#lashing out at Rom who is so much more feminine because in his head he's doing him a favour
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every day I have visions of transmasc Quark and transfemme Rom
#star trek: ds9#quark#rom#Quark who flaunts his misogyny like its a badge of honour both because Thats How Ferengi Men Are#but also because of internalized misogyny#growing up having to constantly prove himself as a Real Man#lashing out at Rom who is so much more feminine because in his head he's doing him a favour#Rom growing up not fitting in with boys but having an easier time with girls#having these longings he doesnt have the words for#getting married and having a child because thats the expectation#I dont think Rom would crack the shell until like. being with Leeta#looking longing at some of her outfits and watching her when she does her makeup#Leeta picks up on it before Rom ever says anything and is like 'hold my hand. lets get you estrogen.'#listen I have a lot of feelings about trans culture on Ferenginar#and how trans people would be viewed#I feel like its a thing thats not entirely acknowledged#but you get a lot of stories of women who 'dressed as men' for their entire lives#men who would go naked- or wear flashy feminine clothing from other worlds#whispers of people making up their own pronouns because I feel like the Ferengi language only has the two genders- male and female#I think its less a case of outright hateful transphobia and more a 'we are not going to acknowledge this and try to ignore it as a society'#I think a lot about trans Ferengi ok.
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Quiet Music: Scherzo (Chapter Six; Part Two)
In collaboration with @bethanysnow
Butterflies getting caught in throats with no words to help explain. Time standing still with a heart breaking. Determination and a willingness to see it through float away in sleep.
Content | Fluff, slight smut warning, tw injury (nothing major, just a wrist injury)
Pairing | fem!Reader x Damiano
Word Count |Â 6644
Shoutout to @damianodavideâ, who was a superb help on this chapter and the real life nurse behind this one ;)Â đ
***
Damianoâs head was spinning. As soon as he closed his eyes, Y/nâs face appeared in front of him, eyes hooded, lips plumps from just having kissed him, and an expression that promised a need for more. It left him bothered in a way that he knew would not let him sleep until he took care of it. Trying to pretend it was her feminine hand instead of his own rather undignified touch, he reached into the waistband of his underwear immediately letting out a hiss at the contact.Â
He was desperate for her, but if he couldnât have her, his imagination would have to do. Pictures flashed through his mind as he moved his hand. Her on her knees, looking up at him through long lashes. He had already gotten a taste of the way she reacted when he complimented her, watching her eyes go wide as he called her a good girl. Her being good for him. Her on her back, ready to be devoured by him in any way he pleased. Feeling his hands go into her hair pulling her face up to look at him. Her bent over whatever furniture he could find, willing to let him have his way with her. Deeply, madly, irrefutably, he wanted it all. She was truly making him lose his mind. Her body and the way she moved were infatuating. Her laugh when someone did something dumb. The look in her eyes when she teased him back. He could still feel the kiss she left on his lips. He never wanted that feeling to end. Brava ragazza mia.
He came with an embarrassingly loud groan, unable to hold back or keep quiet. For a moment, in the silence, he wondered if anyone had heard. He was well aware that his room was surrounded by those of bandmates and crew, but he couldnât remember who it was exactly anyway, and it didnât bother him for long, his hazy mind drifting around once again.Â
***
âWhere is your mind at?â Y/n looked up as Victoria pulled her out of her thoughts unexpectedly. Y/n had stopped in Victoria's room after breakfast, trying to keep tabs on what everyoneâs plans were on their day off. She had meant to get some work done as Victoria was busying herself getting ready, but it had ended up with her staring into the distance, laptop almost forgotten on her lap.
âOh, sorry. Iâm here, what were you saying?âÂ
âI asked where your mind is at.â Victoria fell forward laying on the bed. Y/n knew that the blonde was starting to learn to read her like a book and she wasnât sure if she liked it or not.
âYeah, um, listen. What would you say to someone that may have absolutely decimated her career, by maybe accidentally kissing her boss while they were all high?â She didnât dare look at the bassist, bracing herself for whatever negative reaction would potentially come from this.
Victoria sat up in surprise, eyes wide and the hint of a smile playing on her lips. âIâm going to need a lot more information than that.â Without giving in to Y/nâs slight protest, she removed the laptop from the assistantâs legs, closing it shut and putting it away. âTell me everything.â
âWell, there wasnât much to it really. We sat on the couch, you know that. And I said something stupid about how his eyes looked like chocolates, or maybe gemstones? I donât quite remember. Anyway, then he pulled my hair out of the hair-tie. I went to kiss his cheek, but he turned his face. Fuck, it was bad. Not the kiss! He is very good at that! But I shouldnât have done that. And then he just went âit's cool, it happensâ. What does that even mean?!â She was talking much too quickly, getting it all out before the rational part of her brain would make her shut up. Make her remember she was talking to someone sheâd only just started getting to know a week ago, who she was working for. âThen Thomas crashed and you know how that ended. Now I might be avoiding him. Just a bit.â She looked at Vic with a slight panic in her eyes, unsure if she had said too much.
Victoria, on the other hand, seemed delighted to no end, if a little shocked. âWait, as if you kissed with all of us there and no one noticed!â She exclaimed, briefly pausing, contemplating, but shaking it off to get back to the conversation. âSo⌠Good kiss, huh? Did you enjoy it then? Wanna do it again?â Her eyebrows raised in curiosity.
âVictoria! That is not what I am worried about here! I could lose my job. I- I could never show my face out there again if people found out. And I really enjoy this job, you know!â Her face scrunched a little bit, calming down with a sigh. â...But also, yes, he was a gentleman, and if he wanted to ⌠kiss me again, I probably wouldnât say no. But I also wouldnât say yes. I work for you. This is not the time to be thinking about how much I enjoyed kissing Damiano!â
Her eyes went wide as her voice dropped to a whisper, looking down at her hands. âAh fuck, I said that out loud.âÂ
âOkay, letâs look at it from a rational standpoint then.â Victoria turned slightly more serious at seeing her panic. âThere is no way youâll be losing your job over this. Maybe I wouldnât advise hopping into bed with the whole band and crew, but we always got a tight-knit relationship with people we work with anyway, you know that. None of us would rat you out to management or anything. Plus, if you liked and Damiano liked it⌠wouldnât it be a shame to worry about anything else instead of going for it?â
âI donât know if he liked it. I was busy trying not to pass out, to be honest. I avoided him this morning by going straight to your room. I actually kind of avoided everyone, Iâm scared the words of what happened will just come out to anyone who asks⌠Kind of like they just did with you.â She let out another deep sigh, switching between looking at her nails, picking at them, and out the window. âIf he ...you know ... Then maybe. I honestly donât even know what I would do with that information. On the off chance that he did like it though. And wanted to go for it then Iâd consider it.â She tried to remain as put together as possible and, well aware that she was failing miserably.Â
âWell, in that case, we have to find out what Damiano wants!â Victoriaâs enthusiasm was back with a vengeance. âYou should talk to him! Or should I talk to him? Maybe I should lock you in a room like those romcoms and threaten to not let you out again until you kiss.â
âOr you donât do that because that is entrapment. I think I would be cool with you talking to him. But I still have to do my job. That comes first. Because as far as I am concerned,â Y/n got up and grabbed her laptop again, âit is business as usual. And last night was a fluke. Not to crush your rom-com dreams, love, but if I spoke to him Iâd put my foot in my mouth faster than you can play bass.â
The smirk on Vicâs face didnât promise anything good. âWeâll see about that, weâll see,â she ominously muttered, before jumping up from the bed. âNow stop trying to pretend you got work to do, weâre going vintage clothes shopping.â
***Â
The thrift store turned out to be a small hole-in-the-wall kind of place, just off a side street - perfect for shopping in peace without getting much attention at all. Y/n hadnât been all that keen on keeping the band company for this little adventure, but Victoria had insisted, claiming she needed a female perspective in case the boys were being stupid again. It had only taken a serious case of the puppy dog eyes to win her over, and Victoria found herself making a mental note to remember it.
The store was stuffed full of clothes, a kind of chaos that seemed to have an order that only the owner really understood. But it looked like heaven, and within seconds everyone had vanished into some corner or other, dying to find their newest favourite piece. For a moment, Victoria contemplated who she wanted to follow first, feeling the need to talk to at least two different people but also never wanting to miss out on a chance to go crazy with Thomas. Ended up deciding on Damiano. It seemed the more pressing issue. She hadnât failed to notice how he would try to pretend that everything was normal, yet continuously evading Y/nâs eyes. She had kept her distance all the same. This wasnât acceptable. She had to do something, Victoria decided.
She found the singer shuffling through some blouses, although much more half-heartedly than he tended to be when it came to vintage clothes. Looking out from the racks Victoria saw Y/n doing the same. She briefly considered how to go on about this - admit that Y/n had told her what had happened? Pretend she had actually seen the kiss last night? - but figured that Damiano would start talking on his own accord sooner or later. Especially if this was affecting him the way it was Y/n, and she was almost hoping it was.
âOkay, spill, whatâs up with you today?â
Damiano shrugged, pulling a shirt out from the rack, and holding it against his body, waiting for Victoria's opinion. She raised a brow and put it back wordlessly.
âI donât know what you are talking about,â he responded rather vaguely.
âDamia, youâve barely spoken at all today. Normally you canât shut up. And you know, Iâd be thankful for some peace and quiet from you, but youâre actually worrying me. So whatâs going on with you?âÂ
Damiano had a panicked look on his face as he scanned over the racks of clothes, his eyes flickering back and forth, obviously noticing Y/n shuffling through some things and slowly getting closer. Taking Vic by surprise, he dragged her into the dressing rooms.Â
âOkay, thatâsâŚ. Weirdly intimate, but go on,â Vic mumbled to herself as he closed the curtain behind them, still nervously looking around the small space.
âRather talk to you in here, than her hear me out there. I may have fucked up, royally.â He crossed his arms over his chest and Victoria was sure he would be burning a hole into the wall with his vision if he possessed that power. He was avoiding looking at her and she knew it.
âExplain,â she simply demanded, sitting down on the tiny stool in the corner and looking up at Damiano. She wanted to hear it from him, hear what had happened in his version of the story, hear what was bothering him so much.
âSo we were at that bar, right? Y/n was sitting next to me. I donât know why Iâm telling you this, you were there. Anyway. We were talking. I donât know if it was the smoking or whatever else, but I looked at her and - I donât know why I did this but I did. I pulled her hair out of her hair tie.â He leaned on the wall, his head hitting the brick behind him. He groaned but Vic assumed it didnât have anything to do with the pain. âAnd⌠and she was so beautiful. Her hair just all around her. So soft. And at that moment, she was laughing and it sounded heavenly. And I went to look at her again and suddenly my lips were on hersâŚâ His voice softened at the end, losing his train of thought and drifting. She had never quite seen him like this. âThen she was freaking out, and I told her some fucking stupid line like âit happensâ. I just wanted her to calm down but⌠Now she must think Iâd just...â He groaned, slumping a little and finally looking over at Vic. âThen she ran off to help Thomas.âÂ
âSo, what youâre saying then is that you did enjoy it? Potentially wanna do it again?â She felt transported back to the conversation sheâd had with Y/n just hours earlier, posing almost the exact same question. She had never been this involved with any of her friendsâ relationships to this extent, but something told her that her help was desperately needed in this case.
He raised a brow at her. âDid you not hear the part where after we kissed she then proceeded to freak out? I doubt that she even wants to see my face right now.â A heavy sigh left him and Victoria found herself laying a hand on his arm. âAnd of course I want to kiss her again, Vic. I close my eyes and she is there. Hell, she wakes me up every morning! I canât escape. She is everywhere I go! I turn a corner and she is there. She's the one we go to when wanting to eat, she arranges the cars, she helps us with concerts, sheâs doing everything all the time. I donât know how much more I can take!âÂ
***Â
Y/n stood in the shoe aisle holding a pair of heels in her hand, contemplating for a second, before putting them on. Turning towards Ethan, who was walking towards her now, she realised it had eliminated all height differences between them. Definitely too high, she thought to herself. Holding onto his shoulders, she clumsily took them back off.
âHey Ethan, find anything good?â The smile on her face felt forced but she was praying he wouldnât see it.
He proudly holds up a black, studded belt with an intricate design on it, as well as a pink suede jacket. âHow about you? I think I saw some nice trousers over there that might suit you. Wanna check it out?â
Y/n scoffed. She didnât want to let her mood out on Ethan, trying her hardest to stay diplomatic. âLove the idea, but I doubt any of the clothes in here would go over my thigh. Theyâd fit you guys just great though. The jacket looks good, by the way.â She tried to distract herself from - well, everything - by putting the shoes away, mindlessly letting her fingers wander over the other pairs standing there.
Ethan looked at her in contemplation for a moment, but seemed to decide against following his train of thought. âAt least try on some more shoes. Here, what about these?â He excitedly grabbed a pair of high-heeled boots, very much in the style she could see any of them wearing on stage - much less the one she usually went for when working.
A little intimidated, she took the shoes, if only to humour him. Ethan was nothing but a sweetheart, this was the least she could do. She put them on only with some slight struggle. She once again reached his height, almost amused by the feeling of seeing eye-to-eye with him, but the shoes felt strange. Very far removed from the usual flats, sneakers, boots, or whatever other pair that would allow her to keep running around all day without regretting it in the evening.
âDo I look silly?âÂ
âYou look gorgeous, absolutely gorgeous.â His voice had the most earnest tone to it and it was only supported by the way he studied her, looking her up and down. âMaybe walk a few steps to see if you can get used to it.â
She laughed as she proceeded to strut and partially dance some steps down the aisle to the song playing in the store. âI havenât worn heels in so long, still got it though!â.â Her small smile grew into a grin, rather proud of herself for still being able to keep up. Going to the mirror near Ethan she looked at the shoes, then at herself in the shoes, then back at Ethan. Still, the insecurity took over for a moment. Her voice seemed small when she asked, âYou think so?âÂ
âI wouldnât lie to you like that,â he replied, putting a hand over his heart for emphasis. âWant to go and see what the others think? I saw Thomas over there, and Vic and Dami disappeared into that corner a while ago.â
âRight, good idea.â She walked over to the dressing room looking for Damiano and Victoria, figuring they had gone to try on some things. Well, she was mainly looking for Victoria, still uncomfortable at the thought of facing the singer. She was in the middle of calling out for them when Damianoâs voice seeped through the curtain instead. She didnât mean to listen, only to wait for him to stop so she could interrupt, but the second she realised what he was saying she wished she had never come over.
âHell, she wakes me up every morning! I canât escape. She is everywhere I go! I turn a corner and she is there. She's the one we go to when wanting to eat, she arranges the cars, she helps us with concerts, sheâs doing everything all the time. I donât know how much more I can take!â
She stepped back. Frozen in place. Her heart was beating out of her chest, hurting, aching, breaking just that little bit. Processing what he had said seemed to happen not at all and then suddenly all at once. She couldnât breathe. She needed air. Anything but this suffocation. She needed to leave.
âI need some air.â
The words came out of her mouth much louder than anticipated, but she didnât care. She didnât care that people were looking at her now. She didnât care that was still wearing a pair of shoes that she had definitely not paid for yet. She just needed out, out, out, and away from all this. From him.
She didnât realise she was walking on cobblestone until she wasnât anymore, her ankle giving way, arms desperately trying to keep her from falling as she stumbled.
***
Damiano and Victoria stopped in their tracks as they heard someone approach from outside of the dressing room. Both heads turned towards the sound, when Y/nâs voice came through, telling maybe no one in particular that she needed some air. Her voice sounded strange. Damiano was convinced he had never heard that particular tone in it. As he threw back the curtain, he saw her stumble outside, clearly hectic, and he could feel a surge of panic run through him. Something wasn't right here. He forgot all about the conversation he was having, all about Victoria, and made his way outside. Not quite running, but the worry had him out of the door quickly. His heart sank when he saw her, lying on the floor just outside of the shop, holding her arm awkwardly, some scratches already beginning to bleed a little. As she looked up at him, he could see tears pricking at her eyes.
"Fuck, are you okay? What happened? I just saw-" The look on her face - or rather, the way she turned away from him - shut him up instantly. This wasn't the time to bombard her with questions. It didn't matter anyway. Instead of bothering her further, he quickly knelt down beside her, helping her sit up in return. He was acutely aware of the way she pulled away the second he touched her skin. Like she had been burned. ´
"I'm fine, I'm fine. Sorry to ruin the shopping trip, you can go back in if you want to," she mumbled, trying to wipe some tears away but instead spreading some dirt and drying blood onto her cheek instead. Damiano wanted to touch her, clean her up, dry her tears, but the way she had pulled away a minute ago made him not want to try. The last thing he wanted to do was overwhelm her more. He watched as she pulled out her wallet, handing it to him. "Go pay for the shoes please. And stop looking at me like that, I said Iâm fine."
Yet, as soon as she moved, she winced in pain, taking a deep breath before getting herself up to a standing position. He found himself holding her arm in support, but she only accepted it for as long as necessary. As he let go, she let out a small cry of pain, obviously holding her hurt wrist the wrong way.
âYouâre obviously not fine,â Damiano sighed. He desperately wanted to reach out to her, but she was already in tears, turning away, and it simply didnât seem like a sensible option. He looked around at the others as they gathered around Y/n. Only Thomas was missing, probably still blissfully unaware inside the shop and browsing for clothes. He tossed the wallet to Ethan. âWould you mind paying for her shoes real quick?â Ethan nodded, walking back into the store. Y/n was still standing between them, holding her arm close to her body in a protective gesture. Almost a similar expression to the one she had had on her face on the plane all those days ago. He wondered if something was scaring her the way the turbulence did back then.Â
âI am and will be fine, Damiano.â Her voice was stern. âI cry at a lot of things, this is no different. I wrap it up, put ice on it for a while and Iâm golden.âÂ
He watched as Victoria put a tentative hand on Y/nâs shoulder. She didnât pull away from her touch, he noticed. âY/n, that really doesnât look like nothing. Look, itâs starting to swell up already.âÂ
"What do you want me to do then?" She almost sounded resigned now as she looked back and forth between Damiano and Victoria. "We are in Amsterdam. I don't exactly have a GP on speed dial here. Now, where is Ethan with my wallet?"
She started walking towards the door of the shop, but Damiano defiantly held out his arm to stop her. "We are taking you to A&E."
Her face seemed to drain of all colour, and this time it was not because of the pain. "You are not taking me to a hospital."
Damiano looked at her, determination in his eyes, trying to make her understand that this was non-negotiable. Just for now, he would forget about the way she was brushing him off, the way she was evading his touch, the way she did not even want to look at him. Because right now she needed him and he would be there for her, if she wanted him to be or not.
"Yes, I am. Final decision. You would do the same for us if we got hurt. But we're responsible for you too, you're part of our crew, and right now, being responsible means getting this checked out. Besides, you're not getting your wallet back until you agree."
As soon as Ethan stepped outside again, this time with a slightly confused-looking Thomas in tow, Damiano snatched the wallet from his hands only to put it in his own jeans pocket. She was mad, obviously turning whatever was bothering her into anger, but Damiano was having none of it and he hoped the look in his eyes told her so.
"Fine! Take me to the hospital. But know that I am not happy about this."
"I don't need you to be. I just need you to come with me."
***
A quick refresher of her rudimentary Dutch verified that she was indeed looking for "spoedeisende hulp", another search on the internet confirmed that there was a hospital nearby, and before she knew it, she had been whisked into a taxi with Damiano. The others had decided to make their way back to the hotel, no point in clogging up the waiting room. Damiano promised to call with any news immediately.
Y/n wouldn't tell him, certainly not right then and there but she was happy that Damiano seemed to take the lead for once. She wouldn't have had any problems had any of the others needed medical help - but having people fuss about her? Making her the center of attention in a way she did not intend to be and having to accept help from others?... It was a completely different story. Still she appreciated the way he handled the situation, making sure she got registered with the administration straight away, listening attentively for further instructions, and leading her into the waiting area. She was also glad that it seemed to be quiet, not only because it would result in less of a wait, but also because the bustling would have made her all the more nervous.
This was out of her comfort zone. She had managed to avoid hospitals for the majority of her life, and yet here she was, because she panicked and couldn't handle her shoes. Looking down at them, she wanted to curse them. Curse the fact that they made her walk over to Damiano and Victoria in the first place, curse the fact that she had heard Damiano speak about her that way, curse the fact that they carried her out the door but not much further. She didn't even know where her actual shoes were. Hopefully, Ethan had kept his head and collected them on the way out after paying.
A few seats down, someone coughed loudly, reminding her exactly of where she was. It wasn't the worst hospital she had ever been in, that much was true, but she would rather not see one from the inside at all. She was dying for some comfort, some soothing words, a gentle touch, but as soon as Damiano made any attempt at reaching out to her she pulled back. His words were still heavily playing on her mind, the swelling of her wrist and the heat that seemed to seep from it a painful reminder. There was no way she was going to let herself fall, be reassured and consoled by him when he was so obviously sick of her presence. She wouldn't do that to either of them. Victoria with all her good intentions be damned. At least right now.Â
âWhy are they not calling you in, it doesnât even look like theyâre doing anything,â Damiano grumbled next to her, eyes on the nurseâs station where a few of them were sitting. A few eyes were on them, something that looked like an excited discussion.
âStop it, Iâm sure theyâre busy at work. Just because you canât see it doesnât mean they arenâtâ, she bit back, slightly harsher than intended. He shot her a look, eyebrows raised, but she turned away, not looking to have a deeper conversation.
It left Damiano sitting in silence. Leaving both of them in the same situation, again. Y/n and him alone. Well, alone enough. Alone enough to not have anyone distract her from the uncomfortable feeling that settled over them. No Thomas being silly, no Victoria making a dumb comment, no calming presence of Ethan. Through this whole process, Y/n had basically crawled back into herself. She wished she could disappear.
She didn't know how much time had passed when they were finally called, too preoccupied with her own thoughts and the pain in her wrist. The nurse that beckoned them over had the warmest smile on her face, albeit tired eyes and it surprised Y/n how much comfort she found in the soft expression of the woman. White slacks, rolled up sleeves, pockets so full it looked like they were bursting at the seams, dark hair up in a bun. She found herself looking over at Damiano, wondering if he was aware of how gorgeous this woman was, how kind and calming her aura was, but his eyes were trained solely on her. She didn't allow herself to get lost in his gaze, quickly dropping hers and following the nurse into an examination room.
âHi, Iâm Ana, Iâm going to be your nurse for today. You only speak English, am I correct?â She asked, gesturing for both of them to sit down, Y/n on the examination table and Damiano on a chair next to it. There was a slight twinge of an accent in her speech, but it was clear that she was fluent, which was a relief. Y/n didnât even want to think about trying to get this done with the few words she knew in Dutch. She nodded, gratefully. âWeâre going to go over what happened, and then Iâll do a physical examination, and the doctor will see you after as well.â
Y/n watched as the nurse fumbled with the computer, seemingly already typing things before Y/n had even said anything. âSo, what exactly happened?â
âI, uh, tried on some heels and tripped on the cobblestone outside,â Y/n explained, taking a moment to glare at the offending shoes still on her feet. âFell forwards, tried to soften the blow with my hands and now my wrist looks like this.â She held up the offending arm, gathering that the sight would speak for itself. The dried blood of the little scrapes on the palms of her hand did its best to make it look more dramatic than it felt.
âOh, yeah that looks quite painful,â the nurse winced. âI see youâve scraped your knee as well.â
Y/n looked down, slightly confused, only to realise her jeans had torn, revealing a beat-up knee underneath. Crap, she hadnât even noticed, too occupied with⌠well, everything else. This felt like it was getting worse by the second, she never wanted to get back to a hotel room this badly. She felt like crying, but letting Damiano see her composure waver was the last thing she would allow.
âItâs nothing,â she sighed, moving her legs as if it gave her a chance of hiding her bruises.
âItâs not nothing, Y/n,â Damiano sighed next to her, before turning towards the nurse. âI think itâs more serious than sheâs letting on.â In the same determined tone from before.Â
The nurse looked back and forth between the two of them. âItâs probably the shock of it.â
Oh yeah, the shock. Mainly that of finding out that Damiano didnât want her around, apparently.
The nurse asked a few more questions, time of the accident, previous medical history, medication she was taking regularly, but they barely reached her. She found herself answering curtly, with Damiano filling in where he could. She wouldnât tell him she was thankful for it. Even though the idea of him taking care of her made her emotional.Â
âRight, letâs get that wrist looked at then.â Y/n had feared it would be painful but as soon as the nurse started handling her? She knew it was her job to feel the joints, test her range of motion, move her arm. But unwelcome tears emerged in the corners of her eyes. She didnât have the energy to push Damianoâs hand away, as she almost reveled in the comforting touch on her back. The small talk didnât even begin to make for a distraction. Yet, something was nagging at the back of Y/nâs head as she watched the nurse interact with Damiano. There was a familiarity in her eyes⌠Did she know who he was? Surely not.
âThis will need an X-Ray to make sure itâs not broken,â the nurse concluded, finally letting go of her wrist. Damiano whispered a quiet âYou okay?â over to her, but she couldnât do anything but nod. âI will bandage the scrapes a bit while we wait for a doctor. So, what brings you to Amsterdam today?â
âWork,â Y/n answered, trying to keep some degree of privacy, but Damiano didnât seem to mind butting in immediately.
âIâm in a band, weâre on tour. Sheâs our assistant and overall angel.â She wanted to shoot him a look, both at the unnecessary honesty and the over-the-top way he was describing her, but a touch to her banged-up knee distracted her.
A doctor popped into the room quickly verified everything the nurse had told him And before she knew it she was being led down a hallway to get an X-Ray. Damiano stayed behind in the room.
âCute couple, the two of you,â the nurse piped up next to her.
âUm, yeah, no. Not a couple. Just a working relationship.â
âYou sure about that?â
Y/n almost wanted to stop dead in her tracks, ask the nurse what on earth had given her that idea, but she also knew she was here to get examined and the last thing she wanted to do was annoy the person responsible.
âVery. He doesnât like me like that, heâs made that crystal clear.â
âWell, he certainly doesnât look like you in a way that suggests he doesnât like you. If anything, I would have guessed he was head-over-heels for you.â
Y/n was stumped for a reply. Was this woman making fun of her? She didnât look like someone who would. So why would she say these things? With a deep sigh and a heavy heart, Y/n decided she would have to talk to Damiano at some point. Have him either stand by his statement and back off, or explain what the hell he was doing. Because she was starting to lack comprehension about any of it.
She was glad the rest of the appointment seemed to fly by in a hurry, or maybe Y/nâs brain had simply gone into power-saving mode, not really taking it what as happening around her anymore. Her exhaustion was tangible. The X-Ray was done quickly enough, someone sent her back to the examination room, and before she knew it, the doctor had announced that it was, in fact, not broken. A quick wrap around her wrist, some instructions on how to care for it (that Damiano seemed to listen to more closely than she did), and she was almost out the door. She was sure she would have fallen asleep on the examination table. It was only the nurse quickly saying her goodbye and adding another comment that almost threw her off balance again.
âBye, guys. And by the way, nice show yesterday. I promise I wasnât the one who threw the bra.â
***
It was dark out by the time Y/n and Damiano made it back to the hotel. He had made sure to text the others, telling them to go for dinner without them, theyâd be fine, and he figured she would need some rest. The hotel restaurant was quiet enough and he motioned towards it, but Y/n shook her head.
âIâve got a few snacks in my room, but honestly, Iâm not hungry at all. I just want to go to bed.â
Yet, tired as she was, it only took one pointed look for her to shut him up, so he simply nodded and led her towards the elevators.
âAt least let me bring you to your room and see if you need any more help. And I can give you your wallet back.â
He could tell in the way she stiffened next to him, the way she barely reacted to his words, that she wasnât keen on the idea, but he wouldnât let her get away with it. He was desperate to find out what was bothering her and why she was so distant, but he couldnât figure it out. Was the kiss still playing on her mind? Was she uncomfortable with him? It was the last thing he wanted. He needed to show her he was willing to be there for her.
Closing the door of her room behind him, a shout rang through the room.
âThese fucking things, I hate them!â She was loud and angry while trying to get her shoes off, but her voice was wavering and if he watched her in just the right light he was convinced he was seeing the beginning of tears forming in her eyes.
âShh, shh, itâs fine,â he tried to soothe, unsure if he was going about it the wrong way, but quickly bending in front of where she was sitting on the bed. She kicked her heels once more in frustration, obviously unable to get them off with her wrist still compromised.
âDonât shush me when itâs all your fault,â she whispered and he almost stopped dead in his tracks, but he figured she hadnât meant for him to hear. He stayed quiet, against everything in his heart telling him to find out what she was talking about. Instead, he focused on removing her shoes, gentle touches against her bare skin. Looking up at her, he realised that she was studying him, watching his every move, and he concentrated even harder on being the perfect gentleman. Yet, when he pulled the second shoe off her, he couldnât help letting his hand rest on her calf a little longer than necessary.
âCome on, letâs get you into some pyjamas,â he decided, getting up and putting some distance between them. Too afraid of getting ahead of himself, of letting his hands wander more than appropriate places, of saying something he shouldnât. He threw what he gathered to be her sleepwear in her general directions. âIf you need any help changing because of your wrist, let me know.â
He hoped his smile was as sincere as he meant it. Either way, she didnât give him much of a reaction, grabbing the clothes and disappearing into the bathroom. A few sharp hisses reached him through the door, but he knew better than to offer his help again.
He wasnât sure what the acceptable place for him to sit was, but since the room didnât offer anything but a worn-out armchair and the bed, he decided that choosing the far side of the mattress wasnât too bad. He didnât even realise she had left the en-suite until her voice reached him.
âWe really need to talk, Damiano.â She sounded resigned and tired and he wished he could wrap her in his arms and tell her everything was alright, but it didnât seem like the right time. As soon as she reached the side of the bed opposite him, she all but collapsed on it. She sleepily grabbed one of the many unnecessary hotel pillows they placed on the bed and nuzzled her face into it.Â
âThere will be more than enough time for that tomorrow,â he replied, grabbing the blanket and making sure she was fully covered by it. âItâs been a long day, try to get some rest.âÂ
She didnât even manage to argue anymore, eyes already fluttering closed, breathing slowly becoming more steady. She was gorgeous like this. A soft calm overtaking the scene. No wall up that kept everyone else from her inner thoughts. No front that she put up in desperate attempts to remain professional. Just a softness etched into her features that highlighted her natural divine beauty.
He wanted to take her worries away. He hoped that whenever they did get to talk tomorrow, it would yield some clarity. The last thing he wanted was for her to ever feel this way. He had grown so attached to her, so obsessed with the idea of having her around, that he already feared the end of the tour. If she would give him any option to stay in her life, he would take it, whatever way it was.
Damiano barely noticed the way he was slipping down on the mattress, his fingers softly patting her head, eyelids getting heavy. The last thing on his mind was Y/n, sleeping soundly next to him and wishing for nothing but to make her happy.
***
Taglist | @damianodavide @lizstans @its-afucking-mess @ethaneskin @dont-let-me-drown-in-you @vampirtet @lividisuigomiti @juststalking @tabi-toast @ethan-torchio-angelo @cheese-toastie-11 @thewitchinthemountain @ethanesimp @sofckinelectric @man3skin @daddydamiano @finelinejpm @superchrystaldrug @ginny-lily @nientedaridere @rainbowmarta @tiaamberxx @shaunthesheesh @enjcltaire @rocketqueen @aleksanderwh0r3 @damianodavidhands @megann-duff @teatrodellavita @coven-daddy @till-you-scream-and-cry @solasullabarca @fanfictionandfluff @makapaka11 @slave4yourlove @geklutst-ei @marriedwithmarktuan @bookish0918 @mehrmonga @kanevill @butterfly-skinnylegend @lidiyabest @killerqueen1985 @ccweasley @bluscryn @deluxeplanteater @ohtorchio @messyhairday-me @bidet-and-legolas @maybanksslut @katyldamusic @fuckim-so-gay @demoiselle-en-detresse00 @petit-poussin @fedorable-killjoys @luvbadass @buttercup-beeee @navs-bhat @etaerealboyv @tryymebitch @mell-bell @fenhakwe @solacestyles @softforlukescurls @vicsangel @theimpossiblehologramtree @alina-exe @cherricola66 @supercorp-mari @onlykissystyless @thatonebraziliangirl @dannasixxworld @immrbrightside @lifeofa-fangirl @gr8rainbowpunk @que--sera--sera @unitersmoonshine @achillevelenoâ
#maneskin fiction#damiano david imagine#damiano david x you#damiano david x reader#damiano david fiction#maneskin imagine#maneskin x you#maneskin x reader#quiet music#bethanysnow#mywriting
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Spill your heart out about Walter.
Okay so I basically got this question in what, January?? but Iâm answering it now since I just rewatched the movie and have inspiration, sorry for the late reply Anon
Okay so, to start off this post with some keyboard smashing because that my primary go-to for expressing my emotions
sgklhfsgjksdlgdghkjlgjhOHUFLUSKHDGSLIDRGKJGKFSDHGlhjglksdhkglshglllllfa. knjcthxiudhusmnvsoidhĂŠytbvonjyxclkkvbr. haeylicfvshdkgikc
HANDSOME BOY. HANDSOME. âNUFF SAID.
I could legit stare all day at his beautiful face⌠look at him. Enchanting sky blue eyes⌠fluffy, wavy brown hair, cute round cheeks, lovely smile⌠those hidden freckles that you can hardly spot and only in certain screenshots but nevertheless theyâre there to raise the cuteness factor⌠ALSO HIS LASHES. MAYBE ITâS NATURAL?? MAYBE ITâS MAYBELLINE?? WE SHALL NEVER KNOW
Here you may be able to spot the freckles if you squint hard enough. I have 77 screenshots but this is the best example I could find.
Secondly⌠well, heâs a sticc. A short sticc at that (though still slightly taller than me bc Iâm smol), but a sticc regardless! And that seems to be the most attractive cartoon body type for me. Donât judge me, I just have a thing for twinks, Iâm⌠twinksexual or whatever.
Look at him! He would fit through my doorcrack.
(Maaaybe the reason for me liking sticcs so much is partially the fact that I like the idea of a boyfriend I can protect and support, physically and emotionally. Iâm mad at the universe for not letting me scoop him up in my arms bridal style and smooch the HECK outta him.)
Iâve encountered a few posts that claimed heâs got cake but, come on. That concept has canonically been proven to be false, even by Lance. This man is flat and you can pry this opinion off my cold, dead hands.
Speaking of hands! I like his big ol hands. Nice shape. They look soft. I wanna hold them.
According to a DVD commentary, and the visual facts, he has no shoulders whatsoever. Back in Venice Killian was able to restrain him effortlessly with only one foot on his chest, even as he kept struggling ans squirming and generally put in as much effort as he possibly could. Before then, he claimed the database was the first thing he has ever caught in his life.
Conclusion, our boiâs very much NOT athletic. Which makes sense for a scientist, braining all day and stuff, and because he probably barely even eats, or sleeps which are by the way both pretty concerning implications but anyway.
STOP BEATING UP THIS POOR FRAGILE LAD FOR GODâS SAKE. Makes me want to protect him even more. Thatâs not necessarily a bad thing, but you get what I mean.
Now, on to the actual reason Iâm so head over heels for him, a.k.a his personality.
He is one of the sweetest, kindest, purest boy characters I have ever seen in fiction, if not THE number one himself. (All my other cinnamon roll crushes are, or have been a villain at some point and WILL resort to violence if provoked.) Look at him, his pacifism⌠is unbreakable. Heâs dead set on making the world a better place, by peaceful ways, and helping humanity. If thatâs not a quality to be cherished then IDK what is.
And heâs just such a refreshing character. He likes pink, K-dramas, glitter, kittens, things that arenât traditionally âmasculineâ (but is never made fun of those things in particular in the movie) and I love that. Nothingâs sexier than a man whoâs, despite societyâs shitty standards, openly and unashamedly himself!
His femininity is, if anything, just another turn-on. (This didnât intend to sound sexual⌠but oh well.) I love his little hand gestures and mannerisms, dorky ramblings, the way he says âyepâ popping the âpâ at the end, all the small yet significant traits that were incorporated into his character. Bless you, SiD creators, bless you.
Have I said that heâs a genius?? Which is pretty obvious but câmon, he graduated at 15!! He can modify human genes!! He successfully turned a man into a pigeon on the first try!! (The serum wasnât the first prototype but we can assume he didnât experiment on living humans with the previous ones.) And heâs still just 20!! Like what is that if not hella fucking impressive???!??
His inventions, to the untrained eye, may seem âstupidâ or âchildishâ but alas! The observer couldnât be more wrong! Because despite the odd designs and themes theyâre all highly effective, as we have witnessed in the battle against Killian. And he is extremely creative for coming up with such ideas! Told you heâs brilliant!!
Which makes me all the sadder about how much they underappreciated him at the agency. In his words, nobody ever listened to him, or gave him a chance. They just left him and his âweirdâ ideas next to the menâs bathroom and called it a day. How could they be so blind? Didnât they see the potential in his inventions? Oh well. Maybe Iâm just being a smartass bc I have more knowledge, living outside that universe. But Iâm totally right.
And I was honestly ready to throw hands with Lance for hurting the boi even further. (Iâd stand no chance whatsoever, but still.)
Oh no baby please donât cry.
He did cry in that scene though⌠you could see a tear rolling down his cheek and if it wasnât for the machine beeping⌠He did have a pretty rough day afterall. But HEY, if we dwell on it too much the scene loses its comedic effect!! A guy gets sad over a stupid soap opera, har har har!! Now letâs move on, keep it fast and snappy for the kids, donât let them overthink it!! Canât have any emotional breakdowns onscreen. Keep it lighthearted yâknow. Then letâs kill a random side character and have our dear protagonist almost die twice.
(Well jokes on you Blue Sky! Iâm no kid, but a devoted fangirl who can and will overthink any material of my fictional faves at any given opportunity.)
You know what else I love about him though?? His love for animals!! And pigeons, especially Lovey!! He loves her so much, gives her gluten free breadcrumbs, nuzzles her, the first thing he does when he finds out Lance can talk to the pigeons is ask if she loves him too!! Like⌠Thatâs so pure and wholesome.
This here. THIS RIGHT HERE. BROTP forever.
(Not gonna lie, I used to be crazy for pigeons for like, an entire year or something. Not as in looking up all the facts there are about pigeons as I do nowadays with cartoons, but Iâd feed them regularly and write my little observations on their behaviors. Did you know they sometimes scratch their neck with their leggies like dogs do?)
I think Iâve summed up mostly everything I love about this nerd. Oh wait, almost forgot the sass!! I love how sassy and smug he can be sometimes, in like, a really harmless way but itâs still a very nice characteristic.
Since Iâve ran out of coherent things to say, hereâs an incomplete list of things I want to do to Walter Beckett. Put at the end of this post so those of you who were only here for the analysis part and not the selfshippy gushing donât have to read further:
kiss he
like seriously
just kiss he a whole lot
cover his whole face in kisses
one kiss for each of his freckles. a finishing kiss onto the tip of his nose. then repeat the cycle
hug him. hug him like the world is ending. hug him so tight he can barely breathe
then ofc let go and apologize bc I would never hurt him on purpose
cuddle him
hold him close, let him lay his head on my chest
run my fingers through his hair
listen to his breathing
discover that heâs fallen asleep on me and smile fondly, then soon drift off to sleep myself so we can wake up entangled in eachother the next morning
fuck he
pin him to a wall and snog he
make him go cherry red
fluster he
compliment him. praise him. appreciate him. heâs a prince, a hero, an angel, a wonderful human being and he needs to know this
feed pigeons together
listen to his scientific ramblings and bird facts
write him love letters and give them to him. maybe read it aloud myself if Iâm feeling brave so I can see his reaction in real time
serenade he
be the love of his life, and have him be mine
just⌠soft things, man
cook something for this malnourished sticc
make him small handmade gifts
theyâre nothing like his gadgets but I tried
draw he
have him be my muse in general
not like he isnât now but it would be lovely if he was real too
carry him bridal style
be the feral cryptid that lurks in his house when he isnât around
sing along to cheesy pop-song together really badly
watch cheesy rom coms
flirt with eachother clumsily until weâre both laughing at our awkwardness
or, alternatively, shower him with compliments until he literally cannot handle it
have sleepovers together
give him hand kisses
be of emotional support
#picpost#fangirl#walter beckett#F/O#didn't plan to make an entire essay#though on the other hand I exactly knew this would happen
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Billy calling Steve baby is my /kink/
LISTEN đđđ there are few things in life I love more than Steve being Billyâs baby and knowing heâs Billyâs baby.
It definitely starts as a dick-ish, condescending thing Billy doesâ just like canonically with âpretty boyâ and (basically) canonically with âPrincess.â It starts out intended as an insult from Billyâ probably Steve did something overly relationshipy and Billyâs channeling his fear of commitment and being vulnerable and not thinking he deserves love and Steveâ into being a total and complete asshole, so when Steve like tries to cuddle after sex or something super minor but outside Billyâs usual MO of fuck and leave, it makes Billy nervous how much he also wants that, and when Billyâs nervous or scared or just uncomfortable in any way, he gets mean as hell, so he lashes out at Steve and says something caustic and biting and tacks on a cold, pointed âbabyâ at the end as if itâs absurd Steve could ever think Billy would want anything besides sex from him and to like really drive home his point that this thing between them is in no way a cute, romantic relationship out of a rom com where they call each other dopey shit like âbabyâ.
And after that time, Billy doesnât use it as meanly as he did before, but he does use it to tease Steve when Steveâs trying to be this perfect boyfriend type and Billy just has to roll his eyes and tell him to stop being so heterosexual and just fuck him already. And this is nice and good and easy because itâs just another tool in Billyâs arsenal of taunts he can call Steve simply to see Steve squirm. But unlike with âpretty boyâ or âprincess,â Billy starts to notice that when he teases Steve with a sarcastic âbabyâ here and there, Steve gets flustered not because heâs annoyed but because it gets him hot and bothered.Â
âPretty boyâ is annoying because although he knows Billyâs just pulling on his pigtails, it sometimes strikes a nerve by highlighting the more feminine things about Steve heâs still not sure how to accept within himself since heâs having his gay awakening in rural middle America during the 1980s ripâ how soft his hair is and how pink his cheeks get and how large his eyes are and how soft his lips are, all things that donât characterize hardened, calloused Billy. But âbabyâ makes him squirm and flush in a different way because itâs something no one else has ever picked up on before. Unlike âpretty boy,â which comes with its own history of Steve as a child being bullied by other boys on the playground for being too soft and put together and, well, pretty, âbabyâ is something new, something totally unexplored before. With all the girls heâd been with, they were âbabyâ, heâd call them that because, well, thatâs whatâs expected. He knew he was supposed to be the big tough man in the relationship and they were the sweet, soft baby who needs to be taken care of and protected, and he never questioned that gendered role in his relationships because it never even crossed his mind that he could question it.
So when Billy starts increasingly taunting Steve with randomly thrown in âbabyâs, it makes something blossom warm and deep inside Steve he never knew he was longing for: this reassurance that itâs okay to not always be put together, that he doesnât always need to be looking out for others and putting others before himself because heâs got someone there who will look out for him. Because as Iâve said before, Steve is a born protector, and you can see in all of the seasons how he will put himself in the face of danger, stepping in front of and taking the monsters head on, so that the people he cares about are shielded behind him. Also in the whole characterization of âsingle mom Steveâ we all love so much from season 2, we see how much of a worrier he is, and thatâs how heâs been his whole life, left in a big empty house all alone heâs learned to fend for himself of course but not without the side effect of over thinking everything and constantly worrying if everything is okay.
But once Billy realizes that Steve like really truly likes being called âbabyâ it makes sense to him, and he uses it more frequently than any other name he has for Steve, because really, heâs selfish and canât get enough of the soft, shy smile that always creeps onto Steveâs face when Billy calls him baby.
So anyway, I donât even know what this ask turned in to because I just frickin went off there, but TLDR come into my inbox anon and scream with me about Steve being Billyâs baby because thatâs like my favorite thing ever
#welp wtf did i even just write#i just got so heated so fast#because i love steve being soft and needing to be shown how loved and cared for he is#and billy loving steve more than anything but not always knowing how to show that love or act upon emotions that aren't anger#harringrove#headcanons#drabbles#steve is billyâs baby#thanks anon#my thots
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How the Costumes and Makeup of 'Promising Young Woman' Shape Perception
Mild spoilers for Promising Young Woman below.
If the pen is mightier than the sword, then in Promising Young Woman, the inkâs been replaced by lipstick. As Cassie (Carey Mulligan) channels her anger, grief, and guilt over the death of her best friend into a one-woman mission to punish men (and women) complicit in rape culture, the gulf between appearance and motivation is vast. In contrast to a spy who dresses to blend in, Cassieâs undercover attire is a flashing beacon that lures in her prey, and her ability to shapeshift through the local nightlife scene is made possible by the clothes, makeup, and hairstyles she adopts to appeal to her targets. Each undone button and crinkle is part of the overall ruse, and Cassieâs revolving closet is as purposeful as her imperfectly applied eyeliner.
Courtesy
Costume and makeup are essential to every production, but writer-director Emerald Fennellâs debut feature puts a premium on surface-level perceptions that a so-called âhot messâ projects. From the first pulpy poster imageâwhich featured an illustrated Mulligan lying in an oversized mouth, lip color dripping like bloodâthe emphasis is placed on the trappings of femininity. Cassie is counting on superficial snap judgments as she walks a very dangerous path with little protection beyond a strapless bodycon dress and high heels.
ELLE.com spoke to costume designer Nancy Steiner (The Virgin Suicides, Twin Peaks: The Return) and makeup department head Angie Wells (Sylvieâs Love, Mudbound) about creating distinctive looks to support Fennellâs vision. âThe makeup itself [and] these disguises were their own character,â Wells says. â[Cassieâs] using it in a way thatâs very controlled.â
Business Casual
Brian Valenzuela/Courtesy
âShe is dressed as a business chick,â Steiner explains of the movieâs opening scene, which sees Cassie slumped in a red booth, feigning intoxication to attract the attention of businessmen gathered for post-work drinks. Fennell specified each location for Cassieâs hunt in the script, which provided Steiner with a wealth of costume inspiration. Itâs notable that we only see Cassie wear each âdisguiseâ once: Steiner estimates Mulligan had approximately 35 changes in total.
On the makeup side, smudges and a clammy complexion all point to Cassieâs âinebriatedâ state. âI love doing imperfect things like that,â says Wells. Using techniques we try to avoid IRL, the makeup artist made Mulligan apply the mascara herself. âWhile it was wet, I said, âplease close your eyes really tightly,â which makes a mess.â Wells used a damp brush to smear the mascara around her eyes. To get the flushed, blotchy skin effect, she changed her brush technique: âI stippled the blush on in a spotty way, so itâs not this smooth-skin look.â
Daytime Cassie
Brian Valenzuela/Courtesy
When not hunting her prey, Cassie masks her pain in saccharine pastels. Steinerâs own resume is filled with girlish references that suggest a happy facade while concealing the filmâs major themes; in an interview with Little White Lies, Fennell referenced Steinerâs âbeguilingâ work in The Virgin Suicides and the daytime aesthetic she envisioned for her own heroine: âCassieâs clothes are very tactile: soft; pink; inviting.â For Steiner, âIt was a lot about the color palette of that pastel. A little bit of contemporary shopping, costume house, a little thrift, and then put it together.â Even though the story is contemporary, Steiner mixed and matched influences from the 1960s onward for Cassieâs daytime wardrobe. Her collection of cheery gingham, floral, and delicate prints are a disguise. âItâs her, âIâm happy, donât look at meâ [look],â Steiner says. âItâs a barrier as well.â
And her makeup is much more subtle. âI wanted there to be a real difference between Cassie in her regular, everyday life and who she became when she would go out and do these disguises,â Wells says. With a âvery natural, very cleanâ face, the artist didnât want viewers to notice the makeup. This blank canvas offered plenty of room for experimentation with the bold nighttime looks.
âHomemade Kardashianâ
Brian Valenzuela/Courtesy
âI call it the âDouchey Eurotrashâ look, and that is the strapless dress and high heels where she transforms into somebody really different,â Steiner says of this particular nightclub attire. The âHomemade Kardashianâ nickname came about as Wells read the script: she immediately thought of the famous familyâs signature contouring. âI didnât want it to look like a professional makeup artist had done it,â she says. âI wanted it to look like she had done it herself, so I didnât blend the contour perfectly.â
The Smeared Lipstick
Cassieâs application of her cosmetic war paint follows a relatable endeavor: turning to the internet for techniques. Watching a âblowjob lipsâ tutorialâFennell cameos as the beauty vloggerâCassie nails the bold look before dramatically smearing the dark shade across her face. This was a âcollaboration between props and makeup,â Wells explains, recalling that Mulliganâs purposeful makeup misapplication took two or three takes. The film was shot in just 23 days, and time constraints meant there was a limited window for resetting the scene.
In the following scene, Fennell depicts the encounter with ânice guyâ Neil (Christopher Mintz-Plasse) at his apartment rather than the trendy bar where he met Cassie. This particular costume is not in focusâSteiner points out that âyou donât really see much of what sheâs wearing thereââand the makeup choice is darker than the opening scene, a reflection of Cassieâs state of mind. âSheâs starting to spiral down a little bit: sheâs getting sadder, sheâs getting heavier, itâs getting deeper,â Wells says. âThe look was getting a little bit dark.â The deeper red isnât the only cosmetic choice for this underlying despair. âI even turned her eyeliner down to kind of pull her eyes down,â Wells says.
The Candy-Colored Mani
Regardless of time of day or activity, Cassie is always wearing the same eye-catching manicure. This was a direct request from the director. âEmerald was very specific with the nail look she wanted,â recalls Wells. âAnd she wanted that to carry throughout.â Changing nail art can be a logistical nightmare, Wells says, so she was grateful the look remained the same throughout the film. âWe were able to do them with gels, and they could stay on for a couple of weeks, and then Carey would go and get them redone.â
This striking nail polish choice is the unifying factor between the makeup and costume color palettes, complementing both Cassieâs daytime barista attire and all her disheveled drunk personas. Early in the process, Wells sent Fennell inspiration images, then connected with Steiner, looking at the color and shapes of each costume to coordinate the individual makeup looks. Wells also brought hair department head Daniel Curet onto the film. âIt was a group effort to create [Cassieâs entire] look,â Wells says.
Drugstore Dance
Brian Valenzuela/Courtesy
Frequently switching sartorial personas means Cassieâs authentic style is hard to pin down, but Steiner explains one costume captures her essence more than any other: the âcute vintage piecesâ which feature in the Paris Hilton âStars Are Blindâ sing-along. As Cassie dances down the aisles with Ryan (Bo Burnham), Promising Young Woman briefly turns into a rom-com. âThat little number in the pharmacy is more her,â Steiner explains. âItâs not pastel, itâs a brighter color. I really love the little cardigan. Itâs not saying anything necessarily, but itâs different from everything else.â
The thrifted knitwear also ties to Steinerâs earlier work designing for music videos during the glory days of MTV, including Nirvanaâs âCome as You Are,â which features Kurt Cobain in an iconic green cardigan. But Steiner is quick to note she didnât invent that look: âEverybody was wearing thrift store cardigans,â and Cobain âhad a lot of cardigans.â While Cassieâs moment of levity in the drugstore does have a pop video sensibility, Steiner says, âI canât say anything specifically informed me from video daysâ when conceiving this scene. âI think my aesthetic from my life has informed my choices.â
A Nurseâs Disguise
Brian Valenzuela/Courtesy
Cassieâs most extreme costume is, without a doubt, the stylized nursing attire that ties together her medical student past and present vengeance vocation. âWe knew we wanted a hot, sexy nurse costume and I did a little research online,â says Steiner. Production needed multiple versions of the garment, so Steiner custom-built it to her exacting specifications, from the sleeve and skirt lengths to the zippered front
For Wells, rather than match the crimson hard-to-walk-in stilettos (Mulliganâs socked feet were protected with moleskin fabric for navigating the long driveway), she used the pastel wig and candy nails as inspiration. âRed is always the color if you think of femme fatale,â she says of Cassieâs edgy, sexy lipstick. âI wanted pink because red is so expected.â The makeup artist opted for an intense pink using MACâs âRoyally Flushedâ pencil shade that has since been discontinued, but MAC told her a near-substitute is the lip pencil Beet. â[I] totally filled her lips in with the pencil, and then we put a little bit of lipstick [MACâs All Fired Up] on top of it to solidify the look.â
âOnce I looked at the outfit, and I realized what she was going to be doing in that scene, I thought of a blow-up doll,â Wells recalls. Dialing into the big eyes and full mouth concept, Wells exaggerated the size of Mulliganâs eyes using several techniques. âI purposely went below Careyâs natural eye-line to make her eyes look huge, then I filled in on the waterline with a flesh-colored pencil, which makes the whites of your eye appear larger,â she says. âWe put lashes beneath the waterline so everything was designed with this big eye, strong lip lookâbecause eyes and lips are the places where people look.â Cassie is nearly unrecognizable. Wells captured the transformation via makeup on a timelapse video: âAs it starts out, she has such a sweet face. At the end of the video, itâs like, âWow! Itâs a whole different person.ââ
Emma Fraser Emma Fraser is a freelance culture writer with a focus on TV, movies, and costume design.
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How the Costumes and Makeup of 'Promising Young Woman' Shape Perception
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