#just a lot of people interacting with stuff there even tho it's hidden from searches

[bigboobshaunt]

Why are things in my nsfw blog getting notes all of a sudden

[msommers]

just some quick little intro posts for my bg/dnd girlies bc they've been getting a lot of attention recently, about time they get on the blog proper

AURETTA STORMSEEKER half-human, half-sun elf

neutral good

storm sorcery, tempest cleric, evocation wizard (yay lvl 20 mods)

deity: Aerdrie Faenya

big sister out of 4 half-elves born to the same human mother, Jocelyn, with 4 separate baby daddies lmao

Auretta's father, Eilethal, is a sun elf from the city of Taltempla on Evermeet—a city full of elves, focused on magic, learning, and religion.

Auretta inherited her father's divine magic but failed to find somebody capable of properly teaching her (she and her mother lived in a town with almost no magic for 13~ years before moving to BG, where they struggled to find and afford a teacher).

a few months after her 20th birthday, Eilethal finally showed up after forgetting how time works for two decades #justelfthings. he offered to bring her back to Taltempla with him so he could teach her magic and she ended up agreeing.

Auretta would occasionally utilize magic to speak with her family back in BG, and made 2-3 visits thru the years, but ultimately she got worse at maintaining contact over the course of her 35~ years in the elven city.

by the time she reunites with her siblings for the BG3 campaign, it's been years since they've seen each other and there's definitely an adjustment period to the Auretta who changed quite a bit during her time with the elves.

probably?? a Zevlor romance. mostly convinced of it, a little wiggle room left as i solidify her some more.

MEDORA RUNESCRIBE half-human, half-moon elf

maybe lawful good?? haven't decided bc who really cares about alignment

divination wizard, divine soul sorcerer

deity: Deneir

her childhood isn't determined yet bc i focused on her later life but she's giving only child. maybe an orphan, idk

worked as an archivist within BG's temple district, reading through countless scrolls and tomes and manuscripts and yada yada. tragically boring woman who loved her work even tho it was one of the most dull and tedious things to most other people

undecided on some of the details, but what matters is that Medora finds a lost page written by Deneir himself with vague ramblings that she believes tell of a secret hidden away within the Weave itself. insert some nonsense about questing and tracking down here. Medora finds and tugs on the strand of the Weave and discovers what it really was—a fragment of the deity himself, safely hidden until her nosy ass decided to seek it out, now bound inside of her.

Medora becomes a vessel for the First Scribe, infused with his long dormant magic and a part of his soul. this leads to her divine soul leveling as he becomes stronger during her BG3 adventure. undecided what becomes of this fragment (she might keep it idk), or if he speaks to her or not.

Medora goes thru numerous changes due to this merge. she slowly becomes more obsessive and scatter-minded; she undertakes his abandoned quest searching for the Metatext; her eyes shift entirely to his vibrant purple, and as she gains levels they begin to sprout veins of gold from the pupil outwards as the divine magic pushes her body's limits; her hair begins to grey to match his; her eyesight gets worse without the use of magic lmao

a peak in "gotta add headcanons into the story to give more character and exploration" oc creation. yeah she's interacting w the main game story but also i've got my own fun stuff to imagine on the side also going down

not sure about her romance. Gale seems fitting for numerous reasons but we'll see

[misterbitches]

hi! this is long as shit i’m sorry. i hope it makes sense. i ahve adhd and like 5 million learning disorders so this is just word vomit cos there’s so many words in my brain. my b.

i’ve had such a tough day so thank you for replying and sharing! @yeedak​ 

i was thinking about what i wrote and i meant to clarify that as well. some cases are fine for both parties and it’s not like you weren’t consenting and it seems like you were happy! same with my friend who was dating a 20 yr old. if they’re happy you know i’ll clown on ‘em but yea. so for anyone that sees these posts your relationship with your partner who is older or whatever. i’m some dumb girl on the internet okay. ill side eye older ppl tho

i think a lot of people feel the same way you do now (me included.) it feels really good at the time but alter we can see the dynamics playing out. i’m 29 now and i think aging is just such a huge process. it’s wild how you at 31 are a totally different person, right?

and the US racism is probably some of the worst ever in its iteration because of slavery which started from europe etc but USA is so fucking unique bc of columbus bringing slaves here and displacing indigenous peoples or hispanola and because america is so influential the way it views race, particularly with black people as objects, has so deeply permeated into the current historical psyche globally. it’s fascinating to track how necessary anti blackness is to the flourishing of america but also the world at this point. also want to point out how fuckign scary sinophobia is here especially for covid. one is a straight historical line (black ppl + the US) and the other had to be manufactured and to continue to exploit the non-white americans and keep antiblackness in tact.i could go on about this all day. the pain of this place is immense.yet as bad as it is here, this is still the only place i truly feel safe as a black person. because of the unique experience we have in america and through the diaspora especially because we are veyr much ocncentrated here. it would be nice to like move to norway and have some alleviation financially or get free healthcare it’s just not feasible if no one looks like me. it’s fucking tough. 

i hope you don’t hate it here though and people treat you with respect. but as you know being a woman and jewish and an immigrant....shit is tough. the USA is a hellhole. :( america is so deeply tainted and desperately bad because it was founded on strife and blood and there’s no way to reverse that and what this country did in turn when it gained enough power and could capitalize off of the colonial forefathers. this is why we hsould all luv revolution!!!

HOWMEVERRRR 

boy oh boy oh BOY OH BOYYYYYYYY. well wlecome to the world of BL lmao especially as an adult with some obviously deep perspective just given your background. it is a fucking mess and it’s a hard mess to like but it pulls you in. i approach it like i do with soap operas since these are essentially telenovelas, you know? just like the drama at a billion. but the tricky part of that is like....what parts of it do we understand for critiquing? because so many of the shows are so bad at being like good pieces of things to look at just production wise and story wise. but i feel like these shows ask us to take them seriously, so why shouldn’t we take the content seriously? and this is being primarily peddled to young girls. 

i bring this up often but i read this thing about yaoi and the interest younger women/girls have in BL and its fascination with pederasty essentially. this component i think is key when we talk about who gets affected by these things the most. society in general is bad 4 girls bla bla we know lmao but in “more sexually conservative” societies it may be harder for these girls to feel safe even expressing normal emotions romantically and sexually and particularly with guys. some people hypothesized, and i think i agree with this hypothesis, that they can live through the casualness of BL. they don’t feel threatened because they can put themselves into the shoes of the other character. oftentimes, the more feminine or the younger. this was in conjunction with the age gap aspect (they say pederasty as well because there’s unethical age gaps that r gross and that is indeed what we would at least call a touch of sexual abuse if people dont feel like calling it an obsession with youth and power and uhhh young ppl and perhaps kids) where maybe girls could see themselves in these situations as the person being saved, loved, taken care of, and sadly also sexually active and penetrated. 

i think that’s just one aspect of it but i do think there’s validity in who gravitates towards it. i cannot imagine seeing this stuff and not getting enough information as a young kid, i sure as fuck know i didn’t!, and seeing these things and you look at it with 0 critique because you’re young and you may have no interest in it or you simply cannot understand what is wrong. no one is teaching you these things and these shows confirm it. and it is wild how intrinsic patriarchy is to BL although in its existence it also can’t be in line with patriarchy given the nature of two [cis] men!

it begs the question about the replacement aspect. is it just so girls can put themselves in these characters shoes? if so then that means we believe that gender is so interchangeable within our relationships and interactions and that doesn’t seem right. there’s more to lgbtq+ than just existing; it’s finding ways to communicate, finding a family, safety, your people, being a free person. there’s a lot to gain and a lot a lot to lose. and a gay man is also not a woman because those are also two distinct experiences.  especially in societies that have a more hidden aspect to sexuality (idk how to word this bc the BL industry would NEVER survive in america but in a way there’s a more “progressive” look at homosexuality but it’s still fucked up because we live in a Society, you know? at the same time look at what we are doing to trans kids. literally waging war so it’s bonkers how we all collectively have some real progress happening but at the same time not at all. the concept of ‘ladyboys’ and the frequency we see trans people in thai shows is wild and something that we absolutely do not see here in the US. still, none of these groups feel safe or are getting better material conditions in either place. we just show the ways we can try and tolerate oppression witout eliminating it imo)

to me it is clear: it’s money. which most things exist to make money so. but also who is the audience for these shows? and they have to market towards them. all that said all hope is not lost there are some decent shows. it’s just like regular media on TV though where it’s so fucking saturated as an industry that it’s literally sifting through garbage. and there are some days when you can handle the trash and others where it really fucking hurts to watch the violence, the rape, the manipulation, the violations, the stupid messaging. i have never seen more people trying to do mental gymnastics and seeing if things were “technically rape” than in teh BL fandom and that is so fucking sad.

i came into these shows at 28 with almost 0 clue of what as media BL was like esp as media that countries can use as soft power with the revenue. but i realize like...i’m 29 now and so many people don’t have a sizeable, though not huge, amount of life experience. and i wonder for people on the internet who are usually searching for something if they spend so much time on it like what a 15 year old girl thinks. what a 20 year old girl thinks. 

it is incredibly problematic and so awful but there’s also some rewards. if you haven’t i would definitely watch i told sunsset about you which i don’t think i’m going to finish and i doubt i’ll watch the second installment (watch this be a lie) but when i say some fucking impeccable storytelling and art? phew. now that is a fucking piece of media that works. it takes from moonlight heavily and you can see like...the artistic dedication is there and the story makes its world and sets up its stakes extremely well. 

i think because this is marketed towards much younger people too they know they dont have to try as hard. but they SHOULD because then you can have a fucking masterpiece like that. i think even this prolific gay thai filmmaker (who is like solidly against the government) who is so respected (and who i like a lot! if u wanna know i can tell u lmao but the films are very uhhhhhhhh “artsy”) would like i told sunset about you. i wish more people had budget like that and also just cared about the stories. it’s the fucking magic of art to figure out what you can do but there is very little incentive honestly. idk i am very pessimistic. there are days when it’s really a great pick me up and distraction but it is never a place i would love for to feel seen or heard but i’m more of the mind of i never trust the mainstream until they prove me wrong ;) 

or i never trust the mainstream and i still buy into it anyway and then cry when i don’t like what i see adn i yell “BOO GET OFF THE STAGE!” when an old man won’t leave a teenager alone

[imaginesmylife]

Could I ask what it would be like to be best friends with the dragon slayers?

imagine-fairytail-dorks answered: Natsu: I mean what do i even say here… if you watch fairy tail and his interactions with Lucy…yeah. expect him to invade your house / dorm constantly and he totally peeks inside your furniture’s drawers- ‘ I must unveil the deep dark secrets of ___’s room! ‘ dragging you off to missions out of nowhere like you could be going shopping or taking a bath, it doesn’t matter to him if it’s day or night, you’re COMING. totally draws on your face while you sleep (again this is cannon) - do not play monopoly with HIM. I REPEAT DO NOT. THERE WILL BE PIECES MISSING AND DISAPPEARING EVERYTIME likes to steal food from your fridge a lot “ NATSU, YOU HAVE YOUR OWN FOOD! “ “ but yours is better. “ you feeling down? he will not promise to listen to a long hour rant, unless its really tragical, but he will probably open his arms like ‘ ya wanna hug ? ‘ makes silly hairdos to your hair on purpose and laughs it off.

Gajeel: sleepovers in which he will probably help you so much with the meals, like # secret master chef gajeel at your service steals food from your plate when you’re not watching and thinks he’s fooling you but really he isn’t. Okay but he’s that guy who if you need help on really weird occasions he won’t mind helping you out: “ Gajeel, i forgot my towel can you hand it over? “ “ Gajeel, you mind going downstairs to get me some pads / tampons? I just noticed i ran out of them…. “ “ Gajeel, we’re out of pasta, please make a quick run to the mini! “ the old ladies are chuckling at him and it pisses him off a bit but he feels …manly? to be able to help you? like so blessed so moved # this is what a man is! - quoting elfman. poking you randomly while you’re watching tv or reading books, specially if he’s bored like “ gajeel …” “ shh, weren’t you watching it?” he’s really clueless on how to comfort others in times of need, so all he’s going to do is listen to your problems without saying a word if he can’t find a way to better them, and /or open his arms weirdly for you to receive the hugging . him being salty about others with you like “ uhhh i can’t tolerate that fake arse. “ “ me too , mate. wish they’d just get a vase thrown at their heads. “ #saltmates fist bump

Wendy: Tea sessions with her and Charle reading club time!!!!! doing intricate hairdos to each other and SLEEPOVERS !!!!! 1! !!! 1 !! ranting about your life  … specially boys if you want wendy to turn red like a tomato “ Wendy, stop being so flustered over this! “ “ I can’t help it, Charle… “ light sparring sessions if you wanted to, specially since she needs to be on pair with her dragon slayer friends cooking sessions shopping downtown on fridays. telling each other bedtime stories to sleep one of the best at comforting people, will do anything to help you, and feel bad if they can’t. cuddling sessions and sad disney movies are a must.

Laxus: Beware the raijinshuu will probably be after you too. either jelly or anxious lots and lots of indirect jokes, innuendos or puns like “ ya know what’s up right in the morning? “ “ hOE DON’T DO IT.” He actually gives pretty good input on stuff - he could go with you to stores and be like: “ no that pattern doesn’t suit your figure that well, you have wide hips so it will only make you looked even larger than usual. “ “ look i don’t want to influence you but… this earphones brand is better, it’s durable, the sound is great, and it can allow you so many more functions blahblahblah… “ Not even the raijinshuu know about this side of him but he must always pet the wandering animals in the streets and feed them if he can like AWWWWWW ANIMALS !!!! 111 !!! 1 !!1! Shares food with you no problems. he’s just chill countering your sarcasm with his sarcasm and vice-versa “ Do i seem amused to you? “ “ hmmmm in a scale of  1 to 10? “ “ hahahaha. very funny. “ “ you’re welcome. “ B) surprisingly affectonate when others are out of it - his hugs might crush you a bit tho but he does not mean it - can’t measure his strength tbh “ Laxus…. you’re .crushing me.. can’t breathe, and my boobs – “ “ OH SORRY. “

Sting: Walking in unnanounced on accident sometimes inside your room and being like ‘ OH SHIT SORRY! but nice ass by the way. “  cue a finger gunning at you while he walks out and tries to play it cool but you’re throwing objects at him randomly “ STING, YOU IDIOT! “ “ i guess you can say he STINGS. “ - Rufus “…Frosch thinks so too! “ ba-dum-tss. Watching a movie in a mess of limbs and legs while you share blankets and fighting over the last popcorn / chips /cookies like “ STING, NO THAT ONE’S MINE! “ “ FIRST COME FIRST SERVE ~. “ an d he just casually grabs it and yep they’re gone. he’s faster than you anyways # gdit sting “ unless you wanna take it out of my mouth now? “ “ eww no, keep it. “ # not sure if win or hurt - Sting you must have at least a sleepover once a week or month. he will probably be really deep questioning things in life before you go to bed # phylosophical sting hour ‘ why is the color blue called like that? why is the sky full of stars (coldplay reference badumtss) ? why couldn’t it be full of cheetos? i mean, why are they even like that? starts don’t look like what we draw even it’s jsut a whole mass of galaxy inside another massive rock thing, but from here it seems so small,… i feel like an ant. “ “ how much deep do you think the ocean is? “ # help him. Sting would be that guy that if he were best friends, specially with a girl, would probably go like: ‘ please unveil the darkest secrets of your gender to me, because seriously i don’t get most of you, i’m confused af. ‘ with such a very serious face you end up laughing. “ I’m not joking, ___ . “ staring contests in which he always loses because he starts snorting at something anytime: “ what is it this time, Sting. “ “ your clock…pfft, it’s making  a very..pffft– weird figure in the wall ! “ if you feeling down he’s all up for cuddling session. of course,he will try to the best of his ability to help you with your problems but he prefers to firstly focus on you and spoil you.

Rogue: more mature than Sting but still a bit salty also good at giving remarks like Laxus be it at shopping or life decisions, but sometimes he comes out too strong.. “ Huh, okay Rogue.. Okay. “ “ JUST DO IT, ____. Really– “ he secretly collects candy every time he can, he has a hidden stash of candy in his bedroom- sting once found it and almost died. # do not unleash the kraken probably offers himself as poison taster to each of your recipes and vice versa “ HMm it’s good but what if we added—” “ Rogue, no the last time we improvised it ended as a disaster. “ searching for warmth, he will accidentally inch towards you like in a chase if you’re sleeping over at his room; kick him away or you’ll end up on the floor. (!!!) (THIS IS BASED on a true story) he is a roomcon lover don’t even tell it to the guildmates. he would never hear the end of it. “ NO, JACK! JAAAAAAAAAAAAACK!!!! “ good at consoling people but slightly awkward since he’s unused to it - he’ll pat you your back weirdly #save him.

Erik / Cobra he’s that guy who’s making snarky remarks at everything and anything around him # so salty will turn to you in a joke and be very inoportune and nosy like: “ so what pattern is it today? hello kitty? bows? hearts? stripes? or is it plain?” ERIK NO. he’s very protective of you though like no kid – if you ever trade him for someone lese, like let’s say you were supposed to have lunch with him at the tuesdays and you went off somewhere instead and cancelled it. he’s hurt and ONTO YOU . no escape. throws food at you while you’re distracted - be it a popcorn , a candy, a chip…. but he pretends he’s innocent likes to invade your room once in a while but is at least more respectful than the other dragon slayers…. sometimes he’s deep af though like he might just vent about life indirectly: “ if you could what would you’ve changed about your life , ____ ? “ protect him gives really nice hugs to be honest will beat the crap out of anyone who makes you sad tbh.

Source:  imagine-fairytail-dorks

[sparxwrites]

I'm not sure if you've answered something similar before (I can't find it if you have but knowing tumblrs terrible search function that's not saying much) but why do you write such dark sexual stories? What is it that you find so appealing in these twisted tales? Please understand this is from a point of good faith - I'm not judging and I enjoy dark stories and erotica both, only seperately. I'm just morbidly curious as to why you enjoy the combination as I see no appeal in it personally

oof, just a nice easy question to answer on a friday night, anon. okay. there’s a lot of answers to this question, depending on how personal i want to get and also like... which stories you’re talking about.

some stories i write that could be considered “darkly sexual” are categorically erotica. stuff involving weird, niche kinks, or monsters, or “dub-con” (which is not a real thing, i know, it’s a fantasy erotica thing)... the appeal there is, idk, whatever the fantasy is. they are, in my mind, written as fantasies - a fic where a character doesn’t want sex and then ends up "enjoying” having a monster lay eggs in them is obviously not what happens irl. eggs aside, no one ends up actually enjoying sexual assault. they’re written (from my side) with the air of “irl this would be Utterly Reprehensible, but what i’m essentially writing here is like... a roleplay session between two consenting partners where i am both partners”. it’s all fantasy! it’s all fake! it’s a bdsm scene or whatever where they’re both pretending/playing a role, except it’s just me writing it out with little finger puppets (either for my amusement/titillation, or the amusement/titillation of others).

then there’s... Other Stuff. see also, a lot of my percy and ripley fics. and i find it interesting that people often read those as fetish stuff because, whilst they do have sex in them, those are fundamentally horror stories. the appeal i get out of them is the same as whump/darkfic. when i write about horrible, traumatising sex where one person clearly doesn’t enjoy it, that is not a sexual fantasy for me. characters roleplaying at it, sure, me playing fingerpuppets with it, sure. but something deeply and fundamentally focused on the trauma and violation of that kind of thing is not, for me, sexual (and if what you’re getting off on is the actual nonconsent, rather than the playing at/silly version of nonconsent, i have some questions/concerns. this seems like a weird and not-really-there line, but it’s surprisingly obvious and disconcerting when someone/a fic crosses it tbh). what i get out of that is a deep sense of catharsis. i’ve gone into why i think i (and others) get this catharsis a little in my meta tag and this specific post - but, at the end of the day, i don’t exactly know. 

i think, perhaps, it is that i am a very sad person sometimes, and a very angry person sometimes, and in real life i spend a lot of time keeping both of those things hidden and pressed down, and... there has to be some kind of release valve for those emotions. with fiction, i have a safe way of managing that, both reading and writing - i can be both aggressor and victim, no one gets hurt (i find the thought of hurting people abhorrent; i nearly passed out once because a stranger was in pain from a dislocated shoulder, despite the lack of visible injury. hyperempathy is wild), i get to work through a whole bunch of psychological shit from various stuff i won’t go into... i often refer to writing as a release, or a valve, or a way to ease the pressure inside my head, or a form of venting. 

as to why sexual assault often shows up in these stories... i do frequently write whump without sexual assault, but it’s also like. a) a bunch of personal stuff that i don’t give enough of a shit to talk about, but it’s there, and b) sex and sex-adjacent stuff (often rape and assualt, but even consensual stuff!) has such a fascinating way of crystallising character/power dynamics, or stripping people bare, or exposing vulnerability, or dragging up really awful, messy, scary, painful, confusing stuff. and that makes it often a really good target when you (like me) want all those emotions in your writing because you’re using it as a pressure-valve vent, and as a way to safely experience and work through them. writing about difficult or traumatic relationships to the self, the body, to sex and to other people... sex is really good for all of that stuff. idk.

also, sometimes fics end up a weird mix of the two. i can’t think of any off the top of my head for cr, but for yogs (my previous fandom) i wrote a handful of things for a character that was essentially straight out of a horror movie and another monster character, with some real questionable consent stuff. 50% of that was “this is horrible and manipulative and just. really fucking Awful” and 50% of that was “hrnghghgh tentacles hot” so like. yknow. my brain is a weird mess i guess, is the takeaway message here.

(sometimes, there’s also an element of “can i get myself into this headspace” or “this is an interesting technical exercise” - i wrote something a while back about ripley masturbating to the memory of torturing percy, and that falls into this category. that wasn’t a fetish/fantasy thing, that was a character study, using sex as a medium to work through ripley’s obsessive, violent thoughts and strip away the veneer of imparitiality she so loves to pretend she has.)

idk how well this explains it - this is something i spend a lot of brain-power analysing on a regular basis, because i am constantly nosy about how my brain works and why it works in these weird, angular, fucked-up kinds of ways (not just with writing, the adventures of being autistic means i spend a Lot of time analysing myself to make sure i’m calibrating my interactions with other people correctly). i still haven’t entirely worked it out, and a lot of the stuff i have worked out is personal/messy enough i both don’t want to and can’t be arsed to explain it to strangers on the internet. i hope it’s given a Bit of an explanation tho, and if there’s a specific fic that prompted this comment, feel free to ask me about it specifically, bc i might be able to offer a little more insight as to my thought processes for like... a specific example i guess.

[jynsongxvii-blog]

the late fic that was thrown in the trash apparently(?

A/N: Ik I'm eliminated surprisingly or maybe not to me, but I did finish to write this and liked the interactions, so here you have it! Guess we'll never know what could've happened now tho, but thanks @domschreave​ for the RP from weeks ago. I might write some more stuff for future jyn cause she deserves me giving her an ending, so in case anyone is interested, be on the lookout ❤️  (this fic is around 3500 words and it is not a leaving fic, but a date with dom that happened and i couldn’t post before)

Dom opened his door after my knock. “Hey.” I crossed my arms with a grin. “Hey…I wanted to put dominoes in your room after a meeting so that when you opened the door they'd all fall down...but that's such a mess to get your attention, so I thought I could also just ask.”

“Yeah, that sounds like a lot of work. Did you need something?” “A few hours of your time maybe.” “Are we breaking into some other abandoned thing now?” He asked and I had to hold back a smile. You could call that being predictable, but I took it as a good sign on his part.

“Well...we could. Not sure if you still haven't done it, but I heard something about wanting to climb the outside of a Ferris wheel... and I'm pretty sure the only way to do that is if we go to an abandoned amusement park.”

We both grinned at each other.

“I'm game if you are.”

“I'm always up for a little adventure, but if we die I'm blaming you.” Wouldn’t want to get blamed for the death of a royal.

“Fair enough...Do you happen to know if there are actually any abandoned amusement parks anywhere near here?” “I like having a plan, so yes, I did a little research.” Something I do a lot these days. “There's one in the outskirts of the city. If you want to go... then you have a date with the prettiest girl in the hallway.” I smiled at my own reference to our last date.

“Sure, let's go. And…” he paused to look around the hallway, “You're the only girl in the hallway.” I rolled my eyes with a sigh, slightly amused, but wondering if he’d even noticed the reference I’d made. “Yes, you're a lucky guy.” “You might say I'm the luckiest guy in this hallway.” That almost made me laugh, but I held it back, looking around to refute his claim and finding someone once I squinting at a distant corner. “I think there's a guard there… But he's not getting a date with me, so the title of luckiest is still for you.”

“Alright then. Shall we go?”

After my nod we both started heading for the garage.

“What is today's special on the Dom Express?” He gave me a confused frown. “What?” I didn’t stop my pace and grinned slightly, “I meant what means of transportation are we using this time. I assume walking is off the list since it’s so far away.” “Probably… but I don't know, what kind of vehicle do you want to use?” “I'm... afraid I don't know that much about fancy cars.” I barely knew about cars at all really. Small town and all, where I lived cars were pretty unnecessary. Nonetheless, I cleared my throat after a pause. “I have been hitting the library to figure some of them out though... but I still think you should be the one to give suggestions if you want to go in a car again.” “I don't know... and we don't even have to take a car if you don't want…” “Oh.. No, that's fine. I don't really mind if it's a car or not. Anything is fine really.” I glanced at him briefly. Maybe this was his attempt at making me comfortable? I wanted him to choose this time though, so I added, “But I picked last time, so it's your turn.” “Well I think it's just easier to take my motorcycle, so let's just do that.” “Alright…” I smirked as some of the details from our crazy last date crossed my mind. “Did your dad ever find out we used the Lamborghini?” “Not that I know of… Which means he didn't find out.” “Does that mean he would have told you something if he had found out?” “Yes.” That was his only answer, but I stared at him in silence for another moment, waiting to see if he gave any other details. He didn’t.

I wasn't sure if what I felt was disappointment or not. I just wanted to get to know him. We wouldn't get anywhere if he didn't open up. But then again, maybe the topic was hard or just uncomfortable, so I bit my lip trying to think of a way to make him add on and settled with, “My dad would have hidden all of the keys from you... If he changed places with your dad that is.” “My dad should hide his keys…” Dom mumbled, and I hoped that meant he would say more. “I don't know why he just leaves them out like this. Probably he thinks it looks cool.” “Hmm, he should reconsider his definition of cool.”

He laughed shortly, but since I rarely saw him do so, I counted it as a win--even if I wished it sounded happier. “Probably.” “What would you consider cool? I'm sure car keys on a wall isn't it.”

“I don't know... I'm not sure I have a single definition of "cool".” Maybe not but...That sounded like a smart way to avoid my question. “Motorcycles are cool.” I pointed out, sparing him a glance to see if he understood where I was going with this. “The night sky, the sunrise, hanging out with friends…” I waited for him to add on and surprisingly he did.

“Leather jackets, rock music, ...quiet.” “You mean as in silence?” “Yeah.” “Quite the polar opposite of rock music,” I smiled before looking back ahead. Happy he'd either intentionally or unintentionally given me a detail about himself. “But yeah, silence is cool too. We can be cool right now if you want..” I offered a sheepish smile, hoping he would take my words in good heart. He gave me a small smile back, but didn't say anything else. I took that as a yes to being silent for a while and just followed him the rest of the way to the garage in peaceful silence.

“So motorcycle right?” Dom asked once we reached the garage.

“Yes, you once said you would show it to me anyway.” “Right.”

He handed me a helmet and I stared at his motorcycle after taking it. The design seemed slightly familiar. “What model is it?

“It's a Ducati Diavel.” “Interesting,” I stared at it a while longer, trying to picture it on library pages filled with specs. “I think I remember Ducati from the book I read…” I put the helmet on and struck a pose like the ones we had practiced for magazine issues. “How do I look?” “Cool.” He grinned and I laughed a bit.

“Good.” That was definitely a compliment considering our previous conversation. “Now let's see how well you drive on two wheels.”

He got onto the motorcycle and I followed suit, skeptically. “Ready?” “Uh, yes, hopefully I won't fall off.”

“You'll just have to hold on tight.”

Smirking, I placed my hands on his shoulders. “That's the oldest in the book, Dominoes.”

“Whatever.”

He sped off into the almost-night and I tightened the grip around his shoulders to avoid falling. When we started passing by next to cars though, I ended up placing my arms around his torso.

You better not kill me, Dominoes.

“Is it safe to move now?” I mumbled, clinging onto his torso as the motorcycle stopped. “Yeah, you can get off.” I let go of him while clearing my throat. “Sorry.” “It's fine. So, ready to go?” Standing up and taking my helmet off, I smiled. “Always.” Behind me was the Ferris wheel a few feet away. It seemed huge and a little rusty, yet not old enough to break under our weight. I placed a short strand of hair behind my ear as I searched for the way to climb it. I had to admit one of the inconveniences of shorter hair was it getting in your face because of the wind.

“We're actually gonna climb it?” Dom finally asked, breaking the silence. I couldn’t help but laugh at the question. “There's a ladder, no? You're the one with this on your to-do-one-day list. We can scout the area if you changed your mind though.” “No, I'm fine. I was just checking if you were too scared. Since, you know, you were terrified the entire time on my motorcycle.” I glared at him with narrowed eyes, but smirked. “I love heights, I'm just not good with high speeds on moving objects... yet.” But I will. Just you wait. “Uh huh. Sure.” I faked a gasp. “Are you questioning my tolerance of heights, Dominoes?” “Just a bit.” He smirked. I laughed with a scoff. “Well, then let's prove you wrong.” Squinting at the Ferris Wheel, I pointed when I found a ledge where we could sit on with the wheel not moving. “I think there's a small spot for us to sit there halfway up.” Offering one last grin, I walked over to the ladder at the Ferris Wheel’s mounting and started climbing. Once we were both climbing I asked, “Why did you want to do this?” “I saw it in a movie once and thought it looked cool. Hey, there's another thing to add to the cool list.” I chuckled. “That's way better than keys on a wall. And I find heights in general to be cool.” That led us to discuss the height of the Ferris Wheel, which according to what I’d read was around 150 feet. We only planned to go halfway up but I still took the chance to tease Dom, telling him not to worry about too much. “Have you ever been on one before?” I wondered aloud. “Like, a functioning one? I was only on one when I was younger, but I don't really remember it...though I don't remember much before I was six.” I chuckled, thinking of how Jason reminded some of the weirdest stories from when he was little. Sometimes I couldn’t tell if they were made up or not. “Don't know how other people do.” “Yeah, there are a couple amusement parks near us that we've gone to a lot in the past. I haven't ridden a Ferris wheel in forever though. They're kinda boring after a while.” Boring? I paused at that, holding onto the ladder with one hand and letting go with the other to stare down at the amusement park. The breeze was so refreshing it almost begged you to relax. It wasn’t that surprising to get a glimpse at the beach further away, past the other old games and rides giving into oxidation. “This view gets boring?” “I mean once you've ridden the ride a couple times, yeah.” “Hmm…” I kept climbing. “I would like to say I disagree, but technically I can't.” “Since you haven't ridden on one?”

“Except for that time I don't really remember. Though when I think about it, climbing the outside might be more fun than the actual ride.” I would still love the view however. “I'm pretty sure it is.” “Only because this way I choose how long I stay up. Oh, and because it's cooler of course.” “It's definitely cooler.” “I assume you like roller coasters better... or did those get boring with time as well?” “Nope. Roller coasters are cool.”

“Hmm... what about bumper cars?” “Bumper cars? Lame.” I laughed, thinking I was starting to see a pattern. “I see now. You like the thrill of speed or something new.” “Yeah I guess.” Smirking down at him, pausing the climb, I raised an eyebrow. “You guess?” “Yeah.”

“Well... if I'm wrong you can just tell me instead of guessing.” “There's nothing wrong with saying the phrase "I guess." It doesn't mean you're wrong, it just means it's mostly correct. I guess I like "the thrill of speed" but that's not necessarily how I would've phrased it, so I guess I'd agree to it.” Wow, okay cowboy, settle down. “I... didn't say there was something wrong with the phrase.. Just seems like it closes off the conversation. I don't mind silence, Dom, but I can't really know you as a person if we never talk.” I sighed before climbing again, not knowing what else to say. It seemed like saying anything would cause some sort of argument. “But alright.”

“I've just been assaulted by some of the other girls complaining about me saying "I guess". I'm just really tired of it.” When we reached the ledge, I stood up and stared down at him with a head tilt. “Assaulted?” “Yelled at? Bitched at? Confronted? Verbally assaulted.” “Huh..” That’s odd. I sat down letting my legs dangle in the air as I gazed at the amusement park. I could imagine some of the girls in the Selection losing their temper at him, but it still felt weird. “You sure there wasn't a reason for it?” “I said "I guess". Apparently that's illegal around here.” “You sound pretty worked up about it.” I patted the spot next to me, offering a small smile, hoping he would calm down. “You don't need to get defensive all the time... when I mentioned it I didn't mean it in a bad way. I just meant that if I were wrong about an assumption you could tell me. I couldn't be sure of what reason there was behind your "I guess."” He obliged and sat down. “It's just hard not to get defensive when I've been yelled at about the same thing multiple times. And it's not something that I think deserves being yelled at for.” It seemed unreasonable that a girl would get upset about something like that, but I couldn’t really know what had happened, it wasn’t really my place to take sides. After a moment of silence I replied with: “I can't really say who was right since I wasn't there... but maybe stress also had a part in it. Selections aren't as simple as they're set up to be and I'm sure it's the same for you. When two forest fires meet halfway they'll just make a bigger mess.” He nodded. “I'm not saying I'm perfect, I just don't like being scrutinized so harshly by people I might spend the rest of my life with. I get enough criticism from the public and the press... And my father.” I looked at him surprised he would bring up his father into conversation at all, yet composing myself, I tried smiling apologetically. “Is he... harsh?” Dom avoided my gaze, staring ahead. “Sometimes.” It sounded like those sometimes were enough to bother him, and being close with my dad myself, I always felt a little bad for people that didn’t get the chance of that.

I watched him in silence for a moment and hesitantly, reached for his hand before squeezing and smiling softly. I hoped I looked encouraging while doing so and waited to see if he would add anything else. In a pleasant surprise, he did. “You don't have to worry about him, though. He's only ever hard on me.” “Well... if I worry about you, I'll worry about it either way…” I averted my gaze as I said that, clearing my throat, trying not to sound awkward. “If you make me worry about you that is..” My smile turned sheepish at the end when I looked back at him. Way to be subtle, Jyn.

He shrugged as if done with the conversation and looked away. My smile faltered and I pursed my lips, staring down at the amusement park too. “You really are a red and green light on at the same time…” “What do you mean?” Back in our first date I hadn’t really explained what I meant with it in detail, but up in the Ferris Wheel I did, not meeting his eyes. “You know how sometimes traffic lights don't work and both the red and green light are on, so you're stuck there unsure if you should keep going or wait? Well, it's like that, but in a conversation... it's hard to talk to you sometimes. Like if I say something wrong everything will crumble to bits.” I dared to glance at him then. “I don't like that feeling... but I want to see if this can work... if we can work.” “I'm sorry I'm like that.” I shook my head. It wasn’t like I wanted him to feel bad either. “You don't have to apologize... or I guess you do...?” Rambling took over. “It's not like all you do is bad-- not that you're precisely doing something bad-- I kinda like you even if you're stubborn sometimes... I'm just not good when I don't see trust, but I wouldn't ask you to change who you are either and--” I sighed, dropping my gaze. “I'm just making this worse, I'm sorry.” He sighed too. “I don't want you to feel like you have to be careful about everything you say to me. I just don't like being interrogated... or insulted... I didn't think that would be so difficult but maybe I am too sensitive about some things…” “Maybe... just a little…” I eyed him warily. “But if I ever make you feel like that it's better if you just talk to me about it... Calmly. I promise I'll hear you out.” Dom nodded silently and I smiled a little at the sight before kissing his cheek and staring back at the sky filled with stars now. “We should probably head back to the palace soon.” He pointed out quietly. I kept my eyes fixed on the stars but mumbled, “Five more minutes of being cool?” “Sure.” I liked how he seemed to soften a bit after our talk. Made me think he wasn’t always jokes and teasing. “Thanks.” “Just let me know when you're ready to go.” Nodding, I let the night sky swallow me with it’s beauty, the lights of the city too far away to ruin the view of the constellations. It was a beautiful night and I’d made some progress with Dom, the breeze still met me with delight and my short hair danced wildly with it.

It wasn’t like back home, but it was still pretty great.

In front of the bike again I pointed out Dominic needed something new to add to his list of things he hadn't done and wanted to do. He agreed, but admitted he didn’t know what that would be. I told him if he ever figured it out and it was something doable, I’d be up for it. He assured he would tell me if he did which, to be honest, made me feel even better about the evening.

I grabbed the helmet on the bike and stared at it as if it were a challenge, putting it on afterward. “Okay, maybe it'll be less scary this time.

He actually smiled at that. The simple smile I’d noticed I liked on our first date. “You're not going to scream the whole time again are you?” His joke took me by surprise and I stared at him agape for a moment before smiling myself. “I wasn't yelling!” “Uh huh, then what do you call it? Breathing loudly?” “Well--” I was ready to argue, but it was hard not to laugh at the situation and I ended up pulling down the visor on my helmet to hide my amusement instead. “Maybe it is.” “Alright. Lets just get going.”

We both got on and I held onto him again as he started up the engine, joking, “Hope you have good eyes for the dark.” Dom was quick to point out: “The motorcycle does have a headlight you know.” Little smarty pants, are you now? “I'm glaring at you under this visor just so you know.” “Glad to hear it.”

“So was that better than the last time?” I took my helmet off with a smile and said, “I breathed with my normal volume mostly, so yes, it was better.” “Good. I'm glad.” “I'm glad too...did you have fun?” Not too many questions Jyn, he already told you enough about himself. “Forget it, I've made enough questions today.” “It's fine. I did have fun.” I thought I almost saw the hint of a smile on his face at that

“Okay, that's good to hear... it's kind of late so you don't have to walk me to my room if you don't want to.” “I can if you want…” I looked at the motorcycle and mumbled “only if you want to..” again, making Dominoes roll his eyes. Looks like I still got it.

“This is getting us nowhere. Come on. I'll walk you to your room.”

I grinned in victory and followed him out of the garage. Maybe Kat was right and I had a chance at this.

:)

[pastelpurpleprimadonna]

hnnnnnn need help finishng this, anyone was be a co-author? This is my sort of "backstory" for mei, how she met kagekao and how she discovered she was half demon and magic etc,,,,etc

Beginning- Kagekao

Mei is with her foster family and hating life, she’s in a bad mental place and really needs friends. Too much anxiety, can’t make friends. She gets abused mentally/emotionally by beatrice and patricia. Pretty much doesn’t know what to do or how to cope and is just suffering. Few weeks later the local news starts to complain about missing adults whose corpse get found torn, scratched and mangled. The town issues a curfew to keep people safe, even tho it only seems to be the adults that go missing, noticeably men. During school mei gets taunted and teased by a boy she refused to date and now he won’t leave her alone. Mei hates her classes, her teachers and the school in general. Few weeks later the “teasing” gets worse and worse up to the point that the boy and his friends start to follow her when they spot her in public. She’s scared and her anxiety is getting worse bc she doesn’t know how to make them leave her alone, she’s too scared to tell teachers and the kids just do what they want. Much later the abuse gets to a point that she can’t stand anymore, they keep following her, stealing her stuff or breaking it. She goes to the counselors who are mortified by her story and immediately go to do something, several kids get called in and are questioned. They all tell them about [boy] messing with her and hurting her. Boy gets asked and of course lies. Parents are called, detentions made and mei is safe, for now. Next few weeks is rlly good for her, she’s calmer and no longer worries about people running up and taking something of hers. All is great for a while, until the killings start happening again. One hapless day mei is out and about on her bike delivering something to the post office for her neighbors when she spots something weird. It looked like a man standing beside a small clearing of trees.... Just watching people go by. As mei passes him they make “eye contact”, even tho he was wearing the most horrifying mask mei had ever seen. Unsettled mei continues to the post office and drops off the package. On her way back she notices he(?) was gone.

A week later mei sees him again, this time at the park. He’s sitting high up in the branches watching the adults play around with the kids. From what mei could tell all he was doing was watching, nothing else. He seemed harmless, is what her anxiety told her. She was too scared to interact or say anything about him. Everything seemed fine, until one of the adults from the park went missing. A week later they found his and his mothers bodies torn/scratched/mangled in their own home. Mei remembered him, she often delivered packages for him and his mom. Stressed mei does something she’s never done before, investigate. When the police finally leave she sneaks into his house to find “evidence”. After searching for 30mins she doesn’t find anything, she almost gives up. Until she spots it, a black and white bloodied scarf lying on the floor. Spooked mei runs out of the house, with the scarf. The next few hours are spent with mei wondering how shes going to tell people about the killer, what would she say? That he wears a mask and likes to climb? After some pondering mei decides to sleep, the current problem can be her tomorrow selfs problem. 2 weeks, she kept the scarf hidden. Threw it in the bottom of her closet under all of her extra yarn and old clothes. She didn’t know what to do with it, she couldn’t wash it could she? That would be erasing evidence. Her anxiety kept her up and thinking about all of the horrible things that could happen, she could be arrested for keeping evidence hidden, she would get expelled. The only good outcome she could think of was that she might be taken and put in a new foster home. Laying there for a few hours a horrifying thought crossed her mind, what if he came looking for it? It belonged to him, why wouldn’t he want it back? Mei began to freak out, she was terrified. If he did come for it would he hurt her? Her freak out turned into a full blown panic attack. She couldn’t calm herself, she was scared of him. After managing through her PA she tried making up a plan, maybe she could just throw it away? Or put it back where it was? She threw those ideas out the window quickly, if she put it back he would know that someone near the house took it and it was likely he’d come around hers, if she threw it away he’d probably find and get angry and kill whoever trash can it was in. All of these thoughts swam around, increasing her anxiety. No matter what idea she would conjure up she knew he’d find out it was her or someone would get killed. She lied there thinking and thinking but couldn’t come up with anything, soon enough sleep took over.

From outside of her small rounded window a shadowy figure watched, amused.

 The next day mei was still freaking out, and to make matters worse she started carrying the scarf around with her. She was terrified, what if he broke into her house and found it? He would kill her for sure. So mei carried with wherever she went, the store, library, school and even her “job”. She was scared of the thought of him finding her and doing horrible things. This is pretty much how it was for the entire week, her being terrified and paranoid everywhere she goes. Eventually she began to calm down, the killings have stopped and the curfew has been lifted. Everything seems safe and fine so mei decides to venture to the park, mostly bc she had nowhere to be or anything to do. Mei had just settled herself comfortably on a slide right before him. He was here, at the park watching her. Her body began to seize in terror, she was at the park, alone with him. Consciously mei reached for the her bag. He watched her, giving a slight, amused tilt of the head. Shaking hands reached into her bag and slowly pulled out the monochromatic scarf. Surprised he stepped forward and mei began to shake even worse than before, fear clouding her mind and showing her all of the horrifying possibilities. He continued ignoring her trembling and walked forward. Kagekao reached forward, claws outstretched. The sight of the long black talons gave her heart palpitations. Carefully he took the scarf from her wrapped it neatly around his neck. He took a moment to actually look at her, the small and terrified 12 year old girl that didn’t know any better. Kagekao decided to leave her be, her fear is enough punishment. Without saying a word he turns around and walks right back into the woods.

                           Part 2- home life/struggles

It had been two months since her terrifying encounter with Him. He hadn’t hurt her, in fact, after that day the killings had stopped. It seemed to be that he left, or maybe moved to a different town. But he hadn’t, actually he had been watching her for the past few weeks. She was interesting, a small scared kid that had taken something she knew belonged to him, hid from him even. She had guts, it made her interesting. As for her home life, not so much. When she wasn’t being put down emotionally/mentally by her foster parent her “sister” was tormenting her, pulling/pushing her, stealing her things, tearing up her crochet projects (even if it was well hidden) and terrorizing her cats. For kage it was aggravating to watch the little bitch get away with everything while the poor girl just took all of the abuse. In all honesty he wanted to help her. She was treated horribly by most and when she wasn’t she would lock herself away from the outside world, opting to stay with her cats and her books. Just watching her daily life/hobbies exhausted him. How can a twelve year old girl be so interested in knitting? Or sewing? it made no sense whatsoever to him. She should be outside having fun or hanging out with friends, but it didn’t take him long to come to the unsurprising realization that she had none. It should’ve seemed obvious from the 4 cats and self imposed isolation. But he continued to watch her boring day-to-day schedule, which only consisted of school-> coming home-> eating-> then sleeping. All in that order, everyday for weeks he watched the boring cycle repeat itself until it was almost unbearable to watch. Kage couldn’t stand watching her waste her life lying around and knitting or something unimportant. Everything she did was agonizingly boring and simple. And if he were being honest she was pretty pathetic.

On one particular boring day he sat in a tree top near her school waiting for her to come walking by. He sat and waited, 20mins later he realized something might be up. She doesn’t stay after school for anything, not even tutorials (which she really needs) and he knows for a fact she hasn’t joined any clubs. But he continued to wait, 10mins later he decided to check on her. Obviously he couldn’t just stroll through the front. As agile as possible he climbed and swung himself up the tree closest to the window. Glancing he noticed the office was empty. After checking every window and every backdoor he realized that no one was even here. Suspicious he walked around to the farthest parking lot, the one he hadn’t checked yet and there he saw her. Huddled against the wall in fear, while some snot-nosed brat loomed over her, by looking it was obvious he was much older than her. She was terrified, he could see she was trembling and on the verge of tears. Without any further hesitation kagekao walked from behind the corner of the building and made his way to the stupid teen.

>>>

Mei was terrified, boy had come over to her while she leaving the library and waiting for the bus (she wasn’t paying attention to the time) and suddenly he was there, sitting next to her. Trying to talk to her. She ignored him obviously, but when she hadn’t responded is when he really got angry. He reached over and ripped the bag from her hands and threw it. She was shocked and immediately ran to get it, but before she could the little asshole threw her against the wall and start yelling. She was so scared, the possibility of being beaten or raped came to mind. She wanted to cry out, to scream but she couldn’t, they were alone at night in a school parking lot, who would hear her? So she pressed her body against the wall and let him scream at her hoping he would just cool down and leave after he was done. But even as he was yelling and all of the fear that was coursing through her she had the very horrible urge to hurt him, deep down with all of her fear there was apart of her that wanted to hit him, to scream and throw him against the wall just to see if he liked it. She wanted punch him in his stupid red nose and watch him cry on the ground like a bitch. But she couldn’t, her fear kept her from doing anything. Patricia came to mind, if she were here would’ve laughed at her and probably even help the boy. She sat there contemplating her options, run or fight?

She chose to run. Grabbing her bag she flung a book at the boy and fled. Running as fast as her small body would allow. She didn't look back, just ran. After she 20mins she made it home, sweaty and about to puke. Once she was inside the house she got an earful from Beatrice abt being late, chores and personal hygiene..etc. anything she could find to yell at mei. Once the punishment had been set and empty promises to be home early made she hooked her bag on her shoulder and ran for her room. She had barely made to the bed before breaking down. It's exhausting to live with horrible people and have to deal with things alone, no friends. She had never been good at making them. Every time she tried they would grow bored of her or get annoyed and leave. She hasn't had a single friend since she was a kid. She was alone, no friends, no family. She didn’t have a single person in the world that loved her, and it hurt.

Part 3- meeting

When kage had walked forward he had every intention of beating the shit out of the brat, surprisingly though before he could even get close enough she turned, swung her bag and threw a book at the boy and ran faster than any twelve year old could.

             Kagekao decided it was enough, this kid really needed his help. There was so much potential it hurt. He absolutely could not let her go to waste. He didn’t really have a solid plan as to how he was going to introduce himself but he didn’t give it much thought. She’d already seen him before so maybe she won’t freak out. Then again she could alert some people about a strange man on the loose and the scp could show up. The reason he was doing this was mostly for self gain, but even if he refused to admit kagekao enjoyed helping kids that needed help. Adults are already shitty, the kids still have a chance. Kage decided, tomorrow he would put his plan in motion. Seeing her act so quickly in a “do-or-die” situation had impressed him. He really couldn’t wait to get the plan going.

            Mei knew someone was following her, she could feel it. Everytime she went to turn around she always felt him, his weird warm aura. She couldn’t be 100% for sure since she was going on a hunch but she knew she felt something, smelled something. Problem is she didn’t know what to do about it. If she told anyone then her stalker might get mad and do something, if she told beatrice she would go in a full panic and take herself and patricia off to a relatives and leave her behind. They’ve done it before. So mei decided to do nothing, she had no proof anyway. She did keep a wary eye out every now and then. Staring up at the rustling branches, the flutter of fabric she’d see out of the corner of her eye. She was paranoid, she knew it. She just never really believed in her paranoia. She’d always been good at distracting herself and repressing thoughts and memories. But she swore someone was actually there this time.

                          It was 1am and she was losing sleep, it started with the light scratching she heard from the inside of her closet walls. It couldn’t be rats because beatrice had an exterminator come last month. And it couldn’t be her beloved cats because they were all sleeping soundly with her, except for riolu, he’s a wildcard that prefers the roof or her desk. She was terrified, she couldn’t call out for anyone. And she didn’t want to go toward the danger. Feeling the familiar primal fear course up her spine, the desperate need to get away from this room, this place, everyone and everything. Forcing herself out of bed she crept as slowly as possible towards her bedroom door, she wasn’t going near that closet. She was almost there, hand touching the door knob, right until she heard it. Him, is was him. He was here, mei didn’t know what to do. Her entire body froze at the spot. Muscles tense and audible bones cracking. The closet door slowly creaked open, and a tall shadowy figure slowly stepped out.

[its-love-u-asshole]

asks for fanfic writers: #10-30

 Oh wow *_* First off thank you for the ask??? and your curiosity too lmaoo I know a lot of my answers will probably be boring but oh well, here goes! 

how do you do your researches? 

Well, I feel like I don’t write super complex AUs, so I rarely go into super in depth research, but when I do I usually just start with a google search or visit writing help blogs. I have several bookmarks on character analyses, strengths, virtues, and ways of showing emotion that really help me write sometimes when I’m struggling. Reading fics that are similar to what I’m going for also helps A TON omg. So yeah, nothing specific, but I do have my go-tos ^^

do you listen to music when writing?

Yes lol all the time. Half of my fics are based on specific songs as is? Like seriously name one and I could give you the song behind it honestly lmfao. So usually when a fic is inspired by a song or genre I tend to listen to it while I write!

favorite place to write

I’d say I write most productively when I’m sitting at a desk or table to be honest, when I’m on break from school I write at my parents’ dining room table because it’s really peaceful and in a closed off section of the house. Otherwise though, I write in bed because I’m lazy af orz

hardest character to write

For K, I’d say Yata (besides all the minor characters, who can be tough too, but I feel like I have a bit of wiggle room for them at least). While I don’t dislike how I write Yata, it’s always a lot harder for me than writing Saruhiko for some reason. Plus there’s lots of authors who I admire that write him SO AMAZINGLY and I’m just…I am but a pleb. 

easiest character to write

Saruhiko because I am difficult and emo just like he is -shot- In all honestly though, it’s mostly because exploring his character and thinking about how he’d act in certain situations is a lot easier and more fun for me for some reason, I don’t know ha. But yeah, I’d say writing Saruhiko is a lot more fluid for me! 

hardest verse to write

Oh man, definitely Shaking in My Skull for K project pft. It’s my favorite verse really, but sometimes it gives me a lot of issues plot wise. I worry about making it too boring or slow, and sometimes I wonder if I explain things enough, and it’s always a fight between dialogue and actions klsdnfkdsj *cough* But yeah, it’s troublesome but it’s one of my favorite ideas so I must go on lol

easiest verse to write

Nothing is easy for me to write because I suffer lmfao. But errr, maybe There You Are? Mm don’t get me wrong I know I must’ve struggled with it when I was writing it but compared to the stuff I write now, I think I finished it rather quickly, and even wrote a sequel pretty painlessly so ^^

favorite AU to write 

I love weird AUs lmaooo, like as much as coffee shops and model aus and fake dating are the best (I could read them all day ffff) I love stuff involving supernatural elements and special abilities or really weird first meetings? Like even if it’s not supernatural force just…really strange, unique scenarios always get me very excited

favorite pairing to write 

HOW DARE LOL I have no idea orz Tbh I’ve written saru-mi for so long that it’ll always hold a special place in my heart, and while I’m expanding my fandoms, it’ll definitely hold one of my top spots for a long time ^^ I love my boys ; ;

favorite fandom to write

I really haven’t written for many fandoms so I can’t say either way honestly fffff, I love K, but I also love HQ (especially right now ahh) but it really depends on the mood I’m in. Lately I’ve had pretty bad writer’s block too so I haven’t been writing much for either orz

favorite character to write

Again I’d say Saruhiko for this, because exploring his personality and thought process is so interesting and fun to me, he’s really complex but also a pain in the butt and I love him *_*

least favorite character to write

Probably Mikoto xD I really don’t get why, he’s just so reserved with words and I am a dialogue whore so that’s probably why haha

favorite story you’ve ever written

I don’t think I can pick honestly, I’m very attached to my ideas ha (whether or not I execute them well) but fffff out of my finished stuff I’d say At Your Service or Keep It in the Chat, mostly because they were super fun and silly and those are my favorite types of fics ^^

least favorite story you’ve ever written

Pencils and Paper probably, I just personally don’t think it was my best writing looking back. I wish I could’ve done it more justice, because the request was super cute and amazing, but weh I think it was wasted on me because I was still a newcomer in the fandom :P

favorite scene you’ve ever written

Oooo that’s so hard *sweats* FFF I feel like its from a fic I haven’t posted yet honestly lmao but out of what I have posted, maybe the scene in Shaking in My Skill chapter 5 where the S4 squad mourns Saruhiko, I just really love writing S4 family ughhh I adore them so much, and I got to write my brotp SaruSeri too so it was great!

favorite line you’ve ever written

Damn lmao that’s so many to choose from…hmm this one from my kuro-tsuki fic? It’s the most recent one I remember ha

Kuroo closed the gap between them as if he were the tide pulled by the moon, giving into the gravitational forces of his emotions, of Tsukishima standing so closed off but there, willing despite it all.

story you’re most proud of

Either Shaking in My Skull or one I have not yet finished or posted, it’s a saru-mi fic lmao so hopefully one day it sees the light of day. 

best review you ever got

I got a really sweet review on Chasing the Rush a little over a month ago from ckttt_sabi and it honestly made my day. Especially to get a comment so nice on my first fic for the pairing…it honestly made me so happy. They told me they loved my characterizations and how the characters interacted and how they wanted to see more from me, so I was really flattered. It meant a lot

worst review you ever got 

I’ve gotten quite a few where people would complain about how my smut fics shouldn’t be misaru they should be saru-mi, and it was just really annoying. Not necessarily negative but meh, its a big letdown to get a comment and that’s all it says -shrugs- 

favorite story/poem of another author

If we are talking fanfic, from K one of my favorite fics (tho there are a ton) would have to be Peak (Call Time) by melonsflesh on ao3 @yatatsukki

and for HQ I would have to say…Hidden Gem by realmSpinner omg it’s ongoing but it’s an amazing fic *_*

hardest part of writing

Everything lmao (just kidding), ummm for me, it’s definitely trying to keep the story from being too stiff. As in like…I feel like I tend to just rattle off actions in fics like “oh this happened and then he did this and then he said this” and I always have to try to flesh stuff out and put in details to make it more real and entertaining I think. 

Once again, thanks so much for the ask!

[recentanimenews]

THE GREAT CRUNCHYROLL NARUTO REWATCH Has a Large Hairy Son in Episodes 183-189

Welcome to THE GREAT CRUNCHYROLL NARUTO REWATCH! I’m Joseph Luster, back in record time, and I’ll be your host this week as we barrel on through all 220 episodes of the original Naruto anime adaptation. In last week's episodes 176-182, we spent most of our time in the Hidden Star Village, but that arc comes to a swift end this week. Even more filler lies beyond, though, including the start of the Peddlers Escort Mission arc in episodes 183-189.

  As you may be able to tell by the tone of some of these questions, I'm feeling a little deflated at this point. The filler can be overwhelming at times, but at least we have the occasional one-off to brighten our week. In this case, the highlight for me was most definitely the gag episode in which Naruto has to avoid laughing during a funeral despite every possible attempt to get him to crack. It might be the series' most successful attempt at straight-up comedy to date.

  The rest of the batch was mostly disappointing, but there were a few ups to go along with the downs. As Crunchyroll user OrichalcosTwin1 said in last week's comments, "I enjoyed the Hidden Star Village filler, though as you're about to find out this week, I feel it could've concluded sooner and stuck around longer than it should've." I couldn't agree more. Let's find out what everyone else thought! 

    Do you love Sumaru's Mom's Ghost and her two-hit multi-target attacks? Did the finale of the Star Guard arc surprise you in any way, or was its ending written in the stars from the beginning?

  Paul: It was good that the main resolution to the Star Village story involved the children and the other villagers rebelling against Akahoshi after he went Full Crazy-Eyes and freely confessed his evil plans to everyone within earshot, but for the ultimate confrontation, it should have been Sumaru receiving his mother's spiritual energy to deliver the final blow. This arc was Sumaru's story, and tacking Naruto onto the end like that feels like a missed opportunity.

  David: Agreed. Ending a village’s internal political strife by punching the bad guy is one thing, but letting Naruto do it instead of the character most closely affected by the whole thing is pretty lame.

  Jared: I basically laughed when Sumaru’s mom gave her power to Naruto instead of Sumaru. Way to bury the kid both figuratively and literally. Other than that, the arc ended basically how I expected with Akahoshi getting his comeuppance and being real dumb.

  Kevin: The ending was predictable, aside from the stuff that made no sense. Of course the star was going to be destroyed, that way no one can try to bring it up as a power source later. Also, apparently ghosts exist in Naruto. I guess Orochimaru could’ve had a shortcut in creating the Reanimation Jutsu.

  Danni: The whole thing just fell way off the rails, honestly. I’m so tired of evil villains in this show maniacally cackling about how evil they are while trying to kill a bunch of children.

  Kara: I realized right as we were closing out that the Village Hidden in the Stars was literally just Naruto’s excuse to have fairies, after which point I kind of gave up on it making sense at all.

  Noelle: It’s a very typical villain cliché, but I can’t say it doesn’t work. Some of that fantasy stuff sure did happen though.

  Carolyn: It was definitely… weird. I have to agree with the above, that giving Naruto the power was a very odd choice. It also just feels like really weird and awkward writing. I know we’re in the land of filler, but this series is backflipping over the shark at this point.

    It took putting Akamaru in great peril to make me realize nothing can ever happen to Kiba's sweet pee-spraying baby. Which Naruto characters would you defend with your life at this point? 

  Paul: The easy answer is Rock Lee, who is much more of a good boy than Akamaru. It's weird that Akamaru can have a full-on “An American Werewolf in Leaf Village” episode in which he severely injures numerous shinobi, including his own master, and yet he's allowed to continue his ninja-dog training like nothing happened. I figured they'd pull a trick where Akamaru wasn't infected and there was some other werewolf running around, but nope. Straight up Cujo.

  David: Over the course of all this filler I’ve gotten even more attached to Neji and Tenten. Maybe I should go back and rewatch some episodes of that Rock Lee spinoff…

  Jared: ROCK LEE. 

  Kevin: Anime, if you ever try to hurt my ninja son Rock Lee ever again, the Five Great Nations are going to become the Five Great Craters. 

  Danni: ROCK LEE DEFENSE FORCE, ASSEMBLE! [sfx: Kamen Rider transformation noises]

  Kara: Rock Lee, as the rest of the room says. And Hinata. Dear God, I can’t wait ‘til 50% of her lines aren’t “Naruto-kun…” She deserves better than she gets in pretty much any part of her life.

  Noelle: As with everyone else, Rock Lee protection squad unite.

  Carolyn: Hahaha, did we ever expect anything less than a giant chorus of people loudly cheering on good boy Rock Lee?

    The Hidden Leaf Legend episode about Onbu made me think about all the aspects of the Naruto world of which we're not aware yet. From legends to history and beyond, what are you most curious about, and what would you like to see expanded upon in future episodes?

  Paul: There should be an episode where Naruto and the other young ninja of Leaf Village get sent on a snipe hunt mission by Tsunade in search of the legendary tsuchinoko, only for Kakashi, Might Guy, and the other Jonin to prank the heck out of them. Then they actually find a real tsuchinoko during the third act, and it grows angry over them invading its territory, and hijinks ensue.

  David: I was and am still interested in essentially anything that doesn’t have to do with ninjas. How does the rest of the world operate on a day-to-day basis, and how much, if at all, are they even aware of these ninja villages that seem to constantly be at war with each other?

  Jared: I’m kind of surprised there hasn’t been more backstory on the early Hokage, unless that’s being saved for later in Shippuden. Outside of that, I think it’d be good just to dive into character backstories or just go full slice-of-life at some points.

  Kevin: Honestly, I’m most curious about jutsu creation. We’ll get at least some insight into that later in Shippuden, but even then I’d still like to know a lot more.

  Danni: I just wanna know why everyone in the Hidden Leaf Village loves the SEGA Dreamcast so dang much.

  Kara: Considering weird ninja magic is essentially part of day-to-day life, I want to know what their escapist entertainment is like. What the heck do you read action comics about when you’re already halfway to a superhero? I’m guessing they have, like, Archiemaru or something where the escapism comes in the form of severe normality.

  Noelle: Even knowing some of the stuff that comes later, there’s a lot of things that aren’t really that expanded upon. The discrepancy between technology and how that clashes or interacts with ninjutsu is one, and how ninja society seems to be something both out in the open but not something that everyone can do is another. We might get to why ninjutsu happens later, but what of the people who aren’t ninja, in a world so heavily slated toward magical powers and how those with magic seem to rule society?

  Carolyn: We see villages with normal, non-ninja people fairly regularly, but we have no idea how they live. How do the government and ninja work together? Do they work together or do the ninja sort of work on their own laws/volition? Maybe that’s been answered, but I certainly don’t remember it. 

    As episode 186 reminds us, there's nothing more powerful than a forbidden laugh. Can you recall any particularly gut-busting "church laugh" moments in your life where you really lost it when you shouldn't have? 

  Paul: One time my sister got busted for accidentally cracking up during Christmas dinner because the decorative plates we were about to eat off of had a drawing of a little hobo Frosty the Snowman, complete with patches on his snow-suit. I guess the contrast of cloth patches on a suit made out of snow was too much for her, and she burst out laughing during what was supposed to be a solemn moment. She got grounded, and the Legend of the Hobo Snowman went down in Chapman family history.

  David: I don’t remember the details but I do recall actually being sent to the principal in elementary school for being unable to control my laughter one day.

  Jared: I can’t remember the specifics, but I’m pretty sure mine was an actual church laugh moment. Something must’ve made me have the giggles or I was just in a mood but I did that when I was going to church at the time and got in a bit of trouble for it.

  Kevin: I was watching Dororo, and one episode in particular had a guest animator who apparently is known for his… unique art style. Hyakkimaru “running” (ice skating) uphill between trees forced me to pause the video so that I could stop hysterically laughing.

  Danni: I have a rather subdued laugh usually, so I can’t think of any moments where laughing got me in trouble. However, a childhood spent watching a lot of America’s Funniest Home Videos has led to an adulthood full of instinctively laughing when people hurt themselves pratfalling.

  Kara: I was on a bus in Cardiff a few years ago and there was a guy who refused to sit down or hang on or anything. The driver braked and the dude went sliding comically. A few people snickered but I busted out laughing way too big and He Did Not Appreciate That. I got off at the next stop to avoid having my head punched down my own neck. (As an aside, I’ve gotta express my appreciation for Naruto basing an entire episode around the concept of the Giggle Loop from Coupling.)

  Noelle: Admittedly, I’m not the kind of person that bursts out laughing, even if emotions show on my face. My friends saying particularly wild things in public will always get me laughing, though.

  Carolyn: Actual laugh or defensive laugh? I worked as a ride operator at an amusement park as a teen and some kids tried to run on the ride AS IT WAS MOVING. I had to use the emergency shutdown and started laughing like a maniac. The kids' parents were very angry at me for that, but some co-workers and other customers assured them it was a nervous laugh, which it was. They could have gotten very, very hurt and I didn’t know how to react to that.

As for an actual “wow that was funny” laugh … well, this story is a bit mean but it got to me hard. Outside my apartment one day, I saw a kid that was about 11-13 riding a bike and just toppled over and started laughing immediately. It was the way the bike fell. Usually, you imagine some wobbling, the handlebars going back and forth as they lose control or something. This was literally straight up to straight down in one immediate motion. It caught me by surprise. Also, the kid was fine.

    That Brings Us to the Land of Gree— you know what? Forget these veggie peddlers, we're way beyond the point of no return in Filler Purgatory. I hardly remember what it was like when Naruto was good, and the writing is at an all time low for most of this batch. Could you ever recommend this show past episode 140 or so, and has this changed the way you feel about it as a whole?

  Paul: I'm a completionist, so if I'm going to recommend something, I'm going to recommend all of it. You don't get to skip the boring or mediocre bits if you want to claim you've experienced a work of entertainment. The filler hasn't broken my spirit yet, and there are individual parts of it that I find compelling, although I admit nothing we've seen here compares to Naruto at its apex moments.

  David: I’d just recommend skipping all of it, but if you’re gonna watch any of it, the second best thing is probably to skip the arcs and watch some of the one-off episodes instead. The best part about the filler has been the focus on some side characters who didn’t get much time before, and the mostly silly single-episode adventures get you that without having to sit through nonsense stories that just make you wish you were watching the actual story instead.

  Jared: I might not necessarily recommend watching all of the filler, but maybe some of the better parts if they wanted to check that stuff out. People will watch what they watch and I’m not their dad, but I don’t think it’s necessarily all terrible like some people will lead you to believe. It certainly hasn’t changed my overall opinion of the show, it just makes me want to get back to the actual story. Although, if you want a test of endurance, then yeah, people should watch all the filler.

  Kevin: The only way I can realistically recommend Naruto after Filler Purgatory started was if I was trying to talk about all of the interesting character interactions that come from unique team combinations. Unfortunately, even the filler arcs have turned into the same few teams on a loop, and the plots aren’t nearly interesting enough to carry 100 episodes. So in all honesty, unless you just want to full Naruto experience of waiting forever to get to Shippuden or REALLY want to know everything that happens, even if it’s filler, no, I can’t recommend watching past episode 140. 

  Danni: I refused to listen to anyone telling me to skip certain arcs of Dragon Ball since they were filler. I said that if I’m gonna watch it, I’m gonna watch all of it. That being said, I really wish I could just skip ahead to Shippuden right now.

  Kara: This week of episodes has just been a hot mess. Not gonna lie. I’d been coasting because at least I could joke about them. But between this weird double-bluff veggie ninja story and the episode about Naruto adopting the kind of mascot character they’d add to a cartoon adaptation of a live-action 80s sitcom, I’m feeling anywhere from weak to done.

  Noelle: I skipped over most of the filler in my original run of Naruto, and I’d say-- yeah, I’d still rather do that. Nothing here worth noting. 

  Carolyn: I don’t think I would recommend Naruto, as a whole or just cutting off the filler parts. There have been shows I couldn’t get into and people will say to wait for season 3 or 4. I just don’t understand highly recommending something that has so much not-good in it.

    Finally, let's wrap up with the HIGHS and LOWS for this week.

  Paul: My high point was everyone trying to make Naruto laugh, especially with how the humor-assassins would take one look at him and decide that anyone with such a foolish face would be an easy mark. I appreciate the low-grade shade that reminds us that Naruto is kind of a maroon. My low-point was the end of the Onbu episode, which concludes like a mash-up of the Tribbles episode of Star Trek and Gremlins. That joke didn't so much land as belly-flop.

  David: High point was the preview for next week’s first episode - I’m excited to see Hinata getting to handle a fight on her own; hope that’s as neat as it looks. Low point was the ending of the star village arc for the same reasons I said in the first question.

  Jared: High point for this week would probably be the end of the funeral episode with the ridiculous reveal, fake out, and then reveal of the dad being alive. It was probably one step away from going full “IT’S ME AUSTIN” in terms of that. Also, Shino just getting up in Naruto's face like NEVER TELL ANYONE ABOUT THIS PLEASE. Low point would probably be basically everything else. Land of Greens is just not great and the other episodes were pretty much just there. Glad we finally get to meet Boruto though, even if I thought he came later on in the series.

  Kevin: 

High - The plan to take down the first of the enemy ninja in the Land of Greens. Sure, it’s a pretty short moment and not too difficult to figure out (he’s using his weapons as dowsing rods, so break the weapons and lure him to a place without water), but this is Filler Purgatory, and characters not being completely dumb is enough to be one of the better moments of the week.

Low - The Onbu episode. I like getting some worldbuilding, but like I said in my High, I also like characters not being excessively dumb, and practically every decision in the Onbu episode was some level of dumb.

  Danni: High point was the entire funeral episode. It was such a solid comedic concept and the payoffs all landed perfectly. It’s exactly the kind of stupid I want out of all this filler. Honorable mention to the Onba episode, which was maybe a tier below but still some good dumb fun. Low point would have to be watching another arc end with a villain maniacally cackling while trying to murder a bunch of children with a crossbow. Low LOW point was when that one kid’s dead mom became a ninja ghost who just kind of held Naruto in the air like a limp cat. 

  Kara: High point was honestly Magnet Ninja. Like seriously that’s one of the most resourceful Jutsu sets I’ve seen: just grab those headband nerds by the headband. Secondary high point was the puns in the funeral episode that didn’t get translated in the subtitles (as a former subtitle editor, though, I don’t blame them for not trying). Low point was the wrap-up of the Village Hidden in the Seelie Court.

  Noelle: High point, the funeral episode and how everything in it works pretty well. I wouldn’t say it’s all my kind of humor, but it’s functionally fairly solid. No complaints there. Low point… we’re just not going to address how fantasy elements in the afterlife are a thing now? No? Okay, I guess. 

  Carolyn: The uniforms and Naruto’s not-amused reaction to them were pretty great for me. The low point? I guess the weird ghost stuff. The last Scooby-Doo ghost episode was silly, but it also knew it was silly. They sort of took this seriously and that’s quite bizarre.

    COUNTERS:

  This Week:

Ramen: 11 bowls, 1 cup

Hokage: 4

Clones: 78

  Total So Far:

Ramen: 182 bowls, 13 cups

Hokage: 62

Clones: 789

  And that’s it for this week! Remember that you’re always welcome to watch along with the Rewatch, especially if you’ve never seen the original Naruto! Watch Naruto today!

  Here’s our upcoming schedule:

-Next week, KARA DENNISON returns to guide us through the end of the Peddlers Escort Mission!

-On August 2nd, NOELLE OGAWA shows us the formation of the Konoha 11!

-Finally, the mighty DANIEL DOCKERY returns to explore the mystery of Yakumo! 

  CATCH UP ON THE REWATCH!

Episodes 176-182: Reach for the Stars!

Episodes 169-175: Anko’s Backstory At Sea

Episodes 162-168: The Tale of the Phantom Samurai

Episodes 155-161: Quickfire Curry

Episodes 148-154: The Forest is Abuzz With Ninjas

Episodes 141-147: Mizuki Strikes Back!

Episodes 134-140: The Climactic Clash

Episodes 127-133: Naruto vs Sasuke

Episodes 120-126: The Sand Siblings Return

Episodes 113-119: Operation Rescue Sasuke

Episodes 106-112: Sasuke Goes Rogue

Episodes 99-105: Trouble in the Land of Tea

Episodes 92-98: Clash of the Sannin

Episodes 85-91: A Life-Changing Decision

Episodes 78-84: The Fall of a Legend

Episodes 71-77: Sands of Sorrow

Episodes 64-70: Crashing the Chunin Exam

Episodes 57-63: Family Feud

Episodes 50-56: Rock Lee Rally

Episodes 43-49: The Gate

Episodes 36-42: Through the Woods

Episodes 29-35: Sakura Unleashed

Episodes 22-28: Chunin Exams Kickoff

Episodes 15-21: Leaving the Land of Waves

Episodes 8-14: Beginners' Battle

Episodes 1-7: I'm Gonna Be the Hokage!

  Thank you for joining us for the GREAT CRUNCHYROLL NARUTO REWATCH! Have a great weekend, and we'll see you all next time!

  Have anything to say about our thoughts on Episodes 183-189? Let us know in the comments! Don't forget, we're also accepting questions and comments for next week, so don't be shy and feel free to ask away!

    -------

Joseph Luster is the Games and Web editor at Otaku USA Magazine. You can read his webcomic, BIG DUMB FIGHTING IDIOTS at subhumanzoids. Follow him on Twitter @Moldilox. 

By: news+feed@crunchyroll.com