#jv tiffany and co

[potomacdebateacademy]

Potomac secures Harvard CHAMPIONSHIP and more!

WOW! This past weekend has been truly a debate extravaganza.

As in the wise words of Coach Noah, “Debaters, regardless of your competitive record, I hope you know how proud the coaches are of your efforts preparing for, and competing at this tournament. I promise you, if you ask any coach or any of the many teams who had competitive success this weekend, they will tell you that you learn far more from your losses than your wins. HOLD YOUR HEADS UP HIGH!”

That said, we would like to recognize the following individuals for their achievements:

49th Harvard National Forensics Tournament

High School Congressional Debate

Quarterfinalists: Armaan S. & Avi A. - EARNING A GOLD BID TO THE 2023 TOC!

Avi and Armaan are now fully qualified to the Tournament of Champions, the most competitive debate tournament in the country; they’re the first students in Potomac’s Congress program to bid and to be fully qualified! GO ARMAAN & AVI!

High School Varsity Public Forum Semifinalists: Ruth D. & Aaron T. - EARNING A GOLD BID TO THE 2023 TOC!

Ruth and Aaron placed in the top 4 of 326 varsity debate teams. This is a massive achievement at one of the hardest tournaments in the country! GO RUTH & AARON!

Triple Octofinalists (Top 64): Benjamin T. & Luke W. and Preston L. & Zayd P. We also want to recognize Brooke C. & Carol L and Digonto C. & Dhira V. for having a 4-2 record!

Speaker Awards: 5th: Ruth D.

Ruth ranked as the 5th best speaker out of more than 620 students competing in Harvard’s varsity tournament! GOOOO RUTTHHHHH.

High School JV Public Forum Triple Octofinalists (Top 64): Ella L. & Thomas W.

Middle School Public Forum Co-Champions: Diya B. & Ayan M. + Roselyn B. & Tiffany T.

The teams above CLOSED OUT HARVARD’S MS DIVISION!!!! Meaning, they took home 1st and 2nd place respectively out of 119 teams from across the country!

Quarterfinalists (Top 8): Daniela A. & Mira K. Octafinalists (Top 16): Anika B. & Kaylynn Y. and Amber W. &a Natalie Z. Double Octafinalists (Top 32): Aahana G. & Cady W. and Maanit K. & Ava Y. Triple Octafinalists (Top 64): Rishik S. & Alex Y. and Veer P. & Samarth S. and Veda D. & Anthony L. and Nathaniel D. & Josh K.

Speaker Awards:  7th: Roselyn B.  10th: Tiffany T.  13th: Anika B.  15th: Amber W.  18th: Nathaniel D. The 2023 Milo Cup at Millard North High School Varsity Public Forum Semifinalists: Angela G. & Abigail H. - EARNING A GOLD BID TO THE 2023 TOC! Octofinalists: Grace L. & Katherine X.

Speaker Awards:  2nd: Katherine X.  5th: Abigail H.  9th: Grace L.  18th: Angela G. Finally, MAJOR CONGRATULATIONS to our super team of Kaden C., Jonathan F., Alex L., Derek M., Lily P., and Evelyn S. for advancing to the SWEET 16 ROUND! This means they are now officially within the Top 16 of teams and will continue onward in the 2022-2023 The International Public Policy Forum. Press release is available here: https://www.ippfdebate.com/announcing-the-2022-23-sweet-16

[abbydraper]

Bachelorette Bio Breakdown. Again.

I have said for like three years now I am done writing about this show, but the bios are just too damn fun to mock. So, here we are again. You’re welcome. 

Brian

They’re claiming he loves math so much that he is a teacher at the high school he went to. What that translates to is that he loves math so much he still lives in his mothers basement. The same one from high school. His favorite holiday is “Flag Day” which isn’t a real thing. 

Cam

He loves to be the “life of the party”, calls himself the “Dance Floor King”, can freestyle rap and play the harmonica. Basically what this means is that I will never attend a social event with Cam as he sounds like the actual death of the party. 

Chasen

Is that a real name? Chasen loves watching “The Bachelor” while drinking cocktails with his mom and has re-gifted Tiffany’s to his sister. I think Chasen would have more luck chasin’ the heart of a dude. 

Connor J. 

He says his biggest turn-off is a girl who gossips, which inevitably means he will be the first to run to Hannah with gossip because the people who say they hate gossip are the biggest gossips of them all. 

Connor S. 

Connor S. LOVES (all caps in bio, definitely not by me) Justin Bieber and listening and dancing to Spanish music, although he doesn’t speak the language. What this means to me is that he blasts “Despacito” and fucks up all of the lyrics. He does kind of resemble Luke Cafferty though... 

Daron

I feel like Daron was on FX’s “The People vs. OJ Simpson” and I just want to know what it was like to work with Sterling K. Brown. 

Devin

Devin is a talent manager who is good friends with a former “Bachelorette” suitor... so, I’m going to say Devin is here for the wrong reasons. I’m also curious if his haircut is intentional in this photo. I hope not. 

Dustin

I hope he put that he can beat anyone at Jenga so he can claim his pull-out game is strong because that’s my all time favorite pick-up line. Next to, “Nice shoes, wanna fuck?” 

Dylan

It says he is the co-founder of a fitness company that allows people to workout while donating food and this makes no sense to me. He also claims the majority of his friends are women and I’m going to guess that’s because he has a boat.  

Garrett 

Garrett is from Alabama and the date he mentioned involves football, so they’re just going to make out and yell, “Roll Tide” until he goes home for thinking Georgia has more romantic cities than Alabama. 

Grant

Grant is an actual asshole and quite proud of it. He has no interest in hearing about a workout or Instagram, so we’d totally get along. JK, he’d hate me. He also promises to call other men out this season who aren’t there for the right reasons. I see a two-on-one in his near future. See ya never. 

Hunter

A pro surfer living in California, still with his parents, that loves the water and wants to start a creative agency. What an enigma. 

Jed

How many singer/songwriters in Nashville do you think are named Jed? Jed is going to get out of the limo with his guitar and sing something stupid to Hannah. Calling it. 

Joe

His job title is, “The Box King” and I truly hope it is for the reason I want it to be. Joe has been to Vegas (from Chicago) four times this year so the box king enjoys gambling, strip clubs and pool parties. Yep, it means what I want it to. 

Joey

Honestly, I am shocked this guy isn’t a trainer. Look at him. Also he’s kind of old and boring to be on this show. 

John Paul Jones

Don’t even have to read further, I hate him. Then I read further to learn he requires you use all three of his names when addressing him AND he “rarely uses words that are less than three syllables long” so I actually hate him. Also, who fucking knows that about themselves? 

Jonathan

He claims he is the life of the party and we’ve already had another suitor claim that title, so, like -- life of the party-off? He also, “love sparklers” which seems like a weird thing to be passionate about. 

Kevin

Kevin seems like the kind of guy that has had at least two restraining orders filed against him. He wants to travel more but won’t go anywhere there isn’t a gym. Umm, I’m fairly certain cities all over the world offer hotels with a fitness center on-site, Kevin. 

Luke P.

This is definitely this seasons virgin. Maybe a “born again” virgin if that’s a real thing, but for sure a virgin of some sort. I feel like people who don’t have sex talk about sex more than people that do have sex. Relax.  

Luke S. 

Luke S. looks like the little kid in “Love Actually” who locks himself in his room because he is in love. He claims he looks like Nick Viall (he does not) and hit on Emily Ratajkowski, so he’s definitely not here for exposure. 

Matt Donald

Why are these men using more than one name? Also I won’t be able to look at him without singing, “Old Matt Donald” to the tune of “Old McDonald”. He claims he’s already in love with Hannah despite having not met her. We all know what happened to Shawn B., so things aren’t looking great for Old Matt Donald. 

Matteo

Um. "On the side” Matteo is a sperm donor with 114 children running around and I have so many questions. How does he know the number? How many times has he been intimate with himself and a cup? Why? When money is tight, don’t most people just ask their family for help? Is this normal? Is there a term for someone whose hobby is to donate sperm? WHAT IS HAPPENING HERE? 

Matthew

If Matthew wasn’t 23, I’d drive down to Newport tonight to meet him. What a dreamboat. 

Mike

Who was that guy on Kaitlyn’s season that was so arrogant and then he got down on his knee at MTA to apologize to all women? IAN! This is Ian reincarnate. Or rIANcarnate. 

Peter

He lives his life by thinking that simply by expecting good things to happen to you, they will. If that’s the case I’m expecting to win the lottery tomorrow and be a millionaire by Friday. 

Ryan

Ryan will be the first one this season to cry.

Scott

His bio is about as cliche as his name. He likes to day drink with his buddies, he acts like an asshole in public, he hits on waitresses when he’s drunk. If you’re looking for a “Scott” you can throw on a pair of short shorts and a cleavage-bearing tank top and head to your nearest rooftop bar. Scott will have a shot waiting for you. I promise. 

Thomas

Thomas played basketball over seas which I think means he played professional JV basketball. His nickname is “Mr. Fourth Quarter” and that doesn’t sound like something a man should brag about. 

Tyler C. 

There’s a lot to take in from Tyler. He has his MBA, but is using it in Jupiter, Fla.; He was drafted by the Ravens but couldn’t play because of a shoulder injury; He’s been in a serious relationship but it didn’t work out and now he’s on The Bachelorette. Tyler is the “almost made it” guy. Maybe he should be called “Mr. Fourth Quarter”. 

Tyler G. 

Tyler G. loves SoulCycle so much that he wrote it in his bio. I love you, Tyler G. However, he later admits that he adheres to a strict Keto diet, so like, let’s hit up a class, but I refuse to do brunch after. Ya know? 

Who do you think Hannah will choose? Also how many episodes until I am annoyed?