#last resort plan being 'find a new job youre only 24 good lord'

[gin-juice-tonic]

i took a shower and now that my hair has been de-greased i have hatched several plans for how to feel less terrible at my job

go team shower, we love shower

[chill-that-ur-inmyhead]

stand by me

1 - Are you one of those people who can watch TV shows and movies over and over again without getting bored?                                                            yes!!! I prefer to water my favs over trying something new, I’d really have to be interested to watch something else

2 - If you drink coffee, do you like it plain or would you rather have something like a latte or something flavoured?                                              latte for sure, preferably a matcha latte (from pret :))))))

3 - How did you used to dress ten years ago? Do you dress in a similar way now?                                                                                                                so aged 11, a lot of stretchy jean jeggings and colourful tops, no elaborate accessorising, very simple and basic and most importantly comfortable 

4 - When you’re grocery shopping, do you buy known brands or are you happy to go with the generic store version?                                                      I can go both ways

5 - Do you have a close relationship with any of your cousins?                  not really

6 - Who was the last person to sleep over at your house? Does this person stay over often or was it more of a one-off?                                                      I had a one night stand last year

7 - Does bad weather put you off going out if you’ve got plans to do so? Have you ever cancelled plans due to the weather?                                  depends if the plans are spent outside but if we are going to a bar or restaurant then the weather wouldn’t stop me

8 - When you’re on vacation, do you prefer doing the typical tourist things, or would you rather explore somewhere off the beaten track?                  typical tourist things but once they’re done I could go off the beaten track

9 - Did your family travel a lot when you were younger?                              we went to places around Europe but never outside of it

10 - When was the last time you went shopping for clothes? Did you get anything decent or find any bargains?                                                          shopping online for clothes, literally had a delivery yesterday, I needed a raincoat

11 - Is it true that accessories can make or break an outfit?                          for sure, I wish 11 year old me knew a bit more about accessorising!!

12 - What is your worst memory from high school? What about the best? worst memories were probs fighting with my friends, it was an awful stressful feeling but the best memories is laughing around with those same friends!

13 - Is there any trait in a potential partner that would be a total deal breaker for you?                                                                                          different sense of humour probably

14 - Do you insist people use coasters if they’re putting drinks down in your house?                                                                                                    nope but I think they do automatically

15 - Have you ever been arrested? Were you guilty of whatever it is you were arrested for?                                                                                          nope never

16 - Name five items on the shelf nearest to you:                                            vinyl player, ben e king record, camera, camera bag, passport

17 - After meals, do you wash dishes up right away, or do you leave them in the sink and do a whole days worth at once?                                        leave them on the side for the dishwasher

18 - What websites do you find yourself spending the most time on? recently, netflix, asos, twitter, tumblr, redit, insta,

19 - Do you still download music and TV shows?                                         sure if I’m going on a long journey I download them to listen to offline 

20 - Does your phone have a good battery life? How long does it last before you need to charge it again?                                                          depending how much I use it but I can usually get through the whole day before I charge it at night

21 - When was the last time you hit snooze?                                                      this morning

22 - Did you ever play The Sims? Which expansion pack was your favourite, if you had any?                                                                                    I used to play Sims castaway but it was ages ago

23 - Are there any popular film series or TV shows that you just don’t get the appeal of?                                                                                                    cooking shows, I find them quite boring and they make me hungry!

24 - As a child, did you receive pocket money or an allowance? How much did you get? Was it dependent on you doing chores of some kind?            yes I think it was £10 a week or something, nope no chores I guess I was lucky

25 - Do you think your parents did a good job of raising you? Would you do anything differently with your own kids?                                                      I’d try and go outside of europe for holidays, but I guess that will depend on my finances and what my children are up for

26 - If something is bothering you, do you have to fix it right away?          my brother is talking to his friend and its really annoyingly loud                        

27 - Are there any household jobs you enjoy doing? If so, what’s the reason that you enjoy those things?                                                      hoovering my room and seeing my floor become cleaner

28 - Do you still live in the area you grew up in? Would you like to live somewhere else one day? Where would you go?                                              I had to move back home after uni but I really want to go back to London once everything resumes

29 - Do you smoke, drink or do drugs? How old were you the first time you tried those things? Do you want to quit?                                                  drinking happened at 15/ 16 and marijuana at 17

30 - What’s one thing that really grosses you out? Is it something you have to deal with anyway? How do you cope?                                                        hair in the shower drain GROSS or I guess anything in the shower drain just grosses me out 

31 - Have you ever grown your own fruits or veggies? Did it work out okay or was it a bit of a failure?                                                                                my padre does! tomatoes and blueberries, used to grow raspberries

32 - Could you ever raise animals only to kill and eat them later on, or would you struggle to kill a living thing you’d formed an attachment to?      If it is my last resort you gotta do what you gotta do

33 - When was the last time you painted your nails?                                        I got my nails done just before lockdown happened last week

34 - If you regularly sit in the same place (on your bed or the sofa, for example) do you have a cupboard or something to keep supplies in so you don’t have to keep moving all the time?                                                              I have a snack tin next to me and a jug of water, been thinking about moving my spare kettle into my room to make teas instead of having to go downstairs but that would be the height of my laziness

35 - Have you ever been a witness to a crime? Did you have to make a statement to the police?                                                                                  nope

36 - Do you prefer Harry Potter or the Lord of the Rings?                          Harry Potter ofc

37 - Do you like to air your house or room out every day to stop it getting musty?                                                                                                                  in the summer yes

38 - Have you ever visited a landmark or place made famous by a TV show or film? Did you go there because it was featured on TV?                            not yet but I want to  

39 - Who taught you how to tie your shoe laces?                                        parents

40 - Do you have any pets? What are they all doing at the moment?              I don’t but wished I did

41 - Do you prefer sweet or savoury snacks?                                                    sweet

42 - What’s the most painful place you’ve ever had a spot? Was it a big relief when you finally managed to squeeze it?                                          forehead spots can hurt like a bitch

43 - Talking of spots, have you ever watched videos like those by Dr Pimple Popper? Do you think that kind of stuff is cool or gross?

44 - When was the last time you attended a bonfire?                                        literally last week, dad had a bonfire for 5th November to remember his mother

45 - Is there anything you wish you enjoyed, but you just struggle with for some reason? Maybe you hate the crowds or the noise?                                I wish I liked running

46 - What’s worse - someone constantly blowing their nose or someone who’s constantly sniffing?                                                                          sniffing

47 - Do you have any genuine phobias? What are they and have you ever done anything to address them?                                                                      nope

48 - Do you hate the feeling of being sweaty and dirty from exercise? Is this something that’s put you off working out in the past?                              I don’t like that it makes my hair gross and that sometimes prevents me from working out

49 - Is there anything “normal” that you have a real aversion to? Like a certain noise or smell or taste?                                                                        I’m not fond of fireworks, high risk low reward imo

50 - If you’ve made plans with someone and you really don’t want to go when the time comes, do you suck it up or make an excuse?                          I usually don’t make plans that I don’t wanna go to, I’ll make plans that I can be excited for

51 - What’s your favourite thing to do with each of your parents? Do you get a chance to do that regularly?                                                                Used to go for lunch with my mum most weekends but that doesn’t happen anymore

52 - If you were to adopt a pet, is there anything that would put you off, like a certain colour or breed?                                                                                    If I was to adapt a dog it would be a golden retriever otherwise I just wouldn’t get a dog, for a cat I’m less picky, just no completely white cats and no hairless ones.

53 - Would you ever like to give circus skills a go? What would you be most interested in trying?                                                                        trampolining looks like fun  

54 - What are your thoughts on circuses that allow animal performances? shame shame I know your name

55 - Are there any habits or traditions you’ve picked up from your parents what you’ve carried on in your own home?                                                        I don’t have my own home yet but I’m sure I will

56 - Are there any remakes that you think are better than the originals?    the shrek series and Ice series are strong contenders

57 - How about cover songs? Do you prefer any of those to the original versions?                                                                                                                I used to only listen to the glee version of songs, it was so weird hearing the original

58 - What’s the first movie you remember seeing in the cinema? What about the last?                                                                                                HSM 3 when I was 9 and Pixie at 21

59 - Do you listen to more music, or watch more TV? Is this something that’s changed over the years?                                                                      over lockdown I’ve been really into blasting my music but before then I deffo wated more tv

60 - Do you have any weird fears or worries? Like thinking you’ve forgotten to lock a door or blow out a candle? What do you do to reassure yourself you’ve not forgotten?                                                                            whenever I go somewhere I have to triple check I’ve not left anything - it almost happened to me a couple of weeks ago with my purse and thank god I triple check because I saw it and thought that would have been hell for parallel universe me

[sonyajake]

A Planned Pregnancy, A Semi Planned Surgery and Some Unplanned Weight Loss

It was two years since we got married and we were attending a cousin’s wedding (one of numerous cousins). We were approached by a innocent looking middle aged woman and were asked about our procreation plans. We had no idea who the lady was but tried to brush her off without discussing our family planning measures. Her reaction was to threaten us on behalf of Lord Almighty, “You shouldn’t delay such things, God won’t give you the gift of progeny as per your convenience.” Although we were shocked by her declaration, we let it slide.

Our family planning involved waiting for two years of marriage and then starting to try for kids. So when I conceived right after we completed two years of marriage, it was a pleasant but unexpected surprise. On one hand, we were happy that unlike that lady’s prediction, God decided to bless us at our own convenience. But on the other hand, we were still unprepared for a new life to enter our lives. We found a gynecologist nearby to consult and confirm the news. Her advice when I enquired about consuming non vegetarian food was to depend more on salads and fruits and avoid non veg if possible. The pure non vegetarian in me started hating that doctor right away.

Within a week of confirming pregnancy, my struggle with nausea started. I wouldn’t use the euphemism “morning sickness” for my suffering. It was a 24 hour ordeal with me not being able to keep anything in my stomach. I was living on a diet of rice and curd or chapati and milk. Some of my favorite foods like chicken and chicken liver became my sworn enemies (I still cannot eat liver). Simultaneously I had cravings for Maggi and Chinese food which were on the no go list. Out of sheer pity, my husband used to buy these for me, hoping something would stay in my stomach. One bite, and I would rush to the restroom to throw up everything I ate from morning. We even bought a small stool to keep in the toilet so I could be more comfortable in my long vomiting sessions in there. The doctor discouraged me from medication for vomiting, which made me uncomfortable to consult with her further.

We came to know that there was a gynecologist in our neighborhood who was well known in Mumbai. We went to meet him. One check up and he told me that I have fibroids. The subsequent scan only helped to confirm two fibroids. It was quite scary because I made the mistake of Googling the issues with fibroids. Anyway, the dilapidated condition of the clinic and the fact that the doctor was male(Yes I am a bit conservative in this matter, thank you for the judgment) prompted me to find a new doctor.

By the time I had settled with my new gynecologist I had already lost almost five kilograms in the first four months of pregnancy. I had resorted to wearing thicker clothes to give me a false sense of weight gain. I was concerned that this weight loss was going to hurt my baby. My doctor helped me through this phase and ensured me that things aren’t as bad as I had thought it through in my head. It seems nausea and loss of appetite lasting throughout the pregnancy, even if not common, was not unheard of.

It was from the fifth month that I actually started gaining weight and started enjoying pregnancy (albeit with the help of nausea medicines). But by then, the next problem had started. I used to get constant pains below my chest, making it impossible for me to sit in a place for more than ten minutes. The doctor explained to me that my short stature was not allowing the uterus to expand upwards and was causing the discomfort. Consequently I had to take maternity leave from an early date (I had a desk job-what was the point of going to work if I couldn’t get any work done).

The phase of waiting for the little one to arrive had begun. My short stature also meant that I had an inadequate pelvis (pelvis not expanded enough to push out the baby). So the doctor had already informed us that it would be a planned c- section for me. I had heard stories of how a woman would be an ideal mother only if she survives labor pain. But I was never a fan of being ideal. So I felt no qualms in taking the doctor’s advice and settling for a planned caesarian. Although I was initially told that I was under the risk of early labor due to fibroids, the baby didn’t show any sign of coming out soon.

As per doctor’s advice, we had selected an apt date for the surgery and had packed our bags for admission. Two days before the planned date, while I was taking one of my early morning bathroom breaks, I felt like I had some discharge. I woke up my mother to take her expert opinion and she asked me to wait for some more time. I started spotting soon enough and I decided that it was time to wake up dear husband mine. I woke him up saying we had to get to the hospital soon. He just grumbled and wrapped his blanket tighter. Despite informing him that I had started bleeding, he didn’t seem too keen to be interrupted from his beauty sleep. Finally I had to resort to exhibiting a wiped tissue to make him understand the seriousness of the matter. We reached the hospital soon and after checking I was told that although the water had not broke, I had some infection and the surgery needs to be done soon.

An issue due to nurse duty meant that it was taking too much time for the operation theatre to get ready. By afternoon I had started experiencing labor pains and the baby’s heart beats had started declining. I heard my doctor barking orders to everyone and I was finally taken in for surgery. The baby was taken out a little after 2.30pm- a healthy little girl who resembled her father as though my uterus was a photocopying machine. All the nausea, the weight loss and pains were forgotten the moment I kissed my daughter for the first time.

I have heard people belittle women who have undergone c-section, saying they had it easy and did not have to go through labor pain. But the after surgery recovery pains undergone by caesarian mothers is no less, sometimes even worse. I have never felt any guilt for having to settle for a surgery. In fact, neither me nor my husband wanted to take any risk to chase the glory of a normal delivery. We trusted our doctor to do the right thing. At the end of the day, the only thing that matters is that you have a fine and healthy baby in your arms; the mode of delivery is a trivial matter.

I survived a pregnancy with unbelievably awful nausea, weight loss, UTI, fibroids, ear infection, burnt leg due to a kitchen mishap and an almost emergency surgery. Despite all these discomforts I opted to have another child. So from my experience I can safely say: plan your pregnancies, prepare for unplanned events during pregnancy and keep your fingers crossed for all the best things to happen to you but don’t get disheartened if things turn less than ideal.

Conceive when you feel it is a good time to expand your family. Do not feel bad about taking time for yourself as a couple before deciding to add a new member to your world. Once you are pregnant, don’t allow yourself to be judged by others for the choices you make, lest you want your pregnancy memoirs to leave an ugly imprint in your mind.