#joey you too holy shit my condolences

[nialledfromfics]

The Dating Game | Chapter Fourteen

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*a/n - few brief mentions of death/funeral

They sat on his couch. Quiet. Still. An eerie, numbing silence filling the room, almost stinging through one's ears like that of a blizzard in the dead of night. Her face was cupped in her hands, the tears slipping down her cheeks and Niall gently rubbed his hand up and down the slope of her back. He could feel the tiny gasps of her breaths against his palm as she softly cried; her body having almost met its limit but he stayed next to her, being there for her in the only way he knew how. 

They remained like that for a while before Joey eased her head up and wiped away the wetness from her cheeks. Looking over at Niall, his stare drifted over her face–puffy, red eyes and flushed tear-stained cheeks–and slipped his touch from her back to her lap, encouraging her hand into his. Joey swallowed hard, peeking down at their entwined fingers and a calmness quickly overcame her. She squeezed her hand around his and brought them up to her lips, her eyelids fluttering closed as she pressed a kiss to the back of his hand. Her chin wobbled as she looked over at Niall. 

“I’m so sorry, baby,” he whispered, reaching over to her with his other hand to brush some stuck hair off of her damp cheek. He tucked it behind her ear and she pushed out a tiny sigh. His touch felt so good to her. So safe. “Are ya okay?” 

Joey nodded her head. “I’ll be okay, once the shock wears off,” she sniffed. 

“When’s the funeral?” he asked her, tipping his head slightly as he kept his focus on her eyes. They were haunting; glassy and droopy, bloodshot from her tears. Full of sadness. He couldn’t fight the tremble of his chin as he looked at her. 

“Thursday.” 

Her watery gaze slipped away from his and Joey tipped her face back down into the cup of her hands. She choked up once more, the reality of what was going to happen, burying her grandmother in just a few days time, hitting her harder than she had expected. She had always had a close relationship with her grandmother, talked to her as regularly as she could and visited her any chance she got, but she never thought her passing, which they had all prepared for, would affect her like it was. It was almost too much for her to bear. 

Niall felt his heart completely break as he watched Joey fall apart again in front of his eyes, and an overwhelming sense of helplessness quickly invaded him. He didn’t know what to do or how to make her feel better, and without thinking, hooked his arm around her body and pulled her against him. Joey tucked her head under his chin, her face nestling against his chest as she sobbed. She wrapped an arm up around his neck and Niall kissed the top of her head, burying his nose into her hair as he held her even tighter. “Shhh...I know, love,” he breathed out, his fingers delicately combing through her hair. 

“I don’t...don’t know what I’m gonna do,” Joey muttered into the material of his shirt. “I have to get me...me and Carter over there, I gotta get us...to Florida...as soon as I can, I don’t know how…” 

“Don’t worry about that, Jo,” Niall told her as she carefully sat up and peered over at him. He gave her a turned down smile and she wiped under her eyes with her fingers. “I can fly ya out.”

Joey shook her head. “No...no, I can’t allow you to do that.” 

“Yes, you can,” he insisted with a raise of his brow. “I can get a private jet. I can have you down there by the mornin’. I can do that for you. Let me do that for you.” 

Joey flicked her stare down to her lap as she thought, her leg restlessly bouncing as she picked at her nails. “And I’m goin’ with you.” 

Her stare shot back over to his. “No! I can’t let you do that, you start your album promo in two days.”

“Jo, darlin’...I don’t care,” he said, leaning forward and resting his elbow in his knees as he stared at her. “That shit can be rescheduled. This is more important. You are more important to me. I want to be there for you, for your family. Please, just let me do this for you…”

A jumbled breath spilled past her lips at his declaration, her eyes locking firm with his. There was concern written across his face, love mixed with compassion and it made her heart heavy. She didn’t know what to say, or how she would even thank him, and she softly smiled at him before leaning over and pulling him into a hug. 

•

Niall stayed true to what he had told Joey. By that next morning, Joey and her brother, and his girlfriend, Ramona, were all boarding a private jet. Niall right alongside them. He hadn’t let her out of his sight since the night before; Alexis agreeing to watch Sadie so that Joey and her brother could fly out to her parents house as soon as possible. She gathered a few things, packed a bag and went right back over to Niall’s, staying curled up in his arms the entire night. It was the only thing that calmed her, he was the only thing that calmed her. Her exhausted body and anxious mind finally at ease as they laid together in the dark of his bedroom, quietly drifting off to sleep. 

And now there they were sitting across from each other on a private plane getting ready to take off and head towards Florida. 

“Holy crap,” Carter blurted out as he buckled himself in the plush leather seat, his eyes, and hands, taking in everything around him. He wiggled his bum. “This is the nicest thing my ass has ever sat in.”

Ramona kicked his foot with hers and Carter pulled his face in. “Don’t be weird,” the dark haired girl spat out, rolling her eyes. 

“I’m just saying, Mona, my ass has never felt this luxurious.”

Niall chuckled at the two of them as he looked across at Joey. She was already staring at him, a softness in her hazelnut eyes and a tiny smile sitting pretty on her lips. Niall smiled back at her and gave her a playful scrunch of his nose. 

“Thank you,” she mouthed to him, biting at her bottom lip. 

He faintly nodded his head in response just as the plane started to move. Pulling in a deep breath, Joey shifted her eyes to the small window next to her, silently watching the ground below move further and further away until it could no longer be seen. 

•

The plane landed in Tampa a few hours later, the air humid and thick; sticking to Joey’s skin like wet paper the second she stepped off the plane. Niall already had a vehicle waiting to pick them up to take them to her parents house, and the foursome climbed in as the driver loaded their bags before taking off on the twenty five minute drive. Joey was quiet in the car, Niall softly holding her hand in his as he sat next to her. He could feel the trembles in her fingers the closer they got to her parents house and he leaned in, placing a kiss right at her temple. 

Glancing over at him, Joey caught the stunning blue of his eyes and she smiled, only a slight hint of one but Niall saw it and smiled back at her. She was incredibly thankful that he was there with her, and as the car turned down the street and up to the stucco-sided house, she tightened her fingers around his, as if she was bracing herself.

“Feels like it's been forever since we’ve been here,” Carter mentioned as the car pulled into the driveway. Their parents were already outside, waiting together just at the end of the walkway and Joey sharply inhaled at the sight of them. She swallowed hard, attempting to hold back the wobbles of her chin as she waved at her parents, hoping the painted on smile would appease any emotions that were trying to creep in. Niall hopped out of the backseat and came around to the other side, opening the door and helping Joey out as Carter and Ramona followed. 

The driver had begun to unload their bags and Joey hurried straight over to her parents, Niall following close behind and watching as she fell into her Dad’s arms, the tears she had been attempting to hold back, spilling easily from her eyes. Shoving his hands down into his pockets, Niall stayed back a bit, shifting on his feet as he let Joey, Carter and Ramona each have their time saying hello. He didn’t feel like it was appropriate to introduce himself at that very moment, and he waited until Joey had lifted her face from the confines of her mother’s shoulder. 

She wiped the wetness from her cheek with the back of her hand as she spun around to look for him. Smiling when she saw him, Joey motioned him over with a flick of her fingers. “C’mere,” she said quietly. 

Niall bowed his head, his lips turning down at the corners as he stepped closer to her and her parents. “Mom, Dad...this is Niall,” Joey introduced him between sniffles, her hands threading around Niall’s arm as he peeked up and gave them a friendly grin. “My boyfriend.” 

“Oh...my, Jojo, he's so handsome!” Her mother exclaimed, bringing him into a hug by a soft pull of the shoulders. Niall chuckled and hugged her back. 

“It’s so nice to meet ya both,” he said, after giving her father a hug as well. “I wish it were under better circumstances, to be honest. I really am sorry for your loss.” 

Joey grabbed Niall’s hand, gripping tight as her father nodded. “That’s so kind. We really do appreciate all that you’ve done to get our kids to us so quickly. It means so much to us.” 

“Of course,” he said, peering down at Joey. Niall breathed out a soft smile. “I’d do anythin’ for this one.”

•

The following couple days felt like a whirlwind to Joey. There was so much to do and so much to plan, from making sure the house was clean to organizing the wake and planning the reception for after the funeral, she wasn’t sure there was enough hours in the day to get it all done. She was incredibly busy, running nonstop and doing all that she could to take some of the stress off her mother, but with extended family flying in and everyone, of course, stopping by to see them and offer their condolences, it just seemed almost impossible. 

Niall was doing his best to keep Joey as calm and grounded as he could, he could see how she was trying to keep her mind off of everything by not giving herself a second to even breathe, so he stepped in and helped with whatever was asked of him. Whatever work her mother or father put him to, he was ready and willing without a question. He was a hundred percent there for Joey and whatever her and her family needed at that time, that was what he was going to do. 

The night before the funeral, with the clock nearing midnight, Niall and Joey found themselves laying in bed in one of the guest bedrooms. It was beyond hot, long after the sun had gone down but still lingering that heavy stickiness in the air. They laid side by side, staring up at the whirring ceiling fan with a light duvet barely covering their bottom halves. It was quiet, not uncomfortable or weird, just that soft delicate kind of quiet that would ease over your mind as your eyelids grew heavy, one that no one cared to disturb. 

Niall could hear Joey inhaling sharp, shallow breaths, and he knew by the constant fiddle of her fingers on the seam of the blanket that laid across her hips, that her thoughts were spinning around just as fast as the overhead fan. Tucking his one arm up under his head, Niall glanced over at Joey before gently grabbing her hand in his, hoping to settle the anxious clatter of her fingers. Her breaths stalled for a split second as she felt his touch on her, and she slowly slid her light brown eyes over to his. 

She dragged her gaze along the soft lines of his face that she could make out in the darkness, sinking her teeth into her bottom lip as she pushed out a shaky sigh. “None of this seems real,” she said to him, her voice low and meek. Joey squeezed her fingers around his at the outward acknowledgment of her own honesty. His touch did help her more than he probably realized. “That she’s...gone, ya know? I just talked to her, like, two weeks ago. She was doing well, too. It was her birthday and Mom had skyped Carter and I so we could see her.” 

Niall licked across his lips and pulled in a deep breath. “I know, I’m sorry, petal.” 

Rolling over onto her side to face him, Joey tucked their entwined hands up under her chin. She pressed a tiny kiss to his bent knuckles. “It’s just crazy how fast things can change,” she went on, catching Niall’s stare in the dark haze of the room. “One minute you’re here, feeling good, laughing and smiling and happy and the next…” She swallowed hard and buried her nose down against the skin of his hand. Her eyes fluttered upon breathing him in. He smelt of the hand soap that her parents kept in the guest bathroom. 

“Life is fucked up like that, Jo, it really is,” he said to her, yanking his arm out from under his head to reach over and gently tuck some of her red hair behind her ear. “Never know what’s gonna happen. It’s why you gotta live for today. Do what makes ya happy, and fuck everythin’ else.” 

Lifting her eyes up, Joey met his stare and noticed a slight gleam across the middle of his pupil from the moon shining in through the bedroom window. He was so pretty. So pretty it made her insides crumple up and her heart beat so fast, it was like it would thump right out of her chest. And he was right, you have to do what makes you happy. She smiled at him and brought her hand up to delicately cup around his jaw. Her thumb traced his lower lip, just barely and he moved his chin to press his lips to the pad of her finger. “Thank you,” she whispered, tenderly scratching her nails through his beard, “you’ve gone beyond…anything I could have asked for this week. Flying us all out here, paying for my families’ hotel rooms and for the reception, helping my dad with yard work,” she paused and giggled faintly at the last bit, “really, Niall...I appreciate it all so much. You don’t even know how much it means to me.”

He smirked. “I’m happy to help, my love.” 

“I should have told you thank you sooner, I don’t know what is wrong with me, I was just-...my mind-...” 

“Jo, it’s fine. I don’t need a thank you,” he told her, “I would do anythin’ for you, I hope ya know that.” 

Joey faintly nodded, biting at her bottom lip. “I don’t know how I’m ever gonna repay you.” 

Cradling his hand around the side of her neck, Niall leaned in and pushed a kiss to her lips. “You don’t have to repay me,” he muttered against her mouth. “That’s not why I’m here or why I’m doin’ any of this. I’m here for you, just you...and anythin’ I can do to make sure you’re okay.” 

Joey sniffled as his sincere words floated past her ears and she eased him into another kiss. “Thank you.” 

Nestling herself into him, Niall wrapped his arms around her body and held her, his chin resting on the top of her head as Joey’s eyes fell closed, finally drifting off into a deep sleep.

•

Joey woke up the next morning with a heaviness in her heart. She dreaded having to get out of bed; having to move from Niall’s embrace and having to actually face the day. Snuggling a bit more into his chest, Joey grumbled a bit as she felt his hand come up and sweep her hair away from her temple. Her arm tightened around his middle, almost as if she was locking him in place and refusing to allow either of them to move, and Niall chuckled slightly before lifting his head up just enough to place a kiss to Joey’s forehead. 

“We’re gonna have to get up soon, babe,” he mumbled to her, softly tracing his fingertips over her cheek. 

“I know.” 

“You okay?” 

Joey pulled in a deep breath and slowly peeled open her eyes. Her fingers lightly danced over the skin at his side. “No.” 

Niall squeezed his arm around her upper body and nestled her in closer. His lips rested at the top of her head. “I’m here for you, Jo,” he assured her, his breath warm against her scalp. “I’m not goin’ nowhere.” 

Sighing, Joey closed her eyes again, determined to get a few more minutes of peacefulness. “I know.”

The funeral was beautiful. It was bright, uplifting and full of joyous memories and quiet tears. It was everything Joey’s grandmother would have wanted. Niall was as comforting and supportive as Joey had hoped, holding her hand as they sat in the front row pew with the rest of her family. He let her cry on his shoulder when she needed, or just listened to her vent about her invasive aunt if that was what she needed too. He was there for her in any way he could be, any way she might need him to be and he made sure she knew that. 

Niall wished he could say that there was one singular moment that made him fall in love with Joey, but he couldn’t. There were a bunch of tiny moments, ones that stick with someone for the rest of their life whenever they think of that person, and for Niall is was the way she slipped her hair over her one shoulder as she spoke, or the inviting sound of her giggle, the way her eyes lit up every time she looked at him, or how she would softly cup around his jaw when she kissed him. It was tiny things, little things that made Niall’s heart rattle in his chest and his tummy flip in on itself with every thought of her. And as he watched her slowly pace around her parents house during the reception, a simple black dress adorning her body and a semi-forced smile on her lips as she went from person to person to show her gratitude for being there, it was no different. 

That had to be one of the hardest moment’s of Joey’s life so far, at least while they were together, and he was there to experience it all with her. It was the first time that he had wanted to be there in that way for someone else, where nothing else mattered but their happiness and their feelings and Niall didn’t want to say that up until that point he had been selfish and oblivious in his relationships, but maybe...maybe he had been. Being with Joey changed him, in a good way, in a better way. In a way that he never would have expected.

Sipping on his alcoholic drink, Niall stayed quiet as he stood off to the side of the room and watched her. He didn’t want to impose, she had already made introductions to most of her family earlier in the week, but just wanted to make sure he was near if she needed him. His blue eyes floundered over her as she stood about twenty feet away from him, a glass of gin in her one hand and the other motioning as she spoke to an older couple that Niall hadn’t met yet. He licked across his lips, tucking a hand down into the pocket of his black trousers as Joey reached behind her neck and swept her red hair over her shoulder. Niall breathed out a half smile. 

She was stunning, and Niall couldn’t fathom how this woman could become more beautiful to him as every day passed. It was like she had stolen every ounce of his heart and made it her own. He loved how strong she was, even in her vulnerability, she was willing to push it aside to be there for her parents, her whole family. He loved how passionate and determined she was. He loved how caring and generous she was, how much she was willing to put her heart out there. He loved everything about her. He loved her. 

He loved her. 

Joey could feel his stare on her. It was a warmth that immediately filled her, punched across her skin like a bee sting jolting her body awake and from the confines of the racket going on in her head. She loved that he could make her feel that way. Biting at her bottom lip, there was a moment where the words from the couple she was speaking to had started to drown out, clouding around her ears like she was in a cotton stuffed box and that was when she felt the heat prickle her flesh. She knew he was near, he had been near all day, either right next to her, or just off to the side, quiet and demure, just there to support her if she needed. Joey had never had anyone be like that with her before, never had that unconditional support and constant reassurance that they were there for her, just for her with no other intentions or obligations behind it. It almost felt surreal. Like a dream. 

She hadn’t even expected him to be there for the funeral, not that she didn’t want him to be, but he was a busy man, and she would have never expected him to postpone his album promo, put his career on hold just to be at her side. But he did, he did and he did that for her. He was there for her and the thought made her heart thump like the stampede of horses and her breath stick heavy in the back of her throat. 

Slowly sliding her stare over to where he was standing across the room, the jitters pulsing through her veins ceased the second her light brown eyes met his. He looked so handsome. Dressed in a pressed black suit with his hair soft and swept to the side. He had a sweet smile tugging at the one corner of his mouth, that tiny little dimple just barely pressing into his left cheek and Joey’s knees nearly buckled. She swallowed hard, dipping her head down in a mused grin. Her eyes watched the ice cubes in her cup bubble through the bitter liquid that surrounded them and she sucked in a shaky breath. Time and time again, he made her feel so many things, so many things that she had never felt before in her life. Things that she had spent years wishing she would be able feel one day and there she was, feeling them. Feeling them strong and loud, powerful and all consuming. In her heart, in her body, in her soul. She was feeling it all, and she was feeling it for him. 

Just him. 

She was so madly and intoxicatingly in love with him, she almost couldn’t comprehend it. 

Looking back over at him, Niall tipped his head to the side a bit, his one brow raising slightly. He could tell she was getting a bit anxious, overwhelmed as the people in front of her continued to babble on and Joey ran her tongue over her bottom lip, her eyes dropping to the floor and Niall knew she needed him. Taking a gulp of his beverage before setting it down on the table beside him, he started to walk towards her and her gaze followed his movements until he was standing right next to her. “Hello, I’m Niall,” he interjected himself to the couple, taking the attention off of Joey. “I’m Joey’s boyfriend.” 

The two elderly people, now free of words, looked him up and down before greeting him with a smile. “How do you do, young man,” the older woman said, shaking Niall’s extended hand.

He smiled and peeked over at Joey, who was already staring at him and siding her one hand into his that hung between them. Niall squeezed his fingers around hers as he focused his words back at the older couple, engaging them in frivolous conversation. 

But Joey’s stare never left him. They stayed glued to the side of his face, watching and listening, in awe of the man that was by her side that she was lucky enough to call hers. He was incredible and sincere in everything he did, how he treated her and that thought, just having him next to her, feeling the heat of his body, made a calmness invade her entirety. A smile overtook her balm covered lips and Joey leaned into him, resting her temple just at the round of his shoulder. 

She had never felt more safe, or more loved in her life as she did in that moment. And she never wanted to let him go. 

•

The next morning, after saying goodbye to her parents and making sure everything had been settled, the two young couples were once again at the tiny regional airport getting ready to make their way back to LA. Sitting on the tarmac, the jet was still being prepared for their flight as the four sat in the car, waiting patiently. Niall and Joey were occupying the middle row with Carter and Ramona in the very back and the driver in front with his walkie talkie, keeping notice of when their plane would be ready to board. 

Niall held Joey’s hand as he scrolled through his phone, the redhead staring out of her window and down the long runway of the airport before she whipped her head to look at him. “Niall?” 

“Hmm?” 

“How do you know when you’re done?” 

The question caught him a bit off guard, a knot cinching in his tummy as he stalled his thumb on his phone screen and slowly turned his face to catch her stare. “Done? With, um...what?” 

“This…” she paused and shrugged her shoulder, “ya know, this...crazy dating game we all play.”

Niall buckled his brows as he clicked off his phone and dropped it into his lap. Taking in a deep breath, he reached up to run his fingers through the front of his hair. “Um...I dunno, that’s a tough one, love,” he said as he licked across his lips, “I guess...maybe when ya find someone that makes ya want to stop playin’ the game.” 

Joey sighed through pursed lips, her eyes dropping to where her hand was cradled in his. She rubbed across his skin with the pad of her thumb. “I think…I wanna stop playing the game,” she told him, locking her gaze with his. 

“Really?” Niall muttered, swallowing hard. 

She shrugged. “I figure, once you’ve won...that’s it, right?” Joey went quiet and Niall just faintly nodded his head, the corners of his mouth turning down. She could see a slight blush filling his cheeks and she gave him a sweet smile. “Well...I think I’ve won.” 

Niall just stared at her, his own words, ones that had been fumbling around in his head for the past few weeks, now stunted on the tip of his tongue. His lips fell open, along with the confines of his heart and before he could muster up a single intelligent thought, the driver turned around to look back at the group. “The plane is ready to board, Mr. Horan.” 

Niall shot his eyes to the driver and quickly nodded his head. “Oh...um, okay, yeah...t-thank you.” Joey slipped her fingers from Niall’s to grab her purse from the floor before she slid over to open her door. She climbed out without another word and folded the seat up to let Carter and Ramona out from the back. Pulling in a deep breath, Niall brushed the nerves away that were gurgling in his belly with a shake of his head before slowly getting out of the car. 

Joey had already rounded the back of the vehicle and was making her way towards the lowered steps of the plane, Carter and Ramona bickering as they followed behind her and Niall just at the tail end, when he eased his feet to a stop. His heart was leaping, doing somersaults in his chest and he swore the air outside had risen to a sweltering 150 degrees. There was sweat pooling at the base of his neck, dripping down his hairline and he had only stepped out from the air-conditioned car not more than thirty seconds prior. But he was about to do something that he had been wanting to do since the second he saw her, since the first time he had heard her laugh. Since the first time they kissed. And it would all come down to that exact moment. 

“Jo!” 

The breeze had picked up, cooling Niall’s sticky skin slightly as Joey halted and twisted around at the sound of her name. “Yeah?” 

By that time, Carter and Ramona had also paused their steps on the concrete, all eyes now pressed curiously to Niall as he took a step forward, making sure his voice was loud enough to carry through the dense humidity of the Florida air. “I wanna stop.” 

Furrowing her brows, Joey tilted her head just a bit, confused by what he was trying to say to her before Niall realized how his words had come out. He shook his head. “No, I mean...the game,” he tried to explain, holding out his hands, “I wanna stop playin’ the game.” 

Joey stayed quiet, Carter and Ramona flicking their stares between the both of them. “Jo….” Niall went on, his eyes focused on hers as he took another few steps towards her. “There’s so much I wanna say, but...I’m so fuckin’ in love with you.” 

Her chest tightened at his words, clear as day seeping over her ears and filling her head with a dizziness that nearly consumed her. Her heart was racing, knocking at her ribcage and making it almost impossible to catch her breath. Choking out a nervous chuckle, Joey smiled as she dropped her bag to the ground and without wasting another second, rushed back to him, colliding her body into his as she grasped his face and kissed him. Kissed him hard, and with purpose. Her lips rolled over his, giggling against his tongue and Niall wrapped his arms around her middle, cradling the slope of her back and holding her tightly as he kissed her back with all his might. 

His one hand dragged up to cup her head, fingers curling into her red hair and she kissed him even deeper, harder before she inched back with a faint gasp. Her hands were locked around the back of his sticky neck, fingernails scratching up into his hair as she rested her forehead to his. Her eyes were pressed closed, and she was struggling to properly breathe but nothing could stop the smile that was spreading so naturally over her lips. 

“I’m completely in love with you, Niall,” she whimpered against his parted mouth, “I love you.” Her eyes eased open, met with his gorgeous stare and she pressed her lips to his again, Niall locking his grip around her waist as he picked her up in his arms. The couple could hear the faint ‘whoop, whoop’ cheers of Carter and Ramona behind them and they both chuckled as Joey slipped her lips away from his. 

Burying her face down into his broad shoulder, she tightly hugged her arms around his neck. “Let’s do it,” she whispered, against the side of his throat, her voice no longer riddled with apprehension. “I wanna be with you, I wanna move in with you. I want everything with you.”

She felt Niall tense up within her embrace at her sudden declaration and she slowly lifted her head from the crook of his shoulder to stare up at him. He had lowered her feet back to the ground at that point, a warm swirling breeze causing some of Joey’s hair to float across the front of her face and he smiled down at her as he reached up and gently brushed strands of her hair behind her ear. Joey swallowed hard as she darted her stare with his, wondering and hoping that he had heard what she had said and she watched as a wateriness began to fill the brims of his eyes. She sighed, so softly that it made a flutter roll around in his belly. 

Her glassy stare stayed on his, and they stood quiet for another solid minute before Niall nodded his head. “Yeah...yeah, baby,” he said to her, “we can do that.”

He took her hand, the couple smiling big at each other as Niall began to lead them towards the plane. “C’mon, let’s go home.” 

THE END