#light wins any nerd fight in there cause he's basically fucking their mom

[cocopaine]

imagine you start dating your fated intellcutal rival and he reveals you now have to prove yourself to 24 genius orphans as like their step father lmao can you imagine

[gordvendomewhore]

BULLY OC MEME [CHRIS KATO]

hey!! so i meant to post this uh. MONTHS ago, but...later is better than never LMAOO

if you’ve been following me for awhile, you might’ve heard me mention chris and hollis before!! they are my ocs, and they’re actually from an original story of mine lmao they weren’t made for bully.

this is chris’s template!! hollis’s will be posted right after this!!

also fair warning im not,,, japanese so her japanese dialogue might not be 100% accurate and maybe even cringey but im basing all my info on google translate (ew i know), japanese websites, my friend who speaks the language, and my own experiences with mixing foreign languages into english lmao.

anyway, have fun reading this if you do!! and feel free to ask any questions you might have about chris uwu (photos of her are at the end!!)

[INFO]

Name: Christine Konami Kato (加藤 琥波 Kato Konami)

Gender: Female

Pronouns: She/Her

Sexuality: Lesbian

Clique: Non-cliques, but on good terms with the greasers

Personality: Blunt, indifferent, critical, philosophical.

Weapon/fighting style of choice:

- Chris can hold herself in a physical fight, but not well enough to actually win without any major injury (unless it’s against the Nerds, Bullies, or Non-Cliques).

- However, she is incredibly fast and has insanely accurate aim, which fuels her preference for projectile weapons.

- In fights, Chris will run away from her opponent and turn back to throw whatever weapon she has at them; It gives her the advantage of distance.

- Chris doesn’t really care about beating someone else up to the point of them passing out, she just wants to cause chaos and escape without a busted lip.

- While she’ll use any projectile weapon, Chris prefers firecrackers. She’ll also occasionally use marbles.

[DIALOGUE]

Greetings:

- Hey, Hopkins.

- What’s up?

- Nice seeing you around, Jimmy.

Saying Goodbye:

- I gotta go. My girl’s waiting for me.

- Hate to cut the conversation short, but there’s better things I have to do.

- Someone’s calling my name. See you later.

Chasing:

- Idiot, you really think you can outrun me?

- My parents had to run all the way to Japan to escape me, Hopkins!

- Can’t you run any faster? You’re making this too easy, Hopkins!

Out of Breath:

- God...maybe...I should cut back on the cigarettes...

- ちくしょう。。。(Damn it...)

- ...Whatever. There’s better things to do.

Walking around talking to themselves:

- I miss Japan.

- Can’t wait to see this place go down in flames. Metaphorically and literally.

- 彼女はとても可愛い。。。(She’s so cute...)

- Gotta check up on Hollis later.

- I miss おばあちゃん。(I miss grandma.)

- Don’t the jocks have better things to do than hunt me down?

- Do I have my lighter?

- Everyone in this 不浄な地 thinks they’re so great. (Everyone in this shithole thinks they’re so great.) (Note: the direct translation of 不浄な地 is “unclean land.”)

Conversing:

- You hear about Gary’s new pet? Now he has another weasel to go along with that runt, Kowalski.

- I hear Johnny Vincent’s having trouble keeping his relationship together. And his mental stability, but everyone already knows that.

- Ever light a car on fire?

- You hear about Gary’s big, bad plan?

- I’m not an arsonist! It’s not like I burnt down my entire middle school!

- Word on the street says Peanut has it real bad for the boss. Seems like every second in command does.

Conversation Response:

- I hope not.

- You did what?

- Yeah, no.

- Sure.

- Karma’s coming your way.

- Sure, doesn’t sound too bad.

- Mhm, yeah.

Complaining:

- I wish that Northwick kid would stop bothering me.

- Johnny’s just pissed because my girl actually wants me.

- I love Hollis, but I cannot stand another four hours of posing for one of her paintings.

- They couldn’t just take me back with them. They just had to send me to this hellhole.

- God, I need another cigarette.

- The greasers are so clingy.

Unknown/Cut Dialogue:

- Yeah, yeah, my girlfriend will pay you.

- くたばれ！(Fuck off!)

- ...Naked twister?

- Maybe the tooth fairy will give you a few dollars for the teeth I knock out.

- Who knew I’d be coming to you for help, huh?

- Don’t...drink hand soap? I feel like I shouldn’t have to tell you this.

Starting fight with Cliques:

[Bullies]

- Don’t make this any harder for yourself.

- Let’s make this quick, yeah?

- Your mom hit me harder in bed last night!

- Don’t you think you’d look so much cooler in a neck brace?

- ああ, 黙れ. (Oh, just shut up.)

[Preps]

- Pretend I’m daddy’s black card and run faster!

- Let’s see if your blood’s actually blue.

- Inbred freak!

- Boxing rules don’t apply when you can’t even touch me! [Laughs]

- 青鬼! (Blue demon!)

[Greasers]

- Come on, we smoke together, I’m basically one of you!

- I hope your hair products aren’t flammable.

- Is this because I don’t slick my hair back?

- Is this because I don’t wear a leather jacket?

- くたばれ! (Drop dead!)

[Nerds]

- I’ll let you take your glasses off before I break your face.

- You don’t want a repeat of Alexandria, do you?

- Roll that D20; It’ll decide how many of your bones I’m gonna break.

- 弱虫! (Wimp!)

- Maybe you should start taking that saying, “Hit the books,” more literally.

[Jocks]

- You can’t break my spine if you can’t catch me!

- ‘Roid rage alert!

- Work on your cardio, 下衆野郎! (Asshole!)

- You’re supposed to avoid the firecracker, not catch it with your face.

- とんちき！(Meathead!)

[Townies]

- Save your bitching for someone who cares.

- We’re both poor! Shouldn’t there be some form of solidarity?

- ばかげた! (Flunky!)

- Hit me if you can!

- Chase after the preps instead! They can get you free healthcare if you beat it out of them!

Requesting an errand:

- Hey, Jimmy, got a second to spare?

- You owe me, Hopkins. You know that saying, an eye for an eye.

- I have a favor to cash in. Uh-uh-uh, don’t try backing out of this.

Friendly Comments:

- Woah, you look half-decent for once, Hopkins.

- Maybe you can finally get a girlfriend now.

- New wardrobe, huh? Doesn’t look too bad.

- You finally fixed your looks! Now you just gotta fix your personality.

Unfriendly Comments:

- You make me want to light myself on fire.

- It’s cute seeing you follow in your mom’s footsteps, やりまん. (Slut.)

- Don’t even try making eye contact with me.

- [Loud Snickering] Oh, sorry, I wasn’t laughing at you! [Sarcasm]

[EXTRA]

Demanding flowers:

- Come on, you gotta prove you’re worth my time.

- You got something special for me, don’t you, Hopkins?

- Don’t you think it’s time you pay me back for my kindness?

- A little something would be nice...

After receiving flowers:

- Thanks, my girlfriend loves flowers.

- Such a gentleman, James. Too bad I’ve never had a thing for men.

- ...Are these from the Girl’s Dorm?

- It’ll be fun to burn these, thank you.

Before kissing:

(No matter what, Jimmy can’t actually kiss Chris)

- [Bad Japanese Accent] Uh, sorry, no English.

- I’d like to avoid getting cooties if possible, thanks.

- I got a girlfriend, Hopkins.

- Sorry, I’m allergic to boys.

@video-space this is 4 you....

[mentalcurls]

3.  Una festa in cui nessuno ti vuole

Here we go, my thoughts on episode 3 of season 1! Finally the whole girl squad is together and out there having fun. The topics I’ve managed to ramble about about this time are double standards, fandom, Mom friend™ Giovanni Garau and the mysterious Francesca Mirabella, as well as the results of the Bechdel test for this episode  ✌🏻

“Eva, mi guardi?” was the precursor to “Martino, guardami Martino!”

Gio really doesn’t get it. He keeps saying he’s doing things for Eva, when actually he does them to appease her so she won’t bust his balls, so he’s doing them for himself

Cerami and Bea sound exactly like all couples of middle schoolers I knew when I was in middle school myself. The shoes thing especially. It’s hilarious.

I understand Gio’s frustration with Eva, I do, cause it’s hard being the only point of reference for a person when you have a much more diverse social life. I’ve been on both sides of their situations actually. When Gio says “Couldn’t you try to make some friends?” I know his intentions are good, he’s coming from a place of wanting happiness for this girl he’s in love with, despite being frustrated with her just then; but I also understand Eva a lot, the feeling of isolation, of not knowing what to do or who to turn to because everyone just seems too distant or too busy with their lives (and of course there’s some condescension there too, cause she’s a teenager, she’s got standards, especially since she was popular before fighting with Laura), and the frustration she must feel, because it’s not just Laura ostracizing her, she made scorched earth around Eva for several degrees of acquaintances; and I’m 100% sure that deep, deep down Eva is a bit angry that she had to bear most of the brunt while Gio came out of the situation unscathed

Eva’s disdain for her classmates who like manga and k-pop wounds me deep into my fangirl heart, not because I’m specifically a fan of those things myself, but because she’s using those example to say they’re loser nerds because they have that strong passion for those things, the same passion I am, as a matter of fact, pouring over Skam Italia and Eva’s own story right now. Plus she’s basically shitting on fandoms included among those mostly made up of teen girls and LGBTQ+ people, so there’s that. Are you a fangirl of anything, Eva? Do you know what it means to fell such a pull towards something, a book, a movie, a song? Have you ever felt it? Do you know how nice, how rewarding being a part of fandom is? How fun? My wish for Eva at the end of the season, for when she decides to focus more on herself, on understanding who she is, is actually to get in one of those fandoms she seems to dislike, cause it’s a wild ride, yes, but it’s also an opportunity to learn so much about other people, places, worlds, and ultimately about yourself.

“Eva, it’s nice to be around you. Maybe you forgot, but when someone is around you, it feels nice. Trust me.” And this I think is the first real taste of that Mom friend™ Gio we’ve come to know and love in season 2, that protective, supportive, loyal person who gives good advice and just knows how to lift your spirits. This could have 100% been a conversation he had with Marti in S2, if Marti had been feeling insecure after he pushed everyone away. More importantly, this could 100% be something Gio tells Nico at any point ever in which he’s feeling low. Can you imagine that? Oh my God. Especially with the joke about smelling afterwards. (Aaand I made it about S2 rather than about Eva. Ops.)

poor Eva, she tries so hard. Too hard, in fact. If instead of that whole three-messages-and-a-sticker explanation she’d just gone “*Hey” it would have made her cringe less at herself and it would probably have prompted more of a response from Ele. I understand the panic though.

those theatre kids look just like the twins from “The Shining”! The girls is even wearing light blue like them! And they walk in sync and call Eva’s name repeatedly and ask her to come act in a play with them! OMG, LudoBesse’s mind, honestly.

Ele is so bad at fake crying, really. And the fact that theatre guy, a person who’s supposed to know something about acting/pretending, falls for it kills me.

Evanora for the win, honestly, look how cute they are together. I mean, Ele definitely looks pretty smitten here, immediately noticing Eva from afar, making her smile and reassuring her in a roundabout way about her fumble on Facebook a few days before

poor Gio, the Anglo-Spanish War is kind of a bitch, though to be fair the only things about it history professors usually care about are who was ruling those countries and the Invincible Armada; the Thirty Years’ War is much more interesting (defenestration of Prague, anyone?)

how cute is Silvia??? BRB going to throw myself into a volcano

Gio and Marti doing the parent thing over Eva like Gio and Elia will do in S2 over Marti himself

then Martino catches Federica’s eye and we have the infamous spoon scene; Fede sort-of-pretends-to-fellate the spoon and Marti looks away, embarrassed and uneasy. I love how Skam (both the og and Italia) have taken the trope of the guy ogling the girl from afar (or not so afar) and her feeling uncomfortable under the attention, and have reversed the gender of who’s looking and who’s looked at.

What I don’t like is how it’s framed, in the shots and in the discussion between the characters, like it’s creepier than most of the stuff boys do to girls during the series (I’m thinking especially of guys at parties in general and of the Villa boys). The vehemence Martino uses to express his discomfort over Federica sexualizing him and making her interest evident is basically the same with which the girls react to finding the tally on the wall behind the boys’ bathrooms. This would kind of be fine, despite the fact that the two things are imo on different levels of disgusting, if it was discussed somehow that boys doing disturbing stuff are considered normal, just hormonal teensagers, but when girls do a fraction of the same thing they’re demonized, considered really weird and too horny. There’s no discussion of the double standard and that’s what bothers me.

Something else that would have been interesting to explore, maybe not with Marti, but later with possibly Chicco Rodi, since we see Fede talk to him at a party and even kiss him (if I remember correctly) is the follow-up from that trope: the guy usually goes up to the girl and makes a comment and she turns him away, but oftentimes after he insists a while she concedes and she ends up dancing/going out/going home with him. Which is a shitty thing that happens in a lot of media. It’s actually kind of what happens with Edoardo and Eleonora later. And it would have been super interesting to see Fede doing the ogling thing (which would have never been as rude, graphic and uncomfortable as guys can get, anyways), being turned down, then actually getting her way, and what kind of reactions she’d have from the guy and from the girl squad.

Martino is such an asshole! Silvia obviously extends her invitation to him and Gio out of politeness because they’re friends with the girl who helped her in a bad situation, she doesn’t know them and she was not obligated to invite them along. And while Gio manages to keep an appearance of politeness, Martino straight up mocks Silvia who’s been nothing but nice and enthusiastic towards Eva. That, in my book, is even worse than the two boys being their unsupportive selves yet again and telling Eva to get new friends, then not helping her make some. And that’s such a boys thing, honestly, to spot a problem and tell others to solve it but not help along!

and Silvia is so nice, she’s so good at driving the conversation along, keeping track of the social cues: she feels Eva doesn’t agree with the guys, so she extends her invitation again, then elbows Fede for some support, but she just makes things awkward so Silvia has to smooth things out, then she invites Eva again and is finally able to make plans, but she still has to diffuse the situation when she sees the boys are uncomfortable with Fede’s suggestive actions. So much emotional labour for just one conversation. Thankfully Eva helps her along a bit, cause no-one else does.

by the way, I totally understand and share Federica’s kind of humor and I love her

Marti’s face at Fede’s joke about psychotropic drugs though. Completely blank, just for a second.

I think it’s telling, though, that Federica is one with the weird actions and the weird humor nobody gets, because she’s the fat girl, so she gets pigeonholed as the comic-relief character: she does whatever comes to her mind, she doesn’t seem to pick up on social cues and she’s there mostly to make the other characters laugh or to make them look more refined, more clever or to say how cool they are; sure, she’s a good friend who stands up for Sana and Eva when it’s called for but her character could be way rounder

oh, guys. Marti and Gio’s reaction as soon as Silvia and Fede are out of earshot, it makes my heart bleed. The mocking, the casual fat shaming, the way Martino looks absolutely disgusted about that girl showing an interest in him

Ele acting aloof and dismissive of Silvia is not my favorite thing, I mean, I get not liking a person from the get go, but for God’s sake, come up with an excuse or something, there’s no need to be so blunt when she’s just inviting you to a party

you can actually subtly see Ele kind of relax when Fede arrives, she’s obviously much more her speed

and of course we have Sana, scathing Sana, picking up on Silvia’s racism straight away and calling her the fuck out but diffusing the situation with humor anyways

Silvia is looking for cool girls to make her own group since she’s been more or less kicked out of Laura’s; Silvia probably used to be the popular girls in her class, but Laura has taken that role from her, first integrating with Sara in Silvia’s friend group, then “overthrowing” her, despite only being in her class a few months, given that the transfer from Succursale, when Laura, Eva and Gio’s class was separated into groups that were merged with pre-existing classes, happened the previous September

(btw, Eva, Gio, Marti and Elia are in 4B, Ele in in 4A, so Silvia, Fede, Laura and Sara are in another class; Sana is probably in yet another class; and Luca could be either in the same class as Ele, as Silvia and Fede, as Sana or in another completely different class)

Eva hasn’t picked up on Silvia’s desperate desire to be one of the cool people yet, and Eleonora hasn’t explained it to her either? Pffft

OMG Silvia has an older sister???? I completely missed that the first time around! Hi Francesca Mirabella! You seem to be older and popular since you get into Villa guys’ parties, so you explain so much about Silvia

Ele has been at Kennedy high only for a month, so she might not know yet who the most popular people are yet, I can get behind that; but Eva? After 7 months? Not having the perception of the internal hierarchy of her school? Girl, please.

Eleonora dubs Edoardo “faccia da cazzo” and “capelli di merda” right away 👏👏👏

on the other hand, Sana seems to know the social hierarchy of both the school and her year very well, probably because she absolutely needs to in order to avoid at least some of the discrimination

Sana clearly has plenty of ideas about how to be popular, but she’s much better at preaching than at doing; Silvia wants to be liked by everyone, probably because of some complex she has about being in her sister’s shadow, but her solution is to be at the same time judgemental and a pushover; Sana’s brutal honesty and “advice” is meant more to hurt than to help Silvia become a better, more genuinely likable person; Sana’s probably lashing out because she was hurt by Silvia’s behaviour towards her

Federica is so clearly the comic relief in this scene, not one of her lines pushes the conversation along plus she acts like she’s completely oblivious to the tension between Silvia and Sana

yas for Eleonora who has the common sense to actually look for an alternative solution since they’re obviously not going to Martucci’s party, I like a practical girl

even at the club, Sana shows diffidence until the girls (probably Ele with some help from Fede) pull her in, drag her away from the bar so she can take selfies and dance with them; is she uncomfortable? Is she just trying to act cool? Is it a defense mechanism? Is she trying to keep away so people won’t look weirdly at the girls because they associate with the “terrorist”, is she afraid someone will say or do something?

seeing the girls dancing and having fun like gives me such a nostalgic feeling for those few (because I’m a really self-conscious motherfucker) parties in high school in which I was really able to have fun with my friends

Bechdel test: the episodes passes the test, with flying colors I might add, since there’s the conversation between Eva and Eleonora in the corridor after the theatre guys leave; Silvia thanking Eva and inviting her to the party; the whole scene with the girl squad in the courtyard, both when it’s just Ele and Eva, when Silvia arrives, when all five girls are present and when Sana leaves; finally, the first part of the conversation at the Baretto, when they’re talking about the party, then Edoardo is mentioned and it stops passing the test.

This post is part of my complete series of meta about Skam Italia season 1.  If you’d like to read more of my thoughts about the other episodes, you can find the mastepost linked in the top bar on my blog under SKAMIT: EVA. Cheers!