#just think humans have a tendency to leap before they look and... I'd like to spend more time really trying to weigh what might be lost
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
You know... any time I see stuff about how there's a big solar project in the desert I'm just left thinking... you know that's an actual biosphere even if it's not a place we do farming or whatever... like... have you actually considered the environmental impacts or did you just plop it in the middle of a place you decided was barren and empty?
#and like I'm pro solar... though I do think we have to consider what it takes to get the metals for our electronic components#like in everything; it's an issue we need to be considering because like cobalt's great and all... but...#anyway; I'm for solar mining for metals stuff aside; but I worry that people don't consider the impacts when they do stuff like this#like... just cause it's a 'green' energy doesn't mean it won't have a negative impact on anything#not saying don't do solar; not saying don't do wind; saying make sure you really do your due diligence#hope you get my point here#I just... kinda don't like the idea of 'undeveloped areas' in general cause it's like... is that actually what it really is?#sometimes we need to build new things; but you gotta compare the costs and benefits of it#I don't know... just seeing a video on my youtube feed about how China is making an awesome solar farm in the desert#and I'm thinking about like... didn't they make one in like Nevada or something where it basically killed all the life under it?#like oopsie... turns out there is actually life in the desert#and like... the thumbnail and the name of the video implies this is on some massive scale#and like... you're forgive me if I'm not trusting this to actually be environmentally friendly instead of just an attempt to fix the grid#just think humans have a tendency to leap before they look and... I'd like to spend more time really trying to weigh what might be lost
0 notes
Note
once again comin in with another meal to cook !!!
character of your choice âĄ
stalker, obsessive and possessive reader (quite literally just yandere) seeing their SoulmateTM one day and just going full degenerate and doing everything in their power to learn more of their new lover, even getting rid of powerful foes or imaginary rival love interests for them. no one has any idea as to how they're able to do things no human or gifted can do. eventually, reader slowly comes in and orchestrates their first meeting and slowly woos their lover, but they have major issues on hiding their possessiveness and jealousy of others. lover can either a) be all for it and find it hot or b) lover is unsettled by it.
either way, after someone flirts with their lover, reader kind of snaps and after that person leaves, reader excuses themself and goes to absolutely maim the persom who dared to approach what was his. it's nighttime when reader is finished with them, and they come home to their lover who is worried, but becomes horrified at seeing all the blood covering reader. all reader can think about is claiming his lover, breeding him and imprinting himself so deep inside his lover that they'll always feel empty without him. (dubcon would be amazing)
~ đ¸
Oh my god đ¸ď¸ bro đđđđđđđ
Bruv this is so good, love you for this, and yeah, y'all I've recently started reading a shit ton of dubcon/noncon so yeah...
I did this one for Akutagawa, cuz I feel like this could work for a situation where the reader is in the Port Mafia.
Also,this one got really long, and I haven't posted in like two days, so I thought I'd make two parts, yknow? Read Pt. 2 here!
Contents: Yandere reader that stalks Akutagawa and plans out their first time meeting in person. Not that Akutagawa already knows reader's name since they both work for the Port Mafia, but that's about it.
Warnings: No smut in this part yet, top male reader, yandere tendencies, mentions of stalking, murder, ability user reader.
You had been watching Akutagawa ever since you joined the Port Mafia. In total, this is what three years of stalking and careful planning was gonna boil down to: this one opportunity.
You had planned it out meticulously, paid seventy eight people to be nearby and on the scene to prevent anything from going wrong.
A heroic rescue!
As you watched Akutagawa cut open those men with Rashomon, you couldn't help but smile. He was so precious, so brave, so beautiful, so-
You shook your head, forcing yourself to concentrate. You couldn't miss your cue. Akutagawa wasn't stupid. If you made half a mistake, he'd know what was up.
One of the men got too close to Akutagawa for your liking, and you pounced on the opportunity like a starving cat.
You dashed out of your hiding spot, your ability leaping out and cutting the man to the ground.
Akutagawa turned to look at you, surprised.
Some of the men halted, too. They hadn't thought that you would actually hurt one of them. Before it was too apparent, and before Akutagawa could notice the changes in their expressions, your ability flew out, covering the entire area. Soon, all the men but the one you were enamored with were lying on the ground in pieces.
"[Name]," Akutagawa said, frowning slightly. "Aren't you supposed to be responsible for the East block tonight?"
"I asked Higuchi to handle it." You shrugged seemingly casually, your hands in your pockets as you scanned Akutagawa's body for any injuries. "The weather is great tonight, so I thought I'd step out for a drink. And good thing I did, otherwise you would have been cut to pieces."
Akutagawa sulked slightly, no longer focusing on the reason behind your sudden appearance. "I could've handled it."
Of course he could've, he's literally perfect.
"Were these Guild's men?" Akutagawa looked around the bloody mess of bodies around you two.
"How would I know?" You placed your hands behind your head.
Akutagawa shrugged. "Whatever, they're dead now."
And so the night ended. You took Akutagawa back to his home, pretending to ask for directions, when in reality you had his address memorized. He tried to turn you down, saying that you were being paranoid, but you said you'd rather be safe than sorry.
When you reached the tall apartment building, you watched him step inside, waiting for the light to turn on in the window you knew was his before leaving.
Over the next few weeks, you orchestrated multiple meetings between you two, always appearing out of nowhere and going back to it. Slowly, Akutagawa opened up, and started trusting you.
Miraculously, you even got Mori to assign you and Akutagwa to the same area. It cost you it's worth; you had to help Mori convince Elise into some bullshit.
It wasn't long before you were sure Akutagawa had developed feelings for you. He was painfully easy to read; his cheeks would flush every time you got too close, you could sometimes feel his eyes following you as you moved around. Once, when you 'casually' playfully winked at him, and you swore you could hear his breath hitch.
But you waited. The perfect thing to seal the deal for you and Akutagawa would be a confession from him, and not from you.
There were times when you almost gave up on this thought, like that one time one of your clients found interest in Akutagawa. He was ugly as hell and nowhere close to Akutagawa, who shone brighter than the sun. You had to take care of him your own way afterwards, slitting open his insides in your secret warehouse and throwing his pieces away to the dogs.
That wasn't a first-time occurrence, nor was it the last, but you fought well to keep your cool as long as Akutagawa was around. You didn't want him to know that side of you.
That day, you had known something was up even before you saw Akutagawa. There was a funny feeling in your stomach, and you felt like something great was going to happen.
And it did.
"I... I really l-like you."
His words caught you off guard, and for a moment you almost punched yourself in the face to confirm whether it was a dream or reality. But you stopped yourself.
"Really?" Even as you spoke, your hands were already reaching for Akutagawa, pulling him closer to you.
He nodded, his entire face red.
A small broke through your face, and you kissed him, holding his waist in your hands.
It was finally happening. It was finally happening! Three years, four months, twenty-seven days, sixteen hours and forty-two minutes after you'd first laid eyes on this angelic man, you had finally kissed him!
It was a gentle kiss, despite the roaring in your head and all the urges to crush him into yourself. You nipped at Akutagawa's lips gently, making his breath hitch in that oh-so majestic way. He tasted like the best thing in the world, and you just couldn't get enough.
It was him who pulled away first, you wouldn't willingly part from those beautiful lips even if you suffocated to death. Staring at you with shining eyes and a shy little smile on his ethereal face, Akutagawa spoke.
"So... D'you... wanna be my boyfriend?"
Yes, yes, YES! A thousand times yes!
You nodded, pressing your forehead against his.
#dom male reader#top male reader#dom reader#bsd x you#sub bsd x you#sub bsd#bungou stray dogs#sub bungou stray dog x you#sub bungou stray dogs#akutagawa x you#sub akutagawa x you
123 notes
¡
View notes
Text
Hi, Wonwoo | Jeon Wonwoo
â Wonwoo x fem!Reader
â word count: 7400~ words.
â slice of life // strangers to lovers // slow-paced romance
â inspired by: The Reason Why I Thought I'd Die - Mika Nakashima, and this was actually requested by anon ^^ also, The Only Exception by Paramore. Was listening to Chaeng's cover of it on youtube while i was working on this and i just realized it fits haha
â warning: some cursing, food, Wonwoo is v alone D:, that's about it i think? lmk if there's more.
A/N: hi, guys! been so long since i posted a long one? frankly, I've been working on this since somewhere during May and the plan was to finish it and post it on Wonwoo's birthday. but well, there was certain conditions that didnt allow me to write and...here we are ^^ honestly, I am not too sure about this fic because it's very... slice of life? i guess? there's nothing really exciting going on, i feel like. but anyway! i'm pretty happy w how this turns out and i hope you like it too.
The reason why I thought I'd die is because my shoelace got undone
And I'm not good at connecting things together, the same goes with human relationships
Wonwoo has gotten so many shits by engaging in human interactions that he completely believes thereâs really no one out there that he can lean on, let alone trust.
From his fucked-up parents, schoolmates who always said shit about him because of them, to teachers who did nothing to stop them, Wonwoo basically has no one in his side. He did, once, a friend who ended up betraying his trust for a show.
Wonwoo doesnât wish to think about him ever again.
After that, Wonwoo has decided once is enough. Thereâs no need to risk his trust once more only to be broken later on because itâs such a waste of his time and energy. It might seem like a big leap after meeting a bad friend once, but Wonwoo would rather not take a risk.
There are exactly 2 things in his life that Wonwooâs grateful for: being a part of broken family is rough, but Wonwooâs thankful at least heâs an only child so he can just leave once heâs old enough without having to worry about a sibling that he has to take on.
Next, heâs also grateful that he knows better than to follow the steps of his alcoholic father nor his mother whoâs practically a con. Despite seeing them and their shitty tendencies for about half of his life, Wonwooâs grateful his moral stays intact even though his faith in humanity doesnât.
Today, the list gets an addition after years of staying still.
Wonwooâs grateful that he finally has enough money to move from the basement he has resided for years since he ran away from homeâa very humble place that he was able to rent out of the little money he had managed to save up from working part time here and there once heâs in high school.
That said, Wonwooâs been living there for at least 6 years now; he couldnât afford a better place during university even though heâs earned a lot more than before because he had to pay for university stuffs despite his scholarship. Even so, Wonwoo doesnât look back once he finds a much better place with a fairly cheap rent even though itâs a little far off the city.
Anythingâs better than this hellhole that always reminds him of his pathetic life, than this place that brings back memories of his parents because theyâre the only reason heâs living in that basement to begin with.
Wonwoo lets out a scoff at the thought; living is such a big word. He does not live, Wonwoo just survivesânot live. But itâs okay because he doesnât see why he should get out of his way to live. Heâs just going to continue surviving until his body gives up, no catch whatsoever. Itâs a little empty, but he has decided itâs better than temporary happiness with future disappointment looming over him after some time.
Wonwoo looks up at the building in front of him with a full backpack and a medium carrier in tow, there arenât much stuffs to move because he doesnât have a lot to begin with. The only thing he has moved first prior to the final moving day is his blanket and two worn-out paddings because they would take a lot of space in his bag if he didnât move them first.
He walks up the stairs, because the building doesnât have an elevator and his place is just on the 5th floor. Heâd just consider this a work out and be done with it. Wonwoo doesnât have the luxury of complaining, after all.
âHello,â a soft voice calls to him when heâs looking through his backpack for his key.
Wonwoo wordlessly stares and assumes youâre his new neighbor, not that it matters. He has no plan on making friends or even acquaintances with anyone here. Why should he? You just happen to stay in the same building, thatâs it.
âAre you the new neighbor?â you ask again, still smiling despite Wonwooâs silence. So, he nods out of courtesy as he continues to rummage through his bag for his key. âI live two doors next to yours, donât hesitate to knock if you ever need help, okay?â
Another silence.
You leave after telling him your name, already knowing he wonât give yours. Once he comes in and settles on his mattress, Wonwoo wonders when was the last time someone has ever told him itâs nice to meet him.
Itâs been two weeks since Wonwoo moves to this building and he has caught you five more times since that first encounter. You never miss to greet him a âhiâ accompanied with a smile even though Wonwoo never answers back.
Wonwoo isnât sure what about your smile that always makes his days a little more bearable.
The sixth time Wonwoo sees you, itâs because your knocking on his door wakes him up from his nap on a weekend.
âHi, Iâm sorry to bother you.â Your smile is a little different this time, he notices, a little embarrassed and hesitant compared to your sweet, confident smile you usually use to greet him. âBut⌠can you help me? My sink is leaking a little and Iâm not sure how to fix it. I usually ask Mr. Kim down the hall but heâs out of town and, uh, yeah.â
Wonwoo still doesnât say anything, but heâs not an asshole and the old basement heâs used to live in has taught him how to fix leaking sinks more than he wouldâve liked. So, he just silently walks away to get some tools he thinks heâd need and then puts on his shoes before he wordlessly stands in front of you, giving you a silent sign that heâs going to help.
Thereâs no loss in helping someone whoâs genuinely smiled at him more than anyone ever does.
You just kind of fidget as he goes to fix the leak on your sink, but Wonwoo realizes itâs not the same uncomfortable way people usually do in his presence. Youâre just a little awkward and somewhat unsure; thereâs no sign of you feeling uncomfortable.
When Wonwooâs done, he tries the sink a few more time to make sure the leaking has stopped and then nods at you once heâs sure all is good.
âThank you so much.â There goes your usual smile, Wonwoo notes to himself. âI⌠uhhâŚâ
He looks at you in question, wondering if there are other problems that need fixing.
âI⌠just finished cooking earlier and I think I made too much so, uhh, would you like to eat some? Or maybe take some with you? As a thank you and apology for bothering you?â
Wonwoo blinks, the corner of lips lifting in the slightest at the way youâre flustered for no reason at all. He immediately coughs to cover it, though, probably the most sound youâve ever heard from.
You seem to get that Wonwooâs about to reject, so you quickly turn away to get another plate and move some of the fried rice from your pan to the plate and hand it to him.
âJust⌠put the plate in front of my door when youâre done, okay?â you tell him.
When he gets back to his apartment, Wonwoo puts down the plate on the small table where he usually eats at. He simply stares at the fried rice in front of him, your smile and your words of gratitude ringing through his mind. As if on cue, his stomach starts to rumble out of hunger.
He sighs before he finally gives in to his hunger. Wonwoo doesnât want to owe anyone anything, but you did say this is your way of saying thank you because heâs helped fixing your sink. Heâll just take your kindness this one time and move on from it.
Why should he starve himself when thereâs a perfectly cooked meal in front of him?
Once heâs done with his food, it is only then that Wonwoo tries to remember when was the last time heâs eaten a homecooked meal.
He canât.
The next time he sees you, Wonwoo has just got back from his grocery shopping. Youâre looking at the box in front of you, biting your lip as you ponder silently to yourself. Wonwoo assumes youâre thinking about how to carry the big box in front of you full of baking supplies. He knows those weight a lot from a part time job he did once upon a time.
You turn to him when you realize someoneâs beside you. He thinks youâll say something about the heavy weight in front of you, maybe hint at him to help you with it. But you just let out a âHiâ with a smile before proceeding to pick it up yourself and walk with the heavy load with wobbling legs.
Wonwoo doesnât even realize heâs caught up with you, doesnât know what pushes him to tap your shoulder and holds out his arm to take the box from you.
You stare at him, confused, but Wonwoo simply takes it from you and hands you his much lighter grocery bag.
âOhâoh, thank you,â you say, and Wonwoo can tell you feel bad for making him do this. âI ordered these online and I forgot to think about carrying them upstairs.â
The walk up has been a bit awkward for you, but Wonwoo guesses itâs because you, much like any other people, feel the need to fill silence. He doesnât see the need to do so, heâs just going to consider this as an extra exercise and leave it there. Plus, you do live in the same floor, anyway.
And, if heâs being completely honest, he still feels the need to give you something back for making him eat a proper homecooked meal after so long.
âI can take it inside,â you smile again at him, the same sweet smile heâs already used to now. He wonders what makes you never stop smiling at him despite his consistency of never returning them. âThank youâŚâ
âWonwoo,â he says, surprising not only you but also himself.
You give him another smile, something close to a grin, a bigger one than before. âThank you, Wonwoo.â
Wonwoo has never heard someone say his name with so much gentleness until right now.
A few days later, he opens his door only to find a paper bag hung on his door knob from the outside. He opens it to find a plastic container with breads in it, a yellow post-it plastered on top.
Wonwoo doesnât.
Hi, Wonwoo!
Thank you for helping me the other day.
I purposely baked a lot so I can give you some ^^
Take this as a token of gratefulness?
You can give me back the container when youâre finished :D
p.s. I hope you like chocolate?
He doesnât like anything sweet in general.
Not until he eats the bread filled with chocolate later that afternoon during his lunch break and many more after that.
For whatever reason, you have made this a habit that Wonwoo isnât sure what to make of.
At least once a week youâd knock on his door and give him food, telling him you made too much once again. And twice a week, youâd leave the product of your baking on his door with different post-its on top of the container.
Itâs the most someone has taken care of him and he doesnât know what to do.
But he does know those post-its always lift the corner of his lips even a little and reading them becomes a therapeutic action he does everyday. He keeps them all neatly in his little notebook, gluing them with a tape. Heâd randomly open a page to see which one of your writing would greet him that day before he ready himself for bed.
All of your memo starts the same, with a âHi, Wonwoo!â and itâs kind of crazy that Wonwoo can imagine your smile and your voice everytime he reads them. He frowns as he wonders if you do this to other people, too.
Hi, Wonwoo!
This oneâs not chocolate but sugar :D
though I still donât know if you like chocolate?
anyway, I hope you enjoy these
bc theyre experimental ;;
He shakes himself at the thought.
What on earth did he let himself into?
The first time your smile doesnât comfort Wonwoo is when he finds you drenched from head to toe as he goes out to put his trash bag in front of his door so he doesnât forget to throw them away tomorrow.
Itâs been raining hard since earlier and your condition only proves that further. He accidentally catches your eyes, but you just forcefully smile at him as you pass by.
He sees your step halting as the thunder roars loudly anad you visibly flinch. From where heâs at, he can see the way your palms are balling into fists.
Before he knows it, heâs standing in front of you, not knowing what to say nor what to do. He can safely assume why your body reacts that way earlier and, if anything, the lightning that bursts through the night once again only proves his theory right when you step closer to him out of reflex.
âDo youâŚâ he hesitantly says, letting his body work first and think later. Maybe itâs the amount of time youâve shown genuine interest in him, or the way you treat him kindly without hoping anything in return. Whatever it is, seeing you like this tugs something within him. âShould I accompany you until the rain stops?â
You sniff slightly, both from the cold and your fear of thunder. âPlease?â
He quickly locks his door then follows you to your place. You tell him to sit down while you go wash up, your voice the smallest he has ever heard you speak. Youâve asked him to turn on the heater earlier, so he does exactly that before settling awkwardly on the sofa.
Why did he even offer to stay with you? What could he even do to comfort you?
Wonwoo groans from the inside, what does he even know about comfort? Didnât he promise himself heâs not going to waste his time engaging in this... human relationships ever again?
Sure, youâve been kind to him more than anyone ever hasâeven more than the guy Wonwoo used to call friend before, but that doesnât mean itâs a green light to let you into his life.
Who knows if youâre kind to everyone and heâs just one of many? Who knows if heâs just a charity case to you? His heart aches a little at the thought, but he figures if youâre really treating him like a charity case, at least youâre not using him for anything.
He sighs at the realization and rubs his face with his palms. What the fuck is wrong with him, thinking about a girl he barely knows just because sheâs been giving him food?
âIâm sorry to drag you into this,â your voice breaks his chain of thoughts, and Wonwoo automatically turns to where youâre at; your hair still wet from the shower and youâre wearing a long pajama pants with a sweater thatâs probably a size too big for you. âI just⌠I donât have a good relationship with thunder.â
Wonwoo simply nodsâbecause what else is he supposed to say? Is he supposed to ask why?
âIâll just⌠dry my hair first,â you say again, opening the door next to the bathroom to get into your room.
Your place is more or less identical as his; the kitchen near the front door, and then next to it is the door to the bathroom, then thereâs another door that leads to the bedroom. Other than your room, Wonwoo can see everything from where heâs sitting at in the supposedly living room.
He hears the faint sound of hairdryer, wondering once again what is he doing here. If he thinks about it, it is really pretentious of him to ask if you want his company. He has never even really spoken to you before this, only nods of acknowledgements and a few âthank youâ on the rare days that you catch him putting the paper bag with your plastic container in it on your doorknob.
But thereâs just something about your defeated smile earlier that pulls the string of his heart; something that he hasnât felt in so long. Wonwoo doesnât think he has the right to pity others when his own life isnât grand to say the least. He barely even has his life togetherâonly getting by. Yet when he sees your state earlier, he canât help but feel like he wants to do something to help.
He snickers inwardly at the thought; he doesnât even have any plan to better his life and he wants to help you?What a joke.
âHi Wonwoo,â your usual greeting calls him, once again pulling him out of his thought. âThank you for offering to stay with me.â
âUm, yeah,â he exclaims dumbly. What the fuck is he supposed to say in this situation? He doesnât think thereâs ever a time in his life where heâs comforting other people, let alone having other people comfort him. Jeon Wonwoo has little to no reference whatsoever.
You seem to get it, though. Because you donât look annoyed, at least not to his eyes. For reasons that Wonwoo doesnât understand, you donât seem to be bothered by his inability to engage in a conversation; which is a first because everyone always gets annoyed and thatâs how he has managed to keep them out of his life.
But not you, apparently.
âIâm⌠Iâve always been scared of thunder,â you say again, breaking the silence. âIâm not even sure how I come into it, but they just scare me so much that Iâd always need someone with me during rainstorms.â
âUh,â he starts hesitantly after he clears his throat. âWhat⌠do you usually do about it?â
You seem like youâre hesitant to tell him, so Wonwoo stays silent and hope you get that he doesnât mind if you donât want to tell him. âI try to distract myself. But as long as thereâs someone beside me, itâs enough comfort even if the fear is still there. So, thank you, really. You being here is already comforting me.â
His throat tightens at your words, Wonwooâs been called a lot of names before, has been told a lot of things to the point where heâs immune to insults from years of receiving them unprovoked. But no one has ever told him heâs their comfort and he has never expected to be called as such, too.
Even right now, Wonwooâs doing nothing but sit beside you in silence. It doesnât make sense that youâre thanking him for comforting you.
âI know you probably think you havenât done anything,â you say as if you can read his mind. âBut trust me when I say your presence brings comfort to me more than youâd imagine.â
Wonwoo doesnât trust you, but he pretends to nod in understanding because thereâs a gentle smile in your face as you look at him in the eyes.
The rain is still falling hard outside and he can still feel the chilly air despite the heater, and yet, Wonwoo feels warm inside.
No one ever smiles at him as warmly as you do.
When Wonwoo comes to, itâs morning and the rain hasnât stoppedâtheyâre just drizzle, though, making the atmosphere a little cold but pleasingly so. He cracks his neck a little, his back also hurting from sleeping while sitting down. Did he fall asleep on the sofa?
âGood morning?â a voice calls to him from the side. âIâm sorry for making you stay the night. But thank you for staying with me.â
Wonwoo turns to the voice and finds you looking at him with a hesitant smile and⌠is that a hint of red your cheeks? He rubs the sleep away from his eyes, he mustâve just imagined it.
He stands up, figuring itâs okay now and he can go back to his place. Thank God itâs weekend.
âWouldâŚâ you stop him from walking to the door. âWould it be okay if you stay and have breakfast with me? Iâve made some already.â
Wonwoo glances at the plates on the table, a stack of pancakes visible from where heâs at. Wonwoo is a pretty simple man, he does what he likes and not do what he doesnât like. Right now, he doesnât like the way youâre fidgeting, as if afraid heâll say no.
So Wonwoo nods and sits down next to you on the small dining table. Heâs surprised to find himself answering your questions about his job and whatnots, small talks that he usually avoids but now doesnât have the heart to because you donât seem like youâre asking just for the sake of it.
Heâs also surprised to find himself enjoying this time he shares with you. Heâs found out that you work in a bakery, hence why you often bake and give him some because he âlooks like someone whoâll appreciate itâ. Heâs also found that youâre bad at eating spicy food despite liking them with all your heart, that you play with your thumbs when youâre nervous, and that your lips jut forward when youâre too deep in thought.
It all happens so naturally to the point where he doesnât even realize itâs a routine for you to knock on his door and bring food to have dinner in his place and for him to go look for you when the rain starts falling a little too hard.
He doesnât realize that his gaze often stays a few seconds too long when looking at you, that his skin tingles everytime youâre close to him, that he has started to mirror your smile everytime you give him one.
âWhy do you not smile?â youâve asked one day after eating with him a few more times, assuming youâre now close enough not to offend him.
Wonwoo shrugs, stirring the instant noodle in front of him. âJust not used to it, I guess.â
By now, youâve probably sensed he is all by himself, that he doesnât have anyone with him and thereâs a reason why he was skeptical about letting you in at the beginning. Thankfully, you never ask about it and never bring it up. Wonwooâd like to think itâs your way of accepting that part of him.
You frown at his answer, unsure how to reply to that. âWell, get used to it.â
âWhy?â
âBecause I want to see you smile?â
Your words make his heart skips a beat, a feeling that heâs very unfamiliar with, but Wonwoo brushes it away and chooses not to dwell on it. He forces his lips to go up even though his eyes are blank, and you laugh at his forced smile. âNot like that!â
âThatâs the best I can do.â He shrugs again nonchalantly before he digs in to his bowl. Youâve stayed silent at that, and when Wonwoo looks up at you again, youâre staring at him with something close to determination. âWhat?â
âIâll make it my mission to make you smile,â you say very seriously, crossing your arms in front of your chest as if to make a point that youâre not playing around. âMaybe even laugh.â
Wonwoo lets out an incredulous scoff at that, not believing youâd take it so seriously. Itâs not one that makes you feel bad, though, just enough to let you know heâs amused.
âOh?â you exclaim with an excited grin. âSee? Thatâs close to a smile already. I will succeed, Iâm telling you.â
And you do, barely two weeks later, because how can he not smile when you profusely apologize to the point where youâre close to tears for falling into him on the stairs?
Youâve been too deep in your thoughts that you miss a step and, when you realize whatâs happening, itâs way too late to catch your balance. Thankfully, Wonwooâs on the right place in the right time, having just come in from work when he catches you blankly going down the stairs.
Heâs just watched, wondering if he can catch your attention without doing anything. But when he notices your foot misses its hold, heâs quick to catch you in his embrace so heâd take the fall (though thatâs exaggerating because heâs able to catch his balance with you in his arms). It has taken you a few seconds to realize whatâs happened, hastily pulling away from him with panic as you make sure heâs fine.
You apologize over and over again, almost crying that Wonwoo has to calm you down and tell you all is fine. And he really is fine, because itâs not like he falls down, he just braces your weight and he manages not to fall backwards doing so.
Whatâs not fine, though, is the way heâs started to crave being in your proximity. It takes you almost falling down the stairs that he has no choice but pull you into his arms to realize he doesnât simply enjoy your friendship. It only takes him that few seconds of closeness to keep him up at night, wondering how it feels to have you close to him everyday and night.
After that, youâve started to use it as an excuse to eat with him practically everyday except for the days where he works late or youâre too tired from work. Youâve told him itâs your way of easing your guilt and you honestly say it gets lonely to eat by yourself now that you know Wonwooâs just a few doors away, ready to accompany you.
He doesnât say it, but he feels the loneliness too now if heâs eating by himself. And thatâs not something that Wonwoo knows how to handle because heâs always been alone but never lonely. Heâs always thought heâs content with himself, that heâs sick of other people and does not want to risk them wasting his time ever again. But now that he has you with him, he realizes that he never feels lonely because these people never really matter to him, hence the lack of affection or even emotion.
But you do. You matter too much and Wonwoo doesnât know what heâd do if you suddenly walk out of his life like the handful figures in his life always do.
For the first time in his life, Wonwoo finds himself hoping someone would stay in his life.
âWonwoo?â you call hesitantly as the guy stares off into space. âWonwoo, are you okay?â
Heâs been ignoring you for quite some time now and, even though you know Wonwoo tends to be quiet, you can tell this isnât his usual silence. Heâs agitated, his body is somewhat tense and his eyes are a little unfocused.
Since the moment you knock on his door to ask if you should order pizza because youâre not in the mood to cook, Wonwooâs been a little off. You immediately ask if heâd like to be alone, because you know despite the way youâve managed to close the gap between you and him, Wonwooâs not there yet when it comes to talking about his feelings.
But Wonwoo has shaken his head and then proceeds to tell you that he, in fact, doesnât want to be alone. Thatâs probably the most he has ever bared his feelings to you.
So, you stay.
Even though you might not understand completely and he might not even tell you whatâs going on, you stay there just like the way he did before on that fateful night when the rain refused to stop and the thunder kept on striking.
You look at him worriedly, something that he misses because heâs too deep in his thought.
âShould we go outside?â you propose out of nowhere. âGet some snacks then walk around Han River or just the park nearby?â
Wonwoo looks at you with something that is close to confusion, which is something that heâs already used to by now because you often make him do things he never thought he would. The only reason he follows them through is because itâs you.
âItâs a beautiful night,â you shrug, your eyes go to the window as if to make a point and he follows your sight. âAnd weâve never gone out, have we? Letâs go outside.â
Thirty minutes later, youâre sitting on a park nearby, sipping canned beers because Han River is actually too far away and youâre just sprouting it to convince Wonwoo to go outside. He hasnât told you whatâs happened, but you happily accept his silence as you whine about work in hope it will distract him even a little.
Wonwoo looks at you from the side, finally smiling a little because he can see what youâre trying to do now. No one has ever cared enough to do this to him before, and itâs not like he has ever let anyone get close enough to do this for him. His heart warms at the way youâre animatedly talking about some of your regulars at the bakery.
âI saw my father today,â he blurts out at last, and he can feel your surprised stare from the side even though heâs looking forward, gaze lost in the empty park. âHe⌠came to my work place, though I donât know how he found out where I work. Made a scene and asked for money.â
The tight smile in his face is one that youâve never seen before, one that tells heâs in disbelief and heâs not the least bit amused. âThe security actually had to call the police because he refused to leave.â
You reach for his shoulder, your thumb caressing the skin there through his hoodie in hope it will calm him down a little. âHow are you feeling?â
Wonwoo looks down on his hands, all sorts of thoughts going through his mind. Heâs always thought heâs indifferent regarding his parents, which is why he immediately left the house once heâs of legal age and saved enough money. Heâs always thought he doesnât have any sentiment towards them for him to hate them, he just wants to leave and be done with it.
But today has proved him wrong. Heâs not sure if itâs the years he has spent not seeing his parents, or if itâs nothing but a shock reaction, but the sight of his father has brought him into distraught. What if he appears again? What if his dad shows up here and you realize you donât want to be associated with someone like Wonwoo who has a lot of baggage behind him?
âI⌠donât know,â Wonwoo answers truthfully, a sigh passes through his lips.
Jeon Wonwoo has never been good with emotions, mainly because heâs used to the void inside his heart and heâs unfamiliar with the concept of feelingâŚpractically anything. The few stuffs that heâs familiar with are maybe annoyance, because his co-worker is nowhere near competent, thus Wonwoo ends up taking his share of works because their tasks are eventually linked to one another; or maybe frustration, because sometimes he just wants to go home quick and eat dinner with you but the meeting drags on.
And maybe⌠the tingling inside his chest everytime you smile up at him, or the way his inside churns everytime your finger brushes his.
âMmm, let me rephrase that, then,â you say, your feet swinging slightly. âHow did you feel when he showed up?â
âMostly annoyed,â he says after a while, looking back down at you. âAnd then a little disoriented, because even though Iâve always known heâs a shitty person, Iâd never thought heâd go out of his way to find me just to ask for money.â
You simply hum at his answer, still swinging your legs back and forth as you contemplate. Wonwoo takes this time to look at you carefully, heâs close enough to count the number of eyelashes if he wants, close enough to finally notice thereâs a tiny mole near your lips.
Close enough to wonder what it would be like if your lips are against his.
âAre you not mad?â you cut off his thought with a question instead, and Wonwoo can feel his neck getting warm from embarrassment as if youâve caught what heâs thinking. He takes a glance of your lips one more time before looking away, a second too long that he hopes you donât notice.
Wonwooâs silent for a while before he answers. This is the moment, he realizes. Wonwoo never talks about his family to you because he knows most people say stuffs like families are important, that blood relations are the strongest of them all, and that no matter what, family is family.
He thinks itâs utter bullshit to let people walk all over you just because youâre blood related; but heâs seen the way you fondly talk about your family though it isnât often. He notices the gleam in your eyes and your happy grin when you say your brother is stupid because he randomly sends you meme with no context whatsoever, notices the way you replay videos of your niece whoâs learning how to talk over and over again.
In short, you love your family with all your heart while his is not even functional in the tiniest bit. There would be differences in the way you and him see family, and Wonwooâs afraid it would affect the relatâwhateverâs going on between the two of you. He doesnât want to ruin it; doesnât want to lose you over something like thisâor anything, for that matter.
A difference in principles isnât as easily settled as difference in opinions. Wonwoo has never talked about his family not only because he doesnât care about them enough to talk about them.; he has never talked about them because he doesnât want to risk losing you.
âNot really⌠no,â he finally manages to let out. Heâd have to face this hurdle sooner or later, might as well do it now while youâve brought up the topic. âI⌠donât care enough about my parents to be angry. For me, what happened was just some sort of a nuisance. But I guess itâs been long since I actually saw him and I was just kind of⌠distraught.â
Wonwoo braces himself for the family advices, readies himself for disappointment because thereâs just no way someone as family-oriented as you are would get what heâs saying.
But you look up to him instead, pondering about something silently before you scoot closer and gently lays your head in his shoulder. Wonwoo tenses a little at the gesture, but doesnât take long to relax once you put one of your hands on his arm and stroke the material of his hoodie in hope heâd let go of the tension.
He wonders if youâre trying to calm him down before dropping the bomb.
âI donât love my family because theyâre my family, you know?â you say carefully, and you can feel Wonwoo trying to take a look at your face in surprise. âI love my family because theyâre good people, because they take care of me and I can tell they love me even though they annoy me sometimes.â
Wonwoo shifts a little in his seat, making you lean a little closer with the top of your head brushing the side of his neck.
He likes this. He likes this a lot.
âSo, even though IâŚhave never experienced it myself, I kind of get where youâre coming,â you continue. âI wouldnât want to be with my family too if they didnât treat me well. I get that youâre not giving them a free pass to walk over you just because theyâre your familyâyour own parents at that, and I think⌠I think youâre so strong to be able to do that.â
This time, Wonwoo actually pulls away to see you with his own eyes; to see if youâre just saying it to comfort him even though he knows youâre not that kind of person. You let him be, staring back into his eyes as he searches your face.
When youâre certain Wonwooâs not going to answer immediately, you dare yourself to reach up your hand and cup his cheek. He flinches a little, not used to the feeling of something so delicate against his skin. He wills himself to stay still, holds back the desire to close his eyes and lean in to your touch.
âYouâve⌠worked really hard, you know that, right?â you start again, this time without concealing your gaze elsewhere as you will yourself to keep on meeting his eyes. âI can only imagine how hard it must be for you; how lonely, too.â
Heâs not really sure what prompts the stinging feeling in his eyes, not sure why his throat tightens and he tries his best to blink back the tears.
âI hate to imagine the amount of time youâve spent by yourself, Woo.â His heart clenches a little at the nickname, one that slips out from time to time. There were times when he wanted to ask why do you call him Wonwoo sometimes and Woo at others, but he quickly set the question aside just in case itâd make you stop calling him that.
âAnd I know youâre used to itâthat youâre⌠fine being alone. But I also know it was a rough way to get there. And even though Iâm not aware how it came to that, Iâm sure you mustâve been so strong to be able to get here by yourself. Itâs not an easy feat, Woo. Not everyone can go through whatever you did all alone.â
Wonwoo takes a deep breath, somehow able to blink back the tears even though the knot in his throat is still there. He might not have a lot of experiences with people, but he knows what to expect when this type of topic is brought up. But, of course, youâre you and Wonwoo shouldâve known youâd once again prove that youâre never what he expects you to be.
He has expected you telling him to try and talk his father; that heâs still family, after all. He has expected you to tell him to try to open up, that his tendency to keep to himself isnât good for himself and he needs to go out more.
But this? It has never crossed his mind that anyone would say heâs strongÂ. Maybe pitiful, assumptions of his life being tragic and miserable when people somehow find out heâs alone with no family or friends.
âThank you,â you whisper through the silence enveloping the both of you, Wonwoo much too overwhelmed to reply.
âFor what?â he whispers back, now letting himself bask in the feeling of your palm against his cheek.
âFor hanging in there and making it here,â you smile softly, your thumb caresses the apple of his cheek. For a moment there, Wonwoo is convinced all the stars in the night sky are reflected in your eyes. Thereâs absolutely no way that someoneâyou are looking at him like heâs the only thing that matters in the whole world, as if heâs someone to be treasured with everything that youâve got. His mind must be playing tricks on him, what does he know about the way someone looks at another? âFor coming into my life.â
In his whole life, Wonwoo firmly believes he was just one of those outcasted people meant to live his life alone. He has never expected anyone to come by and make his life better, has never tried to find that someone either. He has accepted that he���s going to live his life that way because what else could he do, anyway?
But of course, you happen. You step into his life and slowly turn the gears the other way, not to change his way of livingâsurvivingto fit yours but to teach him how to live even a little. A change just enough to let him know that there is happiness he can find in little things like your smile, or your breads, or the dinner you share together even when you barely share words because you both are too tired.
That his life does not have to be so dim, after all, and he doesnât need to achieve something big to be happy.
Wonwoo never aims for happiness; sometimes he laughs at the occasion TV shows he happens to catch on boring days, sometimes heâd smile at the stray cats he sees on the side of the street as he pats them softly on the head, sometimes heâd be amused at the words from the book heâs currently reading. Thatâs about his relationship with happiness before. He hasnât expected to be happy and heâs never sought it himself.
Obviously, that, too, changes once youâve made your way in. Wonwoo often finds himself smiling at the thought of you, often opens his notebook full of your post-its to cheer him up during particularly bad nights, often waits for you to knock on his door and ask him to eat dinner together.
Most importantly, Wonwoo often stares at your selfie in his phone that you have taken as a joke through his locked lock screen. He figures you mustâve thought heâd delete it immediately once heâs found the picture. But he also figures youâd have no way of knowing he still keeps that picture in his phone and finds himself smiling when he opens his gallery justto take a look at your smile during random times.
âCan I kiss you?â he asks instead, his voice so deep and so smallâbarely even a whisper.
The words startle not only you but Wonwoo himself. For a second there, he wonders where did the courage come from. But, then again, it has been a very emotional night for him. Heâs overwhelmed with all sorts of feelings and this is probably the most Wonwoo ever has to deal with them.
Thus, heâs probably not right in the head.
But you give him a small nod and, before he knows it, heâs already leaning forward to meet your lips. Wonwoo has never felt so warm inside, has never thought it was possible to feel content to this extendâor at all. But thatâs what heâs feeling right now and, as if heâs not dysfunctional enough already, he can feel the circuits of his brain going out when your fingers move from his cheek to the side of his neck, and finally settling on his shoulders after trailing fire down his skin in the most pleasant way imaginable.
The kiss feels both so quick and so long; his arms have somehow wounded themselves around your waist and when you pull apart, you immediately dive into his neck to hide your embarrassment just so you can avoid his inspecting eyes. Unexpectedly, the sound of his laughter rings through the empty park and you softly hit his chest even though you can feel that Wonwooâs neck also getting warm from embarrassment.
âDonât laugh!â you mumble in his hold, your voice muffled by the material of his hoodie.
âDidnât you say it was your mission to make me laugh?â he jokingly reminds you, and then winces a little when you pinch him by the waist to shut him up.
He wants to say that itâs him that should thank you; that itâs him who should be thanking you for coming into his life despite his initial skepticism, for always smiling at him even though he didnât even return them back at first, for taking care of him with the gentlest heart.
For being you in his life.
But as much as heâs learned that itâs okay to express himself to you, itâs still not something he can voice just yet. So Wonwoo tightens his hold on you a little, and somehow you understand that itâs his way of telling you to look upâwhich you immediately do.
Wonwoo drops another gentle kiss on your lips once your eyes meet his, hoping youâd get everything heâs trying to say and that heâll try his best to start voicing his feelings towards you. Heâd like to think the way you smile into the kiss is your way of saying that you understand.
That youâll wait until he gets there.
Thereâs a shy smile on your face when he opens his eyes again, your lips and his still brushing in the faintest.
Wonwoo is grateful he has you in his life.
The reason why I thought I'd die is because I hadn't met you yet.
And if people like you can exist in this world, then maybe I like it a little after all.
And if people like you are living in this world, then maybe itâs alright to hope a little too.
#wonwoo scenarios#wonwoo oneshot#wonwoo au#seventeen scenarios#seventeen imagines#seventeen fanfic#seventeen scenario#wonwoo imagines#wonwoo fluff#wonwoo fic#svt fic#svt imagines#seventeen fic#seventeen imagine#wonwoo imagine#wonwoo scenario#seventeen fluff#ww!req#wonwoo angst#seventeen angst
1K notes
¡
View notes