#just a little annoyed about it all sorry guys. again im posting at 1am not the ideal time for me to keep thoughts to myself

[purpleleavesday]

Ughhhhh friends I fear I've been struck ill

[silver-cats]

so all the time I thought the ppl who were my acquaintances would go out without me every night 24/7 and wouldn’t include me in any of their plans and basically I thought we weren’t friends at all  me and them would make small talk in class but that’s it our friendship wasnt really a friendship at all (again hence ‘acquaintance’) but turns out this entire semester said acquaintances have been at home sleeping or reading or watching movies doing nothing basically like I have this entire semester they’ve never been out without me clubbing every night or whatever and not only that but like me they’ve been wanting to do something and be more social for the longest time but theyre just too lazy to organise something hence why they never messaged me (or anyone as a matter of fact) to do something and me being the overthinker I am I didnt want to organise something we could do together because a) like I said I already thought they did enough as it is, and if they never thought of inviting me to the many outings I thought they had then clearly I wasnt wanted so why bother them by “”making”” them” do something with me and b) and not to bring up high school trauma every 5 sec but growing up classmates (and even teachers sometimes) would tell me I was annoying and ive internalised a lot of that so to this day it makes me feel really insecure about going up to ppl to ask them to do something together but yeah turns out I was just overthinking these acquaintances like me and dont mind doing things with me they’re just too lazy to organise things for us to do and now not only do we have a WhatsApp gym group together (which is really fun actually as boring as it may sound to some ppl we go to the gym as a group of 5-6 at 12-1am and theres next to noone there so we can run round and just act childish, also gym obviously but) and Saturday we’re taking the train to another city together!!! living with anxiety isnt easy but im so proud of myself for challenging myself and taking steps to be more social because it seems to be really paying off. and sorry this is a long emo TMI post you guys but I feel too awkward to talk about how much im working on my anxiety in “real life”, this is pretty much my only outlet for sharing all my little achievements so ur all just going to have to deal 

[sweetbfs]

as a trans guy i get p dysphoric about my clothes, and ive tried wearing “””guy””” jeans for a while now but i dont think they help me much as passing bc im rather short (5’1”) so they tend to look a little baggy or loose especially when i sit down and i know clothes dont matter but some part of me tells me im not really trying when i want to wear my old jeans that actually fit :// (i also feel bad that my mom buys me jeans n i barely wear them) (i do enjoy the larger pockets tho)

as a trans guy with huge hips and a tiny waist, i’ve had so much trouble finding jeans that fit. not all guys jeans will look masc on you, and not all “girls” jeans will look fem on you. imo the best types of jeans are high waisted, plus if they’re too long i just cuff the ends up once or twice for added Gay Artsy look. in addition, the only thing you can do is try on guys jeans until you find the type right for you. belts help a lot, and you can find cheap and durable ones at h&m or target. as for “girls” jeans, try high waisted styles a size or two up. they should be baggy enough so they’re not skin tight, but not too baggy/loose. tbh i’ve had better luck w “girls” jeans, but you never know! try target, h&m, forever21, or old navy/gap. and don’t feel bad, at the end of the day it’s fabric and some types won’t always make your body look masc. good luck bud! - mod andy

Hey, I´m 5´1 and I have the exact same problem ! The thing about jeans is that you need to look for the right cut. Also, a good rule of thumb is that women´s run small and men´s run large - us short guys wanna aim right down the middle. If I´m in the women´s section I always look for boyfriend, straight leg, or relaxed fit jeans. In the men´s/boys sections, I look for skinny, tapered, sometimes bootlegs, or I try on enough jeans to find something that works.

Find something that can stay up without a belt, but fits perfectly when wearing one. Belts are a really ”masculine” accessory that not only can help you keep from looking frumpy, but that add a streamlined and professional look to your outfit as well. This is a tangent, but I´ve discovered (due to private school dress codes) the magic of belts as of late, and I´d recommend all guys out there pick up 2 belts - one brown, one black (there are some cheap & plain ones at Walmart - just make sure they fit). Also, it´s conventional to match your belt color to your dress shoe color. If you ain´t wearing leather shoes, you can forget about that.

Back to pants ! A fact of life for shorter guys is ill-fitting pant legs. For jeans, the easy way out it to cuff them, James Dean style. Rolled up legs don´t stick out or look frumpy so long as you style them right and that the cut of the jeans allows for a cuff that hangs closer to your legs rather than looking like Kevin Smith´s jorts. If you´re going the cuffing route, cuff them while trying them on in the store to make sure they look alright. If you think cuffing looks bad, you´re gonna have to have them altered.

Altering jeans isn´t as scary as it sounds. The easiest way is to just measure out the right amount and cut them off. It gives a worn and frayed look to the denim, as well as ensuring that you don´t trip on the long legs. If you hate the frayed denim trend, either you or a family member/friend are gonna have to seam the new pant legs - either by hand or by sewing machine. I´m rusty with my sewing skills, but there are plenty of youtube videos that can walk you through the process better than I can. If you don´t have that option, find a local tailor. Taking up pant legs is one of, if not the, easiest alterations out there, so it shouldn´t cost you much.

I know you only mentioned jeans, but I´m going to talk about slacks as well (sorry, like I said, I´m a private school kid). I never wore slacks before this year, aka my first year at Catholic school. They aren´t for everybody, I´ll tell you that much, but I´d recommend at least trying out one pair, preferably cheaply made and without a liner. Again, I get all of mine from walmart. It all depends on your fashion sense, but because my fashion sense lies along the lines of ivy-league dropout, slacks work great for me. Even if you´d never touch slacks with a 10-foot pole for street clothes, they work great whenever you´re going to someplace snazzy and want to avoid the possibility of having only skirts or dresses to wear, so try and find one pair that fits and you think are half decent. As my grandma said: better to have them and not need them, than to need them and not have them.

Because slacks aren´t denim, there aren´t many skinny-jean-like slacks in the women´s section - most are more relaxed. The men´s section tends to have slacks that run wider in the ass than most men´s jeans, at least from what I´ve noticed, so do be mindful of that as well. You can cuff slacks, but tbh I never do and always have mine altered. I´m just the opposite with jeans, if you were curious.

As for where to shop, I can´t recommend thrift stores enough. They´re cheap and have great selection, as well as it´s easier to convince parents to let you try on clothes there that they would think are silly (ie clothes that go along with your gender identity) then it is at a Macy´s or something, at least from my experiences. Also - Walmart is great (g-d knows I´ve plugged them enough in this post), but I also wanna mention Target. While Xmas shopping for my dad, I bought myself a nice dress shirt from their brand Goodfellows that fit great for being a men´s dress shirt, which are usually a nightmare for me. They looked to have some really nice stylish pants that I´d recommend peeping.

I had the same problem with guilt over unworn feminine clothes. Talk to your parents about your clothes ! Tell them that your fashion sense has been evolving as of late, or you want to try the current trend of more relaxed pants. It´s annoying, but it keeps them from buying clothes that make you feel dysphoric, and help improve your chances of your parents buying you clothes that you actually like ! Though I don´t celebrate Christmas, my mother got me clothes that I loved this year as a gift. Last year I hated every piece of clothing she got me, but everything this year was wonderful and masculine, and even though we have to go back to the store because nothing fit (lol), I was genuinely really happy with my clothes.

And clothes do matter. Since coming to the conclusion that I was trans, I gradually changed both my closet and my body language over the past years and they´ve helped me pass a lot better. Despite being 5´1, skinny as a rail, and a junior, I had everyone at my Catholic school (correctly) assuming I was a boy, and (incorrectly) assuming I was a freshman for a good 2 weeks at the beginning of the school year ! Passing doesn´t matter at all, unless passing makes you feel better. It´s a shitty, cisnormative ideal that can be easy to reach sometimes, and impossible to reach other times. But if passing helps alleviate dysphoria for you, as it does for me and a ton of other trans people, then I wish you all the best ! Oh, also, get a watch ! Don´t ask me why it works, I honestly have no idea, but I swear it made me pass like a dream when I started wearing one. Get a decent, gender neutral/manly watch that´s at least medium on the size scale between tiny ”women´s” and giant ”men´s” watches, and you pass SO much better. Drop $20 at, of course, walmart, hit up the jewelry section of your local thrift shop, ask your parents if they have any you might like - just get one.

It´s like 1am here and I spent ages typing out that monster of an answer, I hope that helps and is somewhat cohesive. G´night anon, good luck with your pants !

- Mod Llewellyn

[hunbomb]

dating jaehyun!!

hONESTLY IM NOT EVEN GONNA GO IN ORDER WITH THE REQUESTS RN...

sorry guys, but i will only write for the ones i have inso. for. 

its not that i don't want to write the others, but i don't have any ideas to keep the au going

- dating jaehyun is like dating a pizza pocket

- soft and squishy on the outside, but steaming hot n slightly gross on the inside

- thats exactly how u and jaehyun met actually

- y'all were at the school cafeteria y’know the usual 

- and u go to the nasty microwave to warm up ur pizza pocket

- buT noPE jeffrey from california buts u in line

- “uhm excusE mE u butted me?? i was in line before you??”

- “hhehha so? i need to warm up my lunch”

- “bIHH mOve beFOre i bUst YO aSS and turn it into a lumpy piece of poo”

- honestly jaehyun thought you were the weirdest kid ever

- tbh u were

- anYWay

- from that moment on, jaehyun found you EVERYWHERE

- in the library? he see’s u

- in the gym? he see’s u

- in the grocery store? he see’s u

- “stoP STALKING ME JFC ALL I DID WAS BUT U IN LINE NOT LIKe i kiLLED sOMEONE”

- “boi calm yo tits its not my fault even,,,you always appear after me, so technically ur stalking me”

- he hates u

- but likes u at the same time

- honestly jeffrey didn't evEn know

- aight so in science class one day

- y'all were assigned as seat partners 

- JEAHYUN DIDNT EVEN KNOW YOU WERE IN HIS SCIENCE CLASS

- low-key he was happy cause he could bug u

- and tease u

- “wow arent you happy we sit beside each other???for the rest of the year???”

- “rEST OF THE YEAR FUCC” - you

- time skip 2 months

- jaehyun and u have a pre decent friendship

- always teasing each other ya know

- “ewW jAEhyUN geT yO sweATy ass away from me”

- “its not my fault I'm hot ;)”

- “wha-that wasn't the right context- honestly i give up”

- yo but jaehyun has a huge crush on u

- like hUgE

- one of those crushes where u tease ur crush and make fun of them idek why

- anyway so jaehyun likes u rite

- and one day the science teacher decided y'all were not a good match and wanted to move u

- bUT JAEHYUN LITERALLY BEGGED RIGHT IN FRONT OF THE WHOLE CLASS NOT TO MOVE U GUYS

- “pls,,, you can't,,, i like her :(”

- u choked on ur spit

- ur teacher choked on their spit

- your class choked on their spit

- bitch when??? i was such a mofo to u (your thoughts)

- honestly though, u weren't complaining cause u liked him back

- so like the teacher decided not to move u cause

- “young love”

- and jaehyun asked u out right.there

- right.in. front. of. the. whole. class

- “will u do me the greatest honour and date me?”

- ‘jaehyun get off ur knees this isnt a proposal for marriage”

- “not yet ;)”

- ya but u do accept his love

- jaehyun likes kisses

- not pecks on ur forehead,cheek or nose

- he likes long, sensual kisses (yALL IT TOOK ME LIK 8 MINS TO WRITE THAT WITHOUT CRINGING)

- jaehyun treasures u, it may not sam like it cause he is always annoying you  but he truly believes that u r the one. 

- he once faceted u at 2am cause he “missed your face” 

- “jaehyu n we saw each other today and we have school tmrw jfc”

- total babe

- first date story time

- he wanted to make it special so he invited you over to the dorm and cooked his favourite meal for u

- then accidentally burnt himself

- and then set the heat alarm off

- and then burnt the meat

- hONestLy jAeHyuN

- its gucci though, cause you saved the day

- and y'all ended up ordering in pizza and watching netflix

- sometimes he texts u the weirdest things

- like he sent u a text a 1am saying

- “hey baby girl look out yo window, rapunzel is here for u”

- “jaehyun are you dumb? rapunzel is the princess”

- ou didn't look out the window just for that tbh

- so jaehyun had to climc up ur wall and through your window

- its ok though cause y'all cuddled

- omg jaehyun loves to cuddle

- he likes spooning you and leaving little butterfly kisses on ur neck

- speaking of which.....

- MAKING OUT WITH JAEHYUN IS HARDCORE MAN

- HE DOESNT EVEN CARE ABOUT HOW MANY HICKEYS HE LEAVES

- he likes being all rough n roamy ;)))))))

- speaking of which x2.....

- JAEHYUN SEXY TIME FUCHFHDJ

- honestly, he kinky as heLL

- anD doesnt even care

- he likes to try out new things

- “that look s cool can we try it”

- “no jaehyun thats nasty”

- but y'all end up trying it anyway

- bUT IT CAN BE SWEET

- OSHSKNSS SWEET SEXY TIME 

- A MUST HAVE

- moving on

- jaehyun sometimes appears behind u and whispers the weirdest pick up lines

- “if u were a booger, i’d pick u first”

- “do you like dragons? cause i’ll be dragon my ball across your face tonight ;)”

- sometimes u wonder why u agreed to date him

- your parents adore jaehyun

- they loVE HIM

- “aww sweetie when will you bring your bf again? he’s so sweet,caring,handsome,tall,perfe-”

- “y'all i gawdee”

- you're low-key jealous of him though cause so!many!people!like!him

- he always gets 92893289 gifts on his bday/valentines day 

- and u just get one 

- but its gucci cause atleast its from him!!!!!

- when jaehyuns sad, he tends to cut people off and wanna be alone 

- you get that because everyone needs space

- but then he gets all clingy and whiny

- and it throws u off cause i??thought??you??wanted??to??be??alone??

- honestly dis boi is a mystery

- but he’s your mystery <3

- jaehyun loves you so much he wouldn't trade u for anything cause he just loves u so much and suhushuhs he loves u ok

tis the end y'all

im gonna post neighbour!renjun next if i can

bye~!!

- emma

HONESTLY IM LIKE LOWKEY HALF ASSING EVERYTHING CAUS EIM RUNNING OUT OF IDEAS YO SEND ME PROMPTS! but no request ok those r different things