#just thought I'd yell a life update into the void

[destrachan]

me, very unfit and prone to injury due to Problems: I have decided to become a Figure Skater

[swordsmans]

hello, sorry to bother! I'm not sure how to start this, but I just wanted to say that I have thought abt Freight for /years/. I happened to stumble on my subscription to it from literally 10 years ago and figured I'd check your profile to see if you're still writing! and I was so pleasantly surprised to find you still kickin' and creating :') I remember finding Freight when it was still on chapter 2 and how closely I followed your updates. it was the first fic I can remember ever becoming invested in- like... I used to sit in bed at night and think about your au and all the parts in it! those versions of the characters- /your/ versions- were so near and dear to my heart as a young teen, and even 10 years later, I still think about your fic all the time.

I guess I just wanted to take the time to say that you have made a lasting impression on someone. the stuff you create matters. YOU matter. this story will forever be a part of me, I'm sure of it, and I am so grateful to have those fond memories of your story!! I still think about it all the time, and before tonight, I've always wondered if you continued writing and sharing your talent with the world. I'm genuinely relieved to see that you're still in this world, my friend :] and that you never stopped creating.

I wish nothing but the best for you- All the good fortune, happiness, and peace to you <3

hi hey hello howdy :3

first of all, you're not a bother. if you're not sure how to start, then i'm sure as hell not sure how to respond! full disclosure, I've been sitting on this ask for almost five months now, and--well, when i read it, i cried. and every time ive sat down to respond after, ive also cried. i am (in fact) a bit weepy right now, but im going to lean into it. ironic detachment humor is OUT and genuine emotional engagement with the things that move us is IN and i printed this out and im going to put it on my wall

this is a gift. you are a gift. thank you so much for reading my work, and thank you so much for stopping by to share your love with me. freight is twelve years old now and thats insane to think about. i wrote before but it's the story that made me a writer and it will always be something im so proud of (and owe so much to) even if it will never be finished in its current state.

i think all writers, authors, creatives, whoever create to communicate something through their work--it's different for everyone, but no one makes purposeless art. every story is unique, but I've always written for the same reason: because life is big and hard and empty, and i am terrified of being alone. maybe it's self-aggrandizing but to know that you can still, like, hear my voice a decade later--that i wasn't a teenager yelling into the void because i was scared, that someone was there to listen--and that they're not alone still, that part of me, because youre still listening to that voice, to me, because even if im older i'll always be an accumulation of everything ive always been. i cant articulate it. or--i could, but then this reply would be a thousand paragraphs long. so just. like. thank you.

thank you for reading my stuff, and for loving it, and for reaching out after so many years just to say hello. im sixteen and crying, and im twenty-eight and crying, and yeah it was fanfic but it was art, and it was real, and it had a purpose, we're both still here to remember it, and that's everything.

[hamcatburger]

Heyo, Hamcat/ Ham here! (⁠=⁠^⁠･⁠ｪ⁠･⁠^⁠=⁠)

I go by they/them pronouns but if you yell 'Oi, stupid!' in any direction I'd probably answer to that too.

/⁠ᐠ⁠｡⁠ꞈ⁠｡⁠ᐟ⁠\ I yeet doodles and the occasional proper art into the void here, I draw mostly my OCs tho! (Perhaps some fanart as a treat when I feel like it who knows?)

You can find all my art under the (hamcat draws) tag!

/⁠ᐠ⁠｡⁠ꞈ⁠｡⁠ᐟ\ Socials!

Side/spam blog @hamcatspamacc (but it's mostly me just reblogging things and occasional rambles...)

Bluesky: @/ hamcatburger

Artfight: Hamcatburger

Toyhou.se: Hamcatburger (i have not touched it much so its p empty...)

/⁠ᐠ⁠｡⁠ꞈ⁠｡⁠ᐟ⁠\ I also do doodle requests, (good if i know the character but if I don't you can send in some refs as well)(but they'll probably be simple sketches or something) art trades, collabs, bring it on i love collabing with other artists!

/⁠ᐠ⁠｡⁠ꞈ⁠｡⁠ᐟ⁠\ You can reuse my art for headers and/or icons as long as you credit me! (I don't think anyone would because it's mostly characters like one person other than me knows)(But still good to put a precaution here)

ALSO I LOVE CATS if you have any cat photos or just want to talk about cats please send them!!! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE i am on my knees...

Under the cut is my fandom list and tags if you wanna look through them or block them or anything!

re hams - for reblogs

hamchats - for random thoughts/text posts

OC and stories tags (ill add more if i ever do post art or write about them)

Thrys and Jing (two guys just running around doing stupid shit while not trying to get involved in a war)(Jing is by @mirikthepoet)

Away ham ver (man escapism is sure one hell of a interdimensional trip, isn't it?)(ham ver so that it doesnt get confused with other away tags)

The Revue of Syzergy (starlight revue OC stuff)(still thinking up of a better name lmao)

I'm pretty multifandom, but some things I'm interested in is:

- Dndads

- DND (in general)(like critical role/jocat's campaigns/legends or avantris/dimension20 etc)

- Ace attorney (specifically the Great Ace Attorney but all is good :)

- Vocaloid!

- The Magnus Archives

- BanG Dream Girls Band party (retired player but still a fan)(Kasuari my love)

- Rythm games in general

- Minecraft (Hermitcraft/life series/whitepine/parkciv etc)

- Good Omens

- Revue Starlight

- Welcome to Nightvale

- The Owl House

- Musicals in general

- Hamilton

- Cats (the musical)(casual enjoyer)

- Cult of the Lamb

- Fnaf

- ATLA

- OMORI

- Disco Elysium

- The Stanley Parable

- Will Wood

- Jojo's Bizarre Adventure (casual enjoyer rn)

- Professor Layton

- OFF

- Arcane (casual enjoyer)

- Legend of Zelda (mostly Botw and totk)

- Pokemon

- (Some) Gravity falls

- Genshin Impact (retired player but still somewhat casually enjoying the stories)(not the blatant whitewashing and cultural appropriation tho fuck you mihoyo)

- Most anime in general

- (Some) Danganronpa

- Loads of indie games (esp those with banger stories)

- Wandersong

- Chicory a colourful tale

- Stardew Valley

- Slay the Princess

- Dungeon Meshi

- Undertale/Deltarune

- (Some) My Little Pony

- (Not much anymore) Warrior cats

- Murder drones

- The Amazing Digital Circus

- Hololive (not too much anymore)

There's more that I can't quite remmeber right now but I'll update if there are any!

Stinker jumpscare

[sainadazai]

When your crush is angry all the time

Ch.4

I wanna be an intern too, you ragedy ann looking ass hoe 😠



Y/n pov

°•○●○•°•○●○•°

All goes well when you are ignorant is what my dear best friend would say to me now, as I sit in the very back of the class unfocused on how our teacher is introducing an activity I have no chance of participating in. All I knew was that when Mr. Aizawa walked up to the board and wrote names of people getting offers, I wasn't one of them. Not that I expected to be, considering I wasn't in the sports festival, let alone the school at all back then. 

However, I did notice a small inconsistency in the order of the most offers. I was pretty sure that boom boom had gotten first place in the festival, him being there is what convinced me to transfer, but his name was actually second on the board. 

Todoroki had taken the place of first as far as offers were concerned. Todoroki the nice boy who I used to meet when I snuck away from my fucking prison cell. Call me privileged for complaining about living in a mansion All my life, but I much prefer being here. With common folk. They ground me. 

I peeked up from my phone at the red and white head of hair in front of me, he didn't seem all that fazed. Although maybe it was just the lack of seeing his face that made me believe he couldn't care less about all but one of those offers. Still, his business is his, and my business is the new Ao3 update on my favorite chrollo lucilfer fanfiction. What a babe. 

I decided that the class as of right now would be of no importance to me, considering I will have no offers, and bakugou-the reason I came here- hates me like I'm a piece of gum stuck under his shoe.  Through that conclusion I allowed myself to dissolve into the world of hxh and forget about how boring this world is. 

Could my power beat Killua or go in a fight? I mean, it doesn't enhance my strength like they did trying to get into Killua's house so physically they must be stronger. 

"Y/n! Is there something you would like to share with the class?"

Mr.Aizawas voice seemed almost shot at me as my gaze rose from my phone in my lap to meet him at the front of the room. He looked displeased to say the least. Well good for him, im displeased too, I might not be able to beat a fucking twelve year old in combat. 

"Huh?"

"You were grumbling, what's so important you had to tell us, hm?"

I thought it through for a second- just kidding, I never think anything through. 

"Oh, well I wasn't sure if I could beat Gon in a fight, but I'm not coming to the realization that if Chrollo is my boyfriend, I shouldn't have to fight anyone at all. I can just be a pretty face in the backgrounds and then after he wins for me i'll suck his-"

"Enough, y/n." Mr.Aizawa no longer held a tired looking face, his eyes were wide and an uncomfortable cringed was set on his face. As I peered at the rest of the class many also had shocked eyes, but unlike our teacher, held faint blushes. 

Minus midoriya, his face was completely red and his eyes void of life. I must've killed him, huh. 

"Wait!"

In an attempt to regain some dignity, I tried to correct myself.

"I would....not suck his-?"

"Don't even say it, shitty princess !"

"Woah bakugou, you spoke to me on purpose!?"

"Shut up!"

"Hey, how come you call me princess, you like me or something?"

He growled at that, neither of us paying mind to the fact that everyone in the class was either dead from nosebleeds or extremely uncomfortable and staring at us.  

"Its cuz you act fucking entitled like a princess"

"I'll be your pillow princes-"

"Enough!" A robotic-like hand sliced the air in front of me. The voice sounded firm, almost more teacher-like than our teacher's voice. I followed my gaze up the hand, not failing to notice how as I drew up the guy's arm his muscles only seemed to get bigger and bigger and- iida? 

"Oh class rep-"

"Y/n this vulgar language and border-line harassment needs to cease immediately. I will not tolerante overtly sexual language and acts in this class-"

As he was speaking I noticed something ironic about the situation. If everyone here didn't like sexual jokes or banter, how were they so flustered at comments that objectively should be unknown to them. 

"How did you know what I meant, iida?" I rasped in a low sultry voice, allowing my fingers to dance up his arm starting at the wrist in front of my face. 

I heard a few chuckles from, who I would say are the only two people enjoying this situation: kaminari and...stinky mineta. Iida's face grew more red than previously and the arms in front of me began shaking. 

"Mr.Aizawa it seems I've disarmed the robot. Is there a restart button or something?" I question with a serious face using the search as an excuse to wonder my eyes all over his body. Perverted? Yes. Rightfully attracted to this giant hunk of a nerd. Yes ×10. 

"No, there is not." Todoroki, who was in front of me, finally turned around to address me. I guess he was unfazed by my words. Looks like someone here can be cool. Whether he is okay because he is more comfortable with sexual jokes, or because he has yet to pick up on them, its nice that somebody in here can still function. Otherwise, I'd feel like a nuisance. 

"Y/n I'm not really sure how to- let's just say to have detention with your m- midnight. Detention. Yeah." Aizawa publicly convinced himself of my punishment? 

"Okay"

"Now, back to this, even if you didn't get any offers ALL of you will have an internship" 

And so went on the class, kids chose their hero names, not me though. I wasn't even sure I wanted to be a hero at all, this was just a little less boring and sad than the way I lived before. This school had people who laughed in joy, not just to mask the pain. That was the real benefit, not being a hero, or being strong. Likely no one here realized that there were many places where none of this joy was possible. 

Some of the kids in class gave me suggestions for a hero name, but I didn't like them anyway. They lacked personality, and while I have many adjectives to describe my personality, my life, none of them are all that heroic. 

"Dark element"

"Girl who will die if her quirk doesnt like its environment" 

See, I'm not the best at this. Even bakugan names had some sense to it...well no. I'd say we're about the same, but still. Ugh. 

~timeskip~ 

Bakugou pov 😠

She came up with no hero names. Fucking entitled brat. Everyone at this lunch table seems to have no problem with the fact that she is here, just happy to have another pair of tits to stare at like perverts. Their gross. I bet she doesn't even want to be a hero, she sure as hell doesn't act like it. We don't even know what her whole quirk is. Ive seen her do that plant shit a couple times, fucking with flowers or whatever. Still, there's more to it. Something we don't know, at least. Cuz in the middle of class she gets up and whispers to Aizawa and he just lets her go. Where the fuck does she go? 

Interrupts class, got into the school because her moms a teacher, won't use her quirk. What a nuisance, I can't believe she is not expelled yet. Plus those bullshit sex jokes are so shitty. She is obviously faking something when she does them. Not like midnight, who always at least seems like she means that gross shit. 

"Hey, who did you guys choose for your internship? I haven't chosen yet."

"The number three hero guy," I spoke, knowing I'm the only person here who already chose. 

"Really? Best jeanist! That's so cool, but are you sure that for you bakugou?" Shitty hair raised a shitty brow at me. 

"What the hell is that supposed to mean!?"

"Just that he seems pretty...uptight..for you?" Dunceface added, but he spoke like it was a question. Of course he is the hero for me, he is the highest ranting hero on my list. If I wanna be number one, I gotta train with the best. 

If I go to his agency I'm sure there will be a lot more action, since he is so high ranking. Then i'll get some real experience kicking villain ass, well, other than the USJ. 

"Of course he is the right option!"

"Woahhh~"

Shit. It's her voice. I honestly should applaud her for using it less often around me but, how can one small girl be so goddamn annoying. I don't even know what she has to say and I already wish she would just put a sock in it. How can someone so entitled like her, probably never had to lift a finger, walk  over here and talk like she has something to say. 

"You're working with the best jeanist! So cool, one time he saved me from a group of rapist guys, it was awesome with all these strings everywhere and I could only see half of his face. Oh and he had goofy hair too!"

Oh. I didn't really know how to respond to the girl who looked so excited about almost being violated. Another thing wrong with her? I looked back at the other people at the table to see if they knew how to respond to something like that. 

Dunceface was frozen, tape arms were frozen, shitty hair was frozen, and alíen eyes were looking like a lost puppy and trying not to cry. 

It didnt seem like the shutty princess was exactly understanding how what she just yelled was making things weird. She just stood there expectantly. She kinda looked like she thought being raped was something that must happen to everyone. Did she think that? Wouldn't put it past her weird ass. 

"Uhm...anyways, i'm sure you'll do awesome, he likes to put boys in tight jeans. Wish I could intern too, I'd love to see that boom boom~" she winked. 

A perverted joke...and then she had the audacity to wink at me. 

"You wish you could see me in tight jeans, shitty extra!"

"I know...thats what a I just said." She dead panned, blinking a couple times at me. 

"Tch, screw you!"

"I would-" 

"Can it, i don't wanna hear your shitty voice anymore"

The girl stopped herself after my words, pushing all her hair behind her head, except for the two blond stands in the front. 

(You don't have to acknowledge these if you don't want, but I made it so that they change color depending on what element your using and I thought it was hot*if you have short hair, then you just got a lil nishinoya type thing 🥰)

Lifted her obnoxious hands that moved around while she talked and made a zipper-like motion over her lips. Then she just stood there looking at me. I really wanted to just let her stand there and go back to eating. Ignore her completely and let her hope fizzle out and die or something like that. 

Yet here I am, still looking at her. Silently. Wishing she made a stupid joke so that I could stop flickering between those images I'd seen of her dancing. How even though ballet is a princess fucking dance, the pictures felt nice. Like if I was watching it live I would probably be unable to criticize it. That pissed me off, because I want to hate everything about her, but I can't hate those photos. Where she looks like she is flying, without any need for a quirk.

I see her in that weird gown, and now, in the UA uniform. I see her looking respectable, formal, and serious. Then I see her stupid little smirk as she takes pride in being able to shut up for more than a minute. 

"Why are you still standing there?"

Instead of answering, she took her hand up again, made a pinch with her fingers and unzipped her mouth. 

"I was enjoying the look in your eyes."she smiled. 

The look in my eyes? Could she tell I was seeing two different people? What the hell does that even mean? Even said it without that shitty flirt voice. Like she meant it. 

"You tryna make fun of me?"I stood up from the table to get in her face.

"Not right now, maybe later, I gotta do something." She smiled sincerely at me, for a second as she walked away, I forgot about how this conversation started. What a wierd fucking girl. I'll never respect her as a hero. Tch. (Yes, its canon he tchs even in his thoughts) 

3rd person POV 

Y/n briskly walked out of the cafeteria with a new goal in mind. She would come to remember how maybe being oblivious was a benefit in some ways, but for now, she had a clear plan .

"Mr.Aizawa, let me do an internship."

"You weren't in the festival, I can't just hand you to a hero who has no idea what you can do, y/n."

"Well, you know what I can do, right?"

"No. I'm not doing internships. Stop asking."

"That's not what I meant! You can just tell them, or I could, it's not that hard to explain. Just say i'm all- powerful or some play on words like 'she's got all the right elements' hehe, see how i mimicked your voice there?" Y/n grinned like a child. She was proud of herself. 

"No. Still not happening."

"I wanna be an intern too, you raggedy ann looking ass hoe" 

"Y/n, it doesn't make sense, insulting me to get what you want?"

"Maybe it doesn't, but I bet you feel real insecure about your hair right now."

"You already have detention, what more do you want!"

"An internship, I wanna do one with kamui Woods, I have a good reason, too. As far as my quirk control, i'm the weakest with earth, the aspect that allows me to grow and manipulate plants and stuff. That's why I've only been using that part of it all month. Im trying to get her up to speed so I can start using all four at once. He is like a tres guy, right? He manipulates earth all day long. He could teach me a lot, and that aspect of my quirk would suit his well. Please!?!?!?"

If the girl had just asked again in a normal way, his answer would have been the same. However Aizawa was taken aback to hear how much thought she put into this. From the stories of the teachers lounge, he came to understand her big life goal, was to rely fully on a rich man or woman, and do nothing at all forever. Just to try and forget about the terrible life she was destined to have because of that quirk.

This side of her was something he could not even her mother had seen, and it prompted him to speak those words she wanted to hear so badly.

"Fine."