#kev's boyfie x

[whysojiminimnida]

AND THEN JUNG HOSEOK SAID --

"Oh, Jimin left him at home." I DIED Y'ALL. SEVERAL TIMES. Also the entire photo section of this post will consist of pictures of my cat Yoongi and the shit he has gotten in the mail recently. Yoongi has a new toy named Jack. Make of that what you will. ANYWAY.

He's gonna burn it down, burn it all down. SO WHAT HAD HAPPENED WAS -- I was in Florida and I had a little emergency hospital visit which was unplanned. There was also a Jimin's birthday and a whole ass Busan concert and a Live and a military enlistment announcement which: I can't talk about that. I CAN'T. So don't ask me. And I had an otherwise lovely time and got home to one Very Cranky Oppa, Kevin having been informed of my "Oh Shit Here We Go Again With This Bullshit" thing. Man was mad. Like, hovering mad. All up in my business and stuff. We love Kevin From Itaewon, okay, and we are also being very, very kind to him and to his boyfie X FOREVER. Not just because Park Jimin was in X's apartment but also for that reason. And there was a day recently when Kevin called to grouch at me. There were all the days, really. He's been on his oppa shit for a solid month. But this one day it was midday my time so ASS O'CLOCK in Seoul. Kev was staying at X's because Kevin's place is in Itaewon and Very Awful Things have been going on there. You know I told you Kev and X maintain two residences? Turns out that has been one small blessing in that whole ass nightmare over there. But at Kevin's house you don't often hear the tinkling of a GIGGLING PARK JIMIN IN THE NEXT ROOM. And he was not alone.

When Jimin said my name I thought he said "Hello Jewelry" and I was about to offer him my grandmother's wedding set and my mom's tennis bracelet. But instead I said "Hi Jimin-ssi saranghaeyo" and "Hi Hobi-nim saranghae!" and they were very kind. And then I was asked if my dream came true (X was, in his defense, drunk, did I mention?) and I said, because I am an entire idiot,

"No." "No?!" "Next time bring Jungkook-ssi", says still reasonably formal but definitely insane person holding my phone. (It was me, I'm the insane person). LAUGHTER. UPROARIOUS, UNBRIDLED AMUSEMENT. There was a thump, which Kev said "Oh Jimin fell" and some choking and I swear before God, JIMIN SNORTGIGGLED AT ME and Hobi let out the horsiest, cutest guffaw, like, they may have all been tipsy is all I'm saying. Kevin was appalled, probably. I wasn't paying attention to him. "Oh, Jimin left him at home" said one Jung Hoseok. IN ENGLISH. I mean, I didn't know Hobi was down with past tense and grammar and shit but HE SAID ITJUST LIKE THAT. AND LAUGHED. And then Park Jimin giggled. HE GIGGLED HE SOUNDS LIKE AN ANGEL I LOVE HIM SO MUCH YOU GUYS OMG

And then Kevin said "say goodbye" and instead I said "daedanhi kamsahamnida" which is "thank you so so so much" but I said that too and Jimin said "very nice to meet your jewelry" and Kevin was like "girl I'mma call you back when you can breathe without crying" and ...that was it. That was all she wrote. It ain't all I'm gonna write but the conversation was over. And about twenty minutes later after I resurrected again I was like WAIT.

WHAT.

Because, like, I don't know what all X has told Hobi and or Jimin about me. But I feel pretty confident that HOBI MADE A JIKOOK REFERENCE and there are two possible explanations: 1. They were just drunk as fuck and messing with a known ARMY; OR

2. That man was not thinking and told the truth. Jimin left Koo at home to go out with Hobi. At HOME. At ostensibly HIS HOME. Where Jungkook may also reside, at least occasionally. One of those things is true. Unless you think I'm yanking your chain. Which: I have no proof I'm not, at least no proof I'm willing to share. What I will share is that Yoongi the cat (or possibly yours truly) has been receiving regular deliveries from Hybe ever since. Nothing major and mostly the stuff is readily available on Weverse. No notes in it or anything, just.... stuff.

Stuff I have not ordered or paid for and there are no packing slips or invoices to tell me who did. It doesn't show up in my Weverse app. It just.... shows up.

I was GONNA get the photobook I swear to God I had intended to order it but it just.... arrived. I pulled Taehyung.

SOPE IS REAL THIS IS MY PHOTO PROOF LOOK AT YOONGI KISSING J-HOPE Mostly it's been Hoseok-related. Kev and X disavow all knowledge. If one of you did it, please do let me know. But I like to think it's no coincidence that Yoongi is now the proud owner of an Arson candle and a Jack In the Box.

I mean. It's cute stuff and I super wanted all of it but let's be real, here. If you'd rather believe this never happened and I just made it up out of my head, I would not even blame you. No dates, no sources, no pics, no receipts, nothing that could not have been ruthlessly fabricated and/or preordered by me and expeditiously shipped. Right? RIGHT.

But if you wanna squeal with me I won't get mad at you, either :) And yes, I do think the Jeon-Parks are jeonparking. I also think Jimin had his wisdom teeth out but who the hell knows.

[whysojiminimnida]

Seoul Tries To Cancel Pride ... Again

I know, I know. There is BTS media floating around that I have not yet covered, but Y'ALL THIS IS IMPORTANT OKAY

So basically what happened is, the Seoul Queer Culture Festival, every year, has to declare its use of public property to have the Pride parade. X tells me that "everyone knew" it was gonna be a problem this year, as it has been in the past, because of the new government. And sure enough that's what happened. The City of Seoul took the declaration (not permission, because groups don't need permission) to committee and, surprise surprise, the committee said "Nope, don't think so, LGBTQ+ people, not in our backyard, utensils". Last year the Culture Festival's org tried apply for nonprofit status and that was denied, and that under the Moon administration, so it's no shock that a country who voted for Yoon would also have mega-asshole level conservatives in City government. They do. Something about how they might sell explicit baked goods.

The cookies in question, possibly. This week, US President Joe Biden is visiting Seoul. Which is led by Mayor Oh Se-hoon of the People Power Party (President Yoon's party). Mayor Oh is actively trying to block Seoul Pride and also says - out lout - that LGBTQ+ equality is unconstitutional. Maybe Biden will take notice, or not.

And what does this have to do with BTS? Only everything, if you believe (as I do) that at least three members are absolutely not heterosexual and possibly as many as ALL of them are part of the community. Certainly they're all allies, who want equality for their own queer loved ones, if not for themselves. Love is love. Just let people live, omg, as I am wont to say, but also what kind of bullshit is getting perpetrated behind the scenes on our guys, who are under immense pressure right now? Not that they could even GO to Pride but wouldn't it be great if they knew it was happening, that change was coming?

Some brave members of the community are protesting one at a time in front of City Hall pending Pride on June 1. Kev doesn't usually get to go (his job, closets, etc) but X does, and he's planning to be there this year whether it's "canceled" or not.

Swing some chickens for my favorite homosexuals, willya? They're being oppressed. The hate is real, in Korea. And the next time anyone comes at you about the Jeon-Parks being in the closet, you can show them exactly WHY.

[whysojiminimnida]

Ive never heard Jk talk about kids before… I know Jimin always wanted to be a dad.. as a queer person myself ( very homophobic country) I feel for them. I know it’s possible to have kids as a queer couple.. there are ways in which you can achieve this..but it is so much more difficult. Can you imagine.. seeing them as dads.. raising a family together? How cute would that be!! Ugh my heart 😭😩 little parkjeons running around .. I’ll just stop

AH THANK YOU WISE ANON you showed up at just the right time. Opiates for butthurt are inappropriate use of opiates is all I'm gonna say about that but in fairness my sciatic nerve had one too many people STANDING ON IT so here have some love and appreciation

I'm not sure about that second one just go with it. ANYWAY YES. OMG. So Kev and X and I have this new thing where they hover and I allow it and one of the many things we discuss is kids. In Korea gay parenting is nearly impossible, especially under the current administration. It would just involve too much lying and that's not okay to do to kids, assuming kids can be found (girls can, and money works, but.)

So they don't have kids. But they will. It's one of the big reasons they're moving to the US part time. Roughly half the year is the plan and they intend to marry here. They will maintain one property - the largest home, for the family - in Korea. One in the US. The dream to is have the children back in Korea full time by high school and that seems... optimistic, but maybe? We can hope.

And the kids will be by necessity adopted, or possibly a surrogate will be utilized because Kev very much wants to be a biodad. X really wants to adopt, they may end up doing both. And I want to be there for that kid or those kids or all the kids. Auntie Jaya at your service, for real. And I imagine the Jeon-Parks have already talked about this. There may even be a plan in place, for later. Maybe much later.

Gay parents are, in my experience, AMAZING parents. Because it is hard, it is expensive, it takes years usually, and it is a CHOICE. A very conscious choice.

I want that for the Jeon-Parks, if they want it. And I think they do.

[whysojiminimnida]

Hello YSJ! Love your blog! Would love to hear your opinion on why JM and JK wrote in English on each other’s b-day cakes rather than in Korean.

That is an excellent question. And I have opinions. OF COURSE I DO I ALWAYS HAVE OPINIONS ARE WE EVEN SURPRISED NO, NO WE ARE NOT SURPRISED But first, illustrations:

So I thought, WELL. We must have some amazing Magic Gay Code happening here. If it isn't in Korean maybe they're sending us a message. Maybe this is a Rainbow Connection Moment of some type. So I went LOOKING. And found:

So I was like

"Well we cannot use the queerness or lack thereof of BTS as a guideline because we're all a little bit gay here we have not been properly informed as to the gayness level of most of these men SO I BETTER GO LOOK FURTHER

And at several higher-end Korean bakeries I found

OKAY. Google was, I will have you know, ZERO HELP. So I did what any God-fearing American White Girl would do and I shot a message a couple time zones over to my friend X, who just so happens to be stateside on business right now. (And also possibly looking for houses but that's another post).

"WHY KOREAN BIRTHDAY CAKES IN ENGLISH" I asked articulately. Leave me alone it was a couple nights ago and I was on morphine derivatives and muscle relaxers. So if I missed anything in this conversation that's why. "HI I'M VERY DRUNK RIGHT NOW" X replied loudly. It felt loud because he was in a club or something. It was loud. I allowed as how I was gonna call Kev in Itaewon to get answers and X said TEXT ME BITCH and I said YOU DO NOT NEED ALL THE DETAILS ANYWAY

Drunk X said that actually, it's... just trendy. Literally, that's why. Because "candles in Hangul really are kinda hard to make work" which makes sense and also that "Korean cakes aren't as elaborate as the ones here" and "English denotes a little higher class, like you're cool enough to read your decorations" whatever the hell that means.

He says you go to the bakery and there are English phrases you can choose from, or someone probably knows enough English to get the job done or if you are very personalization-oriented they will give you an icing sleeve thingy and you can do it yourself at some places. THAT'S WHAT THE GAY KOREAN MAN SAID IT'S MY ANSWER. So I go "no gay coding then" and he said "only in the way that gay people buy better cakes." I guess that's why, then. We stan our world-citizen metropolitan extra cool English-cake-deco kings.