#like I get it it sounds better but Im not gonna say I'm “retiring from library work” when I quit my college job. it sounds overdramatic.

[nomouthedscream]

PREFACE: I AM A JAIDEN ANIMATIONS FAN, THIS IS NOT MEANT TO BE A HATE POST OR ANYTHING OF THE SORT, ITS JUST MY SUBJECTIVE FEELINGS AND SORT OF MUSINGS

Watched jaidenanimation's new video earlier today, and Im torn. Cause on one hand I feel really happy for her for having made it to 10 years, and I understand the desire to do something else after having done a job for a while, to just relax and be yourself and possibly even rediscover yourself. But also the life she described after youtube is just not a realistic one, even for normal people. Part of the reason the job market is so utterly dogshit is because they work really hard to try and pidgeonhole you into certain positions and actively punish you for going against it. An increasing number of companies are requiring 2-3 years work experience for entry level positions (I wish I was kidding). They don't like it when your most recent job was in a different industry, even if it was for college. And any sort of gap in employment is blamed upon your laziness and lack of work ethic.

And colleges get increasingly pickier about your qualifications and if you should get money the older you are because they want that space youre taking up for some 18 year olds who don't know how to bargain or finacially plan well. My college has a secondary college specifically for "adults" (people over 22). Ive only met about 10 people over 22 in classes, and all of them were seeking masters, doctorates, or work certifications. I have only ever met 2 people over 30 who I took classes with, one seeking a masters while the other was working towards getting a work certification. There are people out there who get bachelors late or second ones after their first set, but they are a rare breed, and often times they either have to have a lot of money on hand or have to be willing to go into debt.

And if you go the self owned buisness route, you have the exact same problem that jaiden complained about with youtube, which is that it never actually leaves your mind, it is always there, a shadow at the edge of your vision.

I just, I dunno, I love Jaiden's content and I'm really happy for her, and I think its kinda sweet she idolizes the simple life. But I also think this video sort of epitomizes the fact that the people who got to make youtube a full time job sort of believe they live in a different world totally separate from ours, and they don't really know what normal is, at least not at the point jaiden's at. It felt like when cottagecore was really popular and people talked about the ideal of "the simple life" or when people were obsessed with van life and a bunch of people then had to come out and say "NO, ITS NOT ALL SUNSHINE AND ROSES". Youtube is a job that changes your lifestyle, but so is... any job. My friend whos gonna start student teaching next semester feels like they can't swear anymore or else theyre gonna slip up. My friend who works as an auctioneer basically has no time for his social life anymore. I constantly have work and college looming in my mind, and I've been repeatedly told to be prepared to dedicate all my time to my work since Im going into a stem field. Its all just sort of a part of growing up and taking on adult life. It's just all work in one form or another. It's incredibly difficult to genuinely retire at a young age now adays so if you want to no longer do a job you're going to have to switch instead. And there is no shame in wanting a job change, but it is always important to recognize what such a change will entail and if you're willing to undergo the hardship you will have to endure to get any sort of reward from it. So... yeah.

Tldr: Jaiden's new 10 year anniversary video reminded me that people really do think the grass is greener on the other side.

[mamaestapa]

First off I looove your writing and look forward to it every week!! Im sure you have tons of blurb requests but could I add a dad joe request where he has teenagers (lived your blurb of that) where they catch their kids like having a party or something?

We Didn't Think You'd Be Back|| Joe Burrow x reader

•pairing: Joe Burrow x reader

•summary: You and Joe come home from your date night to see that your kids threw a party…

•warnings: allusions to sex, dirty talk, language, angry joe and reader, partying, mentions of underage drinking/smoking (there’s none), uhhh i think that’s it? lol

"Mmm," you moaned out as Joe kissed that sweet spot on your neck. The spot that always had you making those beautiful sounds that Joe loved, even twenty years later. You bit your lip as Joe continued to kiss and suck at the skin of your neck and slightly exposed chest. You brought your hands to Joe's upper back, letting your hands trail up to the nape of his neck and letting them rest there. You let out a soft moan at the feeling of Joe's soft lips against your skin, the sound making Joe groan in return. You felt Joe's groan vibrate against your neck, making you shiver involuntarily. Joe pulled his face away from the side of your neck, gazing at you with a lustful look in his blue eyes.

"If you keep that up we're going to have a fifth kid to worry about." He said huskily, making you smile.

"It's a good thing I have an IUD then..." you trailed off, leaning in enough to whisper something in Joe's ear. Something you'd never say out loud to anyone--except Joe. Joe smirked at the words you had uttered in his ear. He reached out and placed a hand on your denim covered thigh, squeezing gently as he spoke.

"I know a place better than the car to do that in..."

"Then show me the way home, Joey." You said is a sultry tone, smirking at your husband as you did so.

With that, Joe put the car in drive and drove the two of you back home, eager to get you inside and up to the bedroom. The two of you went out on a much needed date night. Since Joe's retirement from the NFL, the two of you have been able to spend a lot more time together. Tonight being one of those nights. You left your three children home alone, putting the oldest of the three in charge of the other two. Hazel, your sophomore in college who was home for the summer, wasn't the most responsible of your four children. But you could trust her to watch her younger siblings for a night.

Joe pulled the car into the driveway, his eyebrows furrowing in confusion as he noticed all of the cars parked along the street in front of the house. Joe glanced over at you and you just shrugged.

"Maybe the neighbors are having a party?"

Joe's jaw clenched as he peered out the window, looking at your lit up house--not the neighbors. He shook his head in disappointment as his mouth dropped open in disbelief. He huffed out a sigh as he roughly put the car in park.

"It's not the neighbors that are having a party," he looked over at you, "It's us."

You rolled your eyes and rubbed your hands down your face, letting out a deep sigh. "You've got to be shitting me..." you mumbled angrily under your breath. You and Joe both got out of the car and took a deep breath before you angrily stormed into your home, immediately looking for any of your children.

Digital Animal by Honey Claws was blaring out of the sound system in your living room. A large number of teenagers dancing and grinding to the rave like music. You and Joe just stood in the entry way, jaws dropped in disbelief as you looked at the teenagers in your home.

"Oh I'm gonna kill them." Joe fumed through gritted teeth, while his jaw continued to clench in anger. You shook your head, not even sure what to say you were in so much shock. You and Joe were gone for almost four hours. You thought you could trust your kids to make smart choices while you were gone, but boy were you wrong...

You were about to respond to Joe when one of Jace's friends came up to the two of you, holding an energy drink in his hands. At least there was no alcohol. Then you'd really have a problem.

"Hey Mrs. Burrow," the boy smirked, "How you doin'? I didn't know you'd be home this early."

Joe scoffed in amusement at his sons friend, "Well Max, this is our house." The teen laughed, "Heh, yeah you're right. Anyways, it was good seeing you."

The boy ran off toward Joe's film room, "YO Jace!" he shouted throwing hand up in the air and pointing in your direction, "Your mom is such a MILF, dude!"

Your mouth dropped open in disbelief as you slowly turned to look up at Joe. He was chuckling at the boys words. You gave him a look that said: What are you doing?!

"I mean," Joe smirked, a sly smile on his face, "The kids not wrong..." You shook your head and smacked Joe's chest, making him chuckle. Before kicking all of the partying teenagers out and stopping the party, you and Joe looked around for who started the party: your daughter Hazel. You searched almost every room in the house until you came across something you never wanted to see...

"Oh my god!" Joe exclaimed as he smacked his hands onto his face, quickly covering his eyes. "DAD!" Hazel shrieked, pushing her boyfriend off of her and reaching for her discarded t-shirt, holding it over her body. She stared at you and Joe with a deer in headlights look.

"I can't believe this." you mumbled under your breath. This just kept getting worse. You put your hands up on the top of your head, shaking your head in disbelief as you glanced over at Joe. He still had his hands over his eyes, but you could tell he was fuming.

"What the hell do you think you're doing!?"

Hazel visibly gulped before she spoke, "We didn't think you'd be back until a lot later...so we kind of threw a little party?"

Joe removed his hands from his face, clenching his jaw as he spoke, "Yeah, yeah we can see that." Joe put his hands on his hips as he stared daggers at his daughter.

The two of you chewed out your daughter before searching for your Ivy and Jace, doing the same chewing out to them, too. You couldn't believe they would throw a party at the house while you were gone for four hours. Even though you were both livid with your teenagers, you and Joe were at least thankful there was no smoking or drinking. That would have made things much worse for everyone involved. After having a stern talking to with your kids and sending them to their rooms for the night, you kicked the rest of the partying teenagers out of your house. Once everyone was out of the house, you and Joe plopped down on the couch, letting out heavy sighs once you were sat. So much for your night alone together.

"I'm still in so much shock right now." You said, staring off into the distance. Joe chuckled lightly beside you, "Over what? Our kids throwing a party or our sons best friend calling you a MILF?"

You rolled your eyes, a light laugh escaping your lips as you replied, "Both."

You and Joe both laughed before discussing what to do about the party that was thrown. You were extremely disappointed that the night had to end like this, and not the way you were hoping...

You both have a mess to clean up, and unfortunately, it's not one that you and Joe made.

hi loves!

i got so carried away with this one lol. but this was such a fun request! dad joe with teenagers is so much fun to write bc i just know he’d have the sassiest kids😂

thank you for all of the love and support you’ve shown me on my blurbs tonight. i hope everyone is enjoying them as much as i am!

i may just have to do two dad joe blurb nights—i’ve got a lot of cute requests!🤍

more coming soon…

tags: @erinmartin1987 @klips118 @burrowstyles5 @caroline1019

[spiritblossoming]

daily fun but useless ppau fact #10

aka "EVERY JOKE/EASTER EGG IN ONE DAY YOU'LL WISH YOU HADN'T"

I'm putting it under a read more because it's long af (because... my dumbass.... makes a lot of jokes. if u didn't notice.)

chapter one: wish (soraka r)

“Not a single sign that the Rift’s champions, those gods amongst men, had ever been there at all.”

This was a vague reference to Damwon’s championship skins where they had wanted to appear as gods coming down from the heavens, if I remember correctly.

-

“And Faker would never be enough of a fool to trust someone who once lived in his shadow.”

Faker is (kind of) Zed in this au, so this is secretly a joke. ha ha.

chapter two: you and me (yuumi w) (get it? because meiko's skin is yuumi? i'm not funny ahahahah)

“Hmm,” Jiejie begins, his eyes wandering as he thinks. “I think Meiko would have wished for something to make him an even better support than he already is. Viper probably wished that he’d never miss a shot, and Flandre definitely wished for some magic that’s better than that smoke thing he does. That, or to be able to do this his entire life. Who knows?”

Two out of three isn't bad :)

-

“But Jiejie,” Scout says, intentionally mispronouncing his name. “How can you even be tired?”

I explained this in the end notes already, but Scout pronounces Jiejie’s name like 姐姐, which means older sister. Credit to my friend that only referred to Jiejie as “big sister” all throughout Worlds 2021. Bro is gonna fail Chinese III.

-

“Breathe, Yechan. Breathe.”

I’m pretty sure Scout is the only one to be referred to by his real name by his teammates, if you don’t count the introductions in the first EG fic. Generally, I try to avoid their real names, since it starts to feel a bit awkward once I’m writing about Ryu Minseok and not Keria or something. It’s too personal for me.

(Edit a few days later: I forgot about Miky but c’mon, I was not about to refer to him as “Mikyx” the entire fic)

(Edit a few more days later: Gumayusi got full name’d, shit is going down)

(Edit a few more more days later: everyone getting full name'd now this is not a drill)

-

quick tw for death but when my mom was crying to me about her dad's last wishes i. i kind of. i kind of went "AYO WHAT DID I HAVE MEIKO DO IN ODYWYH TO COMFORT SCOUT I NEED TO KNOW" and just tried to channel whatever he did

im that emotionally constipated kill me

chapter three: end of the line (graves q)

“He plays Teamfight Tactics until he sees stars when he blinks.”

Perhaps in this universe Riot Games is truly a small indie company…

-

“Scout tries to scream, but without the room to expand his chest, all that comes out is the faintest whine.”

This was tested to make sure it was an accurate depiction. I got sleep paralysis once when my sister was audibly on a call in the room over. I tried to scream. Didn’t work. The sound I made was actually very embarrassing. (it is ok to laugh at me for my sleep paralysis experiences. they are funny in hindsight. for more tips on how to handle sleep paralysis just hmu)

-

“We’ll go to Europe, then. I’ve heard there’s a retired Summoner that can suppress someone’s abilities. Maybe he’ll be able to suppress the Rift’s blessing as well.”

Some of you (by which i mean aryasage) caught it already, but this is a reference to Caedrel. In a different version, Scout’s response is, “No, he’ll just cancel it.”

chapter four: moonlight vigil (aphelios r)

“He’s not stupid—he knows what sleep deprivation does to people. (He’s read the Russian sleep experiment creepypasta, after all.)”

Somehow I doubt he would have been able to get his hands on that one, but whatever. Either way it’s kind of terrifying, and if it was true, this fic would go in a very different direction. Would not recommend it if you're scared easily or if you spend too much time thinking about everything that could go wrong.

-

“Telling the whole story to the rest of his team is quite possibly the hardest thing Scout’s ever done, if he ignores the past week or so.”

-

“You look like shit.”

In a different version, Scout absolutely snaps at Jiejie and then proceeds to verbally and emotionally obliterate him. I kind of wish I had been able to keep it in, since I thought it was kind of fun in a “haha angst goes brrr” kind of way, but it didn’t really fit in with the rest of the chapter.

-

“Scout sniffs, gratefully accepting the tissue someone hands him. He’s been going through a lot of those lately, despite it being November.”

Is there even a no-nut November equivalent in China??? Either way I thought I was hilarious in the moment.

-

“Forcibly inducing sleep (aka punching Scout in the head) is out too once Viper mentions brain damage, even if Meiko insists he can fix it.”

They don’t test this theory, but Meiko is 100% confident that his magic can repair brain damage. In the end, they decide it’s not worth finding out.

ppau leak: this comes up later

-

I spent thirty minutes googling how to meditate just to write this chapter. Worth.

-

“Scout tries to respond. His body doesn’t move an inch. Somewhat deliriously, he imagines himself as a meme. Aw, shit. Here we go again.”

-

‘“You need to relax.” Jiejie leans forward, holding two fingers to Scout’s head. “And trust me. Do you trust me?”’

Jiejie quotes Evelynn here for no other reason than He Can.

chapter five: harrowed path (viego e)

“Forgiveness is a bitch, and so am I.”

My English teacher wouldn’t let me use this line in my personal essay, so I put it here instead.

-

“It’s then that Scout realizes they’ve been moved from the couch to someone’s room, where two twin beds have been haphazardly shoved close to each other.”

no homo [lolrpf shippers I'm looking at u.]

[gerogerigaogaigar]

Oasis - (What's The Story) Morning Glory

This is one of the most infuriating albums of all time. It has some of the catchiest and most enjoyable songs of the britpop scene, or it would if the mastering wasn't compressed and brickwalled until the whole album is an unlistenable mess. I'm amazed by how bad Some Might Say sounds, there is this echo effect that is so far in the back of the mix that it sounds like an audio glitch and the song is so fucking loud and every instrument is just flat and indistinguishable. You might as well just listen to static. Where nothing on their debut is catchy enough to be hurt by the production and the heavier style even benefits from it sometimes, this album is only hurt by the garbage mastering to the point where I don't consider this to be a listenable album at all. This is a theoretically great album that is ruined by idiots. Oasis were idiots in the studio and Owen Morris was an idiot at the mixing board.

The Replacements - Let It Be

Despite the cheeky title Let It Be is actually one of the most sincere albums of all time. It captures the feeling of teenage alienation better than any other. The jangly guitars strike a perfect balance between alternative and post punk and the vocals sound like Paul Westerberg is about to burst into tears. Songs like Unsatisfied that could easily be comically maudlin are rendered soul shatteringly sincere. Simple lyrics like "how do you say 'i love you' to an answering machine?" are transformed into complex emotional statements.

Jay-Z - The Black Album

This was Jay-Z's victory lap album. He had announced his intention to retire from music (he obviously didn't do that) so this album coming after the unparalleled masterpiece that is The Blueprint really just come as showing off. He's one of the best rappers ever and he knows it. With a different producer on each track and nonstop self aggrandizing he is indulging in all of a rapper's worst tendencies and pulling it off flawlessly which is almost annoying. And I think that's the point, you are supposed to listen to this album and be kinda mad that he can pull off being so smug with so much style.

Aretha Franklin - Amazing Grace

Listening to gospel is a lot like watching The Exorcist for me. I can appreciate the craft but I cannot feel the emotion it wants me to because being a Christian who believes wholeheartedly in Christ is so fundamental to the work. I do appreciate the energy between Franklin and the audience, her lengthy melismatic interpretations are met with rabid enthusiasm from the crowd who can constantly be heard cheering and shouting along. The energy is infectious even if constantly being told that I have to accept Jesus puts me a little on edge. The first two tracks in particular delight me for how much she sings the old spiritual Mary Don't You Weep with all the flair of a modern soul artists and then turns around and covers Carole King's song You've Got A friend as if it was an old spiritual. She retains a lot of this kind of energy throughout and it's a little infectious even as the album hit the hour and a half mark.

PJ Harvey - Rid Of Me

Rid Of Me sees PJ Harvey at her most extreme. She is intense but also constantly swerving. Time signatures will get weird and then calm back into common time, segments will get chaotic only to then immediately go into a lull. You never really feel secure. The title track is emblematic of that insecurity going back and forth between 'please don't leave me', 'im gonna fuck then kill you', and 'why are you leaving me?' vibes at breakneck pace. Harvey blurs the line between sexual aggression and just aggression really artfully and the production by legendary engineer Steve Albini really makes the wild dynamics changes and rough quality really stand out. Almost certainly PJ Harvey's best album and I don't say that lightly.

[musicallisto]

Hi, congrats on 800 followers! Can I please get a Six of Crows ship? I’m have short brown hair (I dyed red last week) and green eyes. I don't mind if im shipped with a girl or a boy. I like reading (no romantic novels), music and photography. I'm Aquarius. I’m very curious. I'm a little shy and even cold at first. I’m not good with feelings, I mostly keep them to myself if I can, but I care deeply for my loved ones and would do anything to help them, even if I'm not very good at giving advice. ☆

hi! here’s your vanilla milkshake, I hope you like it! I ship you with jesper fahey!

You don’t imagine the extent of my joy to be able to add a gif of an actual real person for Jesper... however shall I survive until Aprid 23rd?

For the longest time, you thought the world started and ended at your corner of Fjerda, in your frozen estate by the True Sea.

You were descented from minor Fjerdan nobility, and your father, jaded by Court Life and its political intrigues - and, unofficially, penniless after giving his all for the sempiternal wars on Ravka -, had decided to leave the capital and retire to his family’s estate by the sea a few years after you were born.

All you had ever known were the large, marbled corridors you’d spend entire afternoons wandering, daydreaming about adventures in the confines of the country - or living the lavish life of a true Fjerdan princess, in an outrageously enormous bed of satin sheets...

The house was spacious and beautiful, with a marvelous view over the sea, gently carrying its boats to and fro before you - and you’d stay there on the balcony in your flowy white dress, admiring the ocean until you couldn’t fight the chills of the night creeping up your spine anymore; but as tranquil and languid as your existence was, it was also terribly lonely.

All you longed for was a sibling, a friend, a partner in crime, someone you could explore the world and go on quests with...

... until a lighting bolt tore the silence, one night.

You couldn’t sleep, so you had gone on a walk by the shore as you often did - your father was never worried about it, since you knew the rocks and their cracks like the back of your hand, and would know the way back home even with your eyes closed.

But you were so absorbed by the distant twinkling of stars that you didn’t notice the shadows creeping up behind you until it was too late.

Screams in a language you can’t understand; an arm around your neck in a chokehold, another slipping under your knees; you thrash around, slice all you can, bite and claw at all you can grasp...

Your abductors know better than to let Fjerdan nobility get away from their grasp. They don’t know exactly who you are - but they’ve guessed from the distinguished aspect of your house that there’s a fine sum to gain from whoever will be willing to pay for you - your father for a ransom, or anyone else, in Kerch, who’ll make good use of your services.

Those brothels in Ketterdam pay good money for young girls, they hear - even more so for a Fjerdan pearl.

When they throw you on an overloaded carriage like a potato sack, you’re still yelling at the top of your lungs, pleading for your father, for one of your maids, for anyone to help you.

But no one hears.

You shed all the tears you have in the first night, tossed around in a dark chariot, off to somewhere unknown. Your father hasn’t prepared you for this - nothing, not even your books nor your fantastical imaginary adventures...

But you don’t intend on being sold off that easily. So you devise a plan to get away.

The first opportunity to break free presents itself when your kidnappers force you to board a ship; but they manage to catch you before you’ve run very far.

But second time’s the charm; with nothing better to do during the voyage than to bide your time and gnaw at your bonds, you’re able to slip from your captor’s watch, and blindly run through the harbor - just to get as far as possible from the stench of this floating carcass.

The first thing that strikes you is the odor. You’ve known the sea forever - it’s clear and bright as ice, and smells of fresh mornings and cold salt; never of this green rot that festers everywhere in these streets... and all those chimneys, all those people, who stare you down as you run down these grimy streets, barefoot in your off-white dress...

You understand that you’re farther from home than you’ve ever been, and it’s not a thrilling adventure, it’s terrifying and overwhelming, and you want nothing more than to burst into tears.

But you don’t, because a pair of strangers flag you down in a language you don’t understand.

A tall and lanky dark-skinned boy, wearing vibrant fabric and a self-assured grin; and possibly the most beautiful girl you’ve ever seen in your life, all bright eyes and genuine frown.

Paralyzed, you open your mouth, once, twice, incapable of making the slightest sound; until the girl notices your visible discomfort, and, eyeing your pale eyes, asks in the slightest of Ravkan accents;

“Are you Fjerdan?”

You nod with all your soul. You’re ready to cling onto them both for dear life.

“What happened to you?”

Your voice fails you - you can’t explain it - you haven’t even comprehended it all. You were curled up in front of the fireplace just the night before...

“Do you have anywhere to go?”

You shake your head with despair, trying to blink back the tears.

“Come with us. We know someone who’ll help you.”

You don’t mull it over very long. Maybe it’s your sheltered uprbinging that has made you naive; maybe it’s the curiously comforting warmth you see in the Ravkan girl’s eyes; but you simply have no better option, and you can’t understand a word of Kerch, or wherever it is that this barbarian folk speak.

Although your two saviors start arguing, probably about whether or not they can reasonably take you in, your tear-stained cheeks and desperate vulnerability are enough to convince them - so you follow them.

Into the lair of the Dregs, of whom you’ve never heard - and of Kaz Brekker, who you know very well.

After all, he’s the infamous gangster who invaded your homeland, broke into the Ice Court, and stole the Shu boy - or so you saw your father read in the papers. To know that you are under the same roof as that lowlife would be enough to give your father a heart attack...

You’re half convinced that he’ll throw you back to the streets, but Nina and, surprisingly, Jesper as well, plead in your favor with a greatly convincing fervor. You learn that it’s probably because Kaz has much greater worries on his mind - the criminal group is planning on retrieving one of their own from the clutches of a treacherous business partner, or so you’ve gathered.

Either way, you’re more than happy that the terrifying and redoubtable Kaz Brekker is leaving you alone, and that you can enjoy Jesper’s company.

You two become unexpectedly good friends overtime. He comes to visit you at the Crow Club, where you’re staying, almost every day. Yet communication is not your strong suit, especially in a language you don’t understand at all, and you don’t fancy yourself a particularly enthralling girl to be around.

Not when one has lived the life of a criminal, a sharpshooter, a wanderer, a playboy... well, all those things that Jesper prises himself on being, and all those words he’s taught you in Kerch.

(That and the curse words, of course, that you’re a bit intimidated to use at first, until they slip out of your mouth one evening when you drop your plate at dinner with the Dregs, and the entire canteen falls dead silent.)

“Did she just say ‘fuck’?”

“I think she just said fuck.”

“See, Matthias, she wasn’t immediately struck by lighting by Djel’s hand. You won’t die if you say it.”

Speaking of Matthias, he’s also a good friend of yours - it’s comforting and refreshing to have a familiar face around, one of Fjerdan roots and mores.

Although the rest of the group says you’re not that Fjerdan.

“You’re one of the feisty ones, at least.”

“I’m not ‘feisty’. Shut up, Jesper.”

“Ah, I see you’ve been working on the vocabulary I taught you!”

Matthias and you both have a lot of soul-searching and unlearning to do about the outside world - you were raised in particularly bigoted environments, you somewhat less than him. The hatred for the Grisha he’s been taught by the Drüskelle is fear in your case; you’ve been brought up on bedtime stories of bloodthirsty Grisha who devour unruly kids, and war and devastation caused by their unstability and blasphemous magic.

It’s even more of a shock to you when you learn Jesper is a Grisha.

Unbeknownst to you, you’ve started to fall a little for him - how could you not? He’s funny, charming, sarcastic and witty; always has the best stories to tell, and despite it all, sincerely cares for you amidst the chaos of their heist and revenge plans.

But to learn he was the kind of monster - no, the kind of creature - no, the kind of person, you force yourself to correct mentally - that you had been taught to fear for your entire life...

“I’m so sorry. You should never have been there.”

He’s pacing back and forth in your room after a shootout has gone awry and you were caught in the crossifre; it’s the first time he’s ever had to use his Durast powers to get you of the mess - and normally he wouldn’t have, because it’s a secret he wishes he could carry to the grave, but the fear of losing you was too strong...

“Thank god that I was there, though. What would you do without me?”

He’s fidgety and restless, nervously playing with his pistols, and his nervous laugh is all but genuine; and you’re huddled up on your bed, staring him down with wide eyes.

“Jesper, you...”

“Yeah, maybe not the best moment.”

“Jesper...”

“It’s like they have a knack for knowing exactly where we’re gonna be and when...”

“Jesper!”

He abruptly turns to look at you, and his eyes widen. He’s starting to understand, almost, but refuses to believe it. Your voice is a murmur, and you can hardly hold his gaze.

“Jesper, are you... going to hurt me?”

His words die in his throat. He remembers where you’re from... the garbage that they must have filled your ears and head with from the day you were born... how feverish Matthias was with Nina... he looks at his hands, and his Materialki magic rumbles like a dark curse.

“Y/N, you’re scared of me?”

The sheer hurt in his voice breaks your heart. Even though you’re trembling, you let him step closer to you, slowly. It’s Jesper in front of you, not some ungodly monster from legends... Jesper, your Jesper...

“I’m... I’m sorry...”

He cups your face in his hands, warm and just a bit moist, and stares into your eyes with a vulnerability you have never seen in him.

“I’d never do anything to hurt you, Y/N, I swear on my life. All I want is you to be safe...”

Safe from me, if that’s what you wish, he thinks for a split second, but you don’t give him time to doubt; you’ve captured his lips in a frenzied kiss, and hold on for dear life onto his lean shoulders.

Fjerda and its blind hatred is very far from you, now. You're locked in Jesper's embrace, and you won't have to hear their lies anymore.

You know you have nothing to fear from him; not now, and not ever.

800 follower sleepover CLOSED!

[cattles-bians]

exes au part 11

post directory

obsetress: i'm about to fully fall asleep but i have been thinking about exes au danvi and like the isabel of it all and dani dating a single mom and how just like

obsetress: vi is so protective of isabel and as much as she loves dani like

obsetress: she took SO LONG before introducing her and then like

obsetress: when they broke up dani left and dani wasnt in isabels life anymore and dani was so good for isabel and viola just feels so fuckin shitty and blames herself and

obsetress: but i'm also thinkin bout soft fluffy stuff too like how much dani loves isabel and how much vi loves watching isabel w dani and

em: hey hannah what the fuck

obsetress: isabel has a nightmare one night and goes to her mom's room and dani's there too and she just curls up between them

em: do you think when they finally reconnected dani was like hey um. does isabel remember me. would it be weird if

obsetress: FUCK

obsetress: this absolutely happens

em: viola is VERY apprehensive at first

obsetress: god yeah esp after getting so hurt by it but

obsetress: viola sure cannot say no to dani!

em: i love some dani with kids tho

em: maybe too soft but do u think for at least a couple years dani would like. send isabel a bday card

em: like dead air otherwise

em: hmm idk i am chewing that one over more

obsetress: god it's hard i think dani wants to but she doesn't

obsetress: i could see dani writing them and holding onto them

em: oh that’s even worse

obsetress: even tho she really doesnt think she'll ever talk to vi again

em: what a soft and depressing thought. thank u. i resent u.

obsetress: yeah it hurts!

obsetress: but then she does! and she gives them all to isabel when she's older maybe

em: hold on i’m gonna bawl

em: sometimes my parents will be like um. do u remember this person and i’m like uh i don’t remember people i worked w two years ago let alone

em: but i think isabel does

em: i will be thinking about this all afternoon bestie have a wonderful slumber

[em note: em yells in hannahs DMs while she's asleep dot png]

em: no um. mate im still furious about the isabel of it all wtf

em: thinking about um. like ok i dont wanna use isabel as a prop but this is certainly one of those times where

em: violas been hurt before and viola's hurt other people before because she's deeply troubled and i feel like that would be one of the first times she sorta. sure she licks her wounds and feels miserable for herself but its also like uh

em: really sobering to realise This Hurts Isabel Too

em: because yknow violas very gatekeep gaslight girlboss i think shes got a strong enough sense of self that nothing really shakes that. maybe even to a deluded degree. i dont think she goes to therapy because shes like wow im fucked up i gotta get help, she's more like

em: shes really driven by her love for isabel!! gestures WILDLY

em: realised this is an au where parents get therapy and dont pass their traumas onto their kids and i want OFF this WILD RIDE im so tired of discovering things about myself through the realm of fiction

obsetress: yeah same i kept thinking about it too alfkadlsfkjdasf

obsetress: i want to reply to every single line of the isabel thing but i'm not gonna do that so let me just say: YEAH

obsetress: like isabel is her cornerstone full stop everything comes down to isabel

em: dani's probably so nervous reconnecting w isabel again. absolutely spinning her lil wheels

em: they set up a lil date and time and dani's doing her gay nervous babble abt if isabel even remembers her or god forbid resents her n jamies like...

em: im pursing my lips as i draw a line on the whiteboard between jamie's whole childhood and isabels and shaking my head Goddamn It

em: jamie lets dani babble it out n pauses and reflects on what she's saying n then jamie's like. the fact ur nervous means u care. n kids are v good at picking up when ppl care. you'll be alright.

obsetress: god yeah this bit i can just. hear it

obsetress: it's so visceral

---

em: viola

obsetress: god my favorite taurus hedonist

[em note: hannah yells in em's DMs while em is asleep dot png]

obsetress: god fuck what was i thinking about isabel this morning like

obsetress: that's what i get for daydreamin between snoozes and not writing it down alas

obsetress: but just like how excited isabel is to see dani again when she does and also like, isabel and rebecca

obsetress: then i started thinking about

obsetress: rebecca and vi getting married and vi's always like i'm not gonna get married again it's bullshit and rebecca's like it's not for me but then they just

obsetress: like they live together and they share everything and rebecca looks out for isabel just as much and they get to a point and it's like

obsetress: oh. oh

obsetress: like they're both like it's the logical thing to do. it's logical and it's safe and we should have this extra layer of protection but also it's like

obsetress: they find themselves more and more excited a lil you know? and just thinking about how isabel's there and how excited isabel is and

obsetress: but god yeah what i was thinking about this morning like. one day vi has to tell isabel dani's not gonna be coming around anymore and like

obsetress: isabel doesn't really understand and she's so sad and then vi feels even shittier

obsetress: and she's like "we'll be okay. it's you and me, remember? moving mountains"

obsetress: "you me us, right?"

obsetress: the first time rebecca meets her she brings her a book as a gift and is like "this was one of my favorites" and

obsetress: OH I REMEMBERED

obsetress: so like when dani sees isabel again finally (and yknow as nervous as dani was vi was even more on edge because it's so inconsistent and is she gonna understand yknow? and the two of them just spiral––which is also another thing about the two of them in a relationship! i think they push each other down spirals)

obsetress: jamie's there too and dani's like "this is... this is, uh, jamie" and it's like you said jamie isabel parallels and so jamie's like a lil tender

obsetress: spoiler: isabel and jamie end up bonding the most

obsetress: jamie's like running around with isabel on her shoulders and then showing her all these plants and taking her to gardens and

obsetress: another tentative jamie vi alliance

em: isabel mikey hangout When

obsetress: isabel mikey hangout!

obsetress: they're hanging with isabel and she and jamie have a very spirited discussion where isabel's like "i wanna be a princess" and dani's like "why not a knight?" and jamie's like "why not opt out of the feudalistic hierarchy entirely and ditch the kingdom for the high seas?" and convinces isabel to go full pirate

obsetress: and then isabel kinda passes out with her head in jamie's lap and jamie's just kinda idly playing with her hair (vi is already like "am i... attracted to jamie in this moment?")

obsetress: and jamie's like "y'know, i should bring mikey round next time isabel's here" and viola's like "......who?" and jamie's like "my little brother? mikey?" and viola's like "right.... right"

obsetress: cut to later, when dani and jamie have retired to vi and becca's guest room: "since when does jamie have a little brother?" "she always has, babe"

em: kinda obsessed w like. violas love for isabel means her wires get crossed when the surly gardener is Good With Kids

obsetress: yeah

obsetress: mikey and isabel immediately hit it off i think

obsetress: a bit of an odd couple because i think isabel is definitely, like, her mother's daughter and mikey is............. mikey

obsetress: but i think they meet in the middle and help each other grow and play pirates together

em: viola is like. of course mikey and isabel will get along. isabel is wonderful. but jamie is quietly Sweating about the whole thing

em: so damvibecca are having their afternoon tea and their little cakes and jamie is Quietly sweating and she’s like ‘quiet is good, right? like they’re not tryna k-‘ and then there’s the sound of two 8 year olds (idk how old they are tbh) YELLING as they chase each other down the hall w wrapping paper tubes

obsetress: nervous babbling dani x quietly sweating jamie, an otp

em: isabel has gotten into the make up n given them both black eyes n scars and moustaches n everyone’s like oh no how’s viola gonna feel about this but viola is DELIGHTED

obsetress: dani's like "chill you all she's gonna––" and then viola is getting up and asking them to do her face too

em: made a parrot outta a sock and newspaper

obsetress: viola playing pirates w isabel and mikey

em: kids w their endless creativity n absolute disregard for personal property is truly a thing of dreams

obsetress: mikey gives her a paper tube and she disarms isabel, takes hers, and offers it very seriously to jamie

em: cuteeee

obsetress: rebecca's giving dani a look and dani is completely unfazed and reaching for another tea cake

em: absolutely unflappable dani clayton

em: dani and rebecca sharing a Look like hey have you ever seen her this gleeful

obsetress: there is something very tasty about jamie taylor having a direct hand in making viola so gleeful

em: takes a village!

obsetress: when viola's two big loves are sitting five feet away from them both

em: everyone changes everyone for the better

em: fucken soft ass chat over here

obsetress: everyone changes everyone for the better

obsetress: soft as hell

em: thesis statement everyone likes each other so much (jamie pretends she doesn’t)

obsetress: (jamie pretends she doesn't) (jamie might like everyone the most)

obsetress: viola registers mikey for isabel's school n pays full tuition

em: oh my god

obsetress: jamie is horrified and refuses to accept it and viola waves a hand and is like "too late, deposit's non-refundable"

em: (they carpool)

obsetress: PLEASE

obsetress: oh god and like

obsetress: flora and miles go there too

obsetress: full circle complete

em: broke: highschool au woke: guardians of primary schoolers au

obsetress: dani jamie in bed jamie's like "you don't...... think it's weird?" "hmm?" "mikey going to.... school with our boss' kids?" "why would that be weird" "i dunno" "he also goes to school with my ex's kid" "he's best friends with your ex's kid" "and that's not weird, is it?" (grumbles) "not anymore" "so why would this be?"

em: jamie’s ribbing mikey for his silly tie and straw hat but she teaches him how to tie a tie and also she keeps crying for some reason???

obsetress: oh fuck

em: mikey: can’t i just get a fake tie >:/

jamie: no because when u have a real tie you can leave it untied a little as an act of rebellion

obsetress: god it's jamie crying for me

em: i love that big baby

obsetress: so much!

em: jamies like idk what’s gotten into me i never cry n danis like. raises one eye brow and mentally checks off all the times jamie has absolutely bawled watching a movie

em: not even a sad movie

em: dani plays along

em: maybe ur getting soft in ur old age jamie

obsetress: jamie i cry three four times a day five if i'm being honest taylor

em: thinking about their weekly weekend lunch w damvibecca and hannah and owen and miles and flora and

obsetress: dfjsldkfjslfslfj

obsetress: god big found family

obsetress: you know viola doesn't like

obsetress: dani and jamie respectfully toe around whatever the fuck owen and hannah have going on but viola just does not suffer it. she's so blunt to them

em: big viola grin and all ‘owen, hannah, i assume you will be each other’s dates?’ (owen chokes on his tiny egg sandwich)

em: hannah grose is serene and unreadable as she dabs a bit off yolk off owens moustache

em: maybe even a bit pleased

obsetress: everyone is always so tense when viola and hannah get together because neither of them take shit yknow

obsetress: and everyone's like "which way is this gonna go"

em: god. peak snarky broads

obsetress: but usually they end up good. two apex predators where one is a lil vicious but the other is so confident in its status that it just chills

em: they have the Best gossip

obsetress: would love to sit in and listen as they drink tea and gossip tbh

em: viola presses owen on hannah and he goes red and viola presses hannah on owen and she does a little wouldnt-you-like-to-know into her tea

em: viola nee willoughby and hannah grose friendship is. truly something i never knew i needed until now

em: they’re both just that lil bit older than the rest of the gang too

obsetress: an important coalition

obsetress: hannah grose! hannah looking out for rebecca and that's the couple times she gets a lil testy w vi

obsetress: mikey and isabel besties but flora and mikey get along really well and isabel and miles do too i think

em: the sheer chaos of a taylor-lloyd-windgrave story time

obsetress: LDKFjKLSDJF HELP

obsetress: taylor lloyd wingrave story time

obsetress: jamie suddenly very invested in story time

obsetress: dani's like "i know this is the first time you've actually cared about story time, babe, so let me give you some pointers"

em: i was just in my head thinking fondly about like. jamie is a drop out and plays a lil dumb sometimes for fun but also prolly reads a lot especially to mikey and now i’m like. wait i’m talking to Ms Floras Two Moms herself

em: idk if i had that headcanon before i read she taught me a lesson alright but yknow what! doesn’t matter it’s a beautiful one

obsetress: thank youuuu i love it a lot

obsetress: jamie big reader is generally one of my fave headcanons tbh i'm glad it seems to be widely accepted. can't even explain why it's just nice

em: sometimes i will talk 2 ppl about my passionate drop out jamie taylor belief n then they’re like but she’s smart (it’s only happened a couple times hahsj) and i’m like these aren’t mutually exclusive!! this is my very biased experience but my friends who do manual labor for a living seem to read so much more than my friends who don’t

em: your brain wants to chew over things while the hands are workin i reckon

obsetress: yes yes yes yes yes

obsetress: i think that's also like (sighs heavily)

obsetress: symptomatic of hegemonic perceptions of the working class

em: i love when u sigh heavily it’s always a fun take

obsetress: i think jamie is v clever and reflective and like if there's one thing i've learned getting older it's

obsetress: smart doesn't matter i think the most insightful most thoughtful people are the most reflective ones

obsetress: like none of it fuckin matters just be a nice person

[stimmypaw]

Stimmypaw reads Darkest Night! The fourth text post!

Back with these uh live reading comments! Remember those? yeah! I'm on the fourth book of Warrior Cats: A Vision of Shadows :D I read The Apprentice's Quest and Thunder and Shadow and Shattered Sky and now!! I'm here :D and boy did I have a time. Click read more to see it!

NEEDLETAIL?????????

Needletail???????????

What?????

OH???????

Wh THIS GUY IS TALKIN 2 DEAD PEOPLE????

HOW WHO IS THAT

OH MY GOD

These guys are weak and dumb skyclan is epic and sharing the territory with them is good, but of course sparkpelt isn't dealing well with change wink wink nudge wink nudge nudge huh???? (this is a nod to how I project into her and say shes autistic)

I am getting anxious for tinycloud SERIOUSLY how much longer until those kits??? Everyday you show up and its WOW my tummy ssure is HUGE AND BULGING I just Wonder Oh When They'll Be Born, probably pretty soon!!! :) and then they arent!!!! Birth dammit!!!

Cherryfall cut the sick and hurt cats some slack jeez youre Fine, youre not feeding half the forest and you have THREE medicine cats ready to help you if youre not feeling well

Bastard Cherryfall I hate you /lh

Dovewing and Tigerheart have relationship drama again. What is UP with those two I simply do not understand them

Watching Bramblestar trying to control this bizarre situation is actually funny he is so close to screaming "PLEASE dont be mad :c"

SOON WHEN???? JUST KIT THOSE KITTENS DAMMIT

Get her, Alderheart

They LITERALLY said something about sharing the territory, they were like "Stars have five points baby and we need those 5 clans togetherrrr" what else do these cats want??? I know its a big change but its necessary

Wait everyone shut up that cat is named Podlight this is so important to me

Dang these cats are really still struggling :c I wish they didnt blame each other

Harestar is so cool

What the FUCK mistystar????

God what a disaster of a gathering Starclan is gonna be so pissed everyone is doing the opposite of what they should

I was holding my breath oof

I hope thunderclan gives some territory too thats too small a space for Skyclan

Oh boy oh boy oh boy i am Anxious for these Kitties

Violetpaw is me having nightmares every night

Macgyver is a heavily gringue name and I have No Clue how to say it how the hell do you say it

Update its either Mick Guyver or Mac Guyver apparently

Its fun to see how different the sisters are from one another, I love them both

I also love their mom with the name identical to puddleshine wish I got to meet her

IM CRYING BRO........M...MDB.....NFBANN.....VIOLETPAW BELONGS MY DARLING MY DAUGHTER

Sadly Twigpaw is for gender binarism 😔 /j

Twigpaw is often in her thoughts and doesn't pay attention to anything around her and I love her for that

Bad news Finpaw is gonna lose his tail, good news I can draw his tail fin-shaped

Puddleshine surgeon moment!!!

I love Graystripe and Millie

And I love that being flirty is a part of Sparkpelt's personality, I don't know what Alderheart is talking about she's always been dandelion-headed

Ok this is epic, I’m glad we’re breaking gender roles in Warrior Cats my heart dropped when the books called Briarlight cr*ppled, that’s the thing they promised not to do anymore recently right? I’m not sure but, I could use some uh less ableism on my Warrior Cats, the series is old but the newer books should be better, so yeah, good modernize these cats babyyy

OH COOL Skyclan journey!!! Fun I hope they find someone :] also fuck Molewhisker and Cherryfall bastards.

Jayfeather is gonna miss Alderheart too much for him to leave hehehe

ALL of Starclan showed up just to call out Riverclan pahahah

oooo is shadowclan haunted?????

FINALLY TINYCLOUD IS KITTING YES GOD YES GO QUEEN GOOOO!!!!

I wonder why Twigpaw wants to stay behind, there has to be more than just the camp stuff

"I wish I were more positive like Twigpaw, but at least I'm just as scarred by the death of my loved ones as my dad :] I like being like him"

Violetpaw witnesses a car crash 😔 that was a bit messy what happened to those cars also why the hell was one of them smaller was it a bike??? Or ???? Idk what's up with it!!!

Needletail just happens to have slow-down turned on for her on the discord chat so she can only say like a few words each hour :/ why the hell is she here tho Violetpaw needs to get OVER your death!!!!

This short exchange has made me love Dewpaw

Also, I love Twigpaw, I still wonder why she stayed behind tho

Ahh, is it cus she feels too estranged from her family :c ? I wish her mom was around maybe that would help

Jee Twigpaw be a tad more empathic, I can see Twigpaw struggles with that sometimes

You can't cheer him up right now he's grieving, just find him on common ground, talk to him, don't try to make him happy just try to keep him company

Oh wow finpaw that's a dangerous thing to say I hope Twigpaw doesn't crumble under the pressure to never be sad because people like her because she's happy and her being sad would be bad

ALSO I JUST REMMEMBRERD UH TWIGPAW MENTIONED BRIARLIGHT BUT BERRYNOSE IS RIGHT THERE???? HE IS RIGHT HE DIDNT DIE OFF SCREEN IM SURE OF IT WAIY

BERRYNOSS IS RIGHT THERE I CHDCKED!!!! HE LOST HIS TAIL TOO AND HES A GREAT WARRIOR, TWIGPAW!!!! YOU SHOULD HAVE MENTIONED IT ITS MORE RELATABLE

Okay I'm glad they're getting along this is nice

Oh look twigpaw you Are like your father :] this is cute

Skyclan begins to fish competitively I'm glad

I like it when medicine cats bicker about their leader's behaviors ehheheh, Jayfeather talking about how weak Shadowclan is, Alderheart being annoyed at his father for wanting to stay silent, the others worried about the tensions this is all cheff the kisser

Jayfeather spitting the truths about how Starclan doesn't know shit, and he is very much one to speak

Puddleshine: Rowanstar stepped up the patrols :c

Leadstar: He has warriors enough for that?? Damn good for him

Dang poor Skyclan I hope they manage stuff better soon

Oooo the girls are fighting!!!

Alderheart starclan anxiety time dang

Sheep :]

Needletail :[

I'm sad Ravenpaw isn't here, this is a lovely reunion scene but knowing Barley will be alone when they all leave breaks my heart

Oh, maybe not, but if they stay I'll be sad also cus Skyclan needs its warriors

Aw man, Twigpaw is struggling :c

OUCH

I WANT SKYCLAN 2 SWIM THO......

Omg crimes

That sounds kinda possessive twigpaw!

DOVEWING?????

T

WhHAHAGAHAHA WHERE DID THAT COME FROM

omg tigerstar 2 real

Whats he gonna do to rowanstar???

ALRIGHT THATA OVER THEN PAHAHA

Aw, I'm glad they're having fun tho, and that twigpaw sees herself as skyclan

Alderheart, as he meets someone for the first time in a while: ARE YOU OKAY???

Blackstar protagonist moment

The medicine cats: our gods are toying with us again and destiny is uncertain

Leaders: I cannot DO this right now PLEASE leave and let me care for The Real Issues

Alderheart: YOU WILL hang out at my house Willowshine this isn't up for debate

Riverclan suffered enough and it's their turn to throw a tantrum about it, honestly good for them hsghahah

Alderheart asks his father to go on a quest to check people's feet

WHAT THR HELL IS A CANTANKEROUS

Alderheart and Willowpelt sitting there watching Shadowclan fight

This is really funny

HEWWO????

Puddleshine, in his eyes: help help

I love Skyclan

Ok this sounds like it's gonna be very very fun

Mission impossible: Escape From São Paulo

Oh, is Fallowfern deaf? That's so poggers omg I wanna see more of her

Edit: fallowfern is an elder that lost her hearing with age and retired after that happened :/ boring

I love leafstar so much

Juniperclaw: aren't you gonna punish her????

Leafstar: why

Juniperclaw: when I tell rowanstar he's gonna be pissed

Leafstar: don't tell him

Juniperclaw: the fuck is wrong with you and your clan??? Where is everyone???????

Leafstar: busy

Icon

I don't trust abled people specially able-bodied people telling disabled people they just have to train harder and feeling sorry for yourself won't help.

But this is the closest to a positive message to disabled people we have ever had in warriors so I guess I'll take it but I want better

IVYPOOL!!!💖💖💖💖💕

Dang ivypool what a way to show someone you miss them hahaha

Twigpaw: uhhhh how's dovewing?

Ivypool: what do you mean did she do something illegal I'm sure she did

Ivypool is a seriously funny character WHY are you yelling at the young adult about your sisters illegal activities she doesn't know anything about it!!!!

Alderheart goes on an adventure

Feet inspector on the road!!!!

Jasper is so funny I love him

Omg what's he got against clan cats??? What's his sad backstory????

YEESSSS SPARKPELT MY LOVE 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💕💕💕💕💕💕💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💕💕💕

Sparkpelt your opinion sucks but I love you

I'm really really glad they had this moment this is really sweet, they hadn't talked for a while but this is genuine like, we hadn't had this sort of relationship in so long in the books with just, dialogue yknow??? THEYRE TALKING ABOUT THINGS

And the pause Sparkpelt takes between her speaking to fix what she's saying "I'm sorry for saving you :c no wait uhh not exactly but like" this is so good so natural so fun I love you sparkpelt

I get why she has a diferent opinion on Skyclan it's good for someone close to Alderheart to have a different mindset from him and for him to have someone like uh be opposites from him a lil yknow contrats his characteristics makes both siblings fun round and full of kitty do you get what I'm saying???

I love this

I love Sparkpelt, love her lil anxious moments, love her, love that she just wants to fool around with toms and enjoys Larksong but doesn't want to get serious you go girl

They wanted to write smart-ass they wanted to write smart-ass so bad

They're doing this in the rain?????

I'm quite certain Violetpaw is a young adult by this point its valid for her to go

Wh why did you let your cat out in the rain dude!!! When it comes back it's gonna dirty up the whole place it's wet out there!!!! And the cold is gonna get in the house!!!!!!!

I WAS HOLDING MY BREATH OH LORD

That was SO INTENSE AND SO FUNNY AND SO MUCH, IM SO GLAD SHE MADE IT I GOT SCARED

Oh this is so epic

That moment when your cat nearly dies and then it runs off and you go after it and then a bunch of other cats show up and start running with it

I hope Twigpaw can see the others soon

Glad to see her keeping her medicine cat knowledge ehehehe

???????

Sandynose I hate you you are so abled

Sandynose: I don't want my son to feel distanced from his peers so I'm distancing him from his peers

DOVEWING???

SANDYNOSE SHUT UP IM GOING TO KILL YOU ANS MURDER YOU

I'm so upset with Sandynose WHY isn't leafstar seeing this WHY DOESNG ANYONE SEE THIS SOMSONE PLEASE CONFORT AND LOVE MY CHILD TWIGPAW DOESNT DESERVE THIS

Angry sad upset why

Piscina

Thanks graystripe

Ok who's dying this time

Ok no one just a background cat got hurt he will survive otherwise it would be relevant

This was intense though what will happen now???

YES FINALLY

Oh this is lovely so good they're here!!! The rest of skyclan has arrived and we are all happy together

That dream felt good

NEEDLETAIL??? AGAIN

Where were you at!!!!

What!!!

Check this man's feet how many toes are there this could be good

What

Hegshahwha what the fuck is up with this guy

Okay I like him

Ohhh THATS tree

Change your name if you don't like it you sound trans already

Yeah nothing makes one smarter like dying

This is very fun I'm excited for more of whatever happening

Twigpaw :c

HIS SNIFFLES

Oh no

Hhhhnn I want Twigpaw to be happy so bad, I hate seeing her struggles

Sandynose you are so evil and very detested by me

You can and you SHOULD feel angry at Sandynose he SUCKS and he is being needlessly mean at you!!!!! There are much better ways to bring up the possibility that maybe you'd be happier with thunderclan!!! Fuck off Sandynose

Oh so Snowbush hasn't improved, maybe he will die?

Poor Alderheart

Oh fuck there he goes

Yeah

Aw man, rip to the background cat

That was a heavy death too

Aw, I was hoping the rest of Skyclan would show up before the gathering, maybe just after it???

I wonder what's going on in Shadowclan

TIGERHEARTS MISSING HUH???

The couple was kidnapped

HUH????

Oh my lord oh fuck

Can't anyone step up to lead why do they depend on Tigerheart so much???

Jesus christ

Alderheart kills his gods

This is so chaotic and funny I'm worried as hell for shadowclan but excited a lot is happening

HI TREE AGSGAHAH

Tawnypelt >:(

Puddleshine: WAIT DONT KICK HIM OUT, CHECK OUT HIS FREAKY FEET INSTEAD

Oh dear

Twigpaw :c

TWIGPAW :CCCC Man rememebr when I said I hope Twigpaw doesn't crumble under the pressure of being happy for others? yeah

GET OUT SANDYNOSE I DONT CARE YOURE BEING REASOMABLE FOR ONCE YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN LATER

:C

I'm so heartbroken for them

Uh pdhsgahab okay then

Bye finpaw

Wow that was easy for him

This is fun

I'm still sad as hell

Okay there's a lot going on right now wow

The owl scene was funny as hell to picture, this dramatic prophetic moment and the cats just "uuggh is that a prophecy??? Nooo"

Okay so

There's some shadowclan cats missing, considering the many sleekwhisker maps I'm sure she's up to no good but I have no clue what happened to the others and I hope they're okay

Wow! That was really something

Fantastic ending to a very good book its, definitely a different energy from the third but I'm really enjoying this I'm still excited as hell!!! I got worried things would get kinda bad from here but nope!!!! Very fun stuff for now this is very very good and I am enjoying it

This is definitely one of the most fun arcs I've read so far!!! The drama the stakes the little moments everything is tying together really well into a very fun story I'm enjoying a lot!

I worry for Twigpaw and hope for her happiness, and Violetshine too, hope her and Hawkwing deal well with missing her. Tree is being interesting. Alderheart wasn't much of a focus here but always fun to see him trying to solve the damn prophecy no leaders seem to care about. Mousewhisker was okay??? Lots of very fantastic turns for all events and uh let's see where this all goes next!!!

[punkscowardschampions]

Ali & Carly

Ali: [Weds night before her bday] Ali: woman you home Carly: not mine y? Ali: because ITS YOUR BIRTHDAY Ali: and I need to come bearing gifts Carly: now? k then Carly: ill get there before u Ali: you @ one of the lads then? Ali: no rush 'cept I do wanna be the first so like b4 midnight cinders 🎃👠 Carly: i werent born @ 12 tho & u kno that from doing my chart 🔮🌟 Carly: but ur so cute Ali: tru but Ali: i'm excited Ali: can't start the party without guest of honour 7 Carly: aw Carly: i wont take these 15 💊s yet 👼 Carly: we can party together Ali: 🎁? Carly: idk can u call it a 🎁 if u have to give back Ali: Boo 👎 Carly: not what he said when we were done Ali: 🙄 still Ali: not very festive of him Carly: idc its been fun Carly: coulda stayed in w ma & da but its not a retirement party in the works like Ali: for now Ali: but I got better plans than either Carly: yea? Ali: 'course Ali: who am I Ali: who are we Carly: 🐅💙🐇 Carly: i barely knew u on my last bday 😢💔 Ali: it's insane Ali: you're so important and integral to me how did we not get together before then Ali: I'm not the only one with plans tho 🌌💕 Carly: too many lads to swap first ha Carly: i kno my ma has been planning all wk but idk cuz shes learned to be subtle somehow Carly: must b her new man teaching her things Ali: Eskimo sisters for life, baby 😂 Ali: 👀 come thru shaz Ali: sounds promising Carly: 🤞🌌🔮 Ali: not her new man, obvs Carly: hes no cavante tho still only a few yrs older Ali: if I beat you I'll hit her up for the scoop Carly: 🍀 Ali: 😬 Ali: I guess we've got her answer for the age old experience vs stamina Carly: could b where i left her wine drunk in the hot tub still Carly: falls asleep there more than the marital bed Carly: mermaid energy ha Ali: not wine drunk Ali: worse energy than coke rage, I swear Ali: watch out cat lady, protect your children Carly: aw ill look after them Ali: 👼 Ali: I'll take any bday bumps for you 💪 Carly: never liked coke or wine soz ma if thats my 🎁 Carly: still my hero 💙 Ali: those people are the worst Ali: lemme buy something for me and give it to you Ali: no sharon THAT IS NOT 👏 IN 👏 THE 👏 SPIRIT 👏 OKAY 👏 Carly: my gma does that every yr! xmas too Carly: so boring unwrapping that bible each time Carly: good rolling paper tho Ali: 😂 Ali: the lord is in you, it's what she wanted Ali: just in your lungs but you know Carly: ha Carly: what r u bringing me boo? Ali: don't you want the surprise babe Carly: idk last time u really surprised me it was w a divorce so u could get ur man Ali: 😥 Carly: 😂 jk u kno i love surprises Ali: just devastated you're calling me predictable for the last, how many months Ali: cut me deep, birthday girl Carly: i dont surprise easy Carly: y the lads like me Carly: dont b sad baby Ali: never Ali: not when there's partying to be done Carly: yay Ali: and a 👸 to celebrate Carly: ur sweet 🍬🍭 Carly: i dont look like a princess rn Carly: no running away Ali: you always do Ali: even when you running from ogres Carly: ur gonna make me look worse when im crying too Ali: meant to save them for the party Ali: but I'll never tell Carly: ha its been a few yrs since a bday tantrum Carly: really had to wait for that bike tho Ali: and #werk baby Ali: you were as adorable then, how your parents didn't spoil you is a mystery to me Carly: ask them if u do get here before me Carly: but before i was medicated i wasnt as 👼 could b the answer Ali: lecture 'em on how wrong they were, more like Carly: ur a bias little 🐱💙 Carly: & u didnt kno me then even if u do remember i grew into my 👂s Ali: 😂 Ali: well I never grew into my 👁s and my 'tudes no better either and you still love me so Ali: deal with it, Walsh 😜 Carly: aw u were the cutest 👶 Carly: & u get cuter every yr Ali: hey, don't spoil my heartfelt message in your card! Ali: 😏 Carly: im sorry Carly: ill have 1 for the road & forget Ali: I think one of the boys just catcalled me without offering to give me a ride in their white van/carriage Ali: see me struggling here lads, is that part of the appeal? probs Carly: which y? ill threaten to uninvite him from the party Carly: 1* Ali: not the kinda bitch to resort to racism 'cos I'm mildly upset or angered but they really be looking the same behind the wheel of a transit, like Ali: think it was one of Ronan's brothers? Ali: and in fairness, never slept with you so whaddya owe me, kind sir Carly: ha Carly: if he could see & be seen @ the wheel then i reckon i kno Carly: & i have slept w him so he will b 💔😢 if he cant celebrate w me Ali: my hero 💚 Carly: 💙 Carly: been thru every1 old enough in that fam now ha Carly: gonna have to move like Ali: I wish I could tell you the surprise was a hot new fam Ali: alas Ali: wouldn't fit them on my back, like Carly: 😢💔 Ali: I've let you down Ali: how could I Ali: gonna eat my feelings 🎂 Carly: 🍯🐝 no Carly: never Ali: what's the dresscode for this shindig then Carly: idk not allowed to go w bday suits Carly: my da overruled me Ali: gotta whittle down my knock you dead options Ali: even with those stifling guidelines, tah Mr Walsh, I should manage it Carly: i believe in u baby Ali: 👼👼👼 Carly: im back btw Carly: used my wings mayb Ali: damn Ali: was really hopinh for some 1x1 with your ma Carly: she will scoot over in bed for u Carly: not just me who misses u Ali: awh Ali: can we convince her to give you your present early or nah Ali: I say yeah Carly: me too so 2 votes Carly: my da will b asleep too deep to cast his even if she says no weve outnumbered her Ali: 💪 Ali: I'll put the phone down and run Ali: gimme 5 Carly: k Carly: be careful tho Carly: some of the 💡 r out Ali: 👌 Ali: my middle name Carly: fun is ur middle name Carly: how many do u have? Ali: as many as you want Ali: 😉 Ali: but just the one, actually Carly: hot Carly: u can have 1 of mine then wed both have 2 each Ali: are you actually 👑 Carly: my ma wishes Carly: queen of the site tho Carly: ha Ali: I've not bought her a crown Ali: not soz Carly: its k shes got her prom tiara somewhere Ali: memories 🎶 Carly: am i gonna peak before 18 too? Ali: never Ali: only way is 📈 baby Carly: u make me feel really happy u kno Ali: ☀🌻🍓🍯🐝🐰 Ali: it's mutual boo Carly: im crying Carly: & smiling Carly: its the 💊s ma Ali: it's the 💘 Ali: she gets it Carly: aw Carly: yea shes really 💘 w the lad from the chemist Carly: knocking our 💙 off the top Ali: can't be having that Ali: got all weekend to prove we're 🥇 Carly: til ur bf shows up Ali: nuuh Ali: it's all about you Carly: ur so nice to me Ali: you'll see feel and believe it ✨ Carly: 🔮🌌 Carly: r u gonna stay? Ali: can I? Carly: yea Ali: then yeah Carly: aw ur my 🎁 Ali: I haven't copped out that hard, don't worry Ali: come help me Ali: not very gentlemanly of me but I wanna be with you before we've gotta hear about the prom queen's glory days Carly: k Carly: 💪💙

[whimsically-ominously-auspice]

I'm so happy to hear the kids abducted to Hong Kong got to hear and see and talk to their hero that saved them today through Zoom in Brian's phone!!!

It was so lucky and such perfect timing that he called me today while the military crews were still resting in China and Wendy was able to pinpoint their locations directly!!

He truly is their Hero and we are so lucky!

I have dreamed about him for years and for years have been waking up from nightmares telling Brian McGruff is a bad dog... But always the dream would be gone when i woke up or it was before it started happening and no one knew

I even had a feeling when I ordered the kits... So I'm not sure how these kids feel through the cracks because they were on my soul to save.

I also didn't know know about human trafficking like I do now, so I think the whole "Sabrina you just have a bad feeling because it reminds you what could happen..." Is how

A few other companies, too... I had a whole list. So Thorn is gonna check that out.

It just takes one person to prove a mood. I had a list of 17 companies that day then 26 more over the next week that I had this nag on while I was "picking on" Crime the McGruff Dog

Since I kept saying it that way in 2016 and I never ever messed up his name before they took down a list of companies associated with him according to my feelings and it was an unusual list.

So this man has likely saved nearly 30 times as many children as he could have hoped.

We will soon find out. In return he's to receive a mansion an economically stable brand new automobile. Fully paid.

Because I've dreamed of him, his voice and everything. He truly is an Earth Angel.

For nearly half a decade he's been the solution to my night terrors. I know why ask those children cried. I want to cry, too, And my tears are warm.

The children were mutated and mutilated. Arms cut off and sewn onto their foreheads and given all sorts of horrible viruses and drugs.

Tree just gave them their own fresh bodies. Replicas. Some back to the age/look they were kidnapped at, some slightly grown, according to the agreement between child and parent whichever they liked the sound of best, the child's preference being the ultimate decision maker. Their DNA4U will state and show they are replicated due to the reasons of faster healing and less overall damage that would cause future problems plus they got upgrades like bullet proofing, extra speed, strength increases, stuff like that. And extra extra heavy COVID19 instead of 3 feet you'll get it at 10 feet bad enough to kill you nearly instantly.

But they were horribly mistreated, starving, mental and physical torture, so much.

So I know to talk to the one rare person in the World that could save them and did was certainly very good heart and soul medicine.

So I'm glad he called me again and I didn't answer and Brian called back from the plane.

Yes of course. He flew to Enid then China then Hong Kong... You can make a man retire but you can't ever make a man quit. And I'm glad. Just so those kids could talk to their hero.

So lucky. Of all the hundreds of people working there he's been there only 6 months. And he took that initiative to just check...

Today living kids was 443.

Dead was 198,675 which tree ghosted back to life. (Gave new bodies)

Nearly a quarter of a million children.

Times 3 is 600k then add a zero. Looking at maybe 6 million kids and young adults...

Tree estimates 400M

So a huge round of applause and a right tight hug.

And he deserves amazing amounts of pats on the back because that list would just sat around keeping dusty.

This is that old fashioned detective work like sitting at a gas meter while some one is down trying to find out how to save people (aliens included) from dying in a gas chamber and they're up there making sure that gas isn't turned on to kill the girl doing all the work -- he couldn't hear people downstairs through the street and i could get the truth out easier and faster before they even knew and I was always happy to get the news while he was just mad and angry. So i was the better to go. Cause everyone was always happy to see me. Cause I was always super nice and all interested in what they were doing.

Now unfortunately not so much.

But Charles was starting to get nightmares after my list and had came up with 14 more companies from coming from the same way i had came up with my list... So he talked to some the other people that felt creeped out about the assignment I insisted on doing and they also all added each two and then some kept a private list... Which they slowly added after verifying the company was then clean.. It started in 2013 these bad dreams.

So every time it happened or they started their nightmares they added to the list.

Overall 642 companies we dreamed of or felt or somehow had a psychic connection to. I dreamed of kids and old people and women. Some people only dreamed about men. Some just kids.

The companies we have left is 642 to check out as they hadn't had yet done any bad and no dreams or any thing has came up since...

Which isn't happy, we now know, but good news is whatever bad has happened we can fix is super special and magical ways.

So we have Thorn, CIA, Military, some FBI and some others to check what's been going on and see.

So that's about 8 Trillion that have been affected. But at least 6 Trillion have already been retrieved.

So this one single person has done the miraculous. The biggest miracle we have been waiting for on a personal level. For me its been 7 years but 6 since 9 other people started having their dreams affected and the lists began.

So 10 of us with nightmares. Night terrors. Waking up screaming or shaking or scared. And not knowing why but having a name, a company label. Sometimes or often a place on a map... As close to the actual GPS coordinates of longitude and latitude. Wake up listing numbers for no reason. Numbers that make no sense N 316941027865389421. Over and over.

Brian would look at me "what the fuck are you trying to do Morse code?"

"I'm trying to sleep thank you very much. Alan and Naomi. 38652361 I think you just messed me up"

One person. One person can make a difference. That's all it takes. One person.

One person to make sense of all these nightmares.

We don't need to be saved from them... They didn't bother so much... We could wake up. Be safe in our beds. Joke it out.

But there's people. Innocent children. Innocent adults that wake up into real living nightmares every single day.

And one person today made the phone call to make thst difference to about 200,000 kids and over 400,000 parents. And siblings and grandparents. Friends.

Just today he changed the world for at least a million whom now have a missing child come home.

Made one million hearts smile and backs release tension and sorrow.

And now we're looking at 2 trillion lost people. Who have kids. Who have parents. Grandparents. Friends.

Were gonna have at least 6 trillion hearts heal then there's soulmates so that's gonna be 12 trillion

Due to one phone call. That was all I needed.

I had heard him say he couldn't find his soulmate... And he didn't go trying to save her or find her today

He knew it was just kids.

But he knew it was missing kids because the people getting ID kits were told not to call the police only call the dog. He could see clearly kids were being abducted and they had a rating system on "easy to kidnap to hard" and the easy were always reported within weeks.

He knew it was his civil duty to call and report it somehow... But he didn't know to who or how.. Who would take it seriously.

This crazy lady might...

Im very sensitive to red flags. He didn't even have to explain. I was already on it in less than 2 minutes.

So the world is so lucky to have him and the kids today so lucky to be in Hong Kong when we just busted 600k China's citizens home.

I mean you can't get more miraculous than that!!

You would think...

But leave it to the true McGruff the Crime Dog to make sure it did.

Because it did.

Tree will update us later how extremely far this miracle went

From one person hoping and praying and taking that leap of faith.... After 10 following their true instincts and intuition.

Intuition is so important you guys. If you hadn't understood why i hope now you finally get it.

Last night I trusted mine and we pulled 13 million from slavery. That's 26 million directly affected with soulmate syndrome. Then parents that makes it times two. So 52 million then grandparents and kids...

Then one person trusted his. And kaboom an estimated 12 Trillion frowns are gonna turn upside down.

Then we are getting these bad guys off the streets, out of their homes, immediately. Hopefully they're checked thoroughly and then killed. I'm done with this baby sitting shit. Back to good ole South Texas and manual strangulation in vans after being kidnapped...but now technology has made it so much different. Much simpler to catch someone in the act. And fuck this court system, it's WWIII. Its military. We will find them guilty without a reasonable doubt and simply kill them.

There is no fucking reason over 18 million people were kidnapped in late 2019 (after October) or in any fucking time in 2020.

What is the point of a trial? Those people whom went to jail in 1990 for 20 years for kidnapping are doing it again. I sent 700 to jail. 36 are actively kidnapping. 642 are financially benefiting. The remaining are probably dead. 12 people.

Tree says i make him laugh. They are dead.

So out of 700 they're dead or kidnapping or in the human trafficking market.

So, there is No change and no Rehabilitation. There is PROOF.

So human trafficking ass holes y'all can thank those 688. Because now you're all just gonna fucking die.

What are you gonna do to me? Not a dam thing. That's what. So think about bull shit. Cry about your stupid life. I don't care.

But I'm taking all your money to pay the victims and im killing you, human traffickers.

And you ain't doing shit about it.

And those about to be trying to hurt someone to retaliate. I already put alerts on you.

So when you're pushed out a plane in the middle of no where so wild animals can eat you... Well don't complain to me. Animals need to eat, too

And surviving good humans. Don't worry... When the bodies hit the ground. They pretty much explode so they're just ground meat basically and bones crush and they wre just big piles of food. They don't look human

So some bear isnt going to come out the mountains and be all "man I just ate something that looked like you and was mighty tastey!" The bodies are unrecognizable.

If you're curious... Idk if you still can.. We used to can look up bodies that had been tossed or jumped out of Windows. Back in 2000 I found a website and I would go through and examine them and see which were pushed and which had jumped

I could tell the difference. Anyway if they're in Google you'll see they don't look human. They're pretty gross -- some do -- so ew be careful but from the plane height trust me they do not.

And its very careful with software to show no damage to trees or animals will occur.. And the software is very intelligent and cautious and only certain types of people can access it. Like a kidnapper can't turn on the computer and see where and how. But a Clark Kent or Louis Lane or someone can. But if an evil Donald Trump sits down next to, the software will shut down. Immediately. And lock out any user until hes removed.

I'm not fucking dumb. Sometimes I just don't know what to do and Need an Earth Angel to make one phone call

Or a guilty person to confess. Or a clue. A bad dream. A nightmare in my sleep. Or being in the right place at the right time. Like when the kidnappers gas up at night at the gas station.

Otherwise I'm fucking brilliant. Overprotective and caring.

So any one tries to dump innocent people out of planes, the door simply will not open. Magic it is called. Its already happened. And it will not happen again.

Anyway for all the 007 Peirces that can stab so hard it hurts and heals at the same time.

This one is for you.

Thank you!

Lets really bust a move on that intuition. Its a life saver.

Man we are so so so so so so lucky today!!!

I couldn't be more thank ful!!

All of our military and cops that are ready and qualified and remember how to rescue from bunkers.

We need y'all. Don't forget to stay safe and well.

And our essientals and just our stay homers.

And beach goers.