#like i would've enjoyed this level of subtext wholeheartedly if it wasn't for the fact that gaiman IS the gatekeeper here

[marley-manson]

ok i have to rant about good omens, bc the specific subtext we see in crowley/aziraphale is honestly like... the more i think about it, the more i browse the tag, the more i see gaiman’s tweets, the more i’m upset about it

like ok i’m fine with non canon gay ships full of subtext. i’m used to it. when it’s made by straight people who either wouldn’t consider that as a potential interpretation for a second, or who add subtext for the sake of shitty jokes and/or bromance and end up taking things ~too far~ and adding no homos etc then I can ship them and feel spiteful. I can be proud of taking something and recontextualizing it my own way and saying fuck you to the creator(s)

when it’s made by or at least with the involvement of non straight people and stays subtext, then hey, we’re all in the same boat here. it couldn’t be canonized because of studios or publishers or directors or hell even the fear of failure or cancellation or whatever, and that’s cool, I’m still glad I picked up what the actors or director or occasional writer or whatever put down. we’re all doing what we can in a world that’s still very homophobic.

Even if it’s all entirely inadvertant it always felt good to connect with other gay fans who saw the same thing, regardless of creator intent. Finding our own narratives in subtext has been an unfortunate necessity, but it comes with its own thrill, its own sense of enjoyment and fun. It feels good to notice those things, and find other people who notice them.

Like, I would’ve been fine with Hannigram even if it hadn’t been canonized, I was fine with RTD calling the Doctor and the Master soulmates without canonizing anything, like, it is what it is. People underestimate the amount of pressure on creators not to make things full gay. I enjoyed the Sherlock Holmes movies because I know there were external reasons they couldn’t actually be textually gay - I didn’t feel manipulated, I felt like I had been told a genuine gay love story the only way it could’ve been told.

Other shit, the inadvertant or even mean spirited stuff, well, it still feels good to take something not intended for you and make it your own.

Good Omens though, it fits into none of these categories. You know how Good Omens feels to me? Patronizing. Like, when it’s made by a straight dude who has been very vocal about never intending to canonize a romance between them, who did not face homophobic pressure but in fact was the homophobic pressure, who goes so far as to tell people after the fact that they’re not gay, and yet that guy still actively fills the story with gay subtext, plays love songs over their scenes, and retweets people calling it a love story, then like...

:/

I can’t feel good about finding a narrative that speaks to me because it’s not subtle, there’s nothing to find, it’s not put there behind Gaiman’s back, he put it there himself so he could get asspats from the fanbase without leaving his comfort zone. I can’t even ship it spitefully because he wants me to ship it, just as long as he retains plausible deniability for himself and doesn’t have to consider them having sex.

It’s patronizing. It feels like someone throwing a quarter in my tip jar and patting me on the head. Like, it legit makes me feel small lol.

Like fuck I wouldn’t’ve even necessarily minded a subtextual love story if he’d done something else too. He could’ve rewritten Newt as a woman. But man one nb villain and one 2 second shot of a no name dude in bed with a pretty boy and an angel and a demon who get a goddamn love story written for them but don’t even get to hold hands does not a fucking saviour of gay rights make

honestly this is just a result of me browsing through the good omens tag and getting so tired of people not actually knowing what subtext vs text is, all the ‘neil gaiman invented gay rights’ posts, and people leaping to defend his run of the mill basic ‘sure they love each other but they’re not gay’ homophobia we’ve seen from time immemorial. “what more do you want?” a kiss! a shot of them holding hands! verbal confirmation that aziraphale did in fact spend the night at crowley’s even. not leaving everything pointedly ambiguous! an ‘i love you’! fuck even if they held hands while switching their disguises back instead of that awkward no homo handshake clasp. a significant brush of fingers while they’re on the bus or at the ritz even, my fucking standards aren’t high here

but no we get newt and anathema having comedy sex after virtually no interaction because a book told them to and anathema calling him her boyfriend after, we get tracey inviting shadwell to move in with her, and we get a line that could be interpreted as crowley offering to let aziraphale sleep on his couch and aziraphale refusing the offer. romantic music is not text. actors making heart eyes at each other is not text. other ppl thinking they’re gay is not text. ambiguous jokes about discrete gentlemen’s clubs aren’t text. and I don’t even like... I don’t /need/ text. like that aforementioned verbal confirmation that they spent the night in the same apartment wouldn’t be text either. maybe i’d still be disappointed under those circumstances too. but like, at least i wouldn’t be able to feel the pained restraint seeping out of the script lmao.

PS

“Not just A southern pansy Shadwell, THE southern pansy.” You’re gonna keep lines like that (among others) and yet insist that Aziraphale/Crowley is just a possible interpretation? Gonna respond to people asking if they’re gay with “no they’re angels”? Like for fuck’s sake.

I still really enjoyed the show, I still absolutely ship them and I’m still gonna read a bunch of fic and reblog gifs. I still appreciate the actors’ performances and how well they sold it. But like... I hate neil gaiman and i’m tired man.