#like I don't even have the energy to really feel the righteous anger mega bitch rage anymore I'm just tired
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I think, and this is gonna sound crazy but stay with me, that life should just get a little bit easier and softer and kinder
#every day this month has felt like some kind of mental health saw trap and I'm just really tired#like I don't even have the energy to really feel the righteous anger mega bitch rage anymore I'm just tired#my brain and body are like cat turds microwaved in a hot pocket crisper#I'd give anything to go back to last summer's secret family elopement drama that at the time I thought was hellish#at least that was funny and not happening like in my own house I could turn off the chatter#now though. every time I turn around there is some problem with the house. it has not stopped for the entire month of july.#it's literally just been problem after problem after problem and it's not like. interpersonal issues where we could all sit down and talk#it's like appliances dying. pest problems. money problems cause all the other endless problems#they changed shit at my job and have made it 700× more difficult and stressful#and I have to really actually legitimately find a second job now too cause of all the financials#like. all I've ever wanted was just a very simple life. ppl make fun of me cause I don't do much I don't have big aspirations#but my life was not spectacular growing up. all I ever wanted was simple peace and some cats. nothing flashy.#and like even that's an impossible ask it seems. every day there's a new fuckin problem but there isn't a bag of money to go with it#I'm just so tired. I'm just tired down to the marrow#erin explains it all
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