#like in this version amends is not just guilt at everything it's also stay repressed + specifically knowledge he Can't like escape himself

[dawnssummers]

this is angel in the reading where angel is Just gay and his pursuit of buffy is about striving for the heterosexual ideal to make up for being gay and also a vampire (rather than just the second bit). and before that a lot of his vampiric behaviour especially pre spike comes from the same place of striving for this approval from a beautiful older woman who might take him as a companion and make things okay + throwing himself into the art of the kill also comes from general resentment at the world. which in this case is specifically tied to being gay. and then it all comes crashing down on him with the soul until he gets taken to buffy. because i really do think angel does vampirism as gay allegory (bisexual version. like buffy as a slayer) and even as liam this is implicit but i generally take this as a layer rather than as like his core/intrinsic character if that makes sense at all. BUT making it core to him and making him specifically gay is also fun <3 i love to just say things