#l'aiha i got to develop all the way from the beginning but atlas is just HERE

[thefinalwitness]

15 + 20 for atlas :3c

THANK U KIMMMMM FOR MY LIFE

15. What places hold significant meaning or memories for your OC? Do they have a positive or negative association with those places?

in a way, atlas considers all of etheirys sentimental and precious! it was the home of her original creator and best friend, and even though she's gone and the world is so different, atlas knows venat loved it then and would love it now. she was a force of change in a world that wanted to stagnate, movement where all else paused.

upon finding out they can traverse the reflections of the source though, and finding out an intact ruin of an ancient academy still exists, atlas does hold a special place in their heart for it. it's the only true fossil of what was, what they left so suddenly on their mission to save meteion. they didn't even think much of the school originally, but now that it's all that's left as it was 12k years ago, it's unfathomably precious to them.

they also, in a weird sort of way, feel sentimental about ultima thule. it was at the edge of the universe, more than lifetimes from etheirys, yet they spent 12k years there, and all 12k were in the effort of saving a friend they hadn't had for more than 48 hours previously. the place was lonely, hopeless and frankly it's the stuff of atlas's nightmares.

but it was also the destination of their last instruction from venat; the stage where her last wish to atlas would play out. and, for better or worse, it was their and meteion's home, and it was where meteion finally came back to them. they are permanently, intrinsically tied to ultima thule, and it'd be hard for them to feel only negatively or only positively for such a complicated place.

20. Has your OC ever done something terrible and lied about it? Did they run away or blame someone else for it? How long did they maintain the lie and did the truth ever come out?

post-ultima thule, i think they initially didn't LIKE minfilia very much? and minfilia didn't really like them either. but atlas sort of blamed her for venat's demise, even though minfilia was such a teeny, inconsequential part of it—like, whether or not minfilia had asked to return to life, venat was going to be no more that day. what she gave to save minfilia wouldn't have been enough to save herself.

but atlas struggles with that for a while, looking for a cause, a reason; it's easier to face loss when you believe there was anything you could have done differently, that there WAS a chance, that you DID have a say in the matter. but the reality is atlas didn't. venat was going to die that day no matter what they could've or couldn't've done. minfilia asking for life had no impact on that outcome whatsoever.

atlas, more than anything, lied to themself about it. that they didn't hate minfilia, not for that reason anyway, that they just didn't like her, even though they couldn't name one single other thing about her that made them angry. over the six months between 6.0 and 6.1, i think atlas is able to move through more of their grief and accept minfilia as herself, not as some kind of catalyst through which venat died. they're able to bond over their shared mourning. they both would've done anything to save venat, and they both have to accept that there was never anything they could've done.

they did admit they used to hate minfilia, and minfilia isn't surprised they felt that way. likewise, minfilia didn't like THEM much—venat often mourned their loss, even though she had ordered it, and minfilia found herself wondering, "how could you never come back?" even though she knew the answer was that meteion's song of oblivion would destroy everything, even though minfilia once had to make the very same choice herself, and had chosen the same as atlas. minfilia and atlas each felt as if the other had wronged venat, but really just saw a lot of themselves IN each other in how they'd "failed" venat, even though they'd done everything she asked, even though in her eyes they had beyond succeeded. minfilia and atlas never run away from each other, but they do have a wall between them that takes a long time to break down before they can admit to the truth of it all.

atlas isn't designed nor inclined to act outwardly cruel—as a creation of venat, they were designed to be a guiding star for the lost, in whatever way that person was lost (physically, mentally, etc). but on the topic of lying, they will lie if the truth brings little to no purpose or solace to someone else, and they will do so with ease. it's their purpose to help others find their way, not hinder them, and so long as the truth doesn't hold a crucial piece of the puzzle, they'll lie about it for the sake of the objective: helping that person find their way.

they don't always FEEL good about it though. even as a creation, a "concept" that was not born and does not necessarily hold a personality or "soul" the way a man does, they recognize that there is something to mourn in depriving another of the truth. that even if without the truth they are happier, even able to find hope they otherwise couldn't have, atlas recognizes that the sadness or anger remains, sitting between them and the recipient, never to be grasped, yet always touching both of them.

i think the one and only lie atlas has ever told, and it was to themself, that they'd never be able to face is that, every so often in ultima thule, they'd wished they had the power to kill meteion. that they hated her. that they wanted to go home. that meteion's belief that all hope dies, that all life is meaningless and death is the only answer, was further proven in atlas's weakest moments, when they almost wanted to give up, when the fight didn't feel worth it anymore.

they can't admit it because meteion believes atlas was one of the only people that never stopped believing in her, that never gave up hope for her. the fact atlas did eats at them, but to admit it—to confess that meteion was, at least sometimes, right about them—would be to obstruct her way. the truth would hinder meteion, possibly irreversibly, and so not only can atlas not tell her because they are not designed to obstruct someone's hope, they wouldn't even if they could. they don't think they could live with it being more than a ghost in their head, especially if anything happened to meteion as a result of it.