#just kick roman's ass and hey maybe he'll also come to his senses

[samijey]

Sami stays hitting the Usos with some harsh truths and Jey stays struggling someone save this poor man

bonus:

[tyedyebaby]

my opinion on the 4/23 smackdown

meant to do this a lot earlier but yknow. Stupidity is Rampant where I am involved. also btw I watched the episode but I have a bad memory so I'm getting most of my info from an article im linking at the end

anyway!!

the beginning

if I remember correctly, cesaro was about to cut a promo but then seth interrupted him and cut a promo and they argue just a little and then jey interrupted both of them and cut a maybe promo and seth and jey team up and start circling cesaro and it looked badass and then daniel bryan interrupted him and cut a promo (basically owning seth and jey) and then ROMAN interrupted everyone and started bitching and then roman left and commercial break and boom tag match. after a match that lasts through two commercial breaks and 45 minutes with seth up and fucking leaving ¾ of the way through, daniel and cesaro win.

I love and hate this because a) it's the closest seth and roman have come to interacting in a damn while [to my knowledge anyway] and hey, daniel hyping cesaro is fucking great, and jey. jey!, b) it felt strange to have roman address everyone but seth because he literally verbally addressed everyone but seth. yeah seth was dealt a rain check but still I want WORDS man. CONVERSATION. it also strikes me as strange that seth left jey to the mercy of the face team because "I don't have time for this, I'm seth freakin' rollins" and he's AWOL for the rest of the show. dubious.

then theres a backstage segment with adam pearce, sonya deville, and apollo crews in which apollo complains about having to defend his title tonight (that's how wrestling works, genius). adam eventually reveals that apollos opponent is kevin owens, which, HUH?!? what happened to beating sense into sami?? tho maybe he's planning to get a title to prove a point to sami or something. it felt weirdly sudden to me either way.

then jey shows up, blah blah you disrespected the tribal chief blah blah and then he says he feels sick and smth about getting put down. typical guard dog jey imo, nothing incredibly notable.

then your regularly scheduled Women's Match That Feels Like It Was Thrown In Arbitrarily featuring nia jax and tamina. reginald, shayna, and natalya were also there, because why wouldn't they be. shayna interferes and it's not seen by the ref, but tamina wins regardless, so all is well I guess? idk I just wish there was more depth in the women's division and less tag action and a LOT less reginald.

KO shows up, talks about how it's his first IC title match in years, how he was delighted, how he wasnt expecting this but isn't complaining, how he's gonna knock apollo down, and then big e shows up because he's cool like that! then big es like "hahaha ur cool n shit but this is my match" and kevin goes "yeah this is ur match but not this week because this week is my match and I'll be champ" and they go "hahahahahaha" yknow the white girl fake laugh

it was funny to me but I didn't expect kevin still.

daniel bryan then tells adam pearce to make the match between roman and cesaro and when adam says he'll try dbry tells him to do more than try. persistent.

then comes the ic title match! sami joins commentary midway through the match and watches apollo retain after quite a bit via Surprise Rollup My Beloved (/s), kevin hit the stunner after losing, and the huge azeez guy fuckin' nail kevin in the face. then, sami gets up and dances over kevin which is the funniest damn thing

anyway I love kevin and hate apollo but I'm glad things ended how they did because this really is big es match.

then this segment, which I can only describe with this screenshot of the article I'm using to refresh my memory

just paul heyman rambling. typical.

then apollo shows up, talks, gets attacked by big e, and then gets checked up on by azeez.

then, we see aleister black (good to know you're alive, buddy!) and hes surrounded by candles, wearing glasses with a book in his hands. he tells a story from his childhood that involves dragons and then cuts a promo that digs at the viewers. I think aleisters character is interesting but I was also on video call with my partner so I didn't catch all of it BDIXNAODBSKS

then we see dolph ziggler and robbery noodle, and they cut a promo on how rey mysterio is epic but his son has "big gucci shoes" to fill. then we get the street profits, who are interrupted by BAYLEY MY BELOVED. she cuts a promo on how she's gonna kick biancas selfish spoiled ass basically BUT THE FUNNY PART is that montez was on the phone tattle tailing on bayley TO BIANCA. bianca shows up and a match between bianca and bayley is made for backla- scuse me, wrestlemania backlash. seeing bianca and bayley in the same frame made my heart happy regardless of context.

the mysterios take on the alpha academy, have some close calls, and then rey wins with the 619 as he does. smooth. there was nothing overly remarkable about it. it was just...a good match. wrestling.

then Good Ole Tony (cesaro) comes out with dbry. they taunt (?) roman, who comes out and challenges daniel for his own title, blatantly ignoring cesaro. BUT if daniel loses he has to leave smackdown. cesaro urges daniel to accept, and daniel does, loudly.

overall:

I think it was okay! I've always preferred smackdown to raw but there were things I couldn't make sense of, like kevin owens's seemingly sudden addition to the IC title scene and the women's tag matches in general. I was also miffed that seth just kinda...disappeared...in the middle of his match...and didn't show up...for the rest of the show. could just be me.

thank you for coming to my TEDtalk