment on my works, and I want to make sure they know JUST HOW MUCH

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

I honestly don't think that many of my stories have an angsty ending? Most of them end on a hopeful or at least bittersweet note, I think. I'm pretty sure the only ones I've written that have sad endings were those in my Hector/Carmilla series, You Always Hurt The Ones You Love (CV) which were kind of dark and depressing anyway.

Playground Love, the fic I've written with @oftachancer featuring our OCs Tristan and Aran ends on an angsty note, but things do get better in the next installment, Never Let Me Go, so I suppose I am a little allergic to angsty endings XD

What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending?

The Stars Will Guide Us Home (TSOA, Modern AU) has a super soft and fluffy ending, and Fall Into Your Tide (TSOA, Merman AU) will have a happy ending too.

Do you write crossovers? If so, what is the craziest one you've written?

I've written a Witcher/Dragon Age crossover, Viper In Tall Grass, where Tristan is a witcher and Dorian a Nilfgardian mage which I thoroughly enjoyed! Also, one of the first long fics I ever finished was a Witcher/Wheel of Time crossover, which I think is genuinely the most... imaginative thing I've written 😂 I never posted it and don't think I will, but I still love it to bits and I'm super proud of myself for writing it.

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Kind of? It wasn't directed at me personally (I don't think) but at one of the main characters of the fic. Perhaps it was referring to the way I'd written the particular character, I truly can't say, it was a little vague. It takes a lot to offend me, but this really rubbed me the wrong way. I honestly think I would have been less offended if the person had criticised my writing rather than the character lol. I just don't take any shit when it comes to the characters I love. They're PERFECT, okay? How dare you come into my house and badmouth them 😂 RUDE

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Hell YEAH! I love writing smut, it's great. As to what kind, I think that porn with feelings describes it really well. The smut I write tends to get emotional real quick, even when I intended for it to be straight up porn, so I guess there's no hope for me, hah.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes, High-Flying Birds has been translated into Vietnamese.

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes!! With oftachancer, two novel-length fics (Playground Love and Never Let Me Go), as well as a few other WIPs that haven't been posted yet, and I'm currently working on a multi-chap fic with my friendo @in-arlathan , featuring Dorian/Tristan and Solas with her Elenara Lavellan, which I'm so excited about! I've also brainstormed and goblined-out over a couple projects with @mogwaei !! I love co-writing, it's so fun :)

What's your all time favourite ship?

Oooh, that's a tough one. I'm super biased in that the ships I love are those I write (both canon and OC pairings) but if you held a gun to my head and asked me to choose I would probably have to say... Dorian/Tristan and Achilles/Patroclus? AAH this is too hard ;w;

What's a WIP you want to finish but don't think you ever will?

I do plan on finishing all of the WIPs I am currently working on. I have a lot of writing ideas that I don't think I'll ever get around to, but when I actually start writing something I tend to commit till the end.

What are your writing strengths?

Descriptions, introspection and angsty/emotional scenes I think are my favourite things to write. I also enjoy writing fight scenes a little too much (and judging by the feedback I receive on them people seem to enjoy them too, heh). Lastly, I've been told that the characters I write are complex and fleshed out and that my pacing is good, and that's honestly the best praise for me.

What are you writing weaknesses?

I struggle quite a lot with self doubt and perfectionism. I worry a lot about how my work will be perceived and whether it's good enough. I often agonise over small details or paragraphs/sentences, to the point where I sometimes post just so I stop myself from going back and editing indefinitely. I have thousands upon thousands of words in deleted scenes because "they weren't quite right" or I changed a tiny bit and the rest didn't fit. So. You get the idea 😅 (Now, how I manage to read through everything multiple times before posting yet still get typos... welp)

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

Hmm, I have to say that I do like it when there are foreign words interspersed through the narrative if the story isn't set in an English speaking world or if the characters speak a different language, but I'm not a huuuge fan of seeing a big chunk of dialogue in a foreign language without immediate translation or a hovering text. It kind of breaks the immersion for me and I tend to avoid it generally in my own writing.

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Dragon Age, and specifically DAI! That game never gets old for me.

What's your favourite fic you've written?

It's impossible for me to pick just one so I'm going to cheat and choose a few. I absolutely love my current WIPs: High-Flying Birds, Where Blood Roses Bloom and A World With You, and the freaking epic-length fics I've written with @oftachancer . They haven't always been easy to write (especially AWWY, which has the most intricate plot & character development) but I'm so proud of them and I've learned so much while writing them. Of my finished stories, The Stars Will Guide Us Home is hands down one of my all time faves. It had been on my mind for several months before I actually wrote it, and I poured so much of my heart into it. I still get emotional when I go back to reread it, not gonna lie! Lastly, At The Water's Edge (TSOA) is very dear to me and I often go back for rereads.

I'm tagging forth to (no pressure!): @fancytrinkets @elveny @glimmerofgold @asiriushoe @juliafied @boshtet-juggler @schattengerissen @dafan7711 @tessa1972 @fandomn00blr @pikapeppa and anyone else who would like to join!

#tag game #writing #dragon age #castlevania #the song of achilles #tsoa #johaerys writes

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dystovian · 4 years ago

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Bucky Prompt Idea: Set in infinity war, the reader has spent the past few years in Wakanda with Bucky, helping him recover from the events of Civil War. To be more useful to the community, she teaches younger children in the village about the outside world. Bucky stumbles upon one of her lessons one day and is in complete awe of how precious she is & how she makes his heart soar. During the battle, maybe reader and Bucky fight alongside one another and flirt while kicking ass? Just some much needed wholesome Bucky fluff (and maybe some angst if you want, with the snap causing him (or her) to vanish?) thank you! ❤️

The Beauty in Life

Summary: in which not all good things last.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes/Reader

A/N: THANK U SM FOR THE LOVE ON MY PREVIOUS FIC I LOVE YOU ALL!!!!! and, will buck get a break ever? no, likely not! will he get one in tfatws....probably...not. :) i’m in pain! 😃. also, sorry buck and the reader didn’t have much talking time, i didn’t want to put too much dialogue!

Healing. It’s what you were built for, what you were trained for. Taking people who have fallen apart, and intricately piecing them back together similar to that of a puzzle. It was difficult, yes, but you always managed.

James Buchanan Barnes was the most confusing puzzle you have come across, in all of your years of torture among Hydra’s walls, not once had you come across someone with so many missing pieces. One or two, yes, that was normal. But it seemed as if a vacuum came by and occasionally sucked up a fallen one, leading you straight back to square one during a session with him.

It wasn’t until his residence at Wakanda that you realized that all along you weren’t missing any pieces, they weren’t lost in the deep hole of a cleaning device, or a black hole. But simply lost under the rug, in hiding. When he lost his arm, yes, again, a weight lifted off his back as if he had been carrying the entire planet.

Caring for Bucky in Wakanda didn’t satisfy your thoughts. You felt like you were holding T’Challa and his people back, simply resting during the night, waking for Bucky and Bucky only. That quickly changed when Shuri ushered you to her one day, asking that you act as a substitute teacher for a history class due to the passing of their former teacher. You said yes, you wouldn’t pass up on the chance to fill a purposeful role.

Bucky’s favorite thing to do to pass the time besides caring for livestock, or watching the clouds, was undoubtedly joining your class. He loved when the children asked him questions, albeit most of them were a bit too personal, but he always answered as many as he could. The students, and you, never minded his presence, and had no issues if he got overwhelmed and had to exit the room.

“Overwhelming children, aren’t they?” T’Challa chuckled, a hand reaching to squeeze the Super Soldiers shoulder from behind, a kind but reassuring smile upon his lips.

“Yeah, it’s kind of a little scary. But it’s fun coming to visit them, they’re always eager to learn something, even if it’s a distraction.” He smiled, looking at his feet. Truth be told, he didn’t initially start coming to see the children. It was you that had offered a seat for him, welcoming him with open arms every single visit, with a lovely smile on your face. And, wow, the passion you put into teaching the children was unmatched, he admired you, he really did. Always eager to help, teach, and heal others.

“Yes, always eager. Just as you are to see Y/N. Am I correct?” The Wakandan King commented, watching as you used your ability to calm a child down after breaking their pencil, eyes and hands gentle yet swift to repair their emotions. Bucky spluttered, blinking once or twice as if he was caught with his hand in the cookie jar. I mean, he wasn’t wrong, but poor Buck didn’t think he was that obvious when it came to his excitement to see you.

“Don’t worry, I’ll keep it to mysel-“

“My King, your presence is called for.” Someone called from feet away, interrupting the two, T’Challa nodded before turning to Bucky and smiling, only to walk away with another at his side. Bucky turned back to the window that looked on into your classroom, and while standing in that hallway he realized that maybe he should tell you about his admiration for you, as it’s not everyday that good things last.

But Bucky was right, nothing good ever lasted. Two days later, as Bucky tended to his goats, soldiers approached, and without a word he understood. Perhaps, one day, he could live peacefully, perhaps with his best friend, or even you by his side. But today wasn’t that day, today he had to fight.

Things escalated rather quickly, and before he knew it he was battling aliens on rolling fields with you just nearby, and a...raccoon? Almost as if by muscle memory, he barreled into the enemies with his weapon, and you tore them apart from the inside out.

“I like the arm, Bucks! Looks good on you, I’d try and keep this one, though.” You shouted through the chaos, momentarily creating what seemed like an invisible shield around the two of you in order to regain your composure. This was overwhelming, but nothing would stop you from checking in on Bucky.

“Thanks, Doll. And you should keep that haircut, you look great!” He laughed, shaking his flesh arm of a cramp. And of course, your shield dropped, and you went right back to it, fighting the bad guys, something you’ve done for years.

Soon, it was silent, birds flying away from the trees in flurries as they danced against the skyline, the grass beneath you tickling your ankles due to the breeze. Something was wrong, so terribly wrong, by the gods you didn’t want this, you wanted peace, you wanted to wake up everyday to the birds outside your window singing wonderful songs, you wanted to hum along to radio doing the dishes. You wanted a life with him, with Buck.

You kept yourself together using your ability, using your experience in keeping those puzzle pieces together for so long, doing anything to reach Bucky in time, stumbling over tree limbs, over rocks and even pebbles. By the time you reached each other, it was too late. Before the tips of your fingers could even touch, you had both fallen to the ground in a flurry of ash, confessions lost to the whispers and howls of the wind. And promises of a new life washed away by a surge of power.

#bucky x reader #marvel x reader #bucky barnes x reader #😎 please enjoy!

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hotoffthepressfics · 5 years ago

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Teach Me How to Dance with You

MASTERLIST

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

Word Count: 4,832

Summary: After a botched mission the Reader tries to get closer to Bucky, but can she get passed his trauma and get close to the man underneath?

Warnings: Injury and violence, angst, fluff

Chapter Soundtrack:

“How ‘Bout a Dance?” - Laura Osnes

“Teach Me How to Dance With You” - Causes

“Try a Little Tenderness” - Frank Sinatra

A/N: Hands down, my favorite fic I’ve ever written. I hope you all enjoy this super fluffy piece. 💕

Distant rumbling shakes the destroyed building. Small clumps of concrete drop like hail. The heavy slab of wall shifts lower, putting more pressure on your pinned leg. You groan in pain; your brain scrambling to figure a way out. You had tried to contact the others, but your comm had been damaged in the explosion.

The mission was supposed to be straightforward. Clear out the Hydra cell, take back any intel gathered. Except that someone had been ready for you.

The ground shakes again as more aftershocks roll through the vicinity. The wall moves another inch lower. You scream this time, the pain becoming unbearable. You wonder briefly if this is where you’ll die when you hear someone shouting. You crane your neck to see who’s coming. A dark figure cautiously creeps through the dust and smoke, body in a battle ready stance.

“I’m – here! Please, help me!” Your voice grates against your throat, coughing as you inhale to speak.

The figure zeroes in on you, quickly approaching. It dawns on you that perhaps this wouldn’t be an ally, but an enemy. If it was an enemy then at least this pain would be over soon.

Relief floods your veins as soon as a certain super soldier’s features come into view. His eyes widen in recognition and he drops to your side.

“Y/N! Can you move?” Bucky asks, assessing your predicament.

You shake your head.

“No, my leg’s pinned. The wall fell as soon as the chaos started and I wasn’t fast enough to move out of the way.” You answer a bit ruefully.

You’re suddenly aware that the pain in your leg has subsided. In fact, all sensation of feeling is muted as you attempt to wiggle your toes. You fight the rising panic.

“I’m gonna lift this up and you need to move out from under it. You got that?” Bucky instructs.

You nod and brace your hands against the floor. Bucky positions his hands underneath the rubble and lifts, his metal arm whirring with the force needed to move the heavy object. As soon as it’s high enough you pull and kick with your good leg until you’ve slid clear of the debris. Bucky drops the slab to the floor.

It was like someone had dropped hundreds of fire ants down your leg, the sudden rush of blood tripling the dulled pain. You hold your breath, trying not to scream. Small black dot swim in your vision. You’re dimly aware of someone speaking, the agony making it hard to focus on anything else.

Without warning you feel yourself become weightless as two arms lock beneath your back and knees. The jostling movements as Bucky carries you quickly from the scene renew the pain in waves. You whimper pathetically and beg him to stop.

“I’m sorry Y/N. I know it hurts, but we have to get you out of here. I promise, when this mess is over I’ll do whatever you ask, doll.”

You whimper again but nod and press your face into his shoulder, the coolness of the Vibranium soothing on your fevered cheek. You hear Bucky speak again.

“I’ve got Agent Y/L/N. She’s injured pretty bad. We’ll rendezvous at the quinjet.”

Steve responds though you don’t catch it. Bucky moves quickly, taking care not to jostle you too much. You attempt to keep your whimpers and groans to a minimum, though the trek to the jet feels like an eternity. As you two come up to it Steve careens around a corner and ushers you in.

Bucky sets you onto a seat and begins strapping you in as Nat, Sam, and the rest of the team barrel into the jet. Steve walks over to you. He kneels to inspect your wound, gingerly lifting the torn cloth and prodding the flesh beneath.

“What happened?” He asks you, his piercing blues staring up at you.

“Explosion… concrete wall…boom.” You weakly mimic the slab falling down with your arm. Your head lulls to the side. “Couldn’t move.”

Steve hums in understanding and resumes his examination. He nods once.

“The good thing is the skin isn’t broken, but you could be bleeding internally. Not to mention that the bone might be broken. Fractured at the least.” He says, a little relieved though still a bit grim.

Now that eminent danger was diverted the adrenaline was wearing off. Your eyes feel heavy and you struggle to keep them open. They drift close and Steve digs his thumb into your wounded leg. You yelp and yank away from his grasp, eyes snapping open to glare at him. He grins repentantly.

“Sorry Y/N, but we need to you stay awake until we can get you properly checked.”

“Well then, stop probing my poor leg and get this thing in the air already!” You whine, a little too petulant. You were hurt; you were allowed to be a little childish.

He leaves you be and begins giving commands to head back to the tower. Bucky takes the seat to your left and straps himself in. You incline your head towards him, trying to focus on his movements to stay awake. When he’s finished he rests his hand against his thigh, waiting for lift off.

You study his hand for a moment. On instinct you reach for it. Bucky pulls back the second your fingers make contact with his skin, but then he turns his hand over and laces his fingers with yours.

Silence passes between you two for a beat, then you mumble, “Dancing.”

Bucky cocks his head towards you, one eyebrow quirked. “What?”

“You said… you would do.. anything I asked. I want… you to.. dance with me.” You pant, the effort to remain conscious taking its toll.

He smirks and narrows his eyes at you, “Any particular reason for that request?”

You clumsily shake your head, eyes dropping closed. A sharp pain spreads over your cheek. You crack open your left eye and scowl. Bucky’s smirk widens and releases his hold on your pinched cheek.

“Alright, it’s a deal.”

•••

Recovering from you injury was a bitch. The silver lining had been that, thanks to Tony’s fancy, high – tech machines, you’d be able to walk again. The dark cloud had been the endless, and oh did you mean endless, weeks of healing and physical therapy.

A super soldier with incredible healing abilities you were not. Damn them.

No matter the struggle, you’d been determined to make a fast recovery. Tony Stark’s annual Avengers Gala has been two months away. Normally that wouldn’t interest you much, but this time was different. This time you had the procured promise from one Winter Soldier for a dance.

You recall the night you’d found a somber Rogers nursing a glass of whiskey, though it didn’t do much for him. You’d sat and listened to him reminisce about the good ol’ days. He told you how Bucky would try to set him up on dates and force him to go dancing. Steve bragged about how light on his feet Bucky used to be. He could sweep any dame he wanted off onto the dance floor and she’d be his. However, once he’d come back he never indulged in such things anymore. He figured Bucky felt he didn’t have a right to, after all the damage he’d caused.

It made your heart ache. After all he’d been through Bucky deserved more than the self – hatred he’d been made to feel. You wanted to give him back a piece of himself, even if for a moment. The problem was you’d just never had the nerve to broach the subject with him.

Until the accident. Perhaps it’d been the thought of never seeing him again without telling him how you feel, the delirium from your injury, or a bit of both. Whatever the case, you couldn’t stop picturing a scene with just the two of you dancing, Bucky smiling ear to ear. The image was so perfect you could believe you had died. So, without overthinking it, you’d asked him.

You’d been elated when he agreed. You worked hard and it had paid off, and he’d been there to help you initially. However, as the weeks went by Bucky became more reclusive. A dark shadow seemed to hang off of him, and it made you nervous. The Gala couldn’t come at a better time.

Now you sit in your wheelchair impatiently waiting for the elevator to take you down to the party. You smooth your hands over your curls and down to your white dress skirt, fiddling with the twin splits up to the tops of your thighs where intricate lace peaked through. You could walk now, in short bursts, but you couldn’t pass up the little show you could put on once you joined in the partying.

The elevator doors ding and slide open to reveal a very sophisticated Natasha. She wore a form – fitting, slate gray dress. Her fiery red hair is piled high on her head, little ringlets falling to frame her face. She looks stunning, as always. Nat whistles when you come into view. You roll your eyes but you grin widely. As you both settle into the descending compartment you shiver. Your veins buzz with the nervous anticipation.

“Are you ready?” Nat asks as she grips the handles for your wheelchair.

“Umm, excited, yes. Ready?... I’m not so sure yet.” You respond.

Nat pushes you out of the elevator and towards the double doors at the end of the hall. She steadies the seat as you stand.

“It’s going to be great, now get in there!” She encourages.

You take one last deep breath, roll back your shoulders, and waltz in. Your first steps are little wobbly, and you question for a moment if wearing the heels had been a good idea. You find your balance though and walk a little more confidently.

The event is in full swing. Civilians and agents mill about, chatting, laughing, and schmoozing the other Avengers. So many beautiful people but you are only interested in finding one in particular. As your eyes scan the crowd Steve steps in front of you, arms spread wide to take you all in. A beaming smile splits his face.

“Look at you! It’s good to see you are up on your feet again.” He exclaims, wrapping you up in a giant bear hug.

You laugh softly and return the embrace.

“Thanks, it’s good to be able to move around on my own. Have you seen…” you let the sentence trail off, slightly embarrassed to be so intent on the task at hand.

Steve pulls away and chuckles softly. He stands to the side and points to the bar in the far right corner.

“He’s over there. It took a lot to get him dressed and down here, so he’s brooding over a glass of bourbon. Seeing you might cheer him up though.” Steve pats your back good naturedly and steps behind you to greet Natasha.

Your heart flips inside your chest at the sight of him. Bucky looks stunning in the black, tailored suit. His dark, shaggy hair slicked back from his face. He turns his head at that moment to gaze out at the crowd. A small strand of hair falls rebelliously over his forehead, making him look a little more vulnerable than usual. As if attracted to your gaze his dazzling blue eyes lock onto yours. Your spirits dampen a little at the dark circles under them, his look a little hollow.

You begin to make your way over to Bucky, but every few feet someone stops you to congratulate you on your recovery and make small talk. Your gaze drifts back to Bucky every now and then. He had turned back around, hunched over the bar.

After what felt like an eternity you finally made it over. You lean against the counter and shift your body towards Bucky, beaming up at him. He continues to bore holes into the countertop. The circles under his eyes appear much worse this close up. Your smile falters a bit. You reach up for his hand.

"Hey, are you okay?" You squeeze your fingers around his metal palm.

His eyes flick up to your face, breaking himself out of his daze. He inhales deeply and adjusts his stance, drawing his hand out of yours in the process. You try not to let your disappointment show.

"Yeah, I'm great. Couldn't be better." He states flatly, a small lopsided grin forming but it doesn't reach his eyes.

He looks a little wild, like an animal caged and in desperate need to flee. You study him silently for a moment before you attempt to reach out to him again. Placing a gentle touch against his shoulder you try once more to get him to confide in you.

"I just... I'm worried about you." You hope your eyes convey the feeling and sincerity in your words.

Bucky holds your gaze for a beat before he scoffs.

"No need to worry about me, doll. I'm as fine as a warm, summer day in July." He takes a swig of his bourbon, grimacing as it burns down.

He returns to sullenly staring at the counter. You watch him sadly, letting your hand drift slowly down his metal arm. You feel each ridge through his suit. The band changes songs and your mind registers the slower tempo. Your smile regains its strength and you renew your efforts to draw Bucky away from the bar.

"Come on, I think I know a way to cheer you up" Your voice eager as you turn to pull him to the dance floor.

The farther you walk away, however, you feel Bucky's hand disappear from your hold. You slowly spin back and watch as Bucky pushes off the bar counter and heads to the exit, dragging his glass along the top. When he reaches the edge, he throws back his head and downs the rest of his alcohol. The glass clinks against the surface as he sets it back down and leaves through the doors you had entered.

You stand there at a loss, your high spirits quickly deflating. You knew it was silly to think so, but it felt like all eyes were on you and had witnessed your spectacular failure. A hand brushes against your shoulder and you jump. You look up at Steve's sympathetic face. At least one person had seen. He holds out his hand to you.

"I may not be as good a partner as him, but could I have this dance?” Steve asks.

You force a small smile and place your hand in his, your vision becoming blurry with unshed tears. He leads you to the dance floor and pulls you into position. You allow him to lead you through the song, eyes downcast at your feet.

"Hey."

You glance up to Steve's face. He smiles gently. "Give him some time, he's going through a bad spell."

You cast your eyes to the floor once more, saying nothing. The band closes the song and Steve tucks your arm through his, leading you around the room to mingle. You put on a brave face, being polite and friendly. A little while later Sam asks you to dance and you nod, pulling away from Steve. It's enjoyable and you appreciate their kindness in trying to cheer you, but you just want to wallow in self – pity. After an hour passes you decide enough time has passed to make excuses and retreat to your bedroom.

Everyone urges you to stay and revel a little more but you blame your departure on your healing leg and bow out. It wasn't a complete lie; a slow ache had begun in your muscle. Only when the elevator doors slide close do you allow yourself to shed the tears you'd been holding at bay. Some enchanted evening this turned out to be.

•••

Bucky shoots up off of his bed as his nightmare jolts him awake. He pants heavily, blinking to let his eyes adjust to the darkness. He looks down at his chest; the white dress shirt he'd passed out in clinging to his form from the sweat pouring off of his body. Bucky flops back down on the mattress breathing slowly to calm his rapidly beating heart.

It was just a nightmare. It wasn't real. Y/N is safe.

Probably. He hoped you were safe. He'd retreated from Stark's asinine party to ensure you'd be safe. From him.

The nightmares weren't an unusual thing. They'd plagued him since he'd come out of being the Winter Soldier. His past misdeeds coming back in pieces to haunt him. Now, though, they had begun to morph. Making Bucky believe he might be responsible for everything that failed in missions against Hydra. He had been their assassin after all. Couldn't they still find a way to control him?

They now begun to convince him he had caused the explosion that hurt Y/N. His relief had been so instantaneous when he'd found her that he'd wanted to do nothing more than hold her and keep her safe. He had determined to get closer to her when they got back. Then the nightmares made him realize how wrong he'd be for Y/N. Bucky had nothing good to offer her; just heartache and pain.

Since then he'd started distancing himself from her. He had intended never to set foot downstairs tonight, but Steve had been so adamant he attend Bucky couldn't really say no. The moment Y/N walked into the room he'd wanted to pull her close and never let go. She looked so radiant, and when she'd seen him? That smile would keep him warm for days. Bucky loathed how much he'd enjoyed her touch. She was too good for him. She didn't understand the things he'd done, not really. Which is why he'd needed to leave.

Here in his quiet room Bucky could strengthen his resolve to let her go. He swallows, the saliva sticking to his parched throat. He needed another drink, though it did nothing really. Just quenched a thirst. Figuring the party had long ended he makes his way back downstairs to the bar.

He's surprised to find Steve sitting alone at the bar when he arrives. Steve pours and downs a series of shots attempting to get enough alcohol in his system to generate a buzz. Bucky slides into the seat next to him and pours himself a shot. Steve glances over and snorts. He shakes his head in disapproval.

"You're a real jackass, you know that?" Steve says, a tinge of anger to his voice.

Bucky raises an eyebrow. "Not that I'm disagreeing, but what is it for this time?" He challenges.

Steve inclines his head to stare at Bucky for a moment. He shakes his head again and throws back another shot.

"If you really aren't aware then maybe don't make promises you don't intend to keep. My god, you didn't have to see her face. It was like you'd kicked a puppy.”

Bucky furrows his brows. Now he was really confused. He downs his own shot and slams it onto the counter.

"Kicked a puppy? What the hell are you talking about?" He demands.

"Y/N! She'd been working so hard to be able to dance with you tonight but your head is so far up your ass that you can't appreciate all that effort. A beautiful woman wanted to make you happy, but you're too busy focusing on sulking. I'm certain she's given up now." Steve brings the glass to his lips but thinks better of it. He sets the glass back down.

Bucky sits stunned. The alcohol he'd just consumed churning uncomfortably in his stomach. He had made Y/N that promise, hadn't he? That's where she'd been trying to lead him tonight but he'd been too stubborn to notice. He had wanted to keep her safe, not hurt her with his perceived callousness. Bucky rests his head against the counter, exhaling loudly.

"I'm an idiot." He admits to Steve.

Steve hums in agreement. Bucky needed to make this right, at least for Y/N's sake. He lifts his head and gazes at his lifelong friend.

"Help me fix this?" He asks.

"How?" Steve stares at him one eyebrow cocked in question.

Bucky mulls it over for a minute, an idea formulating. He smirks and says, "Do you think you have a way of getting onto Stark's landing platform?"

•••

You had gone to bed hours ago but sleep was far from you tonight. You'd wept heavily and though the tears had stopped flowing your depressed mood kept replaying the disaster of tonight over and over, trying to discover what you'd done wrong. To top it all off, you really had overdone the walking. The dull throbbing of over exertion radiating up your thigh, adding to your misery.

It'd all been for nothing.

You thought sadly. You could get up and take some pain killers, but you decide to use the pain to indulge in your pity party.

A soft knocking sounds at your door. You ignore it hoping whoever it is will assume you'd fallen asleep and leave you alone. A minute passes before the action is repeated. Again, and again. The fourth time you sigh in frustration. You'd think they'd get the hint! You sit up in bed pulling the covers up to your hips before you lean over and switch on your beside lamp.

"Come in." You grumble trying to infuse as much annoyance into your voice as possible.

You weren't really sure who you'd been expecting, but it certainly hadn't been Bucky. You glance down at his feet as he stands in the doorway, unable to meet his gaze. Neither of you says anything for a moment. Beginning to feel awkward you clear your throat.

"Is there something you want, James?" You rarely used his given name, but your feelings were still raw from his snub. Endearing nicknames were not what you wanted to use right now.

When he still doesn't respond you huff and shift away from him, flinging the covers over yourself. You really didn't want to play games. You hear his footsteps approach and travel across to the other side of the bed. You shut your eyes as soon as you feel the covers slide down your head and body. Another moment of silence passes. Finally, Bucky sighs and murmurs,

"Y/N, please look at me."

You want to refuse him, but curiosity won out. You slowly open your eyes and peer up at him, hoping the puffiness from your bout of crying isn't noticable. Bucky kneels, carefully picking up your hands and gingerly holding them against his firm chest. You feel the steady rhythm of his heart underneath. You glance at your joined hands than back up to his face, eyebrows quirked in confusion.

"I want a do over." He says finally, "I'm a complete idiot, I know. I need you to understand that I never wanted to hurt you. I made you a promise, and I never break my promises. Just ask Steve." He winks and grins widely, trying to alleviate the tension.

His mood swings were starting to make you feel like you were on a roller coaster. One moment he was sweet as honey towards you, the next he was acting like he wouldn't touch you with a ten-foot pole. It was getting tiresome.

"James..." You pull at your hands but they remain firm in his grasp. You inhale a shaky breath, tears pricking your eyes anew.

You drop your gaze to your body lying on the bed. You had wanted to give him one perfect night. The gift of one good memory out of so many bad ones. Now instead of the gorgeous gown you’d been wearing you were dressed in a plain chemise. Your curled hair brushed out, not to mention your face. It was scrubbed clean of makeup, a combination of you washing or crying it off. No, this was not how you had pictured yourself appearing when you made this memory. You offered a more practical excuse than this however.

"James, it's too late. I wanted tonight to be special for you, but I can't even stand right now. I – I overdid it tonight. My leg is killing me and I'd be useless as a dance partner." You laugh bitterly.

Bucky is quiet for a few seconds, his thumbs grazing the backs of your hands lazily. You can physically see the lightbulb go off in his head when he gives you a sly grin.

"I can work around that."

•••

After a little more convincing on his part, you agree to Bucky's do – over. He cautiously scoops you up and carries you bridal – style out into the hallway. Just as he had the day you'd been injured, although this time was much more pleasant.

Inside the elevator you rest your head on his shoulder, content to be close to Bucky like this. You let your eyelids shut for a moment, soothed by his even breathing. The elevator dips as it stops. You’re aware of the gentle sway as he resumes walking but you keep your eyes closed, trusting him.

“Open your eyes, doll.” Bucky whispers softly.

You comply, looking up at his face before shifting your gaze outwards. Your breath is taken by the sight.

Amid the stars and city lights below Tony’s landing pad twinkles with flashing lights. A soft wind blows a few strands of hair across your face as Bucky moves you out onto the center of it. The blinking lights illuminate you both. It was like you’d stepped out into the middle of the sky, surrounded by the tiny celestial bodies.

Lost in your wonderment you’re caught by surprise as Bucky gently drops your legs. He easily catches you by your waist before your feet even touch the ground, careful not to put weight on your healing leg.

He draws you closer, placing your feet atop his as the sound of an old forties song begins to play around you. You hold Bucky’s gaze with wide eyes, speechless.

“I know it’s a little late, but may I have this dance?” He asks in earnest.

You can only nod shyly. He smirks and wraps his metal arm around your middle, supporting your weight as he moves his feet to sway to the music.

As the music continues you laugh quietly, a little giddy from the whirlwind of emotions you’d felt that night. You press your cheek against his shoulder. Trying to memorize the feel of his arm pressed to your back. The soft material of his dress shirt wrinkled beneath your hands. The words of the music playing. You feel Bucky’s breath whisper against your ear.

“I’m sorry it took me so long to realize my mistake. I just… didn’t want you hurt because… of what I am. What I’ve been.” He admits.

You lift your head to stare into his clear blue eyes, the low light deepening them. Suddenly you’re aware of the hidden emotion in them, afraid of what they’ll find in your returning gaze. He was opening himself up to you, part of him expecting you to reject him. You notice his Adam’s apple bob as he swallows, uncomfortable with your scrutiny.

You smile sweetly, placing a gentle hand to his cheek, brushing your thumb along his cheekbone. His eyes flutter closed as he presses his face into your palm, so touch starved.

“Everyone was some darkness in their past, Bucky. You, Nat, Steve, Sam… even me. You can’t dwell in it forever, but if you must then let me stay in that darkness with you.” You intone quietly.

Bucky doesn’t respond, letting your words work themselves into his mind. The song slows and he dips you. You let your knees bend with the motion, holding his gaze. Without much thought you lean up and press your lips to his.

You would have thought you’d prodded him with a taser the way he jumped back. So caught off guard he drops you flat on your back, breaking the magic of the moment. You burst into laughter as Bucky swears and drops to his knees, apologizing. He scoops you into his lap, running his hands along your body, inspecting if he’d hurt you.

“I’m fine, Bucky. I’m a little sturdier than that. A little fall isn’t going to kill me.” You grasp his face between your hands, forcing him to meet your eyes.

“You’re a good man, James Buchanan Barnes. I believe in you, even if you don’t.” You say gently.

He glances down a moment, his hands trailing along your waist as he draws you closer.

“I’m beginning to understand that.” He says just before he captures you lips once more in a burning kiss.

EVERYTHING TAGLIST:

@booktvmoviefangirl @lowkeybuckyb @mrsdaamneron @xxashy999xx @c-ly-g @coal000 @rroguebones @ghostlyrose2 @part-time-patronus @emelielwh @peaceinourtime82 @buckysforeverprincess @geeksareunique @amnahs9695 @v-2bucky @scarlet-skywalkers @lokilvrr @thisismysecrethappyplace @sacre-bluhm @tatertot1097 @until-theend-oftheline @amoonagedaydreamer @marvelouspottering @thatfanficstuff @chuuulip @averyrogers83 @ellaprime68 @shield-agent78 @jewels2876

BUCKY BARNES TAGLIST:

@bloodiedskirtts @igotkatiepowers @misplacedorphan @superwholockwannabe @moonstruckhargrove @ladysergeantbarnes

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes fanfiction #james bucky barnes fanfiction #james bucky barnes x reader #the winter soldier #bucky angst #bucky fluff #marvel fanfiction

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honestlyfrance · 5 years ago

Text

Title: Music on the Eve

Square Filled: Free Space

Warnings: Slight cursing

Summary: New Year’s Eve party, and Sam stumbles upon Bucky alone.

—

Bucky Barnes has this extensive and flexible music taste as he hoards every genre into his song list. Tony Stark pays for his Spotify, Pepper Potts and he shares iTunes, and Steve Rogers shares his vinyl records. You can count on him already hearing a song you’ve just heard yesterday on your YouTube recommendations, and you can expect him to have a dance matched to it; Yes, Barnes knows how to appreciate music as much as you would like to think, and he’s expected to bring more to the table as the New Year comes by.

Nine more hours until Stark’s fireworks display, and nine more hours until the Avengers would be screaming until their throats burn out. Sam thinks. Shame on Carol Danvers for suggesting that. He likes the idea though, creating noise. It’s music for him.

Everyone was preparing for Tony Stark’s get-together at his Lakehouse, exclusive only for the Avengers and friends. Sam Wilson was assigned for drinks, and he’s brought as much alcohol as his car can take ( some six cases in the trunk and Natasha Romanoff assures him that she can arrange ten more cases into his car and carry five bottles of aged wine on her lap in the passenger seat ). When everyone heard that Natasha was helping him, they’ve placed bets on how much they’re bringing; the highest bet was twenty cases or so; the two swore to beat that.

Natasha had attached a wagon at the back of his car and at least ten cases sat there ( even then, Sam had told Thor to bring his Asgardian mead and was more than happy to oblige ). The four had also decided to play a scam; Barnes would come early with Steve Rogers ( who were assigned with pool stuff, especially Steve’s vast water guns; where he got them, no one knows ) and then placed a late bet of three hundred euros that at least thirty cases or so would arrive; Sam and Natasha would have sixteen cases plus ten which would be twenty-six, and Barnes would bring four cases of vodka which Natasha would sneak in with to claim it as hers. Steve wouldn’t know, and if he did, “Sam told Buck to hold it for him during the drive since the car was too full.” Fuck yeah, it’s foolproof! and if Tony doesn’t want to lose thirty grand, Thor wouldn’t give his mead to anyone but the super-soldiers, i.e. Steve, Natasha, and Barnes.

“You wearing that?” Natasha asked Sam as he entered the driver’s seat. Her eyebrows were raised as her lips twitched into a comfortable smile. “Looks good on you. Never saw a man pull off that look like you do. Only, like—several.”

Sam raised an eyebrow. “Have you looked at a mirror recently? ‘Cause you look great. Seen it on a mannequin before, but it looks great.”

Sam wore the same suit he wore in one of his interviews as Captain America, the velvet three-piece tuxedo, wherein ( in favor of Bucky’s suggestion right after wearing it for the first time ) he got rid of the maroon tie and unbuttoned the first two buttons, got rid of the silk jacket in favor of some random latte coffee-colored coat that seemed too big for him but looked too good on him to take off, leaving the white button-up and rolled it to his elbows, he also left the velvet pantsuit, he exchanged his loafers for his brown boots, and he seemed all set for the party. He wasn’t exactly the fashion kind, but he had the sense to pull off the attire to the best of his abilities.

Natasha wore a white off-shoulder top and a maroon skirt that reached past her knees. It was a new look Sam saw her wear, more her. Her heeled boots matched his, and she had a velvet plaid scarf around her neck in some intricate braid as well as yellow-tinted sunglasses. Her fiery hair with platinum blonde highlights was pulled into a braid that wrapped around her head that fell into a low bun. She had her dark brown coat wrapped around several bottles of wine—at least seven. She, on the other hand, had a sense of style among them, and she never failed once ( unless her cover called for bad outfits ).

They looked like they were planning on matching, and at that, they laughed heartily until they were gasping.

“Here—little something to pop that color on you.” Natasha removed her scarf around her neck and placed it lazily around Sam’s neck. It did bring out the purple on his suit, and Sam shook his head in amusement at that.

That was some time then. It’s six-hour hours until New Year’s Eve when they arrived.

They were greeted by the Stark family, little Morgan more than enthusiastic as she blew on her colorful horn in greeting on the doorstep. They were then helped by Happy Hogan in placing the cases inside that joined Barnes’s contribution, and they’ve reached thirty or so cases of alcohol ( Steve collected the betting money from everyone and was happy that he was entering the New Year with something in his pocket ). The cases were cracked opened almost immediately once the Asgardians came ( even Bruce had his early share, surprisingly) and three cases were already used. By then when the Guardians came, the party was in full swing.

Sam had a glass in his hand as he walked down the hallway leading to the backyard with Maria Rambeau on his left and Pepper Potts on his right. Rambeau had been talking enthusiastically about some mission she recently has done with Fury while Pepper shared her ridiculous shenanigans with the Avengers just as enthusiastically. Sam would converse about the ridiculous things he’s done for Steve but — he was distracted.

Before they both separated at the doorway, she whispered something to Sam, and Natasha was right: “Bucky was serving looks Tony couldn’t whip out.”

Bucky stood in front of the crowd on a table with Natasha on his arm, laughing and hollering about some story Sam couldn’t bear to hear over the loud drumming music that Peter Quill burdened to play. Something that definitely should’ve buried itself in the sixties. Bucky wore a mustard v-neck sweater and black jeans that clung onto him—fucking cuffed too. He wore his favorite brown boots, caked with mud he couldn’t wash off. He wore a mocha-colored velvet jacket folded to his elbows in which showed the latte color inside of the jacket. He had on those ridiculous gloves Sam dared him to wear as a joke, and the fact Bucky went through it made him laugh.

Bucky saw him and showed him his best attempt at jazz hands, cutting himself off to show the black motorcycle gloves with the stupid Captain America logos on them, turning to the crowd as Natasha continued the lively conversation for him.

“I didn’t know Bucky knew to dress,” Rambeau said.

Pepper sighed. “Tony begged me to let him approach Barnes to ask.“

Sam raised an eyebrow. “You still told him to keep his distance?"

Pepper shrugged, a glint in her eye as they stood on the porch. "No. But he has promised to keep his hands to himself about the arm."

Sam hummed as his eyes settled back on Bucky, and it almost seemed ephemeral. Sam almost felt overdressed—Tony had a full-fledged suit, but that didn’t matter. Bucky looks like himself, with his cut hair and beard; sporting clothes Sam knew to be the real him, Bucky was enthusiastic and at the same time was his quiet self.

After a few drinks and more chattering, the party was ready to hit the New Year: everyone had a drink in their hand, some even had grabbed a bottle for themselves ( the vodka was that good ); there had almost been a fight ( Clint Barton couldn’t bear seeing the thirty or so cases, and even argued that Bucky shouldn’t even have bet at the last minute ); Tony had generously awarded several people as Best Dressed, Sam included with five other people ( Natasha, Bucky, Pepper, Rhodey, and Hope Van Dyne took the cake ); and the crowd dissipated into several places—the car park where there was a movie going on, near the lake where most of the girls were sharing two cases of beer on the grass, the gazebo swarming with people around a pool table, some guys on the deck seeing who can throw the farthest rock, and some went inside to listen to the early century music playing ( more of jumping between Bach and Louis Armstrong while Natasha shows people how to drink like a Russian ).

Sam wanted quiet. That’s what he was searching for.

Sam placed his glass on the edge of the pool table and let Rhodey take over him. Wiping the corner of his lips as he took off his coat, Sam greeted some more people as he made his way inside.

Inside, he fixed his collar as he heard some quiet laughter by Maria Hill, Natasha, and Rambeau. Natasha motioned for the stairs, and what overcome Sam to follow her instructions baffled him and scrutinized him. He went up the stairs, and it was almost empty except for the lounge area where all of the teenagers were playing their music from the small speaker Harley Keener brought.

Michelle "MJ” Jones thumbed towards down the hallway, towards where the driveway situated and spoke no further. Sam followed—Why he was following subtle blink-and-you’ll-miss-it moments from these people, he did not know.

Sam rubbed the back of his neck as he ended up at the end of the hallway; he tried every door he passed him but they were locked. At the end of the hallway was a window doorway hidden by a curtain, and Sam pushed the door and was immediately greeted by Fly Me to the Moon by Frank Sinatra faintly played in the background. He closed the doorway and saw Bucky in the far corner on the armrest of the love seat there reading a book, biting on his flesh thumb as his legs splayed out beneath him. The moonlight and lamp beside Bucky served as his light, and the sudden chill of the night breeze urged Sam to rest his coat on his shoulders.

Bucky didn’t notice Sam, being too indulged in his book to bother to look up—but Bucky knew someone was with him; he heard the creak of the doorway and the footsteps that lingered on the other side.

Sam leaned against the railing as he looked out on the dirt path that faded into the front yard of the house where five cars parked, and if Sam turned to the extension of the balcony on the other side of the building, he would be able to see from above the current drive-in-movie happening.

“You got a nice birds-eye-view there?” Bucky calls out, not looking up from his page.

Sam turns around and grins at the joke, sauntering over to him and sitting at the far end of the red loveseat, throwing the throw pillow at Bucky who caught it. “There’s the light of the party. What? Are the War Machine stories not good enough? Said you’d love it,” Sam said. Bucky sat on the seat now, his feet against the wall as his legs rested on Sam’s lap; with a growing grin he suppressed with his teeth, he continued to read his book, his face suddenly lighting up with The Look.

“No, I love them…” Bucky turns to the next page; he held a paperback novel in his hands, too invested in the middle of the thick story to keep up with the conversation. His eyes were digesting vivid construction, all playing well into his imagination. “He’s funny, really is. I can see them… so vividly.”

“Are we talking about Rhodey or your book? What’s the title?”

Bucky stopped and his eyes peeled out from the book, and Sam could see his blue eyes glint with amusement and thrill. Bucky resigned to show the cover of the book as he draped an arm over his forehead theatrically, Sam smirking as he read The Da Vinci Code and Dan Brown on the worn-out cover covered with plastic.

“Have you read such a masterpiece?” Bucky said, his eyes closing as his companion laughed as he took the book away from him. Sam read the page he was on, and saw the familiar scenes, ingesting them as if he was in the book too.

“I’ve watched it, barely remembering it used to be a book,” Sam saw the exaggerated look of betrayal on Bucky’s face as the man took back the book, burying it even more to his face, mostly to avoid attention to his expressions. Bucky was growing into showing more unwanted emotions and was aware of the fact.

“We gotta watch it together,” Bucky whined, his voice muffled. “Langdon’s amazing. So is Sophie. So is fucking Dan Brown.”

Sam shook his head as he fell into a burst of easy laughter. “Sure. Whatever you say.”

The air settled down into a comfortable silence, with Frank Sinatra playing in the background, and Sam was still trying to figure out where it was. Some pop music was playing behind the wall, and the faint Jazz piano played from below, but Frank Sinatra was a stubborn bitch and ended up taking over Sam’s ears.

After long deliberation, Sam asked: “Where the fuck is that coming from?"

Bucky said, "What?”

“Frank Sinatra. Where is it?”

Bucky, without looking up from his book, raised the red speaker from the floor and onto his stomach, the faraway voice of Frank Sinatra played at a low volume with a few pitter-patter of rain in the background. Bucky raised the volume from his phone and continued to read, his eyebrows knitted in commitment.

Sam chuckled. “That’s cute.” He mumbles.

“Hmm… cuter,” Bucky murmured, covering his face with the book as he slides downwards into the love seat, half his body on Sam as the other man set his arm across the couch and the other arm on Bucky’s leg.

“What was that?”

“Hmm… seen cuter,” Bucky grumbled.

Sam shakes his head, closing his eyes as he leaned his head back, listening intently to the rain background on the song edit. He knew better than to realize it was an edited loop, at least an hour.

Bucky turned his body away from Sam as he rested his chin on the railing, sitting upright; Bucky had his eyes widened as he read the next few lines, but not only that, his chest tightened and he felt his blood rise to his cheeks. Did he call me cute? Fuck, did he? He couldn’t seem to turn the page, and however many times he read the page over and over again, he couldn’t understand it; all he could read was Sam Wilson.

Bucky knew that Sam still had his head leaned back and that only made Bucky tenser than before.

“What,” Bucky heard Sam say. “Getting into it?”

Bucky saw Sam enter the party and knew he was doomed from the start. Bucky started drinking so much, and he had drunk five bottles of beer within the first hour with Valkyrie, or Brunnhilde as he was allowed to call her, grateful that no one had the right mind or acknowledgment that he was a super-soldier, so everyone ultimately never knew that he couldn’t get drunk. Bucky then excused his blushing over his supposed drunkenness instead of seeing Sam in his ( Bucky’s ) coat and the collarbone he showed off. And was that the scarf that he gifted Natasha with? That bitch.

Bucky hummed. “Pretty fucking intense.”

“Tell me about it."

Bucky could feel his heart in his throat, almost choking him as all the heat gathered on his face, and he knew he didn’t need a mirror to know he was red.

Bucky grabbed his beer bottle and sipped at it, and not wanting to turn, Sam had brought the cushioned chair from below the table and brought it across Bucky, sitting on it; Sam propped up an elbow and rested his cheek against his palm, raising an eyebrow as he gave Bucky a patient look.

Bucky hid behind his book, quietly whining to himself.

Sam lowered down the book with his finger, revealing the blue eyes that lingered onto the words inked into a page, and the flustered skin of Bucky Barnes; as far as Sam was concerned, there was no part in the book that could make Bucky this embarrassed. Maybe me, Sam thinks, but that seems too farfetched to consider.

"I love it so much, you don’t understand,” Bucky murmurs, his eyes still on the book as it rests too near his lips. Sam hasn’t lifted his hand off of the book, and he doesn’t plan for it so soon. “The pacing and clues and everything. His cleverness—” Bucky’s eyes met brown ones. “—it’s something.”

Sam tilts his head, smiling. Damn that smile. “That character really is something.”

Bucky hums, not leaving his eyes. “He is, ain’t he…"

"Who are we talking about…”

“Take a wild guess—it’s not the professor anymore…”

Sam chuckles, still not looking away. “So, edited songs? Never should surprise me, but… it did.”

Bucky snorted, looks away only to meet eye contact again. “Why would it surprise you so much? You’ve known me so well I wouldn’t be surprised if you knew."

Sam’s lips parted. "Knew what?"

Bucky dog eared his page and placed it on the flat surface of the railing, burying his lips into his wrist as he looked away for a complete moment; for a moment, Sam saw his cheeks flare. "That…” Bucky scratched his head, avoiding eye contact. “I… can’t get… drunk?” Bucky raises a hand and an eyebrow; the two sharing a short laugh. “No—that, I, too, am a super-soldier."

"I knew that.”

Bucky stops himself, burying his lips into his fist as he closed his eyes. “Fuck, What don’t you know about me?”

Sam sighed, leaning back, looking out toward the horizon. “Well, shit, I don’t know, Your New Year’s resolution?” He said, looking back at him coolly. “Tell me all about it.”

Bucky stares at him, looking something past Sam’s irises in search of something malleable, something tangible. “I want to stay like this,” he tells Sam, and he’s so sure of it. “I want this to be… anything stable… and agreeable."

Sam searches for the same thing Bucky searched in his eyes— something agreeable, something that says, Here. This. This is where we are, where we agree, where we stay. And so Sam says: "No one’s calling for us. What else do you want?”

“Hmm…"

Frank Sinatra plays in the background, and Bucky replays the one hour loop as they stayed still, afraid to ruin the constant they wanted to bring to the next year; they both feared the worst, but who was able to take this away from them? A villain? Another Avengers Fallout? The other? No. Sam and Bucky were so good for each other that they’d have to be joking to leave the other behind.

"Go with me,” Sam says as he searches for some sort of resistance from the other man.

Bucky laughs at some distant memory. “I’ve got you,” he whispers. “in exchange for everything you’ve done for me, I got your six, your twelve, your nine, your everything."

"You have nothing to exchange.”

“Don’t think of it as a favor. Think of it—Think of it as my…"

Sam said, "What?”

Bucky shrugged. “Partnership. Compassion. Love?” His face contorts into something that was convincing itself that he did hear what he did say.

Sam chuckles as he breathes in, hearing the faint bellowing countdown of the people in the far distance, but Frank Sinatra is a stubborn bitch and he’s all Sam and Bucky could hear as the mimicked sounds of gunfire echoed in the inky atmosphere, and in the far distance, if they craned their necks at the right angle, they could see the winking flames of different colored fireworks in the distance over at the other side of the lake. The sounds of fireworks sound too much like bullets firing, but they were too deep into this to be afraid anymore.

Sam sighs. “I like the sound of that."

They don’t share a kiss, although they both knew what the other wanted to bring onto the table as they entered the new year: Music, one that consisted of both of their drumming hearts as they beat against their ribs, aching for release. Music, one they shared, one that their voices will drum together to say, I love you, as always.

#sbbingo1 #sambucky #winterfalcon #sam wilson #bucky barnes #mcu #marvel #happy new year guys #france: works #france: writing

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evolutionsvoid · 6 years ago

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Just by looking at them, you can easily guess that the Furceros are related to the Cyclops. Both are single-eyed reptilian creatures who possess tusks and the ability to change the color of their hide. In fact, certain cultures refer to the Furceros as "Lesser Cyclops," as they are smaller and much less aggressive than the massive Cyclops (do note that the Furceros are not a fan of this name. Being referred to as "lesser" is not something they enjoy). They can also be found in the same areas as the Cyclops, though they tend to highly prefer the tropics and jungles. The key differences between them and the Cyclops are their long, thin legs, prehensile tail and sticky tongue. The long limbs help with climbing trees and thick vegetation, while their tails aid with grappling and also serve as a kickstand! Unlike the Cyclops, whose tongue is reduced and trivial, the Furceros possess a sticky tongue that can reach out almost two feet! While this is not as impressively long as other chameleons, it is meant more for probing cracked exoskeletons and pulling in food past their long tusks. These pointed teeth are good as tools, but they often get in the way for eating, so their long tongue helps fix that! As I mentioned, the Furceros are one of the main sapient denizens of the rainforests and jungles. They place their homes deep in these dense forests, to the point where it is incredibly difficult to locate them unless you have a map or are extremely lost. Due to their preference for the deep jungle, outside cultures are suspicious of them and see them as a secretive and insidious group. Some believe that both they and the Gralatars are the defenders of the ancient ruins and temples hidden within, and that any explorer who vanishes during a quest have most likely been slain by these "beasts." While Gralatars are seen as trap-makers and hunters through trickery, the outside world sees Furceros as deadly assassins. Due to their ability to change the color of their skin, the Furceros are believed to be able to become practically invisible in their jungle home. Tales speak of unseen foes who come from all sides and drag poor souls into the deep brush, never to be seen again. Beings like ghosts that drop from above and then vanish with their victims like smoke. Ask any common person outside the jungle about the Furceros, and they will speak of invisible assassins and vicious specters that defend their forest home. While these stories are indeed spooky and chilling, they are also 100% garbage. It's almost funny how wrong people have it about the Furceros, because if there is one thing the Furceros despise more than anything, it is the idea of blending in. If you ever actually met a Furceros, you would not be dealing with a stealthy shadow but a boisterous rainbow that is ready to punch you in the face with an array of vibrant and obvious colors. To put it simply, the Furceros are not subtle people, and they are quite happy that way. No camouflage or simple appearances for them, they want to stand out. Not only will they change their hides to be an array of bright colors, but they will also cover themselves in as many colorful things they can find. To their culture, appearance and color is everything. It is a status of power and position to them, as well as a tool they use during the mating season. To be biggest and brightest person around is to command the attention of everyone in the room. You don't get noticed with drab colors and simple trinkets, no, you get all the attention through intricate feather accessories, painted tusks and dyed bones. You can see this when you meet their chieftains, as they often have the biggest and loudest headdresses and garbs you will have ever seen. You can also witness this if you happen to be a common dryad that doesn't really have that many colors on her. When I first came to the village, every one of them kept giving me this puzzled look and they often didn't pay much attention to me. Turns out, they were confused by my lack of decoration and believed I was trying to be sneaky and suspicious by not standing out. I talked with them about it and they told me that I was simply too bland and drab to be noticed (which was nice because it cleared up the issue, but still HEY!), so they decided to dress me up. The sheer amount of paint, feathers and trinkets they put on me was crazy! After I left to my next expedition, I had to spend three days scrubbing myself to get all the body paint off! It was quite something trying to explain to everyone why I was colored blue and yellow!

Though some may see this cultural practice of theirs silly and juvenile, it is something that is a huge part of their tribes. Not only is one's attire and colors important for being noticed, but it is also crucial for ceremonies and catching the attention of a mate. In fact, the time of year where they find suitors is the absolute most anticipated days of their lives. Everything before and after these few days are building up to such a grand event. To lay it down in simple terms first, the males of the tribes are looking to woo the females with their colorful getup and complex costumes. If a female likes what she sees, she will approach the male and the two will go off together and begin their relationship. In time, this will lead to offspring and so on so forth. The thing to keep in mind, though, is that it is not as simple as I just wrote it. One does not simply win the females over with the appearance they carry with them day to day. To truly win their hearts, one must make a super special costume and display. To do this, the males of the tribe will spend their entire year leading up to this moment gathering materials and working on their courting display. This will always be done in secret, and it is taboo for a male to let anyone see their costume before that special day (especially if it is a female that sees it). What they want is to build up anticipation and then surprise everyone with their special appearance. If someone were to see it before the ceremony, then they wouldn't be getting the strongest response. These courting garbs they make and wear will wildly vary between individuals (because you don't want to show up to the dance wearing the same clothes as another person! How embarrassing!), as they are constructed with special preferences and ideas in mind. Some may go after a specific color scheme, while others may look to have a theme. Certain males who have their eye on a specific female may try to learn what her favorite things are so that they may incorporate them into their costume. Since these costumes are incredibly complicated and intricate, they require a great deal of materials and resources. A good chunk can be gained by trade and personal collecting, but a lot will come from their hunts for food. When it is time to hunt for food, the leaders of the tribe will create hunting groups and then select four to six individuals to fill each of these parties. What is important here is that the leaders will decide which territories each group will hunt in, sending their best hunters to places where prey is bountiful and the lesser ones to areas that are a bit more limited. Those who want recognition and a cut of the kill will seek to be placed in the first group of hunters, as that means they have a better chance of downing prey and claiming valuable materials. Those picked for the weaker parties and sent to places where prey is a bit more scarce will be a little bummed out, but will use this hunt to try and impress the chieftains. If they can bring back big prey or lots of food, than perhaps next time they will get a shot at being in the lead party. For these hunts, both males and females will participate, as they both desire the goods that come from downed prey. These hunting parties search the jungle floor and understory for meat and edible plants. They tend to use long-reaching tools, like spears and polearms that they craft from wood, stone and sap. You may notice that their weapons are just as flashy and decorated as they are, which is actually more important than you may think. Each Furceros' weapon is unique to them, so that there is no confusion on whose tool is the one that landed the killing blow. When prey is downed, the first thing the group will do is look to see whose weapon is the one that finished the beast off. When it is decided, the lucky hunter will be given prime pickings on the fallen prey. What I mean is that this hunter will get to select one piece or part of the animal that they get to keep for themselves. After that, the next hunter will get a pick, and then the next and so on and so on. What they are taking is not the meat or flesh, but things like feathers, beaks, claws and other decorative materials. These collected goods will be added to their personal trinkets, or the males will use them to help construct their special courting costume. Though females do not make courting displays, they will still collect pieces of slain prey so that they can add them to their own appearance. Males who are interested in a certain lady should be observant when she goes to collect her piece from prey, as that will give hints on what her preferences are. Once each hunter has claimed their trophy, they bag the meat and continue the hunt. At the end of the day, they shall return to the village and spread the food around. In time, the courting days will finally arrive and the tribe will prepare itself for the special ceremony. The young and old will work to set up the stage and decorations for the event, while the competing males go to their burrows to don their garbs. The eligible females will line the designated "walkway," where they will sit to watch the show and judge the presenting males. A structure similar to a stage curtain is made to hide the males from the ladies' gaze until the time is right. The leaders will have a list of names that they will announce, which is the cue for the specific male to take to the walkway and show off. They will strut down the path, often adding some dance moves to further add to the display. They have a short window of time to walk down to the end of the walkway, then turn around and return to the hidden curtain. It is this brief time where the females will watch and judge their displays, looking to see if any of the males win their admiration. At any time they may choose their potential mate, be it during the show or after all the displays have finished. For them, it is first come first serve, so it is important that they make their decision before someone else beats them to it. If one male has a rather incredible display, you may see a few females quickly getup and hurry to the backstage to be the first in line. Even after the show, the undecided females may ponder their decision for a few days. Some may decide that none were worthy and then wait for the next year, while some may ultimately choose which display stuck out the most to them. The couples who come together that night will spend their next years developing their bond and raising offspring, while the unpicked singles will get to work improving their display for the following year. While this ceremony is important to them, it is by no means a serious event. It is practically one big party, with food, drink and merriment being shared between all. I have had the honor of being invited to one of these events, and I have to say it is a dangerously good time! So much cheering, eating and drinking! The dances that occur after the event seem to last for hours, which can be quite tiring if one has had too many goblets of fig wine! I would gladly have a night like that again, but never would I wish to experience the morning after again! Not in this lifetime! This courting ceremony of theirs is not the only event they hold during the year, as the Furceros are quite the partying group! It seems like almost every month has a special ceremony or ritual they perform, which is meant to appease the gods and strengthen the bond of the village. Though the outside world may like to pretend they're insidious, explorer-eating beasts, they are actually quite the friendly group! In fact, they have even been capable of befriending Floral Dryads! Really! It is shocking to believe and amazing to see! It turns out that Floral Dryads who live in or near these tropical areas are actually quite close to the Furceros. It seems their love for colors, ceremony and flare have given them a thing in common, and the two species are great friends. I would never have suspected! To think those snooty plants could be friends with a tribe of lizards; or friends with anything! Imagine my shock when I finally found the Furceros village I was searching for! Here I was, pushing through dense jungle, hoping to find a hidden tribe that has (supposedly) remained isolated from the outside world for centuries, only to have my first sight be a Floral Dryad helping fix up a Furceros' flower wreath! And to think I was worried about finding a translator! Anyways, Floral Dryad communities that live near Furceros tribes will often form a partnership, where the dryads will grow crops and fruits while the Furceros hunt for meat. The two will trade for food, trinkets and other colorful things, and when the time comes for celebration, all parties are invited. It appears the Floral Dryads down here are much friendlier and open than the ones back home, which makes me want to take some back up north to help set their fellow sisters straight! Not only are they partners with dryads, but they do seem to share a bond with the spidery Gralatars, though this was not always the case. From the stories, it seems the two tribes were at odds with each other, as the Furceros enjoyed feeding on the enlarged spiders and the Gralatars weren't too pleased with that. The two tribes fought each other for years, until the day their god intervened. It sounds like the "God of the Jungle" rose up and demanded that the two cease their warring, as they were both children of his domain. Through him and the words of a faithful "Priestess" (It's always capitalized in the tales, I don't know why), the two species made up for their previous sins and struck a deal. They would no longer be enemies and they would respect the homes and lives of each other. While not all of them are the closest of chums, they coexist with one another and uphold their end of the bargain. The Gralatars will stick to the canopies and trees, while the Furceros hang down below. All may travel where they please, as long as they respect the territory they are in. The two species even trade with each other, with the Furceros mainly looking to get their claws on the Gralatars' silk. Their webs can make strong rope and unbreakable nets, which the Furceros use in construction and hunting. One of their favorite things to trade for are "Sticky Nets," which are made of Gralatar webbing that has not been dried. They use this special tool on Great Mottled Caecilians, as it not only pins the great beasts down, but it also subdues their ravenous colonies of Peeler Beetles. The large amphibians can then be slain, while the gobs of beetle-covered webbing are then dried and broken up to get a load of delicious crunchy beetles! Yum! In conclusion, the Furceros are a fun, happy group that do not deserve the myth of being deadly or dangerous. Such tales and stories need to come to an end, before anything wicked comes from these misguided assumptions. There is no violence or malice to be found here, only merriment and fun! The only thing that I experienced during my time with them that could even remotely considered mean was when I showed up wearing things that I thought were colorful and flashy. I preemptively tried to dress vibrantly because I knew they respected those that were decked out in colors and trinkets. Turns out my definition of "showy" came nowhere close to theirs. The only way I could have been more underdressed was if I was bark naked. The looks I got was the ones who gave to a child when they got into mom's makeup and tried to "look pretty." I mean c'mon guys, I was trying! Chlora Myron Dryad Natural Historian

#chameleon #reptile #lizard #monster #creature #lizardman #art #drawing #cyclops

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scrawnydutchman · 6 years ago

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Incredibles 2 Movie Review (Spoiler Free)

Pixar has become somewhat infamous for releasing nostalgia pandering sequels in recent years. Cars 2 & 3, Toy Story 4, Finding Dory, Monsters University. These all have their fans to be sure but many people, myself included, wished for more fresh and original ideas from Pixar that made them so great to begin with, rather than friendly reminders of how great they once were. So needless to say I’ve never been horribly interested in a great deal of the Pixar sequels . . . that is except for Incredibles 2. After the third Toy Story I’ve been saying for years that Incredibles is the only Pixar property that actually needs a sequel. Why? Because it’s a premise that’s ripe for continuation. I’m a huge fan of the first Incredibles, so much so that it’s my favorite 3D animated film ever. I loved the family dynamic, the performances, the dialogue, the design, the action. It was cool, slick, charming and heartfelt. It had the stylish edge of a spy thriller with the action of a superhero blockbuster. To put it simply, I wanted to see the Parr family do more superhero AND family antics. So needless to say I was as pumped for this movie as anyone. Did it live up to my expectations? Hell yes it did. It was everything I was hoping to get and improves on a great deal of where the first film left off in fact . . . while also being weaker in some other areas. Let’s break it down.

Story:

Synopsis: The Parr Family is back in action, continuing their superheroing despite the fact that doing so is still illegal (why the legalization of supers wasn’t even considered after the family saved the city from Syndrome, I have no idea. But whatever. Just go with it.) Things might change for the better though when Elastigirl gets an offer from a telecommunications expert to share her superhero perspective on why these heroic acts shouldn’t be shunned. While she takes up her new job, Mr. Incredible fights his own battles of being a stay at home dad and realizes it isn’t as easy as he thought it was going to be, especially since Jack Jack demonstrates a new superpower every second. Things for Elastigirl get complicated as a mysterious new villain called Screenslaver makes their appearance. Can she get to the bottom of Screenslaver’s new plan before things turn for the worst?

I mentioned before that Pixar has a known tendency to pander a lot to nostalgia in their sequels, and Incredibles 2 is no exception. There’s more than a few references and repeats of the first film including reused sound effects, shots, settings, cinematography and so on. While these certainly are present and are admittedly a touch distracting at times, make no mistake; this sequel has it’s own identity to it. The concept is interesting, I love the idea of the parents more or less reversing their roles from the first film and all the comedic antics those bring . . .and every scene involving Jack Jack got uproarious laughs in the theater. Admittedly the story has a few noticeable holes and isn’t as tight as the first film, but they weren’t nearly noticeable enough to ruin the experience as a whole. Also the movie kind of falls short in terms of pacing; by the end of it I was honestly kind of amazed that it felt over so quick. For whatever reason the first film felt way more like it took it’s time, despite the fact that there’s only a difference of 3 minutes between each films runtime.

Characters:

The characterization of each family member is arguably the Incredibles greatest appeal. It’s so much fun watching this family interact with one another. This time around the family dichotomy ups the anti with a handful of cute little moments between members. I loved all the interaction between the siblings and the parents and they have constantly great dialogue between each other just as the first film does. Mr. Incredible is probably the most accurately portrayed dad in the history of animated films; he reminds me so much of my dad it’s actually insane. There’s also one VERY small interaction between Dash and Frozone that I won’t give away but the moment I heard it I completely gushed. Also, while not as developed a villain as Syndrome in terms of motivation, Screenslaver is one hell of a cool bad guy. While Syndrome was a larger than life hamfisted manchild who loved to boast and brag, Screenslaver is a cold and calculated entity whose hidden behind layers and layers of intricate planning and espionage. Again, Screenslaver’s motivations aren’t as fleshed out or as interwoven with the family as Syndrome is but the villain more than makes up for it in aesthetic and outright creep factor. I kind of wish the movie spent more time keeping Screenslaver’s identity shrouded in mystery as that was when the appeal was highest IMHO but the twist is pretty good too. I won’t spoil it obviously, but I thought it was a pretty clever way to spread everything out. I do wish they gave Dash a bit more to do in the film though. While he has a memorable fast paced chase scene in the first movie Dash is unfortunately given next to nothing here; opting instead for more screentime for Jack Jack. In fact, both he and Violet pretty much get the shaft in favour of their baby brother when it comes to what is supposed to be their big action scene. All well. I still enjoyed seeing them again.

Visuals (Animation, Composition, Visual Storytelling, Etc.)

*this shot of Dash and Jack Jack running through a series of portals is among the most memorable.*

While the script and plot of this sequel all in all recaptures the appeal of the first Incredibles but falls just short in matching it in quality and pacing, one thing it absolutely improves upon this time around is the visuals. This film is gorgeous as one may expect it to be. The textures are beautiful, the use of the trademark Incredibles colour scheme involving shades of orange and red is great. The characters this time around are a bit more on the geometric and cartoony side whereas the first film was more rounded and mushy looking, which is a welcome change IMO. The animation is excellent as predicted. The characters move and behave their own charming ways and the facial expressions in particular are ON POINT in the film. Not to mention the slapstick is a lot better. The big thing where the visuals really shine though is the action. OH MY GOD the action in this film alone is worth price of admission. This is right up there with the first Kung Fu Panda when it comes to fight scenes oozing with creativity. The way characters utilize their powers, the way they interact with their environment, the way the stakes in every fight build as they progress, the way one action follows up another and it’s so clear despite it being so quick. It was simply excellent. The story developers have come up with stuff for this film I would have never thought of in a million years and it’s the coolest damn thing every time.

One minor thing to note; you may have scene a seizure warning floating around on the internet for a particular scene in this movie. I’m telling you right now; they weren’t kidding. I’m not epileptic but it was quite a bit for me. I’d take the necessary precautions before you see it thinking it’s safe. While the scene in question is definitely a bit of a strain on the eyes, it’s undoubtedly a really cool aesthetic regardless.

Voice Acting Performances:

Holly Hunter, Craig T. Nelson and Samuel L. Jackson all return for their iconic performances as Elastigirl, Mr. Incredible and Frozone. They all do as great a job as they’ve ever done and haven’t gotten the least bit rusty. Craig T. Nelson still plays a down to earth sentimental father. Holly Hunter still plays an empowered, sharp and quick-on-her-feet mother. Sam Jackson still plays a suave and cool Frozone. Sarah Vowell returns as Violet and gives a great performance for the awkward, pugnacious yet responsible teen. Brad Bird is directing/writing again which means he also returns as Edna Mode; as entertaining as ever. We also get some exceptional performances from voice actors acting as standins for the first films roles. Huck Milner takes the role of Dash this time around and plays it very close to Spencer Fox. Between Dash and Nemo in Finding Dory Pixar has an uncanny ability for replacing child actors after the first got much too old. The only performance that kind of stands out as not really matching the original is Jonathon Banks as Rick Dicker. I could tell instantly he wasn’t quite the same as the late Bud Luckey (R.I.P). All well; a small gripe in the grand scheme of things. The newcomers such as Catherine Keener and Bob Odenkirk are great. Overall, great performance from everyone.

Sound design (Score, Sound effects, etc.)

Yet another great element from the first movie that makes a triumphant return: the damn jazzy MUSIC. You can’t tell me you don’t get pumped up just from the killer soundtrack to Incredibles by itself. Those fans of said soundtrack should stick around until after the credits for a special treat in that regard. The sound effects for the film are great too, particularly the original made sounds for each of the superpowers. Not a whole lot else to say; it just nailed it.

Conclusion:

Fans of the original will not be disappointed. It’s got all the appeal of the first with a great set of original stuff to be it’s own visual experience. It about matches the first in overall quality with it’s superior visuals and action but inferior story and pacing. If you haven’t checked it out already please do. I haven’t had that much fun in the movie theater in quite some time.

Story: 1.5 out of 2 - Above Average

Characters: 1.5 out of 2 -Above Average

Visuals: 2 out of 2 - Excellent

Voice acting performances: 2 out of 2 - Excellent

Sound Design: 2 out of 2 - Excellent

9 out of 10 - A worthy successor!

#pixar #disney #disney pixar #incredibles #incredibles 2 #brad bird #film #movies #film review #animation #3d animation

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bizarre-dollhouse · 7 years ago

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My Top 10 Favourite Anime (And Why You Should Watch Them)

This is normally something I would put on my main blog, but I wanted to celebrate a follower milestone and also I know this will reach a significantly wider audience on this blog.

Consider this both a list of recommendations and a *get to know me* thing, I guess.

Honourable Mentions:

Bakemonogatari: A really stylized show about a semi vampire helping people with their supernatural afflictions born from emotional issues. The subsequent seasons get a little questionable, but this is definitely a standalone story with great dialogue and visuals. (15 eps)

Shiki: Creepy story about a small town infested with vampires. Really brutal and sick, but it has fascinating themes. The pacing is a bit slow and it has a kind of bad scene towards the end, but the show is 100% worth it. (24 eps)

Cardcaptor Sakura: Because this is mostly aimed at younger viewers, I would only really recommend this show for either magical girl fans, or people who watched the extremely altered dub as a kid. That being said, its a cute, fun show about magic with a likeable cast and surprisingly creative and original ideas, especially towards the latter half. (70 eps)

Jojos Bizarre Adventure 4: Diamond is Unbreakable: Full disclosure, I have not seen the first 3 jojo series, but its not necessary to enjoy this show. This is a super creative and really fun series about superpowered badasses in a strange city fighting each other and trying to solve a murder mystery in the background. Weird, but in the best way. (39 eps)

Kuroshitsuji: Book of Circus: This should be higher on the list, but in truth I would recommend the manga way over the show. But, if you want to watch a supernatural horror/comedy without reading a 138+ chapter manga, OR you were a fan of the original Black Butler seasons and want to see something way better, give this a watch. (10 eps)

*drumroll*

10. Trigun

So Trigun takes place is this old west, yet mysterious science fiction-y world where, through a bunch of complicated scenarios, a pacifist is the most wanted criminal known to man. Due to his status as a “natural disaster,” two insurance workers are tasked with reining him in to save their business. It’s an incredibly charming series, and the protagonist is really likeable. It’s extremely creative, funny, and emotional near the end. I do have some problems with the ending because it almost seems like the final conflict just...solves itself, but that’s a nitpick. The first episode is basically a short film, so give that a watch and see how you feel. (26 eps)

9. Paranoia Agent

This was directed by the late and great Satoshi Kon and has his usual themes about the blurring between fiction, dreams, and reality. It’s about a string of mysterious assaults committed by a kid with a baseball bat, and how these assaults seem to solve the problems of the victims. It’s very arthouse and has a twist that makes me ball my eyes out even though it’s not sad it’s just...odd and overwhelming. It drags a bit near the middle, but if you like kind of surreal stuff that’s also just really good, you have to watch this show. (13 eps)

8. Baby Steps

The amazing thing about this show is that its premise is specifically designed to make me hate it. It’s about a nerdy teenager who starts to play a sport for the sole sake of getting fit and having a more well rounded life style, and also he has a crush on this really popular girl. That sounds fucking awful, but the main character is actually really likeable (he reminds me a lot of Deku from BNHA) and I swear to fucking god every time I thought this show was going to do something awful and cliched with its romantic comedy plot, it doesn’t. The beauty and the geek trope is still there, but all of the bullshit that comes with it is omitted in a way I feel was kind of self-aware. The sports aspect is really good too: it’s well paced and there’s lots of tension even though the show as a whole is really upbeat and pleasant. I had a blast watching it, and if you can make it past the fact that is has god awful animation, give it a watch.

7. Higurashi: When They Cry

Yet another great show with absolute garbage animation. Anyways, this show is about a group of teenagers in a small town who are unknowingly trapped in a time loop. In each loop there’s a bunch of new mysteries, as well as some extremely brutal murders and tortures experienced my the main cast. I’ve seen a number of Western shows (Orphan Black, BBC Sherlock, Lost, Supernatural, etc.) fall apart because the writers want a really clever and intricate mystery to play out, but they don’t want to actually put the time into crafting one, so it’s just a bunch of cliffhangers with no answers or pay off. THIS SHOW SUCCEEDS AT WHAT ALL OF THOSE OTHER SHOWS FAIL AT. While not all of the answers are great (the second season isn’t as good) the original author somehow made the world’s most ludicrously complicated mystery story work, with a lot of it relying on the audience to put all of the pieces together even when the characters can’t. Its very clever in doing that: it makes its audience feel smart. It also has themes that don’t really show up in other horror stories, even though they’re incredibly relevant to fear and violence. Great show, go watch it. (50 eps)

6. Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood

Everyone knows about this show, everyone says it’s great, and everyone’s right. If you’ve been living under a rock for ten years: the show is about two brothers who break an alchemy taboo, which destroys their bodies, They’re on the hunt for something to restore them to normal and along the way they meet like 8990354578579 characters with interesting stories. It’s tightly written and really gripping. It’s fun, but also really dramatic and emotional when it needs to be. My only problems with it are that the ending is reaaaallllly convoluted, and there’s a minor plot point earlier on that gets weirdly dropped, but everyone kinda forgets about those things because the show’s so good. Also the brotherly bond makes me cry. (64 eps)

5. FLCL

I honestly don’t even know where to start with this show because it has the unique property of being the only show I have ever seen that I have literally no problems with. Not even nitpicks. There is nothing wrong with this show; it’s perfect. The only reason it’s not number 1 is because some other shows have more ideas or more fleshed out characters. So this arthouse spastic comedy is about a boy who is disappointed with all of the adults in his life, then some chick hits him in the face with a guitar and giant robots from a secret facility start coming out of his head. It’s fucking wild and has like 30 different aesthetics and I love all of them. It’s the best looking show I’ve ever seen and one of the best directed. It feels like someone read a really weird poem and turned it into a 6 episode show. It’s funny, it’s emotional, it’s cartoony, it’s beautiful, it’s raunchy, it’s poetic, it’s silly, it’s creative, and it’s got strong themes. The wtf visuals, the nonsensical plot, and the amazing soundtrack make an aesthetic experience more than anything. (6 eps)

4. Princess Tutu

I already made a post about this show and why it’s good, which you can check out here, but the gist is it’s a meta fairytale about a duck that turns into a girl to help a storybook prince find his emotions. I used to love stories that were “twists on fairytales” or whatever, but after watching this show I realized that the genre is pretty derivative. This show is so amazing it honestly made me reevaluate an entire genre and come to the conclusion that this is the only member of that genre worth watching. It’s truly creative and well crafted with fantastic characters. (26 eps)

3. Hunter x Hunter (2011)

This show is basically a bunch of creative ideas, unique set pieces, and interesting characters stacked on top of each other in a trench coat disguised as a narrative. It’s about a perky shonen protagonist and a child assassin becoming friends while also trying to become hunters (a position involving vast wealth and adventure). It’s in a modern fantasy setting so literally anything can happen. In one arc they have to play life-or-death dodgeball against robots, and another is an insanely epic tale about the intense evil that people are capable of (feat. a 25 episode climax). I can’t even talk about all of the themes or ideas because there are just too many. Because of it’s wild, sprawling story, it has a lot of ass pulls and retcons, but in the grand scheme of things they don’t really matter. It’s long, but super easy to watch in huge chunks. (148 eps)

2. Neon Genesis Evangelion and The End of Evangelion

The most efficient way to describe this show is to say that it’s the most interesting show ever made. It’s about an apocalyptic future in which emotionally disturbed teenagers must pilot giant bio-machines to fight monsters which are referred to as angels. It’s got deep characters, a creative story, and is probably the most well directed show I’ve ever seen. The ending infamously fell apart due to production problems, so there’s a movie called The End of Evangelion to conclude the story. It’s a very disturbing arthouse movie, so watch out for that, but the show as a whole is moooosssstly more straightforward and fascinating, This is an absolute must watch. (26 eps and 1 movie)

1. Baccano!

Baccano! takes place in 1930s New York, and is about thieves, gangsters, criminals, terrorists, alchemists, and immortals interacting in this nonlinear comedy/action thrill ride. I felt like I was on a rollercoaster while watching this show. It’s the perfect blend of action, comedy, romance, drama, horror, and creative storytelling. It’s fantastic to rewatch since the first episodes barely make any sense without context (but are still an absolute joy to watch). It’s got great characters and it’s a great story. Go watch it. And then watch it again. (13 eps and 3 OVAs)

That’s it for this list! Check out my MAL page for more recommendations if you’re interested and have a great night!

#neon genesis evangelion #hunter x hunter #fmab #higurashi no naku koro ni #trigun #flcl #princess tutu #baby steps #paranoia agent #baccano!#not kuro

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fallenradioblog · 7 years ago

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KINGDOM HEARTS 3

So yet again Square Enix hinted at Kingdom Hearts 3 being released within 2018. During last year audiences including myself where mesmerised by the latest ‘Toy story Based Trailer’ which left most fans wondering whether the new instalment will finally be delivered to fans in the new year. The company recently retweeted from Square Enix USA on the 10th of January stating, “Dragon Quest! Kingdom Hearts! Check out @destructoid’s most anticipated games of 2018 and let us know what games you’re looking forward to”. The original source when through all games expected to release this year, including titles below; Witchfire, Mega Man 11, Dragon Quest XI: Echoes of an Elusive Age, Valkyria Chronicles 4, No Truce with the Furies, Scorn, Red Dead Redemption 2, Super Robot Wars X, Monster Hunter: World, Invisible, Shovel Knight: Battle Mode, God of War, Necrobarista, Bloodstained: Ritual of the Night, Kentucky Route Zero, Shadow of the Colossus/ Travis Strikes Again: No more Heroes and of course Kingdom Hearts 3. Now again after researching this even more, a final date still hasn’t been given. Which taking into consideration that this is Square Enix, isn’t very surprising. Audiences including myself have been waiting years for the game to come out of development and onto our screens. In a report on Playstationslifestyles.net they reinforce the factor that ‘A year is a long time though, and without a definite date, or even a narrower window, fans have the understandable fear that the kingdom 3 will actually again get pushed’. Now to 2019. But as a dedicated fan of the series I hope for better.

For anyone following along who hasn’t heard of Square Enix, well beloved baby called Kingdom Hearts, the new instalment Kingdom Hearts 3 will be it’s twelfth instalment in the Kingdom Hearts Story. Sequel to Kingdom Hearts 2 and the closing chapter to the Dark Seeker saga. Set after the events of Kingdom Hearts 3D Dream Drop Distance, which you may remember as it was one of the games that was remade within Kingdom Hearts HD II.8 released on the 12th of January 2017. That game, was completely remastered, featuring heavy improvements to the graphic’s quality along with various UI and control changes to make the switch from the 3DS to the PS4. In the game Dream Eaters were also made to be a little less aggressive, which fans picked up on, however this didn’t turn them away from the experience or the gameplay. At least not for me. Although with the lack of information in some areas the dev’s have made up for in others.

We know that the gameplay in Kingdom Hearts 3 will be similar to it predecessors, the director of the company, Tetsuya Nomura, informed us that the combat would be along the lines of the Kingdom Hearts 2, with an evolution like what was discovered from Kingdom Hearts to Kingdom Hearts 2. Nomura noted that new gameplay elements are the “skeleton” of the games, saying “When creating Kingdom Hearts game, we start with a gameplay system that I think would be a fun element, and once we have an idea of what kind of gameplay or system we want in place we flesh out the story around it, surrounding the basic concept of what kind of fun we’re going to have with this new instalment”. Obviously, Sora will return as the main playable character in the party join by Donald Duck and Goofy, with the ability to have two additional characters join the party, for a total then of five. Were they will go on a face on the Heartless as well as the Nobodies. The enemy AI is a lot more intricate too. We have been told that Sora will once again perform magic, a new powerful tier of each spell available. Most like Aqua in Birth by Sleep: A fragmentary Passage however unlike that game I would love the latest game in the series to take me more than a couple of hours to complete.

The reason some audience believe that the game has been pushed longer than expected is due to the worlds featured in the game. Again, based on Disney properties it’s been expected to include more modern settings such as Tangled-themed Kingdom of Corona, the Big Hero 6 themed San Fransokyo (Which is defiantly the most desirable to me) and Toy Story, clearly from the trailers. As well as thought of returning worlds re-appearing, such as the Hercules-themed Olympus and Mysterious Tower.

But what you really want to know is the main story line, continuing from Dream Drop Distance, Sora, Donald, and Goofy will attempt to search for seven guardians of light and the “Key to Return Hearts”, while King Mickey and Riku search for the previous Key blade wielders, to stop Master Xehanort’s plan to balance the light and darkness, which may ultimately lead to the final showdown between Sora and Master Xehanort. By the start of the game, Sora has completed his Mark of Mastery, which he was attempting to do at the end of Dream Drop Distance.

Kingdom Hearts III will serve as the concluding chapter of the “Dark Seeker/Xehanort” saga. Nomura also added that the plot will examine the seven lights and thirteen darkness’s coming together for the ultimate battle, but everyone expected to fulfil these roles may not.

Knowing all this, me and fans everywhere are basically screaming at Square Enix to have this game released by the seasonal period if not earlier even though chances are slim. I know personally I can’t wait to experience the new worlds and battle again alongside my Disney co-workers. But what about everyone else. What is the most exciting aspect from Kingdom Hearts 3 that has you hocked? Is the duration of waiting of the games actual release lost your interest? Or is a game I stated before more desirable to fans?

It would be great to hear other’s thoughts.

#kingdom hearts #kingdom hearts 3 #kingdom #hearts #square enix #blog #blog entry #discussion #Disney #anime #video games #games #news updates #2018 games #update #Long Reads #blogger

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moonlitoutpost · 7 years ago

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A Year of Games - 2017

It’s a new year! So why not get in on the action and recount the year previous, the last 12 moon cycles, just like everyone else with a top of the top’s list. They’re a fun way to catch up on things and stuff that may have slipped through the cracks, a shorthand, basically just cheating off your friend’s answers before a test. But there is no test, and we didn’t study either.

Having recently read through some great lists ourselves, we thought we’d write our own! Below are a few of our favorite games that we have played in 2017. These choices are unique in that they are not limited to the calendar year, more of things that we played during it :)

1. Summon Nights 5

Summon Nights 5 is a beautiful mix of bewitching artwork, endearing story, and sharp gameplay. An addicting brew of a finely sculpted battle system and lackadaisical leisure. For us, it was our dark horse of the year, an unexpected upsetter in the roster of contenders. A last minute entry, bought/purchase on a whim, that went on to rise it’s way to the top, as our game of the year.

Right out of its lush packaging, its mysterious and decked out box held our stare long before we officially put the cartridge in. And somehow after this, we were instantly hooked! The game initially was released in 2013 yet thanks to this english translation, we were able to enjoy the adventure in its full glory. It’s always our pleasure to encounter a sleeper hit that seems to have almost criminally gone under the radar. Most likely by happenstance, the graphics reminded us of a really sharp DreamCast game, and that only makes us like it even more ;)

Though the game’s scope isn’t massive, what is in view, is satisfying and rather comes off as quite focused. The amount of systems that they have given you to play with are so rewarding and joyfully exhausting when you really get a handle on them. Slyly unfolding an intricate depth when it comes to the combat, and conducted by a brilliant understanding of pacing.

If it were a candy: Summon Nights would be a rich nuggety strategic RPG, wrapped in the light airyness of a visual novel. A charming game from top to bottom, we can’t wait to play more in this series!

2. Asura’s Wrath

A game that offers no moderation, no holds barred, takes no prisoners, and leaves nothin’ on the table. Asura’s Wrath deals in grander rather than subtlety. It’s not often that a game’s vibe can be considered timeless, but strangely enough Asuras Wrath by all account balances that idea of strange classical timelessness and pull no punches insanity. Every passing moment in it was just a new trip to revel in, as we blissfully savored every second.

It’s one of those oddities that you could say is by definition less than a ‘game’, but more than a movie. It’s an experience worth having. A power nouveau of uninhabited ideas, truly one in a million.

3. Fortnite

If PUBG is the hard-R inescapable action flick of the summer, then Fortnite is the Saturday-morning cartoon spinoff complete with its own tie-in sugar-soaked cereal and line of action figures: some assembly required!

It’s fast, it’s frantic, it’s flashy, it’s vibrant! Mad-dash blitzing our way to surviving 98 other players has been a theme for us this year. While many multi-player games left victories ringing hollow, in Fortnite, the highs have never felt higher! Every moment has its own risks and rewards, with juuuust the right amount of luck sprinkled on top. Bang! Your team suddenly clashes head to head with another. You’re well stocked, but you could be better off. Shots are fired. Your team walks away from the fight - but just barely. Your emerging status to win has now been cut severely. It’s these calculated risks that makes the game more exciting! If you take them, you could come out worse for wear. But with a similar roll of the dice…you could come out king. And that has the potential to be in every fight, with the lasting effects rippling through the rest of the match.

We don’t know if we’ve felt like anything like this in any other multiplayer game. That’s what we like about it, and that’s where the best moments come from. from the hijinks of playing together and with friends, and the moments where it comes down to the wire, clawing your way to win an extreme underdog victory: it’s just a great flow!

Every match of Fortnite gives you the prospect to come away with a story. For many games it is often promised but rarely accomplished. However this is one that actually feels like it.

4. Hamtaro: Ham-Ham Heartbreak

The Gameboy is one of our most beloved systems, home to many of our all-time favorite games. Within its unassuming enclosure, there are many unique treasures and exciting surprises. This game is definitely one of them. If you are already familiar with the Hamtaro universe, you’ll recognize the perfect mix of adventure and adorability. If not though, get ready to embark on a game that is expressive, immersive and above all, heartwarming!

In this low-key adventure game you get to experience the world as the pint-size of a hamster. There’s a particular feeling it offers. Something about being shrunk down, tiny, a miniature evergladen, roaming through a world of macro amalgamations. You might say there’s an air of nearby secrets, or a peaceful openness, and this game lends to that atmosphere with a beautifully rendered playground of pixels. And like any fun adventure game, surprises are hidden behind every corner, making you want to poke and prod at everything in the world.

The pastel color palette is really pleasing and the art style is loose and free. Everything has so many different expressions and reactions to things, it really brings out the character, and goes a long way in tying the experience together. The animated Hamtaro show translates really well to the game, we found that like ‘wow, they captured it perfectly!’ Everything from the vibe to the design, is like you’re dropped into an episode of the anime itself!

In a world where so many recent visual novels and adventures games come with choices that hold the balance of life and death on the line, sometimes it’s nice to stop and smell the roses *hiff hiff*

No hamster will remember your choice..and that’s nice!

5. Persona 5

A long-awaited sequel to one our favorite JRPGS, Persona 5 improves on everything when it comes to the mechanics and the style of its predecessor. From the killer score to the fleshed-out battle system, a lot of it feels just grand! Each change that was introduced seemed to galvanize the strengths of previous work. It often feels like a combination of many smart changes and improvements, such as but not limited to: more meaningful fights, memorable dungeons/dungeon themes, more realized stealth mechanics, a more robust velvet room, increased save points, the addition of Momentos, more locations to visit, more interesting side quests, and more recreational activities than you have time in a day. The boss fights were super creative, leaps and bounds above what they had already laid out in 4. Dungeons feel like places, no longer just randomized tile sets of pre-fab pieces, making progressing through feel more significant.

For as many good things as we have to say about it, the experience is not without flaw. While it comes out hot at the gate, a long-winded pacing only serves to fatigue its excellence and only lessens the verocity of the latter half of the game. Going hand in hand with this, while it comes down to personal preference, both the story and characters, minus a few standouts, didn’t resonate with us as nearly as much as their Persona 4 counterparts. These two things combined made the final stretch in this feel more laborious and really made us wonder if dropping a dungeon or 20 hours would have made for a tighter experience. There is an art form to knowing when to end something. While it might be more evolutionary than revolutionary, Persona 5 is still one of the best RPG’s we’ve played in recent memory. It’s almost a compliment to say how hard it is to top yourself and how big an act Persona 4 is to follow. :)

Special Shoutouts:

1. Pocket Camp: We never played New Leaf, We Never Got to be mayor, we never got to design our own town, and we never got the 3DS. But we’re absolutely infatuated with Animal Crossing. This latest addition to the series is definitely an enjoyable one. It’s a little less full-featured, but you still get to interact with a motley crew of cute animals, and make that perfect decorating vision, and that’s just enough of a hit to stave off the encroaching cold grip of death before losing consciousness. It may not see like a big deal to people who cut their teeth in New Leaf, but for those who have missed their home away from home, Pocket Camp gave us just enough of a familiar taste of milk and honey, without the rule of a tyrannical higher power lording over you with monetary conflict..oh wait a minute…

2. HQ: Late last year we learned about a novel little app that changed our schedule completely. Twice a day we found ourselves dropping everything we did to pull out our phone in an attempt to win fabulous cash prizes. Whether it was calling live streams to halt, sneaking glances at it during work, or loosing track of time in public. Assembling the crew, nearby friends, anyone who would listen, in a huddle trying to remember what the progenitor of the Oreo was. (it’s the Hydrox cookie by the way).

HQ is the realization of a dream most people have, of being a contestant on a game show, all while being strangely futuristic. It’s more than an app, it’s a fun social drip of spontaneity.

3. Paragon: the game we spent the single most time with this year, We were interested in it more from an academic point than anything, and that eventually progressed into kind of liking it. We’ve played it a lot, and have had some pretty crazy moments, including a surprising amount of meeting new people while playing it. Even going as far as stumbling into seeing ourselves in someone else’s gameplay footage! :) It’s been the best year in our opinion for released heroes, and there have been many improvements both big and small. A lot of design choices still require smoothing out, but we feel it’s come a long way since then.

Due to very recent events, its days have now become numbered. Rumors had been swirling in the under realm for the past few weeks, and its future was pulled into question. Now with this latest announcement, the final nails have been put in the coffin. It’s sad to see a game with such promise pulled before the broadstokes really got all the details. A bit abrupt, though if you were literate it wouldn’t be hard to make out the writing on the walls. While it didn’t cast as towering a shadow as its contemporaries, its unique presence in the world of MOBAS will surely be missed.

This is actually the third time we’ve come back and written this last paragraph specifically. As news of Paragon’s decaying state were raised, we came back to re-amend it, each iteration getting a little more bleak, up until posting it today, having moments ago, with a tinge of morose irony, just finished filling out a refund form. So now that the final word has been given, now we’re here: as opposed to looking forward, we’re instead forced to look back.

New beginnings and new ends, the textbook definition of a new year

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laneybug926 · 5 years ago

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I wrote this blog a while ago on my wordpress site. However, considering our period of quarantine, I figured this would be fun to share here. Please do not take offense if you happen to disagree with my thoughts for they are only my opinion and what do I know🤷🏼‍♀️.

The Sims Evolution

Disclaimer: Originally I was planning on sharing my thoughts on worthiness and some pretty emotional things. However, I chose to write about something kind of silly this week and share my thoughts on the evolution of my most favorite game. I hope you enjoy! Also I do not own the Sims franchise or any of these pictures/characters/names of games. All copyright goes to The Sims©.

It happened one day while out shopping with my family. Before the days of product keys, instant downloads, and torrents, many stores had rows and rows of computer games. Stuffed into boxes with colorful graphics of game play, they usually contained a disk(or several) and a lengthy user manual on how to install/play the game. As little me browsed the different titles, my eyes fell upon a very unique looking game. A game where you more or less played God creating families, houses, and controlled how they went about their lives. As a young aspiring storyteller, I knew this would be the perfect game for me and thus my obsession with The Sims began.

The Sims 1: The beginning of a new era.

The Sims 1 has a very special place in my heart. Not only was it the catalyst to some of the best and sometimes worst decisions of my life, it was unique and had a lot of charm to it. I remember the days when it was like roulette trying to get it to work on my old desktop 'games' computer. Due to all of the space it took to work, very often it'd load and then freeze. Occasionally when it did decide to work, you felt like we cheated the Gods of gaming and played very carefully.

Looking back, perhaps the graphics aren't great, but for the time it was amazing. Where else could you customize people and build houses? Where else could you 'try for baby' just by kissing? Where else did you miss the carpool to work and ended up getting fired? Where else could Mort Goth be a secret agent and be living with his assassin of a wife Bella? And this all happened before expansion packs came out and added more dimension to it. I used to love taking my couples to town using 'Hot Date' and being able to creepily micromanage their date by going into the restaurant with them. I used to love turning my ex into a frog via 'Makin Magic'. And who could forget when Drew Carey would crash super epic parties via 'House Party'. Sims 1 was very new to it's kind and while basic, it laid the foundation for the next 20 years to come.

Sims 2- My sister's favorite

I feel horrible saying this, but of the four games, I remember playing this one the least. I do remember playing it occasionally, but far less than my little sister. By the time we bought it, my little sister was old enough to start playing and take up precious computer time. Even though I didn't play it much, I do remember that it was far superior compared to it's predecessor. The overall graphics and customization of sims and lots was awe-aspiring. The sims actually had personalities, turn ons/turn offs, and could actually age. This set the scene for some legendary Dynasties. In addition, we received expansion pack after expansion pack and occasionally stuff packs to flesh out our game playing. I do remember having University, Seasons, and Pets, but that's about it. It was a lot of fun to play with cars, jobs, hobbies, pets, survival items and changing weather. Some faithful Simmers even insist that this was the best version of Sims of all time. Would you agree? Let me know.

Sims 3- Bigger could be better

As a writer and 'simmer', the one thing I didn't like about Sims 2 was the lack of hair customization. I'd often like to make likenesses of my story characters and sadly I was stuck with the five(or six) 'normal' hair colors. I guess the Gods of Games listened to my prayers, because Sims 3 fixed all of that. You want to make a character with pink and purple hair? Go ahead. You want a character who only wears leopard print EVERYTHING? It's done. One would think that having a big brother like Sims 2 would be kind of intimidating. Nope. Sims 3, in my opinion, was the best in it's ability to customize literally everything using a color wheel, patterns, and even stamps on dogs(if you're into that). You could micromanage and customize everything. This was not only the case with the sims creation, but the whole world opened up and you could creepily follow your sims everywhere. This game robbed me of my hard earned teenage/early adulthood money due to all of it's great expansions and exciting game play. Want to make a faerie witch who turns the world into zombies? Want to take it easy and ride a house boat around the sim world? Want to climb the celebrity ladder and play for millions? Want to exchange a kiss under the mistletoe with your next door neighbor crush? You can do all of that in the Sims 3 and far more. Most of, if not all, some of my great story ideas and characters came from this game right here. I have some of the best memories playing this game such as my Greyer dynasty that literally took over the neighborhood and/or telling stories via the capture the moment feature. Yes it had it's glitches and at times it would take 20 minutes to load a saved game, but it was worth it. I wasted so much time living vicariously through the lives of little digital people that I woke up and I'm suddenly 30 years old. Just kidding, as easy as it was to get hooked, I'd like to think I had a healthy work/life/play balance. You'd think they'd keep making expansions or even stop after the success of Sims 3. Nope, within a blink of an eye the sims team announced that they were creating Sims 4. What more could they possibly bring?

Sims 4-

I’m sure you've heard the saying 'quit while you're ahead'. Unfortunately the sim team didn't and we were given the Sims 4. With promises of multi-tasking and emotions, fans of the game, such as myself, had high expectations and sadly we were very disappointed. I do remember when the demo came out that I installed it, played around, and uninstalled it with a disappointed groan. In retrospect, I might have been a bit too harsh and have since given it a chance. Maybe it's due to me being older and not having as much time to waste, but it's nice to play in low doses. Unlike Sims 3, it's frustratingly difficult to create dynasties, you cannot create at least a family by family picture story, no open worlds to explore, and there is no more color wheel/customization. The good things...well there are less 'rabbit hole' locations, with mods I can make it more exciting, I do like the sims interactions with each other, and I guess multitasking. Seriously, the best thing about Sims 4 is all of the mods and custom content that has corrupted my game in the greatest way. I do like to play this game for silliness purposes and usually don't expect to have meaningful game play. On a side note Sims Discover University expansion just came out and it's been proclaimed by sims experts that it's by far the best Sims 4 expansion. Perhaps they will continue moving in that direction and learn from their successes.

In conclusion, the Sims franchise acted as a intricate part of my childhood and has lasted far into my adulthood to inspire new characters and stories. Seriously folks, at least 60% of my story ideas have started out with just a simple PC game. Moral of the story; not all video and computer games are harmful and useless. Everything in moderation, drink lots of water, remember self care, and you'll be just fine kids.

#thesims #simmer #sims stuff #sims series #simstagram #sim related #the sims gameplay #the sims 4 #the sims 1 #the sims 2 #the sims 3 #the sims four #the sims review #the sims story

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houseofvans · 8 years ago

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Art School | Q&A w/ Andy Kehoe (PA)

We’ve been following the magical and mystical works of Pittsburgh based artist Andy Kehoe for some time, and we’re excited to have him for our latest Art School Q & A. Through his own unique visual language, Kehoe creates mesmerizingly imaginative and otherworldly places where his mysterious inhabitants venture into mystical interactions with the “awe and grandeur of nature.” We chatted with this brush wielding wizard on various topics from his upcoming show at Thinkspace gallery, his process of creating some of these resin layered works to how he recently delved into the world of Magic the Gathering!

Photographs courtesy of the artist

Hey Andy, tell us a little about yourself.

I’m just your typical run of the mill Korean/German/Irish-American trying to survive the mean streets of Pittsburgh with nothing but luscious head of hair, a foolish dream, and a sharp knife that thirsts for the blood of my enemies.

In non-wise ass terms, I’m an artist that lives and works in Pittsburgh, PA. I share my house/studio with my lovely, awesome wife, Ash, and our insufferable furry children comprised of one dog, Gizmo, and three cats, Gremmy, Sir, and Mia.

Last year is finally over, what were some of the highlights? What were your favorite projects or shows?

I had an absolutely insane year of art making in 2016. It started in June with my most recent solo show, Fantastical Romanticism, at Jonathan LeVine Gallery. That was immediately followed by 3 group shows in the Fall. Then came the holidays, which are always a super hectic time for me with print sales and the usual holiday madness. It’s safe to say that 2016 was the busiest year of my life and, though it was very rewarding, I was glad to see it come to an end.

My LeVine show was definitely a career high point for me. I put so much work into that show so it was great to see it all come together in the end. I wanted the show to be big and super detailed, so that added up to many sleepless nights. And man, was it down to the wire. I had so much going on in the last month and I remember looking at my notes and my crazy person dry erase board thinking, “My god…What have I done? How the holy hell am I going to pull this off?.” After fighting back the urge to violently vomit and weep, I just had to take it step by step and hope for no unforeseen delays. When working on multiple pieces at once, my goal is to get all of them to a point in which I’m comfortable I can finish them in the last month of work. So when a piece is pretty close to completion, I’ll put the piece aside and focus on those that need more attention. Usually, a large majority of the pieces get finished in the process.

For this show, I had to keep bouncing between pieces and almost all of them needed to be finished in the last few weeks. It was an intricate and chaotic act of juggling to get them all done in time. I’m still unsure of how I actually pulled it off.

Any new and cool places you haven’t shown that you got to show at?

I also got to show some original work in Australia for the first time which was a real highlight. It was a smaller group show at Outré Gallery in Melbourne. I got to share the gallery with the super talented Femke Hiemstra. How cool is that? It seems like I have a surprisingly strong following in Australia. In fact, almost half my print orders these days get shipped to Australia, which is unbelievable. Thanks Australia! My show there sold out and I’m hoping this leads to another bigger show and an eventual journey to Oz.

What a truly insane year for you, so how is 2017 shaping up? I know you mentioned you have a new show at Thinkspace coming up. What can you tell us about it?

I started 2017 by taking time, collecting my tattered wits, and beginning the process of catching up on every other aspect of my life that I had neglected during the art making fury of 2016. It’s crazy how much of your life will fall behind when you’re deep into the final stages of a show.

Now I’m working out some of my initial concepts and prepping a bunch of panels for the Thinkspace show in September 2017. My last show with Thinkspace was in Miami for the Art Basel fair madness, so this will be my first show at the actual gallery in five years. I’m excited to come visit the LA area again. The show opens on September 30th, so if you’re in the area, stop by! (We will!)

What’s your process like for creating concepts for your shows?

The beginning of a show is all about trying to wrangle some strange, loose ideas out of the ether and wrestle them into some form of practicality. I spend most of this time with headphones on, staring at a blank, freshly gessoed panel while mulling over those concepts until something starts to form. Seeing the blank space where the painting will be helps me visualize the idea. It’s pretty amazing how deep and detailed your mind can get when you focus and concentrate hard enough. Maybe this could be considered some weird form of meditation. There was a time where I felt pretty guilty about spending a whole day just staring and thinking and jotting down random ideas. Now I know this is a step in the weird process I have for making my work.

Once the paintings start to take shape, I’ll finally reach a point where I can dedicate hours to straight painting. Then it’s on to listening to a whole lot of audio books and podcasts.

How many audio books / podcasts did you burn through for your last show?

For my last show at Jonathan LeVine, I listened to upwards of 20 books in six months. I listen to a smattering of contemporary fiction and nonfiction, but the largest portion of my reading/listening belongs to the Fantasy & Sci-Fi genre. These stories are world building in written form and listening to them never ceases to stoke and inspire my own imagination.

When you are working on your various pieces - do you work on them start to finish or several paintings at a time? How do you manage it all?

As for my process, I always work on several pieces at once so there is no down time while pieces are drying. The beginning of a show is the toughest part for me. Trying to flesh out a dozen ideas and then plan out the different layers for each individual painting can be overwhelming.

I have a big dry erase board that looks like something your conspiracy theorist uncle would have hidden away in his tool shed in the woods. I use it to keep track of what layer I am working on with each piece, and for little notes about possible techniques and concepts that can be utilized. I also have a sketch book that has my initial concept sketches along with lot of notes. One thing I know about myself is I need to sketch and write ideas down or it’ll likely be lost in the void for all time. When you make a living off of your ideas, it’s of paramount importance to record them when they come. Inspiration can hit at the strangest times.

Knowing the first layer will be coated in resin and set for all eternity can make me a bit hesitant to jump right into a piece. Painting the first stroke is always the hardest thing for me. I’m not sure why there is no much trepidation on my part, but I need enough of a resolved concept before I can jump in. To keep my sanity during the first stages, I’ve learned to keep it kind of loose conceptually and to let the painting form in a more organic way. Many times I paint the background and decide to change the placement or scale of a character, or to alter the original composition completely. Sometimes, when the world starts to build up and materialize, I’ll see something else inhabiting that landscape so I’ll readjust and change the piece accordingly. Some of my favorite paintings come from lending fresh eyes to an incomplete piece and being willing to go a different direction with it. Working with the resin kind of lends itself to that way of thinking, since you have so much time in between each layer. But at the same time you have to make a final decision because, once the resin is poured, there is no going back. That finality can be really daunting, but being forced to make a decision and move on is very helpful for me.

Has your technique with working with resin changed or evolved?

I am continuously experimenting and evolving that technique. For my most recent work, I started working with less layers and moving toward making my resin pieces less deep. The resin itself has become more of a painting tool for me. The paint effects and textures that I can achieve with the epoxy resin are why I love working with it, more so than the depth effect that initially drew me to it. There is certainly still a great deal of depth in the final product, but I don’t want that to be the primary focus of the work. I’ll still be doing some deep pieces to incorporate sculptural elements but, for the most part, I’ll be treating them more like traditional paintings.

How about traditional painting? Do you still find yourself working w/ oil and acrylic?

Speaking of traditional paintings, I’ve also been getting back into straight oil and acrylic paintings which has been very gratifying. I forgot how much I missed the opportunity to go back and work on the background. It’s been interesting to take all the lessons I’ve learned from working in layers of resin and applying them to a more traditional medium.

In your works, your dreamy and magical environments are very much characters themselves. What aspect do the landscapes / dreamy realms play in your paintings and/or in your imaginary worlds?

The world itself is, in many ways, the most important aspect of my work and what I think about the most on a day to day basis. The awe and grandeur of nature is a prevalent theme for me and one of my greatest inspirations. Because I work in resin layers and work back to front, the vast majority of my pieces naturally start with the background. These nascent steps into the environment are the first thing I have to plan out and are the first elements of the piece to get fleshed out. The development of the initial background layer effects the direction of the entire piece.

There is a symbiotic relationship between the characters and the environment. The characters tend to be products of their environment and many times the environment is physically part of the character. This is sometimes apparent in the patterns of the clothes they are wear or maybe by the surrounding fauna actually growing on them. This harmony is an overarching theme for me, but a lot of that also has to do with the technical process of making the piece. As the world builds, the characters enter and evolve with the painting and the world gets more and more defined.

What’s something you think people might not know about an artist or mostly about what you do as an artist?

Being an artist and working for yourself is, of course, very gratifying. But, it also has much of the mundanity of running a small business. There is rarely a day when I get to wake up and just be creative and paint all day. I feel like there is a romanticized notion of an artist rolling out of bed, smoking a joint in his/her paint-spattered bathrobe, and being manically creative in the studio all day. While that’s true some days, most of my days are filled with emails (which I was bad about and now I’m getting worse), print shop issues, inventory, book keeping, and general life duties. These are truly mundane tasks, but you need to utilize every tool you can to sustain yourself in this crazy line of work.

What would you say to folks who want to walk down the art path? 'Abandon hope all ye who enter?’ or ‘Jump into the Fire’ ?

Be patient and create as much as you can. It takes a lot of time and a lot creating to come into your own in terms of technique and overall artistic purpose. Seriously, just make work. A lot of work. Making piece after piece is the only true way to refine your vision and help you determine what and why you want to create. Never stop challenging yourself, learn from each piece, and try to carry those lessons forward.

Share your work as much as you can. The internet is a powerful tool and your work can reach parts of the world you would never imagine. My following in Australia didn’t come from a huge exhibition or an article in a major arts publication. It came people seeing and sharing my work on the internet.

Getting the opportunity to showcase your work is usually the hardest and most frustrating part for aspiring artists. There is no set way to do it. So if and when you get that opportunity, make it count and take full advantage.

Also, don’t let “making it in the art world” be your top motivation for creating.

In terms of art, what are things you admire or appreciate when you go to someone else’s show or view another fellow artists’ pieces?

I’m always drawn to work that is imaginative and genuine. I appreciate attention to detail and an overall care for the work. You can tell when someone really cares for their work and wants it to be the best representation of their particular artistic vision.

Technical prowess and craft is something I admire immensely, and something I strive for myself, but it has to be a whole package of vision and mood. I love work with a sense of mystery that can evoke a feeling of wonder and awe. I want to be able to stare at a piece and get lost in it for a time.

How do you stay balanced with art and non-art activities?

All of my current non-art activities are intertwined and share a mutual need: A need for actual human interaction. (Besides finally getting to indulge in some long desired interests.)

It’s easy to get wrapped up in adult shit. Work shit, wife’s school shit, house-work shit, all sorts of errands and shit. Lots of shit nonstop all of the time. When you work in a home studio, your personal life and your work life coexist in the same place. Unsurprisingly, it can all start to melt together and become your whole world. When you go to a day-to-day job, even if you despise some of your coworkers, at least you get to see other people in a different space out there in the real world. My coworkers are a dog and 3 cats. Though they do get up to some crazy things and the studio is full of tantalizing gossip, there is a definite void of human contact. It is always crazy to essentially work alone for months and then get thrown into the chaos of an art opening. Suddenly, I am surrounded by an overwhelming amount of people wanting to ask me about my work. Basically, something needed to change before I became an unsociable recluse.

Definitely can see that, so how do you un-wind after a full studio day?

After working all day, I typically hang out with friends virtually via video games, but I really needed something tangible. So I started a board game day and got a group of friends to join me at my house and it was marvelous and fun. I love board games. My favorites are Betrayal at House on the Hill, Lords of Waterdeep, and most recently, Scythe.

Then I decided to take it up a notch and start a D&D campaign with those friends. I’ve always wanted to get back into D&D and I figured the best way to do it was to learn the new 5e version, become a DM, and start the whole damn thing myself. One thing about me is when I decide to get into something, I get pretty obsessive and go all in. I spent every second of free time researching it and learning all the rules. I learned to make charts and tables in MS Word and Excel so I could produce a whole laminated quick reference guide binder for all my players. Having a large format printer also came in pretty handy as I was able to make huge maps for the all the places I would be taking them. It turns out having a strange imagination and a deep love of trolling your friends is a good recipe for being a successful DM. Making stories is a lot fun for me and having those stories played out by your creative and somewhat twisted friends is super rewarding… and super hilarious. The tales I could tell of these adventurers and their deeds would make an bugbear blush. I still think of them every once in a while and chuckle to myself.

Dude I love it, you went deep into gaming. Last time we emailed, you mentioned you were competing in Magic the Gathering. How did that all come about?

Having friends over for those activities was fine and awesome, but I still wasn’t leaving the comfort of my familiar confines. So, a little over a year ago, I started playing Magic the Gathering and I’ve become a bit obsessed. It’s something I’ve always wanted to explore. I love card games and love the art attached to the game. The gameplay itself involves a lot of strategy and improvisation which I find mentally rewarding. I love that there’s so much personalization when it comes to crafting a deck and people can play it so many different ways.

And, very importantly, it gets me out of the studio and I get to meet new people and have some real human contact outside of my familiar studio/cat world. The Magic community has been very gracious and inviting to am aspiring player such as myself, and I really appreciate that.

Any other non-art activities you’re looking forward too?

I hope to start traveling a bit more in the coming years. My wife Ash has been in school for the last 4 years getting her Doctorate and she graduates this year! Hurray! She will be a nurse practitioner with a much better schedule. She’s had to continue working as a critical care nurse while also completing a massive workload for school, so besides being a total badass, her schedule has been far from flexible. We definitely love to travel and I look forward to our many future adventures together.

What’s the best art related advice you’ve ever gotten? What wisdom can you share with folks?

The best advice I ever got in regards to work was from my Illustration Concepts teacher at Parsons, Jordin Isip. Well, he gave me a lot of good advice over those 2 years, but the one that especially resonated was his advice on building a visual language.

In the Illustration department, every one of us was pretty obsessed with what our unique “style” was, and what would set our work apart from all the other illustrators out there. This is obviously a ubiquitous issue with Illustration students, so Jordin addressed this concern right away.

Right, aspiring artists are still concerned with finding their own style. What did he say?

Essentially, he told us to not concern ourselves so much with where we’d end up in terms of our style, but to take a little bit from each piece we make and start to build a unique visual language. You start small with letters and words and build up to sentences and paragraphs. Eventually you’ll be speaking your own visual language fluidly with more and more elegance. I think that’s a great way to look at it, and it really worked for me. I still continue to follow that lesson to this day since it’s something that will always continue to evolve and grow.

How about the worse given?

I’ve been wracking my brain over some horrible advice I’ve gotten over the years, and I honestly can’t think of any that really stick out. Even if it’s bad advice, it’s usually well intentioned and not something to take personally.

Okay, completely switching subjects, what are your FAVORITE Vans?

I love the classic look for the laced and slip ons. Plain with no stripe.

Finally, any last words, shout outs, and/or random words of wisdom?

I just want to thank you guys for reaching out and giving me the chance to spew my nonsense!

Website | Instagram | Facebook | Shop

#vans #vans art #andy kehoe #q&a #painters #visual #resin #studio

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noiseartists · 5 years ago

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DAY & DREAM (USA): Shoegaze duo extraordinaire

Day & Dream is a Shoegaze / Indie band from Ashville in North Carolina. They propose a clever and finely chiseled music, full of clever musical twists.

I listened to their album several times, and while the make up seems, at first listen, quite standard, they cleverly included unexpected sounds, like the jazz keyboard on ‘With Every Breath You Die’, and tinkered happily with the genre’s sound and dynamics. Every listen will uncover new layers … not a common occurrence.

I like the first song and its title: ‘So it begins’ (a sentence that I use often) and its Dream Pop atmosphere, totally unlike the rest of the album, almost like an inside Joke. When ‘Night lights’ starts with a Cure-like bassline, the band display what will be listened to in the album: intricate musical layers bordering on the lo-fi, Abby’s beautiful high-pitched voice, slight dissonance that avoid an ‘easy-listening’ song, feet-taping melodies. And from there you visit various music landscape, all superbly painted.

Needless to say I love this album. Follow me to discover the band with the presentation of their music, an interview and more. You will not be disappointed.

DAY & DREAM’s MUSIC

The band’s music work to date is:

2019: With Every Breath You Die, Album; Fading Summer, EP; Hidden Cinema, Single; Chrysalis, Single

2018: Nocturnal Creatures

Here are some of the songs we love:

Abby and Peter, the band members, give us some insight in their music:

Abby: The first thing ever released was the single “Nocturnal Creatures” which is about moving to Asheville from Brooklyn.

Peter: The title of our first album “With Every Breath You Die” was a phrase we heard a homeless man yelling on the street when we lived in New York City. He kept screaming it over and over and we both found it super profound. And true. Good reminder to live in the now and choose what makes you happy, even if it’s hard or scary.

Abby: Then there’s “Fading Summer” which has two new songs and our latest single “Hidden Cinema.” All three of these have more of a lounge/lo-fi vibe with electronic drum beats.

You can find a great review by Mountainsx.com of their album, ‘With Every Breath You Die’, HERE

DAY & DREAM’S INTERVIEW

Who are the group members?

Peter: The core of our band is Abby and myself. We are married and write everything.

Abby: Some shows we play as a duo with an old Ipod. We also play as a full 4-piece band with drums and our buddy Erik on bass.

We have played with a lot of musicians in Asheville and other cities, trying to accommodate everyone’s schedule and adjust for the type of show we are playing. When we started, I think we were dead set on permanent members, but it’s been more realistic this way.

How did you meet?

Abby: Two words - vegan brunch.

Peter: I met Abby in NYC about seven years ago. Later on, we moved to Asheville, NC and met musicians from good ‘ol Craigslist.

How did you come up with your name?

Abby: We had lots of other contenders, but this one felt right. Peter is a morning person, and I am a night owl.

Peter: “Daydream” it’s a common word, we broke it apart and rejoined with an ampersand. Our lives have a polarity to it, yet, we’re joined together by music.

Peter is the day; morning person, grounded and sunny, while Abby is the dream; head in the clouds and dark. Abby came up with the name, at first I wasn’t thrilled about it, but the more I thought about it, I found it to be an accurate representation of us and the music.

What is your music about?

Abby: All sorts of things, diary entries of our life. “First in Flight” is about starting this band, “Nightlights” is about falling in love and losing sense of time and priorities, “Sleepscreaming” is about Peter’s bad dream experiences. “Outside” is an unreleased song about our dog, Zeppi.

We have a lot of material about family, friends/frenemies, and their internal struggles. I do a lot of Stream of Consciousness writing, and sometimes take lyrics from that. I’m also super inspired by children’s books.

What are your goals as an artist artistically/commercially?

Peter: We all have day jobs. It would be amazing to do the band full time and make a living off of it.

Abby: We’d really love to tour/open for one of our favorite bands, and play internationally. It’d be fun to have our music licensed for a commercial or show, and to play a nighttime talk show. That would be the moment we feel we’ve made it. Really, just knowing people enjoy our songs and artistry, that truly does mean the most.

What are you trying to avoid as a band?

Peter: Musical cliches. We try to be different and put our own twist on everything.

Abby: Band drama, drugs, rock n roll. Before a show, we’re not getting smashed. I’m usually doing yoga or in a sauna, and after a show I’m usually eager to go home to snuggle our dog and drink a cup of tea. Grandma rock n roll style for me.

Why do you make the music you make? Is it in you? Is it your environment?

Peter: We both have overactive imaginations. I can’t stop playing guitar and writing songs. Abby is constantly playing piano and singing. It’s totally inside us.

Abby: It can’t be stopped. Music runs deep in my Filipino family, and always comes out in me even when I try to suppress it.

What inspires you for the music or for the Lyrics?

Abby: Nature, travels, life, death, love, pain, humor, all of it - the sweet and salty.

Peter: Sometimes I genuinely don’t know where my ideas come from, they can pop into my head out of nowhere. Other times, I have meditated and slowly ideas and inspiration show up that way. Usually, when I go for a walk or drive, the environment I’m in will present ideas too.

Tell us what you are looking when trying to achieve your sounds. Do you experiment a lot or have a clear idea of what you want?

Peter: We have a lot of material in the bank. For this last album, it became more about which songs from our song bank do we include on the lineup. I personally like many genres of music, but we wanted to keep it focused. That’s why we had our scope be Indie-Rock, Shoegaze and Dream Pop.

Abby: There is a lot of compromise, especially because our musical tastes and backgrounds are so different. We are pretty harsh critics to one another, but I think it’s a good thing for the end result.

Explain your songwriting process.

Peter: It always starts with the music. I’ll spend time contrasting chords and notes together and see where it goes. Usually I’ll flesh that out into a segment -- like a chorus or verse -- once I have enough segments, it’s like assembling pieces to a puzzle. Then, a song is about to be born if all the pieces fit.

Abby will sometimes help with arrangements and deliver a nice melody. We typically write stream-of-conscious style lyrics, and generally prefer to keep the meaning vague.

Abby: Lots of time on the upright piano - lyrics on napkins, books, or jotted on my phone and computer. I’m constantly jotting lines to future songs in random places. Lyrics/melody are pretty quick if I write the music, can be much longer process and challenging if I’m putting lyrics/melody on music Peter wrote.

Describe your palette of sound.

Abby: A favorite fuzzy blanket after a long walk in the forest.

Peter: Lots of reverb. Mainly the vocals, keys and guitar are the most effects heavy. Otherwise the bass and drums are always dry. Abby has switched from Nord to the Mellotron for a more dialed in retro sound, while I love pedals, and use a lot of reverb, distortion, delay, super chorus and flanger.

Who would you want as a dream producer, and why?

Peter: Probably, Nigel Godrich. He’s just produced so many incredible acts that I respect. I think he would easily get our sound too.

Abby: Bjork for her epic elf wisdom!

If you could guest on someone else’s album, who would it be and why? What would you play?

Abby: I’m a huge fan of Melody’s Echo Chamber, Cornelius, Yo La Tengo, Stereolab, Munya, Yumi Zouma, and Jay Som. I’ll contribute in any way they’d have me, backup vocals, tambourine, cowbell, piano.

Peter: Guitar for King Krule. I think I could write a bunch of great riffs for that band. It would also be loads of fun to play guitar in Hum, sometimes you just want to rock out to something low and heavy.

What musical skills would you like to acquire or get better at?

Peter - cello, drums and piano.

Abby - guitar & bass

Is there a band that if they didn’t exist you wouldn’t be making the music you make?

Peter: Would be Nirvana or David Bowie.

What are some places around the world that you hope to play with your band?

Abby: Paris, London, Milan, Copenhagen, Tokyo, Canada, Australia, & New Zealand.

Peter: The same. Would also add Mexico City, São Paulo, Reykjavik, Amsterdam, Berlin, Madrid and Barcelona.

When is the next album/EP due?

Abby: We just released “Hidden Cinema” and have lots of music videos we are working on. We plan on recording some new songs in the spring.

Some artists you recommend.

Abby: A newer band I like is L I P S (England). Also: Say Sue Me, Sweet Trip, The White Shoes and Couples Company, Ducktails, Kikagaku Moyo, Painted Zeros, Men I Trust, Sugar Candy Mountain, No Vacation.

Peter: NIIGHTS, Tape Waves, Toledo, Tennis System, Donny Benét, Palehound, Julia Shapiro, Turnover, RINCS, Lacing, Jay Som

Anything else you want your fans to know?

Abby: We love you!

DAY & DREAM ON THE NET

Their music: Spotify, Bandcamp

Their website: dayanddreamband.com

Their Social Media: Facebook, Instragram Their latest video:

#Day and Dream #Shoegaze #usa

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sinceileftyoublog · 6 years ago

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Ohmme Interview: New Noise

Photo by Alexa Viscius

BY JORDAN MAINZER

Chance the Rapper. Jeff Tweedy. SZA. Richard Thompson. These are all artists you’ve heard, so you’ve certainly heard Sima Cunningham and Macie Stewart of Chicago art rockers Ohmme, who release their debut LP Parts today through Joyful Noise. Now, it’s their time to shine. When they opened for Tortoise at Millennium Park two years ago, they were a different band. For one, they were called Homme--confusion with a Korean pop band of the same name forced them to change to Ohmme. (Cunningham says they’re in a similar situation now; “band names are tough.”) They had also just started with drummer Matt Carroll. Since then, they released a self-titled EP, but Parts is the first expression of who they are as a band. As varied as their collaborators, it’s equally noisy and beautiful, chaotic and melodic. Featuring local experimental artists like reedist Ken Vandermark, cellist Tomeka Reid, and Tortoise’s Doug McCombs, it’s poised to be one of the breakout records of the year.

The band kicks off their tour with an In The Round show at Thalia Hall tomorrow night. (Noise rockers The Hecks and V.V. Lightbody, the project of Chicago experimental folk-pop artist Vivian McConnell, open.) Earlier this month, I spoke to Cunningham about the background and making of the record. She also touched on signing with Joyful Noise and what keeps her optimistic despite the state of the world. Read the interview below, edited for length and clarity.

Since I Left You: Was there anything you hoped to communicate with your debut to the general listening public?

Sima Cunningham: I think we just wanted to make a record that sounded a little bit more like what we sound like live. It’s interesting--I think people have a lot of misconceptions about what our band is and what our band is going to sound like, whether it’s because they look at a picture of us, or they hear, “two guitarists” and make up what Ohmme is. Maybe they’ve listened to one of the songs on the EP but didn’t listen to the whole record. They develop what they think is our entire sound. Usually, when they see us live, they get a completely different idea.

We’re a very dynamic band. We sound like us, like Ohmme, and Ohmme has a distinct sound, but we have sounds that come from all different types of places. We’ve been playing and listening to all kinds of music our whole lives. Our show is more energetic and forceful than people are expecting it to be, so we wanted this record to translate that a bit clearer. The songs kind of came together over a period of a couple months and felt very much like a collection, like they were meant to be together. We love melodies, harmonies, and experimenting with and exploring new noise ideas. We got to achieve a lot of that on this record.

SILY: A song like “Peach” has a prominent loud-quiet-loud dynamic.

SC: That one is really fun. It teeters on the edge of being out of control.

SILY: It’s interesting what you said about emulating the live show. Having seen you a couple years ago--a while ago--and listening to this, I felt the live dynamic and then some. You played “Water” in that set, but this version felt even more fleshed out and distorted than the live performance. Were you trying to build on your live performance with these songs?

SC: When you saw us, that was our second ever performance with a drummer. Our first was at Pitchfork, and our second was that Tortoise show. At that point, we had just made that arrangement. That, and maybe one or two other songs on this record were played around that. We had them and were excited. We only had an EP, so we were pulling in new songs and trying them out. Now, it’s been two years, so some of those songs have evolved a lot live. The timelines get kind of funny because we performed those songs and recorded them a couple months later. Now, we’re still performing those songs, and they’ve evolved live, but the recorded version we recorded a year and a half ago is now coming out. There’s kind of a ping pong effect for what state the listener hears the song in, whether they heard it the first time we played it live, our most recent show. Who knows? You’re hearing the performance of it from a year and a half ago, which is really exciting. It’s particularly nice for those in our hometown of Chicago who got to hear the earliest iteration of those songs.

SILY: How did you go about deciding the sequencing of the tracks?

SC: For a while, we considered sequencing before we recorded but decided that didn’t make sense. Some of the songs needed to come to life in the studio. I think pretty early on it felt like “Icon” was the right song to begin the record and “Walk Me” was the right song to close it. Last fall, we toured out west and had a couple days out in Utah. We camped at the edge of canyons, and I feel like the feeling of looking out over a canyon is the feeling that’s at the end of the record with “Walk Me”. This big, wide open landscape and warm but hollow feeling. Those two felt really obvious. Everything else was just a couple times of listening through and shopping around a couple ideas from people we’re really close with. One of the first things we worked with Joyful Noise on was the sequencing. Karl [Hofstetter], the owner of Joyful Noise, had a strong feeling of how the songs should go. We went back and forth with him a little bit, but it was really cool, because it showed he felt passionately about the music, and this was our first experience working with an outside record label.

SILY: What were some of the factors that led you to sign with them?

SC: Our friend introduced us to Joyful Noise. We love a lot of bands who are on that label, like Surfer Blood and Joan of Arc and WHY? and Deerhoof. We like the fact that they were kind of art house meets rock and really are impassioned about putting out energetic but challenging but enjoyable music. We just met with them and had a really great connection with them right off the bat. We did a couple Jager shots with them when they came to our show in Indy. They came out to our show at Empty Bottle earlier this year. I know some people think, “Oh, who needs labels anymore?” But it’s really nice to have a team of people working on a project together. That’s what this record is. It’s a project, and having a bunch of people around it and support it and make some of the financial pieces come together is really huge for an indie band like us who operate on a very small budget. We have to play a show and work hard for every dollar we get, so it’s nice to have other people invested in the record, and Joyful Noise felt like a natural fit. It didn’t feel like they were into our music for the wrong reasons. They just really liked the music. I’m really excited that came together.

SILY: Have you heard the most recent Yonatan Gat record they released?

SC: Yes! And live. I feel like that’s the cool thing they do with their roster. They have people who put out really intricate records but super slam live.

SILY: You mentioned changing the perception of what Ohmme sounds like. The first time I heard “Icon”, I was wowed by its different elements--the complex time signatures, the squalling guitars, the harmonies. It’s like you were showing your arsenal.

SC: That’s interesting. We definitely don’t want to be masturbatory and showing off. [laughs] But I’m glad it felt like an overture to the record of sorts.

We have friends who make more straight up pop/hip hop music, and to them, our music is super weird. They came to some of our weird Constellation shows early on when we were into more ambient music, leaving a lot of space, more austere. But we have a lot of friends that play very experimental and improvised music, and to them, we’re way further on the pop music spectrum. Some hear us and say, “You’re folk music,” but then folk artists hear us and say, “Oh my god, you guys are like metal heads.” Everyone on the extremes of genres thinks of us as way far away, but generally, people are excited figuring out how to place it in their minds. It gets clearer when people see us live. People who hear the record have one idea of what it’s gonna be, and then they see us live. You really have to see the cover of the book and the inside of the book. Maybe that’s not the best metaphor. [laughs] You want to see the bread and what goes inside the bread to experience the sandwich. The record is a huge important part, but so is seeing us live.

SILY: What came first? The title of the album, or did the song “Parts” come first and you wanted to name the album after it?

SC: What’s funny about the track and the name of the album is that it was called “Parts” on an earlier iteration of that song. We used to have a part in the song that dug in on the word “parts” and repeated it over and over. We ended up moving it out of the song. The place where it was, we decided we liked it better as an instrumental and thought we didn’t need to put vocals over everything. But that song is called “Parts”, and it never changed because that song is so much about the personification of body parts. The song is sung from the body without the mind. We had thought about changing the name of the song for a while, and it never felt right.

It’s weird--sometimes you name the song and it becomes impossible to change it later. That was one of those songs. When we were trying to think of a title for the record, Parts popped out because what I said about that song we process a lot. The individuality of each body part and what that part is saying and feeling as its own entity. It was one of the earliest ones we chose, and then we stuck with it. When it comes to naming things, we try to go with our gut, because overthinking names can be a really arduous process.

SILY: Had you ever worked with Doug McCombs before the record?

SC: No, but he’s a friend, and I had gotten to know the Tortoise guys through the years. I had worked with Jeff Parker before. Me and Jeff have recorded together. I’ve known Doug from around Chicago. He does improvising, and we have a lot of mutual friends. I knew him through some of the Tweedy work I had been doing. We just thought he’d be a fun presence to have in the studio with us and hold us to some of the goals we had set for ourselves. He did exactly that, and it was great.

SILY: There’s one line on “Sentient Beings” that gives it its title: “losing faith in sentient beings.” What inspired you to write that line?

SC: [takes a deep breath] I think it speaks for itself a little bit in the time we live in. Sometimes, you wish there was a doorbell you could ring on people’s minds and hearts that would awaken them to the crazy state of the world we’re living in, that could awaken empathy in them. It’s about the scary side technology brings out in us. People feel like they can be their worst selves inside of technology. Killing fictional people or trolling real people. People’s lives can be ruined through the Internet. That’s a very scary thought for me. Consciousness can be ruined through the Internet through not being able to turn off your brain. Losing the ability to daydream. There’s always a churning, activities you can be doing in your phone. That murders the daydream in a way. That song is kind of about that.

SILY: How do you go about combating that, and what types of things give you a sense of optimism these days?

SC: Oh man. I have a lot of things that give me optimism. I feel like I’m surrounded by the most incredible community in the world. I’m privileged to grow up in a family level with incredible musicians in Chicago. I have this weekend party I’ve been throwing for 11 years. All these people come up: musicians, artists, cooks, friends that own farms in the area, and it’s this huge communal thing. That restores me because I see people I love work so hard and be so creative and pour out love towards each other. It’s like a concentration of all the wonderful things I know exist, and they’re all in the same weekend.

The amazing thing about touring and my life is that I spend tons of time traveling the country and essentially being taken care of by people. People take us in, feed us food, give us beds. They come to our shows, they tell our friends to come to our shows. Touring can be really hard sometimes, and sometimes you play shows and nobody comes, and it can wear you down, but being in a band with positive and hardworking people and having traveled around and having my faith restored in people and visiting them and seeing the awesome work that they’re doing--that gives me hope.

SILY: What’s the story behind the album art?

SC: It was taken by Maren Celest, who we’ve worked with before. She’s made music videos and shot early photographs of us. We wanted to work with Maren and wanted to come up with a concept. We wanted to work with water and shards--Maren came up with the idea of a bathroom. We wanted to orient the photo in a bathroom some way. We got there, and she has these beautiful old cameras, and she ended up shooting with a 4x5. She took a bunch of photos, and some of them were really cool, and some of the concepts given from us didn’t work out the way we thought. But the shards idea turned out incredibly, and then she took a couple that were more portraits--the press photo we’ve been using with the plant in the background. She had a great way of pulling me and Macie’s eyes in directions. We saw the photo, and it immediately jumped out at us. We wanted the album to embrace a color--blue. That photo turned out to be blue. It looks and feels right for the record.

SILY: Is there a changing approach in how you’re going to play these songs live?

SC: It’s hard to say. They’ve already changed a lot. We definitely dig into them in different parts and have changed different things that were once played by guitar and are now played by our voices. I think all of us are just excited to be playing very high energy these days. We really like rocking out and sweating into our sets. That’s where we’re at right now.

SILY: What else is next for you?

SC: We’re always doing so many things, recording and writing and trying to fly out to our friend’s studio in the desert to work on a project. We’re touring Europe. It’s pretty much nonstop for Macie and I and Matt, too.

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hayleydurkin-blog · 7 years ago

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eloarei · 8 years ago

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Because I can’t seem to get myself to write, and instead am loafing around this blue hell-site, I’m gonna trick myself into writing by doing my notes/layout as a post. As I said before, it’s an Overwatch fic, McHanzo, and a Universe Alteration as opposed to an AU, since the main difference is that McCree is a centaur. Honestly, I’m not even sure if this thing has a real plot, but I’ll try to flesh it out behind the cut.

So far I’ve only written 500 words, but I’m guessing this will amount to, I dunno, roughly 20k? God honestly it could definitely get upwards of 30 or 40k because I can GO ON AND ON sometimes, but let’s hope that’s not the case; the longer the story gets, the more likely it’ll never get done. (Case in point: “Rogue” and “On Track”. Ugh, destroy me.) Anyway, the basic plot is as follows: (though maybe I should warn for, like, slavery and the associated abuse, and racism against mythological creatures) ---Jesse McCree is a centaur, born and raised in the American southwest by a centaur mother, and I can’t decide if his dad is/was a centaur or a human yet. (In my original stories, centaurs can have human fathers, but I realize most people probably don’t follow that kind of logic, and/or think it’s squicky haha) His father doesn’t seem to be in the picture, or simply isn’t important. He lives with his mother, and they love each other, but he has a restless nature and hates their backwater town. He constantly tells her that he’s gonna go strike out on his own. Then one day when he’s fifteen, he’s abducted by slavers. He spends the next month in shipping crates and warehouses with a handful of other centaurs before he eventually ends up in Japan. Centaurs are super uncommon there, so they consider them exotic, which could be a good or a bad thing, depending on how you look at it. He ends up being purchased by the criminal Shimada clan, possibly as potential security. Haven’t decided yet if the Shimadas buy all the centaurs, but they’ve got money, so why not. But of course the main point is that Jesse meets the Shimada heir, fifteen-year-old Hanzo, who’s sort of in-training at dealing with the clan’s crime business. The elders won’t let him do anything too dangerous, of course, but they let him deal with the slaves. Part of the process the slavers go through in dehumanizing their captives is removing their names. They punish the slaves for using their own names with each other, as the slaves are ‘supposed to be’ blank slates for their new owners to name. So when Hanzo begins to deal with Jesse, he never asks his name, and Jesse never gives it, because they both know the rules. Hanzo names him “Iteza” (or “Archer”), the Japanese name of the constellation “Sagittarius”. Jesse says he’s never shot a bow before, and Hanzo begins to train him in archery, during which time they, of course, become friends. Hanzo clearly begins to favor ‘Iteza’; they start to spend a lot of time together outside of clan-sanctioned interactions, and they find themselves in star-crossed puppy love. At one point, Jesse wants to tell Hanzo his real name; he burns to. But Hanzo refuses to hear it. It isn’t that he doesn’t want to know, but that he knows it would be dangerous for both of them. He explains, if ‘Iteza’ were to escape, there is no guarantee that the clan would not wring information from Hanzo, no guarantee that he would not tell them everything he knew. It would be safest if ‘Iteza’ buried his true name from everyone outside. Jesse raises an eyebrow when Hanzo mentions him escaping, like he’d never really even thought about it, and Hanzo brushes it off. Before too long, though, Jesse does escape. Some situation causes his future to look grim; likely, tensions between Shimada and the other criminal clans and/or the law. Before Jesse can be sent off to fight for the clan, Hanzo arranges for his escape. Jesse is conflicted-- but only a little. He leaves without too much prodding. He appreciates Hanzo letting him leave; Hanzo knows it’s for the best and is glad, even though they’re both sure they’ll never see the other again. Back in America, Jesse isn’t sure what to do. It’s been more than a year now that he’s been away. Would it even make sense to go home? Before he can make a decision, he’s attacked and robbed by a gang called Deadlock. He surprises them by kicking quite a few of their asses, so they semi-forcefully recruit him into their gang. It seems like sort of a good idea to him, given that he now has a fair amount of experience dealing with intricate criminal groups, and wasn’t totally set on going home anyway. Furthermore, Deadlock is comprised largely of centaurs, although their leader is human who treats them in a way that sets Jesse a little on edge, as if they were more animals than people. (Jesse tells Deadlock that his name is “Archer”. He’s not ready to tell these people his true name, and although he’s no longer “Iteza”, some small piece of him still wants to hold on to the name.) Deadlock gives him a gun, and teaches him how to shoot. They laugh when he says all he knows how to shoot is a bow, but he’s talented with the new weapon. He makes a place for himself in the gang and stays with them for a few years, until-- When Jesse is nineteen, their gang is busted by the international crimefighting organization Overwatch. He alone is spared, given the chance to join Overwatch or go to jail. (He’s not sure, maybe some of the others were given the chance too, but he’s the only one who is willing to take the opportunities presented to him if it means his survival. It’s something he’s had to learn these past years.) The man who recruits him is Gabriel Reyes, a centaur and one of the commanders of Overwatch. He and Gabe become close, perhaps due to being two of the only centaurs in the team, and both having somewhat rough pasts. Jesse tells Overwatch his real name, but it takes quite a long time before he’s ready to open up about what he’s been through. When he does, Reyes is surprisingly understanding, and promises not to tell others about his history as a slave. More recruits come into the team over the years. One of them is Hanzo Shimada’s brother, Genji, who Jesse was on quite friendly terms with, back in the day. Genji recognizes “Iteza” immediately, and is extremely glad to see him again. However, he looks nothing like how Jesse remembers him. Aside from having been only twelve when they met, and now being fully grown, Genji is also now a cyborg. “What the heck happened, Suzume?” Jesse asks, calling Genji by his childhood nickname, “Sparrow”. “Hanzo happened,” Genji explains. “After you left... he changed. The elders were hard on him when they realized he was to blame for your escape. They became very strict with him. He was never the same after that. He did this to me, at the behest of the family.” Jesse is softly distraught at this turn of events, but he tries not to dwell on it. Genji is at peace with the situation, so Jesse strives to be too. Years pass. Overwatch falls to ruins internally, punctuated at its end by the explosion of the Swiss headquarters. Jesse and the remaining members disband, and Jesse becomes a wanderer, softly haunted by so many pieces of his past and with nowhere to call home anymore. He thinks many times of Hanzo (and of Genji, and of Reyes), but he doesn’t try to return to any of the places he once belonged, perhaps because they were all tainted in their various ways. Eventually, though, the living members of Overwatch are recalled, and Jesse returns immediately. New members begin to come as well; among them, a man he once knew: Hanzo Shimada. Genji was right, he’s different now, and Jesse can see immediately that he’s walking a path similar to one that he has walked, that Hanzo is on a rocky road to recovery. But aside from that, he becomes a different person when he meets Jesse again. He becomes like he was as a child, if only a little. Hanzo has lived in guilt for ten years for what he did to his brother, but learning that not all his decisions were bad, that his choice to help “Iteza” escape was a good one, makes an almost instant difference. Learning Jesse’s real name after all this time and finally getting to interact with him without hiding from his overbearing clan is just as good. Though nothing is easy, has never been easy and may never be easy, the two become close again, and in a way they never could before. THE END sort of. To be honest, I just need to go to bed haha ^^; and I haven’t thought a whole lot more into what might come after this. I want to give it a more definitive ending and plot, but I’m not sure what that will be. Maybe something to do with hunting slavers. Oh, and Reyes showing back up from the dead, of course, because ghastly Thestral-Reyes is a great image. Good lord I stayed up way too late. Well, maybe I can wrangle this into something that makes sense tomorrow. *shrug* If anybody reads this and wants to give me like suggestions or whatever, that’s totally cool. G’night!

#elo talks #elo fics #awfully long layout for a story where it feels like nothing happens

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