#lark is supposed to be the sappy one

[palialaina]

Me and Jellybean just enjoying the new fireplace~!

Man, my house is getting to be so comfortable! I've still got some empty space, but like..

I am really happy with how comfortable I feel in it. And I've started looking into those modifications Tish told me about forever ago. Nobody told me I could turn my furniture pink!

Jel's been happy that I've been able to hang around more, since I'm not busy with a million other things. Well, I mean, I'm busy (I will find all the stuff for the Fish constellation, I will, I will) but not so busy that I can't come pester him.

Honestly, I may be forming something of a bad habit. But who better to go to than the local will-definitely-be-famous-you-dramatic-bastard tailor?

It's just... I dunno. Easier to convince myself I'm pretty after Jel's helped me come up with something to wear. He swears I look good no matter what, which is sweet, but I get anxious about it. It's kind of dumb, but it really makes me happy when he helps me put together something that is comfortable to me, and stylish in his eyes.

Although, it does lead to some hilarious words. He told me a bit ago that he'd been thinking about me. Which he then corrected to dressing me. And then he turned very purple and scampered off, and I had to find a bench and sit down because I was laughing so hard.

He's so wonderfully awkward, and just so dramatic. Tish told me he'd been down for a bit, and I definitely got a letter to that effect to, though uh...

I really don't think he thought about haw 'scandalous' that would be. He must've been way too distressed to actually read over the letter. (Lark looked at it with me, we were hanging out, and they agreed that it sounded a bit, uh... dramatic as well as other thing.)

I still wish Reth had given me the actual capanes recipe though. But I get keeping some recipes to yourself. I've been trying to experiment with bread, because I swear if I add something to it, I can make cookies, but I don't seem to be doing it right.

Good thing I can grow my own wheat. Sheesh.

But after I got him the capanes, Jel sent me that ornate mirror now in my bathroom. It's very.... extra, and I didn't know what to do with it at first. Then I figured I could use the small mirror to check my hair, and the large mirror to check the whole outfit.

Honestly, I admit, I can't bear to throw out anything he sends me. Ugh. I suppose I'm just as sappy as he is.

I've also gotten to be closer friends with Einar. I think. He's... weird, but I like him being weird? Iunno. I'm still not big on this whole fishing Oneness thing, but like...

So, Einar said he wanted to keep fishing, but he'd found an amazing pebble for his collection. And just... asked me to put it in his place. Einar lives in the bluffs. Literally in the bluffs. What the heck???

It's an interesting home, but it doesn't seem like a comfy place. Maybe that's cause I'm human? I dunno... Anyways, he had all sorts of things scattered about, logs from the person who created him apparently. I guess he's unique among Galdur, which does sort of track. Hekla is super focused on taking care of Jina, but Einar's always loved the shiny pebbles while also loving fishing. Apparently he names the fish too, which is cute.

(That reminds me, I need to go find some trout so I can cook up that dumb fish dinner. He had the recipe hidden in his cave!)

But I did that, and he thanked me, and I dunno. He's sweet in a weird way.

Dad was also really contemplative earlier too. He told me that even though he has plenty fo friends, I'm the one he really has opened up to. Maybe it's because I'm not Majiri, and can give him an outside perspective on things? Either way, I told him he was the best not!Dad I've ever had, and he looked really happy about that.

(So far, managing to not call him Dad to his face is going well! I only slipped up, uh..... twice? So far. Fortunately, he found me going Daaa....shura?" funny, so maybe I can get away with it? Heck, call him Dadshura or something!)

Honestly, the more I get to know Zeki, the more curious I get. He seems like a little conman who shouldn't care about anyone, but he's honestly not a bad guy. He has friends, he even intended to stick up for one! (Sure, they were running some sort of smuggling racket, but still.) But the Order decided his friend was guilty without a trial which... that doesn't seem right. But apparently that's how the Order works?

It makes me worry about Auni a bit. He wants to join the Order, but he's such a good kid too... Either they'd break him and he wouldn't be Auni any more, or he'd wash out and hate himself for failing in his Path like Reth does.

I kind of hope asking Dad eventually to be my Shepp won't mean I'm declaring this Path thing. Because being perfectly honest, if I did, it'd be more along the lines of Uncle B's life. I really enjoy the farming, and being able to dig my hands in the earth and figure out how to make sure everything grows all nice and useful!

Unrelated, I think Tish is over her... pettiness or jealousy, or whatever, cause she showed me a set of furniture she thought Jel might like called Moonstruck, and also gave me some of the blueprints! They're admittedly almost as bad as the Bellflower stuff for needing Flow-infused boards, and Palium, and goodness knows what else, but wow. They're pretty. It's almost enough to make me want to go goth style.

But I do not want to spend all my time chasing down flow trees and hunting Palium. No thank you. Homestead is enough for me.

Oh, though I have to remember to stop buying the cool stuff for a bit (Unless Zeki comes up with an awesome bathtub....), because Tish showed me the copper storage box upgrades and I really need more space for all the stuff I'm kind of.... hoarding.

I'm not really sure what to do with my free time right now, and it's left me wondering. Some stuff Uncle B and Auntie Dal have said about the crops, and the general lack of rain in the area makes me wonder if Kilima is going through a drought right now. It would explain why a lot of their produce is kind of... not useable.

Aaaand Auni just dropped off a letter from Elouisa about the fish I caught. He conspiracy theories are kind of fun, but I'm not really sure how much I actually trust her. Still, if she could put stuff like her artifacts from human times into a museum, maybe more humans could figure out what they are.

Maybe, something could tell us what's going on and why we're all suddenly... here.

[fellpyrean]

I bring to you: some sillies from discord on a very silly topic.

Ahem.

AU where Arthur is Hastur's ex. Very vague NSFW mention. [Copy/pasted from discord]

Roughly set maybe a couple days after the beginning of canon, but massively off track from the moment Arthur opens his eyes and finds a very, very familiar voice in his head. He plays dumb, sort of. This isn't how Hastur would play things, if he'd managed to slip inside him.

So he plays dumb and tries to figure out what is going on and waves hand. This is half me laying things out, half Arthur yelling at John.

--

Arthur is hastur's ex

Is Arthur mortal? Wiggles hand. Not anymore. Nobody bothered to tell him fucking an elder god would do things to him. Suppose not many folks managed to get that far.

He thought it was a pretty normal relationship for a while! He was young and naive and had no idea his generous patron funding his arts was a *god*

By the time things got weird, well. He was pretty smitten himself. Young and stupid, he says with such scorn as to suggest he considers himself far past that age, though he looks maybe 30 at most.

Got sold on the magic of the place his patron said he could learn the most wonderful art and barely even flinched when he unveiled himself and took his eyes. To protect him, to better feel the music. Hell he considered it a pretty even trade!

And certainly, his art advanced by leaps and bounds with his new teacher. One on one, alone with his patron under a new name. Hastur. A strange name but his patron was so eager to hear it on his tongue. Spoken. Sung. Breathed out in whispers and cries more sacred than any prayer.

It took him longer than he'd care to admit for him to realize his... his lover was building a golden cage for him. Wrapping him up with luxury and adoration; unbelievably sappy for a thing like *him*. No wonder that wordy fucker thought it was so funny.

"But, well. I realized I was losing myself. I'd been caught up in the song so long, day in and out revolving around him, around us tangled together and creating such beautiful music, I didn't realize how long it'd been since I'd felt a fresh breeze. Gentle sunlight, fuck, even heard a bird. Picked my own meals or dressed myself. I'd become his pet and not even noticed."

"So when ah. When Kayne I believe he called himself said he'd not mind getting me home; said it'd be *funny* in this way that felt like he was having a lark at my expense, though I wasn't sure how except maybe my own stupidity, well. I said yes."

"Didn't take a single thing Hastur had given me. Except the clothes. Didn't have much choice in that. Left them behind first place I could and. Would you believe how nice it felt, to feel such terrible fabric on my skin? To hear a city! With. With people and cars! I almost cried with delight when some asshole told me to fuck off. Hadn't been treated like that in years and it was the most refreshing thing!"

"It's not an easy thing to hide from one of them. Not alone. But any time I stumbled into one of their strongholds, they always heard my story and howled. Miserable, horrid sounds, but gleeful in their revelry."

"The goat especially liked it. She let me stay quite a while actually! We talked. Told me she let me stay because I told her the funniest story she'd ever heard. That she'd heard Hastur was having a snit, but that it was over a human? A human, a mortal - she'd bleated at that, her way of laughing, so I suppose I was hardly mortal by then - had walked out on an elder god? Oh she would never forget this."

"They're all a bunch of gossips, you know. Unknowable majesty but nosy beyond belief for anything to get the tongues wagging. Like grannies on their porches."

"So she helped me. I have no idea what her followers thought, but she set me up in a quiet spot in the city, said it'd be easier with me being blind and me politely turning down her offer for new eyes - and I began my new life."

"You think you're the first *thing* to roll up on my doorstep? Hardly. You think I don't still recognize *his* voice after all these years? So whatever you - whatever *he* has planned, you can forget it. He's already had all he's going to get of me."

[ilonga]

the disaster lineage (TM) as piano players

bc I said so and bc I was thinking about how much learning to play piano might have helped anakin a lot with learning patience/discipline/wisdom/better understanding jedi teachings and philosophy? also it’s a great outlet for creativity & for when you’re feeling frustrated/sad--playing the piano can be so soothing & therapeutic. becoming a pianist could probably really help him become a more balanced, stable person overall, and music in general is just really great and makes your life better. + consider: anakin playing the piano for padme when he wants to impress her and anakin teaching the 501st some tunes on their leave time

it just has so much fix it potential, okay?? plus I like projecting 

anyways, the disaster lineage/trio as piano players, here we go:

obi-wan:

- classical music all the way

- he’s a classical/baroque era type of guy: mozart, bach, haydn, beethoven, all that jazz. really likes all the mozart sonatas, tends to prefer the 1st movements but he’ll do the 3rd if he’s feeling adventurous. taught anakin to see the beauty in the 2nd movements instead of defaulting them to “boring”

- cannot for the life of him understand what ahsoka sees in the contemporary era of piano music

- tends to prefer music in major keys, for some weird reason 

- sonatas sonatas SONATAS

- also waltzes. he plays a mean waltz. 

- and the well tempered clavier (bach) because it’s important, Anakin

- anakin finds most of his pieces “boring” but he played the moonlight sonata once and anakin was like BAM. instantly in love with that piece. never made fun of obi-wan’s musical preferences again for fear of obi-wan not teaching it to him someday

- when he’s feeling adventurous or melancholy he heads over to the romantic era. maybe some chopin

- learns by reading the music, learns all the notes & rhythms very precisely and accurately the first time through

- this makes his learning a piece take a long time because he wants to make sure he’s doing everything right

- also takes a long-ish time to memorize a piece for the same reasons

- uses metronomes. often

- practices his exercises & scales like he’s supposed to, unlike the rest of the trio

-  used to suffer a lot from stage fright/nerves/anxiety, but worked past it throughout the years

- his sightreading is always very careful and precise, he looks meticulously through the music beforehand

anakin:

- probably started out wanting to play pieces that are fast & angry because Master, they sound so cool!! 

- really wanted to learn kabalevsky’s sontina no. 1 opus 13 3rd movement at one point 

- also beethoven 

- but as time went on, he appreciated melodic, pretty pieces more and more, until eventually his preference shifted to those almost entirely

- this was kicked off by the piece “To a Wild Rose”

- at first he was kind of afraid to really embrace that because he was worried he’d get made fun of but eventually he just stopped caring and flaunted it 

- romantic era of piano music all the way 100%--chopin, tchaikovsky, also schubert and liszt to an extent

- schubert’s impromptu no. 3 op. 90, especially when he’s feeling kinda sad or is just in that vibe

- although he also does vibe a bit with early contemporary to an extent: debussy, debussy, debussy (the preludes, at least)

- vibes so much with debussy you have no idea

- Les Collines D’Anacapri (debussy): the whole package, fast and melodic

- moonlight sonata movements 1 & 3

- he’s partial to the first movement but ahsoka’s more partial to the third, so they’re always bickering over that

- minor keys minor keys MINOR KEYS

- June by Tchaikovsky!! what a jam. one of his all time favorites. plays it whenever he’s feeling down or just in the vibe. it took him forever to learn the middle part though because he just wanted to go fast already, but there are so many sharps and flats that he kept forgetting

- also vibes a lot with chopin nocturnes. and chopin waltzes.

- obi-wan gets tired of him playing so many melancholy pieces. anakin retorts that happy pieces are the most boring of piano pieces. they bicker

- also loves the Lark by glinka & balakirev. with all of his heart. it’s one of the first pieces he played for padme (she had a piano at varykino and they might have been on the run so he can try and get a little practice in, yknow?) and she was like. BAM. instantly in love. jkjkjk but she loved it. she gets very sappy in general when Anakin plays the piano

- also plays La Fille aux Cheveux de Lin for her. he plays padme lots of pretty pieces in general. she made sure to buy a piano for her senatorial apartments for this very reason. 

- debussy’s arabesque no. 1

- actually once he and padme reunited he just went looking through all his repertoire to try and find the prettiest pieces he could, to learn/relearn, so he could play them all for her

- played the Turkish March for the 501st once when they were on leave. once the 501st found out their general was a musician they went wild 

- has perfect pitch, which annoys both obi-wan and ahsoka to no end

- tends to rely on his ear a lot for learning pieces, which can help him learn & memorize quickly but also causes problems down the road, because he tends to not look through the music carefully enough and ends up with a lot of wrong notes/rhythms

- so, especially early on, he has to do a lot of “unlearning” a piece to get it right, and he got frustrated a lot in those first few years

- he eventually got past it, but he still rushes through trying to learn a piece quickly from time to time

- also tends to have problems with sightreading for the same reason--he doesn’t look through the music carefully enough

- keeping a steady tempo was also a challenge for him at first

- can reach over an octave with ease

- tends to be super musical & expressive but sometimes when he’s still learning the piece he tends to unduly accent notes that shouldn’t be accented

- tries to practice whenever they’re on leave or have free time during the war, plays a lot for ahsoka, obi-wan, padme, & the 501st

- has taught some of the 501st some basic tunes

- taught ahsoka

- for some reason, he’s really never felt like playing any music for palpatine. he can’t really put his finger on why.

(note that a bunch of these are from the discord brainstorming session)

ahsoka:

- starts out wanting to learn pop covers & stuff but does find the fast & angry pieces extremely cool

- never really transitions to liking romantic era melodic, slower pieces

- actually vibes with the contemporary era of piano music, for some weird reason 

- BUT. she does vibe with debussy’s “voiles” bc of the “forbeoding vibes”. it’s one of the few slowish pieces she actually likes playing

- that and tchaikovsky’s june. but everyone vibes with tchaikovsky’s june

- loves copland’s the Cat and the Mouse. it took her forever and ever to learn though, and she’s still not able to play it as fast as she wants to (she wants to play it really fast)

- does vibe with bach to an extent

- teaches fives video game music

- has a good ear but is somewhere in between obi-wan and anakin in terms of learning new pieces; she does rely on her ear, to an extent, but she looks through the music much more carefully than anakin and tends to learn it accurately the first time through

- enjoys music theory, unlike anakin, which makes obi-wan extremely proud

- can also reach further than an octave. can reach an octave with relative ease, a nine note interval with a little effort, and a ten note interval if she really pushes it

- can also memorize a piece decently quickly, although she has to go back through and make sure she’s memorizing it accurately and not getting notes/rhythms wrong

- does not vibe with most of debussy’s preludes, or most mozart sonatas 

- does, however, vibe with the odd beethoven sonata here and there

- and ofc the moonlight sonata. everyone vibes with the moonlight sonata

- can and will play all of the video game music

- has tried to impress barriss with a fast piece more than once. barriss is suitably impressed, although she found the Cat and the Mouse rather. . . much

- doesn’t really get stage fright, unlike both obi-wan and anakin, because she’s always taken a rather “chill” approach to learning & performing 

- padme asked her discreetly once to teach her a simple piece so that she could surprise anakin, so ahsoka taught her how to play a simple variation of “ode to joy”. anakin loved it

+ bonus: padme

- never had the time to learn an instrument, between being literal queen of a planet at 14 and then a Senator after that, but she’s always had a soft spot for harp, so it’s on her bucket list to learn someday

- however, she adores music, especially classical music, and really has a soft spot for the slow, pretty pieces 

- loves tchaikovsky

- she finds it soothing and it really helps her relax after a long day trying to keep the Republic from falling apart :’)

- always asks anakin to play her a piece whenever they have an evening together

- has also gotten ahsoka to play her pieces, and, as mentioned above, teach her a simple tune

- has tried to wheedle obi-wan into playing her a piece. eventually it worked. she’s probably one of few non-Jedi he’s actually played the piano for

.

anyways disaster trio as piano players you’re welcome :’)

[suchakidder]

 Uh, I meant to work on the last chapter of This is the Forest Primeval, but instead I worked on 1500 k words of Martin wanting kids?

This was supposed to be the opening of a time travel fic where only Martin goes to the past and interacts with bb!Jon, and it still might be, but for now it’s on it’s own. Set post 181. Read here or below

Martin wants something. It’s not a problem.

    Not long ago, it would have been. Shame and self-doubt were never far from desire, though sometimes they would trail behind at just the right distance that Martin would want something—  a new job, a day off, a harmless crush on his unavailable boss—  and think maybe, just maybe, he could want something and it would be ok, but then that distance would close up. Did he really need that pint of ice cream? Was it really necessary to call the landlord over the mold in the kitchen? Couldn’t he just be happy that he had a flat at all? Why was he always so greedy for more?

    At first, those had been in his mother’s derisive tone, but he repeated them to himself so often that over time, they lost the shape of her accent and intonation. It took even more time for a new voice to form, or perhaps it had been there ever since his mother had gone away and it took Martin far too long to realize, but that the inner voice repeating those same words was his own. 

    As an adult, he didn’t expect that voice to ever change but almost as soon as Martin accepted Peter Lukas’s protection, it was his voice, always so unflappable and even, that Martin heard in his own head. The thought he’d give credence to anything Peter said was laughable, truly laughable. In fact, the first time post-Lonely that doubt had crept into Martin’s mind he’d had to laugh out loud with such a sudden ferocity it shocked Jon. It has been too hard to explain through the great, shuddering laughs that made way to sobs after some time, but Martin had been able to eventually assure Jon he was quite alright. He never thought he’d be thankful for anything Peter Lukas had done, but Martin will take the win as it was.

    So he wants something. It’s not a problem. 

    The problem is, Martin doesn’t know what he wants. 

    Ever since Upton House, there’s been this desire humming through him, ever-present in his nerves and his mind, but completely eluding his attempts to see or grasp it. No matter how hard he tries to unravel it, it stays firmly hidden, though it steers Martin’s actions. It has something to do with Jon, Martin can tell that much, and even after days of spending nothing but basking in each other’s company at the house, all he wants to do is spend every moment memorizing the lines on Jon’s face or watching him the muscles in his arm shift as he gestures wildly while talking about something he finds interesting and other such sappy nonsense.

    Currently, they are in a small cave in a wooded area outside of a small village. The forest looks positively wicked, like “Snow White being torn at by the trees” wicked, but Jon’s assured Martin, in his best “I’m the authority on spookiness” voice that it’s a safer choice  than the seemingly fine looking village past the tree line. The cave is more accurately a little den under an outcropping of rock, no deeper than a meter, the barest bit of shelter from the outside. 

    There’s a bundle of twigs, bark, and tinder Jon collected and he is lighting them with the flint Martin had only really packed on a lark. He’d known nothing of wilderness survival aside from what he’d seen in shows and movies, but he could hardly conceive of walking to London without the basics. He didn’t really think they’d be put to use, but there Jon is, scraping the flint along the steel. 

    Martin watches his hands, his thin, long fingers, the waxy scar tissue on his left hand, as he works. Jon isn’t very strong, but he’s nimble and capable and Martin is awash with emotion and attraction. He had never known capability was his type, but he hadn’t known much of the particularities of his attractions until Jon. He hadn’t known much about himself at all until Jon.

    “I want you to remember me.” Martin says. It’s not quite right, but it’s almost there. Martin feels like he’s finally tugging the right thread, like he might finally find the end if he keeps traveling along. 

    “I—  Of course, I will.” Jon sets down the flint next to the unlit fire bundle and moves over to where Martin is sitting. From the distant and harsh man Martin had first known Jon as, he never would have expected how tactile he is now. There’s a language all it’s own to his touches, and right now he folds both his hands over Martin’s and grips on to him, not tightly, but firmly.  “It was only the camera lens at— “

    “I know. It’s not that. It’s, it’s… I want you to remember me, but not just you. Or maybe you and maybe it’s remembered that isn’t right. I want…”

    Martin could just ask Jon to ask, it would be easier that way, but Martin knows he’s so close.  “When I used to think about dying, I was always… All my descendants, generation after generation, they were born and they toiled and they died, and they all did it so it could one day get to me, and when I thought about it, it just seemed like some big mistake or cosmic joke.”

    “And now?” Jon asks carefully.

    “I don’t… I want to be remembered for being here. Not here as in part of the apocalypse, but… I lived and loved. My personhood wasn’t a waste of space.”

    Jon doesn’t have to tell Martin that was never true; they both know that. It only took the apocalypse to become a person, but Martin’s not sorry for it.

    “I think, I think that’s why people have kids. I thought of my ancestors and thought it was biology or society, or I don’t know, that selfish need to pass on your progeny. But I think when you love someone, I mean, really truly love someone, you’ve found something so rare and so precious that you know you can make something bigger than yourselves together. You don’t just want to make something more than yourself or think you can, you Know you can.” 

Jon’s pulled his hands away to let Martin think but Martin snatches them back, needing more than words to try to portray this truth. He holds onto Jon as hard as he can. 

    “I want kids,” Martin says without any shame or doubt.

    “Martin,” There’s a long pause. “I don’t think I need to tell you that adoption agencies aren’t exactly operational right now.”

    Martin looks at Jon but he doesn’t need the Eye to tell him that Jon is doubtful, or to tell him why. It hurts, deep down where Martin keeps all the sorrow over just how lonely Jon’s life has been, how the little love he received in his life is highly disparate without how much he deserved. 

    “You would be a good dad Jon.”

    Jon just looks at him skeptically.

    “You would! You would read to them, every night, and you’d do the voices and then you’d explain the moral or the symbolism. You’d be involved in… in whatever they were into, theater or… bugs, or, god help us, sports. You would learn everything you could.”   

    “Well, I don’t think I’d have much of a choice about it,” Jon says with a tight lipped grimace.

    “But you’d want to. That’s--that’s all that matters. It doesn’t matter whether you have an encyclopedia in your head, we both know you aren’t Knowing it all the time. You would consciously know everything you could.”

    Jon doesn’t quite agree, but he doesn’t protest and Martin lets him go, barely an arm’s reach away, to finish lighting the fire and they don’t talk about it the rest of the night. 

    Martin doesn’t let himself imagine the what-ifs and could-have-beens, not now in this world. There’s nothing to gain from that. But he lets himself now, imaging Jon awkwardly holding a baby, or sat with a school aged child at the kitchen table, their kitchen table, heads bent over homework. Jon would help them, calmly explaining whatever concept they were stuck on, patient no matter how many different approaches it has to take.

Martin wants it so badly he feels sick with it, all this desire and want and somewhere in it, the faintest sliver of hope. He wants something he can’t have and it’s not a problem, but it does have the making of a tragedy if Martin lets it. 

So he doesn’t.

When they lay down, Martin to try to force his body into a few hours of sleep and Jon to achieve whatever form of rest he can, Martin curls up behind Jon, his front pressed up tight against Jon’s, one leg slipped between his. Their entwined hands rest over Jon’s chest where there’s the barest flicker of a heartbeat, irregular, faint, but there. 

In the quiet stillness they’ve created of this fear destroyed world, Martin whispers it all to Jon, the dreams and what-ifs, everything he wants for them. Of everything Jonah Magnus has robbed them of, Martin refuses to let this be one.

[handsigned]

"someone told me about this thing. from before. called mother's day." lark clumsily signs to rook, before pulling something out from behind her back. it's a large fur -- cleaned and tanned, perfect for wearing or for keeping warm on the cold winter nights. "i made this. killed it and skinned it. for you." lark explains, shifting on her feet, before adding one last set of signs. "i love you, mom."

ROOK DOESN’T CONSIDER HERSELF A CLUMSY PERSON, but when lark approaches her with a gift in her hands, rook drops her fork in surprise and watches it clatter onto the table, imagining the ringing sound that it must make on impact. for a few seconds, all she can do is stare at the young woman who’s become her daughter, unsure what she’s supposed to do in this situation. the last time she’d received a gift…god, rook can hardly remember, other than the mask joseph had presented her with all those years ago. 

feeling as if she’s stared at lark for much too long ( the last thing she wants is for the young woman to think that she doesn’t appreciate her, not when that couldn’t be farther from the truth ! ), she pushes back her chair and stands. her mouth opens, the closes – she imagines she’s gaping like a fish right now – before she takes two steps forward and engulfs lark in a tight bear hug. 

i love you, she whispers, not quite sure if the words are being spoken verbally or not but lips moving all the same. i love you. 

after a few minutes, she pulls back. her eyes glitter with tears, and she uses the back of her hand to wipe them dry ( but oh, how they keep coming all the same ! ). “ thank you, “ she says, hands shaking. she hadn’t even been aware of the date today; after all that had happened, she hasn’t even bothered to check in with her own mother, not wanting to face her after all rook’s been through these past couple years. the last thing she’d expected would be for lark to bring it up, let alone do something for it. 

rook’s never thought she’d have a family of her own. she’s a soldier at heart, someone who’s always fighting – a person like her doesn’t deserve to settle down, CAN’T settle down. to be blessed with a beautiful partner ( joey hudson deserves more than rook will ever be able to give her ) as well as a daughter of her own…it means more to her than words can say or hands can sign. 

for someone who’s thought so long that god had cursed her, she doesn’t ever remember being HAPPIER. 

“ i love you too, l-a-r-k, “ she says, a watery smile on her face. “ i’m so LUCKY to have you as a daughter. you mean the world to me and i. . . “ she’s not one to get sappy, but this seems like an appropriate time for it. reaching out to cup her daughter’s ( her daughter !! ) face in her hands, she presses a kiss to lark’s forehead, smoothing away any errant hairs flying out of lark’s neatly braided hair. “ i love you. “ 

@feralseed

[alchemine]

You fave WW ship for the ship for the ship asks

I’ll do Hecate/Dimity aka Starbroom for this one. 

who wakes up first in the morning - Dimity gets up when it’s still dark outside and runs a 10k before breakfast. Hecate thinks she’s insane. 

who’s the first to fall asleep at night - Hmm, probably Dimity, because when you’ve woken up with the larks and exerted yourself all day long, you’re tired early. Also I think Hecate likes staying up late and tinkering with potions when the rest of the school is sleeping. 

what they playfully tease each other over - Dimity teases Hecate about anything and everything. Hecate isn’t the best at playful teasing (it tends to come out sounding meaner than she intends it to) and she usually doesn’t even make the attempt, but she’s been known to drop a ‘Star of the Sky’ comment here and there. 

what they do when the other’s having a bad day - Dimity will assess the situation and decide on one of three courses of action: leave her on her own to stew until she feels better, give her a pep talk like this one, or on rare occasions if she thinks it’s wanted, give her a hug. Hecate is impatient with trivialities but can be surprisingly supportive when things are really going wrong, and she’s delivered some very affectionate pep talks of her own. 

how they say ‘i’m sorry’ after arguments - Both of them are more the type to show they’re sorry than to actually say it, although they have different ways of doing so. 

which one’s more ticklish - Hecate is. Dimity found out by accident and  she’s never dared to use the knowledge again, although sometimes when Hecate is being difficult, she dreams of just giving her a good dig in the ribs to give her something else to think about. 

their favourite rainy day activities - Hecate’s no. 1 fave is always making potions, and Dimity is a pretty competent potion-maker herself, so sometimes she’ll come into the lab and help. Hecate also has a spot someplace high up in the castle (a disused storage room or something like that) where she likes to go for a moment’s peace and quiet during the day, or late at night after she’s finished her experiments; it has a window seat with a cushion, and they’ll sit there together to watch the rain fall. 

how they surprise each other - I don’t think Hecate likes surprises at all when they’re directed at her, and Dimity knows that, so she’ll tell her in advance if she has something special planned. Hecate is someone who gives gifts rarely, but when she does, she puts lots and lots of thought into choosing just the perfect thing for the recipient, so she’ll start planning Dimity’s Christmas present in June and it’ll be amazing. 

their most sappy shows of public affection - They can’t go overboard with public affection when the girls are around because they’re supposed to be on duty, but they’ll sneak in a hand squeeze or an arm pat, or a hug if there’s been a disaster (as there so often is). 

give me a pairing and i’ll answer these questions

[killerkyara]

Substitute

Kyara couldn’t help but feel bad for the girl...But it was conflicting. One side of her wanted to be as cold as Lark was to her, crueler, even--she was a murderer, clearly deranged. She’d hurt Osprey...Kyara couldn’t imagine it. If someone had taken Cherry from her? Yet the other side spoke compelling reason...Sympathy. The rogue had good intuition that the nameless Shade, as she’d called herself, had been used all her life. Perhaps this was all she knew how to do; all she had ever been taught. Had she ever been shown kindness? Love? Guidance? Ky wanted to help her, but she couldn’t shake the feeling that it was wrong...And worse, she couldn’t shake the feeling that Cherry would know what to do here...How to get through to the damaged woman, and she didn’t. 

Her foggy mind drifted off to other topics, her jaw clenching tight when she thought of Alastar. She didn’t know what had stopped her from clocking him in the jaw when she had the chance...It had taken all her self control to merely shove him back from their tent and not go in for more as he threatened to jeopardize their mission, found amusement in something so serious, sat around while they did the work--...She shook her head. There was no reason in making herself angry again, not when he had already stormed off to enjoy his temper tantrum. Part of her wished he wouldn’t come back. The other chastised herself for thinking such things. Conflicting indeed. 

Lark successfully brought her mind back to the present as she passed over the pipe from where the pair of them rested in the bedroll...Turning the wood over between her fingers, she looked it over a few times before taking in a long drag. She thought Lark was reaching for the pipe back, but the druid found her hand instead, making the rogue quirk a brow her way questioningly. She let the smoke easily roll out from her lips as Lark gently peeled off her glove after getting a peek at the ink beneath, inspecting each tattoo with narrowed eyes. Ky supposed the smoked mixture made her a bit bolder, and they’d already practically filled the tent with it. 

Kyara gave the pipe back and took off the other glove, making Lark giggle as she set the skull tattoo in place upon her face so it would fit accordingly. “What do those mean? The tattoos.”

“Well.” Ky started softly, pushing her lips out in thought. “I got them for three reasons. First, to cover these...” She pointed out the vivid scarring along her inked knuckles, from being split a few times too many. True enough, they were hard to spot, but it was apparent that without the tattoos they would be eyecatching.

Lark spoke up almost immediately. “I could probably get rid of those.” But Ky simply shook her head. “I’ve lived with them long enough...I suppose it’s grown on me. The second, I just like how they look. How they make me feel. And the third, because they are a reminder to me.”

Kyara then pointed out the tattoo of twin cherries on her knuckle. It took Lark a moment to get it, but when she did, she smiled. “They remind that I can be good.” She flexed the fingers of the skull hand. “But also, that I can still do what I need to do. And the rest hold smaller meanings.”

Ky spent some time showing the tattoos she could and telling Lark how they reminded her of things from home...The architecture, plant life, evident by the patterns and floral designs that zigzagged down her tan biceps and forearms. The tattoo beneath her bust of the sun, moon and clouds made Lark blush to look at, more at the meaning than the fact that the rogue exposed the toned plane of her stomach in the process. It was a mural to honor her and Cherry, total opposites, but partners still. Would someone ever do something to so blatantly show their love for her, she couldn’t help but wonder? And with that, she sunk down to rest against Kyara’s chest, making her blink as she wrapped an arm around her side and squeezed almost desperately, seeking comfort in her warmth.

[ REFERENCES ]

Drifting off in the sensation of the haze brought by the herbs and her own tiredness, it took Lark a few long moments to realize that she had been somewhat feeling her comrade up. She instantly went red and drew inward, grinning sheepishly. “Sorry, Ky...You just felt...I...” 

Her hand stilled upon her arm, and Kyara suddenly understood what she meant. Like Osprey? Or at least, what she imagined her to feel like...It was no surprise that the two of them had similar physiques in their field, toned and well trained. The rogue took a moment to think of how to reply before she reached down to idly twirl a lock of hair around her finger,  letting it fall back soon after. “It’s...Ok. You remind me of her too, you know. Not Osprey. Cherry.”  

Lark blinked in surprise, and Kyara carried on cautiously. “Somewhat how you look, but mostly how you act. You have her kindness, but like her, you don’t let people walk over you.”

Kyara wondered if their similarities, being there when the two didn’t have anyone else, being just enough...Had that brought them together as friends in the first place? But Lark propped herself up upon an elbow and soon stole her attention.

“But it’s different...You...You have Cherry, and I--”

“Lark.” Kyara quickly shushed her, shaking her head with a smile. “Don’t tell anyone I said anything this sappy, alright? But I think that if things are meant to be, they’ll get there. It may take time, and I have no way of telling how long, just that it will happen. And until then, if I’m a convincing substitute, I’ll be happy to be so.” Her tone was teasing with the last bit, but still genuine, making Lark flash a gracious yet bashful smile her way.

She leaned back against her and heaved out a relaxed sigh, letting the sound of Ky’s heartbeat lull her to rest again, but not before softly murmuring. 

 “Thank you.”

[ @blackbay-wra ] mentions: @juniper-rose-blower, @patiencekindnesscourage, @alastar-wyatt, @justinegrotius

[deltaengineering]

spring anime 2017 part 2: girlfriendship is magic

I can’t believe Maidragon was so powerful it brought the entire 90s back.

See also:

• spring anime 2017 part 1: woke up late

• spring anime 2017 part 3: comfy and easy to wear

• spring anime 2017 bonus round: things you already knew were good

Clockwork Planet

Yes, forecasts this season predict heavy showers of magical girlfriends.This time the dude afflicted by this sudden precipitation is a clockwork nerd, who gets a clockwork gothloli dropped on him. This may be less of a coincidence than it sounds because for spurious reasons the entire planet has been replaced by clockwork – if you thought this show was mentally capable of having a metaphorical title, I have bad news. So basically this is teen schmuck + robot superweapon having fights in a city that looks like a lazy steampunk cosplayer’s top hat, in between erotic misunderstandings. I’m regretting that I called Macchiavellism’s fights bad because a couple good action cuts are already a lot to ask for, as evidenced here: It looks just terrible, and obviously the content itself is even worse. Nuh-uh.

Eromanga-sensei

I love Hiro Kanzaki’s character designs. There, I said it. I just wish they weren’t attached to bullshit like OreImo or Eromanga-sensei, which, being by the same author and all, is more or less the same thing. It’s pretty bad when the implied incest fantasy is the least revolting thing about your celebration of otaku shittery: So a schlubby light novel protagonist who also writes light novels (and who happens to be surrounded by hot bitches that just love people who write light novels because that’s so cool) finds out that the mysterious porn artist he’s collaborating with over the internet is actually his hikkikomori little sister, who reacts to this revelation like any girl would: being tsundere. This means it’s full of mildly self-deprecating nerd humor, the infuriating kind that makes it abundantly clear that if the author meant any of it, he wouldn’t write this crap. Even worse is that the sibling relationship is played for sappy family feels, which I would be more willing to give the benefit of the doubt to if this wasn’t OreImo 2: The Sequel To OreImo. And the main guy can’t keep his eyes from wandering anyway, so it’s not like there’s a mystery here. I’ll say it looks real good, obviously there’s money in the OreImo market and it’s well made as a result, plus the aforementioned character designs. But if I want more Hiro Kanzaki I’d rather watch Go! Go! 575 again.

Hinako Note

There’s actually no Manga Time Kirara adaptation this season, but worry not, Hinako Note is indistinguishable from one of those (that one being GochiUsa). So it’s Kirara at it’s most basic too: 5 girls with mild, generic quirks hang out and cute things take place. You get your shy one, you get your hungry one, you get your tiny maid one, etc. Ostensibly this is theater-themed, but as of episode 1 it’s less about theater than K-ON is about music, and that’s saying something. Now, these shows are always extremely inoffensive by design, and if they do nothing fundamentally wrong they just come across as dull. Since this does nothing fundamentally wrong, it just comes across as dull. Congratulations, Hinako Note, you pulled it off even while being born in the wrong magazine.

Kabukibu!

The easy hook when writing about Kabukibu is that it’s another DEEN show about a classic Japanese performance artform, but it’s blindingly obvious right away that Kabukibu is no Rakugo Shinjuu – it being about a school club is right in the title after all, and it has the requisite spurious punctuation too, so everything else falls into place from there. The main innovation is that this is about cute guys doing cute kabuki. As always, our main dude has to gather the five members to bring the school club back to life first. So it’s unimaginative and honestly rather bad, but I still like it. For starters there’s the bit where our lead is such a nerd that he spends every conversation clearing up common misconceptions about kabuki, which is hilarious, since it resembles weeaboo Richard Stallman wanting to interject for a second over and over again. Secondly, the comical cast of misfits does seem to have potential, with a rock singer that can’t sing, an obvious woman that is actually a woman, and so on. Overall it reminds me of Cheer Danshi, an obvious C-list production that gets by by being earnest. If I can learn to not be annoyed at the yodelling kabuki inflection, I might actually watch this for a lark.

The King’s Avatar

This may be completely outside the “Japanese cartoon” purview of this post since it’s 100% Chinese and doesn’t even have a Japanese dub like the Haoliners productions, but it’s on MAL so it counts I suppose. Also, it’s rather... good? The King’s Avatar is about a legendary MMO pro gamer who gets kicked off his team and has to give up his account, which afflicts him with a multitude of sads. After a bit of soul-searching he starts playing the game again on a new server, starting from level 1. What makes this not as bad as it sounds is that it’s not an isekai bonanza, but a sports show where the sport happens to be visually interesting, and it’s a slow and contemplative sports show at that. The whole “starting from level 1" thing is a topical twist on the sports comeback story, and it looks fairly nice too, a few bits of unfortunate CG aside (but that’s common, so whatever). Yeah, I like this, and if fansubs turn out to not be a huge hassle to get hold of I’ll give it a try.

Love Kome - We Love Rice

Back in Japan, please enjoy this short comedy about rice crop gijinka, boyband edition. It has atrocious character designs and is painfully unfunny. So nothing new there.

Re:Creators

Girlfriends keep falling in my lap, and that might mean my eyes will soon be turning red. Hey, this is the old “reverse isekai”, where some nerd gets to live with a bunch of characters from his favorite anime that inexplicably became real. Brace for domestic hijinks and fish-out-of-water comedy - and a lot of action, because this is Ei Aoki working with offbrand Fate material. He may be this show’s saving grace, because I’m willing to forgive dumb action anime a lot if it at least manages to have some actual fucking action in it. The idea that these anime characters think they’re in the “realm of the gods” (i.e., their creators, you see) also has some storytelling potential, if it doesn’t get buried under stuff blowing up and comedic trips to the konbini. And it doesn’t have a “walking in on the girl naked” scene, which probably counts as “classy” in this field. I don’t know, it sure is stupid as hell but it might be a good time. We’ll see.

Renai Boukun

Renai Boukun is a comedy’s comedy about a very silly cupid that ships people, and herself. As a real anime comedy, it is of course chock full of people acting wacky followed by reaction faces, which is my kryptonite. I do have to admit that this show at least goes all out with it, it’s fast and furious and never lets up. Some of the jokes are even okay (mostly the more absurd ones like the unsettlingly bizarre cat with a human face), though most are just repetitive, like the yandere girl being constantly jealous. Yeah, this is just totally not my thing, but if I give it any amount of praise that probably means it’s a good one?

Seikaisuru Kado

Never say that bureaucrats don’t get no respect, because this is the second season in a row where we get an anime about pencilpushers being totally awesome. The main difference between this and ACCA is that ACCA was roughly 80% style, and Seikaisuru Kado has no style. It makes up for it with conviction, because this is a show where some desk jockey assigned to wind down an electroplating business spends a night googling, with the result being him developing a new electroplating procedure that saves the company and impresses physics professors – and that is the intro before the science fiction aspect comes into play. Oh yeah, there’s a science fiction aspect. So after a job well done, Super Bureaucrat Man is taking a flight from Haneda airport when a Borg cube unceremoniously drops on the plane. The rest of the episode is spent with scientists trying to figure out what happened, mostly by shooting tank shells at the cube and so on. Guess they just aren’t bureaucratic enough, because by the end our hero emerges from the cube, having apparently come to an agreement with the proprietor. Uh. Yes, this is an extreme amount of nonsense, and I have no idea where this is supposed to be going. With the amount of military hardware on display, it makes me think “GATE, but not for total assholes”, but who knows. It looks very weird too, it’s a CG show that cuts a lot of corners by using 2D animation (I know, right?). Usually CG characters are good when you have a lot of action because it enables a fluid camera, but this has no action and they still could have done their special effects in CG like everyone else. So it ends up as an anime where the important characters look worse than the unimportant ones they couldn’t be bothered to build a CG model for. The whole thing is bizarre enough to be intriguing, but I don’t have high hopes for it, especially since the slots for shows I actually want to watch are now filling up.

Tsuki ga Kirei

Case in point: Tsuki ga Kirei is a romance about a bookish nerd dude who loves to quote Dazai at his most morose, and a neurotic girl. Needless to say, it is very awkward, but also kind of cute. This may seem like a slim synopsis, but that’s pretty much it: Tsuki ga Kirei is the sort of show that has the potential to be great if it pays off, but just becomes boring to infuriating Mari Okada clone #3879435 if it doesn’t. So it’s a risky proposition, and not one you can call based on the first episode. On the execution level it seems to do it right so far, it’s well directed, sticks to its slow, sensitive tone and looks pleasant and detailed – the only distracting thing are regrettable and robotic CG background characters all over the place. Overall, this is a show that demands at least three episodes, which it will get from me. Ask again later.

Twin Angel BREAK

Finally, if you’re looking for some basic-ass mahou shoujo shit, here’s the new Twin Angel spinoff. It’s indeed some basic-ass mahou shoujo shit (two-girl team aka PreCure version). The genki red one and the reserved blue one go around fighting evil by the moonlight or whatever, while being cheered on by their one-gimmick-each friends. I somehow doubt this thing is setting itself up for a subversion of any kind, so yeah. What you see is what you get. The only memorable thing is that the action is more than merely bad here, it’s comically bad. Seriously, it’s somewhere between Astro Fighter Sunred and Ninja Slayer. Too bad the rest of the show is just unambitiously competent, so watching it for production pratfalls seems like it’s not worth it either.

[bbcphile]

5,8,9,20,36,51,54,66,74,77,84,92,97,99 :D

For the ask meme (http://bbcphile.tumblr.com/post/156599506166/these-are-actually-hella-fucking-cute-yall): wow, I’m honored you want to know so much aboutme! Ok, buckle up, because here we go:  

5: Are you self-conscious of your smile?

Normally,I quite like my smile. I only get self-conscious about it in photographs, becauseI can tell the difference between my “I’m actually happy” smile and my camera smile,and I often foolishly assume they look totally different to everyone else. (Spoiler: they don’t.)

8: What artistic medium do you use to express your feelings?

Usuallymusic (both via recordings and by making it myself). If I’m really happy, therewill be dancing involved.

9: Do you like singing/humming to yourself?

Iguess, in that I do it all the time. :D

20: What's your favorite eye color?

I’mnot sure I have one. Hazel? Blue?

36: Which band's sound would fit your mood right now?

Heh.Magnetic Fields. (It’s a bad day.)

51: Think of a person. What song do you associate with them?

Oh,wow. Any person? Am I also supposed to say which person? And there are so manyoptions to go with: sad, sappy, happy, exceedingly personal. I’m going to dosomething in between:

 @fionatlux with “Ordinary Day” by Great Big Sea, becausethe very last thing that happened before I got into my mom’s car and went homeafter graduating from college was that I went to say goodbye to her and amutual friend, and they played that song and sang along. It will forever beassociated with an amazing feeling of love, friendship, community, resilience,and moving on to the next stage even if you’re scared. 

54: Who's the last person you saw with a true look of sadness ontheir face?

I’vejust learned that I’m surprisingly uneasy about outing other people’s emotionalstates, so I’ll just skip this one. 

66: What would your ideal flower crown look like?

Idon’t know if I have one, but I’m going to wear thisfor an event I have to attend in costume, so we’ll go with that.

74: Describe a good friend of yours without using their name orgendered pronouns.

Isthis supposed to be a physical description thing, or a personality descriptionthing?  I’ll assume the latter, becausethat’s more interesting:

Anamazing, loyal, loving person who knows me better than almost anyone in theworld apart from @sufficientlylargen, a brilliant professor, smart as hell, excellentwriter of both creative and academic prose, best shopping buddy ever, funny,excellent taste in movies, the reason I know about fanfic (and started writingfanfic), gets me to laugh at myself and my ridiculousness, can stop my negativeself-talk in its tracks with a raise of an eyebrow, beautiful, trustworthy,reliable, incredibly resilient, an amazing parent raising the best kid ever, andthe best friend anyone could ever ask for. :D (I’d tag you, but I’m pretty sure that would defeat the purpose!)

77: Pink or yellow lemonade?

Yuck.Neither. I hate citrus.

84: Are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones?

Nope!I’ve toyed with the idea of getting a musical note tattooed on my foot (becausea friend did it and it looks awesome) but I don’t actually want to.

92: Are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a personwho barely sprinkles a pinch?

I’msolidly in the middle. 

97: Myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house?

ENFJ,Cancer, Hufflepuff (followed closely by Ravenclaw)

99: List some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hearthem.

It really depends on my mood, but here are some favorites,in the bittersweet/mildly angsty category:

Vienna Teng, “Gravity”

Edward Elgar, “Nimrod” (from the Enigma Variations)

“Hurricane,” from Hamilton

Ralph Vaughan Williams, “The Lark Ascending”

Patrick Wolf, “Teignmouth”

Sigur Rós, “Dauðalogn”

Kate Bush, “Moments of Pleasure”

Dave Matthews Band, “Pig”

The Decemberists, “The Crane Wife 3”

The Cranberries, “Dreams”

David Housden, “Escape” (from Thomas Was Alone)