#kakashi is the last person to know he retired tbh

[dark-elf-writes]

I just woke up from a very short dream where Konoha was peaceful after Naruto took over and as kakashi got older and the fighting stayed inactive, he noticed his stomach get a bit of squish to it. Just him poking his stomach in front of the mirror and realizing he doesn’t have like washboard abs for the first time since he was capable of developing muscle mass. And finally realizing the peace will last. Has lasted. That he hasn’t been sent to kill for years now and won’t be ever again.

THANK YOU UNCONSCIOUS BRAIN! That was a magnificent idea.

Kakashi doesn’t really notice it at first, how could he when he’s making sure his former student settles into his new role and staying close by just in case he needs help or advice or anything really. Not that he looks like he’s hovering, sprawled out over a couch Naruto had moved into the Hokage office and pretending to read as he listened for any threat. Shikamaru rolls his eyes whenever he sees him. Naruto never kicks him out though. He does, however keep pushing water and tea and food into Kakashi’s hands, griping about him not being allowed to starve himself in his office.

Everyone seems to be pushing food on him, he realizes later. Guy dragging Kakashi out for dinner, Sakura bringing two bentos when she stops by for her weekly bitching session report with him and Naruto, Anko giving him a stick of dango as she bemoans her eyes being bigger than her stomach. Shikamaru keeps pushing water and tea at him as well as Naruto. Says something about how both of them would drop dead of dehydration if he wasn’t there. While that was probably true Kakashi preferred to believe the Nara was slowly trying to drown them one glass of water at a time.

He doesn’t notice until Pakkun points it out one morning as he walks around his house without a shirt (without a mask. When did he start feeling comfortable with his face uncovered even in his own home?)

“You look better with more meat on your bones. Less like you’re going to die if you miss a damn meal.” Kakashi blinked, looking down at himself and poking at the soft skin of his stomach.

There was still muscle there of course. He would never stop training even if peace lasted until the day he died but…

He looked more like Guy now he realized, just as strong but without the definition. He thought he liked it. Liked not being able to see the clear cuts between his muscles. Liked looking a bit softer. Still,

“Maa, are you telling me to go on a diet, Pakkun?”

The ninken bares his teeth at him, waiting for him to settle onto the couch (an exact copy of the one in naruto’s office. a gift from Sasuke with a deadpan expression and humor glinting in his eyes) before jumping up to lay on his stomach, making sure his paws dig in just a bit to hard to prove his point.

“No. You’re far more comfortable now.”

Kakashi hums as Pakkun settles down for a nap and decides that the village wouldn’t fall if he took a day off from lurking around his student’s office before settling back into the cushions to join him.

[imaginarianisms]

⭐

o river u already Know. its been 84 years ur honor. toka & chitose is the oldest dynamic the two of us have that goes back litcherally years & tbh that makes me kinda shooketh. lmao i also vaguely remember momoka & her siblings having a really sweet dynamic w/ chitose. tōka leaves konoha after.. i believe training kushina & she's old enough to take care of herself iirc due to retiring & having lost pretty much everyone save for momoka her only remaining daughter & konoha bringing back too many bad memories as she's the last pureblooded senju by the end of the second shinobi world war, but if she ever were to discover yamato's identity she'd be Very interested in him & his development & would naturally want to protect him even if he's not a senju. she has hashirama's mokuton dna implanted in her in her main verse as hashirama allowed her to as written on his will. momoka, however, in her main verse, lives until the uchiha clan massacre so it's Very possible that she'd know who yamato is. momoka also trained kakashi's father, sakumo & knew him personally growing up as well as trained kushina to contain the kyuubi so idk maybe he'd want to talk to her. she's survived three shinobi world wars. there's stories bound to be shared. lmao. i also offer any of my current era naruto muses for chitose & kakashi !!

u Know im down 4 anything atp

Send a " ⭐ " and I will list muses I would be interested in throwing at yours, or potential muse combinations if you are also a multi. If you like any of the suggested combinations, you are welcome to come plot or start interactions with them. || @shinobinvku || OPEN; ACCEPTING.

[phoenixyfriend]

Madara and Obito... In SPACE

So the preface to this mess: I don’t know jackshit about Star Wars, so a lot of this went through friends who do know Star Wars (the primary of which does not have a tumblr).

(I have watched Episodes 7&8, and Rogue One. Of the first six movies, I remember watching maybe an hour total. I have not seen more than snatches of Clone Wars. Beyond that, nothing but fic.)

Anyway! Let’s go:

As y’all probably know by now, my favorite form of crossover is what I call “intrusive,” so... I'm enjoying the mental concept of "dump Madara on Coruscant and watch him go." (Prequels, probably.)

Does Madara know what's going on? No. Can he understand a word that's being said? No! Is he going to fight the first person to aim a weapon at him, and every person after that? Yes.

Is Madara fighting fit?

Nnnnnnnnnnnnnno, not really, he’s old as balls. This is "I was on cave life support but I'm getting back up to kick ass out of pure spite" Madara.

[Image description: A screenshot of a panel of the Naruto Manga. Uchiha Madara is old and visibly ‘decrepit,’ with spiky white hair and an amorphous black robe. He is sitting on a pale throne, and there is a scythe visible to the side. He has a speech bubble saying “I am... a ghost of the Uchiha.” End Description]

Two wrinkly old guys, staring each other down: There ain't enough room in this universe for the two of us. [Palpatine and Madara start fighting to the death]

Congrats, Palpatine! Your ass is getting kicked by a geriatric malcontent who doesn't speak any language you've ever heard or feel like literally anything in the Force. You may have Sith lightning, but do you have decades of frontline experiences and over half a century of cave-dwelling bitterness?

Both of them, simultaneously, in completely different languages: Get off my lawn, whipper-snapper.

Palpatine: Behold my mastery of the Dark Side, Foolish old man! Palpatine: [shoots lightning] Madara: Oh hey, you're like the seventeenth most dangerous person who can shoot lightning I've fought. Telekinesis? Fought that. Combat precognition? Fought that, have that, and let me tell you hwat, it doesn't help if you're opponent is just that much faster than you.

Now, I’ll take a step back and acknowledge that several people advised me that Palpatine would stand a chance against Madara, likely even win, if Madara just got hacked off of his life support and is down to one eye.

But. I want a shitpost, and also to clown on Palpatine, so Madara wins easily.

Madara also deserves to be clowned on, but the entire situation is clowning on him because he’s not in his cave anymore, and he really wants to go back to his Gedou Mazou statue.

Maybe Madara and Palpatine go Old Man Fight and then Obito just pulls a Ninja Move and kills Palpatine that way. Madara was ranting and Obito just. Ninjas behind Palpatine and slits his throat like “okay, you’re obviously evil so like... bye.”

(I just love causing "Wait what" reactions in characters that are used to having total control. Like. Have you read "Unexpected Guests"? The Bleach fic? Everything that happens in Hueco Mundo and after. That energy. I want that energy.)

Madara waves his scythe around like a cane. Obito just trails after like “Gramps, no” because it’s still pre-Sanbi, so he’s Mostly Innocent (you know, on the scale of how fucked up Obito is as a person), and just wants Madara to like. Stop.

Palpatine dies but nobody's sure what to charge Madara with since he did kind of expose a Sith? And Palpatine attacked first for [handwave] reasons?

Jedi: Well sir, in lieu of charging you with assassination of the emperor, we have decided to ask you politely to return to the elderly person's retirement home from whence you came. Please leave immediately. You are frightening the senate. Madara: [incomprehensible raving] Jedi: Yes yes, very interesting. Jedi, whispering: Does anyone know his caretaker???

Obito looks increasingly put-upon as events progress. You need Obito there to... well, not translate. Nobody can translate. But to at least poke Madara into being Slightly Less Homicidal.

Anakin seems sad about his friend dying and being evil so Obito challenges him to a spar. Madara and Obito get pulled into the Jedi Temple to help train Padawans? My first thought was "they wouldn't trust someone so obviously Weird, Crazy, and Incomprehensible around the younglings" and my second thought was "well they let Yoda do it and he's all those things so I mean? YEAH."

What if they put Madara in the bacta tank and he just freshened up like a daisy because of hand-wave Hashirama cell reasons (Blame Sir Tiddyface).

From “Decrepit and Reliant on Cave Tube Life Support” to “Will Call Down Meteors With Ease”

How many eyes does he have? Whatever’s funniest. Let’s say one Eternal Mangekyo Sharingan and one Rinnegan, for maximum chaos.

Would "half my body is missing" Obito freak out if Bacta regrew his eye? Can bacta regrow something like that? When characters lose limbs they usually just get cybernetic replacements, but  the person I spoke with said that apparently they saw somewhere that that kind of thing can grow back it just takes a really long time.

I want to imagine bacta would help Obito with the Zetsu integration.

Anyway! Yes. Have Madara help train people despite being... Madara about it. You know... kind of a dick.

(I’d put example gifs but I don’t feel up to it. Y’all know what Madara’s “weakness disgusts me” ass is like.)

Obito had to get his "these fools could never make me sweat" sass from somewhere, after all.

Do you think Obito could fight the baby Jedi that are around his age while recovering? I have no idea what their skill level is at fourteen, but I want to imagine Obito sparring the Padawans.

Obito + Zetsu + Bacta = he still needs physical therapy but he can spar again!

Madara is delighted to have a baby ninja to bully. He's too old to not bully baby ninjas, and Obito is the only baby ninja. TBH Madara just makes Obito his assistant teacher.

Obito: What are we even doing here and how do we get home? Madara: I'm still working on that. Obito: But I want to go home and see Rin and Kakashi! Madara, who was like two days away from triggering the Sanbi plan: I'm working on it.

Something sticking in my mind rn is Ahsoka&Obito, since Obito is still Baby.

I think Obito would be excited to have someone his age that thought he was Cool and Talented for being able to do Chakra Things instead of writing him off as "the dead-last." Like, Rin is friends with him, but she doesn't look up to him as someone more/differently talented.  He'd be excited to get to be "The Mysterious Cool Big Bro" for once.

I feel I also just like the idea of Anakin not knowing what to do with someone Several Years Younger that is also. Ninja Skill.

Miscellaneous thoughts:

Madara is a grouchy old man even AFTER he gets effectively de-aged via bacta dunk, for the record. He's back in his prime and the Jedi have no idea how. They're all concerned about tiddyface*. (When are people not concerned about Sir Tiddyface, really.) The mokuton is a problem.

*Sir Tiddyface is that random Hashirama face that Madara had growing out of his pecs for like... convoluted bullshit reasons.

(Madara doesn't have mokuton, but he has enough Hashirama cells that it interacted very, VERY weirdly with the bacta.)

Obito spends the intervening weeks trying to learn the local language. He's very eager. Not particularly fast. Still doing it though!

I want Obito juggling kunai as physical therapy while he's waiting for Mads to get out of the bacta tank and just gains himself the adoration of a gaggle of small baby Jedi children.

Madara comes out of the bacta tank looking like he did in his prime (which I mentioned earlier but whatever), and it absolutely incites a yelling match of an argument that draws way too much attention.

Someone tries to teach Obito how to access the Force, just to see what happens. He almost turns into a statue because the philosophy behind Force meditation is only a few steps away from Sage Mode Meditation.

Anyway, Madara smacks him with a stick like Fukasaku to make sure Obito doesn't turn into stone.

Madara grumps about the lack of paper and brushes and ink. Bitches about it until someone hits up an antique store or something to get them for him. The day before he and Obito are dispatched on a mission with someone, probably Anakin for plot reasons, Madara very publicly seals things into a scroll and then tells them that no, they can't learn it, because the Force isn't chakra so fuuinjutsu won't work for them, so There.

Obito practices some Teen Rebellion (tm) and like, tries to teach the Padawan friends he's made how to do Chakra Things... but he's so bad at explaining things that nobody can get it to work even if it were possible.

In Obito's defense, language barriers. Not in Obito's defense, he's just really bad at words sometimes.

[jacksgreysays]

Shikako Nara's Guide To Delinquency and Military Insurrection, 2/? (2018-02-03)

(Rule Two: those who abandon their comrades are worse than trash)

Mikoto is checking the perimeter.

Checking the perimeter--ha! what an unnecessary thing to do with a Hyuuga on her team. The last time she actually checked the perimeter was probably during practice missions in the Academy, before she got assigned on a team with one of strongest Byakugan users and a chakra sensor whose range is only rivaled by her insane capacity.

Even with the near endless amount of ROOT teams after them, blank porcelain masks to match their blank emotionless faces, there's no real reason for Mikoto to check the perimeter.

As if it weren't just an excuse to get some space from her teammates, just a moment of manufactured solitude to breath and enjoy the cool, quiet night air and internally freak the fuck out over her life choices.

Defect from Konoha?! What the fuck was she thinking? She spent YEARS proving her worth to her assbackwards, misogynistic clan elders--clawing her way up to a jounin ranking despite their opinions about retiring at chuunin to bear children and contribute to the clan--and... well, actually, put like that it's maybe more of a surprise that she didn't defect earlier.

But she was willing to put up with all that bullshit because she did, despite the elders, love her clan and her village. She loved being a shinobi of Konoha.

But she loves her friends more.

Even when it's been nearly a month on the run from Creepy Councilor Shimura's hunter-nins trying to drag them back for, no doubt, imprisonment and torture and experimentation and, eventually, execution.

For her and Hizashi, at least. Konoha's not going to execute their only Uzumaki and jinchuuriki.

But just because Konoha would never kill Kushina, doesn't mean they would never hurt her. Or haven't ever done so before.

And Hizashi may be one of the strongest Byakugan users in the village, one of the Hyuuga clan head's sons even, but he's not the right son. Not the one who lucked into the Main Family, free from a slavery seal that could and would be used against him. By his own clan.

By his own twin brother.

And of course, Kushina couldn't leave that alone. And no one has ever built a seal that a trained Uzumaki didn't consider absolute child's play.

But every action has its consequences--it seems like these past few months have been nothing but dealing with consequences--and now they're on the run from creepy Councilor Shimura's minions in the middle of nowhere chasing some rumors about some other Uzumaki in the hopes that...

In the hopes of what?

This other Uzumaki will see Kushina and fall over themselves to welcome a long lost relative? Haven't they just escaped from a village full of awful relatives?

And even if this other Uzumaki were the welcoming sort, whose to say they'd even be powerful enough to protect them from the full wrath of Konoha?

Mikoto loves her village, she does, even now, but Konoha--for all their reputation as the friendly one--is not one for mercy.

A part of her foolishly, futilely, wishes for their jounin sensei. Wishes that Kiyoshi-sensei were still alive to make everything better--to sweep in and make the problem go away with a few select whispers in certain ears and a convoluted exchange of favors amongst the village's different departments.

But they are far from Konoha, further still from being those silly little genin trailing admiringly in their sensei's wake, and anyway how selfish is she? She should be wishing that Kiyoshi-sensei were still alive for little Kakashi's sake, not to cover up for their own grown-ass mistakes.

Although, if Mikoto is being honest, she'd probably do the same exact thing because  she does, actually, love her friends.

It's a presence more than a sound that catches her attention, and her hypervigilance has her activating her Sharingan immediately.

The girl who steps into her line of sight is not a ROOT agent--or if she is, she's a level higher than the rest--because her facial features shift into an actual human expression. Bizarrely, that expression is an almost sheepish resignation.

Mikoto spots Hizashi lurking in the trees behind their visitor ready to pounce while Kushina comes barreling in with all the subtlety and grace of a wounded water buffalo.

The girl just sighs as if she weren't surrounded by three Konoha jounin.

Sorry, three former Konoha jounin.

"Okay..." the girl says, not bothered whatsoever, "I was supposed to be on my way to Wind Country right now, but the three of you seem to be in some kind of trouble..."

Mikoto catches the brief flicker of annoyance on Hizashi's face before he shrugs and drops down to the ground, no use in hiding if she already knows he’s there.

"... and given that I just killed a team of ROOT flunkies who were headed in this direction, and all of your headbands have those super fashionable lines across the leaf, I'm pretty sure I know what the problem is, and I thought I should at the very least offer my services," the girl rambles on, ignoring the surprised and confused glances Mikoto exchanges with her teammates.

"What are you even talking about?" Kushina asks, patience finally giving way to frustration.

Now it's the girl's turn to look surprised and confused. She looks at them like they should already know:

"The assassination of Danzo Shimura, of course."

~

A/N: Shikako just barging and dropping cool one liners and breaking the minds of everyone around her. So hip.

Anyway, just a little personal headcanon for Team... uh... I dunno, Pretty Long-haired Parents. Specifically, Mikoto Uchiha, Hizashi Hyuuga, and Kushina Uzumaki. The timing probably doesn’t work--and Kushina was probably not on a team or Hizashi was on a different team or whatever whatever--but according to SQ “the timeline is made up and facts don’t matter” so I can do whatever I want.

I mean, not as much as Shikako can do whatever she wants, but still.

Speaking of, not that it much matters (I probably could have deleted that paragraph, tbh, but I just wanted it so much) but their jounin sensei is my (In)Difference OC Kiyoshi Utsugi who is also Kakashi’s mom--hence why I tagged it here even if it’s not canon for that either.

I dunno! I just wanted cool team combos!

I’ll probably do a Character Stats post for this bunch also.

[mugiwara-lucy]

Boruto: Naruto Next Generations Episode 20 Review-DEM EYES & Papa-Daughter Time-My Thoughts/Review!

Hi, everyone! Emi’s here for my review of episode 20 of Boruto: Naruto Next Generations!

Now I know everyone might wanna rip me a new asshole for being a day late but I highly recommend you read this post of mine I made yesterday!

http://mrs-gossipgirl.tumblr.com/post/164227588887/whats-your-schedule-like-this-year

In any case, let’s dive in!!

The episode starts off from the last one where the masked person who attacked Sasuke is later revealed to be Celebi!

Or rather his lookalike XP

This raises massive red flags for Sasuke who decided to send a message to Naruto via his handy-dandy traveling hawk

This then leads Naruto to contact Kakashi who estimates that the person who attacked Sasuke might be an Uchiha survivor

Jeesh, Naruto! Let an old man relax when he wants to retire! Geez....

But on a serious note, Kakashi’s note honestly makes a lot of sense because just because Itachi killed the Uchiha who were in the Leaf Village doesn’t mean those were the only Uchihas in the world so there possibly could be more Uchiha around.

Just Saiyan.

Speaking of said “Uchihas”, we see how the mysterious boy meets with a cloaked figure who looks to be his master. And it’s shown how they both consider Sasuke to be nothing more than a disgrace to the Uchiha, mainly because he killed Itachi.

Then again, Itachi is the revered fan favorite of the series.

.....Save for Minato and Madara XD

In any case, we switch to Sarada who visits her mother in the hospital before going to her closet and dons her Gaiden/Boruto movie garb

FINALLY!!!!!! I was WONDERING how long it’d be before she wears this outfit again!!

Soon after, we see her follow Naruto who leaves the village before being stopped by Chocho who wants to find “her real parents”.

.....Yeah XD

In any case, before Sarada and Chocho can go aware, they notice how Boruto arrived at the village gate to give Naruto a boxed lunch that Hinata made for him but he left. This leads to Sarada wanting to deliver it to Naruto for him while this also leads to a small argument between Boruto wanting Sarada to drop it while Sarada insisted before he eventually gave in, thanks to Shikamaru.

As Sarada and Chocho finally leave the village we see what looks to be a mini version of the Ten Tails watching the two from afar

Seriously, you can’t tell me that DOESN’T look like the Ten Tails!

Following this we jump back to the site of the mysterious boy and the cloaked figure who now have a special interest in Sarada due to being the daughter of Sasuke

Said daughter is later ambushed by the mysterious man which leads to a brief altercation

The two are quickly overwhelmed and it seems all is lost.

Until Lord Hokage saved the day!

In order to combat the mysterious foe, Naruto powers up into his Nine Tailed Tailed Beast Mode

Beautiful!

...Although I have to say this looks kind of.....underwhelming when I compare it to the manga

Just a small nitpick XP

In any case, Naruto easily disposes of the kid and before anything bad happens, the mini ten tails clone teleports the kid away using his own version of Kamui

Naruto then powers down before quickly deducing the kid was after Sasuke.

Because after all, what’s the series without Sasuke? XD

Okay, I just got the idea for a POTENTIAL future post! I might do a post analyzing the series WITHOUT Sasuke.

I can say the series WON’T have a happy ending. Yes I know A LOT of people hate him but he’s VERY, VERY important to the series.

A series without Sasuke is like Dragon Ball without Vegeta. (I’m ready for the flames for that comment XD)

Sarada then decides to give Naruto the lunch box Hinata made, thus triggering a memory of the bell test when Sakura and Sasuke fed him

Naruto then thanks Sarada before deciding to have lunch time with Sarada and Chocho.

Lucky! I WANT lunch time with Naruto!! =(

Okay, sorry for that XD

Getting serious, Sarada is curious about Sasuke and how he was as a kid and Naruto then decides to give them his tale of how Sasuke was in comparison to him.

To start, Sasuke was a playa just like Naruto.

Okay, technically Naruto is a ladies man with a Tropes Page about him listed under “Clueless Chick Magnet” as well as “Chick Magnet” so that’s not TOTAL BS XD

Here’s the page if anyone’s interested XD

http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/CluelessChickMagnet/AnimeAndManga

That ain’t a lie :3

How many pics do I have of Naruto like that on my hard drive? :3 You all don’t need to know XD

Sasuke was also at the top of his class in ninjutsu like Naruto

Sorry, Nardo. Can’t defend ya here! XD

Props to Chocho for calling that out XD

The most honest comment from Naruto was how Sasuke was essentially a prick, unlike him.

SO FRIKKIN TRUE.

But if there’s one thing that will ALWAYS be true is that Sasuke is Naruto’s boyfri-I mean Rival.

This vid sums up the entire of Shippuden, TBH

Naruto also then points out how Sarada is essentially the spitting image of Sasuke while she has Sakura’s personality

The trio then finish their lunch before making their way to where Naruto will rendezvous with Sasuke. While taking breaks of course. On the way there we see how Sarada feels relaxed when she’s around Naruto.

Then again Karin did say how “bright and warm” Naruto’s chakra was

After a few more trekking, Naruto, Sarada and Chocho eventually make their way and are in route to a green tower where Naruto will meet Sasuke.

Sarada then has to “go to the bathroom” which is later revealed to be a plot for her to meet Sasuke for the first time.

We see this desire is so deep and emotional that it awakens the Sharingan in her

1 Totem Sharingan I should add!

Sarada then makes her way inside the tower where she discovers the Sauce in all his glory!

However....before a tearful daughter-father reunion can take place...

Sasuke turns his blade on Sarada!!

And that’s the episode.

My thoughts on it?

1.) The animation and soundtrack. I liked the soundtrack used in this episode and I think the one where we see *SPOILER ALERT* Shin was a new one. And the animation was better than episode 167 BUT I still think the scene I mentioned above with Naruto in his chakra mode was kinda underwhelming compared to the manga, haha.

2.) Plot Progression. Considering how we’ve covered FOUR out of the ten chapters for Naruto Gaiden, we’ve made AMAZING plot progression! Especially considering how Sarada has finally come in contact with Sasuke. Although I wouldn’t want to be on the wrong side of Sauce’s sword :O And I’m also shocked SP is really getting through Gaiden at this rate. HECK, we could be done by late August or early September at the rate we’re going!!!

And speaking of Sarada this brings me to my next point:

3.) Sarada’s outfit change. I am SO happy Sarada is wearing her Naruto Gaiden/Boruto Movie outfit! I mean look at it! It looks kickass!!

However, unlike 75 % of the fandom I don’t hate Sarada’s “next generation” outfit though. I think it’s pretty adorable!!

As I’ve said countless times on my blog, I think people are making a mountain out of a molehill over her outfit. Especially considering how I’ve seen people call Ikemoto a PEDOPHILE.

SMH.

But something I noticed in this episode concerning Sarada’s outfit, if you noticed, she got the outfit out of a closet in Sakura’s room so is the outfit Sakura’s outfit??

Just something to ponder.

4.) Spoilers! I’ve already read all this in its manga presentation two years ago and for the sake of anime ONLY people, I won’t spoil anything for anyone. ^_^

5.) My review schedule. Okay, so some of you may be wondering why this review came out a day later. Well I’ve gone back to school yesterday and as said in this post:

http://mrs-gossipgirl.tumblr.com/post/164227588887/whats-your-schedule-like-this-year

Mondays and Wednesdays are my busy days along with Fridays to an extent while on Tuesdays and Thursdays I only have one class in the morning so I’ll have these reviews out on THURSDAYS rather than Wednesdays.

Sorry for the inconvenience if it causes any but it’s something that has to be done.

In any case, thanks for reading and enjoying my review and I’ll see you all in NEXT week’s episode!! ^_^